i fucking thought you said weast

explosion at health potion factory 0 dead 0 injured

put ya armpit on the phone i miss her

lol yeah go ahead try and attack me *notices i left my dragon scale talisman of immortality at home* or maybe lets not be too hasty

“no job is worth your physical & mental health” i hauve. Bills.

i love when “just quit!” is thrown out as a suggestion. like damn thank you i’ve never thought of that before ever. in my life. There are these things called groceries and doctor visits

"preheat"? dude i dont even HEAT my oven. thats right. im cooking my shit coldstyle. im stretching the definition of "cooking" far beyond its ultimate tensile strength. my chicken breasts are the most gorgeous pink color you've ever seen. they look like rosebuds on the very cusp of blooming. they look like the dawn when you're in love. hospital.