i think of you all the time.

Maybe I too will feel different eventually, but being told "feel this or else you're bad" drives me nuts in these situations. My feelings are slow, can I please have room to feel them?

As you said, we are multi faceted entire people and I do not want to be told I'm a misogynist or abuse apologist for not immediately condemning someone. It's tiring.

Again, I genuinely appreciate it. I don't have the stomach to do it. You don't have to respond/maybe for the best if you don't.

I hope you don't mind me answering this. I feel that currently it's important for me to do so, so no one else feels alone.

You are not a bad person for questioning things, you are not a bad person for taking time with your emotions and you are especially not a bad person for waiting for confirmation.

It's speculation, that's all it is. We only know a bit of the story, we don't even know the full half of the story we've been given. Only pieces. How can we judge off of that? Why are we expected to change everything around us when such little information is offered?

I am voicing my differing opinion so others can be aware that it is not black and white. As you said, humans are multi faceted. Every situation involving people is not going to be black and white. There are going to be grey areas, there are things that are going to be blurry.

Making a quick judgement because a bunch of people on the Internet tell you to, is not fair to any party. I understand if that what you needed for yourself, but for me I needed to look at it differently or else I would've driven myself insane. It would be a different story if we had solid, clear evidence that it was who everyone thinks it is. But we don't.

I talked to my therapist about being told to feel shame (I was told this by someone in a reblog and in multiple asks, thanks anons! /sar). She told me

"You're in charge of what you feel, no one else is. Do you think you should feel shame [for not following the pack]?"

I told her no, and I wouldn't expect anyone else to feel shame either. We are human, but we need to have empathy for our fellow humans. The ones around us who are hurting or are simply taking a slower approach.

We don't know anything definite. Don't expect anyone to make a decision off speculation.

I don't know how I have the stomach, besides the fact I am tired of having to sit back and watch people tell others and myself how we're horrible people for taking a different look at it.

PLEASE BRO

anymore i feel as tho there are two sides to a fandom. the one who like to sit back and bask in content, maybe following a few update blogs or accounts so they’re updated on the most recent events involving their favorite creator.

and then there’s the people who dig too deep into someone’s personal life. they treat them as a friend and not a stranger constructed of pixels on a screen. they talk about them and refer to them as if they know them in real life.

these people concern me, constantly digging into the lives of those online, and making it an ultimate hell for everyone else.

parasocial relationships are an evasion of privacy, a way to start rumors and lies, a thing that can make or break a persons online presence.

parasocial relationships will most likely scare people off the internet, leaving other fans with nothing to watch, with no comfort creator or streams, maybe even video to look forward too.

please, if you’re going to be a fan of someone be normal.

there’s a perfect term for this; stan. stalker-fan.

don’t be a stan. be a normal fan.

consume the content, leave a like and positive comment, and move on.

don’t treat them like a friend. don’t talk about them like a friend. don’t act like they’re your friend. because they’re not.

if you only know them through a screen, their posts are just a bunch of 1’s and 0’s to you; they are not your friend.