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Logging on today to see that zero cycle was taken down (for good reason) was so so heartbreaking but unfortunately not at all surprising. I’m not usually an RPF fan, and this problem seems to be much more prevalent in RPF spaces, where the subjects of fics can quite literally be contacted, but I’ve been noticing a trend that extends outside those spaces as well.
I’ll never claim to be an expert, but fandom spaces (tumblr, ao3) have been so incredibly important to me for the majority of my life now. I have loved finding such wonderful communities of ppl to obsess about Merlin, Sherlock, Marvel, or whatever else with on these sites. For a long time (and honestly even now) I was never comfortable sharing w others in my real life that I read fanfic and engage in fandom, and I think that was a common experience, but that’s no longer the case.
I can’t pinpoint exactly when I started to see a change, but over the past few years, and then especially with the incredible popularity of Heated Rivalry, many people who would usually look down on fandom spaces started to engage with them more, coming to tumblr from X, TikTok, insta, etc. without a real understanding of how these communities work and stay respectful. It should absolutely be a good thing that reading fanfic, engaging in fandom is no longer something people are ashamed of, but there is a flippancy and casual disrespect associated with this culture that is harmful to people who have been engaging in these spaces for years, especially authors.
It is not ok to treat fics, fanart, and other fandom works the same way you would other forms of media. It is not ok to enjoy these works and then, in the same breath, disrespect their creators by ignoring their express wishes. As @callsignrex put it, fic authors did not sign up to be celebrities. Taking their works out of fandom spaces leaves them open to harassment and worse from non-fandom communities online that they did not sign up for!
Fandom was never meant to be exclusive, but it is something that can be so inherently personal. Treating tumblr and ao3 like other social media platforms is harmful because it assumes that authors are churning out content for another algorithm, instead of (often) deeply personal writing that they wrote first and foremost for themselves, as well as to be discussed with kindred spirits around the world. Fandom communities stay special and safe and sacred as long as the people within them respect others’ wishes and treat others as human beings, not just faceless usernames behind a screen. I would not be able to bear seeing fandom spaces be stomped out by the same insensitivity that plagues social media.
If you are entering a fandom community for the first time, please. just don’t be horrible. Don’t let your enthusiasm stop others from being able to safely engage with fandom as well. Fandom is beautiful and supportive and creative and incredible; be respectful, you’ll thank yourself later.
My third born if you continue the hollanov - marleau threesome ficlet. Ilya at the end especially......the buzziest thing I've read in a while 🙏🏻
third continuation of this short post (and the next) where shane tipsily contemplates getting squished between ilya and marleau’s sweaty bodies <3
a little over a month passes, and shane thinks about getting pseudo panini-pressed between ilya and marleau at the club damn near every day.
strangely enough, they don’t talk about how hard he got that night. ilya doesn’t bring it up and shane sure as fuck isn’t going to, despite how uncharacteristic it is of his husband to pass along an opportunity to tease him. it just…melts away, this hot little memory that shane can still feel in his body when he closes his eyes, but is never cornered to talk about. which has to mean he’s in the clear. safe.
how could he know he’s laid himself perfectly limp between the jaws of both bears?
it’s the first time shane's been inside cliff marleau’s house.
he's got an impressive indoor pool that mostly just the girls are interested in. shane came dressed for the occasion, but he's a little too on edge to be wet and soggy right now. it's why he keeps turning down drinks too. gotta keep a level head. no need for an embarrassing repeat of the last time he was in the same room as ilya and his certified best friend.
other than that, shane's having a wonderful time. there's a couple guys he ends up talking puck with as the moon climbs higher and higher beyond the wall of windows, the intensity with which he lets himself indulge quickly becoming the perfect distraction from the danger that seems to be looming on the perimeter.
maybe it's in his head. maybe he's paranoid. but probably three times now, shane has glanced up and been met with the startling image of ilya and marleau already looking at him from the far side of the echoing room, continuing their conversation as they casually lean against the wall. to say it sets him on edge is an understatement. to say it doesn't light a hint of morbid curiosity in his lap would be a lie. but then one of the guys brings up the powerplay from predators/wild game last night and shane's locked back in on what really matters.
it isn't until around midnight that he starts getting husband withdrawals. ilya looks irresponsibly hot over there in his cross and short little swim trunks, hair still perfectly styled because he too has been avoiding the pool. and now, he's sitting on that lounger all by his lonesome - can't have that. (there's literally like five girls around him but no one is actually sitting with him because that's his spot, just to be clear.) shane excuses himself from the conversation that's turned disappointingly to golf and saddles right up to ilya where he sits, nudging a hip into his shoulder with a quiet little, "hey, handsome..."
he's greeted with a hand reaching up to snake around his middle. a tug over so he can press his lips into the cut of shane's hip bone, sighing happily into the kiss he leaves there.
ilya's ready for enrichment.
"come snoop with me."
the small room off the corner is quiet and chilly, goosebumps immediately raising to shane's bare chest as they help themselves into the quiet space. it's a bar and game room of sorts. dark floors and wood paneling. big, black-felted pool table in the middle. stainless steel refrigerator built in behind a solid wood bar. mahogany maybe. it's the awards case that shane finds himself stalling at, of course.
"hm..." he hears ilya comment behind him, and he just knows that man is standing there with his hands on his hips, nodding as he looks around. "impressive."
kinda funny. but this is cliff marleau they're talking about. "no way you haven't been in here before."
"years ago yes. since he remodeled? no."
shane's ears perk up at that, his head turning. 'remodeled', he says... "did he do it himself? contract someone?"
as if he just asked to get bent over the pool table and fucked raw, ilya hums. dastardly. "mm, you are hornier than i thought, my love..."
"fuck you..." shane scoffs and goes back to the trophy case, although his grin grows with his husband's steady approach behind him, "i'm not horny at all." thank you very much.
"hm..." familiar heat at his back. lips at his ear and a hand gliding down his bare stomach, finally grabbing over his crotch in experimentation. "no...? not a little, even-"
"god damn - make yourselves at home, huh?"
shane startles at the deep, lazy voice that suddenly joins them from nowhere, his heart doing a quadruple backflip into his ass that could probably win some awards of its own, as long as he stays alive. because christ.
behind them, cliff marleau rounds the pool table without stopping. he's clearly on a mission. and shane's not sure if his nonchalance over the whole situation makes things better or indescribably worse. all he knows is he feels the sudden urge to move. to side-step from ilya's handsy clutches until he's free from him entirely.
"sorry." okay, why did he say that? he didn't need to say that.
"yes, very sorry marly," ilya piggybacks, although he doesn't sound the least bit convincing. "shane was just wondering if sexy new remodel was your doing."
shane bristles. what the fuck? "didn't call it that."
"didn't have to."
"buddy and me did it," marleau answers all the same, now making his way toward the fridge in the corner. "took a couple summers, but she's a fuckin' beaut, don't ya think?"
ilya hums, but it's not him marleau's looking at.
shane flicks his eyes away. somewhere along the pool table by the solid red three. it'd be awesome if he didn't still feel the phantom weight of ilya's hand palming over his dick. "it's great."
the room fills with the clink of bottles as the refrigerator door swings open, and he uses the opportunity to cast a look over to his husband, nodding pointedly at the door behind him. they need to leave. this is...weirdly intimate. in a way he can't quite nail down, but the ball of nerves in his belly is well-equipped to determine.
ilya observes it all. processes shane's wordless request.
and then he promptly ignores it.
"got an opener on ya?" marleau is saying from behind the bar. "i know you do, roz."
he does. it’s the same one he’s had on his keyring since they were teenagers. the same one he pulls from the pocket of his swim shorts now, keys jingling as he unclips it and then hands it to shane, of all people.
“bring this to him for me please, won’t you sweetheart?”
shane...stares at the bottle opener resting in his palm. looks up at ilya. suspiciously.
something is afoot.
but ilya’s usually devilish expression is so calm. even a little confused as he flicks his attention away and then back to shane. like he’s the one not in on the joke. and...
okay, shane’s being paranoid. it’s official.
annoyed at the sketchy path his dick is steering his common sense down, he grabs the bottle opener and turns to where marleau has stepped out from the bar to rest against the back wall.
tall motherfucker. an imposing figure, even without all the hockey gear. he’s in his trunks too, but has thrown a thin black tank top on, something shane envies as the goosebumps rise over his skin with each step closer.
it’s more than a little crazy how short he makes shane feel, towering over him even in his slump against the wall. jesus, he’s a beast. and when he takes the offered opener, the corner of marleau's mouth curves into a half-grin. "you're a doll."
right...
"he is..." ilya chimes in somewhere behind them. "so sweet."
"a real peach."
"my little-"
"okay." shane snaps it, effectively cutting off...whatever this is before the pair can really get going. he's unpleasantly aware of the heat that's climbed to his face and it's from anger, obviously. annoyance. "it's a fucking bottle opener - get a grip." and a bottle opener! it’s his own home bar, for fuck’s sake!
marleau assesses this with a casual little eyebrow raise, but pops the top off his beer all the same, tossing it toward the bartop without looking and then bringing the bottle to his lips.
in the closer space, shane's eyes are naturally drawn to the movement of it all - the beer fizzing from the sudden release of pressure - the soft glug and pour from the clear glass neck into marleau's mouth, attention drawing even further down to his bobbing adam's apple as he drinks, and then his hand as he holds the opener out for him to take back.
shane swallows, all at once aware of his eyeline.
jesus, hollander, get it together.
with a tense of his jaw, he reaches out to put an end to this weird little fever dream. but when he grabs the opener, marleau's fingers smoothly wrap around it, keeping him from taking it back.
shane frowns, frustration simmering in a way that makes his hackles rise. it’s the final straw. he’s officially sick of being messed with, and showing that means giving a sturdy tug this time to-
“easy,” ilya’s voice crops up and it’s so close behind him, suddenly. dangerously close. pressing right up into him for some reason, just like how his body slots up to frame shane’s back and-
it’s immediate warning bells.
an immediate jab to his pulse, shane’s instincts only kicking in to recognize the trap once it's already clamped down around him.
his body shifts away from the muscle memory of the touch but he’s gotta keep his cool in front of marleau. especially since it's him he's facing this time.
“ilya…” shane warns, and he wishes it was steadier. “what are you doing…”
he can feel his husband’s easy shrug. it’s just as casual as his tone when he answers, “nothing,” and then tilts his head to speak around him. “what are you doing, marly?”
a couple steps away, marleau follows suit. “nothing.” they’re still in a standoff with the bottle opener between them, a hand on each side. “what’re you doin’, hollywood?”
a flush settles over shane’s face at the name. nine times out of ten, he finds marleau calling him that so fucking annoying, but he guesses he just found the tenth time where he’s gonna let it fly. because what else can he say? ‘what are you doing, hollywood?’ he’s about to get fucking panini-ed is what he’s doing. “i don’t-…think we should-”
“don’t think we should what?” ilya steps in closer, which forces shane to stumble forward too, his grip tightening from the sheer need to hold onto something as his world narrows into the thinning space between him and marleau.
ilya's asking him questions he already has the answers to. he knows what he’s doing, even if marleau doesn’t. and shane’s brain is on the fast track to short circuiting just like it did at the club, only this time he's much more aware of the situation. another step - another inch - and he's eyeing the quickly closing exits on both sides. he can make a humiliating but precious getaway if he just pulls out of ilya’s arms and-
light catches in the beer bottle as marleau tips it to his lips for another drink, condensation trickling down the sweating glass. it’d be innocent - absolutely nothing at all - if it wasn’t for how those dark eyes stay planted on shane’s face the entire time.
oh yeah. he needs to get the fuck out of here.
“ilya…” he tries again, but it's just as the bottle opener is being lifted from his loosened grasp, effectively freeing up the space between them for another step forward and-
shane’s pulse leaps from his rib cage as his chest is forced to press into the tight, muscled heat of marleau’s - as his hands are forced upwards to catch and brace himself against the wall - framed around meaty shoulders and oh fuck. there’s the squeeze. light but undeniable.
“is okay, shane,” ilya teases from behind, and shane would glean even a little bit of comfort from it if he didn’t sound so smug. “cliff…he is very close. he knows things, yes?”
shane could laugh or cry or both. “things…”
“yes,” he nods. “things about you.” from behind, ilya’s palms plant on shane’s bare waist and start traveling upward. “things you need to feel nice in your body.”
what he’s talking about is as obvious as shane’s fight-or-flight visibly kicking in. it’s the same way the air leaves his lungs in a flustered breath as ilya sways them all together for one blissful moment, shane lighting up head to toe from the short taste of deep pressure.
it’s…
oh god…
shane’s eyes flutter closed, and he wishes it was only because he can’t take marleau’s face this close up anymore. that cool, easy stare down at him even as he sets his beer on the bar... that fucking jawline, cut sharp beneath full, jetblack stubble... another sway - this time forward, something deep in shane's muscles trying to release in recognition of delicious compression.
“feels good, mm…?” ilya’s voice tickles at the shell of his ear. lower now. “you can tell him, shane…”
he can’t. that’s the fucking problem. he can stand here and let loose every unconventional thing that makes his brain spark and body feel grounded and ilya will make him feel absolutely gorgeous for it. but then marleau will know. and eventually he’ll know it isn’t just the brain spark. he’ll know it’s more than that. when it isn’t always. which means marleau will know that he, specifically, plays a role in that and-
“i don’t-…” shane huffs, forcing his eyes open again, hands planted on the wall. “we shouldn’t.” and why does that send out a ripple of arousal all on its own? jesus, he really is fucked up. “we shouldn’t-…do this.”
the hands on his waist give him a firm squeeze. “what are we doing?” playing with his food. their food. “marly, it looks like we’re doing something?”
“looks like we’re standin’ here…” comes his answer, cool as ever. like they're not seconds away from giving shane exactly what he wants, if he just asks for it.
or-... no. shane doesn't want it. he does, really fucking badly, but he already knows he won't be able to stop when he needs to. that undefinable slip from body-affirming pressure to an aching dick - he couldn't catch it at the club, so why the hell would he be able to here? shirtless and in marleau's sexy fucking remodeled bar?
and yet...
"shane..." ilya says again in his ear, an angel and a demon all in one. "...you want...?" he knows him so well. can read him just by feeling him, without even seeing his face. he knows shane. what he needs. and...
shane swallows, eyes downcast.
and then microscopically, he nods.
there's an immediate thrill in the confirmation. a release of its own, something bubbling up dangerously in shane's chest that he writes off as anticipation. and all it does is make him want to squirm out of his skin as he waits for ilya to say it, head tilting to look at marleau past his shoulder.
"stay there. keep him still."
“you got it brother,” he hears and then ilya doesn’t make him wait. he gives it to him right away, planting shane between the two of them and kissing the back of his neck as he leans his weight into them and oh…
shane exhales shakily. his eyes immediately slam shut, nothing else getting in except for the absolutely delicious pressure driving into him and keeping him smothered.
he doesn’t mean for the tiny grunt to slip out, but it does. and they can both hear it. although it’s nothing ilya hasn’t forced out of him a thousand times.
“mhm…” his weight leans off just a bit and shane’s body rushes with displaced energy - an uncomfortable shudder working up his spine until- ah…yes…it’s back… “better, yes…?”
it is. right away.
shane wets his bottom lip and drags it between his teeth and doesn’t open his eyes. just accepts the compression. the squeeze.
ilya's hands on his waist. his breath on his neck. "we should keep going..." it isn't a question.
shane doesn't need to nod.
but he does.
a second off to decompress, and then ilya's leaning in and up, practically lifting shane off his feet with another punched out breath that huffs into a hitched groan. it squishes him so perfectly against marleau's chest that he thinks he might die. thinks he's okay with that. thinks they'll have a really interesting time wording this in his obituary. willingly panini-pressed to death between two of the hottest players in the MLH.
the thought has a delirious little smile lifting to his parted lips, and in the tight space there's no way it goes unnoticed.
"oh he's lovin' it..."
marleau's voice is so close. mere inches away if he opens his eyes. shane could really freak out, but the rest of his body is so wrapped up in catharsis that all he can do is tip his head back, ilya's lips finding his temple just like he hoped it would. "fuck..."
"is like deep tissue massage for him," he hears him explain, and it doesn't sound like it's the first time. "big hug..." another kiss to the side of his head, "but better, yes?"
shane swallows and keeps it tilted back as he wets his lips again. "you could-..." a shudder runs through his core but it's good this time, "...you can go harder..." he can take it. ilya knows he can take it. he knows he needs it rough.
the pressure releases, ilya's hands snaking up his sides and on top of his braced arms, feeling the muscles there. "marly will help...since you want him to so bad..."
and shane doesn't super understand what that means but he digs his feet in anyway. tries to fight down the squirm between their bodies, his chest and back already slick with sweat and-
the pressure comes from both sides this time - ilya's bodyweight and marleau's huge fucking arms wrapping around to bring them both in and fuuuck, fuck fuck...
shane's eyes squeeze shut like he's afraid he might pop. fingertips scratch over the wall as his hands ball into fists, endorphins and steady satisfaction flooding his muscles as the deep pressure holds. oh god it's good... it's good...
"that it...?"
ilya's answering for him and it's somehow both right up in his ear and three rooms away. "good, marly. stay. i tell you when..."
forever, hopefully. shane wants to stay like this forever, even if he can't breath so well. wants to be eternally crushed between them, no more space for his doubts to wiggle free. just this. affirming, grounding pressure. his lips moving around a 'fuck' that never sees the light of day.
"okay."
he's not sure how much time passes before ilya's calling it, but when the arms drop and his weight eases off just enough, shane's body sort of slumps over, his face falling to press into the warm, muffling cotton of marleau's chest. "oh my fucking god..."
it's not funny necessarily, so he's not sure why both of them are laughing at him but it's in a comradery sort of way. he thinks. whatever, he feels so good right now that he doesn't give a shit.
behind him, ilya brings them all into a slow little sway. it's barely anything, just a subtle shift from foot to foot. even so, shane finds himself willingly swept away in it, snug as hell with his husband fit all along his back. marleau's a fucking tower of heat and muscle to sink into so he does, breathing in a blissful lungful as they slowly drift.
wow...he smells good...
just behind, ilya murmurs something that isn't for him and he misses it anyway. wants to know. lifts his head from marleau's chest and tries to glance back at him with a nosy, "what...?"
his voice breaks. embarrassingly. or maybe not - he's kind of floating right now.
"i said you are sweet like this," comes ilya's crooning voice. "all pink and happy. very pretty for us, right marly?"
and you know what? he's maybe backtracking on that 'not being embarrassed' thing. especially when marleau hums, deep and rumbling against shane's sweaty palms. "got yourself a fuckin' doll here, roz..."
and...
when did shane drop his hands from the wall...? how long has he been grabbing up on marleau's chest like this, wishing he would take his shirt off...?
the strange dread of unfortunate reality comes creeping back into shane's body as he opens his eyes, meeting the knowing gaze of his husband a breath away.
ah. shit.
immediately, shane unwedges his hands to drop them to his sides. forces his head forward again. becomes aware of the sweat keeping him hot and bothered against ilya's bare chest.
"i uh..." his voice is as heavy as ever. like his lungs are still trying to get enough air back in them after being compressed. "we should-..." oh no...
the swaying continues, ilya's nose nudging at the sensitive spot beneath his ear. "mm...?"
it sends a giddy little shudder down his spine that melts right between his legs. and all at once, shane can feel himself freezing up, every other point in his body zeroing in where his cock pulses against marleau's lap, thick and needy.
he's-...
oh god, shane's hard.
"let's stop," he forces out and it's still so winded. "we should-...we can stop now..."
"stop...?" ilya echoes and there's a very specific layer of tease in his tone. like he couldn't possibly understand what shane's talking about, even though he damn well does. motherfucker.
pressed against his front, marleau isn't any better. “you know somethin’ we don’t know, hollywood?”
shane lets out a huff of disbelief. the asshole - there's no way he doesn't feel it, right? “fuck off…” but then ilya presses forward again and it drags a heavy breath from his mouth and across marleau's, shaky and unmistakable and oh god he's in danger.
in the thin space, marleau looks down at him with lidded eyes and lifted brows. just way too fucking close. “think he knows something we don’t know,” he confirms to ilya. “might need to hit ‘em again.”
the next logical step is an attempted retreat into his husband. shane presses back as much as he can, if only for a little space between marleau's lap and his aching dick and- "hold him for me," ilya says anyway. a traitor. "keep him still."
and then he's surging himself forward and grinding shane right up into marleau's body in the tightest, firmest hold so far and shane groans. holy fuck, he groans. just out in the fucking open.
"there it is," marleau grins. like he doesn't care that shane's completely bricked up against him. like this is all normal. the trapping and the crushing and the- "he could go tighter, i bet."
"yeah," shane hears and then realizes it's his voice. it's him who's saying it, coaxed by the surprising rush of everyone just going along with his fucked up desires. because shit, if they're gonna do it... "yeah... come on..." so many different flavors of pleasure are popping and pooling and heating inside him and ilya puts his fucking back into it, his weight crushing into shane tighter and tighter and oh-...shit, "right there..." that's fucking perfect. "right there, ilya." fuck.
the squeeze stays firm and shane's brows furrow in what he can only describe as just short of agony. beautifully so. especially as ilya pumps forward just a little more and the air punches out of his lungs in a literal wheeze, the end of it fluttering into an impossibly pleased laugh. "oh-ho-ho fuck..."
"listen to that... fuckin' loves it..."
"mm, yes..." there's labor in ilya's voice. proof of the effort he's putting in to keep shane compressed in just the way he needs. "takes it very well...like everything i give him..."
the compliment goes straight to shane's dick and gets it throbbing. his body is so centered and grounded and whole that he can't even help but rut up in the already packed space. and suddenly it's not such a problem that it happens to be on ilya's best friend.
or...maybe it's not a problem for shane.
"uh oh, rozy. looks like you were right..."
there's not enough time to translate that before ilya's weight is releasing from him with a rush of breath out, just enough space opening that he can bully an arm between shane and marleau's bodies and grab a feel right between shane's legs and- "oh fuck...jesus..."
"do not blame him, marly," he insists, "my shane is very needy. so hard to control himself sometimes..." as he speaks, he continues to rub shane's hard dick through his trunks, like he's just something to be played with. like shane's a puppy and ilya's apologizing for him peeing on the floor or something. the thought alone would be enough to make him shoot off if he wasn't so pleasantly held in his own body right now. "give him to me..."
the shift feels like a tailspin after being vacuum-sealed to marleau's front, but when he comes face to face with his husband again, all shane can do is let the fuzzy little grin slip over his face. "hi..."
he might be a little further along than he realized.
"hi," ilya humors him, handsome and sweaty and dangerously within kissing range. "take big, big breath for me."
shane swallows, eyes trailing back up from those lips as he does just that and then-
"huuuhhh," gets forced out of his mouth as ilya pushes his weight into him, effectively flattening him straight into marleau from the front this time.
shane's eyes roll shut in deep satisfaction. head hangs forward, heavy and leaning against ilya's forehead so they can share his shaky breath. jesus christ, that's it. "ilya..."
"mhm..."
delicious compression. unfamiliar hands grabbing at his deltoids just like they did at the club but this time, they smooth down his arms from behind. they hang onto his wrists, tugging them forward until shane’s holding onto ilya’s waist. yes. good. fucking perfect idea.
there's no more space to give, but shane tries to pull ilya in by the hips anyway. tries to grind himself there - right against ilya's lap - flooding himself with hot, tingly pleasure and a strangled moan. "baby..."
"god damn, rozanov," marleau says from behind and shane can't take it anymore.
he rocks forward, chasing after the pleasure as best as he can. it's got his head swimming and his muscles rejoicing and ilya's been slowly leaning off so he can force one foot forward, his thick thigh slotting between shane's legs so he can hump it and jesus, it's hot. absolutely delicious. and now he just needs to be crushed. "don't stop... guys..."
and they don't. ilya uses the new leverage to press in deep. the rest is picked up by marleau, who once again wrangles his arms around both of them and squeezes tight enough to knock the wind from their lungs and-
shane's face scrunches from the pressure, cheeks red, forehead sweaty. he ruts up against ilya's thigh and very quickly realizes that means he's grinding back on marleau's dick and it's so much. it's so fucking much. "fuck-...we should-...i'm getting close..."
he doesn't even know if he's allowed to say it out loud. because maybe this has all been a fever dream and them taking pity on him and shane actually saying it out loud is gonna burst the bubble but he can feel it, his orgasm spreading and pooling in the solid, fully recognized center of him.
marleau's breath is warm and almost wet against shane's neck, even as he taunts him. "he gonna blow?"
even as ilya locks in, pushing up into shane the extra painful inch with a labored, "mhm," and then-
shane moans, brows furrowing now. body caught and kept and his head falls forward anyway, both arms wrapping desperately around ilya's waist as he humps his leg - as he grinds back on marleau's cock. christ, if they were naked right now he'd be- "jesus-...fuck i'm gonna cum-"
"yes, shane," ilya coos in his ear, "show him, sweetheart," and it's all over. pleasure rips through shane's body and forces its way out of his mouth, his teeth biting into the meat of ilya's bare shoulder as he cums in his swim shorts.
it's a good thing he's caught between the two of them because if he wasn't, his ass would be on the floor right now, legs immediately going to jelly. "ohmygod..." holy-... "ohmy...fucking god..."
ilya allows all the little twitches against him. stays strong and steady, his hand clamping around the back of shane's neck to keep him pressed down. "good... good job..." heavy breaths...his, and shane's, and marleau's just behind. "tight still or space, my shane...?"
another shudder works through shane's core. an aftershock, from his toes to the top of his head. he has no earthly idea what he wants right now and kind of fucking loves that. "yeah..."
his answer has ilya huffing a chuckle from his nose, patting the back of shane's neck a few times in amusement. "okay..."
behind him, marleau stays this solid figure. steady. strangely trustworthy.
shane tries not to think about the shape of his hard cock pressing against his ass.
and...okay, maybe that space is as good idea.
with a grunt of satisfaction, shane insists himself forward, the brunt of his weight held up now by his husband as he seems to get with the program and takes full charge.
he loses a little time with it and maybe it's the post-nut dopamine flow. maybe it's the feeling of deep, deep fulfillment in his chronically flighty muscle mass. but an itch has been scratched and then some, his brain finally catching up to ilya and cliff's murmuring when a clap cracks between them, shattering the quickly cooling air.
what the fuck. "ilya...please don't dap him up for this..."
there's cum drying in the webbing of his swim trunks, for fuck's sake.
his husband seems more focused on formalities. "say thank you, sweetheart."
it's a bit of a strange request, all things considered. but he can't deny a job well done when he sees one. he knew cliff marleau could crack him like a glow stick, and jesus christ did he deliver.
in the flowy aftermath, shane still hasn't looked the other man in the eye. which could mean nothing. but, "thanks, marleau..."
"anytime, hollywood," comes the answer and it sounds like he means it. which could mean nothing as well.
"your guest room...we will be using it if this is okay, marly. my shane needs time to...hm..." he's looking for the word. whichever one he lands on is going to be embarrassing as hell.
but marleau seems to pick up what he's putting down with ease, the smell of his cologne wafting close as he must pass by. "knock your socks off, big dog."
it's got a flutter of something plucking up in shane's chest. sends a little jolt to his dick, far too late for an aftershock.
whatever. all shane needs right now is a shower and his husband, already looking forward to the feeling of ilya's perfect body slinking on top and staying over him when the lay down, pressing him flat into the guest bed.
the fact that cliff marleau will still be somewhere close by? well, that'll have absolutely no impact on shane at all. surely.
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continuation of this short post where shane tipsily contemplates getting squished between ilya and marleau’s sweaty bodies <3
it’s been several months and shane isn’t even thinking anymore about getting panini-pressed between his husband and his husband’s bro-y best friend. it was buzzy and fun and ilya teasing him about it while they fucked afterwards was kinda hot but he’s done with all that now.
that’s the plan, at least, until he finds himself in a club. finds himself a little drunker than he intended. finds himself on the dance floor, ilya guiding him with long, sexy movements that keep them pressed together so nicely, chest to chest. it’s less dancing, to be honest, and more swaying. taking stock of each other’s bodies and following the ebb and flow of them. and shane is drunk and happy and a little turned on by his smoking hot husband so that’s why he reacts the way he does when it happens. when they’re suddenly not alone.
shane is perhaps hyperaware of cliff marleau’s presence tonight, but only in the way that ilya hasn’t gotten to see him in such a long time. it’s a reunion of sorts. so vibes are up. his husband’s happy and that makes shane happy, his slightly swimming brain latching onto the endorphins that spike around marleau like they’re his own.
it’s why his body reacts the way it does when one moment, things are footloose and fancy free, and then the next, there’s this solid, hulking weight settling behind him, not touching but unmistakably there. it’s marleau’s deep voice. marleau’s woodsy cologne. marleau’s heat, hovering just shy of shane’s back as he leans over his shoulder to shout something at ilya.
it’s loud as fuck in here, the bass sitting low in shane’s chest, so he really does mean shout. but ilya leans in a bit to catch his words. seamlessly. they’ve done this so many times, shane assumes, finding each other in clubs after inevitably splitting up. and that’s fine. that’s good. ilya’s laughing and he’s happy and that makes shane happy. and then the crowd moves.
it’s light - a ripple effect as a group of girls make their way through the sea of bodies - but it’s just enough, that adrenaline spiking with a top-off of sweet endorphins as suddenly, marleau’s body sinks in to press all along shane’s back.
it’s nothing. an accident. and yet shane’s heart suddenly bunny-kicks in his chest, the light squeeze of him caught between ilya and marleau’s chests sending a pulse of satisfied heat through his core. because neither of them are moving away. there’s a natural sway to them that comes from being in a crowd of bodies, but the extra space must’ve never freed up behind marleau after the girls passed. and all of the sudden shane’s brain and dick register that he’s stuck. that he’s squished, by firm muscles, from all sides.
he’s been in this position before. on a dance floor like this. rose kissing him, miles’s lips not so secretly brushing against the back of his neck. it’s not a new position, but tonight is nothing like that. right now, there’s nothing remotely sexual even happening. it’s just ilya talking to his friend. just having a moment. casual and circumstantial and yet shane’s skin is on fire. his muscles are screaming with relief, the beautiful satisfaction of the deep pressure surrounding him making his brain swim down deep.
ilya shouts something back to marleau with a devastatingly handsome smile. it gets both hands reaching over shane’s shoulders to give ilya’s a friendly rub and it’s too loud to catch. all shane knows is they’re both laughing now. they’re like boys again - a revisit to their clubrat days and they’re just as smooth and sexy but they’re mature now. stable. and shane is ilya’s, those big hands on his hips now that marleau’s snug against his back. there’s no room to actually dance and shane’s finding he couldn’t be happier about that, pulse thick and thundering in his ears as another wave presses in, marleau’s touch dropping back to clamp over shane’s deltoids as he’s forced to press forward again - so fucking tightly into him this time that shane stumbles that last half a step into ilya’s chest and fuck.
shane’s eyes flutter closed. hands fall to clutch into the back of ilya’s tank top. his dick jumps in his jeans as the heady pressure squeezing around him tightens. neither of the men seem to care that marleau’s all up on shane and maybe that’s normal. maybe that’s just the way the club scene is. you get cozy and flush against your best friend’s partner and no one bats an eye because it doesn’t mean anything. it’s just a spacing issue.
maybe shane’s the freak.
because he’s trying not to, but he can feel himself getting hard. he can hear all that teasing that poured from his husband’s lips after he admitted to hypothetically wanting this around that fire pit. the pressure. the trap. with this man specifically.
marleau leans his head back for a second and his warm breath fans against the nape of shane’s neck and suddenly, like a demon has possessed him, it’s taking everything in shane’s power not to back his ass up into marleau’s lap. to grind against him a little. just to see. god, he’s drunk. he needs ilya to take him home and fuck him. he needs to stay right here and live out his days crushed between these two sweaty bodies, their colognes mixing into this insane aroma that gets in shane’s head and makes him wanna do something crazy.
he just needs to recenter. steady his pulse. enjoy the pressure without equating it to something filthy, like he can usually do so well, but for some reason is struggling hard as hell with right now.
shane rests his chin over ilya’s shoulder with a hum. closes his eyes. remembers himself and where he is and opens them back up, making eye contact with a twink who’s watching him with what can only be described as biblical proportions of envy.
they need to leave. before shane does something stupid. before he ruins a friendship that’s been in the works for over a decade because he’s drunk and horny and can’t control himself.
shane lifts his head to brush his lips against ilya’s ear, but before he can ask, something happens behind them. whatever it is, it’s got marleau’s lap pressing up flush against his ass and god, it sends this buzzy pleasure through him so, so deeply and the noise escapes shane before he can reel it in. before he can act like he’s normal and not very obviously so fucking turned on between them.
he can feel ilya’s chest rumble. hear the smirk that’s dancing across his lips as he noses his way over to shane’s ear instead.
“soon,” he murmurs, and shane has no way of knowing how his eyes flick up to snag on marleau over his shoulder. “let us play with you a little longer.”
out and married hollanov having drinks at a non-hockey friend's house. maybe shane's old stylist who he really got along with and then her friend group absorbed him, which in turn meant they absorbed ilya.
anyway they're all sitting around a fire pit having cunty little cocktails or smth and just enough has been consumed that the convo turns scandalous. someone (we'll say his stylist) is waxing poetic about her gorgeous new fwb and their equally gorgeous friend and says "that's a sandwich i'd love to be the jelly in."
and shane - tipsy but ever present - his ears sort of perk up puppy style across the fire like, "sandwich...?"
which inspires this whole conversation about handsy threesomes. and shane's gonna be honest, in theory that sounds hot. he's had his fair share of late-night jerk offs around the idea, don't get him wrong. but he's got ilya locked down - he's not sniffing around for a third. the concept, however...the physical sensation of being caught between two hot sweaty dudes? yeah that's juuuust enough to get him zoning out into the fire, tipsy mind having a field day filled with sweaty muscles and tight, delicious pressure crowding him in on all sides.
ilya recognizes this look in an instant, of course. he's sitting right next to him after all. "making your imaginary sandwich in front of your husband..." he tsks, but it's all in good fun. he's obviously very interested, just like everyone else who has tuned into the convo because shane's kinda-
"panini..."
"what?"
"meat in a panini," he drowsily explains, in what he thinks is a perfect and impressively cohesive explanation of the image in his head right now. "absolutely fuckin' crushed..."
ilya can't even pretend to be surprised because he knows his man. and his needs. and his frequent desires to be smashed into oblivion under ilya's full weight. not even fucking him, most times. just squeezing him. pressure for pressure's sake. "ah... of course." this makes perfect sense. even if the rest of the group doesn't seem to be following. "and who is bread for your meat, my panini?"
that gets a couple giggles, but shane is fucking locked in, brother. like he's making plans already. "well you, obviously."
"obviously." okay thank god. "and who else?" he's reaching out to run his fingers through the back of his husband's hair while he speaks. "who will help me keep you still? maybe bood would if we-"
"marleau."
ilya pauses. blinks. "what?"
"cliff marleau," shane says. as if ilya is seeking clarification on which marleau is being discussed and like-...
ilya tilts his head and it's a little judgy. he knows. like the careful tone he carries with what he says next but like...hello? "sweetheart, cliff marleau fractured your collarbone and put you in hospital..."
and shane, god love him, he's just sitting there with this dreamy, almost blissed out haze over his eyes as his mind wanders. "exaaactly..."
The tuna meltdown scene was probably one of the first times in their relationship where ilya needed aftercare. That boy is in a daze, seeking comfort and kisses. He subconsciously follows Shane's body as he's getting off the couch before he realizes what's happening. He just needed to stay and hold Shane in his lap for a couple of minutes!!!!
ilya makes shane smile in that way where only the very corner of one side of his mouth twitches and turns up, the really sweet one when paired with his gentle eyes, and ilya reaches out and touches his thumb to that spot, says, "mine".
shane raises his eyebrows. "what?"
"this," ilya says, moving his thumb back and forth. "when this goes up. is mine."
"oh you're claiming my smiles now?"
"yes. also this—" ilya seeks out and pokes a spot high on shane's right cheek, "—this freckle."
"mmm, okay. anything else?"
ilya makes an 'I'm thinking' face. "probably. but I cannot think of anything now. I will get back to you on this," said in the tone shane reads his emails in. shane smiles fully and leans in. ilya copies him till they're nose to nose. brushing.
"well you don't have to think about it," shane says, "because it's all yours."
ilya asks, "what is?"
"me." shane puts his arms around ilya's neck, tilts his head, says into ilya's lips, "I'm all yours."
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Ilya 'Shithead Little Brother Of All Time' Rozanov is tragically in love with Shane 'Beloved Only Child' Hollander, who spends a decade thinking his situationship means everything he says
I think that the fandom heard through the grapevine that Ilya "admits" that Shane is the better player in TLG and people who have never read the books have run with that a little too far. For clarity's sake:
Ilya does say that Shane is better...one (1) time. He doesn't say it in public, and he doesn't say it gleefully or gladly or proudly. It's not a happy moment. It is, in fact, kind of tense and awkward.
Ilya says it after (A) Shane beats him by 0.13 seconds in the speed skating competition (so, to be clear, Ilya is not lying when he points out that this is basically a tie; it genuinely is very close) at All-Stars 2021, and (B) he has a kind of upsetting conversation with Scott wherein Scott jokes that the Centaurs are still nothing despite their recent success, specifically compared to Montreal of all teams, and also wherein Ilya asks Scott about gay married life without being able to tell Scott that he himself is about to get gay (bisexual) married. IMO it's heavily implied by these two events occurring back-to-back that Ilya is experiencing a depressive comedown from the highs of getting proposed to and going on a winstreak. This is RR's (admittedly kind of clumsy) way of showing that Ilya's depression isn't magically cured by The Power Of Love, and that all of Shane and Ilya's problems aren't solved by the proposal. Ilya experiences a high (proposal, winstreak) and then gets "slapped down" (losing the All-Stars comp, Scott jokes that the Centaurs' recent success means nothing, relationship is still a secret for now) and feels bad again.
Ilya sort of sneaks it in (he says "Can I tell you a secret?") while he and Shane are having sex, specifically while Shane is facing away from him and ~distracted~. Again, it's not something that he's announcing loud and proud. He can't even say it to Shane's face.
SHANE PROTESTS. MULTIPLE TIMES. Despite being distracted and clearly unable to think straight, Shane is confused and kind of alarmed: "God, why was Ilya saying this? Did he really think so? Did it matter?" (Immediately after asking if it matters, he protests again, thus answering his own question; it clearly matters to Shane.) This is not something that Shane considers accurate.
The whole point of Ilya saying that Shane is better is that it's jarringly out of character and not really based on anything. Ilya says it because Shane beat him one time by a single tenth of a second in a skill that, Ilya mentions earlier, Ilya is usually better at (i.e., this is not a representative result). When he tries to double down, he says that Shane was always the better player, which is just straight-up demonstrably untrue; Rachel Reid was really, really deliberate in balancing Shane and Ilya's accolades in Heated Rivalry, so we can be pretty damn sure that Shane and Ilya were equals pre-Ottawa move, at least. Ilya is for sure wrong when he tries to say that Shane was always better, if nothing else.
SHANE DOUBLES DOWN ON PROTESTING. He insists that they're tied, and Ilya agrees. Conversation ends (or, rather, shifts to the "Marlow almost hears them" smut lmao).
Takeaways:
Ilya saying that Shane is better probably has more to do with his depression than it does with reality. We are given no indication that this is a true and objective fact. It falls in line with Ilya's other depression-related self-worth issues in thinking that he's a bad partner/friend/teammate/captain, which we know are false.
Ilya does not and probably would not ever say this loudly, publicly, or proudly. This is a shameful thing for Ilya, who relishes competition and --- before the worst of his depression --- used to be incredibly self-confident about his hockey skills. It isn't #goals or "WAG Ilya" behavior.
Shane absolutely does not accept Ilya saying this passively. He believes firmly that they're equals and simply Will Not Let It Go. Even if Ilya did for some reason assert publicly that Shane was better, Shane would absolutely not let that stand. He would probably actively disagree.
IIRC, no other character ever agrees with this take. There's no widespread belief or opinion amongst unbiased characters that Shane is a better player than Ilya. It's not an objective fact or common opinion.
"Shane and Ilya are equals" is literally the entire premise of their relationship. Their original book is called Heated Rivalry. The fact that Ilya is unable to believe in the fundamental premise of their love and the thing that brought he and Shane together is SAD, y'all. The man is depressed.
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Do you guys think if Shane hadn’t introduced himself to Ilya, that the first time they played each other (pre-draft) Shane’s first impression of Ilya being a jerk on the ice would’ve changed the trajectory of Shane’s career, or Ilya notice Shane (maybe when they’re shaking hands) and the commercial would’ve still happened?
Because there’s a part of me that thinks that no intro between them would make Shane be part of the rivalry like how the league painted them to the world, and beat Ilya for more awards, because his first impression of Ilya was him being a complete jerk and being a really good player simultaneously. Maybe this would evoke Shane to have made it his goal to get 51 goals in his rookie season (but never say this to the public, because he didn’t want to come off cocky) or win more Stanley cups, and have been extremely upset when Ilya wins with Boston.
But I also think that Ilya would’ve noticed Shane at some point, at least to a certain extent, and not need the one-on-one/introduction with Shane at the beginning to make a move on him. Maybe the beginning of their relationship would’ve been a bit different, at the most.
But there’s also a third possibility I thought of, which is a rivals-with-benefits-to-lovers Hollanov where Shane is very public about how competitive he makes himself with Ilya, and because it’s great publicity for a new rivalry in the league, they ask for a commercial of the 2 of them. Ilya, who thinks Shane’s attitude is hot, though, still hits on Shane, and from there they still do their hookups like in the book/show, it just takes somewhat of a different path. I feel like it would even highlight Shane’s coming out more, because just-because-he-was-hooking-up-with-Rozanov-and-only-Rozanov-for-years-doesn’t-mean-oh-shit.
Or do you think there’s simply no universe in which Shane Hollander wouldn’t introduce himself to Ilya.
gummygunk
yousharknotpass
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