I need a place to word vomit and I certainly can't do it on facebook. I feel so damn silly for a having any ounce of hope that the idea of putting myself out there was going to do any form of good when of course the only thing it could possibly do is destroy my mental health. I remember why I chose to be single and focused on my career. But I want that human connection so badly it presses deep into my chest and my chest feels like it's truly going to explode with want and desire for something that feels so impossible for me to obtain. How could any person take one look at me and desire me. I wish I hadn't tried because now there's this incredibly dull ache. My anxiety had been getting better until it became reactivated by my anxious attachment. I truly feel stupid. Silly girl, there's no boy for you.













