Warnings: 18+, mature themes, violence, possessiveness. Choso x reader, top choso, modern au, college au, drug use/drinking, drunk sex, pining, kissing, sexting, oral, teasing, panty stealing freak choso, slowburn, obsession, slight plug!choso, tags to be disclosed…
Summary:
They live together. Nothing complicated, yet - just friends, shared space, and unspoken rules.
But when she starts drawing the wrong kind of attention, the lines blur and deep internal feelings burn. Jealousy creeps in where it doesn't belong, protectiveness sharpens into something dangerous, and feelings no one is ready to name begin to surface. What starts as harmless proximity turns into a test of restraint and of how far friendship can bend before it breaks.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Synopsis. On campus? Choso Kamo’s the sweet, shy nerd you share film class with - the one who can barely meet your eyes without blushing. Online? Choso Kamo is really @cursed(your)wombz—the #1 streamer on C4mBoyfriends with 820k followers to see his…nine inches. And he might just be looking for a partner.
Pairing. Choso Kamo x Reader
Content. MDNI, fem!reader, streamer!Choso, (sort of) B́J Alex AU, cámboy!Choso, college AU, he’s a nerd, film nerd!Choso, secret identities, masks, píercings (ears, tóngue, D), tattoos, chat, streaming, you’re a fan, identity reveal, exhíbitíonism, oraI (fem rec.), again PlERCINGS, tongue f, spítting, p sIapping, p talking, letting the viewers choose, fíngering with rings, overstím, dúmbifícation, Jacob’s Ladder, rough s, fiIthy s, he’s sIightly mean, tummy buIges, making it fit, pressing down, talking you through it, cIit pinching, pússydrúnk Choso, matíng presses, chokíng, manhandIing, mocking, sIight níppIe stim, creampíes, chat Iove you, cúmpIay, getting together, Phantom of the Opera references, pet names, swéaring.
Word count. 14.9k
A/N. Hehehehehe-
Sunday was the night you’d found him; sprawled out on your bed and thumbing through the Internet. Some glitzy pop song you couldn’t name blasted from your speakers, and the room was saturated in the tingly excitement of having speedy Wi-Fi, no assignments, and the night to yourself. LED lights pink.
You’re checking some of your messages - doling out a few hearts, a few reposts - when that bell-shaped button bursts in blue. A new notification.
@cursed(your)wombz liked your repost.
It was on a photograph of the Sun—big and yellow, seemingly melting over a grey horizon.
Which was perfectly ordinary- this was the Internet, after all. And though your list of followers was modest, of course you’d interact with a stranger here and there.
The problem was in the way the notification disappeared as soon as it came.
An…accident maybe? This person had liked and unliked your repost. And without a second thought, you’re typing their username into the search bar.
And clicking on their profile.
@cursed(your)wombz huh?
He had a pitch-black profile picture and a layout with nothing of note, a banner as equally colorless and unnotable, and a simple bio stating:
I know what you want…
- C.
And beneath that was a link.
It stood out stark against the black background. You don’t click on it, of course- for fear of being something malicious, you’re avoiding it like you’d avoid a minefield.
You’ve already heard one too many horror stories on here about such things. One click and you’d find your address posted somewhere. Instead, your eyes drop to the number of followers he had…and your eyebrows are immediately shooting up.
0 Following.
581k Followers.
Now that makes you blink.
Okay- alright, maybe it wasn’t the most astounding number you’ve ever seen throughout your expansive time on the Internet - but it was still niche celebrity-status. Especially on this app. Especially to be stalking an account like yours…where all you did was repost the stray picture of a pretty landscape or yell into the aether about your missing assignments for your friends to comment on.
Now that was a little strange.
And so you’re scrolling down.
And you never quite know what you’re in for whenever you enter the realm of a person’s account—fanfiction with tags you never knew existed, one part of an argument on social media that really shouldn’t exist, mpreg.
Which was all fine and dandy to be quite honest- you just never expect to be met with the most beautiful man you’ve ever laid eyes on.
The first picture you’re seeing- pinned.
Posted just an hour ago. It’s a mirror selfie taken at a low angle; of a man with his body angled towards the lens and his phone covering his face. In nothing but a towel. With nothing but his chiselled body. His beefy arms flexed as he takes the picture, biceps rippled with a few veins—though still lean and almost smooth to the touch. Pierced nipples. Defined abs. Your eyes linger on the sparse dusting of dark hair leading below, below, below his fluffy white towel…
The picture cuts off just a few inches past his navel. You know because you’re enlarging it.
The photo is almost vampiric in nature.
Somehow.
Dimly-lit. Beautiful—he clearly knew his angles and lighting. It’s slightly blurry and you can’t make out much of the man’s features - nothing more than the slender length of his fingers, silver rings, and the outline of his dark (perhaps brown?) hair. Touching his shoulders. From just above the hem of his towel, the amorphous blur of a tattoo snakes down his left v-line - and no matter how much you’re zooming in, you can’t quite figure out what it is.
Something twists at the pit of your stomach as you’re latching your eyes onto the very obvious bulge he was sporting through the towel - very.
The flash created a shadow of his lengthy cock—oh. Hanging between thick thighs, heavy and needy. And it also illuminated the slight dampness clinging onto his body; perhaps he’d just gotten out of the shower, or was about to take on after a workout.
Whichever scenario it was, both made your thighs clench- fuck.
Fingers slightly shaky, you’re exiting out of the picture and scrolling down for more.
The next post is a video seemingly taken from the very same instance: it was from the point of view of the beautiful man. Facing downwards, as he zoomed the camera in on his bulge and ran one vein-covered, ringed hand down his abs- down his pelvis- down to that throbbing erection and squeezed himself through his towel.
And then through your speakers echoes out the most pornographic moan.
Thank goodness your dorm had thick walls.
And that’s when you decide that you’ve seen enough.
Not enough as in enough enough to block this strange man and move on with your life- of course, not. As quickly as your fingers would possibly let you, you’re exiting out of the video and scrolling up to a bio that seemed to have more to hide than the first time you read through it.
The link stands mockingly stark - almost winking at you - against the dark background. You think you know what it is.
And you click on it.
Suddenly, your laptop screen’s flooding with a gaudy pink color. A loading circle swivels in the middle of it for a few seconds, before you’re met with a logo in swooping, slanted black script: C4mBoyfriends. Better than that boy in your dms.
Rapidly, you’re opening up a new tab and typing in the name.
“C4mBoyfriends is an adult streaming platform that hosts webcam performers that choose to label themselves as male. Here they can stream live video, post photographs, and interact on forums with a wide array of paying viewers—for a range of content catering to specific niches or sexual roleplays. C4mBoyfriends, since its recent launch, has shot up in the industry as one of the most-visited adult sites and the safest for its performers. All cuts go to the performers themselves and the site runs on separate donations from its audience.”
Ah- you’d guessed right.
Excitement burbles at the pit of your stomach for a few seconds. You’re clicking back onto the tab with the pink logo, and finding that it’d stopped loading.
It was in the layout of a streaming device, with static images of ongoing streams on one side of the platform, and different pages listed out on top. But what took up the majority of your screen was the vision of the very same man from before- from the mirror selfie, from the video.
This time, it was a stream.
@cursed(your)wombz is streaming—#1 streamer on C4mBoyfriends [101 week streak]. [Only solo]. Your internet boyfriend <3
0 Subscribed.
820k Subscribers.
455k Currently watching.
This time, he had his towel lifted up and his hands fisted around his fat cock.
Perfectly angled.
Your jaw drops. He was about eight- maybe more inches, though you weren’t in the state to count. Way too entranced by the way his veiny, ring-decorated hands were wrapped around his cock. Large. He was just so loooong and standing tall between wide-spread legs, shiverin’ every time he’s gliding his hand up and down. Up and down.
Again and again.
Getting faster by the second before he arches-
The edge of his thumb’s reaching for his ruby-red crown—then smearing the glistening liquid that just kept on foaming from the top. He lathers it upon his palm and drags it down his hot erection, making every inch gleam underneath the off-camera lighting.
You’re clicking on a button to increase your volume.
And just in time, too, because then he snakes his left hand down and squeezes his heavy balls- letting out a botched groan that leaves your shorts oh-so-wet.
Deep and guttural; there’s a slight quiver in them as he whispers. “F-fuck.” Just so full and sensitive—the man’s head tips backwards and his hips buck off the cushioned chair. Sluttily. As though he was fucking something invisible. It’s creaking ever-so-slightly as he settles back down, composing himself just a little bit before he starts cumming.
Pearly white droplets of cum.
Beading from the very top of his shaft - where he was the most pink n’ angry - shaking as he empties out. Globs of it start to glide down his length, and a few more collect where his silver Prince Albert’s piercing was positioned right beneath his mushroomy tip.
You’re just letting your eyes linger upon that little heap of satiny sap, when the man thumbs upwards and smears that, too. Such a mess.
And you think that might be all- but then he’s reaching his non-dominant hand upwards and pressing down on his frothing cockhead. Stopping himself from cumming - and as he leans to the side, you swear you’re glimpsing the twinkle of even more piercings on the upper side of his shaft. Was that…a Jacob’s ladder?
You’re rendered so damn speechless that you almost don’t register him speaking- “Awwww, did my pretty sluts wanna watch me cum?”
A shiver runs down your spine at the hitched tone of his voice- drunk on lust. He’s slightly slurring. So alluring, you almost catch yourself nodding.
“Well, too bad.” The man meanly snickers, before he’s suddenly reaching out with his non-dominant hand and angling it higher. The screen shifts to display that very same mouth-watering body from the picture—though, this time with the addition of a black-and-white mask that covered his features from forehead to his sharp jawline.
The only opening in it was a concave cutout for his mouth - almost reminiscent of a Phantom of the Opera mask. In the background was a clearly expensive bedroom of a clearly expensive home - far different from your single dorm - an artwork that you couldn’t name on the wall behind him. Something like a photograph or a portrait. Something about it was so precise- so cinematic. Like watching a movie scene. He continues, “Because you know why? You don’t deserve it.”
There’s a flurry of comments on one side of the screen, so fast that you wonder how he reads it.
“Didn’t I tell you to spam me with your nastiest stories in the chat?” He asks, and from beneath his mask you catch the outline of dark eyes shifting down those hurried words. Those needy comments. “None of you are nasty enough, so none of you get to see me cum…”
You’re tearing your eyes off of him to peruse what they were saying.
@girrrrrrrrrrth: nuuuuuu please, curse! i’ll get on my knees!!
@vampzo333: me too ME TOO
@likezmenpregnant: My story about the body pillow wasn’t nasty enough? TT
@CCpervnextdoor: AWWWW I’m begging~
@Curse’swifey: I’LL PAY YOU EXTRA PLEASEEEEEEE
@Curse’swifey donated 500 cherries.
“Tch- what a desperate bunch. Just fucking look at yourselves…” And though his words weren’t in the least bit nice, you couldn’t deny just how badly he made your cunt twinge.
Curse…that’s what his name was, huh?
You’re squeezing your thighs together- your sleep shorts were definitely soaked.
Curse rolls out the kinks in his neck just a little, and stares down at the camera with a crooked grin. “But that’s not gonna be enough. I said to be nasty- so be nasty.” The active chat becomes nothing but a blur once more: pleas, donations, stories half-typed in their urgency. “And in return I’ll moan whatever name you want me to moan when I cum.”
Before you know it, you’re opening up the sign-up page in a new tab.
Keeping Curse’s livestream playing in the background as you zip through your details. You’re picking out a username for yourself: Ietsmakeamovie and hastily going back to the ongoing stream with your newfound handle. Was it too obvious to make it the same username as your other account? The one that he had stalked?
Fuck- you’re too wound up to think of something else at this point. You decide that you’ll change it later…
Luckily, Curse’s stream didn’t have a paying threshold before you could comment. And you’re jittery with excitement as you pull the laptop closer to yourself and start typing out something—hitting send before you could overthink it.
@Ietsmakeamovie: Seeing you is the first time I’ve gotten this wet.
Curse’s eyes drift down the chat, and he seems to latch onto something. Eyes widening just a fraction.
“The first time?”
Fuck.
You’re feeling a jolt at the way he addresses you - never expecting him to pick out that comment amongst tens of thousands of others that were uttering even filthier things. Curse leans in and speaks with his deep tone, “Those other boys didn’t know how to treat a perfect pussy like yours, huh? This is why they call me the Internet boyfriend, baby.”
@Ietsmakeamovie: Yeah.
@Ietsmakeamovie: Fuck, you’re so hot.
@Ietsmakeamovie: I don’t even wanna look away to touch myself.
You feel embarrassed typing it all out - but you console yourself with the notion that no one here knows who you are. And you don’t know anyone here, either.
Curse leans back and starts pumping his cock even harder—taking his left hand off the drivelling top. His milky-white precum is frenzied n’ sticks to his hand like glue, and the chat grows more and more excited as Curse’s actions do the same.
“That’s alright, baby, you don’t have to finger yourself.” He chuckles, eyes locked on the comments. “I’d be doing that for you if I was there.”
@Ietsmakeamovie: Wish you were. You’d reach so much deeper.
@Ietsmakeamovie donated 1000 cherries.
“Fuh-fuck—” He hisses, head throwing back in his chair. You take the time to admire the lines of his prominent Adam’s apple - the way it bobs every time he’s taking a shaky swallow. “No need to donate or anything, baby, just keep- ngh, talking t’me like this and that’s enough…”
@0003h0lesforCurse: holy shit. i’ve never seen him like this.
@CCpervnextdoor: Needy Curse I like it~
@bewbsRlife: KEEP GOING OP KEEP GOING!!
You giggle to yourself.
@Ietsmakeamovie: Enough to make you cum, Curse?
“Greedy, greedy girl…” Through the slightest gaps in his mask you’re catching the way his nose crinkles in amusement. A wolfish smile. “S’that what you all want?”
The chat explodes in agreement.
He cocks his head, “Movie?”
Was that your new nickname now? Hastily, you reply-
@Ietsmakeamovie: Mhm.
“Well then…” He grins, toned body arching off the chair. “Get ready for a show—” Darkened gaze narrowing at the comments, “And you better not take your eyes off of me for a single second- hump your damn pillows if you have to. I don’t care.”
Quickly grabbing your own puffy pillow, you’re stuffing it between your legs.
Right as Curse lets his head loll backwards- and his cum drizzles out of his cock. He’s been edging the poor viewers and overstimulatin’ himself for so fucking long now—all it takes is a few pumps to let the cascade of white coat his hands and his rings. Just the slightest bit of silver peaking through.
Hard and fast.
The man’s cockhead flushes even redder as he drags his high out deliciously. Every burst of dopamine. Every heaving pant. Every pretty moan escaping him.
It seems to be ramming into him in waves- gooey ribbons of seed coat his digits. Getting smeared like a gloss across eeeeevery single inch, ridge, and vein—and since Curse’s pace was something furious, a few globs of cum splatter across the towel and onto his thighs. A mess that he’s seeming to love.
Because in the next few seconds, he’s wrung out just the final bits of pleasure in him- and is raising his cum-coated fingers up to his mouth and sucking. Staring straight into the camera lens as he does so.
You’re watching slack-jawed as those long, lacquered digits disappear between his lips. Finishin’ them off squeaky clean and letting his head tip to the side.
He mouths, “Movie—”
Part of your username.
Though you hadn’t asked for him to moan your name, as he’d promised to do to one of the viewers had they been nasty enough. And this special treatment…
Maybe he did it to every new viewer. Maybe he just liked how much you complimented him- though everyone else did, too. Either way, it’s perhaps what sets off the bursts of electricity between your legs—and soon enough you’re hurtling into a high you hadn’t even realized had been building up and up and up.
Your lashes flutter shut as the orgasm overtakes you.
Hips ruttin’ away into the plushness of your pillow- you wonder just how much better riding him would be…
And that’s setting off a whole new layer of dopamine at your core, your cunt quiverin’ as white-hot pleasure makes your heartbeat throb in your ears. Chest pounding. Breaths heavy.
By the time you’ve finished pushing through your high, you’re coming to find that Curse had somewhat cleaned himself up with the towel and was bantering back n’ forth with the chat. He rests his head on one hand and sweeps his eyes down the usernames, “What happened to dear Movie, huh?” Curse pretends to pout. “The first stream wasn’t too much for her, right?”
@girrrrrrrrrrth: kekekeke you’re too freaky, curse!!
@CCpervnextdoor: So dirty~
@daddytoeknee: Must thank Movie for the show though…
Urgently, you’re gathering yourself and tapping a few buttons on-screen.
@Ietsmakeamovie subscribed to @cursed(your)wombz.
@Ietsmakeamovie donated 2500 cherries.
@Ietsmakeamovie: It’d never be too much.
“Ahhh, there you are.” Such a beautiful smile smears across his face, and Curse’s leaning in to take a closer look at the comments. “And thank you for subscribing, same time tomorrow?”
You’re unsure whether that was directed at you or everyone viewing- but you’re chiming in agreement alongside the rest of the comments. And Curse reads through them, lingering for just a little while longer before he grins.
“Heh- bye, sluts.”
And he covers the camera, the stream cuts off.
Yet your heart still thunders.
Ignoring the time at the bottom of your laptop screen, you’re then clicking on his profile and scrolling through what other videos he had…
.
.
.
It was your fault that you kept dozing off.
Honestly.
You should have known better- and you know that you should’ve known better…but you couldn’t help yourself. After Curse’s initial stream, you spent some time browsing through the numerous photographs and short clips that he’d posted; there were even some saved streams that were each dirtier than the last—each with his attractive mask and his even more attractive voice, his sensual cock getting pumped over and over for the audiences.
And so you’d left a few comments, a few hearts.
Throughout all of them, you made the peculiar discovery that they were all more high-quality than the last. The standard of being the #1 on the site, you guess. But the lighting and angles were all just so perfect…
You’d watched them for just a little while- at least, what you’d thought was a little while. Because by the time you’re realizing that your laptop battery was dying, and your eyes were tired, you’re turning your head in the direction of the dorm windows and- fuck.
Why was the Sun coming up?
And so you’d rushed to get at least half an hour of sleep before you had to get up for your 8AM lecture.
Professor Yaga taught Film 101 as though he was trying to scare everyone off it. Rigorous coursework and never-altered deadlines. Though you yourself wouldn’t consider him an unreasonable man, it was impertinent to be punctual and alert in his classes - and right now, you were feeling neither of those.
By the grace of the universe, you’re somehow managing to stumble into class just two minutes after it starts. It’s not enough to rouse Yaga’s anger - and either way, you had made a name for yourself as one of his most avid students - though it does get you a sternly raised brow as you apologize and take the nearest open seat.
Just-so-happening to be in the very last row.
At the very forgotten corner.
Right beside who you knew to be Yaga’s actually most avid student—Choso Kamo.
Had it been a race between the two of you - perhaps between the entire department - Choso would have finished five times before anyone’s even stepping past the finish line. You would’ve gotten second. And that wasn’t to diminish your abilities in any way - you’d long since proven yourself to be one of the best students this course had even seen - it’s just…Choso was a film nerd through and through.
If there was anyone that could live up to such a title, then it was him.
Choso lived, slept, and breathed film and television. He could name any television show around the world with just a single frame, and most he could recite line-for-line. Oh, that? He learned Korean just to immerse himself in that scene in Parasite. That scene? It was from the 1957 Sri Lankan film Amba Yahaluwo, by the way did you know that Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom was filmed there, too?
Knitted vest. Hair in two messy space buns.
Clunky glasses rested atop his nosebridge, and dark bangs covering most of his vision, you’d often see him tottering around campus with a column of books that was damn-near taller than him. And despite his towering demeanour - from your mental counting, Choso was around 6’2 or more - around most of the student body, he was the type that couldn’t meet your eyes no matter how many classes you shared with him.
Even now, as you seated right next to him and smiled- Choso softly yelps and turns away from.
You don’t take it personally, of course, as he was simply the shy type. And by the flush that rises to his high cheekbones, you know he - at the very least - doesn’t dislike you.
Situating yourself, you’re opening your bag and pulling out your laptop. Opening it- fuck.
The briefest flash of one of Curses’s previous streams—where he had his cock in his hands and his face contorted mid-ecstasy flashes across your screen. And you can’t slam your laptop shut fast enough- cracking it just the slightest bit to exit out of the numerous tabs, fingers nothing but a blur. Thank fuck your volume hadn’t been set on high.
Head ducked, you’re looking out from the corner of your eye to check whether Choso had seen anything.
But if he did, he shows no indication.
Only keeping his back ramrod straight- his gaze ahead- his flush fiery as he listens to whatever Yaga was saying.
And so you think you’re in the clear…for now…
Opening your laptop up once more, you’re logging onto your lecture platforms and attempting to forget about last night. Which was difficult when that smile upon Curse’s face, just beneath his mask - was the only thing running through your mind.
And before you know it, you’d been staring blankly at your screen for a few seconds—before Choso inches in just a centimeter closer. Unwilling to let himself take up even more space. He keeps his eyes trained ahead and his voice - fuck, you’d never heard his voice before but it was just so deep and measured, something you wouldn’t have expected out of him - low.
Whispering to you, “H-he’s on Chapter 18 of Stone Butch Blues, we’re about to write a screenplay for the zoo scene.”
“Ah…” You don’t know whether you’re more surprised at the timbre of his voice or the way he managed a proper sentence out to you. All your previous attempts at conversation throughout the semester had been futile—and you’d long resigned yourself to the idea that he was too nervous to ever talk to you. “Th-thank you.”
He doesn’t answer but nods in shy acknowledgement.
And as you’re opening up your file, you bask in the realization that Choso Kamo was actually hot underneath those glasses. If only you could see his features further…
Maybe you’re being a little delirious. Your eyes feel heavy.
Heavy.
Heavier.
Tap-tap-tap.
A shake.
Tap-tap-tap-tap.
A warm hand on your shoulder, by the time you’re opening your eyes- you’re looking up into even warmer, molten chocolate-colored ones. They were framed by fawny eyelashes and thick glasses that made his shy gaze seem ever-so-slightly amplified.
You think you’re stunned for a few seconds before Choso speaks, “U-um…class is over.”
“Oh.” That makes you dart your head up and look around, noticing that most of the students had filtered in or were in the process of already doing so. “Oh, shit-”
You’d seriously slept through all that?
And Yaga had left you alive?!
No, you weren’t going to question this act of mercy—thank goodness for the last row, because he likely hadn’t been able to see you. Shooting upright, you’re grabbing all your things and hoping you hadn’t snored next to the sweet boy - “Thank you so much for waking me.” You’re turning towards him and saying, earnestness seeping into your tone. “Knowing me, I would’ve slept right through till next class. Might actually have been more convenient.”
He startles into a laugh then raises a hand up to his mouth and quietens himself down, “It’s alright.” You’re staring closely at the little bells of laughter, and he turns his eyes downwards. Bashfully admitting, “Happens to me too, whenever I stay up um- studying. Long night?”
You sigh, “You could say that…” Not a long night studying, but…
And as the conversation quietens down and Choso worries down on his bottom lip, you’re hiking your backpack up on your shoulders and saying. “Well, I guess I should be going then. Catch up on the recordings of the lecture and everything-” Turning, “See you ‘round—and thanks again.”
You make all of five steps before Choso finally gathers up the courage to call out-
“Wait—!”
Confused, you’re facing him once more. “Yes?”
And his hand was out, his fingers were slightly trembling. He was mouthing out the words as though still debating whether to speak them into existence - whether he was capable of. “I…we-” Eventually mustering up the courage once you give a reassuring nod, “When will we meet up?”
That makes you pause.
Was he…
“F-for the assignment.” Choso clarifies, a flush rising to his cheeks as he likely realizes he should’ve led with that. “Professor Yaga’s mid-semester project he always does…”
Ah—you’re clapping a palm on your forehead. How could you have forgotten? Yaga had announced at the start of the semester that about halfway through, the class would be paired up or put into groups to work on a collaborative project that contributed to about 50% of your grade. This semester, it was to write a full-length movie screenplay for a book or musical of your choice. And you’d been excited for it, in fact, but after the…activities of last night it’d completely slipped your mind that he’d be delving more into it this lecture.
And the poor boy stumbles through his explanation, “H-he let everyone choose their partners, and I wanted to wake you up but…you just looked so peaceful.” He fidgets with his fingers and flushes, “I th-thought one of your friends would come up here and choose you but-”
Probing him gently, “But?”
“B-but I’m afraid you ended up paired with me.” Choso just looks so genuinely apologetic- “I’m sorry- no one picked me either. I should’ve woken you up, but we can go talk with Professor Yaga about changing partners if you’d like-”
“Hey—wait.” You’re cutting off his spiel, something in your chest aching at the utterly devastated furrow between his brows. You take a step closer to him, “I would love to do the project with you, Choso. No need to talk to Yaga about anything.”
He looks up at you with wide, disbelieving eyes. “B-but your friends…”
“I don’t really have close friends in this class, anyway.” You smile, “I’d much rather do it with you.”
“Really—?” Breathed. As if he couldn’t believe it.
And it’s after some time - and a deep inhale - that he speaks again. Finally sinking in that someone would choose him of all people—that you would, that he speaks again. “And um- would you like to work on the script at my place?” Before you can answer, his breath hitches and his head shoots up. “N-not that I’m pressuring you into…it’s nothing weird, I promise! We can meet anywhere else you like- the library, your place- wait, no that’s weird, too…”
“Choso- Choso.” You giggle. And if this was anyone else then you would’ve assumed that they were putting the moves on you. “I’m okay with your place.”
.
.
.
The apartment was a fair distance away from the campus dorms.
Which made sense, you suppose, given the fact that less than half the people there would be able to afford the rent on such a place—especially after tuition. The highrise dove into the clouds, its vermicular body scaled in glistening windows and gold-accented furnishings within. You got the distinct feeling of being swallowed whole as you entered through the widely-gaped entrance, with several doormen and security that eyed you up and down, bowed at Choso.
You thanked them and made your way - slightly speechless - through the hallways.
This was everything you could ever dream of, and you’re sure you spot the odd actor or two down in the lobby. As you’re getting into an elevator the size of your entire dorm room, Choso punches in one of the highest floor numbers and turns to you-
Throughout the bus ride here, you’d been the one chattering away. And so it surprises you once he finally speaks, “I-I’m sorry…my place is a bit of a mess.”
“Can’t be as bad as mine. I won’t judge.” Who cares about a mess when he lives in a place like this? You couldn’t wait to go inside…
He pushes his chunky glasses upwards and gives you a shy smile, “Thank you.” Looking down at his polished shoes, “You’re so sweet.”
“Thank you.”
And you rise upwards in silence.
Soon enough, you’re finding yourself being led up to his massive apartment. He’s punching in the numbers of the code and setting his backpack down—telling you to make yourself comfortable. And you shuffle inside awkwardly; past the lavish furnishings and the alien-shaped lamps that all rich places seemed to boast.
He leads you in the direction of the master bedroom - where Choso said that his film collection was vast and likely to reveal techniques that the two of you would be able to incorporate into your own script.
“I even have a copy of Momijigari- it’s one of my most prized possessions.” He shoots you such a charming smile, eyes twinkling behind his glasses, over his shoulder. Heading inside.
And you can’t help but follow.
A single step inside his not-so-humble abode and you’re feeling a sudden sense of déjà vu wash over you, rendering you unsteady on your feet. Not quite sure why, you’re sweeping your eyes around the space: the high-quality camera equipment in one corner (not unusual to see for a film student), the chic furnishings, and then over to the empty wall space above the king-sized bed, something in you remained dissatisfied as they find nothing there but white plaster.
Choso notices that you’ve stalled behind and looks over at you curiously—he was taking a seat on the carpet, laptop opened up on top of the coffee table. “Something wrong? I’m sorry, I know it’s really messy but-”
“No, you’re good.” You shake your head, “It’s actually not messy enough.”
He smiles.
That night, you went home and wondered why Choso’s smile looked so familiar.
.
.
.
The musical that you’d chosen for your ‘adaptation’ was The Phantom of the Opera, suggested by you, of course.
And if there had been any connection to the masked man you’d been watching the night prior, then you were just glad that Choso had no idea.
It was far easier, given the fact that it’d already been adapted from the initial novel—though that only meant that Yaga would be critiquing yours even harder.
So you had to strive to be more cinematic, than the others in your class, stronger in ways than the ones before you - and though you doubt you’d ever match up to Schumacher’s visuals, there was little doubt as to whether you’d be the best amongst the students. This was a screenplay made to impress, and in the week since you’d pored over it—and Choso Kamo’s mahogany coffee table typing away at it, you only grew more determined in the fact. And throughout the week, you’ve been flitting in and out of that very apartment of his.
Choso had been a lovely partner for the project - the best you could’ve ever asked for - and you’re coming to find that he was actually far more funny than anyone ever gave him credit for. Far more open. Far more active when it came to something he was passionate about.
And of course, you knew that he’d be sweet.
Despite his initial insistence that he could do the project himself, you’d taken up half the work. And you’d joined him in browsing through his massive catalogue of movies, in searching up screenplays to read, and in annotating them for techniques when starting to write yours.
You’ve come to make friends with one of the doormen by now.
Just today you’d watched the 2004 Phantom of the Opera adaptation. And after a few hours of occupying his space and getting to know the nerdy boy a little better, you’d go straight back home to…Curse.
Whenever Choso made you feel tingly with his sweetness, Curse would amplify that heat to right between your legs.
It’s been a week of getting to know Choso Kamo, and a week of having Curse splashed across your laptop screen—cock furiously hard n’ his moans echoing. He’d smile and utter your username whilst wearing his iconic mask and it’d be a high strong enough to follow into the day after. And often Choso would ask you what you’re so happy about.
Today, in particular, Curse had just finished one of his streams - cumming aaaaaall over the desk this time - when he’d settled himself back down and started chatting with the comments. Responding to one or two of yours.
You’re just about to joke about why he was sticking so long after his orgasm when he speaks once more-
Voice somewhat serious, “Alright, now…settle down, settle down.” Curse waves his hand airily at the camera, throwing a middle finger up when the chat only gets more frenzied. “Tch- what brats you all are, would you wanna roleplay that someday?”
@vampzo333: YES PLEASE.
@likezmenpregnant: How about you be the brat…?
@Ietsmakeamovie: I would like that.
@sixeyesorsixh0les: ^^
@0003h0lesforCurse: ^
“Fine fine…” Underneath the mask, he rolls his eyes fondly. “But I really do have something to announce-”
@likezmenpregnant: You’re pregnant.
@Ietsmakeamovie: I’m the father-
@Curse’swifey: NO MEEEEEEEEEEE!!
“I’m thinking of getting a partner for these streams.” He finally admits, rubbing his chin as though still in thought. And your heart stops-
@bipplruletheworld: so down.
@Cursenoticeme44: Omg yeeeeeeeeees!!
@daddytoeknee: YESYESYES.
The chat practically explodes, and you’re unsure what to feel about it—after all, you don’t know Curse and it’d be strange to feel a little possessive over his solo streams, however, you did have your preferences. But then again, you can’t help but imagine just how much hotter it would be to have two people- perhaps to see him make expressions he never has before…
Ultimately, you’re quiet as Curse leans in and scans the chat. His brows furrow just a little as he sweeps through the blurring usernames, “I dunno…I’m still thinking about it- I haven’t even asked this person, to be honest. I just wanted to know what you guys thought.” Nodding his head along or huffing out laughter at some of the comments, “Movie?”
You jolt—at being called out.
He wanted your opinion specifically? You suppose you did contribute to about half his comment section most streams.
But you stall as your fingers reach for the keyboard.
Biting down on your lip and contemplating for a little while. Though he waits as patiently as ever-
@Ietsmakeamovie: I don’t mind!!
Something seems to wash over him as he reads your comment, nodding. “I see.”
He moves onto something else and his expression was indiscernible.
You’re flickering your eyes to the artwork behind him, the small corner of it peaking into the frame, and it suddenly hits you that it’s the theatrical poster of The Phantom of the Opera (2004).
.
.
.
It can’t be.
It can’t be.
It can’t be.
There’s something your brain was telling you that you’re absolutely refusing to believe—after all, how many people in the world loved The Phantom of the Opera? Hell, how many people in the world have watched The Phantom of the Opera?
That didn’t mean that everyone you came across had a secret identity as one of the hottest streamers on C4mBoyfriends.
You were being paranoid, you told yourself. You were being utterly silly- and the next time you’re going over to Choso’s apartment was the very next day. Which wasn’t entirely ideal, given how much you’d tossed and turned after Curse’s last stream conjuring up all the possibilities…but Yaga wouldn’t accept a request for an extension even if you were set on fire in front of him. And so you went.
The pit of your stomach twists as Choso swings the lavish wooden door open and gives you a beaming smile. So innocent. So sweet.
He shakily pushes his glasses up as he welcomes you in. “Come in—s-sorry if I took a while to get to the door, I’ve been doing some decorating recently.”
His nervous smile is what makes you find your voice. And you’re dubiously looking around the luxurious apartment, “You need to do some decorating?”
“Believe it or not, yes.” Choso huffs. “Would you like something to drink? Or maybe to eat? I checked out that bakery you recommended last time and you’re right- they have the best Danish pastries.”
“Actually, Choso…” You’re shaking your head, shooting him a grateful smile. “I’m good. I’d think I’d prefer to start right away, if that’s alright? I really wanna get to Act 2 today.”
“O-oh, of course—!”
And he’s sweetly guiding you inside, whilst you attempt not to look like you’re taking two steps at a time. Back to that familiar room. Back to that familiar desk. Back to that (somewhat) familiar bed which most certainly did not have an artwork from The Phantom of the Opera on it—
You open the door and the first thing you’re seeing is the familiar plane of that white mask. The Phantom.
Choso follows behind you and catches you staring at the poster. Gravelly tone echoing from behind, “I told you I did some decorating.”
And you jump-
Swivelling around to find him bearing you a sheepish smile, “Sorry if I startled you.” He pushes those chunky glasses up, “Tea?”
“S-sure…” You breathe, if anything for a thing to occupy your mouth with. Wait- not like that—!
And as Choso disappears down the hall, you’re taking a seat on the bed you’ve sat on countless, countless times before without a single care in the world. Now you’re sinking into the very - the very - edge as though it’d swallow you whole.
Body just resting on the plush comforter before-
“Hey, so I also have coffee if you would prefer?” Comes Choso’s sudden voice.
And you’re startling once more- “Just tea is fine, thanks.” Barely managing to get that through your lips, you’re watching as he disappears…as the sound of his footsteps echo…
Before darting off the bed and now heading towards the camera equipment you’d noticed in the corner the first time you’d been here. What you’d assumed to be part of another one of his classes or personal projects. Now, you’re leaning in and wondering with just which camera he showed his pretty cock off to millions, at just what height of his tripod he made your cunt so heated.
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck this was real.
Now, you’re noticing things in the room that you’d never noticed before. Like the ring light kept underneath his bed, and the dresser in the corner with numerous rings- those weren’t costume props or anything. They were pure silver.
Heavy.
Heavy, like the pit in your stomach—excited and swirling. Just trembling at the tips of your fingers - ever-so-slightly - you’re reaching out as though to touch it, as though to feel the alternate version of Choso that you knew longer than you knew Choso-
“Ah, so you’ve realized.”
And then his voice permeates the room.
The room that suddenly seems smaller, the room that suddenly seems to rise ten degrees in temperature - though goosebumps skitter across your skin. And almost as though in a horror movie, you’re turning in slow motion to face the bespectacled man who was now holding up a tray of steaming hot tea.
He walks over soundlessly and sets it on the coffee table with a slight click! And besides that, Choso walks over to the dressing table and puts his silver rings on.
One by one.
His eyes hold court with yours through the mirror, “How long?” Voice a deep timbre.
You’re taking a step closer without even realizing, “Um…just last night. Just now- actually.”
He chuckles and you realize he’s asking how long you’ve known about Curse.
“I-I found you by chance. About a week ago, actually…” And then you say what’s been on your mind ever since you had, “Ever since you liked and unliked my repost.”
“Ah, a rookie mistake.” Choso comments. “I should have known better than to stalk using my public account.” And with all rings now put on and glinting in the lighting of his bedroom, Choso shuffles through his jewellery tray to pluck his earrings in and one eyebrow piercing. And then…one lip piercing—a lip ring that twinkles mischievously as he smiles.
He rises and you think you’ve never quite appreciated his built frame.
His deep eyes as they’re locking in on you. Echoing out, “Though…you really can’t say much- can you, Movie?”
And though you knew that he knew- you can’t stop the zaps of electricity running through your body.
Sputtering out, “Yeah-” Your fists clench and you’re looking up at the object of both your fantasies and your secret interest these past few days - melded into one. “Yeah, I really can’t. Choso you’re so…”
“Different?” He fixes his glasses, “Though I really am shy, I can’t deny that- especially around you. But it helps to be a little more antisocial when I’m around idiots.”
He leans in closer- so close that his scorchin’ hot breath wafts across your features. You have no idea how you’d diminished such a distance so soon…
“And if my memory serves me right-” Choso taps on the edge of his chin, in mocking thought. “-I seem to remember that Movie agreed to have a partner on my stream.” You shiver. And he looks at you adoringly, “So how about it? Wanna make a movie, baby?”
You step a little closer.
“Only if I get to match wardrobes.”
He chuckles and picks you up to spin you around-
And then it’s getting to work. And then it’s shuffling through his closet to find a mask that matches his own.
He stretches on the rubber a bit and brings it to you—“I bought this one when I first started, but it ended up being too tight- I think it’d be just the one for you.”
It was. It fit perfectly.
And then he paces around the room and starts to set up- before Choso’s gaze catches you hovering around the bed, and then he’s clicking his tongue and forgoing the tripods altogether. With just the professional lights and the high-quality camera, Choso places the camera on top of the coffee table. Facing the foot of the bed - everything and anything could be seen.
Just with a few clicks he’s started the stream.
And with just a little nudge he’s urging you to sit next to him.
“Hello, my little sluts—” Choso- or should you say Curse croons towards the camera. On one of his monitors you can see him being projected there - waving, in his knitted vest that clashed with his mask. You stand off awkwardly out of sight from the camera. He smiles. “As you can see, things are a little different today…”
@girrrrrrrrrrth: uuuuuu change of angle!! change of angle!!
@bewbsRlife: ARE WE GETTING A SURPRISEEEEEEE??
@likezmenpregnant: Pls be pregnant, Curse <3
“No- no, I’m not pregnant.” He laughs, “But I have been thinking about what we talked about last night.”
@bipplruletheworld: omg this can’t be…
“And guess what? I did what you guys told me about- and I talked to her.”
@bipplruletheworld: yessssssss
@yoyoyoureinmypuss: I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE^^
@bewbsRlife: WOOOOOO-
@daddytoeknee: Omg where’s Movie, Ik she’d love this- heh. Imagine this WAS Movie though…
“So, my little sluts…” Choso announces, “I’d like to introduce you all to my new partner—” And he’s reaching out and clasping your wrist, looking up to check for reassurance before continuing. Miming whispering to the camera, “And this is her first time on stream, so be nice…”
You’re sheepishly walking into their view.
Slightly bowing your intrusion into the stream, “Th-thanks for having me?”
“Isn’t she cuuuuute?” He asks the commenters, and there’s a flurry of agreements. You’re even spotting a few questions about your name n’ interests, even kinks, amongst those - all of which Choso waves off with a laugh. “Now now—we can have the Q&A later. For now, let’s get to the fun part…”
@Curse’swifey: FUCK THAT’S MY FAV PART-
@2coolforcond0ms(i’mavirgin): Movie you’re missing out on a historic moment uwu
And the fun part consisted of clamoring onto the bed as fast as lightning. Letting the mattress dip n’ creak its protests out as Choso sits on it with his back turned to the camera, then lovingly pats his manspread thighs as a signal for you to climb on. Meaty muscles. Thick enough for you to want to sink your teeth into- how could you never have noticed?
Perhaps because this was the polar opposite of how he acted when he was on campus - always keeping to himself, never taking up too much space. Now he was practically vacuuming it all up so you had nowhere else to sit.
And you were more than happy to climb onto Choso Kamo’s lap.
Sitting your ass down on his readily-awaiting seat. From under your skirt you feel something hot—and throbbing between his legs. Cylindrically shaped and curved to the left.
Just the slightest movement makes his rock-hard erection twitch underneath- and you’re whimpering at the lewd sensation. At the way he drips out a hefty dollop of precum that seeps through his trousers and sticks to the front of your panties, making you gasp—“Ch-Cho-”
“Shhhh.” Choso wraps a hand ‘round your throat and cuts you off.
And before you know it, he’s bouncing his knees to get you to slide your drippin’ pussy up and down his bulge. Up and down. Turning towards the camera, “Ya hear that?” Up and down. “My girl’s so needy- she’s already begging for it. But I dunno if she deserves it, huh?”
@bewbsRlife: I MEANNNN
@theh0rniestsoldier: i’m feeling mean today…
@daddytoeknee: Give her your mouth!!
“Mouth? I love that idea.” Choso titters.
And then he’s giving a teasing slap on the side of your ass cheeks—smack!
“Please-”
“Sit on my face now, baby.” He purrs, eyes flickerin’ with pure need underneath his mask. Then leaning in to whisper in a loooow tone for only you to hear. “You know Choso, but let’s see if you can handle Curse.”
Then he leans back on the bed - his head pointing in the direction of the camera.
And you’re shuffling up Choso’s toned, brick-hard body—straddling your knees upon either side of his head, veerin’ your hips right atop that pretty face. You’re sitting - right in front of the camera. Though nothing was revealed…yet.
And Choso’s digging his tongue up to you instantly- he isn’t even making it past the fabric of your panties. But that doesn’t stop him from lettin’ his tastebuds take a looooong, luxurious lick of your swollen pussy.
Right down your sopping wet slit.
Suddenly, the room echoes with one of his pornographic moans- the very same ones you’d listened to night after night through your laptop speakers. Now they’re even louder, and somehow even sexier, sending electricity shooting straight up, up, up from your core.
And even more treacherous was the way you’re feeling something cold…and metallic at the very middle of Choso’s tongue. Rock-hard. It takes whatever’s left of your rationality to realize that it’s a silvery tongue piercing smack-dab where his tastebuds kissed your pussy. Scraping alongside where you were most sensitive.
Instantly; your head tips back and saliva starts bubbling at the sides of your lips. “Fuh-fuck…” And before you know it—you’re starting to drag your throbbing pussy up n’ down his features.
Short, barely-there jerks of your shy, shy hips.
And Choso chuckles huskily to himself at the cute way you were yearnin’ for his mouth. But what you didn’t expect was for him to reach one ringed hand up and squeeze the left side of your hips.
Your only warning.
Before he’s suddenly tightening his hold on you and reaching one more hand up- snaking it beneath your skirt like some pervert. Choso edges towards your throbbing cunt and places one good slap—
It’s the resounding smack! of skin-on-skin that makes you halt more than anything.
Jaw-dropped. Thighs quivering. The white-hot pleasure runs through your spine and leaves you barely hearing his roughened words, a tone lower than you knew his voice to be- as though drunk on the delicious taste of your pussy already. “Greedy, greedy girl…” Choso tuts, “Don’t tell me you’re trying to enjoy yourself without letting our dear audience in on the fun?”
Oh, shit.
You’re letting your head snap to where the camera was positioned and blinking its one gluttonous eye. Comments flooding the screen of the monitor so fast that you couldn’t read them-
You’d completely forgotten about the stream for a second.
“I—oh, I um.”
Yet another harsh smack! “Forgot, huh?” Amusement seeps into Choso’s words, as though he’d already guessed the situation.
You admit, “M-maybe…”
“I’m afraid I can’t blame you, baby.” Smack! “Curse’s mouth is too good, huh?” He yammers on and on, his tongue nudging deeper, his rippling tastebuds skidding into every ridge- as if trying to fuck you through your damn panties. “This pussy’s too good–she’s purring f’me already. Hear her?”
And you’re not sure why- but you’re nodding to whatever he says. “Y-yes—fuck.”
“Mhm. So why don’t we let our lovely audience hear, too, huh?” You’re barely given the time to register his suggestion, before Choso husks out a command. “Lift your skirt up, baby.”
Your thighs squeeze around his head at the notion-
And your fingertips touch the short hemline of your skirt.
@Cursenoticeme44: Holy shit.
@theh0rniestsoldier: i’ve been waiting for thisssssssssss-
@daddytoeknee: WOW.
@girrrrrrrrrrth: bby’s so needy!!
@R€4leater: munch Curse #canon
The chat explodes as you let them bear witness to Choso’s face stuffed between your pretty legs- he’s redly-flushed and ravenous. They could see the slightest glimpse of his nose n’ the way he’s driving it between your sodden pussylips, diving and diving, they could see the glossy layers coating your cunt—and the way Choso’s pink lips come up to suck on it.
Those handsome cheeks of his hollow out, as he’s makin’ out with your pussy through your panties.
Like a man starved.
Long canines slightly nippin’ at your folds- almost wolfish in mannerisms.
“Oh p-please…” You’re quivering atop him. You don’t even know what you’re begging for—just that it feels so good to have him veering his tongue hungrily against your cunt like this. And you wanted more.
More, more, and more.
Choso’s holding onto your restless hips with a clammy hand- he’s stuck to you almost like adhesive. And he guides your hips - he fucking slows them down - whilst you continue moanin’ and shaking atop his raw mouth. Glistening wet tongue extending even more than its usual length to slide-slide-sliiiiide your panties to the side-
And you’re gasping at the sudden whiff of cold bedroom air against your naked pussy. “Ch-” A spank. “I mean- fuck, Curse?”
“Mhm, m’here, baby.” He drawls out. Slightly slurring with all the extra globs of your pussy juices - pooling straight into your mouth, n’ Choso reaches up and smooches your soft swollen folds to smear it all around. Like some gloss. “M’here aaaaaand- so are 820k sluts that wanna watch you break.”
“B-break?” You’re gaping, “I thought you were just gonna- ngh, eat me out…?”
“Baby, Curse never ‘just’ does anything.” And you’re shocked to find him sliding his tongue out, tipping his head back to refer to the camera on the coffee table. “Isn’t that right, fuckin’ pervs?”
@daddytoeknee: Hell yeah.
@0003h0lesforCurse: duhhhhhhhhh
@yoyoyoureinmypuss: YOU’RE THE BEST CURSE
@Fishygurodad: Fuck, her pussy’s divine.
“Heh…” Choso smiles into your cunt, “And so whaddaya say? How many slaps before I stick my tongue in her?”
@vampzo333: 3
@bbynohuuuuzz: 14
@Ilikepr1menumbers: 29
“Since m’feeling nice- read your favorite one out, baby.” He murmurs.
To which you’re unable to do anything but- you tilt your upper half just the slightest bit closer to the monitor and pick out the first one you can read through the blur of words and numbers:
@Fishygurodad: Until she cries.
Oh.
Your blood runs cold.
Your cunt grows heated.
And before you can either rectify your recitation or beg for mercy—Choso doesn’t hesitate before fixing the rings on his fingers to be slightly higher than before. Making sure they’re in line of him planting one- two- three good, loud spanks on your sobbin’ cunt. “O-oh my god- fuck, mmm, oh my god.”
Until the skin of his fingertips seems to redden, and your pussylips feel raw - “How about that?” He asks- not from you, but from the viewers.
@daddytoeknee: I don’t see her crying yet…also idkkkkk I’m getting Movie vibes.
@girrrrrrrrrrth: movie would’ve loved this-
And then it’s one after the other. Again and again, Choso’s emblazoning the rude outlines of his rings against yours - until you’ve fucking memorized the ridges n’ patterns of the one ring on his middle finger with the carving of an octopus.
Tentacles flared out.
“Shit, not that damn ring again.”
And as he’s doing so he can’t help himself- fuck, he can’t heeeeelp himself. His canines dig into the sticky fabric of your underwear like a damn dog - and throughout the duration of what his hands were doing, you’re hearing the sharp riiiiip of fabric tearing—!
Soon enough, your panties are tattered and ruined in Choso’s maw- just from his mouth. He spits it out and continues swerving his thickened tips inwards to give a loving pinch on your clit—and you can’t help but burst into peals of shrill, needy cries. Both pain and pleasure mixing as he doles out a final swat-
Before Choso swipes your pussylips apart and spits- the glutinous glob of his saliva landing directly on your hole. He doesn’t give it the time to seep back out—instead, he’s surging up and shoving his face between your legs.
This time, without the barrier of your panties in the way.
@CCpervnextdoor: HE FUCKING RIPPED IT OFF WITH HIS MOUTH??
@bewbsRlife: HOLY SHIT CURSE-
@Fishygurodad: Shiiiiit, I’d do the same ngl.
And then Choso’s shoving his tongue inside and slurpin’ all around your wet hole like a damn animal…
In and out.
In and out.
Probin’ into slippery sweet spots.
Chin hitting the back of your slit. Plastic mask rubbing against your clit.
Choso’s pierced tongue was going absolutely fucking wild inside of you. He wastes no time before gripping either side of your cute hips and slammin’ your pussy down onto his mouth- hard and fast. The perverted nerd is slashing his tongue inwards, smearin’ apart your glue-covered folds. As deep as he could go. He doesn’t care if it hurts, he just needs to make sure that loooong slick muscle of his tastebuds were scrapin’ every inch of your walls.
With the curved tip of it, he flexes it against a sweet bundle of nerves. Making you buck with a pitchy moan of his name—“Ch-Cuuuurse—!” And the sensation was made even more delicious with the way his orb tongue piercing presses in contrast against your hot cunt. “It feels so good, Curse.”
“I already know.” Choso pipes up- cocky in all the ways you never knew he could be. “I already know- but what about those fuckers watching, huh?”
“W-well…” Spit drivels down your chin, and you’re struggling to keep your eyes focused to read the urgent chat.
@bipplruletheworld: they’re so HOT!!
@NERDSAREMYBABYGIRLZ: OHHHH WHAT A MUNCH
@daddytoeknee: Me next <3
And it was clear that they were seeing the effect he had on you- how could they not?
Your eyes were dazed and teary, your thighs were shaking like leaves in the wind, Choso was making your body twitch—just from the way he’s reeling his entire tongue out. And breathing out steadily and slowly against your twitchin’ pussylips, freezing cold air that leaves you even wetter on top of him.
He’s unfastening his mouth - leaving it wiiiiide open for all the satiny ribbons of your slick to enter his gullet. And once you’re done- that isn’t enough riling you up.
Choso leaves a good slap on your folds and asks, “So…what about it?” Muffled through his mouthfuls.
“They agree- they agree—” You’re keening out. Star-struck, seeing pleasure burst behind your shuttered eyelids at the sudden stinging. “Fuck- you’re the hck! best I’ve ever had, Curse.”
“I agree.” He hums. And as if this entire ordeal wasn’t sinful enough, Choso’s swashing around the silky-smooth sap he’d collected from your leaking pussy. Letting the flavor seep into his tastebuds, before he’s then spitting again on your pussy. A semi-opaque layer of lewdness that coats your inner thighs in a sheen that catches the lighting.
Perfect on camera.
You’re squeezing your wettened thighs together and creating an audible squelch!
“Awwww, look- this pussy agrees, too.”
The gooey addition startles you- and you rut.
Only straight down onto his awaiting fingers.
@girrrrrrrrrrth: oh, shit is he…
@legsopenforcurses: With the rings on, too!!
@likezmenpregnant: My show is onnnnn
It’s such a fucking mess for him to navigate- even with his own fingers. Soon enough, you’re arching your back as you feel him intrude a single ringed digit between those utterly swollen pussylips of yours—almost difficult to find your snug hole between them. You’re damn lucky that Choso’s fingers were slender as well as incredibly lengthy.
Because he’s circlin’ your tight orifice a few times - only a few times - before inserting the sections of his finger. Quirking just right and hitting the exact bundle of your nerves.
That infamous g-spot that made you yelp once he starts and keeps on hitting.
And his rings- oh, fuck, his rings.
Just so chunky and textured. They were the perfect designs to press up against your walls and massage them stupid- every drag meant that you’re feeling them dig into ridges n’ crevices you hadn’t even known existed.
Hitting and hitting. Curling his dexterous finger and scraping- “Fuuuuck, oh my god.” The doughy tip of his finger soon becomes damn-near molded to the area where it was, and your eyes flicker to the back of your head as you continue anglin’ your hips so he could hit it perfectly. “Right there, Curse- r-right there.”
“I know.” Choso rolls his eyes - at least what seems like it underneath his mask. “That’s why I’m hitting it. Honestly…is my girl dickmatized?” He utters as he sucks on your clit—ultimately erupting a sobbing slurp! that makes him nod. “Mhm, I think my girl’s dickmatized.”
Tipping his head back before you can refute his claims. He then addresses the audience-
“Whaddaya think, my little pervs? Dickmatized already…maybe I should go easy on her, huh?”
@olderandR4w: nooooooooooo
@yoyoyoureinmypuss: NEVER.
@Fishygurodad: Go even harder.
“Tough crowd.” And with that said, Choso’s stuffin’ in just a few more fingers. Each with their own numerous rings and sopping wet sounds accompanying them—slurp!
One.
Two.
You’re counting about three of his prolonged digits pushin’ your tight walls to their limits, rubbing your sweet spots raw with his constant bashing rhythm, before lustful fogginess coils around your brain. And it’s around here that Choso catches onto the glazed look in your eyes and chuckles—
“Ohhhh, you really are dickmatized.” He hums to himself, though you’re sure the professional mic picks it up either way. “And so soon, too. Probably hasn’t had a good finger-”
A fourth being added so that he can scissor apart your velvety channel whilst still multi-tasking with his other fingers to ram into your g-spot.
“-or even a good mouth on ‘er…” To emphasize his point, he presses a dramatically loud kiss upon your clit. One that’s making you bounce n’ bounce your hips atop his clammy face, and grind your throbbing nub down on his pointed nose. The addition of his mask just makes that cool touch even more lecherous. “My poor girl.” Choso still mutters out despite the way he’s gluing your cunt to his mouth. He pulls away from your clit with a loud pop! “What do you think, my slutty audience?”
At the slurring question you’re letting your head down to watch him. “Ch…Curse, what’ve you got on your mind-”
“M’just asking what else you deserve, baby.” He coos. And questions them once more, “How about a little quiz? Which parts of Curse are going to make my poor, poor girl feel the best? A). My fingers. B). My mouth. Or…”
And he pretends to listen to your noisy wet pussy once more.
“Or C…” You could practically feel the grin plastering against your needy pussy. The way his eyes narrow in sinful amusement beneath his mask- you didn’t have to see his full face to know that Choso was enjoying this perhaps way more than he should. “—all of the above.”
And it was futile to think that they would answer anything else.
C floods your vision.
You’re letting your mouth droop, and your gaze meet Choso’s own between your legs- but you’re finding that you don’t have to say a thing for him to already know the answer.
And as expected, he gives a final roll of his tongue atop your clit - before munchin’ on your aching cunt once more. This time, he’s tunneling his fingers deep into your cavern whilst still licking inside with his prolonged tongue—when stretched out, Choso’s tongue could reach almost as deep as his fingers could.
Your cunt was being stretched-out to lengths you never thought about before.
Not only were Choso’s fingers thicker than yours, but his tongue was something ravenous- no matter how much you’re flinching in sensitivity, he isn’t slowing down. “Mmm-” He groans, barely breathing through even his flared nostrils. You’re hit with the distinct feeling that he thinks he doesn’t even have to breathe as long as he had you on him like this - “Mmm, hold still.”
Taking advantage of the fact to lavish your sensitive inches with kiss upon kiss. To grind his nose down purposefully on your clit. To glide his metallic piercing across those hidden spots. To bash your poor g-spot in again and agaaaain with his fingers before his tongue’s coming to the rescue to soothe the slightly raw sting-
So it’s not long before you’re throwing your head back and cumming.
Perhaps the strongest you’ve ever felt when you’re in the throes of your high.
You barter your hips forwards and keep up a steady pace - one that’s making Choso hit the exact spots you wanted him to during the peaks of your high. The utmost peaks. “Shit—shit, just like that.” Breathless. “K-keep going, baby, it feels so good.”
And he doesn’t even answer - too caught up in fucking you through your orgasm.
In the way you shudder above him. In the way you’re only getting even sweeter by the second-
Bodyheat raising a few degrees in temperature; your heart sings and the bed creaks with how much you’re jostling from above. This was even better than touching yourself to videos of him, there were so many thrills of bliss that he’s wringing out of you- like he’d wring out of himself during his solo videos.
With both his fingers and his tongue, slurpin’ and sliding. Those doe-like eyes of his are edging straight to the back of his skull as he feels your drenched walls cleeeeench around his pierced tongue, as though it’s the best thing he’s ever fucking felt. And you’re acting on impulse - you really are - because the coffee table was positioned right beside the foot of the bed.
And all you had to do was reach your arm out to grab the simple camera there. Turning it into your point of view as Choso’s sweaty brown bangs stick to his forehead, as sweat trickles down his temple, as he lets out soft yet unyielding moans whenever you’re squeezing your thighs around his head.
@cockycockowner: no homo but that’s the most beautiful man i’ve ever seen.
@theh0rniestsoldier: woah he’s PUSSYDRUNK
@Fishygurodad: Show me his POV.
@daddytoeknee: Don’t you know that she’s his girl now smh?^^
@daddytoeknee: Movie-core- wya ml??
Choso cocks his head and keeps making out with your pussy in all the ways that make your toes curl—pleasure elongating from your orgasm and spreading into every part of you. Your vessels, your cells, your atoms.
They’re all buzzing with pleasure and still aching for more once Choso finally pulls away with a loud pop! of his lips releasing.
When they do, you’re sneaking a look down at him and noticing just how red n’ swollen they were. Even the skin around his jaw was flushed with the constant ramming contact. And the viewers are just gobbling it up - subscribing bells keep dinging here and there, and everywhere.
Just a single look at his stats on-screen reveal that Choso’s climbed up to 870k just since you’d started this stream.
And it’s after a little while - after he’s had his fill - that the dark-haired man finally taps at the side of your thigh to gesture for you to get up. Though, even then, he’s tightening his grip on your body—going against his own fucking instruction to press a final few open-mouthed kisses before he’s done.
He chases after your pussy with his maw for a little- before he’s finally sitting up.
And it’s only then that he seems to notice the camera in your hand, blinking his glazed eyes a few times to make sure he isn’t dreaming things up. Once it finally registers, the most attractive grin spreads across his face. “You changed POVs?”
“Had to.” You admit, “I wanted them to see how pretty you are…”
“Guess you finally learned about sharing, hm? Greedy girl.” He chuckles darkly to himself. And then he starts looming closer, “But you realize that the show’s not done yet, right?”
You gulp.
@Fishygurodad: Fuck her already, damn!! I’m only here for her.
@2coolforcond0ms(i’mavirgin): Hate to admit it, but he’s lowk right. I think I’ve discovered I’m bi…
@vampzo333: ^^
@girrrrrrrrrrth: ^^
“So impatient.” He looks at the monitor, reading the chat and tuts. “Honestly- so ungrateful. I should end the stream right here and fuck her on my own terms.”
There’s a frenzied flurry of comments- all of which you were sure were begging for Choso not to stop and bashing that one commenter for attempting to start a revolution. To which you’re only giggling and handing over the camera to him.
Choso - as the expert - then positions it somewhere by the edge of the fluffy pillows: where they’d be able to see the expanse of both your bodies and where you’d soon be connected…
And then you’re shedding your clothes in a hurry- making it to your smart blouse before he’s reaching a hand up and tearing through it. The buttons hit the floor, and at your noise of displeasure Choso merely lets out a half-delirious giggle.
He leans in and whispers, “I-I have a Phantom of the Opera t-shirt I’d love for you to wear.”
The change in demeanour gives you utter whiplash, and you can’t help but stare at him open-mouthed.
“What?” Choso asks, next moving on to shrugging off his own fabrics. They’re landing on a heap beside the bed, and your lips slightly part at the display of his red-hot erection—it’s just as large and sensual as all those streams had proven him to be. Polished strawberry top. Slender veins along the middle.
A happy trail of dark brown - nearly black - glistened with the splattered remnant of his precum. Just like the gleaming mess across his chin, mouth, and cheekbones that Choso wore like a medal.
He was slightly longer than even on camera- and even prettier up-close. Way up close- he shuffles his body up yours n’ fucks your tits a few times to dollop out glistening translucent precum across yours tits.
“Lighting’s not the best here.” Choso explains- or at least attempts to pin an explanation onto that. Onto something he’s clearly been wanting to do for so long. “Had to highlight ‘em, baby.”
You scoff, “It’s just…” Throwing a cautious glance at the camera, you lower your voice. “You’re so different from how you are in real life.”
“Oh? And how did you expect me to be, huh?” He positions himself between your legs - wrapping both of them around his waist. Before then thinking better of it and throwing them even more lewdly around his neck instead—his plush priggish tip kisses your entrance. “Did you expect me to be like…”
He trails off.
He doesn’t need to complete the rest of his sentence- and you don’t think you’d have heard him even if he tried.
Because in that very moment, Choso’s jerking his pale hips back a mere few inches—then plopping his globular tip between your pussylips and push-push-puuuuuushing. Fucking past the initial restraint of your first ring of muscle, he’s funneling in some thick inches that make your heels bang against the muscles of his back.
And he doesn’t even seem to notice.
He doesn’t even seem to breathe as he’s letting his cock swerve inside. Get suctioned inside. Get his Prince Albert’s piercing crept down your sensitive innards. Get gobbled up between your greedy legs-
You clench ‘round him and Choso throws his head back with a low, broken moan.
“Oh p-please—” He’s babbling out through unsteady pink lips, a lazy line of dribble starting up from one corner of his mouth. Those long lashes of his flutter as he’s reaching one bulky hand up to grip the headboard, and placing his right one on your hips- keeping you steady.
Fingers trembling. Muscles rippling.
@likezmenpregnant: Woah…make him do that again…
@sixeyesorsixh0les: SUBBY CURSE HELLO??
@whimperwhiteboywhimper: oh I am SO here for this
@Fishygurodad: Whatever…
Your eyes bulge once his throat cracks with what sounds like a whimper—“Please it feels so good.” And though you couldn’t quite make it out, even the chat seemed stunned as Choso punctures out a broken stutter of his hips. Delving a few inches into your goopy insides- though not enough to bottom out completely, as you’re still too wound-up for him to fit completely. And you’re able to pinpoint exactly where he’s using the orbed metal of his first piering. With more to come…“Ngh- oh.” Broken noises emanating into your eardrums and the mic. “It f-feels shooooo good, baby.”
Choso’s head drops into the crook of your neck, and there - and there - you’re feeling his cheeky grin.
And suddenly you’re understanding.
Oh—he was toying with you.
And he was doing it in a way that’d completely fooled you- and perhaps all of his viewers, too.
But before you’re able to open your mouth to bite back something at him, Choso staggers his hips back and gives you a vicious jackhammer with his cock, “O-ohhhhh, my god—” Your toes curl atop his shoulders, slippery with sweat. He hadn’t even rammed all the way inside yet, and yet the slightly left-leaning angle of his shaft was driving you wild.
Big and thick.
Running the slick globe of his tip down your walls, Choso probes a direct hit to that spot you loved so much. And he knew you loved it so much—he’d mapped out your entire pussy earlier, of course.
And yet, he’s still gasping as though the pearls gates of heaven had descended right here and there. He’s letting his sweet caramel eyes widen convincingly as he peers down at you, “I-is that…the spot, baby?”
@Curse’swifey: HE sounds SO NGH.
@daddytoeknee: Daddy likey…
@daddytoeknee: Also Movie would’ve really LOVED this, huh?
You hiss, “Curse, you should already know-”
“But how could I know—?” He exclaims. “This is my first time, after all…” Then Choso’s plastering his clammy tattooed hips - with a snake on the side - to yours, as though the two were connected by the force of the world’s strongest magnets: pulling and pushing, pulling and pushing. Every single battering ram of his mazing cocktip ends up lodged against your sweetly bruised g-spot, marking his circumference out with the sheer pace at which he was hitting it.
“Shit—” Your nails clench on the sheets, and feeling jealous- Choso guides them to fist his hair instead. “Shit, right there. It f-feels so good-”
“There?” The once-nerdy man breathes out in awe. Disbelief every single time - or at least the mocking imitation of one. Swipin’ a line of precum down your nervy spot once more, “Th-there, baby—?”
Something breathy- octaves higher in his tone. “Yes- yes there-”
“There-” Choked up and ruined. Husky grunts hatching in the back of his throat. There was something there in his words that you couldn’t quite pinpoint—a sort of undertone of primal need, primal amusement as he ruined your pussy with his speedily pap-papping hips, but acted as though he had no idea what he was doing. Every single syllable uttered was met with a thorough whack of his curved cockhead against your particular spot- “There there there there- there-”
“Fuh-fuuuck-”
“So this g-spot’s really m-mine now, baby?” Choso asks.
You whine, back arching off the mattress. “Yes-”
“Does she really have my mark on it now?”
“Yes…?” Eyes shooting open as you’re half-registering his question in your hazed brain. He bores his dark eyes down at you intensely. And as though to emphasize his point, you’re feeling his perfectly round tip squeezing into your throat by the next few thrusts. Deeper and deeper.
His Jacob’s Ladder starting to ease its frigid way past your entrance and glide across the roof of your cunt. It was a sensation like nothing you’ve ever felt before.
Choso probes even more, “I-is she really shaped to the shape of my cock now?”
“Cho—ngh.” Quickly shutting your cockdrunken self up. Quickly reaching a ringed hand up to squeeze your throat- before he’s languidly snaking his way up to squeezing your pretty cheeks together.
Smushing your face in a way that was almost disrespectful- though, not that you were in any state of mind to call him out on it. And there’s a mean inkling in Choso’s tone as he coos, “Awww, b-baby, why aren’t you answering me?” Another rude slap! of his hips make your own sear in flames- that damn strength of his. Those damn piercings of his. “Is your poor, poor Curse not good enough?”
Before you can answer, he’s looking at the blinking camera.
“My babies, my girl doesn’t love my cock anymore…”
“I do—I do-”
Squeezing his doughy-soft restraints - those contrastingly mean fingers of his - around your cheeks. He’s managing to smush your mouth shut and make you echo out the most pathetically pleading whines—as he fucks you. Determined and targeted.
The glossy rotund edge of his tip presses against your g-spot a few more times before you’re managing to make yourself take a peek at the comments on the monitor.
Almost too far away- almost too blurry with the tears in your eyes.
@Curse’snewestharem: Awwwww poor bby </33
@CCpervnextdoor: I would LOVE your cock, Curse!!
@girrrrrrrrrrth: is it just me or is he teasing us?
@Fishygurodad: ^^Yeah, he’s totally a fraud.
@Curseswombmommy: ^^girl shut up
“Th-they really think you’re oh-so-innocent…” You’re whispering up at him. Overstimulated tears in your eyes.
Breath hitching every time he’s surging his tattooed hips forwards and hitting that one spot particularly hard. Though there was never such a thing as too hard…
And Choso’s shooting you a secret smile - one just between the two of you - before morphing his expression into that of picture-perfect innocence. Roleplaying the demeanor of his nerdy self on campus, mixed with the utterly sultry—sexual way he was draaaaagging his lengthy cock in and out of your cunt.
Eventually, Choso’s emptying his inches out n’ bruising the bottom of your pussy. All of his nine - you seriously felt nine throbbing inches - inches shaping out the in-betweens of your legs. All of the beaded barbells of his Jacob’s Ladder massaging inside- the slitherin’ feeling of them making themselves at home. Zig-zagging and slithering.
He feels the sponginess of your cervix and presses a hand down on your abdomen just to make sure, before changing that excitement into one of almost-genuine bafflement- “I-I really bottomed out?” Choso’s pinkish bottom lip juts out and quivers dramatically.
“Of course, you did.” You’re ready to scoff-
But whatever sarcastic sound was in the back of your throat gets quickly dissolved at the sight of Choso with genuine tears in his eyes. Glistening. “But I never- ngh, never thought I’d be able to.” He puts some more merciless pressure on your stomach that makes you buck—
And the only thing you can do is let your head tip back into the pillows.
The only thing you can do is let out a few mottled moans as he rubs over the small tummy bulge he was fucking into you. Pushing his palm down so that he could feel it.
Whispering out, “I-I never thought this pussy would claim my cock as- ngh, hers, hm?” And for the moment there, you’re completely sure that he isn’t talking to you. Rather, your pussy that was sobbing out squelches after every one of his jackhemmerin’ thrusts. “And it’s not too big, right?”
“N-never—”
“Because m’just a nerd with a- hngh, biiiiiig fuckin’ cock.” How pitiful, right? He’s letting his long, dark lashes flutter as Choso avoids meeting your eyes—as though in shyness. He drills his hips even deeper - one unforgettable strike after the other following every word he spoke. “Just a big- fat- fucking- cock-”
“Please—!” Eventually, your arms reach upwards and you’re grabbing ahold of whatever part of him it is you could reach first. Which just-so-happened to be his bulky deltoids.
Choso’s brows genuinely seem to furrow at the lewdness of you digging your nails into his muscles, leaving your marks for everyone and anyone to see even after this stream has ended. And so he continues in his faux-innocent tone, “Oh? Did that feel good, baby?”
Purposefully slidin’ his cock across your g-spot so that you’d have to cry out. “Y-yeeees—”
“I didn’t even know, baby.” His mouth hangs open, and the most lustrous squelches! echo between your two connected bodies. Your cunt n’ his precum were making such messes…“I had no idea…”
His Jacob’s Ladder leaves your channel feeling raw n’ overstimulated- you feel raw and overstimulated.
And you’re laid-out on the bed dazed and feeling so fucking good as Choso’s picking his pace up even more, you notice for a split-second that his hands have moved. No longer was he holding onto your cheeks n’ watching you squirm—now, the nerdy man hooks both hands around your sweaty thighs and pins them close to his body.
Holding them in place as he leans down, down, dooooooown until the caps of your knees hit your tits.
You’re keening at the stretch, and a searing burn spreads from between your pussy and along your hamstrings. How did he even hide such strength underneath those soft knitted vest? Such a body?
Before you know it, you’re being pressed into your first-ever mating press.
And Choso gapes as though he was just as bewildered as you, “O-oh…did I do that?” He’s fucking asking you—however, when your stunned expression bears no answer, he turns and asks the same question from the camera. The bursts of replies obviously agree n’ tease him. And he’s shaking his head ever-so-slightly, “Did I really bend you in- heh-” A slight chuckle escapes him. “—half, baby?”
And what else can you do but nod and nod and nod—?
“I think this is called a…breeding press?” He cocks his head ever-so-slightly, before shaking his head. “No wait- a mating press.”
“A m-mating press.” You’re repeating lamely.
“I c-can’t believe I’ve folded you into a mating press, baby.” Choso nearly snarls at himself, his hips accelerating until that rouge-tipped cock of his was almost nothing but a blur. “Can’t believe—s’like my body is moving before my mind, ngh. My fat cock’s not hittin’ you too deep, right, my girl?”
“Not in the l-least…”
And he really was long enough to make each and every probe feel as though it was slam-slam-slamming into your throat- the capped crown of his shaft was entering crevices n’ crannies you hadn’t even known you possessed. All marked out precisely by the silvery orb of his Prince Albert’s.
Just then, after your answer, Choso reaches his left hand up to wrap ‘round your throat - and then hauls you back down to meet his slapping hips.
A thrust even harder than the ones before it.
Your breath gets snatched out of your lungs, dissipating into the heady air filled with the contact-riddled sounds of sex. Hard and fast. Only getting harder the longer you have your ankles looped ‘round his neck—“Not too hard, is it, baby?” Chosos asks you once more.
And you don’t have anything to spit out besides, “Oh f-fuck off.”
He gasps dramatically-
Well, not exactly dramatically. But in a way you knew was fake, and in a way that sends the chat exploding into comments.
The nerd pouts cutely, “Well, that’s not very nice…”
You’re rolling your eyes—right before Choso’s genuinely sending them rolling with his two fingers clamped around your clit. Using the silvery edges of his rings, he runs a few massages that end up with you sobbing and blabbering out your pleasure.
@Curse’swifey: FUCKKKKKKKKKK they’re both so hot. THEY’RE BOTH SO RUINED.
@peepeesarebetterfictional: they both look like they’re gonna cum soon hehe
@bewbsRlife: CUM CUM CUM CUM CUM
Biting back. “I would argue th-that that’s not very nice, either.”
“But m’just trying to make my gorgeous girl cum…” And from where he’d been looming his pretty face above yours, Choso then lets his head droop down between your tits. During his ravenous pace, he’s roverin’ his mouth all over to kiss and suck at your tits, your nipples.
His cold lip ring drags across your left areola- and he catches onto the way you’re shivering. Before Choso then grabs your nipple between his lips n’ hollows his cheeks out sucking—“Promise m’just trying to make you feel- hah, good.” He mutters, slightly muffled. “Promise I just wanna fuck my cock raw if it means making my lifelong crush feel good…”
“Cho- Curse, are you…?” Your eyes widen.
And his own flap droopily a few times, “Hmmm?”
And that proved it.
That proved it.
Because Choso Kamo could be pretending to be a stuttering, panting, blushing mess on your heavenly cunt all he wanted- he could pretend to be pussydrunk out of his mind. But at the end of the day, it was impossible to hide when pretend turned into something…more.
When the cocksure streamer that’d been driving you wild all this time morphs into the contentedly pussy-whipped nerd you expected him to be deep down inside.
His eyes genuinely glazed and blinking longingly.
His hair drenched in sweat.
His skin flushed with need- and only flushing even more fiercely the longer he kept his eyes on you.
Without much ado, you’re throwing your hands around his neck and tuggin’ him as far as he could crane his neck when his entire body feels like collapsing onto you and into your maddening pussy.
Choso pistons his hips slightly upwards to hear the slurp of his Jacob’s Ladder sliding across your walls, and he grooooans—
“Curse, baby…” You hum.
“Mhmmmm?” He replies with half-lidded eyes. Barely focused.
This was the big, bad #1 streamer on C4mBoyfriends? As though sensing your thoughts, Choso’s fingers grow a little more frenzied on your clit. “I need you to cum inside, okay?”
He jolts at the idea- that sinful, sinful idea. Before chuckling, “Never had any other plan, baby.” And then he turns to the camera, “What do you think, fuckers? Think my girl deserves to cum?”
@Fishygurodad: Yes.
@Curse’swifey: YES.
@likezmenpregnant: Yesssss~
@girrrrrrrrrrth: yesyesyes.
@daddytoeknee: Hell yeah-
He’s holding out a little longer to make sure there wasn’t a single ‘no’ in there - and had there been one, you’re sure that Choso would have stopped and edged your incoming orgasm until it was a wave of complete agreement.
Luckily for you, they liked you.
And all he does now is press down harder on your g-spot from inside, lingering, and massage a pretty heart on your clit once more, lingering—before a final, thorough stroke is all it takes for you to hurtle into your second high of the night.
For you to arch your body into his chest, and shutter your eyes. “Ch-Cho…”
Barely a whisper. He’s crashing his mouth into yours to make sure that secret between you two isn’t revealed. And you’re moaning deeply into Choso’s mouth as you cum—“Feels so- oh. It feels so…”
“Mhmmmm.”
Unable to even find the words.
The only thing you can do is riiiiiide out the massive wave of your high. It’s torrential; pure bliss floods your system from head-to-toe, and no matter how much you’re squirming your overstimulated hips, Choso only succeeds in batterin’ away his pierced cock into eeeevery single hidden sweet spot inside of you. The ones that prolonged your bliss and left spikes of euphoria leading up to your brain.
Your cunt clenched so tightly around his cock- almost as though you didn’t want him to even pull out. And Choso’s sweaty head drops once more into the crook of your neck as he cums with a shudder.
The knot between his brows deepening, the bedsheet around his knees bunching up as he surges his body upwards. Almost animalistically.
Choso bottoms out his furious, twitching cock and keeps it there- “Oh, fuck…” It didn’t sound like he was acting once his bawling red divot starts splatterin’ out more milky white wads. Deeep in the back of your pussy, right where your womb was, Choso puddles out his ecstasy in long ribbons. “Oh fuck fuck fuck—fuck. Always knew it’d feel this good.”
Wave upon wave.
Toes curling. Eyes scrunching shut.
If you thought his moans were sensual before, then you weren’t prepared for the ones your pussy was able to drag out of him - ragged and hollow utterances of your name. Over and over like a broken record, like a mantra.
He’s fucking into you to milk them out of his hefty balls- then fucking you again just to pump those webbed wads right back in. From the top of his rotund tip and dooooooown to the tufts of hairs at his base. All nine inches of him being used to stuff you till the brim—
You’re sure your insides look like an utter fuckin’ mess by the time he’s slowing his tattooed hips down ever-so-slightly—still shaking from the aftermath of his orgasm. This was far stronger than anything he’s ever experienced before.
Drunkenly, you’re blinking your eyes up at him. “Always?”
He smiles, “Ever since our first lesson of Film 101.” Admitting, he lovingly wipes off a bit of his cum you were foaming between your pussylips. “You referenced Pride and Prejudice when talking about the best lines of dialogue of all time, and I-I’d been a goner since then.”
“Corny…” You snort. Though you can’t help the flutter of your heart.
“So um- coffee after this?”
“It better be dinner.”
He laughs in agreement. “Also I bought a vibrating piercing the other day and have been dying to try it…”
Your eyes widen.
And once you’re helping him pull out- Choso reaches for the camera and gets a good shot of the cum leaking between your legs. Before you’re both waving at it, “Thank you for joining us, today—this was the most fun I’ve had on stream yet- heh.”
You’re shooting the camera a pretty smile, too.
And Choso kisses the corner of your cheeks, “Until next time. This has been Curse and Movie.”
@girrrrrrrrrrth: holy fuck??
@Curse’swifey: WAIT WHAAAAAAAAAAAAT NO WAY-
@bewbsRlife: HOLD ON-
@CCpervnextdoor: SAY SIKE RN?
@bipplruletheworld: oh my god that’s amazing.
@likezmenpregnant: Oh, a love story for the ages~
@yoyoyoureinmypuss: YOU TWO LOOKING FOR A THIRD??
@Fishygurodad: Damn.
@Fishygurodad: Hmu when he messes up.
@daddytoeknee: Stfu he won’t.
@daddytoeknee: Also I totally called it <3
A/N. I did NOT plan to have me inserted and beefing with Toji Fushiguro but here we are-
where during the biggest party of the year, the emo nerd you only found out existed yesterday finally makes a move!
tags! f!reader, teruhashi-like reader (but no one will compare to the perfect pretty girl tho) pining, slight stalking, kinda cheating choso wears glasses hell yeah, emo!nerd!loser!choso ngh, slight nsfw, y2k!au
a/n! im back, enjoy luvlies ⸜(。˃ ᵕ ˂ )⸝♡
credits! art: X:(Aransmind), and dividers by @angeliicide
high school in the 2000s was pretty much a living stereotype. there were specific cliques, a social hierarchy, drama, gossip, parties, and hookups. you of course, were above all that. not in the way you'd expect, though.
as leader of your 3-person clique, you were the undisputed and distinguished monarch of your high school.
hair always perfect, nails always done, flawless outfit even if you were out partying at 2am, heavenly body, spectacular makeup that highlighted your god-carved face, always with your favorite drink in your hand, and of course, people never blocked your group's way.
there were of course rumors:
"the other day i saw her at the mall, and i swear to god she had a golden aura, with cloud-like wings behind her"
"what, you're wrong, one time she was walking downtown, and at the victoria's secret store, the employees tried to recruit her to be an angel"
"you're all wrong. she literally doesn't need any of that. her parents own all the major companies back where she lives. i don't even know what she's doing here, this high school sucks"
"you know, i heard that when she went to a concert, the staff backstage invited her on stage just because she was that jaw dropping"
"not even close. once someone called her 'perfect flower-shop pretty' but like 5 guys told them that she was a wildflower, because her beauty doesn't even compare to those, and puts them all to SHAME"
"she literally got invited to the booth of the charli xcx boiler room, please"
needless to say, you had it all.
except... a decent boyfriend.
naoya zenin. literally the name of your nightmares. even god's favorite can't have it all, can she?
na*ya was genuinely the asshole of your darkest times. being forced to be his girlfriend by both of your families, you absolutely despised him. you had standards, for god's sake! the asshole had nothing going for him apart from his family's generational wealth. totally not your type
if you could go back in time in all of history, you'd definitely go back to the very first day of 10th grade, hit yourself with a bat, and stay the hell home, so that your eyes never got to see his unfortunate looks.
the worst part? being the school's queen, you couldn't openly hate him, his family owned the town, basically, and cherry on top? people thought you looked NICE together. please. as if such a neanderthal could ever stand a chance to be with a perfect beauty.
you couldn't count the amount of times you'd caught na*ya kissing others at parties with both hands, either, so you'd definitely considered if he played for the other team, with the amount of misogynistic comments and the time you swore he was kissing a dude at a party, even though he claimed he was drunk, drunk words are sober thoughts after all
< / ☆⋆。𖦹°‧ / >
your hatred towards your boyfriend was thank god, shared. choso kamo was, although, described as:
"uhhh who...?"
"oh i think i was paired with him for band, sick drum player"
"he's nice, his younger brother is like super popular, too"
uhhh he was, shy, to say the least, blending into the backroom of the messy art room and band class only sharing a few classes with the tall, dark-haired guy with glasses, never overly noticing him, always busy fixing your hair and gossiping away
< / ☆⋆。𖦹°‧ / >
choso was distraught, the emo, drum-playing, fine ass loser was completely and utterly devastated
having seen you ever since you walked into late into his art class, with a perfectly coordinated sparkly outfit, that complimented your body, swinging your hair creating swirls in the air, and sitting parallel to him as he worked, he has never stopped noticing everything you do, your smell, cute hairstyles, perfect hands and sugary but angular smile, he was, to say the least, swooned, he had memorized your schedule, stalked all of your instagrams, your 100 tiktok accounts, and even found your secret fanpages
and he did not know how you didn't notice
the way he got pink as the blush on your cheeks whenever he was in a room with you, how he always held the door open until you walked through and the way he downright stared at you, entranced
you hadn't noticed
well, who could blame you, a perfect pretty girl does have to keep up appearances, and had no time for losers like him
< / ☆⋆。𖦹°‧ / >
you didn't even know choso existed, you were too busy, organizing parties, staying on top of all the drama, and fighting with the nuisance that calls himself your boyfriend
that was, until the time of the biggest party of the year rolled around, which meant that you'd of course, plan it
with your parents gone, and alcohol bought, you'd spent the days decorating and preparing for the perfect party on friday
in your master bedroom, you lay down on your bed, browsing through last year's yearbook, on your silk sheets, planning on who to invite, with this being the biggest party of the year, there was no room to be caught lacking, so your friends were helping you prep everything as well
"okay, so the football team was invited, ugh, anota unfortunately too, the drama club, the basketball team, the tennis team, my hallway crushes, you guys' hallway crushes, the cool people from other grades..." you rambled, getting to the end of the impossibly long list, megan thee stallion playing on your rooms's speakers, golden light skimming through the walls, twirling your hair in circles, "i still feel like there's too little people, though"
that's when you got a brilliant idea, "hey... what if we skim through the yearbook and invite our hear me outs?" followed by an agreement from your two friends
you spent the evening ordering coffee and drawing hearts around new ones who were hot, and writing their name in your pretty little handwriting
that's when you got to the band club's pictures
you'd never even considered emo boys before
but damn... that brown haired guy...
he definitely changed your mind
you searched for his name
c... k... oh! right there
choso kamo: band club, art club, art honor society
you stopped dead in your tracks
how the hell have you never noticed before, damn! did he not get invited to most parties? well... his permanent anxious expression, dark circles and twin tails may or may not be the cause...
your friends did notice you staring mouth open at a picture, sitting upright, they took the book from your grip
"who are you looking at, anyways? close your mouth, a fly is gonna get in there"
how could you explain to your friends that the finest man on the planet was in that book, and you didn't even know his name before??
sure, popular girls and nerd losers don't get along... typically... you were sure you could make it work
so, after a session of screaming and surprises, your friends (with the hatred of a thousand suns towards naoya) decided to grudgingly invite him, not because he was kind of fine! you wanted to see how an emo loser behaved when surrounded by actual people, of course!
i mean, that's what you told yourself anyways
< / ☆⋆。𖦹°‧ / >
the day of the party rolled around, having spent hours dolling up, finding the perfect outfit to compliment your hair, skin and body, and manifestations to get naoya away from you
and maybe, just maybe
choso, on the other hand was a nervous wreck
having changed his outfit thrice, rotating between three different t-shirts and seven jeans, he settled on a nine-inch nails shirt, with a deep purple long sleeve underneath, dark jeans and with yuji's recommendation, let his shoulder-length hair down, giving it a messy and ruffled look
< / ☆⋆。𖦹°‧ / >
your house was floor to ceiling in decoration, lights flashing, glittering ceilings, kaleidoscopic floors, bar lined with glasses and bottles, and blasting music from the walls and excitement surrounding the growing crowd
you were, to say the least, the glowing center of attention, right in the center of the dance floor, where the dancing incremented and heat radiated
you noticed, from the corner of you eye, through the drunken crowd, a girl pressed against your boyfriend, gripping his arm, drink in hand
you grabbed your friend, dragged her towards them, and promptly bitch-slapping his sorry ass
"finally, i can be done with you, thank god we're over"
you turned around on your heels and went for another drink
making your way to the secluded bar, you bumped into a tall figure
"watch where you're going idiot," not in the mood to deal with any other issue
when he turned around, you quickly recognized the pale skin, chiseled features and face tattoo, as choso, who grabbed you by the waist to prevent you from falling
"sorry! i just came here, uhh... sorry for being in the way!" he stammered, as he looked into your glistening eyes
he rambled on, but you could not believe that the same needy guy who you only noticed a few days ago looked so... good...?
"um, sorry... are you okay?"
shit, you had completely forgotten the situation you were in right now
"yeah uh... choso, right?"
"wow! you... know my... name?"
"don't get any ideas, loser" but you stumbled, someone bumping into you, pushing you deeper into his embrace
you were drunk, sure but why was there such a warm feeling in your chest? heat spread to your face, but ew! this band kid nerd was touching you right now!
distancing yourself, mumbling something about his shirt, you gladly greeted others arriving at the same time, and yuji, bashfully surrounded by some girls
choso stood there, admiring your presence near him, you actually acknowledged him! that was enough to send him into the moon, and he was decided that that interaction alone was enough to fill his heart for at least 2 months
freeing himself from his entourage, yuji made his way to his brother
"choso you gotta do something more that letting her humble you! what the hell, do you like getting degraded or something?"
choso blushed, looking away, away at you, all the lights shining on you, lighting up your features and expression, when you suddenly looked at him, with the sweetest smile he had ever seen from a mean girl like you
"choso! in serious, go talk to her" yuji exclaimed, shaking him tightly
choso was seriously entranced, being overwhelmed by the ambient of the party and your entoxicating presence
< / ☆⋆。𖦹°‧ / >
"mghh" you moaned into his mouth, pressing your chest to his, his glasses askew, straddling his lap, as you grabbed his hands, pressing them against the headboard
choso didn't even recall how he got into this situation but he was definitely NOT complaining
he maybe remembered girls pushing him, laughing to the bar, giving confused looks to yuji and looking for you in the back
he also remembered the acid taste in his mouth, drinking the bright liquid and it dripping down to his stomach, soaking his shirt and the floor
he also remembered how you yelled at some point, getting his drink spilled on your expensive outfit, and you promptly giving him the meanest stare on earth as you headed to your room to change
then, he remembered chasing after you, opening the door, profusely apologizing, as he is met with the sight of you, in your underwear, cussing him out
as he was about to run off, he felt how you grabbed his hands, roughly pulling him in and locking the door, swearing to hod that if he left you'd make his life hell
as you continued your drunken kisses down to your bed, choso felt the alcohol taking over, making his face red, and himself sweaty
you stopped your kisses, sucking his neck instead, but as you worked your way down, meeting the drenched patch of his shirt
he let out a whimper as you settled on his lap, taking a look at his flustered face, you grinned, looking at his disheveled face, crooked glasses and messy hair
"you're so pathetic you know" you murmured, looking annoyed, but the blush dusting your face contradicted your expression, and choso's hands trailed over your lower waist, you gently contoured his face, tracing over his face tattoo and re adjusting his glasses but you felt a weight shift in between your legs
"..." choso blushed a shade of red, looking at everything except you
"no way you seriously got hard because of that" you mockingly laughed, tightening your arms around his neck, softly caressing his nape
"you're so mean, beautiful"
that earned an even deeper blush out of you, hiding your face in his neck
"what? your 'boyfriend' never said things like this to such a beauty like you?"
"ugh shut up! unless you want me to tell everyone you're a virgin and kick you out shut up..." you held the sides of his face and forced him to kiss you, earring a little whine out of him
"what, you'd never been drunk before?"
"n-no..."
he was so pathetic, and that turned you on endlessly, what would your friends say about this, what if someone walked through the door now? what would naoya call you??
"ngh... don't worry about all that princess.." choso drunkenly in between kisses whispered
shit, you said that out loud... but how could you worry now? as those sweet, drunken words were nicer that everything naoya had ever said to you
choso heard a soft sniffle from on top of him
he hurriedly held you in his arms, wiping away your tears, holding you tight, "h-hey, what happened? did i do something? i'm so sorry, i would never hurt you, sweetheart.."
"you're so dumb, cho...so..." you muffled lightly punching against his surprisingly toned chest, but there was no edge to your words, and choso knew that
he softly smiled, "i'm not going anywhere, if you don't want me to, baby"
you then pressed the lightest and sweetest kiss to his mouth, catching him by surprise, as he melted into your sour, alcoholic taste
< / ☆⋆。𖦹°‧ / >
choso's next weeks were something out of his dreams, he bagged the prettiest girl in town, having her on his arm 24/7, followed by her little clique of friends, her yapping his ear off, he was in paradsise
also, how could he complain, when you two got home, he always got rewarded with an hour long makeout shesh everytime
< / ☆⋆。𖦹°‧ / >
a/n! im soso proud of this onee, also i changed my layout ( ܸ. .)՞՞ hope you guys liked itttt ♡xx
told the nerd to film it and he exported inside me instead!
pairing — tech nerd!gojo x fem reader
synopsis : you crushed on him for months, watched him dodge every advance like you were malware. so you dressed up a little, played a little dumber—and now he’s got you spread out in pixels and moaning in surround sound. worst part? you kinda want him to do it again.
tags/cw — masturbation, degradation, praise kink, dacryphilia, marking, overstimulation, explicit language, filming, voyeurism, fingering, oral (f receiving), unprotected sex, creampie, squirting, rough sex, dirty talk, power dynamics, obsession, lingerie, virgin weeb satoru, questionable but effective way of seducing ur crush. 13k wc, 18+ only, minors DNI.
a/n : plz don't nitpick about how a fashion vlog shouldn't be like that bc that's the point. toru doesn't know the difference because all he watches is 2d girls
the compressor’s peaking again.
satoru squints at the waveform, drags the threshold down two decibels, then listens back to the same three-second clip of voiceover for the tenth time. it’s a podcast intro, some wannabe influencer droning about mindfulness. he doesn’t care. he’s just here to make it sound less like it was recorded in a bathroom.
“sounds like shit,” he mutters, even though it’s clean. crisp. perfectly balanced.
it doesn’t feel right. nothing ever does. he tweaks the bitrate, checks the export codec, wonders if he should build a custom ffmpeg preset. maybe write a quick script to batch clean all future files—something to shave off a few milliseconds of his life. his fingers hover over the keyboard, itching for efficiency, for control.
ping.
discord overlay glows in the corner of his ultrawide monitor, a neon-green intrusion on his meticulously organized desktop. he freezes. the notification pulses like a heartbeat.
you.
he stares at it, lets it sit there like it’s radioactive. doesn’t even remember keeping you added. your username—something stupid with a heart emoji—feels like a splinter under his skin. he should’ve purged his contacts months ago, but here you are, slipping through the cracks of his digital fortress.
hey. remember when u edited our project? can u help me trim some vids pls…
his jaw tightens. of course you’d ask now, at 2 a.m., when he’s neck-deep in audio plugins and caffeine. his fingers hover over the keyboard, poised to dismiss you.
“no,” he types, then erases it.
“what kind of vids,” he tries, but deletes that too. too eager. too curious.
after a solid twenty-five seconds of overthinking, he finally sends:
i guess. send what you have.
he leans back in his chair, the leather creaking under his weight. his room is a cave of glowing screens and scattered energy drink cans, the hum of his overclocked pc the only sound besides his own shallow breathing. he shouldn’t care. you’re just another art student, another distraction. but his pulse betrays him, thudding a little too hard in his throat.
flashback.exe
he hated group projects. despised them. a bunch of useless art students in overpriced streetwear, trying to make films with no understanding of pacing or continuity.
they’d fumble with premiere pro like it was rocket science, leaving him to clean up their shaky cuts and mismatched audio tracks. he always ended up doing 90% of the work, and he preferred it that way. control was his god, and he worshipped it.
but you were different.
not better. just... a different kind of stupid.
you showed up late to the editing suite, glitter pens spilling out of your bag, heart stickers plastered on your water bottle like a middle schooler’s diary. you called the lav mic a “weird nipple thing” and giggled when he glared at you. once, you spilled your lip gloss on the soundboard, leaving a sticky pink smear he had to scrub off with isopropyl alcohol. another time, you asked if uploading to drive made your data heavier, and he almost threw you out.
but.
you let him do whatever he wanted.
you didn’t hover or micromanage. you just sat there, cross-legged on a swivel chair, watching him cut scenes like it was magic. you leaned over his shoulder, close enough that he could feel the warmth of your breath, your wide eyes reflecting the glow of the timeline.
“whoa... you made it feel like a real movie,” you whispered, like he’d just parted the red sea.
you smelled like something artificial. strawberries, maybe, or some overpriced body mist from a mall kiosk. your hair was always tied with a ribbon—pink, blue, sometimes yellow, always obnoxiously bright.
he didn’t care.
he told himself he didn’t.
but he remembered. every fucking detail.
the zip file lands in his downloads with an obnoxious ka-chunk, snapping him out of the memory. he doesn’t rush. just opens it like it’s any other favor, like his heart isn’t clawing at his ribcage. the folder name stares back at him: “pls help <3”
typical.
he clicks it open, expecting shaky iphone clips of cafes and shopping hauls. maybe some cringe tiktok dance you think is cute. he’s ready to hate it, to scoff at your lack of framing or shitty lighting.
but then—
you appear on screen.
not just appear. you perform.
you’re biting your lip, laughing into the lens like it’s your lover. wearing something stupidly short—a skirt that barely qualifies as fabric, hugging your thighs like it’s painted on. you spin around in front of your mirror, the camera catching every angle, every curve, like you’re being filmed for someone else. someone who’d appreciate it.
you pose. cock your head. giggle. the sound is loud, breathy, smiling when you speak. “do you think this is too short?” you ask, tugging the hem of your skirt, your fingers lingering just a second too long.
he blinks.
backs the video up three seconds.
watches again.
your laugh echoes through his headphones, a little distorted, a little too close. he pretends he’s checking the audio, tells himself it’s for sync, that he’s just doing his job. but his eyes are glued to the screen, to the way your skirt rides up as you twirl, to the flash of skin that makes his breath catch.
he watches again.
his mouth is dry, his tongue heavy against his teeth. your skirt flips up higher this time, and you gasp—like you’re surprised, like you didn’t mean to show that much. but you don’t stop filming. don’t cover up. just... laugh, a sound that curls around his spine and sinks into his gut.
he doesn’t even realize his hand is moving until it’s there, slipping under the waistband of his sweatpants. his fingers brush against himself, and he hisses, the contact sharp and sudden. he’s already half-hard, his body betraying him before his brain can catch up. the room feels too warm, the hum of his pc too loud, but he doesn’t care. he can’t care.
he rewinds the clip again, pauses on the frame where you’re mid-spin, your skirt flared just enough to show the curve of your ass. his hand wraps around his cock, slow at first, tentative, like he’s testing how far he’ll let himself go. the texture of his own skin is rough, familiar, but it’s not enough. not when it’s you on the screen, laughing like you know he’s watching, like you’re daring him to lose control.
he strokes himself, a tight, deliberate rhythm, his thumb brushing over the tip where he’s already leaking. the sensation jolts him, makes his hips twitch in the chair.
he imagines it’s your hand, your fingers—small, soft, probably clumsy, but eager. he pictures you kneeling between his legs, looking up at him with those wide eyes, your lips parted like they are in the video, glossy and pink and begging to be kissed. or more.
the video plays on. you’re bending over now, adjusting your hair in the mirror, your skirt riding up to expose the thin strip of your underwear. he groans, low and guttural, his hand moving faster.
the sound of your voice—teasing, playful—fills his headphones, and he closes his eyes for a moment, letting it wash over him. “do you think this is too short?” you say again, and he wants to answer, wants to growl that it’s perfect, that you’re perfect, that he’d rip it off you if he could.
his grip tightens, his strokes growing erratic. he’s not gentle with himself—never is. it’s all pressure and friction, chasing the edge as fast as he can.
his free hand fumbles with the mouse, scrubbing the timeline back to the moment you gasp, to the split-second flash of your thighs. he loops it, the clip stuttering in time with his breathing, with the slick sound of his hand working himself over. his cock throbs, hot and heavy, and he imagines it’s you—your warmth, your wetness, the way you’d probably whimper if he touched you like this.
he’s close. too close.
his vision blurs at the edges, his pulse hammering in his ears. he shouldn’t be doing this, shouldn’t be jerking off to your stupid video like some desperate creep, but the shame only makes it worse, makes it sharper.
he pictures you catching him, walking in right now, seeing him with his pants down and his hand on his dick. would you laugh? would you blush? would you get on your knees and—
he comes with a choked gasp, his hips bucking up into his hand. it’s messy, spilling over his fingers, onto the hem of his shirt. his chest heaves, his head tilting back against the chair as the aftershocks ripple through him. your laugh loops in his headphones, oblivious to the wreck he’s become.
it’s filthy. it’s desperate.
ten minutes later, he’s cleaned himself up, his hands steady again as he trims the file like a good little editor. he cuts out the shaky parts, stabilizes the footage, adjusts the audio so your voice doesn’t clip. it’s clinical now, professional, like he didn’t just fall apart to the sight of you. he names it something sterile: “vlog_cut_1.mov.”
he exports it twice. once normally, for you. once... not. the second version is raw, unedited, every twirl and giggle preserved in crisp 4k. it gets copied to a different folder, buried in a directory labeled “shader_study_2022.” he tells himself it’s in case you need a re-edit. a backup. that’s all.
when you text back:
thank u!! lol i owe uuu :3
he stares at the message, his thumb hovering over the keyboard. his heart’s still racing, a faint tremor in his fingers.
he types “anytime :)” and erases it. sends:
np.
what he doesn’t say: he rewatched the part where you bend over six times. he had his dick in his hand by the second loop. he renamed the close-up to “test_render_asscloseup.mov” and hid it behind three layers of subfolders.
he doesn’t even like tiktok girls.
he’s into 2d, girls with big swords and bigger tits, drawn in sharp lines and impossible proportions. he once bought a dakimakura because the shipping came with a free pin, and it’s still shoved in his closet, one corner stained from a late-night mistake. real girls are messy, unpredictable, too much work. but now?
he’s thinking about the way your laugh dipped when you turned around, the way it caught in your throat like you were nervous. the way you looked into the lens like you knew someone was watching.
someone like him.
next day, you walk in like a fucking weapon.
pink fuzzy shrug, low-rise jeans that sit dangerously low on your hips, a sliver of stomach peeking out like it’s 2004. your hair’s up in a ribbon—pink, of course, swaying as you move. you’re all glitter and confidence, a walking distraction in a lecture hall full of tired students and flickering projectors.
he scoffs under his breath. “tacky.”
but his heart’s pounding, a traitor in his chest. his fingers twitch against the edge of his laptop, betraying the calm he’s trying to project. you slide into the seat two rows ahead and twist around, grinning like a cat, like you know something he doesn’t.
your eyes catch his for a split second, bright and teasing, and he forces himself to look away.
he opens his laptop, types random garbage into a terminal window—some half-baked python script he doesn’t even care about. he runs a fake compile just to feel busy, to drown out the way his blood is rushing too fast.
you lean over to whisper to the girl next to you, your laugh spilling out, loud and careless. your hair tosses, and he swears he catches the scent of your perfume drifting past in invisible waves. saccharine, overwhelming, like strawberries dipped in sugar syrup.
his brain short-circuits. he snaps his headphones on, the cord tangling in his haste. not to listen to music. not to block you out.
to replay your giggle.
he’d isolated the audio last night, cleaned it up with a high-pass filter, boosted the mids to make it crystal clear. exported it as a high-quality .wav, tucked it into a folder labeled “audio_ref.” he tells himself it’s for study, just good reference for future projects. but he loops it now, the sound of your laugh layered over faint lo-fi static he added for texture. it’s you, distilled into a three-second clip, filling his skull.
he closes his eyes and pretends you’re saying his name. satoru, you giggle, breathy and soft, like you’re leaning over his shoulder again, watching him work. satoru, you made it feel so real.
the lecture drones on, but he’s not listening. he’s lost in the rhythm of your voice, the way it dips and rises, the way it makes his skin feel too tight. he shifts in his seat, adjusts his hoodie, tries to ignore the heat pooling in his gut. he’s not supposed to want this. not supposed to want you.
but he does.
the thing about addiction is that it never announces itself.
no dramatic thunderclap. no internal monologue screaming, ah yes, now i am a pervert. it’s quiet. insidious. it sinks in like static, crackling at the edges of satoru’s brain until he’s not sure where his old self ends and this new, wretched version begins.
it’s not like he’s not already a pervert who gets off from pixels. this simply wasn’t his brand of perversion.
that night, he stayed up longer than he should’ve. stared at code for so long his ide crashed, the screen flickering to black as if it knew he was wasting his time. not that he got anything done.
he just kept switching tabs—your final cut in vlc, some useless bash script in vscode he pretended to care about, then back to your video, the timeline frozen on that twirl, that gasp. his fingers shook when he closed the laptop, but sleep never came.
and now it’s the next day. mid-afternoon. the sun is doing that thing where it turns his apartment into a blinding box of heat and regret. his ac hums like an old man, wheezing against the sticky air. he’s sprawled in his chair, one leg slung over the armrest, staring at the ceiling fan like it might tell him how to stop.
ping.
another discord notification. he doesn’t even flinch this time. your username glows, and the filename attached makes his stomach do a weird little roll: “try-on2_raw.mov”. his eyes linger on the heart emoji you’ve tacked onto the message, like it’s a personal invitation.
hiii! ty for the last edit, ur a lifesaver <3 can u check and trim this one too? i’m trying smth new but idk if it works… lmk what u think pls!!
he clicks download. no hesitation. doesn’t even pretend to care anymore.
the file loads into his editing software like second nature, the premiere pro interface blooming across his screen. muscle memory. routine.
he’s done this a hundred times—except never like this, never with his pulse hammering in his throat and his mouth already dry.
the video starts the same way as the last—handheld, messy lighting, your voice trailing in from offscreen as you fiddle with the camera angle. no mic, of course not. just raw cam audio, unpolished, real, every breath and rustle amplified. he leans closer, like proximity to the screen will make it less dangerous.
“okay—wait, hold on,” you mutter, slightly out of breath. there’s a plastic rustle, fabric scraping skin, the light jingle of a zipper. he catches the sound of your nails tapping the digicam accidentally, a faint clack-clack that makes him picture your fingers, probably painted some ridiculous color, fumbling in that endearing way you do.
“ugh… come on…” your voice drops, a frustrated huff, low and throaty. “mm—sorry! this one’s hard to pull up.”
then—zipper slides. metal on fabric, slow and deliberate, like it’s teasing him on purpose. you let out a sigh, long, slow, just a little too satisfied, like you’re savoring the release of pressure. the sound coils in his gut, tight and hot.
he freezes.
his mouse stays hovering over the playhead, the cursor trembling slightly. blood is already rushing south, his sweatpants tightening in a way he can’t ignore. his breath catches, shallow and sharp, and the worst part?
you giggle.
“probably got the wrong size,” you say, tugging the dress up higher. the hem catches on your thighs, rising indecently, the fabric clinging to your skin like it’s reluctant to let go. “don’t tell anyone i didn’t try it on in-store first.”
he swallows nothing. jaw tight. the room suddenly feels suffocating, the ac’s hum drowned out by the thud of his own pulse. your lip catches between your teeth, a flash of white against pink gloss, and the camera catches that too, lingers on it like it knows what it’s doing.
you glance at the lens, eyes half-lidded, like you’re waiting for approval, like you’re asking him directly—do you like this?
satoru’s fingers twitch.
one hand stays on the mouse, scrubbing the timeline back three seconds to hear that sigh again. the other hand moves before he can stop it, slipping under his waistband, brushing against the heat of his skin. he’s already hard, achingly so, the kind of hard that makes his head swim.
he wraps his fingers around himself, slow at first, testing, like he’s not sure he’s really doing this again. but the sound of your voice—breathy, teasing—loops in his headphones, and he’s gone.
he strokes himself, deliberate and tight, his grip almost punishing. the video plays on, and you’re stepping into frame now, the dress half-zipped, hugging your curves in a way that makes his throat burn. your thighs shift as you adjust the hem, and he imagines them under his hands, soft and warm, parting just for him.
his thumb swipes over the tip of his cock, slick with precum, and he groans, low and broken, the sound swallowed by the hum of his pc. he pictures your fingers instead, clumsy but eager, your nails grazing his skin as you try to keep up with his rhythm.
he’d guide you, show you how he likes it—fast, rough, no mercy.
you sigh again, and he speeds up, his hand moving in time with the rise and fall of your voice. “this one’s kinda tight,” you murmur, tugging at the neckline, and the fabric stretches, exposing the swell of your chest.
he wants to rip it off, wants to hear you gasp for real, not for the camera but for him. his strokes grow erratic, desperate, the slick sound of his hand filling the room, obscene and unstoppable.
he scrubs the timeline back again, pauses on the frame where your dress slips, where your underwear peeks out—a thin, lacy thing that makes his vision blur. he imagines pulling it aside, imagines the heat of you, the way you’d whimper if he pressed himself inside.
he’s close, too close, his hips twitching up into his hand. the video loops your giggle, that satisfied sigh, and he’s drowning in it, in you.
he pictures you catching him like this, walking into his apartment right now, seeing him with his pants down and his cock in his hand, flushed and leaking. would you laugh? would you blush? would you drop to your knees and let him finish on your lips, glossy and perfect and—
he comes with a muted groan, his head tipping back, eyes screwed shut as his release spills over his fingers, hot and messy. his breath shakes, a ragged exhale that leaves him hollow. the aftershocks pulse through him, and he slumps in his chair, the video still playing, your voice oblivious to the wreckage you’ve caused.
he pauses the frame. your mouth is mid-word, forming the shape of “oops,” lips parted just enough to make his chest ache. he wipes his hand on a paper towel from his desk, crumpled and stained from earlier sins. doesn’t look at himself. doesn’t think.
exports the file without touching a thing. names it “final_edit.mov.” then saves another copy, the raw footage, every sigh and rustle preserved. he names it “jesusfuckingchrist.mp4” and buries it in a folder labeled “misc_ref.”
he tries to normalize it.
“it’s just grading,” he mutters the next time he opens the project, the lie sour on his tongue. “just adjusting white balance.” but the playback bar hasn’t moved from your thighs. he doesn’t touch the colors. not really.
he zooms in under the excuse of checking “grain smoothing,” but it’s just your lip, caught between your teeth, your breath clipped at the edges like you’re holding back.
he tells himself he’s just learning.
every artist has their muse, right? except now he edits to your audio. he used to play podcasts, background noise to keep his brain from spiraling.
now? your breathing is layered into the timeline, a track he’s labeled “vox_ref.” he loops your laugh in reverse, lets it pan from left to right like it’s some surround sound experience.
“this is practice,” he whispers, dragging eq curves around nonsense, boosting the highs until your voice is sharp and intimate. “i’m experimenting with filters.”
right. filters. filters until your voice sounds like it’s right by his ear, like you’re whispering in bed, your breath warm against his skin. he plays a clip of you saying “do you like this one?” over and over, the words detached from context.
he doesn’t even care what you’re referring to anymore. he’s got that part memorized, the way your voice dips, soft and unsure, like you’re asking him to love you.
the next class is worse.
you walk past him in that fuzzy pink shrug thing, one sleeve slipping off your shoulder, and it’s like a bomb goes off in his chest. the fabric clings to you, soft and teasing, and he wants to grab it, pull it down, see how much skin you’ll let him have.
you lean down to plug your charger in, your jeans riding low—too low, the kind of low that makes him wonder how they’re even allowed on campus. he catches a glimpse of your underwear, a flash of lace, and his brain whites out.
he glares at his laptop, scoffs under his breath. “that outfit’s… desperate.” the word feels like a blade, sharp and mean, but it’s all he’s got to keep you at a distance.
your head tilts, innocent, eyes wide like you’re genuinely curious. “you think so?” you say it like you mean it, like you don’t already know the answer, like you haven’t watched your own footage and seen what he’s seen.
he shrugs, keeps scowling, doesn’t look at you. his fingers grip the edge of his laptop too hard, knuckles white. behind the screen, he’s got a paused frame of you licking lip gloss off your thumb, minimized in the corner. it’s been open since he got here.
his file structure is disintegrating. he used to name things with logic—timestamps, project codes, version numbers. now his desktop looks like a manifesto, a digital shrine to his unraveling. “vlog_tryon_final.mov.” “edit_3alt.mp4.” “fuckmeagain_laughcut.mov.” there’s a folder called “NOT work (unless)” that he doesn’t even open anymore, too afraid of what he’ll find.
he tries to draw a line, but it’s blurry. always blurry. he doesn’t know where the edit ends and obsession begins. when he dreams, he dreams about zippers—except they’re not zipzers. they’re your legs, parting slow and deliberate, your breath hitching as he pulls you closer.
a new text lights up his screen:
hey! idk if the last one looks good… should i redo it? it felt kinda awkward lol sorry T_T
you sound insecure, unsure, your words dripping with that self-conscious charm that makes his chest hurt. he stares at the message, his thumb hovering over the keyboard, his mind spiraling.
you don’t know, do you? you don’t know what you’re doing to him, how your voice alone is enough to make him hard again.
he types:
looks clean. don’t worry about it.
satoru watches the word clean sit there like a fucking lie. his dick twitches, traitor that it is.
he hates himself.
but he opens the raw file again. scrubs through, frame by frame, until he finds that timestamp—where you moan, soft and accidental, like you didn’t mean to let it slip. he watches it, his headphones sealing him in with the sound of you. he exports that single second, names it “moan_finalgodhelpme.mp4,” and tucks it away like a secret he’ll never confess.
the timeline sits open, your frozen frame staring back at him. he doesn’t close it. doesn’t want to.
it starts with static in his skull.
not the loud, electric kind that chokes you up or begs to be noticed. it’s quiet. a whir, like an old fan that never shuts off, humming behind his thoughts. when satoru drags his mouse across the screen and sees your name still on the folder, it buzzes—faint, familiar, a sickness with your scent.
he changes the name from “NOT work (unless)” to “ARCHIVE_21,” moves it to a different directory, pretends it’s work, or dead, or both. but the static doesn’t stop. it clings, sticky and warm, like your laugh looping in his headphones.
it doesn’t help.
not when he dreams in highlighter gloss and those half-bitten whines you make when stretching, your body arching just so. not when he wakes up rutting into damp sheets, mouthing your name like a damn prayer, his hips jerking against nothing. the shame burns, but it’s not enough to make him stop.
satoru’s trying.
really.
he takes up freelance gigs, edits wedding footage for some guy he hasn’t spoken to since second year. overlays cheesy filters, mutes the groom’s ugly laugh, syncs the vows to some overused acoustic track. it’s clean. respectable. sterile enough to make him itch, like he’s wearing someone else’s skin. but the folder’s still there, buried in his drive like it knows he’ll come back.
2:03 a.m.
his inbox pings, a sharp sound that cuts through the drone of his pc fans. your name lights up the screen, and his chest tightens before he even reads the message.
hiii satoru!! sorry for the late send, been sooo busy <3 can u take a look at this haul vid? i tried smth spicy but idk if it’s too much… lmk what u think pretty pls!!
march haul (raw).mp4
he knows he shouldn’t. there’s no logical reason, no business context, just the weight of your words—spicy, pretty pls—sinking into his gut. but his hands move on their own, clicking download, the progress bar filling like a fuse burning down.
click.
of course he does.
the video starts soft, your bedroom light diffused to a golden haze, casting shadows that dance across rumpled sheets. it looks like you’ve been tossing in them all day, the fabric creased and inviting.
you’re in lace—barely. something soft pink and flimsy, a slip of fabric that clings to your curves like it’s begging to be torn off.
your thigh’s out, one leg bent just enough to draw his eye, and the camera’s angled low, too low, like you meant to frame it this way.
“god, i hope this one fits…” your voice is breathy, a little strained, like you’re fighting the fabric. you adjust a strap, your fingers lingering on the lace, and your lip catches between your teeth, glossy and pink, a casual gesture that’s anything but. his breath stutters, a sharp inhale that burns his throat.
“oops, sorry—too much cleavage?” you laugh, not to yourself but at him.
he knows it.
his cock knows it, twitching against the seam of his sweatpants. the screen shakes as you set the camera on something unsteady—a stack of books, maybe—and it rocks just as you turn around, hips swaying, your ass hugged by that tiny thong, the lace cutting into your skin like a claim. you glance back over your shoulder, smirk poised like a dagger, eyes glinting in the soft light.
“i bet you’d pause right here, wouldn’t you?”
he does.
the video cuts mid-breath, and he doesn’t hear the silence. he’s frozen, hand halfway down, brain wiped clean. the frame lingers on your ass, the curve of it framed by lace, and his mouth is dry, his pulse hammering so loud it drowns out the static.
ping.
march haul (real).mp4
oops. wrong send lol. this is the real one!
his screen is still painted with the freeze-frame of your ass. his dick’s straining so hard it aches, a dull throb that makes him shift in his chair. he doesn’t respond, doesn’t move for a full minute, just stares at the message, the word oops taunting him. then—
he saves both files. drags them into “ARCHIVE_21” with a trembling cursor, his fingers clumsy on the trackpad. he opens the raw one again, slower this time, one hand on his lap, the other fisting his sheets until the fabric creaks.
you’re back on screen, adjusting the strap again, your laugh curling through his headphones like smoke. his hand slips under his waistband, and he’s already leaking, the tip slick and sensitive as he grips himself.
he strokes slow, deliberate, savoring the friction, but his mind’s elsewhere—on the hentai he’s spent years jerking off to, the doujins with dog-eared pages and cum-stained corners.
he pictures you like those girls, bent over and begging, your lace thong pushed to the side as he fucks you from behind, your moans louder, needier, than anything you’ve let slip on camera.
he imagines pinning you to those rumpled sheets, your thighs trembling under his hands, your ass bouncing with every thrust. no teasing giggles, no coy glances—just you, fucked out and whimpering, his name on your lips as he buries himself deep, so deep you can’t think.
his hand speeds up, the slick sound obscene in the quiet of his room. he scrubs the timeline back, pauses on the moment you turn, your smirk sharp and knowing.
he wants to wipe it off, wants to fuck you until you’re too wrecked to smile, until you’re clawing at the sheets and sobbing his name. he imagines your cunt, tight and wet, gripping him as he pounds into you, the lace of your thong rubbing raw against his skin.
it’s not enough to watch you anymore, not enough to stroke himself to your voice—he wants to ruin you, wants to feel you break under him, wants to make you his in a way those 2d girls never could.
he cums with a low, breathy whisper of your name, his hips jerking up into his hand. it’s intense, almost painful, spilling over his fingers and onto the hem of his shirt.
his chest heaves, his vision blurring as he slumps back, the video still playing, your laugh oblivious to the mess he’s become. he opens it again, doesn’t touch himself this time—just watches, memorizes, eyes glassy and mouth parted.
at one point, he swears he moans with you, a soft sound that slips out unbidden, his body betraying him even when he’s spent. when he edits the “real” file, he’s a machine. no stutters, no slips, just sharp keystrokes and surgical cuts, trimming shaky frames and boosting your voice until it’s crisp.
the guilt claws at him, a dull ache in his chest, but it only makes the next orgasm worse—and better. he exports it, names it “haul_march_final.mov,” and saves the raw file to a new subfolder: “stills_ref.” he doesn’t name the second copy. doesn’t need to. it’s just for him.
he plays it cool in class. “wow. another fit straight outta your grandma’s closet,” he scoffs as you pass, voice dripping with mockery, lips curling into something lazy and mean.
but his gaze flickers—just once, low and quick, like he’s checking for danger. and there it is. a flash of soft pink lace against the curve of your thigh as you shift your bag higher up your shoulder. just a sliver. deliberate.
he knows that lace. knows it from the raw footage, from the way it hugged your skin under golden light. his smirk falters for half a second, a crack in his armor.
you turn your head, slow as syrup, and smile at him over your shoulder. it’s airy, innocent, ditzy enough to play dumb, poisonous enough to feel like a threat. “mm? that bad, huh?” your voice is light, but your eyes linger a moment too long, sharp and knowing, like you’re peeling him open.
you take your seat two rows away, crossing one leg over the other with careful grace. your skirt rides up, just enough to show the edge of that lace again, and your fingers toy absentmindedly with the hem, brushing the fabric like it’s a game.
he doesn’t blink.
he knows what’s under that skirt, knows the way that lace bites into your skin when you move just like that. he’s seen it in soft lighting, tangled with shadows and sighs. he knows, and you know, and neither of you say a word.
he can’t breathe.
his hand trembles as he grips his pen, scrawling nonsense on the corner of his notes—random numbers, jagged lines, anything to keep his fingers busy.
someone’s asking a question about identity and performance, something about how we present ourselves versus how we wish to be perceived, and satoru’s already halfway to standing.
“sorry. washroom.” his voice cracks halfway through the lie, too sharp, too rushed.
satoru stumbles into the men’s room like he’s escaping a crime scene, the door clicking shut behind him. palm flat against cold tile, forehead pressed to the inside of his wrist, he tries to breathe, tries to think of anything else—code, deadlines, the wedding edit he’s behind on.
but it’s you.
always you. your smile, your laugh, the lace peeking out like a taunt.
he’s already hard, already leaking, the front of his jeans tight and unforgiving. he fumbles with the button, shoves them down just enough, and grips himself, his hand shaking as he strokes.
he closes his eyes and sees you—not the you in class, not the you playing dumb, but the you from his fantasies, the you he’s built from hentai panels and late-night desperation. he imagines you on your knees, lace thong pulled down, your cunt glistening as he fucks you against the bathroom sink.
no giggles, no teasing—just raw, desperate need, your moans echoing off the tiles as he slams into you, his hands bruising your hips, your body arching to take him deeper.
he wants you messy, wants you marked, wants to fill you until you’re dripping, until you’re his in a way that’s permanent.
he strokes faster, his breath hitching, his teeth sinking into his knuckles to muffle the groan clawing up his throat. he cums hard, too fast, his knees buckling as it spills over his hand, hot and shameful. he shakes, gasping, his forehead slick against the tile, and thinks of lace. thinks of lip gloss. thinks of your voice saying “oops” like it’s a sin.
it doesn’t take long for his desktop to become an altar.
the background’s still you, a freeze-frame from the first video, your lip gloss shimmering and fingers caught mid-twist in your hair. he tells himself it’s temporary, just a visual reference.
some nights, he replays a single frame just to watch your mouth form the word “fuck,” slows it down, isolates the syllables, pretends you’re saying his name instead.
the worst part?
you’re still pretending nothing’s changed. still calling them “favors,” still sending content like it’s work, like it’s nothing.
but your outfits are shorter, your giggles stick to the air longer, your eyes linger like you’re testing something. and when you purr, “you’re sooo good at this, satoru,” with that saccharine lilt, your voice curling around his name like a caress, he bites the inside of his cheek just to keep quiet. fists the sheets at night and prays.
he moans your name in the dark, face hot with shame, and hates how much he wants you to hear it.
satoru’s become sleep-deprived, dark smudges nesting beneath his eyes like fingerprints left behind by guilt or obsession or both. he wears his glasses more lately, less out of need and more as a buffer between him and the world—between him and you.
the lenses catch the glow of his new triple-monitor setup, a sleek beast he told himself was for coding, for editing, for multitasking. not for keeping your videos looping on the side monitor while he pretends to work on the main one. not for that at all.
your folder’s pinned in quick access, a permanent fixture in his file explorer. he keeps it open in the background at all times, a digital pulse that hums alongside his pc fans. second nature now, like breathing or wanting. not unlike a shrine.
in class, he pretends to take notes, his stylus scratching nonsense on his tablet. he’s not. he’s watching a gif on his phone, hidden under the desk—a loop of your tongue dragging slow across lip gloss, eyes soft with focus like you’re painting yourself pretty just for him. the gif’s only three seconds, but he’s memorized every frame, every flicker of your lashes. his thumb swipes to replay it, again, again, until his vision blurs.
ctrl+shift+eject brain.exe.
three days pass, and you haven’t messaged. he checks your chat thread more than he breathes—opens, closes, re-opens, scrolling through your old texts like they’ll reveal something new. every flicker of hope is a false start, a phantom ping that makes his chest lurch. he’s pathetic, he knows it, but knowing doesn’t stop the itch.
then:
ping.
april haul (suits).mov
hii satoru!! new haul vid for u to check <3 tried some swimsuits this time, hope it’s not too boring to trim hehe. lmk what u think!!”
he nearly drops his phone, his thumb smudging the screen as he fumbles to download. his new setup hums to life, the main monitor flashing with code he hasn’t touched in hours, the side monitor already open to your folder.
he drags the file into premiere, the timeline blooming across the screen, but his eyes are on the raw video, already playing on the right monitor, your voice spilling through his headphones like honey.
the video’s different this time. the camera’s lower, like it’s been left on a desk or shelf, pointing slightly upward to frame you from your knees to just above your head. your bed makes a cozy blur in the background, sheets tangled like an invitation.
you’re in a bikini top that isn’t trying very hard to stay on, thin strings knotted loosely at your neck and back, the fabric barely containing you. “mmm. does this scream summer, or slut?” you giggle, feigned innocence like frosting over heat, your voice curling around the words like you know exactly what they’ll do to him.
you play with the strings at your chest, tugging, adjusting, your fingers brushing the swell of your breasts. then, softer, breathier, to the lens: “baby, help me pick…”
baby.
it breaks him all over again, a crack that runs straight through his chest. his cock twitches, already hard, straining against his boxers.
everything after that gets softer, lazier, dangerous in how intimate it feels. there’s no performative energy now—just casual, candid seduction, your movements slow, like you’re not hurrying for anyone. like you know exactly who’s watching and how long he’ll linger.
when you shrug a dress off your shoulders, you sigh, the sound catching in your throat. when you twist to adjust a strap, you hum, low and absentminded. and when you struggle with a clasp at your back, your fingers fumbling, you moan—soft, unintentional, a sound that slips out like it surprised even you.
satoru’s thumb slams the spacebar, pausing the video, rewinding three seconds to hear it again. he watches the way your lips part, the way your brows twitch, the way your body shifts like you’re chasing the sensation.
he’s already leaking, his boxers damp as he shoves them down, his hand wrapping around himself. the side monitor loops the raw footage, your moan playing over and over, while the main monitor holds the paused frame of your parted lips. he strokes slow at first, his grip tight, his thumb swiping over the tip where he’s slick and sensitive.
his mind slips to the doujins he’s hoarded, the hentai he’s spent years chasing—the girls with flushed cheeks and desperate eyes, fucked raw and begging for more. but now it’s you, not some inked fantasy, and it’s so much filthier.
he imagines you sprawled across your bed, that bikini top ripped off, your thighs spread wide as he fucks you deep, relentless, your cunt clenching around him as you sob his name. no teasing, no giggles—just you, wrecked and dripping, your nails clawing his back as he takes you again and again, each thrust harder, messier, until you’re nothing but his.
his hand speeds up, the slick sound loud in his room, mixing with your looped moan. he wants you pinned beneath him, wants to feel you squirm, wants to fuck you until the bed creaks and your voice breaks, until you’re begging like those hentai girls, your glossed lips trembling as you say his name—satoru, please, more.
he imagines filling you, his cum leaking down your thighs, your body marked by him in ways he can’t unsee. it’s not enough to watch, not enough to stroke—he wants to own you, wants to make you his in every way those 2d fantasies taught him to crave.
he cums hard, forehead pressed to his desk, a low groan tearing from his throat as it spills over his hand, his keyboard, the edge of his new setup. his breath is ragged, like he’s run a marathon, his glasses fogging slightly as he gasps.
the side monitor still plays, your voice oblivious, your moan looping like a hymn. he doesn’t stop the video, just slumps back, spent and shaking, and watches again, his hand twitching like it’s not done.
it doesn’t take long for his room to reek of sweat and sin.
he edits shirtless now, sometimes in boxers, always hard, always leaking. every file’s renamed with trembling hands: “wifey_take7.mov.” “wifey_raw.mp4.”
he syncs your sighs to his lo-fi playlist, turns it into a lullaby, falls asleep to the sound of your breath. sometimes he slows your voice just to hear “baby” dragged out into velvet, makes gifs of your hands skimming your hips, kisses the screen when he’s drunk enough to forget shame.
you, on the other hand, don’t break character.
in class, you chew your pen and lean forward, the arch of your spine exact, your cleavage subtle—barely a tease, just enough to make his throat tighten. he looks away with a clenched jaw, adjusts himself under the desk, twice, his jeans unforgiving.
you whisper to a friend and giggle, and he lipreads, thinks he sees the words “can’t wait,” but maybe he’s hallucinating, maybe not. it doesn’t matter.
he starts responding to the clips aloud.
“fuck yes, that one.” “spin again, baby.” sometimes he mumbles your name like a prayer, sometimes he chokes it into his pillow. every orgasm has your name carved into it, a brand he can’t erase.
one night, he opens a file to edit, drags it into premiere, but he doesn’t touch it. just watches, headphones in, barely breathing. not a content creator now, not a student, not even a man—just a creature of need, and you his ritual, his muse, his goddess.
the screen shows you adjusting the straps of a silky babydoll, the lighting warm, your thighs bare, half-tucked under you as you sit prettily at the edge of your bed.
“okay, so this one’s… like, totally giving ‘come to bed’ energy, right?” you giggle, voice light, teeth sinking into your glossed lip as you bounce once, soft and natural, the fabric barely covering your chest.
satoru groans low in his throat, not even trying to hide it. “it’s giving bend over,” he mutters, lips twitching, his side monitor looping the raw footage, his main screen frozen on your smile. “fuck, look at you…”
you reach behind you, struggle with the clasp, wiggle your shoulders like you’re teasing whoever’s behind the camera. “oof. that’s tight… should i size up?” a breathy laugh follows, your sigh melting into it.
he licks his lips, your audio crystal-clear in his headphones. you’re right there, talking to him. “nah, baby,” he croons, eyes fixed on the curve of your spine as you turn. “tight’s perfect. keeps the goods in place.”
you blow a kiss at the lens. “hope you’re not bored yet,” you say with a wink. “i saved the cutest for last…”
you bend off-frame, your ass peeking just above the edge of the bed, round and inviting in cotton panties with lace trim, and when you rise again, your hands hold something sheer and tiny. “tadaaa,” you whisper, eyes glinting with mischief. “this one’s for my favorite viewer.”
00:05:46—satoru slams the shortcut, timestamp saved. a second later, he screenshots, then again, then again, frame by frame, until he finds the exact one where your lip’s caught between your teeth and your ass is still halfway in the air.
“fucking perfect,” he mutters, breath uneven. he pulls the image up on his main screen, zooms in, sharpens it, runs it through noise reduction. the side monitor loops the raw video, your voice sweet and teasing, while the right monitor plays a gif of your earlier moan, your lips parted in that soft, accidental sound.
his hand’s already moving, shoving his boxers down, his cock springing free, hard and leaking like it’s been waiting for this.
he grips himself, rough and urgent, no pretense of patience. the new setup’s perfect—your video on the side, his code on the main screen like he’s working, but it’s all you, every pixel, every sound.
he strokes in time with your giggle, his eyes flicking between the gif of your moan and the screenshot of your ass, his mind spiraling into the filthiest corners of his hentai-soaked brain.
he imagines you on that bed, face down, ass up, the babydoll hiked to your waist as he fucks you so hard the headboard cracks. he wants you screaming, wants your cunt pulsing around him, wants to pull your hair and make you look at him as he fills you, over and over, until you’re a mess, until you’re his completely.
his strokes are frantic, his breath hitching, his hips bucking into his hand. he pictures you tied to the bed, like that one doujin he read last month, your wrists bound with those same bikini strings, your thighs trembling as he fucks you through one orgasm into the next.
he wants to cum inside you, wants to watch it drip out, wants to push it back in with his fingers and make you lick them clean. it’s not enough to jerk off anymore, not enough to dream—he wants to break you, wants to make you real, wants to fuck you until you’re as addicted to him as he is to you.
he cums with a choked growl, his head tipping back, glasses slipping down his nose as it spills over his hand, his desk, the sticky mess splattering his keyboard.
he’s shaking, gasping, his chest heaving as the side monitor loops your voice, your “baby” purring like a mantra. his wrist’s sticky, his room a haze of sweat and shame, but he doesn’t care. he’s not even really here.
you’re everywhere now—three monitors, three altars, your image burned into his retinas. he’d worship on his knees if you asked.
the next day, another file:
april haul (closeups).mp4
sorry! idk if this one’s helpful but i liked the shots hehe
he doesn’t unzip his pants. doesn’t need to. he’s already throbbing from the inside out, his body reacting to your name alone. he clicks, watches, kneels, and whispers your name like a benediction, the static in his skull louder than ever.
it starts with a ping.
innocuous. a single pixel shift on the main monitor mid-code, just as satoru’s debugging a script for a deadline he already missed. his side monitor hums with your last video, paused on that frame where your lip’s caught between your teeth, and the third monitor’s open to a half-finished render he hasn’t touched in days. he glances lazily at the notification, expecting another reminder from suguru to shower or eat—
but no. it’s you.
hey… do u do filming too?
his fingers freeze. heart jams, a dull thud in his chest. the cursor blinks, waiting, mocking. he doesn’t think. doesn’t breathe. his glasses slip down his nose, and he doesn’t fix them. the words burn into his retinas, and his cock twitches before he can process why.
yeah. totally. what kind of shoot?
he sends it, his thumb trembling over the enter key. no reply. not for five whole minutes. the wait is a crucifixion, each second stretching into eternity. he keeps opening and closing the chat, rereading your words like they might shift into something dirtier, something more.
his triple-monitor setup glows, your frozen frame on the side monitor staring at him, lips parted, eyes glinting. he’s already leaking in his pants, a damp spot spreading against his thigh.
then:
just a casual thing. home setup. come over?
he reads it twice. three times. his breath catches, sharp and shallow, like he’s been punched. come over. your dorm. your space. he’s hard, achingly so, his boxers tight and unforgiving. he doesn’t reply, just slams his laptop shut, grabs his camera bag, and stumbles out the door.
he shows up twenty minutes later, barely remembered to wear deodorant, definitely forgot his dignity. his high-end sony alpha mirrorless—loaded with a lens that costs more than most people’s rent—bounces against his chest as he knocks. his palms are slick, his glasses fogging slightly from the heat of his own nerves.
you open the door with a giggle, wrapped in a pastel pink robe that might as well be air. it clings to the curve of your waist, parts at the thigh, revealing soft skin that makes his throat burn. your hair’s still damp, sticking to your collarbones, and the scent of vanilla lotion hits him like a drug. “thanks for coming! i’m kinda nervous…”
he wants to bark out same, but his jaw locks. he swallows instead, the motion too loud in his ears. “no problem.” his voice is gravel, like he’s choking on his own want. he steps inside, and your dorm swallows him whole—warm, cutesy, a pastel fever dream of plush throw pillows, fairy lights, and a pink velvet couch that looks too soft, too inviting.
he’s already imagining you bent over it, your robe hiked up, your moans echoing off the walls. it smells like you sprayed your strawberry perfume over every surface, dizzying, suffocating. his glasses fog again.
he sets up the tripod with shaking hands, the sony’s weight grounding him just enough to keep from falling apart. you bounce around the living room, humming, fluffing pillows on the couch, fixing your gloss in a heart-shaped mirror propped against a shelf.
“does this lighting make me look washed out?” you ask, stepping back, tilting your head. then you bend to adjust a lamp, and your robe parts just enough to reveal the gentle curve of your ass, bare except for a sliver of lace.
he sees. pretends he didn’t. fumbles the lens cap, twice, the plastic clattering to the floor. his face burns, but he keeps his eyes on the camera, adjusting settings he doesn’t need to touch.
you brush past him again and again, your bare arm glancing his, silk whispering across his knuckles when you pass. he smells shampoo in the air, thick and sweet, and it’s you, all you, sinking into his lungs. “you nervous?” you tease, voice light, a giggle curling at the edges.
he scoffs, wiping his palm against his jeans, the denim rough against his slick skin. “pfft. nah. i’ve filmed worse.” a lie, bold and brittle, his voice too tight to sell it.
“worse than me?” you pout, stepping closer, close enough that he can feel the warmth of your breath. “ouch.”
“i didn’t say that.” his voice cracks, a hairline fracture. he’s too aware of you, of the way your robe slips an inch, of the way your eyes glint like you’re playing with him.
you tilt your head, wide-eyed, all fake innocence. “sooo… you have filmed pretty girls before?”
he falters, breath stuttering in his chest. he’s a virgin, hasn’t touched a girl in years, hasn’t wanted to—not when hentai’s been enough, when doujins have been his only lovers. but you’re real, and you’re here, and you’re breaking him.
“no one like you,” he says, unfiltered, raw, the words slipping out before he can stop them.
your lips curl, slow and sweet, a smile that says i know. “hm. figured.”
you disappear into your bedroom for a few minutes, the door clicking shut. he pretends to adjust the white balance, tweaking settings on the sony that are already perfect, but really he’s staring at the door like it owes him salvation.
his cock’s throbbing, a dull ache that won’t quit, and he shifts, trying to ease the pressure. the living room feels too small, the pink couch too soft, the fairy lights too intimate. he’s imagining you sprawled across that couch, your robe gone, your thighs spread, his camera capturing every gasp.
the door opens. you emerge. lingerie set, pale and sheer, a mini skirt that barely qualifies, lip gloss freshly reapplied. you look like a doll, saccharine and sinful, every curve a taunt. “can you help me zip this?” you turn, bare back exposed, the zipper halfway up, your spine a perfect line that begs to be touched.
he steps forward, too close, his exhale brushing your shoulder. his fingers graze your skin—soft, warm, real—and you shiver, a small, deliberate tremor. he pulls the zipper up with trembling hands, the metal catching once, his breathing uneven. the distance between you shatters into nothing, the air thick with static.
“you’re doing this on purpose,” he rasps, low in your ear, his voice rough with want.
“doing what?” you whisper, fake innocence thick as honey, your head tilting just enough to catch his eye.
you look back at him, lashes fluttering, lips parted, glossy and pink. he breaks.
“fuck.”
he grabs you, his hands rough on your hips, your mouths crashing together—teeth, tongue, gasps. your lip gloss smears against his cheek, sweet and sticky, and he groans into the kiss, devouring you.
you moan into his mouth, legs wrapping around his hips as he lifts you onto the counter, the edge biting into your thighs. you’re silk and heat and sin beneath his hands, and he’s forgotten everything else—his camera, his code, his shame. only you exist now.
you feel his hard-on through his jeans, pressed against your thighs, and he’s panting, his breath stuttering against your skin as he kisses down your jaw, your neck, the ridge of your spine. his mouth is everywhere, like he’s starved, like he’s trying to memorize you with his tongue.
his glasses slip down, and he grins against your collarbone. “need to get a better look,” he mutters, a flimsy excuse to lean closer, until the fog of his breath warms your skin. he bites your collarbone, hard, groaning when he leaves a mark. “wanna see that in playback.”
he drops to his knees without hesitation, a virgin’s worship, reverence born from years of hentai and nothing else. his fingers dig into your thighs, spreading them wide, and he groans like he’s just found salvation. he runs his tongue along the inner part first, slow and teasing, so close to the lace of your panties but not touching what you want.
you try to close your legs, but he forces them open, his grip bruising, his mouth finding the wet spot through the fabric. “fuck, you’re soaked,” he growls, voice muffled, his tongue dragging heavy and slow, the lace rough against your clit. “been wet for me this whole time, huh? fuckin’ tease.”
you whimper, hips bucking, and he moans into you, the vibration making you gasp. he licks through the panties, relentless, his glasses slipping halfway down his nose but he doesn’t care.
“you taste better than i dreamed,” he says, his voice hoarse, hentai dialogue spilling out like it’s natural. he sucks at the fabric, tongue pressing harder, and you’re trembling, your hands fisting his hair as you grind against his face. he’s messy, desperate, his moans louder than yours, like he’s the one about to cum. you do, hard, a cry tearing from your throat as you shudder against his mouth, and he doesn’t stop, lapping at the soaked lace like it’s his last meal.
he presses his cheek to your thigh, sticky and glistening, looking up at you with glassy eyes. “first one’s mine,” he says, grinding his hips into the floor, his jeans tight with his own need. you don’t think he even realizes he’s doing it. he spreads you open with his fingers, peeling the panties aside, watching your hole twitch with a hunger that makes his mouth water.
“look at that,” he murmurs, almost to himself, his voice dripping with awe. “fuckin’ perfect.” he slides two fingers in, slow at first, then deeper, curling them just right, like he’s memorized every doujin panel that showed him how. “shit—i’ve seen this in hentai but it’s better. fuck, it’s real.”
his fingers pump, slick and steady, and you’re moaning, head thrown back, the counter digging into your hips. he adds a third, stretching you, his free hand jerking himself through his jeans, matching the pace of his fingers inside you. “so tight, baby. you’re gonna feel so good around my cock.”
he spits on your pussy, a quick, filthy gesture, his eyes locked on yours as it drips down. “they never show that part right in hentai. had to test it myself.” you moan, loud and broken, and he moans louder, his fingers slipping out with a wet squelch. he licks them clean, slow, eyes fluttering shut like he’s savoring you. “fuck—want it all.”
he stands, trembling, his jeans tented painfully. “can i?” his voice is small, almost pleading, a crack in his bravado. you nod, and he fumbles with his belt, shoving his jeans down just enough. he lines himself up, his cock thick and leaking, the tip brushing your entrance. “you’re so warm—holy shit—you’re squeezing me—fuck—”
he slides in, slow at first, gasping as you take him, your cunt tight and slick around him. he’s a virgin, but he knows this, knows the rhythm from years of jerking off to scenes just like this. he freezes, trying not to cum, his glasses fogging as he pants. you clench down, deliberate, and he slaps your thigh, a quick, sharp sting that earns him a whine.
“don’t—fuck, don’t do that yet.”
he pulls out, just to slam back in, harder, the counter creaking under you. his rhythm’s sloppy, desperate, but he finds it, each thrust deeper, rougher. “look at you,” he growls, his voice pure filth, hentai dialogue spilling free. “taking my cock like a good little slut. you love this, don’t you? fuckin’ made for me.” he licks the tears running down your cheek, his tongue hot and greedy. “crying already? baby, i’m not even close to done.”
you moan his name, and he loses it, his thrusts turning frantic, messy, like he’s trying to ruin you. “film it. show me what you see,” you gasp, and he fumbles for his phone, almost dropping it with how hard he’s shaking.
the camera app opens in a blur of fingers, then steadies, the lens catching you spread wide beneath him, thighs trembling, pussy stuffed full of his cock. he holds it there, watching the way you flutter around him, his breath ragged. “watch this later and see how ruined you look, baby,” he pants, voice hoarse, wild.
he leans in, still recording, whispering filth against your ear. “that’s right. take it. cry for me. i want you loud.” his other hand drags the mic closer, the sony’s external recorder capturing every slick thrust, every broken sob, every wet squelch, loud and obscene.
he fucks you harder, the counter shaking, your tits bouncing with each thrust. “gonna fuck you on every piece of furniture in here,” he growls, his voice low, unhinged. “that couch? gonna bend you over it. that table? gonna spread you wide. your bed? gonna fill you till you’re screaming.”
you clench around him, and he groans, his hips stuttering. “fuck, you like that? you want me to wreck you everywhere, don’t you?” you nod, gasping, and he slaps your thigh again, harder, leaving a red mark. “say it, baby. tell me you want it.”
“i want it,” you whimper, voice breaking, and he grins, feral, his thrusts turning punishing. you cum again, a shuddering mess, your cry echoing in the mic as your cunt pulses around him, slick dripping down your thighs. he doesn’t stop, doesn’t slow, his cock throbbing as he fucks you through it.
“gonna fill you up,” he pants, his voice cracking, hentai fantasies spilling out. “gonna cum so deep you’ll feel me for days. you want that, don’t you? want my cum dripping out of you?”
you nod, moaning, and he loses it, slamming into you one last time as he cums, a guttural groan tearing from his throat. it’s hot, messy, spilling inside you, and he keeps thrusting, shallow and desperate, like he’s trying to push it deeper.
satoru doesn’t stop.
in fact, he lifts you, his arms wrapping under your thighs like you’re weightless, his cock still buried inside you, slick and pulsing. your head lolls against his shoulder, your breath hot against his neck, and he groans, low and guttural, as he carries you toward your bedroom.
the air shifts as he crosses the threshold, your perfume hitting him harder here—floral and sugary, the same scent that clings to your pillow, your wrist, your everything. it’s thicker in this room, curling around him like a trap, and he kicks the door shut behind him, the click loud in the quiet.
he pushes you toward the vanity, your back meeting the cool glass of the mirror with a soft thud. he bends you over it, slow and deliberate, his hands guiding your hips until your cheek presses against the surface, your breath fogging the reflection.
“look at you,” he groans, angling his phone to capture the scene—your flushed face, your glossed lips parted, your eyes half-lidded in the mirror as you whine in embarassment.
“pretty little thing, still trying to act innocent.” his voice is rough, edged with hunger, and he shifts his hips, thrusting shallowly, keeping you pinned, reaching for your lip gloss.
you mumble something, a weak protest or plea, but he shuts it up with a swipe of your lip gloss across your mouth, his hand trembling as he paints your lips pink, the applicator slick and messy.
“perfect,” he says, pulling back just enough to admire the shine, the way it catches the light. then he pushes in again, deeper, and you both moan, the sound mingling in the air, caught by the sony’s mic still recording from the tripod in the corner.
he kisses you messily—gloss smearing, lips hungry, teeth clashing as he grinds his hips, slow and torturous, never breaking the rhythm. the camera stays on, the phone propped against a perfume bottle, capturing every gasp, every shudder.
“taste so fuckin’ good,” he mutters against your mouth, his tongue chasing the sticky sweetness. “gonna kiss you till you’re dripping everywhere.”
satoru lays you on the bed next, gentle but urgent, his hands shaking as he props his phone against a stack of books on your nightstand, the camera app open, framing you perfectly—your body sprawled across the pastel sheets, thighs parted, lingerie barely clinging to your skin, the sheer fabric of your top stretched tight over your chest, the mini skirt hiked up to expose the lace of your panties.
he climbs over you, his glasses slipping down his nose, and pushes your legs up, hooking them over his shoulders, the angle forcing you open, vulnerable.
“fuck, you feel like heaven,” he says, voice cracking, almost reverent, as he slides back inside you, slow and deep, the heat of you pulling a groan from his throat. “i’m never gonna stop, baby.”
each thrust is deliberate, his hips rolling to hit that spot that makes you arch, your nails raking down his arms, leaving red trails he’ll stare at later.
he kisses you through it, his mouth sloppy and desperate, swallowing your moans like they’re his lifeline. the bed creaks under you, the fairy lights casting a soft glow over your tear-streaked face, and he’s lost in it, in the way you clench around him, so tight it’s like you’re made for him.
“so fuckin’ perfect,” he pants, his lips brushing your ear, his breath hot and uneven. “taking my cock like you were born for it.”
he tugs at the straps of your lingerie top, pulling it down until your tits spill free, the sheer fabric catching under them, and he groans, his mouth latching onto a nipple, sucking hard until you whimper, your hips bucking against him.
but it doesn’t last—he needs more, needs to see you break in ways he’s only imagined in the dark of his room, his hand on his cock and your videos on loop.
he pulls out, his dick slick and throbbing, and grabs your hips, flipping you with a low grunt. he drags you up by the waist, positioning you on your knees, your ass high, your face pressed into the sheets, the skirt still bunched around your hips. his hand slides up your spine, pushing your chest down, arching you just right, and he yanks the lace panties to the side, not bothering to take them off.
“this is what you get for teasing me all these days,” he growls, his voice unhinged, as he lines himself up and thrusts in, hard and deep, the slap of skin sharp in the quiet room.
you whimper, muffled against the pillow, and he fucks harder, each thrust rocking you forward, the bedframe rattling, your moans spilling free despite the fabric. his phone’s still recording, propped precariously, catching every angle—your arched back, your trembling thighs, the way his cock disappears into you with every brutal snap of his hips.
“look at that pussy,” he says, his free hand gripping your ass, spreading you open for the camera. “so greedy, swallowing me whole. you love this, don’t you?” he tugs your hair, pulling your head back, forcing your cries to echo. “louder, baby. let the whole fuckin’ dorm hear you.”
he slows, just to torment you, his hips grinding deep, making you squirm, your overstimulated body shaking under him. you’re teary, sobs catching in your throat, but he doesn’t care—he wants you loud, wants you broken. he leans down, his chest pressed to your back, and bites your shoulder, hard enough to leave a mark.
“cry for me,” he whispers, his voice rough, his hand slipping around to pinch your nipple, twisting until you gasp. “wanna hear you fall apart.” he pulls out, leaving you empty, and you whine, a desperate, keening sound that makes him smirk.
“patience, princess,” he mocks, slapping your ass lightly, the sting making you clench around nothing.
satoru guides you up, turning you to face him, and pushes you back onto the bed, climbing over you. “wanna see you ride me,” he says, lying back against the headboard, his hands gripping your hips as you straddle him. he tugs the skirt off completely, tossing it aside, leaving you in just the stretched-out lingerie top and soaked panties.
“bounce,” he growls, his eyes locked on where you sink down onto him, slow and deliberate, your cunt stretching around him as you take him inch by inch. “show the camera how you fuck me.”
his phone’s angled to catch it all—your tits bouncing, still half-caught in the sheer fabric, your thighs trembling, the way you gasp every time you drop down, taking him to the hilt.
you move, your hips rolling, your hands braced on his chest, and he’s sweating, his glasses slipping, his breath ragged. he doesn’t let you slow, his hands lifting you, slamming you back down, making you take him deeper. “that’s it,” he says, voice hoarse, his fingers digging into your ass, leaving bruises. “fuck yourself on my cock. show me how bad you need it.”
you’re sobbing now, tears streaming down your cheeks, but you keep going, your moans loud and broken, your body shaking from the overstimulation. he reaches up, ripping the lingerie top off completely, the fabric tearing with a sharp sound, and gropes your tits, squeezing hard, his thumbs brushing your nipples until you shudder.
“these are mine now,” he says, his voice pure filth. “gonna mark ‘em up so you can’t hide.”
he’s close, too close, but he’s not done.
he pushes you off, gentle but firm, and stands, pulling you with him toward the full-length mirror by your closet. he spins you, pressing your chest to the glass, your hands splaying against it, your tear-streaked reflection staring back.
he kicks your legs apart, his cock nudging your entrance, and slides in, slow and deep, his breath hot against your ear. “look at you,” he says, his lips brushing your neck, his hands caging you against the mirror. “look at my cock ruining your pussy.”
he thrusts, slow at first, watching your reflection—your tears, your drool, your gloss-smeared lips, the way your body shakes with every snap of his hips. “you wanted a nerd? this nerd’s gonna fuckin’ break you.”
he fucks you harder, the mirror rattling, your moans bouncing off the walls, loud enough to wake the neighbors. “so fuckin’ pretty,” he pants, one hand slipping to your clit, rubbing messy, relentless circles. “gonna cum all over my cock, aren’t you? gonna make a mess for me?”
you nod, sobbing, your body trembling, and he slaps your ass, the sting sharp, making you clench around him. “say it, baby. tell me you’re mine.”
“i’m yours,” you gasp, voice breaking, tears streaming, and he cums with a raw groan, spilling inside you, hot and thick, his hips stuttering as he rides it out.
he doesn’t pull out, doesn’t stop, his cock still hard, still twitching as he fucks his cum deeper, the slick sound obscene. “not done,” he mutters, his glasses fogged, his voice wrecked. “gonna make you cum again.”
he keeps going, relentless, his thrusts slower but deeper, each one pushing his cum back inside, making you shake. his fingers on your clit are merciless, circling fast, and you’re oversensitive, your body convulsing, your moans turning to desperate cries. “satoru—fuck—too much—” you sob.
he only slaps your thigh, sharp and stinging, and leans in, his lips grazing your ear. “too much? nah, princess, you can take it. wanna feel you squirt for me.”
he angles his hips, hitting that spot that makes your vision blur, and you’re gone, your body locking up as you cum, a gush of wet heat soaking his cock, dripping down your thighs, pooling on the floor. he groans, loud and broken, his hips jerking as he cums again, another hot rush filling you, spilling out around him.
“fuck—look at that mess,” he pants, his hand smearing the slick between your legs, rubbing it into your skin. “all for me.”
but he’s not done. he pulls you back to the bed, laying you on your side, one leg hooked over his arm as he slides back in, his cock still hard, slick with your cum and his. “one more,” he begs, his voice cracking, his glasses crooked. “gimme one more, baby. need to feel you again.”
he thrusts slow, deep, his hand slipping between your legs to tease your oversensitive clit, and you’re crying, tears streaming, your body shaking from the intensity. he bites your neck, leaving marks, and whispers, “love it when you cry for me. so fuckin’ loud, just how i like it.”
he shifts, rolling you onto your stomach, keeping you pinned as he fucks you into the mattress, his hand pressing your face into the sheets. “gonna cum all over you,” he growls, his thrusts turning sloppy, desperate. “gonna fill you up till you’re leaking me for days.”
you cum again, a shuddering, broken mess, your sobs muffled against the pillow, your body convulsing as you squirt again, weaker but still enough to soak the sheets. he cums with you, a third time, his groan hoarse, his hips stuttering as he spills inside you, the mess dripping out, pooling under you.
“fuck—baby—” he gasps, his voice wrecked, his body shaking as he collapses against you, his glasses falling off completely, clattering to the floor.
“mine now,” he whispers, hoarse and ruined, his forehead pressed to your back, his breath hot and uneven. “you’re mine now.”
you nod, too spent to speak, your body limp, your reflection in the mirror a blur of tears and gloss and him, the phone still recording every ragged breath, every whispered “fuck” as he pulls you closer, not letting go.
but then silence swells, heavy and slow, filling the room like a fog. the air’s thick with the aftermath—sweat, cum, and the lingering sweetness of your perfume, still clinging to the sheets, to him.
satoru’s hands tremble where they hold you, one slipping down to fumble with his phone, stopping the recording with a clumsy tap, the other pressing flat against your stomach, grounding him, grounding you. your breaths are too loud, ragged and uneven, syncing in the quiet like a metronome.
he leans away slightly, just enough to grab a towel from the edge of your bed, awkward in the afterglow like he just realized he desecrated a temple. his glasses are gone, lost somewhere in the mess of sheets, and his hair’s a disaster, sticking to his forehead, damp with sweat.
“shit,” he mutters, voice barely above a whisper, too quiet for the boy who was growling filth ten minutes ago. “did i—i mean. that wasn’t too much, right?” there’s a crack in his tone, a flicker of panic, like he’s replaying every thrust, every slap, every sobbed moan he pulled from you.
you don’t answer at first, too dazed, too wrung out, your body still humming from the overstimulation, your thighs sticky and trembling.
your silence makes him spiral.
“fuck, i knew it. i pushed too hard. i got carried away—i was recording—fuck—i didn’t even ask—” his words tumble out, frantic, his hand raking through his hair as he sits up, eyes wide, searching your face for any sign of regret.
you turn to face him, slow and sore, your cheek pillowed against your arm, the motion making your body ache in the best way. your eyes are still wet, lashes clumped with tears, lips kiss-bruised and sticky with half-worn gloss, swollen from his teeth. you stare at him—this boy, this dork, with his mussed-up hair and the panicked look of someone who just lived out a lifelong fantasy and now doesn’t know what to do with it.
“i’m okay,” you say, your voice shredded, raw from screaming his name. “jesus, i’m so okay.”
he exhales, a shaky rush of air, like he’s been holding it in for hours. he collapses back against you, burying his face in your neck, his lips brushing the bite mark he left earlier. “fuck, you scared me,” he mumbles, his voice muffled, warm against your skin. then, quieter, almost unhinged: “we just speedran my entire hentai folder.”
you laugh, a weak, breathy sound that bubbles up despite the ache in your ribs. “i know.”
“i didn’t even know i could,” he says, his voice small, like he’s confessing a sin. “i haven’t even done that in vr.”
you snort, the sound catching in your throat. “nerd.”
he groans, but it’s not annoyed—it’s mortified, the kind of sound that comes from knowing he’s exposed himself completely. “i’m never gonna recover from this. i glossed you like a fuckin’ bratz doll. i glossed you.” his hand gestures vaguely at your lips, still shiny and smeared, and you laugh again, the sound softer now, your body too tired for anything more.
you roll over fully, tugging him down into the blankets with you, the pastel sheets tangling around your legs. he follows like a kicked puppy, his head resting on your chest, his breath warm against your skin. you can feel his heart still racing, his body still trembling from the high.
“i just,” you mumble, your voice barely audible, “wanted you to notice me. back during the group project, you never looked at me. just your laptop. even when i wore that stupid short skirt.”
he goes silent, his fingers pausing where they’re tracing lazy circles on your hip. then, in a voice so small it barely carries: “…you wore that for me?”
you nod, your cheek brushing his hair.
he lets out the tiniest, most violated gasp, like you’ve just rewritten his entire reality. “i thought you were just one of those girls who always looked hot. like, default setting.” his voice cracks on the last word, and you can’t help the teasing smile that tugs at your lips.
“no,” you say, your tone playful despite the exhaustion. “i was trying to seduce the dumbass with the mecha desktop background.”
he muffles a sob into your chest, half-laugh, half-groan, his arms tightening around you. “i love mecha…” he says, like it’s the most tragic thing in the world, and you hum, stroking his hair, your fingers catching in the sweaty strands.
“i know.”
a long pause settles over you, the kind that feels like it could stretch forever. the fairy lights twinkle softly, casting shadows across the room, and your perfume lingers, mixing with the musk of sex. his breathing slows, but he doesn’t let go, his body still pressed to yours like he’s afraid you’ll vanish.
then he lifts his head, his eyes serious, stripped of the wild edge they had before. “can i… hold you properly? not like—y’know—breeding press. like, real holding.” his cheeks flush, like he’s embarrassed to admit he wants something soft after all that.
“you already folded me in half like a love letter,” you whisper, but you shift into his arms anyway, letting him pull you close. he wraps around you, tight, needy, his hands trembling like he’s still processing you’re real, not just pixels on a screen. his hold is desperate, like he’s trying to memorize the shape of you, every curve, every soft inch, in case this never happens again.
“don’t make fun of me,” he says, his voice muffled against your shoulder. “i think my crush on you just speedran into obsession.” there’s a rawness to it, a confession that feels too big for the quiet, but it lands soft, like he’s finally letting it out.
“you’re the one who begged for one more while crying into my shoulder,” you tease, your voice barely above a whisper, your fingers tracing the line of his jaw.
“stop,” he groans, burying his face deeper, his arms tightening like he could squeeze the embarrassment out of himself. “i’m gonna die.”
you press a kiss to his forehead, slow and deliberate, your lips lingering on his sweaty skin. “you’re not gonna die,” you say, your tone soft but firm. “you’re gonna eat me out on friday and wear your glasses while you do it.”
he whimpers, a pathetic, needy sound, his hips twitching involuntarily against your thigh. “say less,” he mumbles, his voice wrecked, but there’s a spark in it, like you’ve just lit something in him again. you giggle, wrapping your leg around his waist, pulling him closer, your skin sticking to his in the humid air.
and in the quiet, as you’re both drifting off—sore, sticky, still catching your breath—he says it again. not ruined this time, not even possessive. just low. certain. like he’s already planning his next sin.
“mine.”
you don’t answer. just smile into the pillow, heart pounding. because maybe you are. and maybe you’ll let him prove it again.
especially once he finds out what cosplay you ordered last week.
S. Choso is all darkness and mystery, but to you, he is much more. Though your love is forbidden and many things stand in the way, duty, honor, obedience. You still share the most private of moments with him. However, there’s something about him that just seems a little…off.
cw: sexual content, dark fantasy, gothic themes, kinda established relationship(?), dark themes, slight horror(mostly at the end), forbidden love, blood and gore, biting, consensual blood drinking, pwp, soft dom!reader, submissive!Choso and switch!Choso, sex viewed as a sin, religious themes, religious imagery, period cunnilingus, blood during sex, period sex, so much blood, I am not joking about the blood part, misogyny, brief mentions of sexual harassment, public-ish masturbation, prince vampire!Noaya, HOTD inspired, piv.
a/n: Special shout out to @cowboysareloverboys for helping me come up with the ending while sitting in canes after the jjk movie 🖤 it’s always nice to revisit vampire choso in my own little way. I’ve had this fic in the drafts for a long while and it has been rewritten twice so I hope you guys enjoy my hard work <3 If I missed any tags or you spot any mistakes please let me know!
Wc: 12K
Dividers by animatedglittergraphics-n-more. Banner art by NC9_
You weren’t born into royalty, it was given to you.
How you became a princess was nothing short of a miracle. Everything happened so fast, it was like you blinked and all of a sudden you’re being adorned in the shiniest pearls and the prettiest dresses. Nightwalker, creatures of myth. You hated the fact that they are to blame for your royal upbringing. You were a princess thanks to the creature that slaughtered your parents.
It’s almost fitting that you came into the palace drenched in sweat and blood, your clothes ripped from the attack. At least thats how he found you, sitting on the trail that led to your house. You looked a mess, yet he looked at you like you were the prettiest thing he’s ever seen.
You were terrified when he hauled you up on his war horse, scared he was going to abandon you in town, drop you off at a pleasure house. Instead he marched his black beauty right through town until you saw the spires that disappeared into the fog, the intricate carvings in stone, and the windows that let warm light bleed out of them.
The queen was generous enough to take you in. She respected your family for the war horses they bred. After finding out about the tragic death of your parents, she seemed more than happy to take you in. Especially since she had no heirs.
From then on, for the next seven years, it was history lessons, dressage, attending all sorts of balls, doing charity work for the public, and eventually participating in council meetings. You grew used to being a princess, grew used to the palace life. Though there was always something about the place that made your skin crawl.
You think it’s the pests, the bats that hang from the ceiling. They shuffle around loudly from dusk to dawn. Maybe it’s the older noblemen who haven’t seen a woman your age since the queen was young, their stares burning into your exposed skin as you walked the halls. Or maybe it was the dark corners that no candle could light up.
The crumbling palace sat on the cliffside of a gorge. The large river roaring below it. Often covered by a thick blanket of fog and falling snow, surrounded by trees, the palace was hidden from the town. Only on some days could you see its tall spires. It was old, older than the queen herself, and although the environment was eating at it, cracks in the walls and bricks falling from the ceiling, it was still beautiful. The stone floors were always cold under your feet and the windows were always clean and clear.
Some of the rooms were adorned with paintings of wars, members of the royal family, or the wonderful forests that spread throughout the kingdom. All of the rooms were cozy, not always warm, but your favorite place in the palace was your personal chambers. Decorated to your liking, it fit all of your favorite things. But your chambers wasn’t your favorite thing about the palace.
It was your knight.
Choso was all darkness and mystery. Somehow even in the brightest of rooms he could still find a shadow to hide in. He barely spoke, at least not to the other knights, the queen, or the maids. His quiet and stoic demeanor was off putting for some, the nuns who lived in the palace had their fair share of conspiracies on him. They didn’t understand him, they didn’t know him. Not like you did.
You knew that underneath all that armor was a man like no other. Ivory skin decorated with scars, moles placed delicately on different parts of his body. Soft skin stretched taunt over his muscles, dark brown eyes and even darker brown hair. A tattoo sat across the bridge of his nose, one of many that knights in this kingdom usually get. He received it when he was young after he jumped the ranks during his first war. It was a sign of strength, obedience, and loyalty. A single mole sat underneath his left eye, another just below his bottom lip. His beauty was something to marvel at, you question why he wasn’t born a prince.
You knew Choso unlike the others. You knew his smile, his laugh. How when he would smile too big his sharp canines would show from underneath his top lip. You knew what his skin felt like, what his hands felt like. Often calloused from training. You knew his touch, the way he’s so gentle when he grabs you. You knew what he sounded like when you two were alone, what he smelled of. His scent, like the forest. Cypress, pine, damp soil and moss. And that faint hint of blood that clung to him like a second skin. You loved it, loved him. You love the way he lights up when he sees you, the way he always watches you no matter where you go.
You love the way he fucks you. Those late nights with his head buried between your thighs, drinking you up like you were something holy. What a sin it was, to partake in such an act when you’re unwed. With your knight no less. Surely you’d be punished if someone were to find out.
But theres only so much love you could give him. A forbidden subject with a knight and a princess. Your differences in status is what kept you apart, kept you away. You are a princess who’s supposed to marry a prince in some far away land. He is a knight who’s only duty is to obey and protect. It couldn’t be more forbidden, but that doesn’t stop you from indulging.
Your handmaiden knew about you two, she was the only one who knew. Many of the nobles were clueless as to why he spent so much time inside your room then outside, some assumed it was simply because you asked him to keep you company. After all, princesses do tend to get lonely.
She knew what you two do behind closed doors, the stone walls aren’t completely soundproof. She usually says nothing, just simple remarks here and there, sometimes she will try to get you to recite a prayer or confess a sin. Almost as if she’s waiting for you to admit it, but what is there to admit to someone who already knows?
“The fruit was never an apple,” She had said to you one night. She had pins in her mouth as she fitted a new dress on your figure. You froze, eyeing her as she walked around you. “Tell me, what do you think the fruit was, princess?”
“Temptation,” you spoke slowly, swallowing down the dryness in your throat,”indulgences like greed….gluttony.”
“Could be,” she hummed, tapping her chin,”many think the reason Adam and Eve were punished was because of Eve’s disobedience, but we know that it was Satan who tempted her to eat the fruit.”
“What do you think the fruit was?” You watched her as she stuck another pin into the dress. Then she steps back, looks you up and down, and meets eyes with you again.
“I think he tempted her with lust,” she answered simply,”the strongest and most addicting of the indulgences, wouldn’t you say?”
“I…suppose I would,” you had responded, letting her carefully undress you so she could work on the dress. You slip back into your original garments, staring after her as she folds the pinned dress over her arm. She walks to the door then pauses.
“Duty over desire, princess,” she turned her head to look at you,”remember that.”
Duty over desire, duty over love, duty over it all. You really did hate when she would say that. You serve your kingdom and listen to the queen, that’s what your role was. There really were few things you hated about being a princess, that was one of them. But what you really hated made you more similar to Eve than you think.
You hated obedience.
You were expected to be obedient to the queen, to your future husband, to the rules of the royal court, to the Bible thats spine was bound to your own. To your people. You didn’t come from a place where obedience was valued so highly. Here in the palace, it’s the most important trait you could have. If you disobey the queen, you’re punished, if you disobey the royal court, you’re punished. The noblemen, the nuns. You always thought princesses had more power than what stories made it seem, but it appears you were wrong.
And it’s not that you thirsted for power. What you truly wanted was equality. You viewed everyone as your equal and the Queen hated that. Telling you to stop being so soft with the maids, it’s their job to get told what to do, its their job to be obedient. You would argue that some jobs they do you can do perfectly fine yourself.
Do it yourself. The three words the queen hated to hear out of your mouth. A princess should never have to do anything herself, but a princess should always be obedient, thats the rules of the royal court. It was so confusing, you started to think theres a reason you weren’t born a princess.
Your public image took years to perfect and it took many years after that to convince Choso that he doesn’t have to obey you like he does the queen. But he was so painfully obedient. You know thats what he was raised to be, obedient and loyal. You have argued with him countless times that he doesn’t need to listen to your every command. But over time, you discovered something about him.
He loves being obedient.
In a way that many don’t get to see. What you think the real truth is, he loves to be obedient to you only. He loves to listen to you, loves to be loyal, to do whatever you want him to do. He’s set his boundaries, the few that there are, told you what he likes and doesn’t like. And you never thought a man as composed on the outside as him, would buckle and keen to a simple command from a woman like you.
Misogyny is etched deep into your bones, it’s evident even in the palace. The noblemen like to make comments towards you, boss you around, tell you that you need to listen to them. Just because you’re the princess doesn’t mean anything, after all they’re older than you. Shouldn’t you listen to your elders? They should be allowed to make those comments, allowed to touch you, to speak to you like you’re some common whore.
You see this behavior even with the queen, whose husband was long gone and now she had no one to marry. And yet, with all this power she has over the kingdom, the men still tell her what to do. She doesn’t punish them for their comments towards you, for their actions. You think if one of them really did lay you to bed she would blame you and not the man. Oh, what a generous queen she is, what a generous queen you thought she was.
So naturally, when you asked Choso to lick the juice of a pomegranate off your fingers, you expected him to protest. Instead he kneeled in front of you, ridded himself of his metal gauntlets, grabbed your hand and slowly licked the juice from your fingers. And suddenly, you think you understood why obedience was so highly valued with these people.
What started out as a little joke turned into something else, something so intimate. You tested him that night. Telling him if he wanted to be between your legs then he had to use his words instead of looking at you like a hungry dog. Maybe the only time he ever protests, but soon enough he gives in, voice coming out shaky and whiny.
“Please let me make love to you,” he breathes, hands holding your legs as you sit on the edge of the bed,”I-I promise I’ll be good, I’ll be so good.”
As if the act wasn’t sinful enough, it was around that time of the month where you were bleeding, a thing many people call a woman’s divine punishment. All because Eve ate that sweet, sweet apple. And yet, the blood didn’t stop him from burying his face between your thighs and lapping at your cunt like a man starved.
You thought you saw God, thought you had somehow made your way into heaven. The ecstasy you felt was like nothing before, you’ve never experienced anything quite like this despite the millions of times he’s been between your thighs. There was something new in the way he licked your cunt, something deeper than just lust. His nails left crescent shaped marks on your thighs, his fingers bruising your skin from his rough grip.
It was ironic, how much this looked like worship. How he chanted your name into your sopping pussy like it was a prayer. Like he was begging for you, his savior, to let him into the pearly gates of heaven. And you couldn’t help but give him what he wanted.
Praises fall from your spit-slicked lips, telling him he’s doing good, that he’s such a good boy, to keep going, to get his fill. He pulled two intense orgasms out of you before he even buried his cock inside of you.
Maybe you get the obedience thing now, but theres one thing you won’t ever forget, duty does not come before love.
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.
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You remember the day the queen told you that you were to be wed.
It started out unsurprisingly bleak, the sky was an overcast outside, heavy clouds threatening to drop pounds of snow down onto the already white earth. You were able to drag yourself out of bed before your handmaiden came bursting through the door.
As you made your way to the great hall, your handmaiden kept pace beside you as she read off the list of things you had to do that day. Council after breakfast, dressage, and accompanying the queen as the townspeople, in her words, complain. In your words, ask for favors or share grievances.
Choso was nowhere to be seen that morning, likely out doing his knightly duties. He often visited the town to check in on the crime status, see if anyone is worth throwing in the dungeon. Though he often came back empty handed or smeared with dried blood. Sometimes it takes days for him to return, but you manage.
The queen was seated at the table once you walked in, a plate of food already sitting in front of her. You greeted her with a bow before you took your own seat across from her. A empty plate sat in front of you, which was quickly picked up by the nearest maid so you could point to what you want to eat.
An assortment of fruits, a slice of bread, and chopped pieces of roasted boar. It was enough to keep you full until your next meal. You begun to eat, enjoying your meal in silence until the queen cleared her throat. You glanced up at her mid bite of your bread.
“The council is ecstatic today,” she said, pushing around the food on her plate.
“Really?” You questioned, continuing to eat despite her glare as you spoke with your mouth full,”and what is it that they are so excited about?”
“You, dear,” she hummed, stabbing a piece of roasted boar with her fork, she brings it up to study it. Her eyes narrowed, nose scrunched.
Your relationship with the queen has been a mess since the past few years. You’re not sure when it happened, the shift in your relationship became sudden. She’s not entirely fond of your occassional disobedient behavior, but you could care less. She treats Choso like a dog and acts so disgustingly entitled it makes you sick. She knows how much you like him, so she makes it her goal to torment him just to get a rise out of you.
“What about me has them so excited?” You asked when she didn’t say anything.
“That you are to be wed in a weeks time.”
You remember so clearly how your stomach dropped, how you thought your heart stopped beating and how time itself seemed to pause. When you met eyes with her, she was grinning wickedly, her smile lines creasing. You laid your fork back on the plate before speaking.
“Wed?”
It was all you could get out.
“To the prince of the Zenin kingdom, of course,” she continued, taking a large bite of her roasted boar. You watched her chew agonizingly slow before swallowing. “We’re throwing a festival next week and his family will be attending, or did it slip from your little mind?”
“I did not forget,” you kept your expression content, trying to show her that you weren’t upset, more so knowing. You knew why she was doing this. Anything to torment you and your knight. “I know you were to wed me soon but I didn’t expect it to be this soon.”
“He’s quite handsome,” she ignores your comment, moving on to ramble about the prince, making sure to emphasize that you and him were equal rank. It’s moments like those where you think she knows what goes on behind closed doors, but you think she’s too dense to really know. That is, unless your handmaiden had slipped in a few words but you doubted it.
Your day after that was a blur. You couldn’t focus during the council, couldn’t focus during your dressage lesson. The only thing that pulled you out of your own head was the sobs of the townspeople who desperately needed help. A starving kingdom, and the queen was more worried about drinking wine and antagonizing her only princess. Though that day, there was one particular woman who stood out to you.
She had long, silky black hair, kind eyes, and light brown skin. Her face tinted red as she spoke and her hands tense behind her back, she was holding something you couldn’t see. What interested you is that she was paying tribute, not to the queen, not to you, but to Choso who wasn’t even here to witness it.
“He saved my mother from a nightwalker a fortnight ago,” she said shyly, shifting on her feet,”I was able to scrap together enough coins to buy him—buy him these.”
And from behind her back she pulled flowers. Orchids, your favorite. So red that they looked like rubies. The color represented many things, love being the most famous. They hate cold weather, you assume she must’ve gotten them from a trader in the warmer regions. What a journey that could’ve been. You could see the queen sneering from your peripherals. You couldn’t tell if this pleased her or made her throughly upset.
Even so, you assured the woman that you would get the orchids to him. If the queen would allow it, of course. After the woman left the queen looked at you, a glint in her eye you recognized all too well.
“Saved her mother, hm?” She spoke in a whisper to herself but it was loud enough for you to hear,”or did he meet her in a pleasure house? Who’s to say, she looks old enough to be a whore.”
So maybe she did know how much you loved him. Clearly she knew enough to make comments like those. Regardless, you still picked up the flowers before she could and brought them to your chambers where they would be safe.
And that night, after your bath, you slipped into your nightgown and walked back to your chambers. You didn’t expect Choso to be in there, sitting on your vanity stool and gliding his bare fingers over the delicate, red petals of the orchids that sat on your vanity. When he heard you he immediately stood to attention, like he was raised to do.
“You like them?” You gave him that beckon of your hand that told him to rest,”a woman brought them by today, said you saved her mother from a nightwalker. She wanted to pay a tribute.”
“They remind me of you,” is all he said, his eyes following you as you walked over to your bed. You could feel the weight of his gaze as his chocolate eyes swept over the exposed skin of your shoulders and thighs. His words made your skin burn.
“Do they?” You hummed, ignoring that sting in your chest as your mind wandered to your earlier discussion with the queen.
“They do,” he said as he watched you sit on the edge of your bed. He walks over to you and slowly drops to his knees. You cup his face with one hand, and he melts into your palm like he belonged there.
“Why is that?” You asked.
“Because beauty can thrive in the most unexpected places.”
You laughed at his corniness, he didn’t seem to find it as funny as you did, that was obvious in the slight pout to his bottom lip. You let him share your bed that night. Stripping him of that metal armor so he could feel you skin to skin underneath the warmth of black wool. He traced patterns on your arm, buried his face in your neck.
As the night went on your mind kept racing. He ended up resting his head on your stomach, your night gown lifted up so he could continue to trace patterns on your skin. He stared at the way your skin caved under the soft drag of his fingertips.
“I’m to be wed in a week,” you blurted suddenly, staring forward at yourself in the vanity mirror across your bed. You felt his head lift, his eyes finding yours.
“Are you….excited?” He asked, and he asked it in a way that was full of uncertainty, full of worry. You sighed, prompting him to sit up. The blanket slips from his body as he moved.
“No,” you huffed, staring down at your ringless hands,”of course not. Being wed means we cant do this anymore. I don’t want to lose that yet.”
“You don’t have to,” he assured you, or at least tried to,”I can come with you with to the Zenin kingdom, then we can still be together.”
“Please,” you scoffed,”like the queen would allow that.”
Theres a beat of silence. He stares at your face, you avoid his gaze. He was searching you, almost as if he was waiting for you to say something. When the silence drags on he finally speaks.
“Princess, I swore an oath after I found you on that trail,” he grabbed your hand, and brought it up to his lips,”nothing will make me break that oath. Not the queen, not the prince, and not even God himself.”
You’re starting to think that maybe Eve ate the apple because she was in love. Maybe she was in a similar position as you. Where God is your queen and you, the princess, are Eve. All you could do was stare at him as he kissed the finger where the ring will sit. But you could see through him, he too was just as worried as you were. Even a knight like him knew that duty came first.
Duty over love. God, you hated those three words with a passion.
.
.
.
Eve wasn’t so foolish.
At least thats what you think the morning of the festival. Your back pressed against his bare, toned torso. Head resting back on his shoulder as his tongue explored the blank canvas of your neck. One large hand was placed just below your breasts, holding you with such a strong grip. The other parted your folds as he slid his throbbing cock between them. Even in this position it amazes you how he can hold you with such ease, like you were nothing but a piece of fruit.
His hips move in slow, upward motions, making sure his swollen tip kisses your sensitive clit. You can feel the happy smile on his pouty lips as he sucks at your neck, saliva clinging to you like syrup. Soft whimpers and rambles spill from his lips. You coo at him softly, praises and encouragements to keep going.
You think she’s not a fool for enjoying such an act, for committing such a sin.
It wasn’t adultery yet, not if that ring hasn’t touched your finger. It wasn’t as big of a sin. Premarital, still bad but it still felt so good. You could never get over how he handled you like petals of a delicate flower. How you think his hands leave carvings in your skin that last, carvings to always remind you, he’s yours. No queen, noble, or prince could take that away from you. What a tainted, corrupted body you had. But no one could corrupt it quite like him.
It’s like worship, the way he treats your body. Worship you feel so deeply in your soul, you don’t even need to get on your knees.
And when his ivory cum paints your thighs and stomach, when his moans echo in your ears like a cathedral, you understand Eve even more. You try to swallow down the bad taste in your mouth as you bathe in the after glow, the bad taste of this possibly being your last time with him skin to skin like this.
The festival is supposed to last a week. A week too long. By the time the prince arrives your bathed and dressed, you wear something that covers the bite mark he left on your shoulder when he reached his climax that morning. Then it’s a two hour long carriage ride to the festival grounds deep in the forest.
It reeked of men, sweat, and manure. The kind of smell that made your nose scrunch. The stench was covered by the smoke of roasting meat, boars and rabbits turning over fires. Seven days of this and never ending dancing and music. Seven days of sharing a tent with yourself and sleeping on the cold ground which left you sore and bruised at the end of these festivals. Its been years since you’ve ever done such a thing, your now adult body wasn’t that used it.
Prince Noaya was everything the queen made him out to be, at first at least. Tall, charming in the face, his skin slightly tanned from the warmer environment he lived in. Piercings in only one ear, which you thought was odd. However there was something about his smile that made your stomach churn. He had sharp canines, much like your beloved, but they were longer, sharper, and dangerous. His hair was a shade of blonde you’ve never seen before, almost like an unnatural green. He didn’t kneel to you like any other prince would, didn’t kiss your hand and sweep you off your feet. No, instead he looked you up and down and scoffed, like he had made some sort of decision in his head right then and there. That’s when your expectations shattered.
The rest of that first day was spent with the early festivities. Feasting, drinking, entertainment, and dancing. You sat at that long table for what felt like hours, enduring the comments from both Noaya and the queen. You did realize something about the prince, he didn’t even pay respect to the queen. Not a single bow, not a single ‘your majesty’, just a scrutinizing look and a snort. You know how his kingdom is, the rumors about how they treat their women. As you sit there and think about it, your disgust becomes obvious on your face.
You had six other days of this, six other days of the same, tiring thing. Noaya didn’t charm you like the queen said he would, you found him rather annoying after the first few hours of being around him. He danced poorly and handled you with hidden disgust. He didn’t see you as his bride, you recognized that after your third dance. You were nothing important to him, merely an object to use to get what he wants. Not that you really cared, because you knew you were important to somebody. Choso, who stood by the table where the queen sat, his helm concealing his face. Even then, you could still feel the weight of his gaze as you moved throughout the crowd. He’s always staring at you, even when you think he isn’t.
You spent that night in your tent, unable to keep your mind from wandering. Choso was standing outside, keeping watch like the loyal knight he is. You’d try to sneak him in but nobles were still bustling about outside and the other knights guarding the other tents would surely see. Although they never say anything when they see, but you always play it safe just in case. Even so, your mind still ventured, still explored the what if’s. And soon enough you found your fingers slipping underneath your silk nightgown and caressing your aching clit.
You thought about the earlier morning, the dull glow of snowy light on his skin. The sounds he made, the little pleas, the begging. Your other hand squeezes your breasts like he would, thumbs at your nipples like he would. Soft murmurs of his name spill out of your mouth as you chase your orgasm. And even if he’s not with you, you still tell him how good he’s doing.
Because you know he can hear you. He can hear you over the other voices outside, over the crackling fire. You see him shift on his feet in the shadow of the fire, see him turn his head to the side just to hear you better. The next morning you smile at him as you exit your tent, and he, whose face you couldn’t see, smiles back. You’re prepared for the second day of the festival, just one more day closer to the end. You’re prepared for mingling with the crowd, for dancing with the men, and for the drunkards who stumble into you on their way to their tents.
You aren’t prepared for the berating that comes from the prince’s filthy mouth.
You try to make it seem like you’re interested, to make it appear that way in front of the queen, in front of your neighboring kingdom. But you can’t help the disgusted look that finds your face when Noaya constantly tells you to walk behind him when you two are headed somewhere. He tells you that you dance like an injured horse attempting dressage, that your dress is unflattering on you, that your hair looks a mess.
“You look nothing like a princess,” he states. Truly his audacity blows you away.
And that night, while your dancing in front of the fire just for the queen’s pleasure. He turns you around, your back exposed to him. You feel his eyes before you feel his touch. His thumb wipes off the makeup that you used to try and cover the mark. His fingertips graze over the indentions of Choso’s teeth and you flinch away like he was made of fire.
“Something to hide?” He grabs you by the arm before you can slip away.
“A nightwalker,” you try to lie,”its a scar from when I was young.”
“A scar? That’s swollen like that?” He grins, flashing you all of his perfect, pearly white teeth. “Or is the perfect princess committing a sin?”
.
.
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Day three comes. The queen had announced a hunt to take place. The best of the men would seek out a stag, his antlers as tall as the great fir trees. It was a contest that would take the rest of the festival. There was a reward that came with it, however the queen kept it a secret to try and encourage the men more. Noaya and a few of his men prepared for the hunt as many of the other men did too. Your job was to wish them luck, give them your blessing, and then stay back while they hunt.
But, being yourself, you refused in secret.
You left on a mare, tucking a dagger under your dress as you rode into the forest. You know they’d come searching for you, if the queen even noticed. You’d come back before the others did, make up an excuse that you went out for a ride and got lost. Though with Choso riding next to you, you doubt they’d believe that. He knew these forests like the back of his hand, all the knights did.
So you spend the third night in the wilderness with him.
And then the fourth.
And then the fifth.
Time seems to fly when you’re with him. He makes things bearable, fun, and warm. Though his skin is as cold as ice, and you could never hear his beating heart when he lay beside you, he still brought a kind of warmth no one could give you. As you two ride a little further into the trees, you notice how tired he looks. His hands shaking as they clutch the reins, the bags under his eyes are more obvious. He moved with a lethargic pace as the day went on.
When you two finally set up a small campfire, night has fallen. Choso tends to the fire while you chew languidly on some jerky that you snatched from the feasting table. His hair is tied back in a low ponytail, strands fall in his face as he pokes the fire with a stick. The warm light illuminates his features better, you could see just how tired he looks. You hold out a piece of jerky to him, he looks up.
“No thank you, princess,” he hums, brown eyes falling back to the fire.
“You look terrible,” you state softly, bringing the jerky back. You rip off a bite sized piece and pop it into your mouth. “I haven’t seen you eat anything since the festival started.”
“I’ve eaten,” he assures you, but you don’t believe him.
“Then at least get some rest, I can stay up tonight,” you offer with a subtle tilt to your head.
“I appreciate your concern but I think it’s best if you don’t,” he stands from the fire, moving to make sure the horses are tied tight to the post. You stare at the back of his head for a moment.
You find yourself grabbing a handful of snow, manipulating it into a ball in your hands. You strike him in the back of his head almost perfectly. His shoulders jump and slowly he turns his head to look at you. You look away quickly, pretending like you didn’t do anything. Something cold hits you only seconds later, the snow exploding all over your face. You whip your head to look at him.
“You struck me first,” he says with a simple shrug of his shoulders, but you could see the smirk on his lips.
“You just struck a princess,” you gasp with exaggeration, your hand flying to your heart as if you were offended,”that is a punishable crime, sir.”
“Yes but that princess struck me first,” he repeats, walking over to you slowly, teeth flashing as he smiles more. Now he doesn’t look so tired.
“Doesn’t matter,” you turn away from him dramatically,”the royal law states any attack on the princess is punishable by death. I’ll have to have you executed as soon as we get back to the palace.”
He chuckles, a sound only you get to hear. He kneels down beside you, unclipping his metal gauntlet before dusting the snow off that was still stuck to your face. “The queen would be pleased.”
“Oh stop,” you roll your eyes at him with a laugh,”she’d probably applaud me for coming to my senses.”
He looks at you so fondly that you almost forget whats happening in two days. All you wanted to focus on in this moment was him, not Noaya, not the wedding, not the queen, not anything. Just him. A rustle in the bushes drags your attention away from each other. He doesn’t waste a second to draw his sword, standing to his feet and positioning himself in front of you.
You stare from behind his legs, eyeing the bushes as they move. A baby boar suddenly bursts through the bushes, snorting dazedly. You blink at the animal, Choso lowers his sword to the ground. The piglet snorts again, looking between you and your knight. You grin a little at the sight, scooting forward to get a closer look—
Your back suddenly hits the ground with a loud thump, the weight of a snarling animal settles on top of you. You yelp, hands flying up to protect your neck. Your hands find the maw of a large boar, his mouth snapping at you as if it was trying to bite your head clean off.
Choso is quick to react, driving his sword through the older boars throat. Blood splatters onto your face and neck, you clamp your eyes shut to avoid getting the liquid in your eyes. When the boar stills, he pulls the sword out of its throat. More blood pours from the wound before the beast is shoved off of you.
“Princess!” his arms quickly wrap around you, lifting you up so he could make sure you were alright,”are you okay?”
“I-I’m fine,” you gasp out, trying to catch your breath. You bring your hand up to feel your heart pounding through your ribcage, trying to calm yourself. The piglet was gone, you assumed it had run off squealing in the chaos.
You pull your hand away from your chest, staring down at your now stained skin. Blood soaked into the fabric of your dress, making it cling stickily to your collarbones. You could feel the warmth of it, stuck to you like honey. The taste like iron, you spit whatever got in your mouth.
“We should head back, yeah?” He offers, pulling you up to your feet.
.
.
.
It’s snowing when you arrive back at the festival grounds. Many of the men had either made it back last night or earlier this morning, the tracks still fresh on the trails. Just as you arrived people were starting to pack up, as this was the last day until the wedding.
You marched your horse through the festival, covered in dried blood, looking like such a mess. Improper, disobedient. The once calm and shy princess now bled with so much confidence it made everyone turn and stare. You dismounted your horse, Choso followed after you in motion. He grabs the reins of both horses and leads them to the posts off to the side.
You walk through the middle of the festival, keeping your head high and your posture perfect, just like a princess should. Sitting at the large table a few feet in front of you was the queen, next to her was Noaya, and next to him was what you assumed to be his equerry. All three of them looked at you with such disgusted expressions, but Noaya’s held more curiosity. His face was fitted in a glare, though you could tell his lips were just barely trying to curl up into a grin.
“Your majesty,” you bow your head at the queen before walking past the table to slip inside your tent. The look on her face brought you much joy, the feeling of it warming your chest.
The ride in the carriage back to the palace was mostly silence. Your handmaiden was desperately trying to rub off some of the dried blood with a cloth from her pocket, however she was only smearing the blood on your face more. You kept thick eye contact with the queen who sat in front of you, her delicate hands placed folded on her lap. She looked furious and it almost made you smile.
“Do you wish to humiliate me, girl?” She asks sharply, her brows creasing in the middle.
“No, your majesty,” you respond with a little nod of your head.
“You look like a whore,” she spat, her face now changing into an angered expression,”I saved your life. You should thank me for the life I gave you instead of parading yourself around like this covered in blood. Instead of running off with your knight for days to avoid your duty.”
“I wanted to join the hunting party,” you hum, unblinking at her,”do you wish I don’t involve myself in the festivities? This is my wedding after all.”
“I know you didn’t kill that boar,” she snarls, narrowing her eyes at you,”so your excuse is shit. Hunting is not a womanly thing to do. You are a princess, not a man.”
Your carriage arrives at the palace before you could say more.
Your handmaiden runs you a bath as soon as you get inside, she scrubs the blood off your skin, the dirt caked under your nails. She makes sure your in the bath for hours, desperate to get the stench of outside off you. You had another dance tonight, one more feast, and then it would be all over in the morning. You’ll be wed by the end of tomorrow, and more than likely, you won’t see this palace again for a few years. You won’t see him again.
You swallow down the dryness in your throat as your handmaiden fits you into a dress, making sure it’s snug in all the right places. It’s uncomfortable, but most dresses are. Perhaps they’ll have finer material in the Zenin kingdom. Wishful thinking, maybe. She places your fragrance on your neck and behind your ears, your wrists then your bare shoulders.
“Hopefully this will fix your mistake from earlier,” she huffs, stepping back to observe you,”what were you thinking, girl?”
“I was thinking I don’t want to be forced into an arranged marriage with a egotistical man,” you could be honest with her, you liked that about your relationship,”thats what I was thinking.”
“Duty over love, princess,” she reminds you, leading you off the platform and towards the doors. You really do hate those words.
The ballroom is already exploding with music, bodies pressed upon bodies, voices muffled by food, and the smell of sweat and perfume. It was just like every other night this week. Upon arriving you realized Noaya was no where to be seen, you were curious if he was still getting ready. Regardless, you took the opportunity to finally dance without him, hooking arms with some younger noblemen who danced much better than him. The queen seemed to be drinking more every time you looked up at the table she was perched at.
You really messed her up, and you were proud of it. She only ever drinks like this when she’s upset or just incredibly peeved at something and needed a distraction. You can’t help but smile faintly. Maybe tonight, you’ll decide to let yourself have some fun for once.
.
.
.
The moon is high in the sky, shining through the large ballroom windows. It’s late, yet the party grows feverishly hyper. You’ve danced until your feet ached and your head throbbed, so at last you decided to call it quits. You search the doors for Choso, hoping that he would be up there to escort you back to your chambers like he always does, but to your disappointment, he’s not.
There is no way he’s out right now, this event was far too important for him to be leaving for any reason. As your sworn protector, during events like these he is always supposed to keep his eye on you. You remember with a slight pang of worry how he looked last night. Maybe he really was sick and went to get something from the nuns to hold him off until this festival ended. You try not to ponder on it as you make your way out the doors.
It’s eerily silent the further you get into the palace, perhaps because you were used to the constant noise this week, or maybe your fears from your younger days here were coming back. Or maybe it was the small amount of alcohol you consumed, you never really handled it well anyways. You lift your dress as you walk up the rounded steps towards the hall where your chambers sat.
It really is quiet, not like how it normally is. You listen closely as you walk past many doors, some of them belonging to nobles, others just random rooms. You pass by your handmaidens room that sat across from your own, the large open stairwell is what kept you two apart. You slow your steps, face scrunching into confusion. You could’ve sworn her door was open just a crack. You continue to walk until you reach your room. You look back across the stairs to her door.
To your surprise it was opened just a crack, and you could hear something moving inside, or…maybe it was breathing. The quiet sound carries through the empty hallway, echoing off the stone walls. You blink, immediately walking back over there to make sure everything was okay. The air coming out from the crack in the door was thick, warm and heavy with something you couldn’t quite place. Slowly, you push the door open and peek your head in.
“Are you alright?” You say before your eyes land on the messy sheets, the candles that seemed to be thrown on the floor, the scrunched up carpet and the fallen paintings. You search the room in fear until you spot the body on the floor. Your handmaiden lay with her limbs sprawled out, her eyes blank, mouth open in what seemed to be protest or a scream. You push into the room, walking up her body and kneeling.
Her throat was torn open, blood pooled around her head and shoulders. It stained her blouse, her long skirt. It was all too familiar of a sight, the images of your mauled parents flash into your mind. You choke on air, standing up and stepping back as you stare at her ruined body. Your eyes search around the room for the killer, the monster.
“Princess?”
A voice rings through your ears. You look behind you, expecting him to be at the door. When you don't see him you look towards the side of the room, your sight obscured by a thick fireplace. A breeze flows into the room, assumably from the open balcony doors. The sound from earlier has paused, now you could hear what seemed to be quiet, wet breaths. With a shaky step, you walk towards the fireplace, peeking around the stone wall.
That’s when you see him.
Choso is on the floor by the open balcony doors. His shirt is torn, blood stains his pale skin. His hair is down, sticking to his damp neck and back. He looks at you with wide, glassy eyes, lips parted as he takes shallow breaths, there's blood smeared around his mouth, dripping down his chin and his neck. Your hand instantly comes up to cover your mouth in shock.
The ragged breathing you heard a few moments ago wasn’t from him, but from the man underneath him. Noaya. Who lays there soaked with blood, visible lacerations torn through his once perfect suit. His throat was open, not sliced with a sword it looked like it had been ripped by teeth. He was still alive, somehow, his chest rising and falling with shallow breaths, his eyes blank.
“Princess,” Choso repeats, pushing himself off Noaya and stumbling towards you. You step back to avoid getting any blood on you.
“A-Are you hurt?” You ask, looking between his blood soaked mouth and Noaya’s open throat.
“No,” he breathes, falling to his knees in front of you like his legs couldn’t hold his weight,”but I need—I need…..”
“Okay,” you say slowly, looking around nervously,”okay, okay—hold on just—come, come here.”
You grab his forearm, he allows himself to be pulled up by you. You guide him out of the room, shutting the door behind you so no one would peek in. You lead him to your room, your hand sliding on his blood covered arm. It’s warm and sticky, and it would make you gag if you were queasy.
Once inside you shut the doors. You immediately turn to him, watching him pull his sodden shirt off. His torso is covered, so much blood leaked through the thin fabric of his linen. You grab his arm to study his skin. You move around him in a circle, feeling his skin for any wounds you couldn't see.
“We need to get you help,” you state, stopping in front of him. Your eyes scan his body. There's not a single mark on him that you can feel or see.
And no bite. Good.
“Princess,” he says, his tone weary. His brows are furrowed with concern as he stares down at you, but his pupils are dilated. So large they almost take up all the chocolate color of his irises.
“Come on,” you rush, grabbing his arm again to tug on him. You’re almost dragged down when he falls, his knees hitting the cold floor, his shoulders haunched over. You turn around, confusion written all over your face as you hold his wrist. His shoulders rise and fall with heavy breaths, you can hear the slight quiver to his breathing, almost like he was about to cry.
"I can't go, princess," he forces out, his voice is raw and shaky,"I-I can't."
“What?” you stare down at him,"Choso, what happened in there thats making you act like this?"
“N-Noaya,” he breathes,”he disappeared in the palace after we got back——I-I knew what he was but I couldn’t—I didn't—“
“What are you talking about?” you furrow your brows.
“I’m sorry about your handmaiden, princess,” he rushes, tone dripping with guilt,”I’m so sorry——it was either you or someone else, I couldn’t let it be you, I couldn’t.”
“Choso,” you raise your voice slightly,”you’re talking to fast—“
“By the time I got there he had already——had already killed her,” he shakes his head, keeping it down so he didn’t have to look at you,”I’m so sorry, princess, I’m so sorry.”
“Choso!” You step forward and shake his arm gently,”what are you talking about? What did Noaya do?”
“He’s a nightwalker,” he breathes out,”he’s a nightwalker and—and there’s something else.”
The imagine of Noaya's sharp canines flash into your head. You squint as the realization washes over you. You knew something was weird about him and the rest of his men. To think, he had planned on killing you. It’s starting to make sense now.
“I knew it,” you mutter, eyes widening,”I knew something was off about him—“
“The nightwalker who killed your parents,” he cuts you off suddenly,”h-he was a Zenin and he was starved purposely and sent here to—to kill the queen.”
“But because he was so hungry he was blinded and sought out the first thing he could…which was you,” you watch him tense as he recounts the day he found you,”and I’m afraid….I'm afraid what’s to become of me if I don’t—”
You raise a brow at him, waiting for him to go on. When he doesn’t you shake his arm again to encourage him.
“If you don’t what?” You ask, tilting your head.
“If I don’t eat something right now,” he gasps, body tensing as if it pained him to say it.
Your heart drops, realization washes over your warm body. You drop his arm and step back, blinking down at him once you grasp what he’s saying.
“What?”
“I was gonna tell you eventually, princess,” he rushes, still avoiding your eyes,”but I couldn’t, I-I didn’t want you to be scared of me—“
“You’ve been lying to me,” you step back further from him,”you’ve been lying to me this whole time?”
“I’m sorry,” he says,”I couldn’t tell you because I was scared, princess. You—you have to understand—“
A million things run through your head, a million questions, a million answers. The pieces of the puzzle finally started to connect. It explains so much. His fucked up sleeping schedule, how you rarely see him eat full meals, how you can never hear is heart beat, how he always feels so cold.
His abnormally sharp canines you only see when he smiles.
You stare down at him, watching his body shake with quiet, raspy breaths. You notice little puddles of clear liquid below him. He’s drooling. And for some reason the sight makes that familiar heat blossom in your chest and stomach, your fear adding onto it. You look between him and the door, chewing on your inner cheeks as you think.
Somebody will come looking for the prince and you’ll be one of the first they ask, probably. But what could you do? What could you say? You didn’t want Choso to be executed even after he just exposed himself to you. If they saw him like this they were sure to blame him.
“Is Noaya still alive?” You ask.
“Y-Yes,” he doesn’t look up at you,”he’s still alive just….slowly regenerating.”
“But his throat, it was—it was open.”
“I’m so hungry,” he says it in a way that makes your body tense,”I thought maybe his blood would hold me off but it didn’t. I needed something human so I—I—”
He cuts himself off, clearly unable to get the words out. “It’s okay,” you breathe after a few beats, you kneel in front of him,”it’s fine.”
You reach up to cup his face, making him look at you. He looks absolutely ruined, a mess of guilt and embarrassment and fear. Even after he lied to you all these years, your heart aches for him. But him being a nightwalker doesn’t change anything, it doesn’t change how you view him, how you feel about him.
They really are the reason you became royalty, you think.
You eye your vanity where you placed your dagger after you got back from the festival. It sat on the smooth wood, the metal handle flashing in the candle light. You swallow dryly, letting him drop his head before walking over to your vanity. You grab the dagger, and pull the blade out of its sheath.
You stare at the metal, turning the blade in the light. You’ve never used it before, it was given to you as a means to protect yourself. Not by the queen of course, she believed a princess shouldn’t carry a weapon. You pad back over to him.
He looks up upon hearing you approach him, glossy eyes finding you standing with the dagger in your hand. You look down at the blade before turning your wrist over and placing the cool metal against your wrist.
“W-Wait,” his eyes widen, and he reaches out hesitantly,”what are you—“
You drag the blade of the dagger over your wrist, slicing the skin and flesh deep enough that a steady flow of blood bubbles past the wound. You wince, watching as his hand immediately flies to his face, desperate to keep the scent of your blood out. You drop the dagger, walking closer to him with your wrist facing him.
“Drink.”
He stands up quickly, backing up until his ankles hit the bed. You follow him over, grabbing his arm and gently pushing him back onto the mattress with a hand to his shoulder. You haul yourself onto his lap, straddling him gently to keep him in. He doesn’t push you off, he just keeps his hands away. One coming back up to cover his mouth, the other planted behind him on bed. His brows are pinched together in strain, his eyes now lidded.
“I didn’t cut myself just so you could watch me bleed,” your nose scrunches at him, eyes narrowing,”so drink.”
“I can’t,” he forces out, shaking his head,”I can’t—I can’t—“
“Why not?” You question, tone fighting to stay soft.
“Because I won’t be able to stop myself,” he admits, teary eyes looking away from you,”I—I don’t want to hurt you.”
You stare at him for a moment, deep in thought. You bring your wrist up to your lips, eyeing him as you lick and suck at your wound softly. He turns his head to look at you, eyes as wide as the moon. Your lips are smeared with your blood, your mouth full of it, and before he could even react you lean in and press your lips against his harshly.
And god, the way he melts into it. Unable to control himself as he kisses you back almost immediately, a needy moan slips into your mouth. His hand comes up to cradle your face, fixing his posture so he could kiss you better. His mouth opens against yours with a gasp, more of your blood spills onto his taste buds as your tongues meet. You feel all warm and light inside, partly blaming it on the throbbing pain in your wrist and the adrenaline coursing through your body.
He moans again, tongue feeling over yours to try and collect more of your blood. Every fiber in your being is just begging for it, calling for him like a siren’s song. You could feel his length through his trousers, hard and begging for attention already. With a gasp he forces himself to pull off your mouth, lips grazing over yours as he pulls his face back. You chase his lips, giving him a few more soft kisses before you pull back to see his face.
“What? What is it?” You breathe, titling your head at him,”you’re making that face again.”
His lips are smeared red, eyes watery and face flushed. You watch his pink tongue slip out past his lips, licking up your blood that stained them. He looks so pretty like this, so pretty and so perfect.
“Nothing I’m—” he mumbles, looking away and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand,”I’m starving.”
A smile spreads across your face. You lean in, arms coming to rest around his neck, hands dangling behind his head. He grips your waist tightly.
“Cho, if you want more," your lips brush over his,"you'll have to ask for it."
“I want more,” he breathes, eyes searching yours in desperation,”please let me have more—“
“You’re hard as a rock right now,” you point out, shifting your hips on his. He whines, throwing his head back at the feeling. “I shouldn’t give you anything since you’ve been keeping a secret from me this whole time.”
“M’sorry, m’sorry,” he hums, burying his face into your neck,”m’sorry, princess, please, please, please.”
You think he's high off your blood right now, working like some mind numbing aphrodisiac. You've never seen him quite this frantic, this desperate.
“Are you going to be good?” You ask, raising a brow at him.
“Yes,” he murmurs,”anything you want, I’ll be so good.”
“Then no biting,” you reach behind your back, untying the lace of your dress. It loosens, falling down your frame. You ease out of it, lifting your hips and legs until you’re completely nude. “Not until I say so.”
“You’re so—so mean sometimes,” he cranes his neck so he could kiss you, but you pull back with a little smile. You run your hands down his chest that was still slick with blood. You bring your hand up to his mouth, pressing your fingers to his lips. He wraps his lips around two of them, sucking and licking the blood off your skin.
“Yeah,” you smile,”but you like it.”
He stares up at you with the most perfect doe eyes. You lift your hips so you could tug his trousers down, eyes never leaving his even when his cock springs free and hits you in the thigh. You rub your cunt against his tip, tantalizingly slow. He groans, eyes fluttering shut as he feels you. It always amazes you how broken you could get him.
You sink down on him slowly, pressing your wrist to his mouth as you do. He laps at your wound, licking up the blood thats still leaking. His brows knit together, sweat beads at his temple. When your hips meet his he moans, pausing for a moment before going back to lapping up your blood.
He’s deep, so deep you could feel him in your stomach, and he never fails to stretch you out so nicely. You place a hand on his slick, bloody shoulder as you grind, relishing in the way his tip nuzzles your soft spot. He holds your hips with a firm grip, helping you move against him.
“S-So wet,” he mutters, squeezing his glassy eyes shut. He’s been inside you plenty of times and yet he still seems to struggle keeping his composure.
“Fuck,” he looks away, licking the left over blood off his lips,”I’m so lucky, I didn’t know how much—how much longer I could control myself but—“
You wiggle your hips before lifting them, slowly dragging his cock out of you before pushing back down. The movement knocks the air out of his lungs and his blabbering cuts short for a moment.
“Hnnn—you—you let me drink your blood,” his brows kit together even tighter, teeth showing under his lip as he braces himself,”let me—haah—let me—mmm.”
He dips his head down, pressing his face against your chest before kissing at your collarbones, trying to chase them with every bounce of your hips. He drags his lips down to the swell of your breasts, kissing softly before nosing at your nipple. He wraps his lips around the sensitive bud, your breath hitches.
“Choso,” you warn, giving him a pointed look.
“Not biting,” his voice comes out muffled against your breast. You raise a brow at him, making sure to slam your hips down on him a little harder. He gasps at the sting of skin, mouth pulling off of your breast so he could rest his head on your chest.
“Oh—” he groans, drooling a mess all over your skin,”Oh—mmm—feels so good—feels—“
Your legs shake with every lift off his cock. Every time you feel him hit that spot deep inside you you bite back a shattered moan. He grips at your hips so tightly, blunt nails leaving scratches on your skin.
“U-Use me,” he whimpers out,”please—fuh-fuck me, f-fuck me—-haahh.”
“You keep talking like that—“ you huff, feeling that coil already start to form in your stomach,”and I’m gonna—gonna cum a lot sooner—“
“T-That’s okay,” he says, voice raising a pitch,”then I can—-mnn—I can do all the work, yeah?”
He wraps his arms around you, pulling you close until your torso touches his chest. Blood smears all over your skin, rubbing off from him and onto you. He drools as he licks up the valley of your breast. It’s disgusting, so much so you think even Satan would turn a blind eye.
“Mmm you’re doing so well,” you breathe, rolling your hips when they meet his,”doing so well.”
The pressure builds in your stomach, that coil stretches and bends. Warmth begins to blossom throughout your stomach as you start to reach your peak. He moans into your skin, licking at every available spot.
“Fuck,” you force out,”oh fuck—I’m gonna cum—“
“Please,” he whines, squeezing you so tightly,”give it to me—puhlease—please, please—“
You clamp down around him, dropping your hips one more time as you see blinding white. Your orgasm washes over you violently, energy surges through your body. You gasp, gripping onto his hair and pulling him in as you coat his cock with your release. You inhale shakily, squeaking when you’re suddenly lifted off his length.
You mourn the loss for a moment, but it’s mere seconds until your back hits the carpet on your stone floor and your legs are stretched wide by his large hands. You blink in surprise, yelping when he stretches you out again and sets a ruthless pace, giving you no time to come down from your orgasm. The air is knocked out of your lungs with every thrust, your hands fly up to grab onto him. He moans deep, the rawness in his voice giving him a stronger rasp.
“You’re so tight—fuck,” he plants his hands behind your head, fingers curling around your carpet and making it lift,”and so-so wet—haah—thank you, thank you, thank you.”
“Choso,” you gasp out, arms wrapping around the back of his neck,”oh—t-too fast-“
You’ve never seen him like this before, so depraved, so hungry. He’s drooling a mess all over your bloodied chest and torso, eyes shut tightly in concentration.
“I’ve wanted this so--so bad,” he rasps, leaning down so he could lick at your neck,”but—nnn—but I was scared about hurting you and now—-ohh—now I don’t have to be scared I can—-can fuck you how I want—-fuck—“
He's a blabbering mess, his voice breaking on some syllables. He cuts himself off with soft whines and whimpers, hands tensing behind your head.
“I lived so long off of—of your s-sweet pussy, feeding me so well,” he whines, smiling faintly,”I think I was made for this, made to—to pleasure you like this.”
“I’m gonna cum ah-again,” you groan, spine arching off the floor. He hits your soft spot over and over again, you feel like you’re just seeing white and you can barely get a proper sound out anymore.
“Please do,” he gasps,”oh please, please, please—-“
Your second orgasm washes over you, but he still doesn’t let up. His hips drill into you relentlessly you feel like you’re going to split in half. Everything burns and aches. You turn your head away, arms dropping from his neck and laying out above your head.
“I do like it when you’re mean to me,” he goes back to your earlier comment,”b-but I can still fuck you like this and be—be your good boy, right? I can still be good—“
“Yeah—yes,” you babble, gasping at your oversensitivity. You can feel him pulsing inside you, strong throbs that indicate he’s gonna cum soon. "still my-my good boy--mnnh."
“Mmm I wanna cum—-I wanna—wanna cum,” he lifts his head, glossy eyes narrowing at the door,”hhnngg god I'm gonna cum—-I need to bite, can I bite you, hm? Please? Please let me bite you—-“
You nod frantically, keeping your head turned to the side so he had access to your neck. He dips his head down, lips brushing over your skin before his teeth slip past his lips. He doesn’t let up, thrusting into you as he sinks his teeth in, breaking skin.
You nearly scream at the searing pain that shoots through you. You're able to restrain yourself, letting out only a choked up sob and little whimpers. Your fingers curl into your palms, nails digging into the flesh there. His muffled moans sound downright sinful as he fucks you through his orgasm, biting so hard that you almost go numb as another agonizingly pleasureful orgasm washes over you.
He fills you, thrusting in deep as he cums. He laps at the bite mark, drinking up whatever blood spills out of you. His cum is cold, strangely enough. You feel it leak out around the edges of his base, dripping down to your ass. It sends a chill up your spine.
Slowly he lifts his head, hands still planted down by yours. Your blood mixed with his saliva drips from his mouth as he pants, slowly coming down from his intense orgasm. He lets his body rest against yours, keeping his softening cock inside you. Little whimpers and pants escape his mouth as his cock twitches, the after shocks coursing through him. He completely smothers you as he allows himself to relax but you don’t really mind.
He keeps his face buried in your neck as he collects himself, holding your face and tilting it to the side so he could lazily lap at the bite. You try to calm your breath, panting softly. Even this close you still couldn't feel his heartbeat, but now you didn't have to question it. After a moment he mutters something you almost didn’t hear.
“M’sorry,” he huffs, nuzzling your face.
“You’re fine,” you breathe, smiling softly. He lifts his head to look at you, eyes searching your face. Your neck throbs, your wrist throbs, everything throbs and aches. Your legs are shaking almost too dramatically for you're liking.
"I didn't think you had that in you," you chuckle breathlessly,"I should've expected it at some point."
"Was I too rough?" he tilts his head, looking as concerned as ever,"I can be gentle next time---I'm sorry I was just so...so hungry."
"Next time," you mutter, thoughts of tomorrow start to worm their way into your head. You frown as you think about it, looking away from him for a moment. "Cho...I don't know if there'll be a next time."
"I told you I'm coming with you, princess," he responds, moving his head so his face is in your line of sight,"I made an oath."
"I know but..." you trail off, eyes finding his,"Choso, if somebody finds Noaya--if he regenerates he's gonna tell everyone."
You watch face change, eyes shifting up to look towards the door. He's thinking, you can tell by the face he's making. He dips his head down to nuzzle his face into your neck, planting soft kisses before he speaks again.
"Let me handle it," he breathes into your skin,"but promise me you'll wear that dress and walk the aisle tomorrow."
You open your mouth, hesitating to answer. You didnt want to, didnt want to wear that dress, didnt want to walk the aisle. But you had no choice, and this time its him asking you. Not the queen, not the nobles, not even the prince.
"I promise."
.
.
.
Its cold in the great hall this morning.
You stood at the end of the aisle, waiting for your prince to walk through those doors. Noaya, being the oh so humble prince he is, had requested you to walk first because apparently thats how its done in his kingdom. No regard for your kingdoms customs, what a man.
You got ready mostly by yourself this morning, though you had help from some maids. They had asked where your handmaiden was, you simply told them you didn't know. You even checked her room early that morning. Her body had vanished and so had Noaya's, the balcony doors were still open but this time you saw drops of blood leading out onto the stone.
Your dress covered the large bite mark Choso had left on you the night before, but it doesn't conceal the throbbing pain you get from it every now and then. The queen eyes you from where she stands, giving you scrutinizing looks up and down. She's clearly stressed about something, maybe it was the fact that Noaya was taking far too long, or the fact that you didn't look perfect enough. No amount of makeup could hide your exhaustion.
Choso is gone. You have no idea where he went this morning. During weddings, he's supposed to stand off to the side of you. You looked for him briefly this morning, hoping that Noaya didn't somehow wake up and call for his execution in the night. Though you're sure you would have woken up.
You did what he asked you to do. Wore the dress, walked the aisle. And now you were stuck playing the waiting game, your heart pounding and palms sweating as you fear who's going to walk through those doors.
Something outside the large wooden doors stirs, metal hitting the ground, men's voices shouting in protest. You feel your stomach churn, eyes widening a little as you listen. Heads turn towards the doors, the queen looks both worried and upset at the same time. You watch her open her mouth to send the guards out there but she's interrupted.
The commotion outside suddenly stops and it goes silent. You stare at the doors, waiting for them to open, to reveal who was on the other side. You are frozen still, unable to move or peel your eyes away.
The doors creak suddenly, squeaking on the hinges as they are pushed open slowly. Everyone cranes their heads to see who it is, to see who was out there. You can hear your heartbeat in your ears, you grow light headed, almost dizzy as anticipation and worry picks at your skin. The doors ease open, light pours into the doorway from the huge stained glass windows. You're breath hitches when you see him, people gasp and whisper to each other.
Choso stands there, dressed in nothing but a tunic and trousers stained with splatters of blood. His hair is down, swaying softly in the breeze of the opened doors.
And grasped in his left hand was the severed head of Noaya Zenin.
If it wasn't for @/v4mpyrf43 on tiktok this wouldn’t have been finished. Shout out to you girl!! I am reposting this since it was supposed to be scheduled for 12 am lol Thank you to everyone for reading and happy new years <3
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summary. when you, the daughter of a van helsing, a famed vampire huntress are finally given the mission to kill count choso in his castle, you already know it’s fated to end in tragedy. but when you see him, and he’s hot, you can’t explain the attraction you feel toward him. but are his devilish good looks enough for you to forget the otherworldly being he truly is? or will you slay the beast, once and for all?
you’d heard so many stories of vampires, of ivory white fangs gleaming and pale, and centuries-old skin that showed off decades of sunless slumber, of glossy mahogany coffins, and urges to quench an ungodly desire for scarlet-red blood.
in fact, your own father had warned you that the very feat that you had been sent to accomplish, would have sacrifices well beyond human comprehension.
because when dealing with sinful creatures of the undead, this wasn't just a matter of life or death, this was a matter of being damned to eternity as one of them.
"i believe in you, dragostea mea." ("my love" in romanian) your father had said to you scruffily before you left, bending down to give you a chaste kiss on each cheek. "we're counting on you to return home when you have slain the monster, once and for all."
but as you plodded on wearily through the eerily still countryside, you were reminded, not for the first time how you would not be given such a warm welcome if you failed to succeed, with the weight of your father's expectations suffocating your chest.
as a van helsing descendant, you had been thrust into the limelight with the increased panic and sightings of shadows at night, that told of a dark looming figure with a sharp scowl, and sharper fangs.
nosferatu has returned, hushed voices spoke, only becoming increasingly more insistent when bodies began to pile up, left strewn about always with two clean punctures in the soft flesh of the neck, their eyes rolled back and blood puddling below.
and according to town legend and all the stories murmured among the elders, it would only get worse, with the aptly named count choso's ceaseless search for the blood of mortals.
it had already gone on for far too long, with too many casualties, but what finally made your father, the head of the village snap was what had been found yesterday night.
for on the ground, transcribed messily with blood, it read in sloppy romanian, adu-mi-o pe fata vânătoare. ("bring me the hunting girl")
there was no doubt that he was referring to you, having been trained for this moment since birth, to take down the fanged devils that lurked all in the rustic countryside of romania.
you had just never thought you'd be taking the prince of them all head-on.
and yet here you were, armed to the teeth with weaponry all designed with one specific intention in mind. to kill vampires.
yet none of them could quite prepare you to walk straight into the den of one, your eyes sweeping across the foreboding scene stretching before you.
it was twilight, the sky bleak with a deathly silence that lacked even the chirruping of crickets. and just on the horizon, you were able to make out the fortress he was rumored to abide in, a long-abandoned keep with steep cliffs on every side.
it was a rustic victorian-style castle, with stone turrets and cobbled pathways that could use some touch-ups. gothic buttresses lined the triangular, pointed roof, and from your perspective, barbed spikes adorned every surface.
it was every bit as intimidating as you had feared, and it was with no small struggle that you hesitantly trudged further up the rocky path leading to it, a sinking feeling in your stomach.
the crossbow you held tightly to your chest quivered, while you worried your lip between your teeth, wondering how exactly you were going to pull this off.
the only weaknesses you knew of when it came to vampires were wooden stakes straight in the heart, but even that could prove to be no match for the prince of darkness himself.
sunlight, you knew, would also suffice, if you could find a way to lure choso out far enough during the day, but one thing about vampires that the village had taught you was that they’re smart.
and not just the intelligent kind of smart.
no, thousands of years of immortality on this earth had made them clever, and it was going to take more than a couple amateur shots and some sunlight to take the demon down
but before you had time to ponder how exactly, you’re reaching the gated entrance, which you try to push open only for the rusty metal to creak! on its hinges ominously without budging.
you sigh to yourself, looking for another way around.
and it's just then that you notice another dark entrance, this one smaller and off to the side, with the door slightly cracked open as if in wait for someone to enter.
you hesitate for only a moment before pushing your way inside, taking a moment to glance around as you do.
it's eerie, in an ancient way suggesting that no one had been there in a very long time, with bugs scattering out of the way of your footsteps, and dust collecting as far as the eye could see.
what you seemed to be in was a chapel, with rows upon rows of mahogany pews, the high vaulted ceiling a sight to behold with its medieval elegance and grandeur.
thud!
a loud noise startles you, causing you to almost drop your crossbow before you shakily reload it and aim around, searching for signs of life. he must be nearby.
after a few minutes of silence though, you decide to continue onward, your footsteps loud in the dead silence of the castle.
coming further into the heart of the citadel, you find yourself in another old-fashioned, rustic room, lanterns hung on the walls and stone columns rising up overhead.
and judging by the ancient carpet spread for decoration on the stone floor and an old grandfather clock propped against some dusty shelves, its ticking slow yet ominous, someone had been here recently, the gargoyles lining the walls seeming to eye you as you pass.
slam!
you whip around, your eyes scanning desperately as the heavy, wooden iron-reinforced doors swing shut so suddenly it has you reeling.
that was your only way out.
blood roars through your ears as your heartbeat thumps. just where were you?
and it's then that it dawns on you as you turn about nervously, searching for an exit.
for there, laid a slightly ajar coffin, its lid propped open and contents empty save for a deep, ruby red silk lining the inside.
you were in his bedchambers, you finally realize, but it's much too late when you begin to turn on your heel, the sound of the heavy thump thump! of footsteps steadily approaching causing your limbs to stiffen in terror.
you tug uselessly at the door that had closed, but before you can keep searching for another way out, a cold hand is clamping itself around your mouth and another is clutching you by the waist and dragging you to crash into a solid wall of muscle.
"well well, is this the beloved vânătoarea?" ("huntress" in romanian) i've heard so much about you, bunny."
his breath catches softly as choso drags one long finger up your stomach, stopping just below your collarbone.
you squirm desperately in his grasp, but he only tightens his grip on you, a small chuckle reverberating in his throat. "where are you going, pet?"
without warning, he suddenly spins you around to face him, your body pressed into his chest firmly while he lazily eyes you, rosy pink lips curling upward into a faint smirk.
he was tall, looming over you ominously, all ashy pale skin and sunken undereyes, smudged with eyeliner, and fangs jutting out just above his lip.
he was pierced too, shiny glinting metal above his eyebrow and on his lips, angel fangs, you believed was the name.
and as his mouth widens ever so slightly, you notice the same metal gleaming on his tongue too, a barbell that he toys with, running alongside his inner cheek as he watches you in amusement.
your skin prickles as you watch choso lean closer, his smoky incense scent overpowering you, and his warm breath ghosting over the jumping pulse point in your neck, simply breathing you in.
you let out a feverish gasp, as suddenly, his hot wet tongue comes to sweep across your neck, the sensation sending gooseflesh rising on your arms before he simply smiles against your nape, allowing you to feel the sharpness of his fangs as they press against you, not yet biting but just there.
you tremble slightly. “what are you going to do with me?”
now that the element of surprise was lost, you could bet your chances of killing him were zero to none, and you can only hope that your death would be a quick one.
choso huffs softly in amusement against your skin, cold fingers coming to grip tightly around your throat, just enough for your vision to blur. “why, i’m going to turn you into one of us, darling.”
and that’s the only warning he gives before he’s stuffing his face into the warmth of your neck with a downright sinful groan, as if he can’t get enough, lips busying themselves by ravishing your sensitive skin in hickeys.
and the way this was already going, you were sure there was something else to come, something unholy.
as if hearing your thoughts, in an instant, he has you pinned underneath him on the floor, his mouth suckling tenderly on your neck as your fingers tangle in his long black hair and press his mouth down harder while moaning pitifully.
“spread those legs, beloved.” he rasps out, and all you can do is obey, feeling a faint pulsing in your core as wetness begins to pool in your panties pathetically.
and it’s only after he slots one hefty knee between your legs, and then leans his head back, opening his mouth to bare his fangs, sharp ivory cuspids that glint menacingly, that you realize what he’s about to do.
in a heartbeat, he has his fangs sunken into your neck, a prickling pain that quickly turns into something else, something.. pleasurable.
it starts in your neck, an unusual pulsating sensation that quickly sweeps down your body, causing you to urge him closer, pushing his head down into your neck as you let out a pitiful whine.
as choso cradles your head, angling you so he can suck harder, taking long pulls of your coppery taste, you realize you're rocking your hips slowly, almost imperceptibly, against his knee.
he hums in approval, then draws back to lick a long, languid stripe up against the bite marks he had just left, the cool metal of his piercing making you shiver.
"you like that, huh, micuță curvă? ("little slut" in romanian)
“y-yes, i- fuck.” you swallow as your syrupy wet pussy throbs in response, slick already coating your thighs.
"yeah? y'know i can smell your arousal, pretty." he leans back to take in your wrecked state, pushing his knee up ever so slightly and causing you to buck against him with a gasp. "do you want more? want me to make you cum?"
but before you can think of an answer, he's biting into your neck so hard, you're sobbing out a, "y-yes please!"
"i don't think your daddy would like that, would he? a van helsing, creaming pathetically at the hands of a vampyre."
you moan softly, trying to push your hips harder against him in an effort to get yourself off. "p-please, count!"
and then you swear you hear choso whine as your scarlett red blood drips down his chin messily, his tongue lolling out to catch the stray droplets.
all you can do is grind helplessly against him, your sensitive clit bumping the leather of his pants, and throbbing in sync with each gulp of blood he takes from you, as your stomach tightens into small knots.
"taste s'good.." he murmurs hazily, as if saying it to himself. "d-don't wanna ever stop.."
"choso!" you gasp, humping fervently, glistening strings of drool beginning to spill out from the corners of your lips as your eyes roll back.
he sighs in response, applying more pressure with his knee as you feel something hot n' heavy, and downright shameless in its size fervently pressed against you, almost as if it's nothing but a second thought, his first to worship your neck completely like the sacredness of religion.
your breathing turns heavy as you drag your pussy shamelessly back n' forth against his leg while the tingly feeling choso's bloodsucking gives turns stronger, his fangs seeming to lengthen and reach deeper than before.
and when he looks up to meet your gaze, oh, is he a sight to behold.
utterly wrecked, big hazel eyes blown wide and dilated, and full of such sultry need as his mouth sucks relentlessly, starved for any taste of you that he can get.
"în o mie de ani, nu am gustat niciodată sânge ca acesta." ("in a thousand years, I have never tasted blood to the likes of this" in romanian)
"choso..!" by this point, your stomach was so taut and your breathing so ragged that you can only mewl his name like a plea, spasming weakly in his grip. "m'gonna.. hah..!"
and as he hears your weak cries, his sucking turns more intense, scraping his fangs sensually across your skin until finally, with a flourish, you're cumming, whining pitifully as you fall apart against him, soaking your panties with your own gushing slick, and unable to stop your whines of ecstasy.
did you really just..?
"good girl," choso coos, finally pulling back and wiping his mouth with a drunken grin. "now, bend."
but before you can even move however, choso is using his otherworldly abilities to turn you over on all fours, your back arched obscenely as he pushes you forward, pressing himself up behind you.
and once you feel the frantic twitching of his cock up against you, hot and pulsing steadily, you realize he's not going to let it go unnoticed any longer.
“n-need you, sweetheart.” he pants against you, before cool, ringed fingers are coming to curl around your plush thighs, spreading them open wide as he ruts against you desperately, trying to ease the unbearable hardness he was sporting.
you buck back into him, wriggling your hips which he groans at, immediately lifting up your skirts to tear your soaked panties off roughly with a rrrip!
now that your gushing wet pussy was on full display, sensitive nub throbbing as you clench around nothing, choso takes the opportunity to lean his head against you, warm breath ghosting over you teasingly and shaggy black hair brushing your inner thighs.
“all for me?” he says, using one thick finger to swirl your slick around your entrance, but never quite giving the pressure you craved, eliciting a small whine of protest from you.
he tsks at you, unbuckling himself from his leathery confines to allow his length in all its glory to spring out. “patience, bunny. you need this big cock stretching you that badly, hm?”
and oh, was he big, with a curved, veiny girth that was maroon reddish at the thickened tip, absolutely oozing glossy dredges of precum, and adorned with a glint of metal at the frenulum.
he had a dick piercing, too?
but before you have time to admire him further, he shifts impatiently, one large hand wrapping around the swollen base of himself to draaag his weepy length along your sappy pussy lips, precum already streaking down your thighs obscenely.
choso sighs softly, letting his head loll back and rifling a hand through his messy black bangs, as he pushes just the fat, bulbous tip of his cock into your entrance, groaning when you greedily try to suck him in further.
“ready to take it all, pet?” he grunts, easing himself slowly in to your warm, gummy walls at your eagerness, more sticky wetness beginning to seep out of you.
but he's only about two inches in, when you feel yourself stretching and stretching, trying your best to accommodate his utter size.
"t-too big.." you practically sob, your thighs trying to close as your body jerks and your back bows upward into a perfect arch.
but choso is quick to shove your thighs back open, this time even wider, and gifting you a sharp smack! on the ass.
"where you going, hm? don't run from me now." he growls, and then he's pushing in, while his deft fingers stroke your sopping wet clit, circling and teasing you just enough to make you gasp as another inch slides in.
slowly, as he shushes you, cooing soft praises that only make you wetter, he finally manages to bottom out, buried deep into your soft, warm cunt that clenches and dribbles webbed arousal down your thighs.
and then, the only warning you get is his big hands coming to rest on the curve of your waist, before he begins fucking into you like an animal starved, skin smacking against skin filling the air.
the cool barbed metal of his prince albert piercing hits directly into your cushy sweet spot, already making you dumb as your mouth forms into a little ‘o’ and you arch your ass impossibly further.
his fat, bulbous tip is wedged deep inside you, causing little moans to spill out of your mouth as your eyes roll back, and you push yourself against him for more, feeling him slide deeper.
"what would your father think, huh?" choso gasps, one hand roughly wrapping itself around your throat and pressing slightly, causing your breath to leave you in a whimper. "if he could see his little huntress taking a vampire's cock like she was made for it?"
at this point, you can only let out dumb little gurgles, glossy drool pouring lasciviously down the sides of your lips as you feel heat curling low in your belly.
and then choso whines, a hand coming to tangle itself in your hair and pulling, just enough to make your back bend enough to take his ruby-red cockhead deeper into your cervix, the throbbing veins adorning his shaft massaging your insides throughly with each brutal thrust.
“f-fuck, ‘cho!” you moan, your spine curving deliciously as the pressure in your stomach steadily begins to ramp up more n' more 'till you're seconds away from crashing headfirst into your second orgasm of the night, your vision splitting and turning into blurs of white.
and with each rut, his plump, globed tip is bruising your sweet spot, making you curse as his piercing bumps your hot, slithery walls, mapping you out like you're salvation.
“thas’it!” he downright whimpers as he continues rocking into you, keeping you perfectly on the edge, and swiveling his hips back n’ forth.
and only when choso’s fingers come to expertly tweak and roll the poor, sensitive bud of your clit that you find yourself cumming without warning, your thighs trembling before drenching themselves in rivulets of your gushing syrup, clenching hard ‘round choso’s cock like a vice.
and when he makes a noise caught between a moan and a whine, you realize he’s cumming too, length throbbing with every flooding ivory spurt of seed pulsing out in hefty loads until there's so much of it, it's gushing back out.
you and choso lie still in the aftershocks of pleasure, your thighs still twitching with euphoria, but soon enough you find your eyes beginning to shutter closed, and distantly, you feel choso's hands moving you, almost reverently, like you were something special and new, an experiment of sorts.
soon enough, you find yourself sleeping, comfortable enough to make a vampire’s chambers your own bed, a warmness spreading through your body at being marked and claimed for the first─and last─ time.
but not before you hear the soft, hoarse murmur from choso that he says as a statement more than anything else, cool fingers stroking your thighs gently.
“once you turn, pet, you will be my wife for all eternity. i can promise you that.”
SYNOPSIS — Helping the quiet TA, who shrinks himself down to avoid taking too much space, come out of his shell. You’re slowly understanding why he thrives in an environment where he’s told what to do — and he shows you why he’s hesitant to be in charge.
TAGS — MDNI (18 + only) nsfw. work contains explicit sexual themes and content. piv. Gentle Giant!Choso, Dork!choso, overly freaked out!reader. Nerd!choso, SIZE KINK, sub to top(M), Switchy. rough. making out. couch sex. lifting. mutual masturbation. Changing positions. Missiònary. excessive use of sexual innuendos, dacryphilla, inconsistent writing (?). Choso will do anything you ask. PWP. Teasing, Degradation (both). pet names. crack.fluff. reader is nice to him obv. but freaked out.
WC: 14k — art by k4eny on twt
a/n: Hello blog, IM VERY HAPPY W THIS ONE and i promise to not leave u high and dry! this is highly inspired by an augustinthewinter audio (im a #freak) — Also what if I release my drabbles HEH
75%
The score read on your last mock test for your Historiography class. Your worst subject for the semester by far. Next week was going to be your midterm. Now, since your professor, Mr. Gojo, knows his students a little too well, he facilitated a surprise mock text to see how much you all understood the lessons.
A chorus of curses and groans start filling up the classroom with each student receiving their results as they’re handed out.
“…Now I can assure you, if you guys are worried about scoring higher than each other, it won’t matter because theoretically almost all of you failed.”
Another set of groans and a little bit of laughter comes from the class. You’re back to looking down on your paper, flipping through the pages to check every question and each correction out of habit, noting down what you have to improve on. Then you stumble upon the last page with the words;
Feel free to ask for help :) You smile, knowing exactly who wrote this without them being in the room. You look up to double check and you’re right, it was just your prof still going on about Khaldun or something — you tune him out to make way for the giddy feeling rushing through your stomach.
Usually you’d hate for people to offer help when you’re forced to do something you were unprepared for, taking the sentiment as a passive aggressive version of getting called incompetent but this time, you ponder while rereading the sweet little note in green ink— of course he used green ink to avoid students from being discouraged — and it's one of those times your stupidity has done you some good.
It’s an hour and a half later when class ends, people filing up to leave the doors of the lecture hall when a voice calls out to you.
You smile at your professor, a little strained, but it’s okay, you tell yourself, you expected it. You walk up to him, bag on your shoulder, unzipped because you rushed down. You’re still smiling when you’re there, already preparing for what he has to say.
The smile falls and you sigh, “I know that look.”
He’s standing with his arms crossed, dark shades balanced on his straight nose, looking down at you with nothing short of paternal disappointment. “Yes, and you shouldn’t be too familiar with it either. Seventy-five? really? I thought we were talking recommendation letters last week, turns out you’re barely passing my class?”
You swallow back, not really knowing what to do so you kinda just stand there awkwardly, waiting for him to air out his worries. “I know it's like, a little weird to put this much pressure on you but c’mon kid, you’re looking at being the next assistant after Choso to help your resumé right?”
You nod, still not saying anything, but you can’t deny how you perk up when you heard his name.
Your professor pauses briefly mid rant after spotting how you only met his eyes when he mentioned his current TA’s name, a light bulb flickers on in his head.
He squints, “You’ve been familiar with each other, correct?”
“Yes, sir.” You’re quick to reply, stopping yourself from physically gulping out of nervousness.
“He been showing you the ropes bit by bit?” he mutters, uncrossing his arms and leaning over the desk.
“Bit by bit, yes.” You echo, unable to reply without being scared of saying the wrong thing to tick him off.
“And…” He feigned thinking about it, fidgeting with he pen in his hand and tapping the butt end of it on a thick stack of paper. “…He’s also helping with lessons to keep your grades up?”
You say nothing, keeping your mouth flat and shut. You peer up at him, and shake your head slowly, “No sir.”
He tsks, standing up to his full height. “It’s not necessary but you’re aware there’s an average for you to keep up just to become a TA right? We wouldn’t want students biting off more than they could chew.”
You nod once more, though this time, a lot more fervently. “I—yes, sorry. I’ll-“
“Get to it, yeah.” He finished for you, tucking his hands in the pockets of his slacks. He waits for you to move, watching how you’re still standing there and waiting for him to also tell you to move. You’re so alike, he thinks.
He nods upwards, dismissing you. You thank him while you’re already turned your back, eagerly making your way to your next mission.
Gojo watches the door swing inwards from the impact of your departure, a smile in his tone when he mutters to no one, “That’ll give her some motivation.”
You’re rushing to your next class now, given the fifteen minute grace period you were granted had now been shaved down to ten, no thanks to your professor, forcing you to take two steps at a time when making your way to the other side of the building.
You’re looking down at your phone, deleting and retyping a message in your instagram dms. It’s when you pass the stairway that an unexpected force uncontrollably comes on to you. You thud against it, breathe caught, hand tightly clutching at your phone. You stumble on your steps, holding onto the closest thing you feel for. You don’t fall, you don’t even come close to the ground, but your knees certainly felt like they couldn’t carry you.
Because here you stood against a very worried, very tightly holding you, Choso Kamo. Your mind blanks, your class just a few doors away, forgotten. Unintentionally, a small smile spreads on your face.
“Hey, I was—“ He laughs nervously, “I was looking for you.” His hands wrap around your nearly limp arms, almost covering the expanse of it, yet held at a respectable position.
“You okay?” He tilts his head down to meet your eyes, a look of concern etching back on his terribly handsome face, he swallows thickly and you watch his adam’s apple bob decorating his thick neck.
He takes a second to peer back at the stairs, then back to you before he realizes how his grip still clutched on you. “I’m sorry.” He pulls his hands down at his sides, unsure of what to do with them. “I was about to-“
“-Me too actually.” Cutting him off, you couldn’t help but smile even wider, uncaring if you looked too excited. You raised your phone, “Was about to send a dm but I got class in like,” You flip the screen to face you, “two minutes.” A pinch of apprehension makes its way to you but you push it back.
His eyes widen behind his rectangular frames, lenses making them appear bigger than they actually are.
“Really? Shit, “ He cursed, regretful, “I don’t have class anymore so I could just wait out—”
“Sit in with me?” It comes out of you before you could stop it. “—or not.” You quickly add, retreating. “I could just go and email you.”
“No—I mean, Of course. Yes. Me, I’ll go.” He smiled with a toothy grin, ignoring how you said email instead of your socials in hopes you won’t bring up how he stuttered over his words. You’re caught off guard and before you know it, he’s already making his way to the door without even being sure which class it was.
He’s reaching for the handle when you stop him, “Oh, next door, please.” He nods bashfully, adjusting the strap of his comically small backpack on himself and apologizes under his breath. He follows you inside, you push, prying the door open. His palm flat against the wood, effortlessly holding it for you both.
Luckily your professor hadn’t been in class yet, so you weren’t spotted as the only late comer (technically no, with company, you weren’t.) The class was sparsely filled as it was only part of your minor and this schedule wasn’t as popular, so you could basically sit anywhere. You scan over the room, and you spot some seats at the very front. You’re about to take a step forward when you realize you’re being a little rude.
“Where d’ya wanna sit?” You ask, head tilted up with a smile. You try to ignore the gleefulness that comes with the idea you’re gonna be seated next to him. Again, you push this feeling down, knowing it’s completely unprofessional and straight up childish. Though conversely, what you feel for him is not in the slightest, childish.
“Back, definitely.” He answers a little too fast, blinking to check with you. “If you want.” He adds.
He’s so polite, you could just die.
You find comfortable seating by the right side of the class, second to last row and close to the back per request. This classroom was a little smaller, so distance from the whiteboard wasn’t really an issue.
You’re listening to your elderly professor repeat instructions about a future assignment and knowing he’s just going to be posting the guidelines, you just tune him out again, distracted. You have to learn to stop doing that.
But you’re shamelessly peeking at the side, Choso’s writing something down, you watch his face as he continues without a care in the world, back hunched down to get closer to the papers maybe, tongue poking the inside of his cheek in focus. You look down at what he’s writing when he flips the sheet over, the sound of the paper is quiet amongst the loud hum of the air conditioner.
He’s checking something, a test again? You wonder if yours is there. Something catches your eye, he’s even writing down notes in the side for each correction. Maybe he’s also writing notes of encouragement for others. You don’t wanna wanna act all sensitive but something in your chest dampens. A lick of disappointment knowing you weren’t just given a little extra effort.
You shift in your seat, suddenly aware that you completely distracted yourself again and let your overactive imagination take over. You bite your cheek, brushing off the disappointment and sit properly on your seat. It moves the entire table though, you moved a little too roughly. Choso backs up in his chair, the commotion throwing off your professor in his fruitless discussion.
You gasp before immediately turning to check on your hard of hearing professor. He mumbles some incoherent complaint but you don’t wait to think and just apologize, “Sorry,” and it’s hopefully enough to divert the attention from you both.
Choso grunts, “No—sorry, my chair was too loud.” He pulls the long, shared desk back with one pull of his hand, before hunching to go back to work. There’s already a furrow in your brows at the apology, and you’re staring at the side of his face, his hand behind his full, overgrown hair, expression mirroring your own except towards his papers.
You adjust back, only this time you’re a bit farther, scared he’ll probably sense you’re being a little invasive. So you keep your eyes up at the projected screen and let the silence pass, the light sound of the ballpoint scratching paper on the smooth surface of the table and your teacher murmuring mix behind the stupid thoughts interfering and prodding at your composure.
You made this unnecessarily awkward, eyes looking back down on the paper without trying. You’re still kinda curious what he’s writing down. He’s writing down notes to the side, red pen and all— red pen and all?
You do a double take, your uncontrollable, imposing, borderline deluded thoughts returning back to their place in your hopeless brain. Did he use a red pen for everyone or green? He used green earlier, definitely. What the hell? Why does it matter?
“Can I help you?” The inner monologue in your head ceases at the question. You glance up at him, a crooked smile on his face, dimple gracing his features. He waits for you to say something, you process how it's a little close to a tease. You’re unable to say something and end up nodding.
He smiles, achingly sweet and sincere, still waiting for a response. You blank out, unable to think of a proper fake answer in time.
A last flick of your gaze at the paper outs your thoughts, he looks down at them. “If you’re looking for any of your own, this isn’t your section’s.” He assures, trying to fill in the silence you were so talented in bringing out in your conversations.
You giggle out of pure giddiness, unable to hold it in as you act like a school girl and not a college student. It’s probably so strange to him that you’re acting this way — internally reprimanding yourself is your only avenue for self control at these moments. You hope he doesn’t think the same way. “No um, you’re so focused on writing nice notes for everyone and marking every point.“
He smiles wider, eyes turning into pretty crescents. He shakes his head once, sitting back on his chair, and finally not slouching. Your stomach flips noting how he occupies more than half the seat. He scratches his neck, eyes flicking back at the papers for a moment before meeting yours, then averting again.
“I don’t think…” He leaned over to read the name on the paper, “…Inumaki, T. thinks my detailed corrections, or rather critiques are very nice, nor the rest of section Z26.” he mumbled the last part, adjusting the collar of his pull over.
“critiques?” You inquire, unconsciously leaning to his side of the desk, closer so you could read them too. Choso hopes you can’t feel the warmth on his cheeks radiating right now.
He nods his head a little too quickly, despite not being able to see him from where you were. He’s dizzy with the scent of your floral shampoo under his nose, heady and pulling. “Yes, just to help with,” he falters again, your bare arm brushing against his own, clothed one when you point at a certain part of the paper while reading, knees hitting under the table when you’re closely looking down on the sheet. “With the, the uh, future tests yeah-”
Choso watches your lips move but he doesn’t hear what comes out. Right now, he’s pushing away such un-utterable, uncalled for thoughts when his view is your head over what would be is his lap, only being separated by this rickety table. It only gets worse when you shift your eyes at him, wide and up at his tired onyx ones, only now his are a little wider too, something past friendly reflecting in your before averting back down the white sheet.
You’re still reading the paper, taking in the info for each question. “Oh,”
He snaps out of his daze, immediately taking notice of your blank tone. “What’s wrong?”
You’re processing the words on the essay type test he’s checking and you realize you’ve never seen this kind of test before. “Y’know, now that I’m reading this, I don’t think we’ve answered this activity yet.” A beat, and Choso flips the paper down.
“Right, that’s probably not good,“ He places a spread out hand over the papers, sheets mix on top of each other, disheveled and disorganized, one nearly falling off the narrow table.
You’re already laughing, “You’re so clumsy,” your hand stopping one of them from flying out of place.
“No, you probably shouldn’t look at that too-“
“Relax, I don’t have the photographic memory to copy each answer. As much as I wish I did.” You mumble the last part, tucking the papers into an organized pile, facing outwards. “See? No cheating for me.”
Choso fights the smirk that inches his way under the skin of his cheeks, nodding to you. “I appreciate your integrity.” You return the look on his face except with the stack in your grasp right now, it reflects its white canvas like a soft light on your skin, a sweet warmth overcomes him. “I never told you why I was looking for you.”
You place the sheets separate from his pile of unfinished work. Pursing your lips, you make a noise of acknowledgment. “Oh, I was thinking the same thing. I didn’t know how to approach you ‘cause it was kinda embarrassing.”
“Embarrassing how?”
For a while, you contemplate how to make yourself sound less pathetic, trying to amp up how to sound flirtier without breaching whatever boundary of the title you held to him. You wanted to play safe, for now.
“Like to ask for help, I bet it's as funny as someone asking a stupid question since you probably didn’t have to do any of that when you were in my year.” You don’t have to confirm with him whether or not it’s true, Choso’s going straight to a master’s after graduating this year. You’ve been hyping yourself up to ask him out for a while, knowing that he’ll most likely drift from you as a friend with the work that comes with finishing one.
You truly weren’t looking for any kind of college relationship or even a fling, knowing such places bring unnatural levels of attraction to people who lack self identity, and if you’re being honest, college made you question that part of yourself when you first began.
Ergo, you focused on yourself for your first year to second. Now, you’re in your third year’s second semester and people are thinking about their thesis and fellowships. And here you were only starting to make career moves for your future in your third year.
But you digress, circling back to how all that led you to meet Choso. Someone you’ve made acquaintances with last year during an exhibit at the school’s anthropology museum. Yes, you had an anthropology museum — Jjk technical college was not cheap.
His hair was a tad shorter back then, guiding a bunch of first years through the new exhibit, excitedly discussing some bones and energy. The glint in his eyes was bright and he was wholly unfiltered, charmingly gauche. You had tried to pose a question at the time, wanting to entertain him out of definitely just pure curiosity for Bioarcheology, but second guessed yourself and never approached him again.
Until, it was that same year you found out he had been the TA for the professor you were aiming for next year (as a second year college student), and you found out he was resigning as the teacher’s assistant from a friend of a friend, and how Gojo had been already looking for a new one early on because Choso was that competent.
You want to say that maybe you joined just because professor Gojo was someone you highly look up to in the field of history research and will grant you a killer recommendation for a future career — which you know he will— there’s an underlying feeling where you also can’t deny that the idea of how it brings you closer to Choso made the position all the more appealing.
So this year, when Gojo read your CV and decided to accept you out of the many (3 applicants, one was an irregular student, the other a nepo baby), and encouraged Choso to start training you by now, it was like fate realigned itself to bring you closer to him.
Sort of.
Now he was in front of you- beside you, and casually replying with, “ I don’t mind spending my free time with you—tutoring and stuff.” He offers, completely unaware how he gets your stomachs in knots and your heart feels like it's trying to rip out of your ribcage.
“Really?” You ask too eagerly, he nods for extra reassurance. “It’s just, Historiography just isn’t something I’m good at but I’m also I find it interesting but it’s also really hard but— I also want this.” You size him up, towards his side of the table. “Y’know, this.”
He‘s about to point at himself, before looking at the papers and something clicks in place. “Checking papers on top of your thesis, dropping them off at Gojo’s office at 8 am, and getting death stares when I come across his students?”
You nod, almost even more eager, “Absolutely.”
“You’re perfect then.” He says, no hesitation whatsoever. You were eating it up and he was completely unaware. You giggle, heat rushing to your face.
You almost forgot how talking came easy with Choso. It was refreshing to meet someone you could hold a conversation with without feeling like you had to perform all the time, or wonder what to amp up or tone down. He had his intimidating moments at first, like being overqualified for a TA and the unmistakable height, or when you’re overthinking how to impress him and you don’t truly act yourself — but those impressions crumble effortlessly when you recognize him for his sincerity and obsession with the academe.
Choso can’t help but let a chuckle bubble in his throat, smooth and rich like a creamy cup of strong coffee. He’s analyzing your face, the apples of your cheeks are out with how wide you smile, he made you smile like that. The fact sits comfortably in his chest. He’s staring at your lips, maybe he can get away with it as him just looking down to your height, the few times he feels his own acted as an advantage for him.
“…any reason you use green?… Choso?” He blinks, and he’s back in the classroom and you’re now holding your own head with your palm, waiting for him to answer.
The back of his neck is hot with the thought you could probably notice him zoning out. “I like,” he searches your eyes, hesitating, and then, “I like green, so.” He nods, trying to rationalize his plain answer to himself.
You’re squinting, “Cool,” nothing behind your tone, just the air that still manages to sit awkwardly between you two, suddenly the old scribbles in the storage part of the desk was so interesting—
“And it's good for not like…” He swallows back his nerves, heart pounding in his ears. “I didn’t wanna discourage students.”
The admittance runs like oil down your back and you feel like you’ve hit him dead center in what you wanted to hear. “Right,” You look around, a false pretense of thinking in your expression, “So… why the red?” You ask curiously, pen in your hand scratching off the old paint under the desk in anticipation.
He paused like a deer caught in headlights, licking the dryness of his lips. Staring down the sheet of paper, yes it’s red indeed, he thinks. His lips part, you watch the smooth, glossy sheen of it move against the light. “I guess I have a favorite class.” He coughs, feigning the ease he was currently lacking with each word he carefully chose to speak.
Despite the urge to egg him on, you leave it at that, your bravery for the day already expended. You know if you continued you might say something a little irrational, and you’re also afraid to jump his bones too quickly. Though you’re pretty sure he could still hold you up if you tried.
Class ends anti-climactically, your professor waving your class off with a less than interested parting. You’re out of the classroom, Choso following behind when, “So, when do you wanna start? I’m free after class tomorrow and it’s the weekend. I don’t mind staying longer.”
You’re following his pace as you walk through the hallways of your building, aiming for the exit but you’re thinking about what happens after. You’re not fully sure where you’ll end up once you part. Do you just go? He stayed with you the entire boring class, (obviously the only reason why you want to stay longer and none other in particular) surely there must be something you have to do in return.
You’re nearing the exit and you can’t help but feel like you’re letting something slip if you go past the doors without making your thoughts known, “I have this thing with my best friend tomorrow, this is not a very good look for me— I promised I’d do this qualitative interview and—“
He’s quick to reply, “Oh yeah, I totally understand—“
Shit, okay you were not seizing the moment correctly. “You should come with me.” You turn over to him, unable to stop yourself.
Choso all but freezes, “What?”
Okay, no going back now, smacking your lips together before going for the kill. “—With me. Yeah, we could hang out and,” Could you still back out? No.
“Just, maybe study after? like we could study like… for the,” So much for not wanting to jump his bones, “…whole night.” You can’t look at him any longer, eyes scanning back the outside that now surrounds you. The noises of campus and the lamp posts are bright, projecting a warm white over you. But all this is not enough to comfort you from the trepidation finally shaking your brain.
You watch as Choso’s pale cheeks start to tinge into a flushy pink, eyebrows raising behind his glasses.
“Oh, okay, yes. Okay!” He nods taughtly, though willing.
You pause, “Okay?” trying to check if he’s serious.
“Sure.” You’re both standing opposite his body, shocked with what you’re hearing from the other as much as you were shocked from the words leaving yourselves.
A beat passes, leaves rustle, and amidst that you’re silently hoping it won't matter how you didn’t think this through fully. “Five o’clock sound good?”
***
It was a steady, calm-ish afternoon, your best friend Miwa was sat in front of you, laptops laid out on the table. She’s writing down notes and closing up her recording software and you’ve been fixing up your hair, clothes, and picking lint off it. You find a loose thread on your shirt when, “Hey,” You look up, alert. Miwa’s squinting at you, blue hair cast in a warm yellow from the mid-afternoon sun. “You good?”
You’re finger quits picking at yourself, “What? Yeah,” eyes flitting back to the pesky string sticking out of the hem of your top.
There’s a hum coming from in front of you, “You sure? You’ve been so fidgety this entire time.”
“I am not fidgety.” You say, fidgeting. A sigh comes out of you, and you lean back on your chair, hands coming on top of the arm rests. “You really okay with me bringing Choso?”
At this, Miwa’s lips curl into a smirk. “I knew it.”
Your eyes flick over to the side in thought, then back at her sly expression. “What do you know?”
She’s sitting up from her hunched posture over her laptop, and drinking from her cup of her almost lukewarm coffee, shrugging with her eyes still locked on yours.
Your thumbs come up from the arm rests, “What is it?”
She clears her throat, placing the mug on a coaster. She looks back up, a smirk still planted on her face. “Just that I didn’t know that he was your crush,” she expects you to reply, but you’re still waiting for her to elaborate. “Y’know, Choso.”
“I don’t have a crush on him!”
She squints, “Okay so we’re lying today.”
“It’s merely admiration— and some attraction at most.”
“That’s literally what a crush is based on.”
You’re blinking at her, feeling caught. You bite your tongue, knowing that your best friend out of anyone should be able to catch you in a lie. Or even a truth you lie to yourself about. You speak up, “Well?”
“Y’know I love you.” She starts.
“Oh no.” Dread seeps into your stomach, and you know if she starts somewhere along the lines of sugar coating, the following was about to be some bland truth coated around maybe an even bitter core inside.
“I like Choso! He’s been your friend for a while and I’ve never talked to him but he sounds really devoted to his work, maybe goodlooking, he’s smart, and he’s nice—“
“What would Muta think…?”
She chuckles, softening at the thought of her own boyfriend. “No, I just wanted to keep an eye out for you too when I say this.” She pauses, trying to find a way to word this as pleasantly as possible. “Cause you know how girls talk…”
You latch onto that last part, stomach churning in suspense. “Not really, I don’t.”
She stops herself from cackling at your nervous expression, “I just heard he’s always…nice.”
“What’s wrong with that?”
“Like too nice? I guess…it’s really hard to explain babe,“ She cuts herself off, sensing your growing apprehension. She observed how your hands are rubbing on the expanse of your cup, and bringing it to your lips to avoid saying something. She quiets down her tone, now kinda shy about mentioning it. She leans a bit towards you, “Like… in bed, y’know?”
You sputter in your mug, feeling unwelcome liquid scratch your throat. Miwa’s eyes widen when she watches you cough, eyes turning watery. “Ooh gag reflex, that’s not coming in handy.“
“Fucking shut up-“ You’re coughing still and she’s laughing uncontrollably now. “—I did not expect that.”
She’s wiping the corner of her corneas with a finger, “I—I’m sorry I just had to bring it up.”
You’re more composed now, eyes looking up at the clock, it’s ten minutes to five, and you’re trying to relax.
You don’t exchange looks with Miwa until a short moment passes for you to think.
“So have you thought about what it would be like?” You’re back to meeting her eyes, a silent exchange between you both. Miwa smiles at you, lowering her voice and putting a finger up to her ear like an agent, “Then I’m glad to relay information.” She’s giggling when you throw a tissue at her.
You’re already standing out of your seat and making your way to sit beside her. She motions her hand for you to come nearer, both turning your heads when the door chime rings and someone enters, calming down when it’s just some delivery person. You relax, side eyeing her.
Miwa inches closer, “Okay so I’m friends with this senior from my org and she had a friend who was seeing Choso, sort of? Anyways I mentioned once that you were replacing him and that you’re a little into him, sorry.” You’re beckoning her to continue, not caring much for the last part and nodding along.
“Anyways, it was like a one night stand thing and — don’t get me wrong I’m not trying to spread rumors or judge,” Another pause, and you’re already on the edge of your seat.
“Well? Go on,” You pull her in, arms tangled and clutching her, knee jittering.
“I heard he was kinda scared in bed? Like maybe he has a phobia or something.” Your knee stops, and you’re now confused, “It’s just kinda odd ‘cause the guys like a unit, right?” a crease forms between your brows. “Maybe he’s like… a power bottom?” she whispered, tone serious.
You’re nodding, taking in the information with actual consideration. “Possibly,” You’re fully facing her now, “Y’know…he is a TA.”
It’s Miwa’s turn to be confused, struggling to find the correlation. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
You fight the expression trying to pull on your lips, you nibble on the skin then let go, “I’d say he’s good at being told what to do.”
Miwa’s eyes widened, before adding, “Tell me when you find out.” A second where you’re both quiet and then you’re being shook by the shoulders, both of you squealing and chortling in your corner. It would be no surprise if you’ve caught the attention of other customers with your commotion.
She quits with the shaking, now smoothing over the fabric over your shoulders for messing up your top. “So what are you gonna do about it?”
You can’t help but entertain your imagination, “I mean I think I’m too conscious to be playing around too much.” Your friend nods along, supportive. Past these exciting thoughts, it was all a front for the feelings you struggled to word out, “I really like him, Miwa.”
She parts her lips but as if on cue, another chime from the door rings once more. He stood by the entrance for a brief moment, barely scanning the vicinity when he locked eyes on you, a cheeky grin lighting up his face.
***
“—I think they never made any real contact.”
“No, that’s definitely up for debate.”
Miwa watches your back and forth, pen in hand. Choso decided to be part of her research sample as well, given that he’s already here, he should make use of his time. And he didn’t mind, he liked helping out.
If only he could actually speak and answer the questions without you guys debating every time one of you made an opinion on something vaguely related to Miwa’s research topic. At first it was good, your opinions can be added too but now she’s running out of space in her storage with how long this unintentional joint interview was going.
“Okay guys, the interview questions are about historical revisionism. While I do see the correlation, how did we end up in Egypt and…?”
“Ancient Mesopotamia.” Both of you say, completing her sentence.
“I can elaborate.” Choso suggests, clearly unable to read between the lines of Miwa’s inquiry.
She stretches in her seat, her legs feeling cramped up with the lack of movement all this time. “Y’know what, I’ll hold you two to that. But first, let’s take a break!” It’s not even a minute until she’s out of both your and Choso’s sights, on the way to the restroom, pen and recorder left on the table.
“Y’know, I don’t think she likes me that much. I also think she’s too nice to tell me that.” You’re in the middle of cracking your neck until you’re moving your attention to him.
“Don’t worry too much about it, I think she just isn’t up for hearing any more strong opinions on exported textiles.”
“That’s if they were truly exported—“ You shove his arm, and he’s laughing at your face, not even moved from the push. He’s pretending to rubbing his bicep in feigned hurt, lifting his arm in the process, almost flexing. You try to ignore how they felt so hard under your fingertips. You check him out unintentionally, taking notice of how the hem of his layered shirt hangs enough to show the lower part of his stomach. Out of respect, you look the other way.
You swallow thickly, ears hot. “I think I’ll get another snack. Want anything to eat?” You’re already standing up and off the chair, limbs wobbly from the long period of time you spent sitting on the deep arm chair.
There’s a sudden burst of noise coming from the entrance of the café, very loud and boisterous. You can’t help but let your jittery self get distracted, there stood an entire group of men, looking like they just got off practice. You’re wondering why one of them looks vaguely familiar, but there’s a body blocking your view out of nowhere with what you realize is Choso’s chest.
There’s an odd, slightly frantic look in his eyes you haven’t seen on someone as easygoing as him. “Um, how about I go with you?”
You’re looking up at him, a little skeptical on why the sudden change of tone, but agree anyways.
You’re in the short line along the display and point out pastries that you could try when a voice calls out to the person beside you. “Cho!”
It’s easier for you to check where it’s coming from as Choso was in front of said voice. You recognize the pink hair from the group coming in earlier. He’s about 2 inches away from being as tall as Choso, hair damp like he just came from a shower, and a sports bag was strapped across him.
A pat on his shoulder signals your dark haired companion to turn, seeing a sight he’d been trying to avoid earlier. Of course he had to be the one ordering for his group.
“Hey man,” Choso greets, strained, a guard visibly coming up around him.
“What’s up, you don’t say hi to family anymore?” The sentiment, although on paper sounded sweet, in reality was like a taunt. Something you don’t wanna dissect to avoid reading into it too much. “Who’s this?”
You peer over at both of them, their attention now on you. Still unable to read the room, you focus on Choso to see how he wants this to play out. He steps in for you, “You know her, I mentioned the TA thing like a while back. She’s a friend, though she is replacing me.”
He gestures to the pinkette’s side, introducing him.
“My brother by the way. Same year though.”
Sukuna nods at that and smiles, canines showing. He reaches out with his hand, and you meet it halfway. “Ryomen Sukuna.” Huh, he’s not a Kamo.
“Pleasure,” You’re squinting your eyes, there’s something a little unsettling about him that you can’t place, but you’re not trying to jump into that.
“I didn’t know Choso had any siblings — ones on campus, no less.”
You let go of his large, callous hands, moving an inch closer to the cashier when the customer before you has their turn to order. “Have 2 terms to catch up with and I don’t really see this one around either ‘cause I did training camp in Barcelona last semester.”
You nod in acknowledgement. Silently, you’re comparing them, unknowingly looking back and forth between him and Choso a little too obviously.
“We don’t look related do we?”
Before you could defend yourself, a dry chuckle beats you to it. “We get that a lot.” He squeezed where his hand was planted on Choso, who visibly tenses. “Different mom, same dad. He doesn’t take after him though, if you’re worried—“
“Alright, I don’t think she wants to know about that.”
“Speak for yourself,” You laugh nervously, trying to ease the tension you could feel multiplying tenfold. He pats Choso’s shoulder before bringing his hand down to the side, not before looking at the side of his brother's face as he semi-whispered, “At least one of you doesn't have their panties in a twist.”
“I would if I were wearing mine.” A very long, awkward silence overcomes all three of you. That is until a nearly genuine smile breaks out of Sukuna’s angular features.
“Ha, what the fuck,” He mutters in amusement, “You’re both weird, that’s cute.” A dry chuckle eases the anxiousness you were struggling to place the source of. Though at the cost of your own dignity.
The line to the cashier moves, it’s yours and Choso’s turn now. He’s first to leave his brother’s side, not even bidding him a glance as he moves past you. “Nice meeting you,” you voice out, still on edge, Sukuna just nods in acknowledgement.
***
It’s around 6:40pm when Choso walks you to your apartment outside of campus. There’s a slight tension in the air that you’re struggling to bring up, it’s been there for the remainder of your meet up, not having said a word since you’ve left the café. You’ve been trying to make a move and talk to him but he’s had his eyes on the ground this entire time, rarely up, and definitely never on you.
He was about to walk in the pedestrian lane when you tug on his backpack. He’s caught in the pull, looking up to the red walking signal reflecting on the road. He walks back to stand next to you, still not saying a word. “What’re you thinking so hard on?”
For a moment he turned his head to you, a little too quick to not look like he wasn’t anticipating you to bring it up yourself. He looks ahead once more when you’re walking now. “I’m sorry about earlier.”
You start to feel a little guilty for not clarifying sooner, wondering if this entire time he thought he should’ve apologized for something he couldn’t control.
“It’s alright, it wasn’t unpleasant for me.”
He almost laughs at that, “Right, and I was jumping for joy.”
The air shifts, it’s not so tense anymore, just between that and uncertainty directed at something else entirely. “I felt really dumb earlier.” He adds, looking back down on the pavement. “I couldn’t say anything to make him leave us alone.”
You’re a few blocks nearby to your place, walking a little ahead of him so he could follow you now.
“Again, it wasn’t that bad. You don’t have to apologize.” Once more, silence fills the space between you both and it feels like you’re unable to remove this weight you feel affecting your interaction.
Now you’re both looking at your feet as you wait for cars to pass the street you’re crossing and for the timer to finally get to zero. Your foot is stepping over a dry leaf to fill in the lack of communication, the sound crunching in the quiet in a loud, distant manner.
“I just kinda get made fun of for acting like this—weak.” You crane your neck up to meet his eyes, and you’re right to think he’s still looking down. “It’s just annoying how even until now it’s expected of me to bite back on others ‘cause I look like I should.”
There’s a furrow in his brows, and he’s tightly clutching on the strap of his bag. “Like I’ve accepted that, sort of. I’m already conscious of it— but maybe people like to pick on me when it's obvious I’m not gonna do anything.”
You’re making another turn together, he’s leading with the path he’s familiar with and you follow, his words don’t falter. “Maybe ‘cause it makes them feel less small or some shit — I don’t know.”
After processing the words that left him, it brought you back to your conversation with Miwa. How you laughed about his past history with women and how you basically gossiped about his insecurities. Guilt swirls in your stomach, realizing this might just be a little worse than you treated it to be. You keep quiet, deep in your own thoughts, letting him say what he needs to.
“And of course my own brother is like that too.” He rants, tracing back to the behavior he displayed earlier. “He’s my brother and I love him, yes. But frat guys could be such dicks, y’know? I was like his first practice hazing dummy lite…in a way.”
You nod, acknowledging him. “Right, right.” You’re turning to the street ahead of yours, just about a block away now.
“It’s hard to not let those insecurities take over.” He groans, “I spent so much of my life trying to make my best first impressions, and I feel like it backfires on me with the wrong people—I hate that.” He’s scratching the back of his head. “Sometimes I just wish I looked normal. That way I wouldn’t literally feel like the elephant in the room.”
At that, you turn almost as if you’d heard the worst take in your life, brows scrunching. “Normal?”
He shakes his head, “Yes, normal. Like I can wear normal shoes and sit on couches normally.”
“I like that you’re not.” You say, insensitively. “I mean you’re not not normal. But I like…it.” You slow down, trying to backtrack on what you just let slip.
He’s blinking down on you, a look of surprise etched on his slowly flushing face. “…Why?”
Your breath is caught in your throat, not knowing how else to explain it. No going back. Remember?
“I feel safe, even if you don’t…bite back. And on top of that you’re kind. I think that matters a lot.”
Choso stares at you like you just grew a tree on your head, but in truth, he’s just trying to tone down his elation. “Really?” He asks dumbly, already cursing himself in his head for looking like he wants to hear you call him that again. Safe.
You dip your head, agreeing once more. “I’m a girl so I may be a little biased but if I were also a little taller, I wouldn’t have to deal with some idiot guys trying something on me, and I could also defend myself easier.”
“Oh yeah—Yes, that's totally different from my problems.” He clarified, trying to catch himself from sounding ungrateful. You watch the way his expressions shifts from blank to stressed and bite back a smile. “There’s obviously people with worse problems than being bigger than a doorway.” He’s looking down and pushing his glasses up, almost ashamed.
You turn to the road leading up to your street, your apartment just at the end of it. “Is that like 6’3 or…”
“Huh?” He meets your inquisitive eyes, “Uh, just a little more.” He replied, shying away from your stare. You’re thinking about all the objects that could possibly match up to Choso’s figure.
“Those chillers they got in 7’11?”
“Hm, nope. Like 2 inches more, maybe.”
Your stomach does a flip you had to ignore, “You’re lying. Six foot six?”
“Without shoes, yes.” He nodded, met with you side-eyeing him. “Well you’re free to go with me to my annual checkups and see.” He defends, a smile finally appearing on his face at your skepticism.
You squint, stopping yourself from looking too excited with the many, unbecoming thoughts storming your brain. “I’ll hold onto that.”
Shortly after, you find yourself standing in front of the building to your apartment. “I’m sorry about dumping all that on you, It was a lot.” He looks around before letting out a barely there sigh, “I’ll get going now—“
“Are you forgetting?” You look back and Choso’s standing stiffly, feet planted on the ground. “We’re…studying, remember?”
Choso’s throat bobs at your sly tone, convincing himself there is nothing behind it. “You did a lot today I just thought we were tired—“
“We don’t have to study then.” You’re looking around and thinking to yourself before landing back on his face, “I mean you came all the way here, you could come up and have some tea?”
The notion has his chest puffing out to regulate the way his heart started beating like its pounding from behind his sternum. He doesn’t say anything, his eyebrows raise behind his glasses, his usually sleepy eyes now wide. He nodded and let out a strained, “Okay.”
***
The door to your apartment swings open with a loud creak. The lights switch on, a warm white cascades from the ceilings.
Your keys make a clinking noise against the ceramic jewelry tray you leave on the dresser by the entrance. The door is wide open, you feel Choso trailing behind a couple steps away.
He’s standing kinda stiffly, “Do I take my shoes off or—“
You’re shaking your head, stepping aside to let him in. “My neighbors are kinda sticklers for people who leave their shoes outside in the halls.” He walks past the doorway, head craned down. It’s supposed to look like he was trying to avoid getting hit by the frame of it, though he’s only finding a way to hide his face naturally.
He picked his head up when he heard clanking from the kitchen which meant that you were inside. “I hope you’re not allergic to pollen? I like to put honey in mine.” You ask, your voice still clear as the space isn’t big at all, but in his head it’s distant. He’s trying to calm himself down, taking in your apartment.
It’s small, kitchen tight and you’ve no space for a table. You use the counter as one, your bed, desk, and sofa all in the same space. However, the lack of furniture made it wide, the “living room” taking the least space with just a little coffee table and the tv on the floor as the only decor.
“You didn’t say anything so I didn’t add any honey.” He finds himself turning on his feet when he’s met by your figure, coming from the kitchen with two— red and yellow —mugs. You hand him the yellow one, he takes it with a ‘thanks’. You make a move to sit on the couch, trying to get cozy. Choso’s still standing, sipping on his cup awkwardly.
“You can sit if you want.” Choso’s eyes flick over to you. You realize he had shed his bag on the entrance, still it looks like something is weighing on him.
“I’m okay, I might launch you out of it—“
“Sit with me.” You pat the spot beside you on the couch, your fawn-like eyes up at him.
It turns his legs into jelly. Thoroughly convinced, he sits beside you, trying to be as careful as he can so the side of the couch doesn’t sink to his weight too much.
He winced at the audible sound of the springs under the cushions, “Sorry.”
Quietly, you assess him. How stiffly he sat, how much of the seat he took up despite keeping himself at the edge of it. If he sat back, would his knee brush against yours? Though you feel a little bad for taking advantage of his reactiveness towards you. However, something deep inside you is undeniably excited with the thought.
On the other hand, Choso feels like he’s watching himself act in third person, deliberating what part of his body he should move next to not look too obnoxious or stiff. He doesn’t know if he should just let the silence pass till he runs out of tea, or maybe till it turns lukewarm. You shift in your seat, he feels your gaze heavy on him. You don’t say anything, you just stare at the side of his face. His throat bobs.
He looks over to you for a split second and meets your eyes, you raise your brows at him, a smirk growing on your sweet face.
An anxious laugh bubbles from his throat, the tips of his ears tinging red. “I think you’re aware of how you’re making me nervous.”
You couldn’t stop the way the smirk spreads into a wide smile. “I was thinking of how to get you to talk, is all.” You tilt your head to the side, checking out how the light from your room lamp makes his jaw seem sharper. His hair nearly fell on his shoulders, built and perched with his elbows on his knees, posture a little hunched, but he still sat taller than you. Nothing short of tempting in your eyes.
He follows your gaze, “What?”
“You’re also thinking of something.”
His brows pinch, he hates how good you are at prodding at him when he clearly doesn’t know what to say. “I’m always thinking.”
You nod, “And still, you haven’t said anything since we went up.”
Choso pauses his already stiff self. You place your mug down, crossing your legs on the couch. He brings his attention back to you but you’re already intently looking at him. He flinches back.
Sighing, “What do you think I’m thinking about?” You purse your lips, shrugging at his question. He shakes his head, a smile fighting its way on his face.
“Then I’m happy you only brought me here to drink some tea.” A roll of his eyes comes out of sarcasm, reaching for his own mug on the table, stretching his arm out.
He’s about to pull his hand back when your smaller one lands on top of his. The contact would have made him drop the glass into little pieces if it weren’t for the coffee table underneath. He lets down the cup, missing the coaster you laid out.
“That’s my mug….” You point at the red cup in his grasp, yours. You let the words linger like the pads of your fingers on the back of his hand, “Hm, you’re really warm.”
He blinks, unable to ground himself back to reality because maybe, maybe you’re trying to make a move on him. He’s unable to look into your eyes,
“Uh,” He falters, the warmth on his cheeks multiply and spread out when you inch closer, the warmth of your own body makes him feel like he’s overheating.
“How else could I get you to go up with me?” You say, goading another reaction out of him.
“I-I mean you could just ask and…I wouldn’t say no,“ You’re closer to his face now—too close. But you’re still not looking at eye level — not close enough.
“I think I’ve done a lot just to be around you, Cho.” He almost melts at how the stupid nickname his brother calls him sounded so good coming from your honeyed lips. Choso gulps, audible and embarrassing in the silence of your apartment.
He started off this conversation on the edge of the couch, somehow it feels like you’ve backed him into it.
“Y’know, the TA stuff, asking to study—do we look like we’re studying now?” Your arm skates over his hand, up his arm, the touch leaving goosebumps in their wake.
You watch how his jaw all but clenches at the feeling, a newfound confidence makes you unbelievably giddy, driving you to push more. “But I wanna know for me,”
He feels like he’s running out of breath before he could utter a word when your palm lands up on his hard chest, feeling for the erratic thumping of his heartbeat underneath the fabric of his shirt.
Your head is craned up, lashes bat at him, “What are you willing to do?”
He’s looking deeply into your eyes, searching for the answer to your question, not realizing how his neck is craning down at your height in return. Several beats pass — he feels a tug on his shirt and then he’s closing the distance between your lips.
He whines on the soft, wet skin, sucking gently, eyes falling shut. His hand finds your cheek, the other reaching for your side when you tangle your arms around his neck. The pace is hungry yet fervent, tugging and melting against the other. You pull away slowly, lips parting from each other wetly. You’re smacking your own lips before smiling up at Choso, giggling.
His eyes are hazy, glasses crooked out of place. His hands are covering your back and smoothing over your clothes, “I can do anything— whatever you want.”
If you weren’t already grinning wide enough, now you’re fully Cheshire-like. Pushing yourself closer towards him, “Anything?” He nods eagerly, you’re pulling him in, hungry.
His hand is on the back of your neck now, holding. There’s something about his touch that feels like it’s keeping you together without feeling too possessive. Caring with a dash of hesitance. One you’re looking to break through tonight.
Your lips travel down his neck, leaving hot, lingering kisses along his throat. “Oh, mmh-“ He bites his lip immediately after nearly letting out the low noise from chest, eyes shutting when you find the particularly sensitive spot on his neck. You feel his fingers dig rougher on your hips, you’re on your knees now, determined to cover every inch of him in your touch. Your weight falls on him when he tugs you, the hands planted on his shoulders squeeze out of instinct.
“You good? I-I didn’t mean to, ah—“ He tried to move his head away from your persistent lips, but a shiver that runs through him stops his actions. You’re sucking on his skin, humming proudly, undettered from your little slip. His hands brush down your sides, they plant themselves lower on your waist.
You plant kisses all the way back to his chin then meet his lips again. You’re eye level, a sinister glint in your eyes. You stick your tongue out, half lidded gaze and staring right at him — brushing the wet, pink muscle along Choso’s bottom lip, teasing. Heat rushes on his face, blood rushes on his crotch. You’re killing him.
You suck on the pink flesh, tugging then letting go, he’s pulling you in closer by the back of your neck. He wants you on him, mind unable to decide how — just everywhere is fine. You drop your palm down between your bodies and on the garter of Choso’s sweats, feeling for the hardness underneath.
He hissed as your fingers brushed what would be his shaft, “Um, sorry, can we make out a little I think…” He holds your head closer to his face, breaths mingling as you catch them. “I’ll get less hard— nervous, I think. Sorry,” You hummed in agreement before landing back on the flushed skin of his mouth, quieting him down with your lips.
You giggle against him, chasing as he squirms, palms settling on his shoulders. You pull off him with a peck, feet planting back on the carpeted floors. Choso now sat far into the couch, slacked with legs spread. His mouth parts as you start undressing, stripping off into your underwear.
He sizes you up and down, taking in your soft, bare skin, your strapless bra and cotton panties under the warm lights of your apartment. It elicits a heavy throb under his pants. Choso’s breathing feels uneven and the air grows thinner when you settle back on the couch, only now between his spread out legs.
You’re steadying yourself, his hands find a place on your warm, now bare skin. You smooth over the wide expanse of his chest, then land on his neck, even warmer than you. “This okay?” You ask, to which he only replies with a nod.
You’re about to lean into him when he reaches for his glasses, but you stop him before he tries to pry the piece of metal off. “They stay on.”
His breath catches in his throat, stomach dipping. A part of him he’s not quite sure whether he wanted to acknowledge, liked when you tell him what to do.
He lets his hand fall, you adjust the rims on the bridge of his nose. “You’re so pretty.” You’re holding his face with both hands, tilting it upwards to you. A lopsided grin appears on his face at the comment, eyes shying away and down from your face and to the body on him.
“Thanks- Thank you,” He replied poorly. His palm skated from your waist and to your back, laying above the clip of your bra. His lips are caught between his teeth as he takes in the feel of your skin against him, he looks up. “You’re awfully pretty as well.”
He was never good at expressing himself,only with what he was sure of. But this was new, you pushing, him taking, it was all new. But he meant every word he said to you. He leaned in to catch your lips against his. Fuck, if only you could tell how much he meant it.
He’s slotting his tongue in between your parted mouth, leaning further in and you’re falling back, but he’s catching you — keeping you to him. You work together smoothly, as smooth as silks rubbing against each other. You clutch on to him tightly as if he’ll slip if you don’t. You taste like jasmine tea and he’s wondering if the sweet taste is from the honey or just you. He’s holding you by the neck and pushing your back into him.
You finally move to settle on his lap, the kiss unwavering so you’re first to pull away, “Choso—“ He catches the sound of his name in your mouth, chasing, taking, and taking. There isn’t any place on your body that isn’t covered by him, your arms, your back, your legs in between his that caged you. You moan at the thought against his greedy tongue, entirely consumed. But you’re impatient and already wet, the fabric of your panties has been riding up for the last 10 minutes. So you squeeze his arms weakly, but it’s enough for him to let air flow between you.
“Shit, Sorry—” He’s frantic and searching your eyes, but he’s met with your hazed out ones and your swollen, drooly lips. He wiped the corner of it, chest heaving. “I need to— you’re driving me insane,” He chuckles, deep and uncertain with how true the fact felt. He’s brushing your hair back gently, “I’m sorry,” he lets go of you as you’re pulling away.
You’re upright now, letting your feet back down. You’re bending over to his lap, palms resting on his spread out limbs, “You need to make it up to me,” You’re once again reaching for his sweats, the imprint of his shaft taking form at the side. He gently lays his hand on your wrist.
“Are you sure?” His eyes are wide, pupils dilated, the frames of his glasses are now on the tip of his nose bridge. But there’s a wave of genuine uncertainty blanketing his expression.
You’re blinking up at him, “Why wouldn’t I be?”
It’s a tangled knot in his chest, one bundled in embarrassing moments and unsuccessful hook-ups. He stuttered over his words,
“Just that before I’ve-“ he pondered if he should risk you laughing at him, but you’re expectantly looking into his eyes, and your hands are already on his lap, a little more and you’d be right where he’s aching for you. “I’m scared of making it…unpleasant?”
His hand rubs up and down your arms, you’re tuning him out and thinking of how you should go about sitting on him. He continued to ramble on, “Um, like I’ve been told it was…“
“Too big?” You ask, attention now on him. Externally you’re collected, stating it like a remark. But internally you know it’s a fact. You feel a little bad thinking about it but now you’re piecing together your earlier conversation on what Miwa’s friend’s friend might’ve been complaining about.
Choso all but nods, eyes scanning your room as if that would keep yours away from him. “I could just help you, y’know. We don’t have to—“
You’re turning over and maneuvering his hand out of his lap, sitting on his thigh. For a moment, you’re a little hesitant, hovering. “I mean I’d like it if we did, but I’m also…” His words trail off, holding your hip and securing you on his lap, unbothered as your weight settles on one thigh. He clears his throat, “I’m okay with, um, anything.”
You’re leaning into him, on your side, hand trailing underneath the hem of his shirt, grazing his clenched abdomen. He jolts, causing you to jump in your seat. Your eyes widen for a moment before relaxing, hand skating lower under the garter of his sweats with a simpering grin on your face. You’re kissing his cheek, gentle and slow as your hand palms over his hard, covered cock.
He’s watching your move under the fabric of his gray sweats, feeling your smaller fingers squeezing and rubbing the base of it. It hurts, he thinks. In a way that something stings and feels good at the same time. You’re squeezing at his tip when he throws his head back on the couch, groaning loudly. You take the opportunity to mouth on his neck again.
“Can you please— Can I please take it off?” He asks politely, but the grip on your hip feels anything but. You hum, still licking at the expanse of his neck.
You’re pulling his pants down with his help—mostly him just taking it off himself, desperate and aching. He’s bare from the waist down now when you settle back on his thigh, sweats and boxers discarded on the floor.
You’re now shamelessly gawking at his erection bouncing against stomach, slapping against it. The warmth of your hand catches him off guard, finally making contact skin to skin. You tug on the shaft, immediately taking notice of how your fingers struggle to close around it and were squeezing on accident.
“F—oh, god. ” He rests his head on your shoulder, sweat building on his forehead. You start moving your hand up and down, already slippery from how he’d been oozing in his boxers the entire time. He’s quiet behind you, save for the heavy breathing on your skin. You go faster. “Your hand’s so tight,” it comes out in a whimper. A wet, mouthing sensation can be felt on your shoulder, he’s biting your skin to muffle himself. But It doesn’t work, his throat lets loose with each reaction.
His eyes roll up from your shoulder when he feels you lean forwards and away from his chest, cock twitching when a wet glob of spit drips on him from your tongue.
You’re both watching your hand work up and down, bringing both onto the shaft, he’s cursing as you go faster.
You’re throwing your other leg over his thigh, straddling him in reverse, before resting back on him. Choso's hands come up to hold you under your knees, keeping your legs apart. He watched as the movement stretched the fabric, pussy still clad in underwear, drenched and barely covering it. But he can’t help but peek lower, your hands exclusively paying attention to his erection.
You joke, “It’s like I'm jerking myself off.”
A deep chuckle rumbles from his chest, the vibrations thrum against your back and you turn them into moans as you suddenly go faster. “Sucks though, I can’t feel it.”
You’re unable to see his expression behind you, but you can hear how his moans are muffled between his teeth, “You’re s-so eager.”
You reveled at how shaky he’d sounded. “One of us has to be.”
And then a strange noise akin to the tearing of fibers can be heard from below. You gasp as it happens in front of you, hands slowing its ministrations. You realize you’re watching him rip your underwear, exposing your wet, shiny pussy. “Hey—“
He’s adjusting himself from under you, bringing his other hand under your thigh, your legs tugged higher as he starts rubbing right on your clit.
He’s rough and accurate on where he wants to touch you, deliberate in his movements. He’s quick but he isn’t rushing either, his only motive was to get you to falter in his stead as you were doing just the same.
Your voice shrinks into breathy pants, the slick sound from your poor clit syncing in with each, “Ah, ah, Cho—“
“You’re making me so, so hard, baby—” You’re both an obscene sight to behold, playing with each other, spread out, grunting or whimpering. Both sloppily still trying to let your lips tangle with each other despite the inconvenient position. Both a mess, your tits spilling out of your bra, and his glasses all fogged up.
You grind into him, “Feels so good,” rubbing your juices on the cock you’re jerking with now one hand, coating his chubby length. Your body felt like it was on overdrive, moving your hips up and down as you clenched on nothing, gushing freely.
You’re biting your lip as your hips grow erratic, brows pinching and your abdomen clenches on itself. “I-I’m close.”
Choso lets a groan escape,“Fuck, really?” realizing he’s making you come first. It’s a miracle he’s held off this long, he wonders if he’ll hold up if you let him inside. The thought makes him move your hips on his cock, assisting you as you use him to get yourself off.
He doesn’t know if he’s breathing so hard because he’s getting tired or because he knows getting your clit rubbed nudges you a little closer to the edge when you start to get louder. He breathes against your ear, “Come on me, please.” He’s mumbling now, less at you and more to himself. “I wanna see you cum on me, please, please—”
Your legs begin to shake in his hold, fighting to shut close but the grip under your knees forces you to come with your legs spread wide, pussy making a show of spasming against Choso’s cock, voice breaking as you whimper. “That’s it baby, that’s it,”
Choso is completely enamored, the sounds of your high pitched whines in the air was like music to him, the way you writhe against his body was this entrapping dance. He couldn’t keep his eyes off you.
He notes how you were still in your bra, he whispers something about it, but you’re just nodding your head with your eyes shut, riding it out. Then he’s unclipping the strap with one hand, the fabric falling off and releasing your perfect tits.
You then relax your back to him, twitching still. But then he’s thrusting his erect cock up between your folds, the stimulation starting to make you wetter again, your breath can only catch up so fast. You’re attempting to lift your hips with a squirm.”Gi-give me a sec—”
Choso quickly lets your legs fall to the side and pauses, sitting up and moving your head to face him. “Shit- we can stop here,” he assured, breathy and worried. “I didn’t mean to, I was just looking at you. You looked-” So fucked out, “I’m sorry.“
“Sh-shut up,” You look away and Choso stiffens under you. Was he too rough? Before he could even utter another apology, you spoke, “I’m fine, I just need to— breathe.“
He watches you quiet down from underneath you, he’s rubbing your thighs comfortingly. “I am sorry,” The silence lingers, only getting tenser with each beat that passes.
And then you start chuckling — at nothing in particular. Your breathing slows down, and you look back to check on him. He looked so worried, brows pinched and his lip jutted out. A lazy smile breaks into your features, leaning down to catch him in a chaste kiss so he wouldn't see the expression on your face. “I liked it, okay?”
His breath hitched in his throat when you spoke against his lips, “Yeah?”
You’re nodding, smile now exposed. You kiss him again, powerless against his sweet lips. He relaxes, hand coming up to the back of your head. “I wanna-“ A kiss, “Fuck you now,” A slower kiss, “Please.”
He’s backing up to read your face, reassessing. Within the silence, something passes between you two. Amidst the air that smells of sex and vaguely of tea, there’s this mix of warmth and uncertainty—and whether or not to dive in it — that lingers in between.
He’s nervous under your gaze, once again, looking for a way out of your eyes that traps him so effectively like no other. He’s looking down at his still, very much, erect self. “I don’t have a condom.”
You’re thinking to yourself before you reach for the side table of your couch, scrambling for a box you kept there in case.
Choso’s scrambling to rip the plastic off before fishing for one packet. “I’m not really sure if it would fit so, maybe just try it,” You remark as you’re being maneuvered out of his lap and on the side of the couch. He fumbled with the rubber a couple times, pulling it down before it snapped a little too tightly on his girth. He tugs it down on him until a tear starts spreading on the side of the translucent material.
“I’m sor—“ He hissed as it snapped against his skin, “See I can’t even fucking…I don’t think this is quite right—” He’s cursing to himself, obviously a little sexually frustrated. For someone his size he still managed to look somewhat like a defeated puppy.
You’re tugging the broken thing off, relief blooming in his chest but it’s short lived as he’s reminded of how he might not even have sex with you anymore. “But no, we really don’t have to.” He says, discouraged.
“You can fuck me raw, I’m on the pill.” He internally groaned, pulled back out of his head. You just had a way with your words.
He does a complete 180, eyes widening, shifting from beaten to optimistic. He reminds himself to curb his excitement though, slowing down. “You can be on top—set the pace?” You’re already moving to sit on his lap.
He’s nodding his head at you, and finally rips his shirt off himself, now completely naked. You’re staring down at him, licking your lips at the sight of his milky skin and toned chest. He pulls you out of your thoughts, voice small and distant.
“I’ll pull out, yeah?” He’s swallowed back thickly, more of reminding himself to do that. “Just be slow okay? I didn’t prepare you that wel—um,"
His voice trails off when you’re already lining yourself up with his reddened tip. “A little at a time—Oh,” You’re already sinking down, unrepressed.
The stretch is long and constant, to the point it feels like you’re rethinking how fast you jumped on this, except you remember you’re already lowering yourself very carefully.
Your jaw hangs open in a silent scream when you get past the head, sinking lower, your walls throb against his member. You’re bracing yourself with a palm, Choso’s chest is covered in sweat and heaving. “You’re so—‘s really tight, oh fuck you’re so warm,” He whined out, unable to complete a sentence.
He’s leaving a trail of hot, open mouthed kisses on your neck and then back on your lips to keep your mewls at bay. You’re kissing back, he’s only half way in when you start moving. Choso’s breaths turn ragged against yours, pulling you closer to him. You catch your breath, “It’s stretching me out so much, Choo-” You whine, slowly rolling your hips.
He’s squeezing your waist before trailing his hands down your ass, “You’re doing good, you’re doing really good.”
He’s looking down at your progress, struggling to tell where you ended and he begun, now nearer to the base of his cock. He throbs inside you. “Fuck, a-are you okay?” He’s looking back up at your face, taking in your lips, bitten and swollen under your teeth.
He lets out a shaky whimper, “You’re taking so much.” His eyes finding their way back to your hole swallowing him. “So good, baby.”
You tuck your feet over his thighs for leverage, pulling off his cock slowly then sinking back down, and back up. You repeat the motions, torturously slow, your slick creating this lewd noise from each rock of your hips as you go deeper. Choso’s hands are on your thighs, weighing you down but he’s really holding back from actively pushing — still you’re sinking, taking more.
You start to bounce, struggling to hold yourself up with your palm on his chest, the slight sting of the stretch dulling out to a deep pressure. It’s a lot easier now, you go even faster with the help of your growing arousal slicking up his cock. Every touch you leave on each other now feels highly sensitive, your tits pressed against Choso’s hard chest, his hands squeezing on your ass for dear life. You’re left unable to keep up conversations or teases to each other now, heads completely in a different space. You're left babbling incoherencies as your tingling nerves derail your focus, the only thing clear was to go after what felt good.
But you falter, your knees slowing as they start to ache but you push yourself further, desperate, taking even more of Choso’s length. You find yourself losing balance and lean over, panting. You lift your hips, then let your ass fall back into his lap, a strained mewl leaving your throat, “I-I need help. I need you, Cho—need you t’a fuck my pussy,”
He groans out at how high your voice got, fresh from its suppressed whines. “Okay I’ll help,” He’s quick with his hands, holding you by the globes of your ass, and pulls you up. He bites back a noise, hearing and feeling your tight pussy gush and clamp on him as he lifts until it’s just the tip. “s’ okay if I thrust a little?” He whispers against your ear, growing desperate as his cock pulses in anticipation. You nod fervently in his neck, arms circled around him. “Okay baby, I’m gonna. I’m gonna help this pussy- fuckkk”
It’s noisier now, from your skin, sticky and slapping against each other, to your gasps turning into moans against each other’s open mouths. Choso’s now taking all the work, lifting your ass and bringing it down to meet his aching cock even faster than you could have. He starts meeting your pussy half way, thrusting up wards and it knocks the wind out of you.
Moans spill out of you with each thrust up, breaking and then bursting out of you. You’re clinging to him, bodies impossibly close, skin rubbed up against skin. “You’re so fucking loud, honey—do you like it?” His groans turn into grunts with how he’s physically exerting his body, on a mission to see you break apart on top of him.
You reply with a noise of acknowledgment, barely audible amongst the slapping and heavy breathing. You’re body feels hot all over, from inside and out. He’s deep enough inside you in places you didn’t even know was possible to go that far in, and the best worst part is you haven’t even reached the base of him yet. A new objective makes itself known in the part of your brain that still functioned, a dimly flickering idea.
“Ch-choso can you, ngh—“ You’re bringing your face out of his neck to face him, but he’s still busying himself with his thrusts, “I want you deeper, c-could you do that f’me?”
He’s letting out a high pitched whine he when lets you down, about to throw his head back when you catch his lips in yours, tugging on his hair and pulling roughly. “You’re stronger than me Cho, c’mon. Make me cum on your big cock—“
He groans, planting his feet on the ground, before you know it you’re up in the air, now standing. You cut yourself off with a moan, both of you do —sighing out when he lifts your ass up before dropping you on his painfully hard cock. “You’re so filthy when you talk, y’know that?”
It feels like he's all the way to your lungs when he finally bottoms out in you, which would make sense since it feels like you aren’t breathing anymore. You cry out once more, wiling your eyes and muffling the noises in his neck, biting down. “Are you crying?” He asks, concern prodding between his excitement, but the thought manages to make it’s way to his cock, fucking you on him rhytmically slow and deep. You let out a choked sob, “Fuck you’re crying—not even going that fast.”
“Then g-go faster,” You managed to voice out between moans, your hips wiggling in his grasp. He groans in response, kneading your ass to stop you from getting ahead of him.
“You tell me if it’s too much- just, you have to tell me a-alright?” You’re clenching on him, still trying to bounce. “Shit, Okay.”
The slower sounds of your skin slapping each other turn into rapid, sharp sounds. Choso grunting from each thrust, now fully unrepressed. In seconds, the image you’ve crafted of him as this shy, hesitant boy, crumbles. You’re fully moaning out now, his cock nudging deeper and repeatedly in that spot that triggers your insides. “I’m so full, fuck-“
He’s hiccuping his moans out, turning into whimpers as he pumps you up and down even faster, his nails digging into the meat of your ass. “You’re taking me so good baby,” He’s thrusting up when he lets you fall on his cock midway, his muscles forgetting to strain. “Fuck, take it, take it—“
He dives in against your lips, tongue invading your whimpering mouth. You try your best to kiss back, eyes nearly closing while he’s drowning you in him. You’re clenching on his cock a lot tighter now, his balls drenched in your arousal, slapping against your other hole from the impact of his motions.
“I think I—I’m gonna cum-“ You pull away from Choso who lets out a breathy moan, licking your lips to chase yours. You’re falling limp against him, hips rendered useless when he’s already fucking you on a pace outside of your own stamina.
Your insides are pulsing around his member, your moans growing even louder. Choso’s deep enough into you when he feels his cock twitch, “I need to pull out—“ You’re immediately protesting, letting out noises of disapproval. “No, no baby I’m gonna cum if you—“
“I don’t care.“ Fuck. Choso holds himself back, his pre-cum oozing out makes your sopping hole even more slippery at the thought of filling you up to the brim. He’s thinking of ways to keep himself from cumming right this very second when you’re already so fucked out and desperate, high up in your own head.
His dick twitches again and he’s biting his lip, slowing his carry on your body til you’re stopping altogether. Before you could say anything else, he’s pulling out and placing you on the couch, lying down. You’re complaining, spreading your legs as much as the cushions on your side could let you.
Choso’s holding his cock, squeezing at the base to calm himself down but he opens his eyes to your gaping, hungry hole, presented to him like an offer, “C-cum inside me, Cho,”
His resolve breaks within a blink of an eye, already laying above you and wrapping your legs around his waist. You feel like crying out of joy when he finally makes his way inside, thrusting slowly and hissing from how tight you still are. “I need to be on top of you, I need to—“ He mumbled, eyes already hazed out and clambering for satiation.
He topples over you as he finds his balance, now setting a newer pace from earlier, caging you with his body while his thrusts grow even faster.
The sensation is much more different now, a stretch added with the forces of his thrusts now fully landing on you.
He’s watching every twist of your face and moan spill out. Scanning your body downwards while he lays a palm on your lower abdomen, “If I cum inside you’re gonna bulge right h-here, d’ ya want that?”
You’re squealing against him when he presses down, his cock nudging where he’s digging his fingers from the outside. Your walls flutter against his member, sucking him in and pulsing wetly. Choso’s grunting against you, hips growing faster as he watches your eyes get even more hazy and your face twisted.
Your eyes are rolling back when he starts rubbing on your clit, already impatient with wanting to feel your pussy tighten impossibly around him.
He’s whispering incoherencies to you, face on your neck when he pulls back his hips and pushes back in deeply as he continues rubbing you.
You cry out, shuddering against Choso as the coil in you snaps, holding onto his wrist as your legs secured against his ribs.
He lets out a shaky moan, pumping faster when he chases his orgasm while you ride yours out on him, bodies grinding up against each other intimately.
A curse lets you know that he’s finally reached his climax, thrusts growing slow and deep while pumping you full of his sticky cum. Your eyes are glossed over, your throat sore from your own voice when he’s riding out his high, panting and leaving kisses all over your face.
Your chests are pumping against each other, both catching your breaths. Your hand finds its way to his face, turning it so he could look back at you. His cheeks are red and his glasses were no longer on him, probably losing them from how much you’d been switching positions.
You’re brushing his hair from his face, tucking a long strand onto his ear. Your body still feels like it’s on fire but it doesn’t compare to how even after all that, his stare on you still makes your heart skip a beat. You let out a breath, gathering yourself.
“What do you think?” His eyes scans over your face, “Better than coming up to study?”
Choso shifts on his elbows as he’s laying on top of you.“Yeah that was…” He takes a moment to think of a better way to describe it, a smile spreading on his face. “Really good.” He settles with honesty instead.
He’s thumbing over your shoulder, a hundred thoughts trying to materialize themselves in his still mushed up brain. “I’ve never done it like that, before I mean.“
He’s looking up to meet your eyes, and you’ve got a glow emitting from you, drawing him in. He hesitates for a moment but then, “And you? How’d you feel?”
You huff out a soft chuckle, realizing how ironic this all was. How you’ve still managed to not destroy the awkwardness that came with affections even when you’ve skipped over to, well sex. Choso waits for your answer, something swirls tight in his chest, uneasy but still patient.
You’re brushing back the hair on his scalp, taking in how much less guarded he looks without glasses. “Yeah, I feel…safe.”
He smiles, that knot in his chest untangling. To no surprise, he finds the thread it’s bundled from may be connected to you. “Yeah?”
18+… living with your best friends hot older brother is great.. until he becomes a jealous mess…
pairing: choso x roommate fem! reader
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「✦ CHAPTER 9 - Heat ✦」
I was abruptly awakened that morning, pulled from sleep too quickly, like something had dragged me up before I was ready to face it. The space beside me was empty, nothing but cold, crumpled sheets and a dent left behind, a quiet reminder that someone had been there not long ago. It felt strange, how something could disappear so quickly yet still linger in everything else. In the pillow, in the blankets, in the air itself. I could still smell him, faint but present, clinging to fabric and skin in a way that made it impossible to ignore.
And the worst part was I was relieved he wasn’t there.
There was no awkward conversation waiting for me, no forced eye contact, no sober confrontation of what I had done and what it meant. Just silence, and a moment to pretend it hadn’t happened at all. I didn’t give myself enough time to unpack that feeling, didn’t let it sit long enough to understand whether it was guilt or avoidance or something worse.
Because before I could even think the voices cut through it. Loud and sharp. Too loud for this early in the morning.
I shot up, the sudden noise sending a wave of unease through me, heavy and immediate, like something thick had settled over my chest. My heart picked up before I even moved, my body reacting before my mind could catch up.
Was that fighting?
I pushed myself out of bed quickly, the floor colder than expected beneath my feet as I moved toward the door, hesitating only for a second before pulling it open just enough to peek out.
“You told me you were done with that shit, Choso!” Yuji’s voice. Angry.
Not irritated, not annoyed - the kind of anger that came from fear, from something deeper, something that made my stomach drop instantly.
I opened the door a little more, stepping into the hallway just enough to see them properly. Choso’s back was to me, his posture tense, shoulders tight, his hair loose and messier than I had ever seen it, falling unevenly around him like he hadn’t even bothered to tie it back. Yuji stood across from him, his expression twisted in a way that didn’t suit him at all, frustration and something else - something closer to panic bleeding through.
“Why was she here then, huh?” Yuji pressed, his voice rising slightly. “Don’t tell me you’re using again.”
Using?
The word hit strangely, heavier than it should have, my chest tightening slightly as confusion settled in.
“Fucking hell, I’m not using, okay?” Choso snapped, his hands moving as he spoke, sharp and restless, like he couldn’t keep them still. “I just ran into her at the bar and then-”
The bar. The girl in his room.
Something in my chest sank. I shouldn’t have cared. I really shouldn’t have.
And yet I did.
“The bar,” Yuji repeated, disbelief laced through his voice. “Right… seriously, Choso, what’s gotten into you? I thought you were doing better. I thought you were past this.”
“It was just a couple drinks, I’m fine.”
“Don’t lie to me,” Yuji said quickly, stepping forward slightly, his voice dropping but somehow feeling heavier. “I can’t help you if you lie to me. Just tell me the truth.”
There was something raw in his voice now, something desperate that made it clear this wasn’t just an argument, this was something they had been through before.
Something bad.
“What do you want me to say?” Choso snapped, the frustration finally breaking through fully. “That I fucked up? That I’m a bad brother? Fine - I fucked up. Like I always do. That’s all you think of me as anyway, right? Just your messed up, druggie brother so it doesn’t even matter.”
“Choso, I’m—”
“No. Don’t,” he cut him off sharply, already turning away, already shutting it down. “Don’t.”
He turned then, heading straight for his room and that’s when he saw me.
I froze in the doorway, suddenly aware of how out of place I was, like I had stepped into something I wasn’t supposed to witness. His expression shifted the second his eyes landed on me, anger flashing first, sharp and immediate, before something else flickered beneath it something harder to read, something that disappeared just as quickly when he looked away.
He didn’t say anything.
Didn’t even acknowledge me properly.
He just walked past, brushing by like I wasn’t there, the tension following him all the way down the hall before his door slammed shut behind him, the sound echoing through the apartment.
“Choso, wait-” I called after him instinctively, but it was useless.
He didn’t stop.
The silence that followed felt heavier than the shouting.
I stood there for a second, guilt creeping in slowly, settling somewhere uncomfortable in my chest. It felt like I had played a part in something I didn’t fully understand yet, like I had stepped into the middle of something fragile and made it worse just by being there.
My gaze shifted back to Yuji.
He had already sunk down onto the couch, elbows on his knees, his hands pressed against his face like he was trying to hold himself together. I had never seen him like this before. Not once. Not even close.
It made something twist in my chest.
I walked over slowly, sitting beside him, hesitating only for a moment before placing my arm around his shoulders, pulling him slightly closer.
“I don’t know what to do, Y/n…” his voice was quieter now, rougher, like the argument had taken something out of him. “I can’t lose him again.”
The words hit harder than anything else.
Lose him again.
I swallowed, trying to steady myself, trying to be something useful instead of just standing there feeling helpless.
“Hey… we’ll figure it out, okay?” I said softly, reaching for his hand, squeezing it gently until he looked at me. “Talk to me, Yuji.”
He exhaled shakily, dragging a hand down his face before looking away again.
“I don’t want to talk badly about him, but… he needs help,” he admitted, his voice tight. “And I can-I want to-but I don’t know how. Last time it got really bad, Y/n. He wouldn’t come home. He stopped sleeping. It was just parties, drinking… the drugs. All of it.”
My chest tightened.
“He even lost one of his best friends because of it,” Yuji continued, quieter now, like the memory itself weighed too much. “After that… everything just got worse. I thought he was doing better this time. I really did. He was happier. Lighter. I thought-” he paused, shaking his head slightly. “Did I miss something? Should I have seen it coming?”
“No,” I said quickly, squeezing his hand a little tighter. “No, Yuji, this isn’t your fault. Addiction… it’s not that simple. A relapse doesn’t mean he’s gone again. It just means he needs help. And we’ll help him. I promise.”
He let out a breath, but it didn’t sound relieved.
“I can’t help him if he won’t even talk to me.”
A pause settled between us.
“I’ll talk to him,” I said.
Yuji looked at me immediately, concern flickering across his face.
“I don’t want to put that on you, Y/n.”
“He’s my friend too,” I said softly, glancing toward his closed door. “At least… I hope he is.”
But even as I said it something in my chest tightened. Because after last night, I wasn’t sure where I stood anymore.
*
The next few hours unfolded with an almost unbearable slowness, each moment stretching thin and heavy, as though time itself had thickened around me. Every passing minute felt deliberate, weighted by the same persistent thought circling my mind - a plan so deceptively simple in its conception, yet overwhelmingly difficult in its final execution.
I had to speak to Choso.
I had given my word.
And beyond that, perhaps more truthfully - I wanted to.
Seeing him like that unsettled something deep within me, something I could neither name nor fully comprehend. Choso had always carried himself with a quiet certainty, a restrained composure that suggested an unshakeable steadiness. I never had the opportunity to peak into his private life, he led a quiet-busy life. He was never one to command attention, yet he possessed a presence that felt immovable, reliable in a way that required no announcement. Especially when it came to Yuji. The way he cared for him, protected him, it was instinctive, unwavering. He embodied something rare, something quietly admirable. The kind of brother people longed for.
And now that image had fractured. It disturbed me more than I cared to admit. Yet, I didn’t look down upon him.
Because I could not understand it. Not truly. I could not reach into the depths of whatever he was experiencing and claim familiarity, could not offer the hollow comfort of me too without it sounding disingenuous. I feared being brushed off for the lack of life experience to aid him. Anything I said risked feeling superficial, like I was trespassing into something far too complex, far too personal to reduce to borrowed empathy.
Even though, I could not bear the thought of him shutting me out. Even if I had every reason to believe he would.
My mind returned, repeatedly, to the promise I had made Choso. One I had already broken with a carelessness that now made my stomach twist uncomfortably. I could still see the way he had looked at me in that moment, the quiet intensity behind his gaze, the weight of something unspoken yet deeply felt. It had mattered to him. Not casually. Not lightly. Genuinely.
While he was struggling; while he was clearly carrying something far heavier than I had allowed myself to see he had still thought of me. I was too blind, too dumb. Still he tried, in his own restrained way, to protect me, to keep me removed from something he knew would harm me. While I went and discarded it. All that effort.
He still hadn’t emerged from his self-imposed retreat; it felt like everything in there had gone completely still, like he had shut himself away from the rest of the world, keeping everything contained behind that door.
And I understood that more than I wanted to.
There’s a strange kind of comfort in staying confined, in making your world small enough to handle. A room, a closed door, a space where nothing gets in unless you allow it. Out there, everything feels unpredictable, overwhelming but in here, you have control, even if it’s only over something small. It might not be much, but sometimes that small sense of control is enough to make everything else feel a little less unbearable.
I tried to come up with a plan, turning it over in my mind again and again, but the more I thought about it, the further I seemed to drift from any real answer.
*
The three knocks on his door felt impenetrable, I feared the response and what waited for me on the other side. No response, maybe just soft noises from a tv. Background noise. I let a few more gentle knocks and called his name quietly. I didn’t wanna annoy him in anyway, but I needed to talk to him.
Still no response. I grew worried.
Without thinking my hand came down to the handle and softly opened it. I waited for a sound, a noise anything. Still nothing. My worry grew even more. Was he okay?
I opened the door a jar, just enough to see through and in the darkness of his room I could only see his figure in bed, laying motionless. I was too far away from him to see his chest rise and fall.
I thought I’ll just check on him… see if he’s sleeping soundly or not. I would want him to check on me; I wouldn’t mind if he came into my room. I’m not sure if I was just trying to convince myself that it’s okay or not.
I stepped inside, closer to him, closer to his bed. No response.
I keep walking to him, expecting a response, maybe a get out of my room.
I wasn’t even taking in my surroundings; I’ve never been in here yet all I was looking at was the hopefully peaceful sleeping Choso.
Closer now, I could see he was half under the covers but top half out shirtless. I felt myself blush at the sight of him, his incredibly toned body from his band of his pants up.
I was now standing next to his bed looking down at him, my eyes kept drifting, but I was telling myself I was just here to see if he was okay. Not perv on him. I gazed at his chest to see any movement; it was very faint almost hard to see it rise. He was so peaceful and still it felt worrying.
Then all a suddenly he started breathing deeply, basically huffing. His eyebrows contracting. Was he having a nightmare. I couldn’t just watch him like that. I had to wake him. I had to do something.
I reached out, my fingertips then my palm resting on his shoulder, so hot at the touch. Was he getting sick? I gave him a gentle rub, seeing if that would work. But it didn’t. I then accidently gave it a bit rougher causing him to jolt awake. His eyes shot open looking at me half-awake then he grabbed my wrist with his opposite hand within a second. I was then pulled onto the edge of the bed, practically on him. He let go quickly then pulled himself up in the bed.
“Y/N! W-what’s going on? What are you doing here”.
“Oh, I’m sorry that I woke you I just noticed you were having a nightmare”
“Yeah... right but why are in you, my room?”
“Oh, shit yeah no I just came to talk to you”, I quickly got myself up off his bed, taking a step away. Trying to keep my eyes on his, without drifting lower.
“About what?” Was he playing dumb or…
“Um a few things if that’s okay…”
“I’m not really in the mood for chit chat Y/n”, he moved around in bed wiping his face
“I’m sorry.”I forced it out, butting in.
“It’s fine just-”
“No please listen… I’m not good at apologising. I’m sorry for not listening to you. I’m really sorry… I don’t want you to think negatively about me I feel horrible for my actions.”
He looked stunned and even confused. “It’s okay Y/n-”
“No it’s not”, I sat down on his bed, closer to legs rather than him. I couldn’t be too close to him. “You’re kind Choso, you look out for everybody except yourself, and I feel stupid it took me this long to realise. To see you.”
I could feel himself shutting off to me, his exterior grew colder. He got up out of bed and opened his wardrobe putting a top on. I winced at that, how his back muscles flexed at such a simple activity.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.”
“Please don’t shut me out, Choso.”
“I don’t want to talk about him with you, Y/n, I couldn’t care less what you want to do.”
“Obviously you do! You wouldn’t of told me not to.”
He said nothing, just standing in his room, fixing his sleepy hair with his hands.
“I was stupid okay! I made a mistake a really big one.”
“It’s you getting played at the end of the day…”
I got up off his bed and made my way to him, stopping just before him.
“Just because you’re hurting doesn’t give you an excuse to hurt others. You don’t know anything about me.”
“I know your easy enough to go for him.”
“Fuck you, Choso. You don’t know how it feels to be wanted by nobody, to feel invisible, to never be picked or liked back. Calling me easy when I’ve never been with a man before him is low.” I poked his chest. “I know you’re a man whore at least.” I felt so hurt. His dark eyes were burning holes into me. I felt hot all over, like I was shaky in fear talking to him like this. I was meant to be helping him not fighting with him.
“Why choose him then? What’s so special about him?”
“I don’t know, Choso! Maybe because he never looked through me, maybe because he made me feel seen and heard!”
He turned around, I thought he was leaving behind in his room.
“Talk then.” His back was still to me, the moon light was piercing through his room it took be a couple of seconds to adjust.
“What?”
“Say what you want to say to me.”
“I’m worried about you. I didn’t even know you were struggling and that kills me. I’ve never seen you like this. I don’t want to lose you…”
“I’m fucking fine, you know what I’m better than ever.”
“That’s not going to work with me Choso.”
“Why do you even care Y/n, you’re with Geto after all.” He finally turned around.
“No, I’m not. I-I don’t even want to be.”
“Well, you didn’t make that very clear last night!”
“Oh my god Choso, are you serious? What about you huh and that slut?” I could feel myself getting overheated. Why was he always bringing that up. It felt so odd talking about it, especially in his room.
“Why do you care, Y/n.” His look was stern and piercing.
“What do you mean”, I was flustered, I felt like giving in. My true emotions were on show. All I could think of was how I imagined him last night.
“Why does she bother you so much?” he took a step closer to me, I took a step back.
I couldn’t reply to him. My mouth was just left opened. I couldn’t say why, I just couldn’t. I couldn’t say how it pissed me off hearing him fucking somebody else. Having somebody else scream his name. How I wished it was me.
“I think you should leave Y/n.”
“No, I’m not we haven’t finished our conversation.” I grabbed him again so he wouldn’t leave and walk away. It was the truth, yet I had no clue what to say, everything was going so fast.
“You haven’t even answered my question.” He held my wrists to his chest; I could basically feel his breath on my forehead. Heat was pouring from him.
“If I do… it will ruin everything.” I wished I bit my tongue, but it was like I was under his spell, and it came out.
He was shocked I replied, I didn’t say why but it was an answer. He took another step to me, I felt trapped. Yet I craved it. He was so close I could see all of his expressions and he could see mine. He was looking at me as though I was on full display, like he could see through my lies.
He backed away letting me go, slowly, he had to know. I felt like I was hyperventilating. I was terrified of this going wrong. I think I’ve already ruined it.
“Nevermind… it doesn’t matter” I went to go for his door, but he was a step ahead of me and the door shut with a sharp click, and before I could react, the lock slid into place, the sound quiet yet final, echoing in a way that made my chest tighten. It shouldn’t have felt as significant as it did, but suddenly the room felt smaller, the air thicker, like something had shifted into a space we couldn’t step back out of so easily.
I turned slowly, my fingers still hovering near where the handle had been, my breath catching as I looked at him properly.
He hadn’t moved far.
He was still close to the door, one hand lingering against it like he needed the support, his shoulders tense, chest rising slowly but unevenly beneath the thin fabric he had just pulled on. His hair was still loose, falling messily around his face, and there was something about the way he stood there barefoot, half-awake, yet completely alert that made it hard to look away.
“You said it would ruin everything,” he said, voice low, roughened by sleep and something else, something heavier. “So, say it. Ruin it.”
I shook my head instinctively, taking a small step back without thinking, my body reacting before my mind could catch up.
“I didn’t mean it like that-”
“Don’t,” he cut in, pushing off the door.
He moved toward me. Not fast or aggressive but deliberate. His actions were measured. Like he had already decided this wasn’t something he was letting go.
Without realising it, I mirrored him, stepping back again, the distance between us never quite increasing, just shifting, tightening, until the back of my legs hit the edge of his bed. The mattress dipped slightly as I lost my footing for half a second, my hand brushing against it to steady myself.
“You don’t get to say something like that and then pretend it didn’t happen,” he continued, his voice quieter now but heavier, each word landing slower, more intentional. “Not after last night.”
“That’s exactly why I should pretend it didn’t happen,” I shot back, frustration slipping through, my arms folding slightly like I needed something between us. “You’re not even thinking straight right now, you’re just- you’re angry.”
“Yeah,” he said immediately, stepping closer again. “I am.”
The honesty of it caught me off guard, how he didn’t soften it. Didn’t deny it and just owned it.
“And you should be too,” he added, his gaze locking onto mine, unblinking. “But you’re not, are you?”
“I am,” I insisted, though my voice faltered slightly under the weight of his stare.
He tilted his head just slightly, studying me, like he was picking me apart piece by piece.
“Then why him?” he asked, quieter now, but sharper somehow. “Why him out of everyone? You ran to the guy who’d destroy you?”
I exhaled, shaking my head, my fingers tightening against my arms.
“I already told you-”
“No, you didn’t,” he interrupted, stepping in again, closing the space until I had nowhere else to go but back, until my thighs pressed more firmly into the edge of his unmade bed. I could smell him, his room, his bed – it was all him.
“You gave me an excuse,” he continued, his voice dropping. “That’s not the same thing.”
My breath hitched.
He was too close.
Close enough that I could see the tension in his jaw, the slight furrow in his brows, the way his eyes kept flicking between mine like he was searching for something I wasn’t giving him.
“Maybe because he actually wanted me,” I said, forcing the words out, even as my chest tightened. “Maybe because he didn’t hesitate.”
Something flickered across his face.
Quick and sharp.
“And I didn’t?” he asked, quieter now, but there was something underneath it, something almost dangerous.
I hesitated. Because I didn’t know how to answer that. It didn’t make sense to me.
“You- you don’t-” I faltered, my eyes betraying me for a second as they dropped, then quickly snapped back up. “You don’t look at me like that.”
His expression stilled.
“Like what?” he asked, barely above a whisper.
I swallowed, heat creeping up my neck, my body suddenly hyper-aware of how close he was, how little space there was left between us.
“Like I’m wanted.”
The words felt too exposed the second they left me. Too honest. Too late to take back. Silence settled between us, thick and heavy, stretching just long enough to make my pulse spike. His body leaning in just enough that the space between us shrank even further, until I could feel the warmth of him, the steady heat radiating off his skin.
“You really think I don’t look at you like that?” he said quietly.
I couldn’t answer. Because right now - he was. It was overwhelming.
My legs pressed further into the bed frame behind me almost hurting, the pain of it grounding me slightly, but not enough to steady the way my breathing had changed, the way my chest rose a little too quickly. I was going to lose my balance soon.
“Choso…” I said, softer now, but it came out uneven, like a warning I didn’t fully believe in.
He didn’t move away. Instead, he shifted. Not back but so much loser. His body now fully facing mine, close enough that if either of us moved even slightly, we would be touching.
“I had to put up listening to you and him,” he said, his voice rougher now, something darker threading through it. “So don’t stand there and tell me I don’t want you.”
My heart slammed against my ribs.
“And you think I didn’t hear you?” I shot back, the words slipping out before I could stop them.
That landed.
His gaze sharpened immediately.
“Yeah?” he said, stepping even closer, his voice dropping lower. “And what did you hear?”
I should’ve stopped. I knew I should’ve, but I didn’t.
“I heard you with her,” I said, my voice tighter now, my hands dropping from my arms, clenched slightly at my sides. “I heard everything.”
A pause.
Then-
“Did that bother you huh?” he asked.
The question sat between us, heavy, unavoidable. I hesitated truthfully. I wanted to run, leave this behind because fronting this was more difficult than pretending it doesn’t exist.
My lips parted. I knew deep down I couldn’t lie. Not when he was this close. Not when he was looking at me like that. I didn’t think I had it in me.
“…yes,” I admitted, quietly.
Something shifted instantly.
His shoulders lowered slightly, like something had clicked into place, like he had been waiting for that answer.
“Then say it properly,” he murmured. “Say why.”
My breath caught.
“If I do—”
“You already said it would ruin everything,” he interrupted, softer now, but somehow more intense, like the quiet made it worse. “So, what are you waiting for?”
I stared at him, my breath catching as his gaze dropped slow, deliberate; brushing over my lips before dragging back up to my eyes. The proximity was suffocating now, overwhelming, like the air between us had thickened into something tangible. He was too close. Close enough that I could feel the heat of him, the uneven rhythm of his breathing starting to match mine.
“I don’t like hearing you with someone else,” I said, the words unsteady, betraying me the second they left my mouth. “I don’t like thinking about it. I don’t like-”
I stopped, but it didn’t matter.
It was already out there.
“Don’t like what?” he pressed, stepping in that final inch.
The movement knocked something loose in me, my balance giving way as the back of my legs hit the bed and I fell onto it, the mattress dipping beneath me. My fingers immediately tangled into the sheets, gripping them tightly like they could anchor me, like they could steady the way everything inside me had started to spiral.
And there he was.
Standing over me.
Looking down at me.
Through my lashes, I watched him, my chest rising too fast, my thoughts slipping further out of reach. Something about the angle, about the way he loomed there, still and waiting, sent a shiver through me that had nothing to do with fear and everything to do with something far more dangerous.
I shook my head weakly, but it wasn’t enough.
He didn’t move.
Didn’t let it go.
“I don’t like that it’s not me,” I said.
Silence followed.
Not empty.
Not still.
It hummed.
Something thick and charged curling between us, tightening with every second neither of us moved.
His eyes dropped again.
Slower this time.
Lingering.
Tracing.
Taking in the way I looked beneath him, the way my grip tightened in his sheets, the way my breathing had changed.
And neither of us moved. Not away. Not yet. Neither of us wanted to move.
The silence didn’t just hold, It fractured roughly.
His hand came to your face without warning, firm and unyielding, fingers pressing into your jaw as his other hand tangled into your hair, tightening against the strands tied back, forcing your head to tilt exactly how he wanted it. The movement was controlled but impatient, like he had run out of restraint all at once. There was something unspoken in the movement - something that had been restrained too long, now surfacing without permission.
“Fuck it,” he breathed, barely audible.
And then he kissed you.
It wasn’t clean.
Your mouths collided more than met, teeth catching awkwardly at first, your breath stuttering against his as neither of you found the rhythm straight away. It was clumsy in that first second, all pent-up tension and misjudged angles, but neither of you pulled back. Neither of you even tried.
Because just as quickly, it shifted.
His grip in your hair adjusted, tugging just enough to angle you better, his mouth pressing into yours again, slower this time, more deliberate, like he was learning you in real time, like he refused to get it wrong twice. Your lips moved against his, hesitant for only a moment before falling into it, finding that same rhythm, that same intense pull.
Inside you felt like electricity, energy bursting within you from his touch alone. It felt right.
And then it deepened.
The hesitation disappeared completely, replaced by something heavier, something that made your chest tighten and your fingers instinctively curl into him. Your hands found his forearms first, gripping tightly, feeling the tension there, the flex of muscle beneath your palms, the heat of him grounding you while undoing you at the same time. Beneath your touch for the first time, you felt his pounding. How his heart rate spiked as your fingertips ran across prominent veins, taking all of him in.
He bent further over you, closing the space completely, his body hovering over yours, his grip tightening slightly like he didn’t trust you not to disappear if he loosened it. The kiss grew more certain, more consuming, his breath uneven against yours as if he was trying to take something instead of just share it.
Your hand slipped from his arm to his hip, fingers pressing into him, pulling him closer without thinking, closing that last inch between you. Longing to close the distance.
He didn’t resist.
If anything, he leaned into it, shuddering from your needy touch.
Then.
A knock.
Sharp. Too loud. Too close.
“Hey, Choso… can we talk about earlier… please.”
Yuji.
You pulled back instinctively, your breath breaking, lips parted, swollen, your chest rising too fast as reality crashed back in all at once. He had kissed you. Your eyes flickered up to him, wide, uncertain, your body still angled toward his like it hadn’t caught up yet and like you belonged to him.
But he didn’t move away, not entirely at least.
He pulled away his forehead, his breathing still uneven, his eyes still locked onto your face like he hadn’t registered anything outside this room. It felt like a dream, looking up at him, seeing all his features in such a lewd position – especially because of what it was doing to me physically.
“Choso?” Yuji called again, softer now, more hesitant. “Please.”
“Yeah…” he answered at last, though his voice carried none of his usual composure, roughened, distant, as though it had been pulled from him without his full attention. “I’ll be out in a second.”
His hands didn’t leave you.
If anything, they shifted painfully slow.
One slid from your hair, both coming to your face now, framing it, holding you there like he needed you steady in front of him. His thumb brushed slowly across your lips, dragging over them, smearing the warmth that still lingered there from the kiss.
Both coming to cradle your face now, holding it with a steadiness that contrasted the intensity of moments before. His thumb brushed across your lips, slow, deliberate, tracing the shape of them as though committing them to memory, as though unwilling to let the sensation fade so quickly.
“Y/n was just talking to me about it,” he continued, his voice quieter now, but no less distracted, his gaze never leaving her. “I’m fine.”
“You don’t sound fine,” Yuji replied from the other side, concern threading through his tone.
Choso exhaled, but it did little to steady him.
“I said I’m fine,” he answered, softer now, though the firmness remained.
His attention did not shift.
His thumb pressed more fully against my lower lip, drawing it down slightly, inviting, coaxing, until my mouth parted beneath the pressure. The gesture was unhurried, almost contemplative, as though he was studying my reaction, watching the way my breath caught, the way my body responded without thought.
Your breath caught.
Your lips parted instinctively. Letting him in.
And he noticed.
Of course he did.
His gaze dropped immediately, following the movement, darkening slightly as his thumb hovered there for a second- just a second before slipping just past your lips.
Not sudden.
Not forced.
Slow.
Measured.
It brushed first against my teeth, the contact light, exploratory, before easing further, grazing the warmth within, a subtle, intimate intrusion that seemed to suspend the air around them entirely. His breath shifted, barely perceptible, as though even that small connection anchored him more than anything else had.
“Choso…?” Yuji’s voice came again, quieter now, uncertain.
“Yeah,” Choso answered, but his voice had dropped again, lower, distracted, like he was barely holding onto the conversation anymore. “Give me a minute.”
His thumb moved slightly, a slow, measured motion, tracing, testing, as though he were learning her in the smallest, most deliberate way, the intensity of his gaze never wavering from her face, from the way she looked beneath him - flustered, breathless, completely and utterly undone.
You couldn’t move.
Couldn’t speak.
A warmth pooled within, heavy and unfamiliar, yet undeniably real, coiling tighter with every second he remained there, with every slow movement of his hand against her face. It made my stomach flutter, not softly, not delicately, but in a way that felt overwhelming, like something had taken hold beneath her ribs and refused to let go.
Thighs pressed together instinctively. A subtle movement at first.
Then again.
As if seeking relief from something I didn’t fully understand but felt everywhere at once.
My breath came shallow, uneven, catching each time his thumb shifted inside my mouth, each slow, deliberate motion sending a sharp, electric sensation that made her chest tighten and her thoughts blur at the edges.
A quiet sound slipped from her before she could stop it.
Soft.
Uncontrolled.
A faint hum against him as her lips closed around his finger.
He felt the change, how her cheeks which were red and usually full were collapsing in around him. Sucking. Wanting. Needing. He saw how she couldn’t stay still, moving her hips against her underwear.
Her fingers tightened where they still held onto him, her body betraying her in ways she couldn’t conceal, couldn’t steady, the tension building and building with nowhere to go.
Her stomach twisted again, tighter this time, that same restless, aching pull settling lower, heavier, making her feel unsteady in her own skin, like she was balancing on the edge of something she had never quite experienced before. A feeling forbidden and foreign.
And the way he was looking at her- watching every reaction, every small shift, every breath she couldn’t control only made it worse.
Like nothing outside this moment existed. And even with Yuji right on the other side of the door patiently waiting. Choso didn’t pull away. Didn’t let go. Like he hadn’t decided to stop yet.
18+… living with your best friends hot older brother is great.. until he becomes a jealous mess…
pairing: choso x roommate fem! reader
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「✦ CHAPTER 8 - Somebody Else Pt.2 ✦」
I had kept myself busy for most of the day, filling every hour with something that demanded just enough attention to keep my mind from slipping, stacking task on top of task until it all blurred into one long stretch of movement, my hands doing what they needed to while everything else drifted somewhere heavier, somewhere I didn’t want to look too closely at. By the time work ended, I didn’t feel done, just emptied out, like I had been scraped hollow and left standing anyway, expected to keep going like nothing inside me had shifted.
I didn’t go home. I didn’t even think about it properly.
My body just kept moving, like it had already decided for me.
By the time I stopped, I was standing outside the bar. I lingered there longer than I should have, shoulders tense beneath my jacket, jaw tight, the rain misting faintly against my skin as the noise from inside bled out through the door every time it opened. It felt like standing at the edge of something I already knew the ending to, like watching myself about to make the same mistake twice and not stepping in to stop it.
And then I went in anyway.
The warmth hit first, thick with alcohol and something stale beneath it, the kind of smell that settled into your clothes and stayed there long after you left. It wrapped around me instantly, familiar in a way that made something in my chest pull tight instead of relaxing. I slid onto a stool, elbows resting against the counter, fingers flexing once before I spoke.
“Whiskey.”
The glass came quickly. I didn’t hesitate.
The burn was harsher than I remembered, dragging down my throat and settling low, spreading through me like something waking up again, something I had tried to keep buried. I exhaled slowly through my nose, shoulders dropping just slightly, the tension loosening at the edges.
“Another?” the bartender asked.
I didn’t even look at him. “Yeah.”
By the second drink, the world had softened just enough to make everything quieter, the noise in my head dulled to something more manageable, like it had been pushed further away but not gone. I stared into the glass, watching the liquid shift with each small movement, trying not to let my thoughts drift back to her, but failing anyway.
The sound of heels against the floor pulled my attention before the voice did.
“Hey… can I sit here?”
I didn’t need to look up to know who it was, that walk that voice was all to familiar. An old demon I wished stayed in my old life.
My hand tightened slightly around the glass, the condensation slick against my palm.
“Sit.”
She slid into the seat beside me like she had done it a hundred times before, close enough that her thigh brushed mine for a second longer than necessary, her presence immediate, invasive in a way that felt deliberate. The faint scent of her perfume cut through the alcohol-heavy air, something sweet layered over something sharper, something familiar enough to make my stomach twist.
“I didn’t think I’d see you here again,” she said, her voice light but her eyes already scanning me, taking in everything, lingering just long enough to feel intentional. “Thought you were done with this.”
“I was.”
She tilted her head slightly, lips curving in a way that wasn’t quite a smile, her gaze flicking down to the drink in my hand before returning to my face.
“Was?” she repeated softly.
I didn’t answer.
Her elbow rested on the table, chin propped lazily into her palm as she leaned in just slightly, closing the space between us without asking.
“It’s good to see you,” she added, quieter now.
“Yeah,” I muttered, eyes still on my glass. “You too.”
Her gaze dragged over me slowly, unapologetic, like she was measuring something, like she was trying to find the version of me she used to know. She was testing the waters.
“You look better,” she said, reaching out before I could react, her fingers brushing lightly against my forearm before settling there, her thumb starting a slow, repetitive motion. “Cleaner. Like you’ve been behaving.”
“Funny,” I said, glancing at her briefly. “Was thinking the opposite about you.”
She laughed, soft and unbothered, like it didn’t touch her.
“You’re always being like that,” she said, leaning in a little closer, her shoulder nearly brushing mine now. “No filter.”
“What do you want, seriously?” I asked, sharper this time, my patience already thinning.
Her thumb didn’t stop moving.
“Nothing,” she said lightly, but her fingers pressed just a little firmer against my skin. “Can’t I just talk to you?”
I gave her a look.
She smiled, slow, knowing. “Okay, maybe not nothing.”
“Figures.”
“I missed you,” she said, her voice dropping just enough to feel more real, her gaze holding mine now, steady, searching.
“Don’t,” I said immediately, my jaw tightening. “Don’t do that.”
“Do what?” she asked, tilting her head, her hair falling slightly as she leaned closer, eyes narrowing just enough to show she was reading me.
“Act like this is anything other than what it is.”
“And what is it?” she asked softly, her thumb slowing slightly, like she was waiting for the answer.
I exhaled, dragging a hand briefly over my face. “You tell me.”
She leaned back just enough to look at me properly, her lips pressing together in a way that almost looked thoughtful.
“You always did this,” she murmured. “Push people away, then sit there like you don’t want them to leave.”
“I left,” I said, the words coming out sharper than I intended.
Her brow lifted slightly. “Did you?”
That landed heavier than it should have.
I reached for my glass, finishing it in one go.
“Another,” I muttered.
She watched me closely now, her body angled toward me, fully focused.
“You’re not doing great, are you?” she said, her voice softer, less teasing, more certain.
I let out a quiet breath. “You’re one to talk.”
“Yeah,” she shrugged, a small smile tugging at her lips. “But at least I don’t pretend.”
Her hand slid slightly higher up my arm, fingers pressing into muscle, testing, grounding.
“Come on,” she added, leaning in again, her voice brushing closer to my ear. “You don’t miss it? Not even a little?”
“I don’t. I left for a reason. You’re guna need to get a new plug.”
She paused.
Then smiled again.
“Liar.”
My jaw tightened, but I didn’t pull away.
“I’m going back to rehab soon,” she said, watching my reaction carefully. “Couple weeks, mum found my stash – I guess I’m shit at hiding stuff.”
“Good,” I muttered.
Her fingers traced lightly along my arm now, slower, more deliberate.
“So I figured…” she leaned closer again, her breath warm near my ear, “one last night. One last hoorah!”
Of course.
“And you think I’m part of that?” I asked, turning my head just enough to meet her gaze.
“I know you are,” she said simply, her eyes steady, unblinking.
I shook my head slightly. “You don’t know anything then.”
“I know you’re here,” she said, glancing down at the empty glass in my hand before looking back up. “That’s enough for me.”
Silence stretched between us, thick, heavy. Full of unsaid words.
“You guna pretend you don’t want it?” she asked quietly, picking at my corners needlessly. I didn’t answer. Because I didn’t know if I didn’t or if I just didn’t want to admit that I did. And the longer I sat there.
The less I cared about the difference.
The bathroom felt too small the second the door shut behind us, the air thick and stale, carrying that faint chemical sharpness that hadn’t quite left no matter how many times places like this tried to clean themselves up. The light above flickered once before settling, too bright, too unforgiving, casting everything in a harsh clarity I didn’t want. Graffiti all over the walls.
I should’ve walked out.
The thought came immediately, clear and steady, cutting through the haze just enough to remind me of what I was doing, of where this led, of how many times I had stood in rooms exactly like this telling myself it would be the last time.
“Relax,” she murmured, already moving like she had done this a hundred times, her hands quick, practiced, spreading everything out across the counter like it was routine, like it was nothing. “You look like you’re about to bolt.”
“I should,” I said, voice low, rougher than I intended, my hands braced against the edge of the sink as I watched her.
She glanced up at me, a small smile tugging at her lips, not surprised, not concerned, just… familiar.
“But you won’t,” she said simply.
That hit harder than it should have because she was right. So fucking right. I knew exactly what this was. I knew the pattern, knew how it started, how it ended, how it hollowed you out piece by piece until you didn’t recognise what was left. I had fought too hard to get out of it, to pull myself back into something steadier, something clean.
Yuji.
The thought of him flickered through my mind, sharp and immediate, the image of him too easy to place, too easy to disappoint. I swallowed hard.
“I told myself I wouldn’t do this again,” I muttered, more to myself than to her.
She paused for a second, just long enough to look at me properly, head tilting slightly.
“You tell yourself a lot of things,” she said softly. “Doesn’t mean they stick babe.”
My jaw tightened.
“Don’t,” I said, sharper now.
“Don’t what?” she asked, though she knew.
“Act like this doesn’t matter. I can’t keep doing this, we can’t… You know what happened to Jake.”
She leaned back slightly, crossing her arms loosely, studying me like I was something she was trying to figure out, or maybe something she already understood too well.
“It matters because you make it matter,” she said. “You always did that. Took everything too seriously, like you had something to prove. Jake… he didn’t know when to stop.”
“I did,” I snapped, the words slipping out before I could stop them. “I still do.”
Her expression softened just slightly, not pitying, just… knowing.
“And how’s that working for you?” she asked quietly.
That shut me up. Because I didn’t have an answer. Because standing there, in that moment, it didn’t feel like it had worked at all. It felt like I had just circled right back to the same place. She turned back to the counter then, finishing what she had started, movements smooth, effortless, like muscle memory had taken over.
“You don’t have to do anything,” she added, almost casually. “You can walk out. I’m not stopping you.” She grabbed the baggy out of her purse along with a card.
I stared at the door.
It was right there.
All I had to do was turn, take a few steps, leave. Go home. That should be easy but I felt like a coward because my feet didn’t move. Instead, my grip tightened on the edge of the sink, knuckles whitening slightly as I exhaled slowly, trying to steady something that didn’t want to be steadied.
“I hate this,” I said quietly.
“I know,” she replied just as softly.
A pause. Then.
“I missed it too.” That did it. Something in me gave, not all at once, not dramatically, just a quiet, almost imperceptible shift, like a crack spreading through something that had already been weakened long before this moment. I let out a slow aching breath, dragging a hand down my face, the weight of it settling in my chest. It took a toll on me to admit the truth.
“Just this once,” I muttered, even as I said it, knowing exactly how hollow it sounded. I gathered a random note from my wallet, rolling it perfectly like I’m so used too.
She didn’t argue and didn’t need to. She just stepped aside slightly, giving me space, giving me the choice she knew I had already made. That was the worst part because it was a choice. Every second of it. I hesitated for one last moment, something tight and painful twisting in my chest, something that felt a lot like regret before I had even done anything.
Then I gave in. The second I did - everything else started to fall away again.
The air outside hit colder than it had any right to, sharp against my skin as we stepped out of the bar, the noise of it swallowing itself behind us like it had never happened at all. For a second, I just stood there, letting it settle, the alcohol and everything else sitting heavy in my system, my head not quite clear, not quite gone either, just caught somewhere in between where nothing felt stable. We had some drinks, talked too much as she shared too much. Gum in cheek.
“You’re quiet,” she said beside me, her hand already sliding around my arm again like it belonged there, her body leaning into mine without hesitation.
“I’m always quiet,” I muttered, glancing down the street instead of at her.
“Not like this,” she said, her fingers tightening slightly, nails pressing just enough to ground me back into my body. “You used to talk more when you were like this.”
“Yeah,” I exhaled, voice low. “That was the problem.”
She laughed softly at that, not understanding, or maybe just choosing not to, her head tipping slightly toward my shoulder as she leaned in closer, her weight familiar in a way that felt wrong now, like putting on something that used to fit but didn’t anymore.
“You think too much now,” she murmured. “It doesn’t suit you.”
“Funny,” I said, pulling my arm slightly but not enough to move her. “Was thinking the same about you.”
“Still sharp,” she smiled, glancing up at me. “Guess some things don’t change.”
The Uber pulled up too quickly, headlights cutting across us in a way that made everything feel momentarily too bright, too exposed. I slid into the backseat first, she followed without asking, her thigh pressing against mine immediately, her hand settling back onto my thigh like it had never left.
“You still live in the same place?” she asked, her voice quieter now, the city noise muffled behind the glass.
“Yeah.”
“With your brother?”
“Yeah.”
She hummed softly, her fingers tracing slow patterns against my arm, absent-minded but deliberate enough that I felt every movement.
“Cute,” she said. “Didn’t take you for the domestic type.”
“I’m not,” I replied flatly.
“Mm,” she smiled faintly. “Could’ve fooled me.”
The car moved through the streets in a blur of lights and reflections, everything outside smearing together in a way that made it hard to focus on anything for too long. My head leaned back slightly, eyes half-lidded, but my thoughts didn’t quiet the way I wanted them to. They kept circling back. Her. The apartment. What I had left there. What I might be walking back into.
“You’re fading off again, darl,” she said softly, shifting closer, her head brushing my shoulder now.
“Just tired.”
“That’s not it,” she murmured, her voice almost amused, like she could see straight through it. “You always get like this when something’s bothering you.”
I didn’t answer. Because she wasn’t wrong. I just didn’t want her to be right.
“Is it a girl?” she pressed, tilting her head to look at me properly now.
My jaw tightened slightly.
“Don’t, no its not.” I spoke, foul taste in the back of my throat.
“So it is.” She smiled anyway.
“Not your business.” I let out a slow breath through my nose, turning my head just enough to look out the window again.
“Never stopped you before,” she said lightly, her hand sliding a little higher now, testing boundaries that felt thinner than they should have been.
“That was different.”
“Was it?” she asked, watching me closely.
I didn’t respond.
The rest of the ride stretched out in a quiet that wasn’t comfortable, just heavy, filled with things unsaid, things I didn’t want to unpack, not now, not like this. By the time the car slowed, pulling into the street outside my place, something in my chest had already started to tighten again, that same feeling creeping back in, the one I had tried to drown hours ago.
I stepped out first, the cold air hitting harder this time, sharper, cutting through the haze just enough to make everything feel too real again.
And that’s when I saw it.
The car.
Parked just off to the side.
Familiar in a way that made something in my stomach drop before I could even place why.
I slowed slightly, eyes lingering on it a second too long.
“You coming or what?” she called behind me, grabbing my arm again, pulling me forward before I could think about it too much.
“Yeah,” I muttered, dragging my gaze away.
But it stayed with me. That feeling lingering. Something just not sitting right.
The hallway felt quieter than usual as we stepped inside, the air heavier, like something had already happened here, something I had missed. She moved ahead of me slightly now, more comfortable, more certain, like she had already decided how the night would go.
“You always keep it this clean?” she asked, glancing around, her voice echoing softly in the space.
“I don’t,” I said, closing the door behind us.
“Someone’s been busy then,” she added, almost teasing.
That made something in my chest tighten again.
I hadn’t lit a candle. I hadn’t cleaned. I hadn’t - The smell hit me then. Vanilla. Caramel. Soft, but unmistakable. Like it had been there for a while. Like someone had made an effort. My steps slowed.
“What?” she asked, turning back slightly when she noticed.
“Nothing,” I said, but it didn’t sound right, even to me.
My gaze moved through the space slowly now, taking in details I hadn’t noticed at first, things slightly out of place, slightly off, like the room had shifted without me there.
And then I saw it, the jacket. Draped causally over the chair like it belonged there.
Like he belonged there. I stopped dead in my tracks. Because I already knew. Every mark. Every cigarette burn. Every damn detail. They of those were stories, most of ours.
Geto.
My jaw tightened. This didn’t sit right but nothing about this did. Because he wouldn’t just show up, he wasn’t that type and he wasn’t friends with Yuji. Not without a reason. And the realisation didn’t hit all at once. It settled in slowly. Then heavy and unavoidable. A burning sensation I wanted to go away.
He wasn’t just here.
He had been let in.
As that thought fully landed something in my chest twisted, sharp and sudden, cutting through everything else. That meant she had wanted him here. Somehow, even through the haze, even through everything I had taken to not feel - that was the thing that hit the hardest.
Or so I thought, once we made our way to my room through the pounding of my heart in my ears, I heard a delicate, soft moan.
It was her. It had to be.
I knew that voice better than I ever should have, not because she ever tried to be heard, but because she didn’t. Because she was quiet, careful, the kind of voice that made you lean in without realising it, that shifted just slightly when something got pulled out of her. I had learned it over time, piece by piece, standing too close to that wall on nights I shouldn’t have, hand pressed flat against it like I could feel something through it, like it would bring me closer.
I had imagined it before. What she looked like. How she moved and how her body would react. What she sounded like when she stopped holding back.
And now - now I knew it was him in there with her.
Something in my chest twisted hard, sharp enough to make my jaw lock, my hands curling at my sides before I could stop it. The image forced itself into my head, uninvited, vivid in a way that made my skin feel too tight, like I needed to get out of it or tear something apart just to breathe properly.
He was touching her. In ways I. No.
I dragged a breath in, but it did nothing to settle it. If anything, it fed it, made everything louder, heavier, harder to ignore. The anger didn’t stay clean either, didn’t stay just anger. It tangled with something else, something darker, something that made it impossible to stand still. Because part of me didn’t just want to stop it, part of me wanted to replace it.
My head snapped to the side, the tension spilling over too quickly, too suddenly, my body moving before I had fully decided to. I shut my door behind me, not even thinking to lock it, not thinking about anything except the pressure building in my chest that needed somewhere to go. She was still there. Just watching me and patiently waiting. I crossed the room in seconds.
My hands found her, lifting her like it was nothing, like I needed to feel something solid, something real in my grip, pushing her back against the wall - that wall - without thinking about what it meant, without stopping to question why that was where I chose.
“Choso-” she gasped, but I was already too far gone to slow down.
My mouth crashed into hers, rough, unsteady, more force than intention behind it, like I was trying to drown something out instead of feel anything real. The taste of alcohol lingered on our tongues, wet and hot. She reacted instantly, hands pulling at me, trying to match it, trying to keep up, but it didn’t land the way it used to. Nothing did.
Because even with her right there, I could still hear it. Faintly through the wall. My grip tightened without meaning to, a low breath leaving me as I pulled back just enough to look at her, though I wasn’t really seeing her, not properly.
“On your knees,” I said, the words coming out rougher than I expected, heavier, edged with something I didn’t recognise in myself.
She didn’t question it. She never did. She dropped immediately to her knees, hands already moving, familiar, practiced, like we had done this a hundred times before, like this was easy. It used to be. I leaned one hand against the wall, the other dragging back through my hair, my head tipping slightly as I closed my eyes for a second and that was my mistake.
Because the second I did I heard it again. Clearer and so much closer.
My breath caught, sharp, my jaw tightening as something in my chest twisted again, harder this time, deeper, like it was digging in instead of passing through. I wasn’t here. Not really and not even close. Because no matter how much I tried to ground myself in what was happening my mind kept slipping to her. Back to the way I knew she sounded.
My hand dropped from my hair slowly, fingers curling slightly as I exhaled through my nose, and the only thing keeping me there; the only thing making any of this feel like anything at all was what I could still hear through the wall.
His hand braced hard against the wall, fingers splayed like he needed something solid to hold onto, something that wouldn’t shift the way everything else was shifting inside him. His head tipped forward slightly, eyes screwed shut, not out of focus but because it was the only way he could see it clearer.
Hear it clearer.
Every sound that slipped through the wall felt closer than it should have been, like it had bypassed distance entirely and settled somewhere under his skin. It wasn’t just noise anymore; it wasn’t just something happening in another room.
It felt like it was happening to him.
His other hand moved without thinking, instinctive, guiding, controlling, needing something tangible to ground himself in, but it didn’t anchor him the way it should have. It didn’t pull him back into the room, didn’t remind him where he was.
He intertwined his fingers through her hair softly at first but firm and hard grabbing a bunch of it. She looked up at him with glassy eyes, a sinful look in her eyes and a whole mouth full of him. She hummed into him, vibrating his tip all the way to his base where his black trimmed hair touched her swollen lips. With that hand full of her hair, he moved her, slowly at first finding a pace she could work with. Getting her all warmed up. She ran her hands over his thighs while he quickened the movement.
His breath came heavier now, uneven, catching slightly as another sound carried through, softer but clearer in his mind than anything in front of him. His jaw tightened, teeth pressing together as something sharp twisted in his chest again, something that felt dangerously close to snapping.
He could picture it. Too easily.
The way she would look. The way her body would react. The way her voice would change, soften, break just slightly in a way he had memorised without ever meaning to. What would her pretty little mouth look like around me.
“Fuck…” the word slipped out under his breath, low, strained, not even directed at anything in front of him.
Because it wasn’t about what was in front of him. It was about what wasn’t.
His grip shifted unconsciously, tightening, then loosening again, like he was trying to regulate something he couldn’t quite control. His forehead dropped closer to his arm against the wall, breath fanning warm against his skin as he exhaled sharply.
This wasn’t right. None of it was and he knew that. Knew exactly what he was doing, knew exactly what it meant, knew how far he had slipped in a matter of hours.
Still, he didn’t and couldn’t stop. Stopping would mean thinking and thinking would mean facing it. Facing her. Facing the fact that no matter what he did, no matter who was in front of him - it wasn’t enough. It wasn’t her.
Another sound carried through the wall, quieter now but no less cutting, and something in him twisted again, deeper this time, more final, like it had settled into place instead of passing through.
His eyes opened slowly. Just… empty in a way that hadn’t been there before.
Because the truth had already sunk in, heavy and unavoidable. He wasn’t here to feel anything. He was here to escape it. He was a professional at escaping things, shoving things so far down he felt nothing. And it wasn’t working.
His grip tightened in her hair as he pulled her up, not gently, not carefully, forcing her to meet him halfway as his mouth crashed against hers, the kiss messy and consuming, like he was trying to take something rather than share it. There was no softness in it, no patience, just pressure and heat and something barely controlled beneath it, like he was fighting himself as much as he was holding onto her.
Her hands clutched at him, trying to keep up, trying to match the intensity, but he was already pulling away, already moving, lifting her again with a suddenness that made her breath hitch as he carried her to the bed. The movement wasn’t careful, wasn’t slow, just purposeful, like he needed to get there before something in him snapped completely. She could tell he snapped but had no clue of the cause.
He guided her down on all fours, positioning her without hesitation, his hands firm, directing rather than asking, leaving no room for uncertainty in what he wanted. Her hair spread out onto is charcoal pillow. His breathing was uneven now, heavier, his chest rising and falling as he hovered behind her for a second longer than necessary. His ran his member through her lips, glistening slick covering him as he pumped himself. The motion was quick as he lined up with her cunt, pushing in with no resistance. They both groaned a heavy and hot moan.
His jaw clenched, his hands pausing briefly as he steadied himself, dragging in a breath that didn’t do anything to calm him.
Then he moved again, rocking himself into her. Each time closer and more deliberate.
His touch wasn’t gentle, but it wasn’t careless either, controlled in a way that made it feel intentional, like every movement had weight behind it, like he was trying to ground himself in something physical when everything in his head refused to stay still.
“Stay still,” he said low, voice rough, edged with something heavier than before.
But even as he said it; even as he tried to focus on what was right in front of him his mind was still somewhere else entirely. No matter how much he tried to push it down it wouldn’t stay there. The sound of her angelic voice didn’t leave him.
It stayed lodged somewhere deep, echoing in a way that made it impossible to think straight, impossible to separate what was happening here from what was happening just on the other side of that wall. It wrapped around his thoughts, tightened in his chest, dragged his focus completely away from the room he was standing in.
Geto’s name being called. Again. Louder.
Like it didn’t cost her anything to give it.
Something in him snapped. His grip tightened suddenly, fingers digging into her waist, holding her there with a firmness that bordered on rough, like he needed something solid to anchor himself before everything inside him came apart. His breath came heavier now, sharper, his jaw locked tight as he drove himself forward harder, faster, the rhythm losing any sense of control it had before.
“Fucking hell Choso, g-give it to me please”, She could hardly speak while being pumped full of him recklessly. It wasn’t measured anymore. It wasn’t steady. It was sheer force and frustration. Something darker that he couldn’t contain anymore.
“Choso—Fu-” she gasped beneath him, her voice catching at the change, at the sudden intensity, her hands scrambling to keep up, to hold onto him as he pushed forward with more urgency than before.
But he barely heard her. All he could hear - was you. Every sound through the wall sharpened, clearer now, like his mind had tuned everything else out just to focus on it. The way your voice carried, the way it broke, the way it rose higher than he had ever heard before; it hit him in waves, each one heavier than the last.
It made his chest feel tight. Too tight. His hand pressed harder into her waist, holding her in place, like he was trying to match something he couldn’t see, couldn’t touch, couldn’t reach no matter how much force he put behind it.
“Fuck-” it slipped out under his breath, strained, uneven, his head dropping slightly as his eyes squeezed shut again. Because he could picture it. Too clearly. It was tipping him to a point of finishing.
Geto.
You.
The way you sounded. The way you said his name like it belonged there. His pace faltered for half a second then picked up again, harder and a lot faster. Like he was trying to outrun it. Like if he pushed enough, if he moved enough, if he drowned himself in something physical - it would stop. He tightened his grip again, almost instinctively, like he needed to prove something, like he needed to feel in control of at least one thing in that moment - even if everything else was slipping through his fingers.
He was wondering how the hell he was going to look at you the same after this night.
He couldn’t.
Not after hearing your voice like that, not after knowing how easily you gave yourself to someone else, how it settled into his chest and refused to leave. It didn’t feel like anger anymore, not clean enough for that. It felt heavier. Possessive. Wrong.
Because all he could think about now was how badly he wanted to erase it. Every trace of him. Every sound. Every memory. Replace it with something that belonged to him instead.
And the worst part was he didn’t know if he wanted to stop himself.
18+… living with your best friends hot older brother is great.. until he becomes a jealous mess…
pairing: choso x roommate fem! reader
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「✦ CHAPTER 7 - Somebody Else Pt.1 ✦」
It started as something small.
A shift. A dull thud through the wall, like something knocked lightly out of place, followed by the faint scrape of movement that didn’t belong to pipes or wind or the settling of an old apartment. At first, I told myself it was nothing, just the building carrying sound the way it always did, distorting it, dragging it through walls until it lost meaning.
But then it came again.
Clearer this time.
A creak.
Slow. Rhythmic.
Unmistakable.
My body went still beneath it, breath catching without permission as my ears tuned in before I could stop them, before I could choose not to listen. The rain outside blurred into the background, the soft patter replaced by something else entirely, something far more present, far more intrusive. His room. It had to be. And then a sound that made my stomach tighten. A voice that wasn’t his. Soft at first, barely there, like it didn’t want to be heard. But the walls were thin. Too thin. The kind that didn’t keep anything private, that let everything bleed through whether you wanted it to or not.
I felt it then, sharp and sudden. That painful twist in my chest that lingered.
Geto’s presence was right there, close, grounding in a way that should have been enough, his attention fully on me, his touch steady, deliberate, like he was trying to pull me into the moment, keep me there. And I let him, I did, forcing myself to focus on what was right in front of me, on the warmth, the closeness, the way he moved with easy confidence like nothing in the world could distract him. I was torn between the way he was touching me and the truth behind the walls.
But it didn’t matter.
Because I could still hear it.
The creak of the bed next door, louder now, less subtle, the rhythm harder to ignore. The soft, breathless sounds that followed, slipping through the wall like they had no right to be there, like they didn’t belong in my space but refused to stay contained in his.
It felt too intimate.
Too close.
Like I was part of something I shouldn’t be.
My breath faltered, just slightly, and I felt Geto pause for a fraction of a second, not pulling away, not stopping, just noticing. He always noticed.
“Hey,” he murmured, voice low, almost amused. “Earth to Y/n.”
“I’m sorry,” I said quickly, but it came out thinner than I wanted, my focus already slipping again despite myself.
Another sound slipped through the wall. My jaw tightened. Geto followed my gaze for a fraction of a second, just enough to understand. And then he smiled. Slow. Knowing.
“Oh,” he exhaled softly, something almost entertained threading through it. “That’s what’s got you distracted?”
Heat crept up my neck immediately, a mix of embarrassment and something sharper I didn’t want to name. The image in my mind of what was happening next door, who it was and what they were doing.
“It’s nothing,” I muttered.
“Doesn’t sound like nothing,” he said lightly, tilting his head just slightly, like he was listening now too, like he found it amusing instead of intrusive.
Another creak.
Another soft sound made my stomach twist unpleasantly.
Geto’s attention snapped back to me, sharper now, more focused, his hand steadying me more firmly, like he was pulling me back into place.
“Don’t tell me you’re listening,” he added, voice quieter now, but edged with something playful. “I didn’t think you were that dirty huh?”
“I’m not—” I started, but it fell apart halfway through.
Because I was. And he knew it, he knew how my attention was elsewhere. A quiet breath of laughter left him, low and warm, not mocking, just… entertained.
“Relax,” he murmured, leaning closer, his voice brushing near my ear. “If they’re gonna be loud, we can be louder.”
My breath caught at that, sharp and immediate, something in my chest tightening in a completely different way now.
“Geto-” I tried, but he cut me off gently, not with words, but with the way his hand shifted, more intentional now, more deliberate, grounding me back into him, into the moment, into something that demanded attention. Before he was just using his mouth, but how one of his hands came from around my hip to my entrance. He dragged his fingers slowly, almost torturously so, tracing a lingering path at her sensitive core. It made my breath catch before I could stop it. The pace of it was deliberate, unhurried, like he knew exactly what he was doing - how far to go before stopping just short of what I wanted. The warmth, the slick glide of it, sent sharp sparks through me, my body reacting instantly, goosebumps rising across my skin despite the heat building beneath it.
Every movement felt amplified, stretched thinner by the way he refused to give more, pulling back just as it began to build, leaving me suspended in that frustrating, aching space between anticipation and release. This felt so different, nothing like my own fingers under my sheets late at night – this was encapsulated full of lust.
“Stay with me doll,” he said softly, but there was something firmer beneath it now. “Don’t let them ruin this.”
Another sound from the wall. My focus wavered from him again.
His grip tightened slightly on me, fingers hovering at my entrance eagerly.
“Hey,” he murmured again, quieter this time, more pointed. “Eyes on me. Now.”
I swallowed, forcing myself to look at him, to meet his gaze properly, even as my body betrayed me, tension coiling low, my mind still split between two rooms, two moments, two completely different feelings. I felt drunk, maybe I was but this was totally unknown.
“That’s better,” he said, almost approving, his thumb brushing lightly, deliberately, like he was testing my reaction, like he was making sure he had it. This made my clamp down tightly on my cherry stained lips, I wish I could draw blood.
Another creak. Another sound. My breath hitched again, and this time he didn’t ignore it. Instead, his expression shifted slightly, something sharper settling in behind his eyes, something more intent.
“You hear that?” he murmured, voice low, almost teasing. “Don’t worry.”
A pause.
Then, softer -
“I’ll give you something better to think about.”
Heat rushed through me, fast and overwhelming, my body reacting before I could stop it, before I could decide how I felt about it. My head thrown back, looking at my boring popcorn ceiling in my dim lit room.
Because part of me wanted that. Wanted to be pulled back, grounded, distracted enough to forget everything else.
But the other part, the quieter, more stubborn part still listened.
Still compared. Still drifted there.
Because even as Geto pulled me closer, even as he tried to claim my attention fully my mind betrayed me. Again. And again. And again.
Back to the room next door. Back to him. Back to the way his hands had felt around my neck - firm, grounding, like he had known exactly where to place them, exactly how much pressure to use without ever needing to ask. Would he be like that here too?
The thought didn’t come gently. It forced itself in, vivid and intrusive, slipping past every attempt I made to stay present. I could see it too clearly - him, not as a memory this time, but as something imagined and real all at once. The dim light of the room catching on his skin, the dark strands of his hair falling loose, damp at the edges, framing a face that always seemed too composed, too controlled until it wasn’t.
I imagined his eyes first. Not soft. Never soft. Heavy. Focused. Watching me the way he always did; like he was reading something I hadn’t said yet, like he could feel everything before I even understood it myself. There was something slower about him in my mind, something more deliberate, like every movement had weight to it, like nothing he did was rushed or careless.
I could picture the way he would move closer, not with urgency, but with intention. The way his hand would come up again, sliding along my neck, fingers spreading just slightly, holding not trapping but making it impossible to forget he was there. The same way he had on the couch. The same way that had left something lingering under my skin long after it should’ve faded.
The worst part was how real it felt. How easy it was to replace everything in front of me with him instead. The room shifted in my mind, blurring at the edges, Geto’s presence becoming something softer, less defined, until all I could see was Choso in his place. The weight of him, the quiet intensity, the way I knew somehow that he wouldn’t need to say much. He never did.
My breath caught, sharper this time, my body reacting before I could pull myself out of it, before I could remind myself that it wasn’t real.
That it wasn’t him. But my mind didn’t care. It kept building it anyway.
I imagined the way he would look at me up closely, how his jaw would tighten just slightly, how his grip might shift not harsher, not careless but firmer, like he was testing something, like he was feeling for every reaction the same way he had before. Like he would notice everything.
And that was it. That was what Geto didn’t have. That quiet awareness. That way of knowing.
Another sound slipped through the wall, softer this time, but enough to drag the image further, to root it deeper, to make it harder to separate what I was hearing from what I was imagining. My chest tightened, heat spreading in a way that didn’t feel entirely like desire anymore - something heavier, something more tangled.
Because I wasn’t just imagining him.
I was wanting him there instead.
The realisation hit hard, my breath stuttering unevenly as it settled in, as it refused to be ignored. What the hell was I doing?
My fingers tightened slightly, grounding myself for a second, trying to pull myself back into the room, back into what was real, what was happening, but it didn’t stick. Because even when I tried to focus even when I forced myself to stay present, he was still there. Right behind my eyes. Clearer than he should’ve been. And no matter how much I tried to push him out; I couldn’t.
“I— I need you… now, please,” the words slipped out of me before I could stop them, uneven and breathless, like they were being dragged up from somewhere deeper than I could reach. I needed something to drown this out, something loud enough, consuming enough, to quiet the thoughts clawing at me from the inside. “Please.”
Because they weren’t stopping.
They kept pushing in, sharper now, louder, tearing through whatever focus I had left. When I listened hard enough, I could hear bodies, slapping and moving. It disgusted me that it turned me on.
Geto’s expression shifted, something darker settling in, something almost pleased.
“Yeah?” he murmured, voice low, edged with something dangerous that curled through me too easily. “Tell me how you want it, doll.”
The way he said it sent a shiver through me, not entirely from anticipation, but from the weight of it, the control, the way he stepped into it so naturally like this was where he thrived.
I dragged in a breath, deeper than I needed, trying to steady myself, trying to force everything else down long enough to stay here, to stay present. My hands moved quickly, almost impatiently, pulling away the last barriers between us, like speed might make it easier, like if I didn’t stop to think, I wouldn’t feel it so much. My bra and top were thrown away revealing my all to him, I saw how his eyes traced finely over me.
“Just- don’t stop,” I said, quieter this time, more urgent, the words catching slightly. “Please.”
It sounded wrong, too desperate. Like I was asking for something that wasn’t really his to give. For a second, it almost felt like I wanted him.
Almost. But then a sound slipped through the wall again.
Softer this time but clearer. And it hit me so much harder.
My body went tense, something sharp twisting low in my chest before I could stop it, something hotter than embarrassment, harsher than discomfort. The reality of it settled in all over again, heavier, suffocating. I could hear her.
That bitch next door.
The thought came fast, unfiltered, slipping through before I could soften it, before I could pretend I didn’t care. I did care. More than I should. My jaw tightened, breath catching unevenly as the sound carried again, dragging my focus right back to him - back to what I couldn’t see but could picture far too clearly.
And suddenly everything in front of me felt like a reaction. Not a choice. Like I was trying to drown her out. Trying to drown him out. Trying to prove something I didn’t even understand. The thought hit hard, settling deep in my chest, impossible to ignore now. I wasn’t here because I wanted this.
Not fully. Not the way I should.
I was here because I couldn’t stand the idea of him being with someone else. No matter how much I tried to lose myself in it; no matter how much Geto pulled me back, grounded me, made me feel, it still wasn’t enough.
Because the truth sat there, loud and undeniable, echoing over everything else.
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18+… living with your best friends hot older brother is great.. until he becomes a jealous mess…
pairing: choso x roommate fem! reader
- masterlink
-previous chapter
-next chapter
「✦ CHAPTER 6 - Vistors ✦」
The following day stretched on in a dull, colourless haze, the kind that seemed to seep into everything, where the rain fell steadily without urgency and the cold clung to my skin as if it had settled there for good. I had a full day of classes ahead of me, alongside the quiet pressure of unfinished modules and approaching assessments, and although university itself was manageable, there was something endlessly draining about it, something that seemed to pull from me without ever giving anything back. Whether it was my social battery wearing thin or something deeper, something physical and rooted in my bones, it always left me feeling hollowed out by the end of it.
So, I let myself disappear into it.
I buried myself in papers and rubrics, in the structure of deadlines and expectations, letting it consume my focus just enough to quiet the persistent burn of my phone beside me. It buzzed once, then again, and I ignored it each time, refusing to give in to the temptation of looking. I still hadn’t replied. I hadn’t even opened Suguru Geto’s messages again, as if avoiding them might somehow undo the weight they carried. I wasn’t entirely sure what I was afraid of, whether it was him, or Choso, or something far more uncomfortable to admit, something that lived within me instead.
The thought lingered all day, quiet but persistent.
Choso. Geto. Last night.
It returned in fragments, in flashes that refused to settle, circling back no matter how hard I tried to focus on anything else. What had happened with Geto had been something, even if I couldn’t fully name it, even if part of me suspected it only felt that way because I wasn’t used to it. Maybe I had mistaken attention for meaning, or maybe I was just letting myself believe something that had never really been there to begin with. And then there was Choso, who sat far heavier in my mind than I wanted him to, whose presence felt more complicated, more dangerous in a way I didn’t understand.
I didn’t know what I felt for him, if anything at all.
He was attractive, undeniably so, and there was something about him that lingered in a way I couldn’t ignore, something steady and consuming beneath the surface, but that didn’t mean I should let myself fall into it. I couldn’t allow that, not when I could already feel the familiar pull of self-sabotage creeping in, quiet and inevitable. And then there was Yuji, who I cared about more than I was willing to admit out loud. Crossing that line would fracture something I wasn’t ready to lose, and I knew that. I knew I wouldn’t do that to him.
And yet, the restraint only made the wanting worse.
It turned it into something sharper, something quieter and more consuming, something that lingered beneath everything else with an intensity I couldn’t shake. Maybe that was why my thoughts kept circling back to Geto, because he felt easier in comparison, something detached, something that came without expectation or consequence beyond the immediate. Maybe I could let myself fall into that instead, let it swallow the confusion and the uncertainty, let it blur everything into something simpler.
I knew how easily it could go wrong. The chances of it ending badly felt almost guaranteed, and I was aware, painfully so, that I probably wasn’t even his type. But the thought stayed with me anyway, quiet and persistent.
When would I ever get this again?
When would I be wanted like that again?
Maybe that alone was enough.
I remembered what I had told Choso, that I wouldn’t go there, that I wouldn’t cross that line, but the words felt weaker now, less certain than they had been when I said them. He wouldn’t have to know.
And yet the thought of him knowing settled heavily in my chest, stirring something I couldn’t quite explain. Would he be angry, and if he was, would it be directed at me or at Geto, or both? The memory of the way he had touched me surfaced uninvited, the intensity of it, the way it had felt different in a way that was impossible to ignore.
Because it had been different.
Geto’s touch had been confident, deliberate, almost practiced, but Choso’s had lingered in a way that stayed with me long after it was over, something quieter but far more consuming. It was intoxicating in a way I couldn’t explain, and I couldn’t quite decide which of them I wanted more, or if that uncertainty was the very thing pulling me deeper into it.
7:20 PM
@y/n: you sound needy… I didn’t take u for that type
He replied within minutes, like he had been waiting.
7:28 PM
@getosug: only when I want something
@getosug: I was starting to think you didn’t like me
A small smile pulled at my lips before I could stop it.
7:30 PM
@y/n: who said I liked you? :)
7:30 PM
@getosug: my bad… I must’ve confused you the other night. Maybe I messed you up pretty good
7:32 PM
@y/n: yeah… still not ringing any bells…
There was a pause before the next message appeared.
7:33 PM
@getosug: you free tomorrow night? My place. I’ll pick u up?
For a moment, I hesitated, but it didn’t last long enough to matter.
Well.
I had done it.
I didn’t know if I had just made a huge mistake, I wouldn’t be able to undo or if I had made things far more interesting, but something in me had already decided before I had the chance to think it through properly, driven by exhaustion and too much caffeine and something far less rational beneath it.
7:36 PM
@y/n: or u could come here. Everybody won’t be home.
7:36 PM
@getosug: see you then doll x
I hadn’t lied. Yuji would be at work, and Choso had said he was busy, something about dinner plans that meant neither of them would be home. I had overheard enough to know that much, enough to know I would be alone.
I still didn’t fully understand what I was doing.
But I wanted to feel something that wasn’t this dull, endless exhaustion, something that cut through the quiet heaviness of everything else. And if being wanted, even briefly, even carelessly, by Geto was enough to give me that, then maybe that was reason enough to let it happen.
It must have been four hours or so until Geto was meant to arrive, yet time felt strangely uneven, dragging in some moments and slipping too quickly through others, as if it could not decide whether to prolong my anticipation or spare me from it. I had been standing beneath the shower far longer than necessary, letting the water run hot against my skin until the air itself felt thick and suffocating, until even the mirror beyond the glass had disappeared into fog. Somewhere beyond it, I vaguely registered Yuji knocking against the door, his voice muffled into nothing by the steady rush of water and the music that filled the space, distant and indistinct, as though it belonged to another world entirely.
I didn’t rush.
I couldn’t.
There was something almost ritualistic in the way I moved, in the care I took, shaving once and then again, slower the second time, more deliberate, as if missing even the smallest detail would somehow ruin everything before it had even begun. Washing my hair, running my fingers through it repeatedly, letting the conditioner sit longer than necessary, all of it turning into something far more consuming than it needed to be. It felt less like getting ready and more like preparing, like stepping toward something I could not quite name but was already too aware of.
By the time I stepped out, my skin was warm and flushed, my limbs heavier than they should have been, as though the effort of it all had drained something from me. It felt ridiculous, almost, the way my stomach turned, the light, restless flutter of nerves that refused to settle no matter how much I tried to ignore them. Like a schoolgirl, I thought, and the thought alone should have been enough to embarrass me into composure, but it wasn’t.
Because I was going to see him again.
And not just see him.
The implication lingered, unspoken but understood, curling quietly in the back of my mind, impossible to ignore no matter how much I tried to frame it as something casual, something meaningless. It had been a long time since I had let anyone that close, longer still since I had let myself want it, and now that the possibility was there again, it felt unfamiliar in a way that made everything sharper, more intense.
I paused in front of the mirror, water still clinging to my skin, my reflection blurred slightly by the lingering steam, and my gaze lingered longer than it should have. It was instinctive, the way my eyes moved, picking apart details I wished I could change, things I would smooth over, tighten, reshape, colour differently if given the chance. It came easily, too easily, like a habit I had never quite managed to break.
And yet, he had already seen me. But that had been different. That had been blurred by alcohol, softened at the edges by something that dulled both thought and consequence. This time, there would be no distance to hide behind, no haze to soften the reality of it. This time, I would be completely aware.
After I left the bathroom, Yuji slipped in for a quick shower before heading off to work, the routine of it all unfolding as it usually did, familiar and unremarkable in a way that felt almost strange against everything else simmering beneath the surface. Choso was nowhere to be seen, no sign of him anywhere in the apartment, and the absence sat with me in a way I didn’t entirely expect, quiet but noticeable.
I found myself in the kitchen soon after, my hair still damp, the ends of it soaking slowly into the fabric of my shirt as I stood there without any real purpose, my attention drifting instead. My gaze settled on a cupboard I had never really paid much attention to before, one I had never felt the need to open, and yet now, for some reason, I did.
Alcohol.
More than I expected.
Some of it was clearly Yuji’s, scattered and inconsistent, but most of it belonged to Choso, though I knew he didn’t drink like he used to. Yuji had mentioned it before, casually, like it wasn’t something that carried any real weight, that there had been a time where it was constant, where he had rarely been sober, but that phase had passed or at least dulled into something more controlled.
I lingered there longer than I meant to, my fingers brushing lightly against the bottles without quite committing to anything.
It should have been simple.
Take some.
Or don’t.
But it wasn’t.
Because I could already feel the version of myself that would exist either way, could already imagine how the night might unfold depending on the choice I made. If I didn’t, I would be too aware, too stiff, caught in my own thoughts, overthinking every word, every movement, every glance until it became unbearable. And if I did, even just a little, maybe it would take the edge off, loosen something inside me enough to make it easier to exist in the moment instead of analysing it.
The debate should have lasted longer. It didn’t.
Barely two minutes passed before I found myself reaching for it, the decision settling into me with a quiet finality that felt both reckless and inevitable.
Getting ready was something else entirely. Because suddenly, nothing felt right. Everything became a question I couldn’t answer properly, something I turned over repeatedly without ever settling on anything certain. What do I wear, what do I avoid, what says too much and what says nothing at all. The weight of it pressed in quietly, threading itself into the anticipation, until even the simplest choices felt heavier than they should have. I decided on something simple, not screaming anything but enough effort. My hair was done nicely at least, a soft loose curl throughout it with gentle makeup. I preferred wearing small lash extensions, just individual ones for more of a doe look. My lips were rose with a stain, holding deep onto the pieces I chew at – darker and more pronounced.
And beneath all of it, something restless remained. Not quite excitement. Not quite dread. Something caught somewhere in between, where wanting and hesitation blurred into one indistinguishable feeling that refused to let me settle. Hours passed in a way that felt uneven, stretching too long in some moments and slipping too quickly through others, until I found myself circling the same thoughts again, unable to settle, unable to quiet the restless energy building beneath my skin. I moved through my room like I could control something by perfecting it, wiping down the same surfaces twice, then again, straightening things that didn’t need straightening, until everything was spotless in a way that felt almost unnatural, like a space no one truly lived in.
And still, I waited.
He hadn’t texted; not once.
By the time he was fifteen minutes late, the doubt had already begun to creep in, quiet at first, then louder, twisting into something sharper, something harder to ignore. Maybe he wasn’t coming at all. Maybe it had been nothing more than a joke, something careless and fleeting that I had taken too seriously, something that only mattered to me.
I was already beginning to convince myself of it when the sound came.
Two firm knocks against the front door. It cut clean through everything.
My body reacted before my mind could catch up, my heartbeat rising suddenly, sharply, until I could feel it in my throat, each pulse louder than the last, urging me in two directions at once, to turn away, to pretend I hadn’t heard it, or to move forward and open the door knowing exactly what I was stepping into.
It felt like walking into something dangerous.
Like I already knew the outcome and yet chose it anyway.
I opened the door.
Suguru Geto stood there as if he had been carved into the moment itself, composed, effortless, his presence filling the doorway in a way that made the space behind him feel smaller, less important. His expression shifted the second he saw me, that slow, familiar smirk pulling at his lips, something warm briefly but far too knowing to be anything close to innocent.
The way he looked at me made my skin tighten.
Not shy.
Not hesitant.
But damn Hungry.
And I hated how easily my body answered it, how quickly that warmth spread through me, sinking lower, deeper, settling somewhere I couldn’t ignore even if I tried.
“Gonna invite me in,” he said, his voice easy, amused, his gaze flicking past me briefly as if checking for anyone else, “or are we keeping it right here?”
His smirk deepened, dangerous in the way it lingered.
“I don’t mind people watch—”
I grabbed his wrist and pulled him inside before he could finish, shutting the door behind him with more force than necessary, cutting off the thought before it could fully form.
“Not even a hey, how are you?” I muttered, though there was no real bite to it.
He let out a quiet breath that almost resembled a laugh, shrugging off his jacket with an ease that felt deliberate, like he knew exactly what he was doing. He left it by the door on the rack. The white shirt beneath it clung just slightly too close to his frame, outlining everything in a way that made it impossible not to look, my gaze lingering a second longer than it should have before I forced it away.
“I apologise,” he said lightly, though his tone suggested he didn’t mean it at all, “I’m getting ahead of myself.” His eyes flicked back to mine, slow, deliberate. “How’ve you been? Feels like it’s been a while.”
“Yeah… I’m good,” I replied, already turning, gesturing vaguely as I led him further inside, though it was unnecessary. He already knew the layout, had been here before, and he moved like it, unhurried, comfortable.
“How about you?”
“Better now,” he answered without hesitation, his voice quieter this time, closer. “So, Yuji and Choso are out?”
There it was that damn awareness.
“Yeah,” I said, trying to keep my tone even, “they’ll be gone for a while.” I paused briefly, then added, “Do you want a drink or anything?”
“I’ll have whatever you’re having.” Of course he would.
He followed me into the kitchen, not touching, not quite close enough to justify the way I could feel him there, but near enough that it settled under my skin anyway. I reached for the cupboard, the one I hadn’t paid much attention to before today, pulling out a bottle with slightly unsteady hands, more aware of him watching me than I wanted to be.
I poured one drink. Then another and then, almost without thinking, I made mine a little stronger.
“You know,” he said after a moment, his voice smooth, observational, “I’ve been here a few times, but I’ve never seen your room.”
I glanced at him briefly. He was watching me not just casually; not idly.
“You want to see it so badly?” I asked, my tone lighter than I felt.
He took a slow sip, not breaking eye contact.
“Hard to say,” he replied, tilting his head slightly, as if considering it. “You’re pretty closed off. Hardly any posts, don’t say much… I don’t even know what you like.” A faint smirk returned. “You might be hiding something. Maybe you’re a nerd.”
I let out a quiet breath, something almost resembling a laugh.
“So what if I am,” I said, turning slightly toward him, meeting his gaze more directly than before. “I bet that’s one of your fantasies.”
The words slipped out too easily. For a moment, he didn’t respond. His expression shifted, just slightly, something in it sharpening, the amusement fading into something more focused, more interested. More dangerous. I turned away before I could read too much into it, already moving toward my room, the air between us shifting in a way I couldn’t undo. Behind me, I heard the scrape of his stool against the floor, the quiet confirmation that he was following, unhurried, certain. Of course he was.
My room felt different with him in it. Smaller, somehow. More exposed. It wasn’t anything extravagant, nothing carefully curated or impressive, just a reflection of me in fragments, band posters lining one wall, slightly uneven, a few small decorative things scattered across shelves, soft details that made the space feel lived in. There were little hints of things I loved but never spoke about, subtle and easy to overlook, including the small cat-themed pieces tucked here and there, a quiet substitute for something I wasn’t allowed to have.
And now he was standing in the middle of it, taking it in slowly, his presence disrupting the familiarity of it all, turning something safe into something else entirely.
Something that no longer felt entirely mine. And I wasn’t sure if that made me uneasy or if it was exactly what I wanted.
We settled onto my bed with an ease that felt almost deceptive, like something that should have been awkward but wasn’t, his weight shifting the mattress just enough to pull me closer, an inch at most, but enough for me to feel it, enough to make me painfully aware of where we were, of how close he was, of how easily that distance could disappear if either of us chose it to. And neither of us did at least not yet.
We talked.
Small things at first, meaningless things that stretched into something softer, something easier, the kind of conversation that filled space without demanding anything too real yet still carried an undercurrent of something heavier beneath it. Time slipped by quietly, almost unnoticed, until nearly an hour had passed, and somewhere along the way, his tone shifted, dipping into something more playful, more deliberate. He flirted like it was second nature, like he didn’t have to think about it, like it was something he could turn on and off at will.
And the worst part was that it worked. Every time.
Slowly, without quite realising when it happened, I felt myself soften under it, my responses becoming lighter, easier, my guard lowering piece by piece until I was something dangerously close to entirely disarmed. It should have unsettled me more than it did, the way I folded into it, the way I let it happen, but instead there was something else, something warmer, something that made it difficult to pull away. My room, which had always been mine in a way that felt safe and contained, shifted around him, not losing that safety entirely but bending it, reshaping it into something unfamiliar. It still felt like mine, but now it held him too, his presence threading through it, altering it in ways I couldn’t ignore.
It felt good. Too good. And that was the problem.
Because somewhere beneath it all, there was still that quiet, persistent truth, the one I kept trying not to look at directly, the one that told me this wasn’t something meant to last, that whatever this had existed on borrowed time, something fleeting and fragile and destined to collapse under its own weight. Like something cursed from the beginning. Like something that was never meant to work. He drifted around my room eventually, unable to stay still for too long, his attention moving from one thing to another with a quiet curiosity that felt almost intrusive yet not unwelcome. His fingers brushed lightly along the edges of my record player, flipping through albums with slow, deliberate movements before selecting one at random, placing it on with a familiarity that suggested he’d done it a hundred times before. The soft crackle filled the room first, followed by music that settled into the space, low and warm, wrapping around us in something almost intimate. He made a comment about my taste, something teasing, something that should have sounded like mockery but didn’t quite land that way, softened instead by the faint smile that lingered at the corner of his mouth. It should have annoyed me.
It didn’t.
If anything, it made something in my chest tighten in a way I didn’t fully understand.
He moved slowly, unhurried, taking in everything like it mattered, like it was worth noticing, his fingertips grazing over posters, pausing briefly at certain ones, asking questions that felt too specific to be careless. What I liked. Why I liked it. Small things, insignificant things, yet the way he asked made them feel heavier, more important. And even when he spoke the most, filled the space with his voice, there were moments where he didn’t, where he let silence settle, where he gave me room to speak instead.
And he listened. Listened. Not just waiting for his turn to talk, not just filling time, but paying attention in a way that felt rare enough to be dangerous. At some point, my thoughts drifted, uninvited.
Back to Choso. To the way he had looked at me, the things he hadn’t said but somehow still made clear, the quiet tension that seemed to follow him wherever he went. I found myself turning it over again, trying to understand what exactly had felt so off, what had unsettled me so deeply. What was so wrong with Geto? Or maybe what was so wrong with this?
Because sitting here now, watching Geto move so easily through my space, hearing him laugh softly at something I said, feeling the way he looked at me like I was something worth his attention, it all felt… right. Too right.
And that alone was enough to make doubt creep back in. Maybe I was being naive. This could all just be a performance, something carefully constructed, something practiced and perfected to draw people in, to make them feel seen, wanted, understood, only for it to mean nothing at all in the end. The thought settled heavily in my chest, cold and unwelcome, dulling the warmth that had built there moments before. Did he see me as just another girl? Someone easy to read, easy to win over? Someone already halfway there before he even tried? The idea made something in me tighten, something sharp and uncomfortable, like I had been exposed without realising it, like I had already given away too much. And suddenly, despite how close he was, despite how warm the room felt only moments ago - I felt cold.
Everything had felt distant before that moment, muted and uncertain, like I was moving through something I didn’t fully understand, until his hand found my thigh, warm and firm, grounding me in a way nothing else had. The contrast was immediate, almost jarring, the heat of his touch cutting clean through the dull haze I had been sitting in, pulling me back into my body all at once.
And then everything shifted. It happened quickly, but not carelessly.
There was a pause in him at first, something softer beneath the surface, the briefest hesitation as if he was reading me, making sure I was still there with him, that I hadn’t pulled away, that this was something I wanted. His touch lingered just long enough to feel intentional, his gaze searching mine in a way that almost felt gentle.
And then it was gone. Replaced
The change wasn’t abrupt, but it was undeniable, the warmth sharpening into something heavier, something far more consuming, his movements losing that careful restraint and becoming something deeper, something driven. It was like watching him shed one version of himself for another, something darker, something that wanted without hesitation. I felt it in the way he moved me, guiding rather than asking, until I was pressed into the centre of my bed, pillows surrounding me, the space closing in as he followed, settling above me with a presence that felt inescapable. Caging me in. His arms braced on either side of me, close enough that I could feel the heat of him, the weight of his body hovering just there, not quite touching but near enough to make every inch of space between us feel deliberate. My breath caught somewhere in my chest, uneven, my heartbeat rising fast and loud, echoing in my ears like something building toward impact.
And beneath it something deeper stirred. A slow, spreading heat that I couldn’t ignore, something that curled low and tight, responding to him before I had the chance to think it through. Memories flickered uninvited, of the way he had touched me before, the way he had made me feel seen, wanted, chosen in a way that lingered long after it should have.
It made everything sharper. More dangerous. When his lips met mine, it wasn’t soft for long.
There was a moment, just a second, where it hovered between something careful and something more, and then he closed the distance fully, taking control of it in a way that made my breath catch. It was consuming, the kind of kiss that didn’t ask but assumed, deepening without hesitation, his hand tightening slightly where it rested against me, pulling me closer into something I couldn’t pull away from even if I tried.
And I didn’t try.
My body reacted before my mind could catch up, responding to him instinctively, the tension unravelling into something far less controlled, something that made me shift beneath him without meaning to. His grip adjusted, firmer now, anchoring me in place, like he had already learned exactly how I would move, exactly how to keep me there. It was overwhelming. The way he touched me and the way he knew. Every small reaction felt amplified, every shift, every breath, every quiet sound pulled from me without permission, and the more I responded, the more certain he became, like he was feeding off it, like he needed it.
Like he wanted me to lose control.
And the worst part was how easily I was already giving it to him.
His hands moved over me with a slow, deliberate intent, as if he was mapping something out, committing every reaction to memory, every shift of my body under his touch noted and stored somewhere behind those dark, unreadable eyes. There was something unhurried in it, something that made the moment stretch, even as my breath came quicker, uneven, betraying me far too easily. When his fingers caught at the fabric of my clothes, tugging just enough to shift them, to test the space between hesitation and permission, I felt it all at once, that sharp flicker of vulnerability, of being seen too clearly, too entirely. My instinct was immediate, my legs drawing in slightly, a quiet, reflexive attempt to shield myself from the intensity of his gaze.
It didn’t last.
He noticed.
Of course he did.
His hand settled against my leg, firm but not forceful, guiding rather than demanding, his touch warm against my skin as he eased the distance back open, undoing that instinct as if it had never been there to begin with.
“Don’t hide doll,” he murmured, his voice low, almost softened, though there was something beneath it that felt far less gentle. “Let me look at you.”
My breath caught at the sight of this. His gaze dragged over me slowly, unhurried, deliberate in a way that made my chest tighten, made the heat in my cheeks deepen under the weight of it. It wasn’t just looking he was taking me all in.
“You’re stunning,” he added quietly, like it was something obvious, something he didn’t need to convince me of, his hand still resting there, grounding, holding me in place.
I couldn’t answer. Didn’t trust myself to.
His touch shifted again, slower now, trailing, testing, the contrast between light and firm enough to make every movement feel sharper, more pronounced. My body reacted without asking me first, a quiet inhale, a slight shift beneath him, something that only seemed to encourage him further. He noticed everything. Every small response. Every breath. And he used it. How my back arched at his touch.
It was intoxicating, the way he moved, the way he seemed to understand exactly where to press, where to linger, where to push just enough to make my composure slip. It made me wonder, fleetingly, if it was always like this, if it always felt this consuming, this overwhelming, or if it was just him, just the way he knew how to unravel something piece by piece until there was nothing left to hold onto.
I could feel the heat rising in my face, the quiet embarrassment that came with being read so easily, so openly, like there was nothing I could keep from him even if I tried.
“
You’re thinking too much again,” he murmured, almost amused, his fingers still moving in that same slow, deliberate rhythm, never quite letting me settle.
I barely had time to respond before the sound cut through everything. The front door. It was unmistakable. The click, the shift, the faint echo of it opening and closing, followed by something heavier, something immediate, footsteps that didn’t hesitate, that moved with purpose through the apartment.
Not one.
Two.
My entire body went still beneath him, breath catching sharply in my throat, my hand instinctively flying to my mouth as if I could silence the moment itself, my eyes widening as the reality hit all at once. I knew those footsteps. Choso. Followed by clicking of heels. A goddamn woman.
Soft at first, then clearer, her voice threaded with a lightness that made something in my chest drop instantly, heavily, like it had been pulled straight down. The sound of them moving through the apartment, closer now, too close, the distance between us shrinking with every step they took.
My heart was racing again, louder than before, panic settling in sharp and fast, my fingers pressing harder against my lips as if that alone could stop the sound of my breathing, could make this moment disappear entirely. He wasn’t supposed to be here. He wasn’t supposed to hear this. And yet Geto didn’t move. Not away. Not even slightly.
If anything, he stilled in a different way, not tense, not caught off guard, but aware, his expression shifting into something far more dangerous, that familiar smirk returning slowly, deliberately, like he had been waiting for this. Like he knew.
His gaze flicked toward the door for only a second before returning to me, calm, unreadable, untouched by the tension that had completely taken over my body.
“You okay?” he murmured, his voice low, almost too casual, like nothing had changed at all.
I shook my head slightly, barely able to breathe, my eyes still fixed toward the door as the sound of footsteps drew closer, closer, until it felt like they were just outside.
“You need to be quiet,” I whispered, my voice barely there, strained with panic.
But he only watched me.
That same look in his eyes. Dark. Knowing. Unbothered.
And somewhere beneath the fear tightening in my chest something else twisted with it. Because he didn’t look worried. He looked interested. Like this, this exact moment was exactly what he wanted.
The footsteps grew louder, heavier, accompanied by that soft, careless laugh that didn’t belong here, that didn’t belong anywhere near me, and it made something in my chest twist sharply, something bitter and unfamiliar, something I didn’t have time to name. I could hear them moving down the hall.
Closer.
Too close.
My hand stayed pressed over my mouth, my breathing shallow, uneven, my entire body tense beneath him as if stillness alone could make us disappear, could undo the fact that this was happening at all.
“Geto—” I whispered, barely audible, my voice tight with warning, with panic.
But he didn’t stop.
If anything, the shift in him became more noticeable, more deliberate, like the presence just outside the room had flipped something inside him rather than deterred him. His focus didn’t waver, didn’t break, his attention still entirely on me, on the way I reacted, on the way my body betrayed every attempt to stay controlled. He wanted to wreck me, break me and use me – and I would let him.
“You hear that?” he murmured softly, his voice brushing against me like something almost playful, almost cruel.
I nodded slightly, my eyes wide, my pulse erratic, my entire body screaming at me to stop this, to push him away, to do something - But I didn’t. I couldn’t.
Because the sounds outside only grew clearer, the murmur of voices, the soft thud of movement against the walls, the unmistakable presence of Choso just beyond the door, close enough that it made the air feel thinner. And Geto; Geto knew it. I could see it in the way his lips curved, in the way his eyes darkened slightly, something sharper settling there, something that had nothing to do with me and everything to do with who was on the other side of that wall.
“You gonna try stay quiet for me…” he murmured, his voice low, almost a tease, his gaze lifting just enough to meet mine, that smirk pulling at his lips. I could feel his breath against my bud, he was that close to my core. That alone was sending me.
A pause.
“Or not?”
It wasn’t a question, not really. It was like he already knew the answer. Like he could see straight through me, past the panic, past the hesitation, to something deeper, something I didn’t want to admit even to myself.
Because I could hear her laugh again.
I could hear Choso’s voice, low, closer now, just inside his room, just there and something in me snapped but not loudly. Not dramatically. But enough. Fuck it.
Something must’ve clicked for Geto too, a dark glaze covered his eyes as he sent electricity through my body with a firm hard lick. Before his rough hands flew around my hips holding, locking me into place. My hand slipped slightly from my mouth, just for a second, just enough for my control to falter, for something small and breathless to escape before I could stop it, before I could pull it back in. A let out a pent-up cry, a breathy moan high in pitch.
The way I could still see his grin on his face as he planted himself deeply into me, massaging me, caressing me. My hand flew back to my mouth as he started violently sucking on my swollen bulb. Fast and hard. Sending my head back in euphoria. A feeling I’ve never felt but been dying to. I tried to conceal myself, my voice and the way everything he was doing to me was shattering me into a thousand pieces.
It was far from quiet but was it loud enough. Until everything stilled.
For a fraction of a second, the world seemed to hold its breath with me, the sound hanging there, suspended, fragile, irreversible.
I've just uploaded 2 NEW hefty chapters on my Wattpad and ao3 for Cohabiting! - I will be uploading them here eventually!!!
I want to thank all of you for reading, interacting, reblogging my story. I am so thankful for all of you, IT MAKES ME SO HAPPY ARGHHH. I hope you guys enjoy <3
18+… living with your best friends hot older brother is great.. until he becomes a jealous mess…
pairing: choso x roommate fem! reader
- masterlink
「✦ CHAPTER 5 - Soap ✦」
The next day was swallowed whole by rain, devoured by a wet, colourless sky that pressed itself against the city without mercy.The apartment felt smaller for it, wrapped in a soft, oppressive grey that seeped in through the windows and settled over everything like dust. The glass had fogged slightly from the difference in temperature, blurring the world outside into nothing more than smudged shapes and faint movement. It should have felt cosy; the kind of day people romanticise, all blankets and tea and old movies but instead it felt suffocating. The air inside was too warm, too still, as though the walls had drawn a breath and forgotten how to exhale.
I felt trapped in it. Hot and smothered, like the room had shrunk around me overnight.
I still hadn’t left my bedroom. After switching my laundry over and forcing down a small, half-hearted snack, I retreated here as if it were the only place that wouldn’t look at me differently. My mood had strapped me to the mattress, pinned me beneath its weight with something heavier than a hangover. The sheets were twisted around my legs, my hair unbrushed, yesterday’s thoughts clinging stubbornly to me no matter how many times I tried to roll onto the other side of the bed and outrun them.
Nobara had texted me earlier. Short. Blunt. A warning disguised as sisterly care. She told me how I’d feel after a night like that - not just the headache or the nausea, but the emotional aftermath. The chemical drop. The price to pay for having too much fun. She called it inevitable, like gravity. An unavoidable side effect of the drugs. I didn’t reply. Instead, I questioned her quietly inside my own head, turning her words repeatedly as if they might eventually fit. Because it didn’t feel like something new. It didn’t feel like a foreign sadness introduced by a substance.
It felt older than that. Familiar. Like something that had always lived in the corners of me and had simply been dragged into the centre of the room under a harsher light. Loneliness? That word felt too soft. Too simple. It was more like a void. A hollow space just beneath my ribs, shaped like something important that had gone missing. Not freshly carved - no, it had been there for years.
I just hadn’t looked at it properly before. I had been too busy filling it with noise, with achievement, with being agreeable and easy and good. I was a happy kid. Or at least, that’s what we told people. We weren’t picture-perfect, but we had support. We had enough. Enough food, enough laughter, enough stability that I never felt entitled to be unhappy. In our house, nothing was ever big enough to warrant breaking down over. We swept things under rugs instead of speaking them out loud, sealed cracks before anyone could notice them. We were fine. We were always fine. And so I learned to be fine too. I learned to swallow discomfort before it had the chance to inconvenience anyone else. To smile through confusion. To make myself smaller when emotions threatened to spill over. It became second nature; the quiet compliance, the self-containment. If something hurt, I folded it neatly and tucked it away somewhere no one could trip over it. Which is why this feeling unsettled me so much. Because it wasn’t sharp enough to name, and it wasn’t dramatic enough to justify. It was just there, heavier now, illuminated, undeniable. Like the rain outside had pressed it into visibility.
And in the stillness of the grey morning, I was reminded sharply, uncomfortably of a younger version of myself. A smaller girl with scraped knees and too-big school jumpers, standing on the edge of playground games pretending she didn’t care that her name was always called last.
Always an afterthought. Always the extra body needed to make numbers even.
I used to tell myself I preferred it that way. If you were chosen last, at least you were chosen. If you expected nothing, you couldn’t be disappointed. I was the kid who gave out too much, homework answers, lunch snacks, unwavering loyalty - in exchange for scraps of belonging. I learned early how to be useful instead of wanted. How to be dependable instead of cherished. I never quite figured out how to ask for anything back. It felt greedy. It felt dangerous.
Home wasn’t cruel, not exactly. It just wasn’t steady. Emotions came and went like weather fronts, unpredictable and sharp, and I learned to adapt instead of relying. If something broke, we didn’t discuss it; we stepped around it. If something hurt, we swallowed it. Support existed, but only in small, practical doses. Enough to survive. Not enough to lean on. So, I stopped leaning. I stopped expecting anyone to show up consistently. Parents, friends, anyone. It was easier that way. Safer. If you never depended on someone, they couldn’t leave you stranded. And yet beneath all of that, there had always been the quiet, shameful wish to be picked first. To be wanted without having to audition for it. To be chosen loudly and without hesitation. The cruel irony was that when attention did land on me, I panicked. Because being picked meant being seen. Fully. Closely. And being seen meant there was something there to reject.
Sometimes it was easier to fade into the background. To become agreeable and soft-edged. To make myself small enough that no one would look long enough to find fault. Lying in my dim bedroom, listening to rain streak the windows, I realised last night had been the opposite of fading. It had been loud. Visible. Unmistakable. I had been chosen. And the younger version of me, the one still standing at the edge of the playground pretending she didn’t care - didn’t quite know what to do with that. Because being wanted like that came with a cost. With exposure. With vulnerability I had never practiced holding. I tried to convince myself it was purely chemical. These feelings. That it would pass in a few hours. That it had nothing to do with the way his hands had felt, or the way I had let myself be seen in ways I never had before. That it had nothing to do with the other pair of eyes in this apartment quieter, darker, harder to read; and the way I had avoided them since I got home.
I rolled onto my back and stared at the ceiling, watching faint shadows shift with the movement of clouds. My chest felt too tight for someone who had technically gotten everything she’d wanted last night. Attention. Desire. Proof that I could be reckless and chosen and wanted in ways that were impossible to ignore. So why did it feel like something had been misplaced instead? Why did the memory of warmth come with an aftertaste of unease?
Outside my room, I could hear the low murmur of the television from the living area, the occasional sound of movement - a cupboard closing, footsteps crossing the hallway. Life continuing, ordinary and unbothered. The apartment did not feel haunted by what had happened. Only I did. I pressed the heel of my hand into my sternum, as if I could physically soothe the ache there, and let out a slow breath. Maybe Nobara was right. Maybe this was simply the comedown. The price of euphoria is always dullness after. But beneath that logical explanation, something softer and more dangerous whispered that this wasn’t about chemistry at all.
It felt like I had stepped slightly outside the person I had spent years constructing - and now I didn’t know how to step back in. And worse, I wasn’t entirely sure I wanted to.
With that, the ding of my phone woke me from my chains of heavy thoughts. The screen lit up with Yuji asking me if I wanted to watch a movie with him and cracking a joke if I’m even alive in there. Before I could think any harder about it, I agreed to come out - first having a much-needed shower before doing so. While I was in the bathroom, a nice coldness it was, I could hear the microwave and the popping of popcorn. I prayed for him to not burn it – since he tended to put the popcorn in for way too long. Then stinking the apartment out with burnt popcorn smell. However, to my joy as I left the bathroom all I could smell was perfect buttery popcorn. A miracle.
I had no clue what to throw on, something comfy and easy. I had glad I put the clean washing away when I did. I just chose some shorts and baggy graphic tee, probably 2 sizes too large for me, my fingertips would just meet the end of the top. I put some ankle socks on too, for as much as I liked the cold, the cold of the floorboards was a bit much after a hot shower.
“Finally, she arrives! I thought you got washed down the drain!”, Yuji was always the goofy type, the one to make any awkward room better.
“Speaking of the drain, I dibs not clearing all that hair. Between all of us I’m sure it’s Choso’s hair anyways”
“Making us do all the dirty work huh, your hair is the longest” Yuji face palmed himself, leaning further into the couch.
“Yeah, but my hair isn’t jet black… but that ecosystems’ colour is! So, it’s primarily not mine.” I couldn’t help but chuckle a little bit.
These boys were mostly very clean, I mean Choso was. Through the glimpses of his room I’d sometimes get. But apart from that he always has his door shut. Yuji on the other hand, his bedroom was… different to say the least – his age showed by the half-naked women on his walls – some pornstars or models. I wondered if Choso had pictures like that. No, I mean no. No. At least I haven’t seen them. The women on Yuji’s walls were beautiful, all shapes and sizes. I couldn’t even gather his type of women.
Again, the thoughts came, uninvited and persistent, slipping quietly into the spaces I couldn’t seem to guard. I found myself wondering, almost obsessively, what kind of women Choso would choose if he were the type to hang them on his walls. What they would look like, what kind of presence they carried, whether they were soft and warm or sharp and impossible to ignore. I imagined them without meaning to, different versions forming and dissolving in my mind. Long hair, short hair, dark, light, confident, effortless. Women who did not hesitate. Women who did not sit in their own heads like I did, picking apart every glance, every word, every silence. The thought settled uncomfortably beneath my ribs.
Of course he looked at women like that. He had to. He was older, more experienced, the kind of man attention seemed to follow without him ever asking for it. I had seen it before in passing moments, in the way girls lingered near him just a little too long, in the way conversations subtly shifted in his direction. He did not need to try. It came to him easily, naturally, like something he had always known how to hold. And the more I let myself think about it, the smaller I felt in comparison, like I was measuring myself against something I had already lost to. Would I ever be his type. The answer came too quickly, too cleanly. Never.
I sank further into the couch beside Yuji, pulling the fluffy green blanket over my legs as though it could muffle the quiet shift in my mood. The fabric settled around me, soft and familiar, but it did nothing to calm the restlessness under my skin. If anything, it made me more aware of it. The way my thighs pressed together without thinking, the faint heat lingering across my chest, the way my body felt too present, too noticeable to ignore. Yuji continued scrolling through movies, completely absorbed in his search, mumbling half to himself, half to me about how we had apparently watched everything worth watching.
“Popcorn?” he asked, turning toward me with that same easy smile, holding the bowl out. I took a handful, letting out a quiet breath of relief at the smell.
“You didn’t burn it,” I said, almost impressed.
“Growth,” he replied, already turning back to the screen.
The normalcy of it should have grounded me, but it didn’t quite reach where I needed it to. As he kept scrolling, talking over trailers and skipping through options, I reached for my phone, letting the glow of the screen pull my attention somewhere quieter. At first, it was nothing. A few notifications. Some photos from last night that made my stomach twist with second hand embarrassment. Blurry, loud, too much. I scrolled past them quickly, not wanting to linger on anything that might pull me back into it. Then my thumb stopped. Two notifications, too close together to ignore.
5:42pm: @getosug added you as a friend
5:43pm: @getosug sent you a message
For a moment, everything inside me went still. My thoughts slowed, lagging, what I was seeing. I had not expected this. Not even slightly. If anything, I had convinced myself of the opposite. That what happened would stay where it belonged, in the noise of the night, blurred out by everything that made it easier to forget. That he would forget. That I would follow eventually. That would have been easier. Cleaner. But this made it real in a way I was not prepared for. I forced my face to remain neutral, aware of Yuji beside me, aware of how easily he could glance over and notice the shift in my expression.
Inside, though, everything felt tangled. Not quite excitement, not quite dread, but something caught between the two. A part of me wanted to ignore it, to leave the message unopened, to pretend I had not seen it at all. But my thumb had already moved, pulling up his profile before I could stop myself. Photos loaded one after another. Him with friends, at parties, surrounded by people, by girls. Laughter caught mid motion, confidence in every angle. He looked exactly the way I remembered. Effortless. Unbothered. Like the world moved around him without resistance. And then I saw it.
A recent post. From the party. His arm was slung loosely around someone beside him, red cups in their hands, the low glow of coloured lights casting shadows across their faces. I could not tell when it had been taken, before or after or somewhere in between. It did not matter. Because my attention shifted instantly.
To Choso. The image held me there without warning. He stood slightly angled, his shirt shifted just enough to reveal the defined lines of his abdomen, the fabric caught mid movement like the moment had not fully settled. There was nothing intentional about it, nothing posed. Just a glimpse. Accidental. Real. My eyes lingered longer than they should have. I felt it before I could think it. The slow build of heat beneath my skin, creeping up my neck, settling across my cheeks. My breathing changed, shallow and uneven, like my body had forgotten its rhythm. The blanket over my legs suddenly felt too warm, trapping heat I could not ignore. My fingers tightened slightly around my phone, grip firm as if that might ground me, might pull me back into something steady.
I shifted without thinking, pressing my thighs together, trying to contain the strange awareness pooling low in my stomach. It made no sense. None of this did. This was ridiculous. Geto was the one who had reached out. Geto was the one who had turned the night into something overwhelming, something I could still feel lingering in my body. He was the one who had made me aware of myself in ways I had never been before. I told myself that was it. That he had done this. That whatever I was feeling now was just a consequence of that, something temporary, something I could ignore.
And yet my eyes remained fixed on the image.
On him.
On the quiet, unintentional way he existed in that frame, like he did not need to try to be seen. I dragged in a slow breath, forcing myself to look away, but the feeling did not leave. It stayed, low and insistent, threading through my chest in a way that made me uncomfortable.
Geto had messaged me. But it wasn’t him I was thinking about. And that unsettled me more than anything else. Before I could stall any longer, I clicked on his message, almost out of spite, as if ripping the bandage off quickly might dull whatever came next. It could be anything, I told myself. Something casual. Something meaningless. Maybe even something stupid enough to laugh off.
It wasn’t.
@getosugu: so… when can I see you again
My stomach dropped in a way that felt immediate and physical, like I had stepped off something without realising how high I’d been standing.
Heat crept up my neck just as quickly, settling across my cheeks, and I suddenly became hyperaware of the way I was sitting, the way my fingers hovered uselessly over the screen. I wished, instantly, that I hadn’t opened it. The small “seen” beneath the message felt louder than it should have, like a spotlight I hadn’t asked for. And the worst part was I didn’t intend to reply. My phone stayed open in my hand, the message sitting there, waiting. Yuji asked me something about a movie, something about whether I’d seen it before, and I hummed in response, nodding without really hearing him. My attention was split in two, half of me sitting on the couch, the other staring down at what felt less like a message and more like something volatile, something I didn’t quite know how to handle.
Like a grenade resting too comfortably in my palm. The seconds stretched. Too long. Long enough that I knew he’d see it. Long enough that silence itself became an answer. Then another notification appeared.
@getosugu: you weren’t this quiet last time
There it was. My breath caught, shallow and uneven, as something tight coiled low in my chest. I could feel the heat again, creeping under my skin, but this time it came with something sharper, something closer to panic. The words pulled me straight back into the memory of it, of how easy it had been to exist in that version of myself, how different I had felt when I wasn’t thinking this much. Now, every possible response felt wrong. I stared at the screen, unmoving, my fingers hovering but never quite landing. It felt easier, somehow, to disappear completely than to type anything back. Easier to let the silence stretch until it snapped on its own. Because what if this meant nothing to him?
The message did not leave me when I locked my phone, it simply settled somewhere deeper, somewhere inconveniently present, threading itself through my breathing until even the act of sitting still felt deliberate. It lingered beneath my ribs with a quiet insistence, not loud enough to demand attention but far too persistent to ignore, and the more I tried to focus on the television in front of me, the more aware I became of how little of it I was taking in.
Yuji’s voice carried on beside me, easy and bright, filling the room with commentary that should have grounded me, but instead it felt like something I had to reach for, something just out of grasp. I nodded where I was supposed to, hummed in vague agreement when he asked something about actors or plots, but my attention kept slipping, pulled back toward the weight of that message and the version of myself it seemed to expect. The quiet of the apartment made everything feel more deliberate, more exposed, and the thought of replying to him now, sober and fully aware of every word I would have to choose, made my chest tighten in a way that felt closer to avoidance than confusion.
The sound of movement from the hallway pulled me from it before I could sink too far, and something in me reacted before I could reason it away, my posture straightening slightly, my hands stilling against the blanket as if I had been caught mid-thought.
I told myself not to turn, that it would be obvious, that there was no reason to react so sharply, but the awareness of him moved through me too quickly to ignore, and when I finally looked, it felt less like a decision and more like something inevitable.
Choso stood in the doorway, and the first thing I noticed was that the shower had not softened him, that whatever tension he carried had settled rather than washed away.
I hadn’t even heard the shower. His hair was still damp at the ends, dark strands falling loosely against his face and neck, and the shirt he had thrown on hung casually over him in a way that only seemed to emphasise the structure beneath. He looked composed, but not relaxed, like something in him remained tightly held. His eyes found mine without hesitation. It was not a passing glance, not something I could dismiss as accidental, and for a moment that stretched just long enough to matter, I felt it settle over me. Heat rose along my neck before I could stop it, spreading across my cheeks, and I became suddenly aware of everything about myself, the way I was sitting, the way my hands pressed lightly into the blanket, the way my breathing had shifted without permission. His jaw tightened slightly, a small movement that might have gone unnoticed if I had not been watching him so closely, and the fact that I had noticed it made something uneasy turn over in my chest.
“Oi,” Yuji called, breaking through the moment without noticing it had existed at all. “You gonna stand there all serious or what? Come sit. We’re picking something.”
Choso’s gaze lingered for a fraction longer before he looked away, stepping forward with quiet ease. “Move,” he said, his voice low, directed at Yuji more than anything else.
Yuji groaned, dragging himself across the couch with exaggerated reluctance. “You’re so demanding, man.”
“Just move,” Choso repeated, and there was something in the way he said it that made Yuji listen this time.
The space shifted as he sat down between us, the couch dipping slightly under his weight, closing the distance in a way that made the air feel warmer, heavier. I felt it immediately, the quiet presence of him beside me, not overwhelming but impossible to ignore, like something steady that had settled too close. I adjusted slightly, trying to make the space feel normal again, and my leg brushed his. It was brief, barely anything, but my body reacted before I could control it, my breath catching just enough that I noticed it. I held still after that, resisting the instinct to move away because it would make it obvious, and instead I focused forward, fixing my attention on the television as if I had been watching it the entire time.
“Okay,” Yuji said, still scrolling, “this one. We haven’t seen this, right?”
“Mm,” I replied, not trusting my voice enough for anything more.
“You look like you’re somewhere else.” The warmth from beside me spoke.
“I’m here,” I said quickly, forcing a small smile. “Just tired.”
“Yeah, right,” he muttered, unconvinced but not pushing further. I was grateful for that, because the quiet between us, between me and Choso, felt far louder than anything Yuji could have said. I could feel him there without looking, the steady presence of him, the way he hadn’t moved away from the contact, the way the space between us felt thinner than it should have.
And then my phone lit up. The sound cut through everything.
Once.
Then again.
Two sharp ringing dings that pulled me out of whatever fragile composure I had managed to hold together, my hand moving quickly, almost too quickly, reaching for it before I could think.
“Damn,” Yuji laughed, leaning slightly to look. “Y/n, you’re popular tonight.”
“Shut up,” I said, the words coming out faster than I intended, sharper. “No, I’m not, it’s just random notifications.”
“Sure, it is,” he grinned from the other side of the couch, reading in between the lines.
My fingers fumbled slightly as I grabbed my phone, trying to silence it, trying to make it stop before it could draw any more attention. I should have just locked it without looking. I knew that. But I didn’t.
Face ID caught me instantly, unlocking the screen without hesitation, and before I could stop it, the conversation opened.
For a moment, everything slowed around me.
The new message sat there. An image. Geto. In his full bloody glory.
Standing in front of a mirror, his phone raised, his shirt gone, his posture relaxed in a way that felt deliberate. The bathroom lighting carving out the lines of his hard work, he looked like a Greek god in the flesh. The frame cut low enough to suggest more than it showed as his free hand held something low in frame, the composition intentional in a way that made my stomach drop, not from the image itself, but from where I was, from who was beside me. I froze.
My breath caught, sharp and immediate, my chest tightening as awareness hit all at once. Choso was right there. Close enough. Too close.
I didn’t turn my head. I didn’t check. I couldn’t. But I felt it. The daunting possibility that he had seen it all. My thumb moved quickly, almost instinctively, locking the screen, shutting it down before it could linger any longer, before I had to acknowledge it, before I had to face what that moment had just exposed. The phone went dark in my hand. Silence followed, but it wasn’t empty. It was heavy.
Yuji didn’t notice, still focused on the movie, still talking about something I didn’t catch, but beside me, the air felt different, like something had shifted in a way I couldn’t undo. I kept my eyes locked forward, my posture still, my breathing carefully measured, as if I could control the situation by controlling myself. But I couldn’t ignore it. The awareness. The tension. And the quiet, unsettling thought that whatever had just happened, however small it seemed, had not gone unnoticed. Not by him.
The movie carried on around us, scene bleeding into scene without much meaning to me, the flickering light from the screen washing over us in soft blues and greys that only made the room feel smaller, more enclosed. Somehow time moved anyway, even though I wasn’t present enough to track it, wasn’t grounded enough to feel it pass. My phone lay dead in my hand, the screen black, useless now, cutting me off from whatever waited on the other side of it, but not from the weight of what had already been seen. Yuji was completely absorbed, leaning forward at times, laughing under his breath, reacting to moments I barely registered. His energy filled the room in a way that should have made everything feel normal, like this was just another night, another movie, another easy stretch of time shared between us. But it didn’t reach me. I sat there, wrapped in the blanket that now felt too warm, too suffocating, counting the seconds without knowing how many had passed, waiting for a moment that would let me leave without it being obvious. I just wanted to go back to my room. To shut the door. To think without being watched. Because sitting here, like this, beside him, with everything unspoken but somehow louder than anything said, felt unbearable in a quiet, creeping way.
Then I felt it. Movement. Subtle at first, but close enough that my body picked up on it instantly, every nerve sharpening without permission. Choso shifted beside me, not dramatically, not in a way that would draw attention, but enough that the space between us changed again, tightening in a way that made my breath catch before I could stop it. His arm lifted slowly and utterly deliberately. Resting along the back of the couch behind me, yet not touching me but close enough that it felt like it was. The air changed with it. I could feel the presence of him more than before, the quiet weight of his arm behind me, the subtle heat of him bleeding into the space I occupied. Maybe I could even smell him, faint hints of his musky shower gel. It wasn’t obvious, not to anyone looking, but to me it felt like everything had shifted, like I had been pulled into something I hadn’t agreed to but couldn’t step out of. My breath hitched, small and sharp, caught in my throat as I tried to steady it, tried to act like nothing had changed, like I hadn’t noticed. But I had, I noticed everything. The way my body had gone still, the way my hands tightened slightly into the blanket, the way my heartbeat had picked up, loud and uneven, echoing in my chest. It felt like he wanted to say something. And then he did.
“I hope you’re not dumb… like those other girls that talk to him.” His voice was low, barely above a breath, the words slipping out just close enough to me that I felt them before I fully processed them.
It was quiet enough that Yuji wouldn’t hear, buried beneath the sound of the movie, but it landed heavily, direct and unavoidable. And it was the closeness that got to me. Not just what he said, but how he said it right there, beside me. His voice low, controlled, threaded with something I couldn’t immediately place, something that made my stomach tighten and my chest feel too small all at once. For a second, I didn’t move. I couldn’t. My body froze completely, every thought colliding at once, the meaning of his words settling in slowly but heavily. He had seen. Not maybe. Not possibly. He had seen.
My grip on the blanket tightened, fingers curling into the fabric as heat rushed up my neck again, sharper this time, more suffocating, my breath shallow as I tried to steady it, tried to act like the ground beneath me hadn’t just shifted. What the fuck. Was he calling me dumb? The thought hit hard, immediate, defensive, something to hold onto instead of the other things creeping in behind it. My chest tightened, a mix of embarrassment and irritation sparking quickly, giving me something solid to stand on, something easier than whatever else was tangled underneath. I turned my head slightly, just enough to look at him. Not fully, not obviously but enough.
“What?” I said quietly, my voice low but tight, controlled in a way that didn’t quite hide the edge beneath it. He didn’t look at me straight away.
His gaze stayed forward, fixed on the screen like nothing had happened, like he hadn’t just dropped something between us that felt heavier than the entire room. His jaw was set again, that same tension sitting there, controlled but present, and for a moment it felt like he might not answer at all. Then, just slightly, his eyes shifted.
“You heard me,” he said, just as quietly.
The words settled in again, heavier this time, not just sharp but deliberate and something underneath the irritation shifted. Because it didn’t sound like an insult at least not entirely. There was something else in it, something tighter, something restrained. Something that didn’t quite sit right with the idea of him just judging me.
My breath caught again, softer this time, less sharp, more uncertain, and I became painfully aware of how close he still was, of the arm behind me, of the way the space between us hadn’t changed.
“I can do what I want, I know what I’m doing” I muttered, the words coming out quieter than I intended, lacking the bite I had meant to give them.
It sounded weak even to me and that only made the heat in my chest worse. He let out a small breath through his nose, not quite a laugh, not quite anything at all, but enough to shift something in the air again.
“Yeah,” he said, low, almost under his breath, “that’s the problem. You don’t.”
My stomach dropped at that not just because of the words themselves but because of the way he said them. Like he meant something more. Like this wasn’t just about what he saw on my phone. Like it had nothing to do with Geto at all. I swallowed, my throat suddenly dry, my eyes flicking back to the television as if that would help, as if I could just disappear back into the movie and pretend this wasn’t happening. But I couldn’t. I could still feel him there. Close. Too close.
And whatever this was between us, whatever had shifted, it wasn’t going away. Not now. I was too deep in thinking of a reply, something witty and punchy maybe. Instead, I felt his movements again, maybe to retreat? Maybe to move away? Definitely not.
His warm hand moved my hair delicately away from my neck, brushing it softly out of the way. Then his hand slid to the back of my neck, firm and steady, fingers spreading just enough to hold me there, his thumb resting higher, anchoring me in place without needing force. It wasn’t rough, but it wasn’t gentle either, or that was what made it worse, the quiet certainty of it, the way he didn’t hesitate. My breath hitched, sharp and uncontrolled. Immediately, I knew he felt it. My pulse jumped hard beneath his hand, racing in a way I couldn’t slow, couldn’t hide, and the realisation hit just as quickly; he wasn’t just touching me. He was reading me. His grip tightened slightly. Then eased like he was testing something.
“You really gonna sit here and lie to me?” he said, his voice low, closer now, steady in a way that made my chest tighten.
“I’m not lying,” I whispered, but the words came out uneven, thinner than I wanted, betraying me instantly.
His thumb pressed just a fraction more into my skin, not enough to hurt yet enough to make me feel it.
“Don’t,” he said quietly. The single word landed heavier than anything else. My stomach twisted.
“Don’t what?” I muttered, trying to keep my voice steady, trying to desperately hold onto something defensive, something solid anchoring me down.
“Don’t act like I didn’t see it,” he replied, his tone calm but firmer now, less room for argument in it. “And don’t act like it’s a good idea.”
My pulse spiked again beneath his hand, faster this time, and I felt the way his fingers adjusted, tightening just enough to acknowledge it. I hated that. I hated how easily he could tell.
“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” I said, but it sounded weak, even to me, lacking the bite I had meant to give it. A quiet breath left him, something almost like disbelief.
“I know exactly what I’m talking about,” he said, his voice dropping slightly, closer to my ear now. “You just don’t want to hear it.”
My fingers curled tighter into the blanket, grounding myself against something as my body stayed completely still under his hand. “I can do what I want,” I said, softer now, the words coming out more like something I was trying to convince myself of than him. His grip tightened again. This time more noticeable.
“Yeah,” he murmured. “You keep saying that.” The way he said it made my chest tighten.
“Because it’s true,” I pushed, but it came out quieter, less certain. He leaned in slightly. Not enough for anyone else to notice. More than enough for me.
“Then why are you shaking?” he said under his breath. My breath caught immediately, my body going even more still, as if that would somehow prove him wrong, as if freezing could hide the way my pulse was racing under his hand, the way my chest rose just a little too quickly.
“I’m not,” I muttered. His thumb pressed again.
“Don’t do that,” he said, softer now, but firmer. “Don’t lie when I can feel it.” The words hit deeper than they should have. Because he could. He was. Every reaction, every shift, every breath I couldn’t control was right there under his hand, and he was using it, reading me in a way that made it impossible to hide behind anything.
“You think that means something?” I tried, grasping at something, anything, to push back, but even I could hear how it fell flat.
“I know it does,” he replied. No hesitation. No doubt. My throat felt tight.
“Why do you even care?” I asked again, quieter now, but the question felt heavier this time, more real.
There was a pause.
His grip didn’t loosen.
If anything, it steadied.
“Because you don’t get it,” he said finally, his voice low, controlled, but there was something underneath it now, something sharper. “Him, that night… that’s what he does. Every weekend with another new girl.”
My chest tightened. “That’s not your problem,” I said, but it lacked force now, softer, slipping. It ached in my chest, deep down I knew how it was.
“It is when you’re the one dealing with it after,” he said.
The words landed differently, they weren’t loud, not even angry. Just… certain.
I swallowed, my breath uneven again, my body still too aware of his hand, of the way it hadn’t moved, hadn’t let me forget for even a second that he was there, that he was holding me in place just enough to keep me from slipping away from the moment.
“I’m fine,” I said again, quieter now, almost stubborn. His thumb pressed once more, slow.
“Say you’ll stop it before you get hurt” he murmured.
My breath faltered.
For a second.
I couldn’t.
His hand didn’t move. If anything, it became more deliberate, more grounded, like he had settled into the decision to keep it there, to hold me in place just enough that I couldn’t escape what he was asking. His fingers stayed firm at the back of my neck, his thumb resting higher, pressing lightly, almost thoughtfully, but it was enough to keep me aware of him in every possible way.
“Say it,” he murmured again, quieter this time, but there was something more in it now, something that felt less like a suggestion and more like something he needed to hear.
I swallowed, my throat tight, my breath uneven as I finally turned my head properly toward him. And this time I didn’t look away. I couldn’t help but leave my mouth ajar before clamping my lips down in-between my teeth – maybe some pain will knock me out of this dream. His eyes were already scanning me, dark and steady, not wavering, not softening, just waiting. There was something unreadable in them, something held back but present enough that I felt it settle somewhere deep in my chest. The space between us felt impossibly small now, like the rest of the room had fallen away entirely, like it was just this moment, just this distance, just him. My pulse jumped hard beneath his hand the second our eyes locked. I knew he felt it. I could see it in the way his grip shifted slightly, tightening just enough to acknowledge it, to confirm what he already knew. The pressure wasn’t harsh, but it was intentional, his thumb pressing just a fraction more firmly as if he was testing the rhythm of it, feeling how fast it raced, how little control I had over it. It made my breath catch. Again. I hated how obvious it felt. Hated how my body betrayed me so easily under his touch, how every reaction seemed louder, sharper, impossible to hide when he was this close, when his hand was right there, reading everything I couldn’t say. I felt torn between them.
“You’re not going to say it, will you?” he said quietly, but this time there was something else beneath it, something closer to certainty, like he had already decided my answer for me.
“I…” I started, but the word faltered, caught somewhere between resistance and something else I didn’t want to name. His thumb pressed again. Slow and deliberate.
“Don’t lie,” he said, softer now, but firmer in a way that made my chest tighten.
“I’m not—” I tried, but even I could hear how weak it sounded. His gaze didn’t move and didn’t soften. If anything, it held me there more firmly than his hand did.
“Then say it,” he murmured. The words settled between us, heavy and waiting, and I felt it then, not just the pressure of his hand, but the weight of his attention, the way he was watching me, not just looking, but seeing, picking apart every reaction I couldn’t control. My pulse raced harder beneath his fingers. My breath came quicker. My body stayed still, but everything inside me felt anything but. And I knew he could feel all of it. I swallowed again, my lips parting slightly before I pressed them together, trying to steady myself, trying to hold onto something that felt like control.
“I will,” I said finally. The words came out quieter than I intended, softer, but they were there. Real. And the second they left me, something shifted in his grip as it tightened just slightly. Not in anger. In acknowledgment. His eyes didn’t leave mine, not even for a second, and I could feel the way his hand adjusted again, the subtle pressure of it grounding and unsettling all at once, like he was holding onto the moment, holding onto me just long enough to make sure I meant it.
“Say it properly,” he murmured.
My chest tightened at that, something flickering in my stomach deep within my core, something dangerously close to frustration, but it didn’t come out that way.
It came out softer. “I won’t… get hurt, I won’t let myself get hurt” I said, my voice steadier this time, but quieter, like the words belonged to him more than they did to me. A pause. His eyes searched mine, slower now, more deliberate, like he was checking, like he was measuring the truth of it against everything else he could feel beneath his hand. My pulse was still racing. My breathing still uneven. My body still reacting in ways I couldn’t control. And he knew. He could feel it. He could see it – straight through me. The corner of his jaw tightened slightly, something unreadable flickering across his expression, but he didn’t call it out, didn’t push further. Instead, his grip eased, just a fraction but not fully letting go.
“Good,” he said quietly. The word settled low in my chest, heavier than it should have been, and for a second neither of us moved, neither of us looked away. And even as his hand finally began to loosen from the back of my neck - I could still feel it there.
The warmth receding away, left me wanting more.
Later that night, the house folded in on itself, doors closing one by one until the noise of the evening was sealed away behind thin walls and dim light.
Silence settled where laughter had been, but it did not reach him. Choso laid in the dark with his eyes open, something restless lodged beneath his ribs that refused to quiet, no matter how still he forced his body to be. He could still see it. The brief, cutting flash of your phone lighting up, the image that followed, the way your expression had shifted before you hid it away too quickly. It had lasted a second. That was all it took. The thought of it sat wrong in him, heavy and unrelenting, twisting into something he didn’t care to name, something that felt too close to anger, too close to something sharper. He turned slightly onto his side, jaw tightening as the memory replayed again, slower this time, more deliberate. Geto’s confidence. The ease of it. The assumption that he could reach for you and be answered. His hand shifted against the sheets. Stilled.
Then moved again. His gaze flickered, unseeing at first, toward the bedside drawer.
Closed. Quiet. But not empty.
He didn’t move for a long moment, the tension in his chest tightening instead of easing, like the decision was already made somewhere deeper than thought. His fingers curled slightly against the mattress before he pushed himself up just enough, the movement slow, reluctant in a way that suggested resistance rather than intent.
The drawer slid open with a soft, almost careful sound. For a second, he didn’t touch it. Just admired. Like that alone was enough to cross a line. Then his hand moved, deliberate now and damn certain. He picked it up, the fabric light in his grasp, far softer than it had any right to be, and for a moment, he simply held it there, his fingers tightening slightly as if testing its reality, as if grounding something that had felt too abstract until now.
His jaw clenched. Because it wasn’t just the object. It was you. The quiet, unguarded pieces of you that he had no right to hold, no right to keep, and yet hadn’t put back. His thumb brushed against it once, absent-minded, before his hand stilled again, his grip tightening just slightly. The thought of you didn’t come gently. It came with everything else. The way you had looked at him. The way your pulse had raced beneath his hand. The way your body had reacted without permission. And then the reminder that you had still chosen someone else caused his grip to tighten.
Something in his chest twisted, sharp and unfamiliar, something he didn’t want to sit with, didn’t want to name, but couldn’t quite ignore either. He exhaled slowly, the sound quiet in the still room, before closing his hand around it fully, like that might contain something that had already spread too far.
18+… living with your best friends hot older brother is great.. until he becomes a jealous mess…
pairing: choso x roommate fem! reader
- masterlink
「 ✦ CHAPTER 4 - Lingering ✦ 」
My bedroom smells like stale perfume and sleep, like something that shouldn’t have followed me home but did anyway. The air feels thick and unmoving, frozen in the shape I left it in yesterday. I’m still curled on top of the covers instead of beneath them, fully dressed, as if I collapsed before I could decide who I was supposed to be this morning. The fabric clings awkwardly to my skin, wrinkled and faintly damp, carrying traces of chlorine and smoke and something warmer that makes my stomach twist when I let myself think about it. My head throbs steadily, a dull pulse behind my eyes that feels earned. Even my beneath my eyebrow aches like it remembers the bass from last night and refuses to forgive me for it.
Sunlight filters through the blinds in long, golden stripes, stretching across my walls and over my legs. It paints everything in a softness that feels undeserved. Dust floats lazily in the beams, peaceful and undisturbed. My desk is still cluttered with unfinished assignments. My shoes are still kicked off near the door. Nothing in this room looks different. Nothing announces what happened. But I feel different.
I roll onto my back and stare at the ceiling, my mouth dry, my body heavy. The hangover presses down on me, but it isn’t what’s keeping me awake.
Every time I close my eyes, I feel it again - the weight of his hands at my waist, the firmness in his grip, the way he held me like he was certain I wouldn’t pull away. The memory is too clear, too immediate. It isn’t fading the way it should.
I wanted it. That’s the part that won’t let me rest. It would be easier if I could blame the alcohol. Easier if I could tell myself I was swept up in the music, in the steam, in the recklessness of it all. But when I replay it honestly, I know the truth. I leaned into him. I didn’t hesitate. I didn’t ask him to stop.
The regret doesn’t come in sharp waves. It seeps in slowly, settling somewhere beneath my ribs. Not because I think what happened was dirty or shameful, but because it wasn’t meaningless. It wasn’t random. And that makes it harder to tuck away. There was no confusion in it. No hesitation. Just want. And maybe that’s why it felt so intoxicating.
Choso’s name slips into my mind uninvited, and my chest tightens.
Geto isn’t some stranger from a party I’ll never see again. He’s woven into my normal. He’s been in our kitchen late at night, leaning against the counter while Choso complains about work. He’s sat on our couch, laughing too loudly at something stupid. He’s been there in the background of my life for months, close enough to feel familiar.
And so has Choso.
That thought lands heavier. I’ve always told myself whatever I feel when Choso smiles at me is just comfort. Just proximity. Just the ease of living side by side. It’s easy to mistake warmth for something deeper when you see someone every day. I’ve repeated that to myself enough times that I almost believe it. But this morning, lying here with the memory of his best friend’s hands still ghosting over my skin, I’m not so sure. When I think about Choso, it isn’t heat that fills my chest. It’s something quieter. The way he leaves the hallway light on if I’m out late. The way he asks if I’ve eaten without making it obvious he’s checking. The way his eyes linger sometimes, like he’s debating whether to say something more and decides against it. There’s a line there. There has always been a line.
And last night, I stepped over one with someone else.
I turn onto my side and pull my knees closer to my chest. My skin feels hyperaware, as if it learned something it can’t unlearn. Even the brush of fabric against my thigh makes me inhale too sharply.
The room is still soft with morning light, still ordinary, still forgiving. I don’t feel forgiven. Not because I owe anyone anything. Not because I promised something I didn’t keep. But because part of me wonders if I acted out of frustration. Out of wanting to feel chosen in a way that was obvious and immediate, instead of slow and uncertain. Geto chose me last night. There was no doubt in that. But the thought of facing Choso today makes my stomach twist in a way the hangover never could.
I press my forehead into the mattress and let out a slow breath. “What did you do?” I murmur, and this time it isn’t curiosity in my voice. It’s something softer. Something almost fragile. I don’t know if I crossed a line with Geto. Or if I crossed one with myself. And I have a feeling I won’t be able to ignore it for long.
As much as I wanted to stay exactly where I was - curled into my sheets, curtains half-drawn, letting the world continue without me; the state of my room suggested otherwise. My laptop sat open on the desk like an accusation. Unread emails stacked in quiet judgment. Half-finished university assignments blinked back at me from the screen, waiting to be revised, submitted, made into something respectable. The sensible part of me knew I should start there. Instead, I did what I always do. I chose the easier task.
My gaze drifted toward the laundry basket by my door, overflowing and slightly damp, fabric slumped over the rim like it had given up entirely. The faint scent of chlorine and something warmer lingered in the air around it. Every piece of clothing inside felt heavy with memory, the pool water, the steam, the heat of hands I hadn’t stopped thinking about since. The idea of doing laundry felt almost domestic. Neutral. Mechanical. Something that didn’t require emotional processing. But stepping outside my room did. The hallway beyond my door suddenly felt like contested territory. Yuji could be in the kitchen. Choso could be anywhere. The thought of running into either of them made something tight and unfamiliar coil low in my stomach. It wasn’t fear exactly -not danger but exposure. Like they could see it on me. Like last night had left a visible mark no amount of soap could wash away. Especially him. Especially Choso. I didn’t know why that thought unsettled me more than the rest.
I exhaled slowly and swung my legs off the bed. Avoidance wasn’t going to dissolve reality. The house wasn’t going to rearrange itself around my discomfort. I could either rot in here all day or act like nothing had happened. I chose the second option, even if my hands trembled slightly when I grabbed the basket. It rested awkwardly against my hip as I opened my bedroom door, stepping into the hallway with more resolve than I felt.
The air outside my room was cooler. Quieter. I paused for half a second, listening. Nothing. No voices. No footsteps. No movement from the kitchen. The coast was clear. I moved quickly, almost guiltily, like I was sneaking rather than simply existing in a space I paid rent for. The bathroom door creaked softly when I pushed it open. I didn’t look in the mirror this time. I didn’t want to check if I still looked like someone who had made reckless choices. I knelt and began transferring clothes into the washing machine, piece by piece. Denim thudded heavily against the drum. Fabric clung faintly to itself before separating with a quiet, wet pull. Bending made my headache surge again, a dull throb blooming behind my left eyebrow, nausea curling faintly at the edges of my stomach. I swallowed and kept moving. It felt important to finish quickly. To leave no trace of myself lingering here. When the machine finally roared to life, filling with water and beginning its slow rotation, I felt an absurd sense of accomplishment. One task done. One thing handled.
As soon as I stood, though, the vulnerability returned. The hallway waited outside the door like a test I hadn’t studied for. I picked up the now-empty basket and stepped back out, moving faster this time. My body felt slightly disconnected; hungover, heavy, tender in places I refused to name. With my free hand, I rubbed at my eyes, smearing sleep and headache and everything else together into something manageable. I didn’t look toward Choso’s room. I didn’t want to risk seeing the door open. I reached mine quickly and slipped inside, shutting it with quiet finality. The click of the latch felt like relief. I leaned back against the door for a moment, exhaling. Laundry done. Now came the harder tasks - the emails, the assignments, the pretending. The part where I had to sit still long enough for my thoughts to catch up with me.
*
Choso Kamo POV:
A night like that never grants mercy, and Choso had known that before he even closed his eyes, because the silence of his room had felt too loud, too observant, as if the walls themselves had witnessed something he refused to name.
He had gone to bed early, earlier than usual, disciplined in the way he always was, folding himself into routine as though routine could cauterise what he had seen; the easy curve of her laughter, the looseness in her shoulders, the way Geto had stood too close, and she had not stepped away. He had stared at the ceiling for hours, the dark pressing down on him, every time he drifted toward sleep something dragging him back up by the throat. By the time the grey of early morning slipped through the curtains, he was already awake, already exhausted in a way that did not come from lack of rest but from thinking too much about things that were none of his business.
He doesn’t lie in discomfort. He needed to burn it out.
He dressed without hesitation, pulling on black athletic shorts and an oversized grey jumper that hung heavy on his broad frame, the cotton clinging slightly to skin still warm from a restless night. He avoided the mirror entirely. He did not want to look at the expression he knew would be there – that same tightness around the eyes, that tension in his jaw that made him look harsher than he meant to be. The house was still quiet when he stepped out, the air with faint remnants of the night before lingering like an accusation.
The cold outside hit him sharply, the winter air slicing into his lungs on the first inhale, and he welcomed the sting as something clean and uncomplicated. A pain that felt great compared to what he was feeling. He ran hard from the beginning, shoes striking pavement in a steady, punishing rhythm, his breath leaving him in visible bursts that dissolved behind him. The cold burned down his throat, mixing with the raw scrape left behind from cigarettes he had smoked too quickly the night before, each drag taken not out of habit but out of a need to fill the silence in his head. He pushed himself faster than necessary, thighs tightening, calves straining, jumper dampening at the spine where sweat began to gather despite the low temperature.
The discomfort grounded him. The ache in his muscles was something he understood, something that obeyed logic: run hard enough and you will hurt; hurt enough and you will stop thinking. Except he didn’t stop thinking. Images crept in anyway, uninvited and unwelcome. The way she had thrown her head back when she laughed. The way Geto had looked at her with that infuriating ease, that slow hunger Choso had noticed immediately and pretended not to. He told himself it was protectiveness, that he simply did not trust men who watched women like that. He told himself it was concern. He did not let the word jealousy surface fully, though it hovered somewhere beneath his ribs, sharp and humiliating.
By the time he turned back toward the house, his breathing was heavy, sweat cooling unpleasantly against his skin, his pulse loud in his ears. He felt wrung out but not yet relieved. Inside, the house greeted him with quiet domesticity. The washing machine hummed faintly from the bathroom, a low mechanical churn that seemed almost peaceful. The hallway was lit softly by late morning light filtering through the windows, dust motes suspended in the air, everything deceptively calm. He suspected Y/n was still in bed with a killer of a headache.
He walked down the hall, dragging a hand through his damp hair, and that was when he saw it.
The black stood out immediately, a contrast, almost violent against the pale floorboards.
It lay twisted near the wall as if it had slipped from somewhere careless and been forgotten mid-motion. He slowed without meaning to, the rhythm of his breathing faltering, his body going uncharacteristically still as recognition settled in.
A thong. Small. Delicate. Black. Laced.
His stomach tightened in a way that felt disproportionate to the object itself, because it was not the fabric that unsettled him but what it implied, what it suggested, what it reminded him of. The hallway felt narrower suddenly, the air heavier. He was acutely aware of the sweat drying on his skin, of the rise and fall of his chest beneath the jumper, of the fact that he was standing there staring at something so intimate it felt like trespassing. It was clearly yours. There was no mistaking that.
His jaw flexed as his mind betrayed him instantly, conjuring images he had no right to entertain - black against your skin, black chosen deliberately, black seen by someone else before it ever touched the hallway floor. He swallowed hard, anger rising before he could identify its source. Anger at carelessness. Anger at Geto. Anger at himself for reacting at all. He stepped closer, almost against his will, each movement slow and deliberate as though approaching something fragile. The fabric looked impossibly small in the quiet space, harmless and yet charged with something that made his pulse pick up again.
The front door clicked open. Yuji’s voice carried in easily, casual and bright, cutting through the stillness. Choso reacted without thinking. He bent swiftly, scooping the black fabric into his hand, fingers closing around it with more force than necessary, instinctively balling it into his fist and pushing his arm behind his back as though concealing contraband. His heart thudded hard against his ribs, not from exertion this time but from something far more unsettling. Yuji rounded the corner, taking in the sight of him - flushed skin, damp hair, chest still rising heavier than usual beneath the grey cotton.
“You just get back?” Yuji asked, eyes narrowing slightly. “You look wrecked.”
“I ran,” Choso replied evenly, forcing his breathing to steady, forcing his posture to relax.
Yuji studied him for a second longer, suspicious but distracted, then shrugged and headed toward the kitchen, already talking about something else entirely. The normalcy of it felt almost absurd.
When Yuji disappeared, Choso allowed himself to exhale slowly, bringing his hand forward. The thong unfurled slightly from his clenched fist, creased and damp from the sweat of his palm. He stared at it in silence, something heavy and unnameable settling deeper in his chest.
He told himself he had picked it up to spare you embarrassment, to prevent Yuji’s teasing, to keep something private from becoming spectacle. He clung to that explanation firmly, because the alternative - that he had not wanted anyone else to see it, that the thought of Yuji noticing it had ignited something territorial and irrational inside him. Was far harder to confront. His gaze drifted toward your bedroom door at the end of the hall, still closed. He imagined knocking, imagined holding it out to you with that same stoic expression he wore for everything else, imagined the brief flicker in your eyes when you realised what he had in his hand. The thought made his throat tighten unexpectedly. He had no claim. No right to feel as though something had shifted in the house overnight.
And yet, standing there in the quiet hallway with the black fabric resting in his palm and his body still humming faintly from exertion and something far more dangerous, he felt as though he had lost something unnamed; something he had never admitted to wanting, and therefore never allowed himself to protect. He shouldn’t still be holding it. That was the first thought that struck him as he stood alone in the hallway, Yuji’s voice drifting faintly from the kitchen, the black lace slack against his palm like something alive. It was absurd how something so small could feel so heavy, how the fabric seemed to burn against his skin as though it carried a temperature of its own. He told himself again that he had only picked it up to spare you the humiliation, that he had reacted on instinct, that there was nothing beneath that instinct worth examining.
And yet he had not put it back down. His thumb dragged unconsciously over the delicate edge of the lace, feeling the thin stretch of it, the softness that contrasted sharply with the tension wound tight through his body. His heart was still beating too fast from the run, or at least that was the excuse he offered himself as he turned toward his room, steps measured, jaw locked. The hallway felt longer on the walk back, quieter, like it was holding its breath with him. Inside his room, he shut the door with more care than necessary. The space was dim, curtains half-drawn, the air faintly cool against the lingering heat of his skin.
He stood there for a moment, unmoving, staring down at his closed fist before slowly unfurling his fingers. The lace fell open in his palm again, wrinkled now from where he had clenched it too tightly. It looked different here, more intimate somehow, removed from the accidental innocence of the hallway floor and placed squarely within his private space. He exhaled slowly through his nose. This was ridiculous. He should walk down the hall, knock on your door, hand it over without expression, and end whatever this was before it became something worse. That would be the decent thing to do. The normal thing. Instead, he sat on the edge of his bed. The mattress dipped under his weight, his damp jumper clinging faintly to his back, sweat cooling against his spine as the silence thickened around him. His fingers moved again without permission, tracing the curve of the fabric, noticing details he had no business noticing the thin strap, the small bow stitched at the front, the audacity of the colour. Black. Not soft pink. Not red. Black. His jaw tightened.
The thought that someone else had seen this on you before it ever touched the floor made something low and territorial coil in his stomach, something he immediately rejected. He had no claim. You were not his. You had never been his. So why did it feel like something had been taken?
He scrubbed a hand down his face, frustrated with himself, with the direction of his thoughts, with the sharp, unfamiliar edge of jealousy he refused to name as such. Maybe he was just confused. Maybe he didn’t know how to return it without exposing that he had noticed at all. Maybe he was sparing you embarrassment. Maybe he was sparing himself something worse. Or maybe it was both.
His pulse thudded heavily in his ears as he leaned forward, opening the drawer of his bedside table with a quiet slide. For a second, he hesitated, staring at the shallow space inside - a book, his phone charger, a few loose coins. Mundane things. Ordinary things. He placed the black woven lace inside. It looked out of place immediately, a dark, sinful streak against the wood, but he didn’t remove it.
Instead, he paused, fingers lingering there, hovering as if reconsidering. The air in the room felt thinner somehow, heavier against his lungs. He was alone with such a part of you.
This was temporary, he told himself. He would give it back later. When it wouldn’t feel loaded. When he could do it without betraying something in his expression.
He closed the drawer slowly. The soft click sounded louder than it should have. For a moment he just sat there, elbows braced on his knees, staring at the floor as his heartbeat gradually steadied, though not completely. The house beyond his door was alive with quiet domestic sounds; water running through pipes, cupboards opening and closing, your footsteps faintly shifting in your room. He swallowed. He had crossed no real line. And yet it felt like he had.
18+… living with your best friends hot older brother is great.. until he becomes a jealous mess…
pairing: choso x roommate fem! reader
- chapter 3/Impulses
- masterlink
synopsis: It was supposed to be nothing. Just one night with Suguru Geto after a party where Y/N stopped caring a little too much. But nothing stays simple when you live with his best friend. Choso notices the change immediately. The tension. The avoidance. The things she won’t say. And he doesn’t ignore it. Now every shared space feels smaller. Every glance lingers too long. Every touch feels like it means something more than it should. Because the real problem isn’t what happened that night; It’s what’s happening now.
*
The night feels wild in a way it hadn’t earlier. Looser. Sloppier. Like everyone has collectively decided they’re past the point of caring how they look. Giving all in.
Y/N feels different too.
Not quieter, not smaller. If anything, she’s louder - laughing too freely, speaking without rehearsing the words first. There’s a lightness to her movements, a recklessness that draws attention whether she wants it to or not. People notice. People linger looks a second longer. They always do when someone changes like that, even temporarily. It’s contagious. This is what fills gossip the morning after in sour breaths and sore heads. Mumbles of the night before.
Dares start flying once the shots are finished. Dumb ones. Loud ones. A chorus of voices talking over each other.
“Take another.”
“No, no - say it again.”
“Text them. Right now.”
She does a couple, laughs her way through them, cheeks warm, hands a little unsteady but determined. Someone comments on how bold she’s gotten. Someone else whistles. She doesn’t hear all of it, just the energy, the encouragement, the sense that the night is waiting for her to do something memorable.
That’s when the pool comes up.
No one claims responsibility for the idea. It just appears in the space between conversations, like it was inevitable.
“First person to jump in,” someone shouts over the music, pointing outside, “gets their pick of any bottle in the cupboard.”
The reaction is immediate - gasps, laughter, disbelief. It’s cold tonight. Cold enough that people have been hugging themselves when they step outside to smoke. Cold enough that breath shows faintly in the air. The selection of expensive heavy liqueur to drunk university students would win any over. From fancy sealed bottles or high volume – this host had all.
Y/N’s hand goes up before she can think twice about it.
The motion is sloppy, enthusiastic. She laughs right after, a little too loud, like she’s embarrassed by her own impulse. A few people snicker, assuming she’s joking. Someone says her name like a warning. Someone else says, “No way.”
She’s still smiling as she crouches down. That’s when the room quiets - just slightly.
She slips her shoes off first, careful despite everything, placing them neatly beside her bag. Then her earrings, fingers fumbling as she works them free, tucking them safely away like this is something she’s done before. Like this isn’t insane. Like she isn’t fully clothed at a party in the middle of a cold night. Her stomach was beginning to toss around, yet she was unsure if it was because of its contents or the jitters.
Nobara’s excitement is immediate and unfiltered through her wide smirk. She grabs Yuji’s wrist, already dragging him toward the back door. “Come on, don’t miss it.”
Yuji lets himself be pulled, still laughing, half-concerned. “Wait, wait—she’s serious?” His expression irked worry and a deep low excitement.
Outside, the cold hits hard and firm. The patio lights cast everything in harsh yellow, the pool a dark, still rectangle in the middle of it all. Steam barely rises from the surface, more imagined than real. People cluster around, arms crossed, jackets pulled tighter.
Choso moves more slowly from the crowd, unease settling low in his chest. He watches her step outside, barefoot against concrete, breath fogging faintly when she laughs again.
“You’re not actually,” he starts, stepping closer. His voice doesn’t carry far. “It’s freezing. You’re too drunk to swim.”
She doesn’t hear him. Or pretends not to.
Instead, she turns toward the pool like she’s been called up for something. Someone starts chanting her name. Someone else counts down for no reason at all. She makes a show of it - spins once, arms raised, bowing exaggeratedly to the cheers.
Choso stops at the edge of the crowd, irritation flaring sharp and directionless. He tells himself it’s because this is stupid. Because it’s dangerous. Because everyone’s watching her like this is entertainment and not a terrible idea. Drunk teens and water don’t stir well.
That explanation doesn’t sit right but it works for now.
She takes a running start. Bare feet slap against concrete sending shocks of cold up her spine, laughter tearing loose from her chest as she jumps. For half a second, she’s suspended in the air, hair flying, coatless, fearless. She appeared invincible, as if nothing could touch this high she was on.
Then the water swallows her whole. The splash is enormous. Cold explodes outward, drenching the people closest to the edge. The music muffles instantly, cheers rising to fill the space it leaves behind. Underwater, everything goes quiet. The cold is a shock, biting sharp through fabric and skin, stealing her breath before she can panic about it. Her clothes feel heavy immediately, tugging at her limbs. She kicks, instinct taking over, pushing toward the surface.
When she breaks through, she’s laughing - breathless, exhilarated, hair slicked back and clinging to her face. The cold doesn’t matter. Not yet.
The party loses its mind.
Choso exhales hard, only realising then that he’d been holding his breath. His eyes stay locked on her as she paddles to the edge, fingers curling around the concrete as she pulls herself up, soaked and glowing under the lights. Her chosen outfit stuck tightly around her body, hugging all the right places leaving nothing to the imagination. He quickly moved his vision away, yelling at himself on the inside.
People cheer. Someone hands her a towel she barely uses. Someone reminds her of the deal, already talking about liquor. She grins, triumphant. Choso doesn’t move. The night keeps roaring around them, loud and electric, but something has shifted, subtle, irreversible.
The cold doesn’t hit her all at once. It creeps in gradually, seeping through fabric and skin until her teeth start to chatter without her permission. Her clothes cling to her in an uncomfortable, heavy way now that the adrenaline has burned off, water pooling in the hems, soaking straight through to bone. The cheers still echo faintly behind her, but they feel far away, distorted, like they belong to someone else’s night. She hugs her arms around herself, laughing weakly as if that might be enough to shake it off, and glances around for something, anything that feels warm.
“Hey, can I shower?” she asks, voice a little too loud, a little too breathy, words tumbling over themselves. “I didn’t think about what follows after.”
The host’s girlfriend lights up instantly, delighted by her in a way that feels almost celebratory, like she’s part of the story now. “Oh my god, yes,” she says, already looping an arm through hers, steering her back inside. “Come on, you’re gonna freeze. I’ll find you something to wear.”
She’s guided through the house, past blurred faces and sticky floors, laughter smearing together into one continuous hum. The girlfriend chats the whole way, words bright and quick, telling her not to worry, telling her how iconic that was, telling her she’s obsessed with her now. Y/N nods along, smiling where she’s supposed to, but the cold is louder than the compliments. By the time she reaches the bathroom, her hands feel stiff, her skin hypersensitive, every sensation turned up too high.
The door clicks shut behind her. She locks it, she’s pretty sure she does and leans back against it for a second, breathing out slowly.
The bathroom is warm, dimly lit and a few empty cups laid around. She peels her clothes off piece by piece, fingers clumsy as fabric sticks and resists, every layer leaving her more aware of herself. Cold air bites at her skin immediately, goosebumps rising in waves. She catches her reflection in the mirror without meaning to.
She barely recognises herself.
Mascara has smudged lightly beneath her eyes, dark and uneven, giving her a look she doesn’t remember putting on. Her hair hangs wet and slick around her face, heavier than usual, darker. Her cheeks are flushed, eyes glassy, pupils blown just enough that it unsettles her. It doesn’t look like the version of herself she knows - the quiet one, the careful one. This reflection feels louder. Reckless. Someone she doesn’t quite know what to do with.
She doesn’t let herself stare too long. The cold matters more than the questions.
She turns the shower on hot, steam blooming almost instantly, fogging the mirror until her reflection disappears completely. Relief hits her the moment she steps under the water, heat soaking into her skin, loosening tight muscles, drawing a soft sound from her chest she doesn’t bother swallowing. The steam fills the room quickly, thick and blinding, wrapping around her like insulation. For a moment, she closes her eyes and lets herself exist there - warm, hidden, separate from the noise of the party.
Then she hears it.
The door.
A soft, unmistakable click.
Her eyes snap open. Her heart stutters, then speeds up, thudding hard against her ribs. She leans closer to the shower curtain, water still pounding down her back, steam curling thickly around her shoulders.
“Hello?” she calls, voice echoing strangely in the small space, higher than she intends. “Um-someone’s in here. I think you’ve got the wrong-”
She pauses, doubt creeping in. Did she lock it? She had, right? The night feels slippery, memories refusing to sit still. The alcohol hums warm and heavy in her veins, blurring the edges of everything.
Then she hears him.
“That was very brave of you, doll.”
Her breath catches sharply.
She knows that voice.
Slowly, cautiously, she reaches for the edge of the curtain and peeks out, steam parting just enough for her to see him leaning back against the tiled wall like he belongs there, like this isn’t an intrusion at all. Suguru Geto lifts his head at the movement, dark eyes locking onto hers instantly, something unreadable flickering across his expression as his mouth curves into something not quite a smile.
The sight of him does something to her that she isn’t prepared for, something low and sudden that coils deep in her stomach before she can reason it away. The bathroom feels impossibly small now, steam clinging to the walls, the air thick with heat and the lingering scent of soap and chlorine. She’s acutely aware of herself - of the fact that she’s bare beneath the spray, skin still flushed from cold and adrenaline, with only the thin barrier of the shower curtain between them. The closeness makes her lightheaded. It feels dangerous in a way that makes her pulse thrum louder in her ears.
His gaze drifts downward, slow and deliberate, and even though she knows he can’t actually see her, the sensation is unmistakable. It feels like being seen anyway, like he’s tracing the shape of her through steam and imagination alone. Her shoulders tense instinctively, breath catching as though his eyes have weight to them, pressure. She grips the edge of the curtain, unsure whether she’s holding it closed or steadying herself.
“Did you mean to come in here?” she asks, trying to sound steady, casual like this isn’t unravelling something inside her.
There’s a pause on the other side. Not hesitation. Consideration.
“I think I did,” Geto says easily, voice low, threaded with something that makes her stomach dip. “But if it’s not right-”
She cuts him off before she can think better of it. “No- I mean” Her words stumble, tangled and honest in a way she rarely allows herself to be. “Why are you even wanting this? With me. You’re… you.” A breath. “And I’m me. We’ve never talked before.”
He turns fully then, posture shifting, attention sharpening. The casual ease doesn’t leave him, but something intent slips beneath it, something that makes her feel suddenly pinned without being touched.
“I see you now,” he says, simply. “And I want more. Is that so bad?”
The question hangs in the steam between them, heavy and unresolved, and she doesn’t have an answer ready. Only the way her heart is racing, the way the heat of the shower no longer feels like enough, the way his presence alone has shifted the night into something she doesn’t recognise but can’t seem to step away from either.
That lands harder than she expects. Her fingers tighten around the curtain again, knuckles pale. Steam curls around her shoulders, fogging the mirror, softening the edges of everything - except him.
“Then why now?” she asks. “Why tonight?”
He considers her for a moment, head tilting slightly, as if the answer matters enough to choose carefully.
“Because tonight you stopped hiding,” he says. “And I stopped pretending I didn’t notice.”
Her chest tightens. “Pretending?”
Geto steps closer to the shower - not enough to touch, but enough that she feels it, the shift in space, the subtle claim of proximity. His voice lowers, instinctively, like the walls might listen.
“You don’t look at people the way you think you do,” he continues. “You watch. You’ve always been more aware than you let on.”
Her breath stutters. “You’re wrong.”
“Maybe,” he allows. “But you don’t look surprised.”
Silence stretches between them, broken only by the steady rush of water. She becomes painfully aware of how exposed she is, how the curtain clings faintly to her skin when the steam shifts.
“And Choso?” she asks suddenly, the name sharp, grounding. “What about him?”
Something unreadable passes over Geto’s face, fast, gone almost before she can place it.
“What about him?” he asks.
“He’s your best friend,” she says. “He trusts you.”
“I know,” Geto replies. No defensiveness. No guilt. Just certainty.
“That doesn’t bother you?”
His gaze holds hers, steady and unflinching. “It makes things complicated,” he admits. “Not impossible. No different for his brother anyway.”
Her stomach flips, unease threading through the warmth pooling low in her body. “You say that like it’s nothing.”
“I say it like I’ve already thought about it,” he corrects gently.
That should scare her. Maybe it does. But underneath it is something else - something dangerous and intoxicating. The realisation that this isn’t impulsive for him. That he’s chosen this moment.
The way our eyes connected, entangled with one another – intoxicated - made something inside me flutter loose. Heat bloomed beneath my skin, flushing my cheeks and spilling down my chest in shades of rose and pink I couldn’t hide. I was painfully aware of myself then: bare, damp, breathing too fast, standing on the wrong side of a thin, useless curtain.
The gamble sat heavy in my chest. The what-ifs. The consequences I didn’t want to name. Every choice before me felt sharp-edged, dangerous, tempting in equal measure, and my heartbeat climbed higher with each passing second. There was a burr inside me, a restless ache, yearning for the other side of the curtain, aching for the space he occupied, for the gravity of him.
Impulse pressed at my ribs.
Need curled low and insistent.
Want burned brightest of all.
I knew this moment would not come again like this. Steam-drenched, reckless, suspended between leaving and staying. Between the person I was supposed to be and the one quietly clawing her way to the surface. My fingers tightened in the curtain, breath stalling as if my body were already leaning forward, already deciding before my mind could catch up.
And that was the most frightening part of all.
The steam curled thickly around her, clinging to her skin, masking her in a warm, misted bubble where nothing else existed. Her heart was hammering in her chest, a frantic drum against the quiet hiss of the shower, each beat echoing louder than the pounding music still faint through the walls. She could feel him there, just beyond the curtain - the subtle shift of his weight, the measured calm of him leaning against the doorframe. Every shadow, every faint glint in the dim light made her pulse spike.
A trembling hand reached out, fingers brushing the edge of the curtain. The fabric felt impossibly thin in her grip, a fragile veil between them, and for a moment she froze, unsure if she had the courage to cross that invisible line.
With a shaky breath, she tugged the curtain back - not all the way, just enough. Enough that he could see the outline of her, the sheen of wet skin catching the dim bathroom light, the curve of her shoulder, the hint of her ribs. Her body stiffened at first, shyness rooting her in place, but then something flicked inside her - a mischievous, unrestrained part that demanded she take control. She let the curtain fall a little further, teasing him, just teasing enough to let him see, not enough to give him everything.
The corner of his mouth lifted slightly, that slow, knowing smirk she had glimpsed earlier in the party creeping across his face again. “You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?” he asked, voice low, each word threaded with something dangerous and consuming. She felt it in her chest, a pull that made her shiver despite the warm water.
Her eyes flicked down for a moment, heart hammering, then back to his. “Maybe I am,” she whispered, letting the curtain slide just a fraction further, enough that the faint outline of her chest pressed into view, the mist clinging to her skin, teasing, softening. The boldness surprised her, the thrill, the way she felt alive, reckless, in control yet undone all at once.
The curtain slid another fraction wider, her hand lingering at the edge, teasing him, challenging him. He didn’t move closer. He didn’t speak. He just held her gaze. And it was enough. The slow, deliberate intensity in his eyes told her everything she wanted to know - every pulse, every tug, every unspoken word. She responded without a sound. A tilt of her head, the curve of a shoulder, the tiny arch of her back. Silent, but laden with meaning.
His eyes followed every motion, every fragment of skin revealed and then hidden again, like he was memorising her, imprinting the outline of her body into his mind without need for words. The steam curled around her, thick and heavy, masking the soft flush rising across her chest and neck, the shiver that ran down her spine.
Her breaths came slower now, deliberate, matching some rhythm she couldn’t name, but she could feel in the way he lingered in his spot, the way he didn’t look away. A slight tilt of her head, just enough to catch his gaze fully, sent a shiver straight through her chest. The curtain was a thin line, separating them and holding them together at the same time. It was the perfect tension, the perfect game. She didn’t need to speak; she didn’t need to move closer. Her eyes, her small gestures, and the slow, teasing reveal of her body said everything.
He leaned subtly, ever so slightly, just enough that the tension between them thickened, palpable in the steaming bathroom. His lips parted fractionally, his chest rising and falling, every movement restrained, controlled, but hungry. She could feel the pull in the air, the slow, deliberate acknowledgment of desire stretching across the small space. She let the curtain slip back once more, just enough for the barest hint of her back to peek through the mist, and she saw him swallow, eyes darkening with something raw and unspoken.
For a long moment, they simply held each other in that silent conversation - the mist, the curtain, the steam, the warmth of the water - and the slow, deliberate heat that passed between them without a single word. She was teasing, daring, in control. He was patient, restrained, yet every line of his body betrayed the hunger coiled beneath, the want he didn’t dare speak aloud. And still, nothing needed to be said. Not yet. Not while the game played on, and the curtain, her curtain was the only line they needed to navigate desire, anticipation, and the slow burn of knowing each other in a way neither had expected.
Then, a faint sound made her pause.
Cloth against tile, the soft rustle of clothing being removed. The deliberate, slow sound of him undressing outside the shower made her chest tighten and her legs quiver. She pressed herself slightly against the tiles, shivering not from the water, but from the awareness of him standing there, waiting, unhurried. Her breath caught every time a button slipped undone, every fabric fold hitting the floor.
A shiver ran down her spine. Her hands clutched the curtain, heart hammering, mind racing with a mix of anticipation and nerves. She wasn’t sure if this was courage or folly, but she didn’t pull back. She let the curtain slip from her fingers, letting it open fully.
Then she felt it. The subtle click of the shower curtain moving, and the press of heat behind her. He was there. Close. Too close. The small bathroom seemed impossibly tiny, the walls pressing in as if aware of them.
“You gone shy now, doll?” His voice was low, teasing, dark, sending a rush of heat through her core.
Before she could answer, a strong hand crept around the curve of her neck, gentle but firm, tilting her head slightly. She gasped softly as his lips suddenly brushed hers, warm and insistent, catching her off guard. She felt him press fully against her back, hard and solid, water running over both of them. The sensation was overwhelming; the heat of him, the slick press of his wet skin against hers, the tightness of the small space making every movement feel magnified, urgent.
She trembled, breath hitching, instinctively pressing back against him, letting herself feel the electric tension that threaded through every inch of contact. His hand at her neck guided her just slightly, tilting her face as if to say he was in control but trusted her entirely. Her wet hair clung to her shoulders and back, plastered to him as he pressed closer, the press of his chest firm, undeniable.
A small shiver ran along her spine as she let herself lean into the sensation, letting the closeness of him fill every space she hadn’t even realized was empty. Her pulse pounded, a mix of nerves and desire, the water running over them both a relentless, intimate drum. For a moment, the world outside vanished completely.
His breath ghosted over her ear, low and deliberate. “You feel that, don’t you?” His tone was teasing, but edged with hunger, patient and deliberate. Every brush of his wet skin against hers sent little shocks through her, and she had to bite her lip to keep from responding too loudly.
Her hands curled into fists at her sides, then tentatively, almost without thinking, she let them slide across the slick tiles, grounding herself, letting her body adjust to the heat, to the weight, to the closeness. She could feel his chest rising and falling just behind her, matching the rhythm of her own pulse.
“You like that, huh?” he murmured, lips brushing her hairline, the movement of his mouth sending warmth down the back of her neck. She didn’t answer. Words felt pointless, redundant.
The space felt impossibly small, his warmth pressing against her back. Every brush of his arm sent shivers down her spine. He held her close, hand at her neck, lips brushing her hair, then licking at her neck, his presence grounding and overwhelming all at once. She trembled, heart hammering, caught between nervousness and something wild she couldn’t name. Their breaths mingled, the steam curling around them, and in that silence, the air between them crackled with unspoken intent.
Then his empty hand found itself wrapping itself down her body, making its way in between her heat. His fingers slid slowly through her hot folds, sending shocks of electricity waving through her body. Her back arched forcing herself to be driven into him more. At first his middle finger drove little delicate circles around her bud, caressing it, loving it with his all. This was better than she ever imagined, all the times in bed by herself touching herself – pleading for somebody to touch her.
Behind her, he was a smirking hard mess, hand gripped tightly around her delicate neck he was leaving marks on not long ago. The water beaded over him, glistening in the dim bathroom light, emphasising his toned and worked body. His member slid against her back leaving wet trails he couldn’t prevent. All he was thinking about was how he had to have her and how much she got him worked up.
“You’re such a mess,” he murmured, voice low, carrying a weight that made her chest flutter. “I want you all to myself.”
She shivered, the steam wrapping around them like a warm, suffocating blanket, and she could feel the heat of his presence pressing close behind her. Her heartbeat thundered in her ears, each pulse a reminder of the tension simmering between them. She bit her lip, caught somewhere between nervousness and daring.
He leaned in, his breath warm against her skin, and she felt a shiver run through her, trembling at the nearness, the unspoken promises in every movement. Her hands moved almost of their own accord, brushing against him lightly, testing, teasing, savouring the pull of his energy.
“You’re driving me insane,” he murmured, voice husky with something she couldn’t quite name. “I’ve never wanted anyone like this.”
She felt him shuffle behind her, his hand that was around her neck retreating to her curve of her hip as the other worked continuously between her legs, unleashing heat and unfamiliar pleasure. His hand then wrapped around his member sliding it against her, teasing her swollen heat. He then positioned himself aligned with her entrance and pushed in. Her head was thrown back in pain and euphoria as he decorated her neck with gentle kisses, an utter contrast. She held herself up hand planted against the slippery tiles. Through the pain, she was drowning in immense pleasure – feelings unknown to her. He pushed again, deeper, harder earning a high pitched noise from Y/N. His guttural voice joined with hers as he picked up the pace.
A sudden pressure pressed against her side, firm and unyielding, and though it should have been alarming, it sent a rush of heat spiralling through her. The sharpness of it, the undeniable claim of him holding her, left her breathless, caught somewhere between fear and fascination. Her eyes fluttered shut, and in the quiet haze of steam and shadow, her mind whispered for more; more closeness, more of the thrill of being seen, of being caught completely in his orbit.
Every heartbeat, every small press and pull, felt like it was mapping her out, learning her in ways words never could. The intensity of the moment intoxicated her, unsteady and dizzying, a dangerous pull she couldn’t, or didn’t want to resist.
The shower had shrunk to nothing but steam and the press of him behind her, every inch of her body on fire. His hands gripped her like he couldn’t let go - one arm wrapped tight around her waist, the other at her neck, steadying her, claiming her. Every shiver she tried to fight was met with his firm weight pressing her back against him, chest against shoulder, hot and unyielding.
Her pulse hammered violently in her ears, each breath shaky, too fast, too urgent. She tried to twist, to pull back, just a little, but his hold adjusted, unrelenting, impossibly precise, leaving her nowhere to go. Every press of his body against hers, every brush of his hand along her side, drove a coil of tension higher, tighter, like it would snap if she didn’t surrender.
A sharp, guttural sound slipped from her throat, a mixture of breathless moan and gasp, and it made him tighten instinctively. “G-give it to m-me please oh my gosh”, Everything escaping her lips was pure ecstasy. Drunken pure admiration.
The sensation; pain and pleasure interwoven was almost too much, a storm inside her chest and stomach that made her knees weak. She clutched at the tiles for balance, but his body moved with hers, holding her upright, grounding her even as it ignited every nerve in her body.
“You’re guna make me come, fuck-” he murmured into her hair, his voice low, rough, and commanding. His deep forceful thrusts quickened, as he reached entangling his hand within my hair lengths. Pulling. Hard. Fucking hard. The words hit her like fire, every syllable vibrating along her spine. His chest pressed harder against her back, his grip around her waist unyielding, and she felt herself tipping into a frenzy she couldn’t stop, couldn’t think past.
Her back arched against him involuntarily, the coil inside her snapping tight and bursting at once, sending heat, shivers, and dizzying sensation coursing through her. She gasped, eyes fluttering shut, and for a moment the water, the steam, the world outside vanished completely - there was only him, only the press of his body, the firm, grounding hold that made her feel as though she could melt into him and never come up for air.
Every movement of his hand along her sides, every subtle adjustment of his weight, drove the storm higher, more urgent. Her knees threatened to buckle, her fingers clutched at the tiles and his arms alike, and he held her steady, relentless, impossibly strong; letting the tension roll through her, letting it break over her in a torrent she had never imagined she could feel. She finally felt those hot coils unleash deep within her, with one finally thrust – he pushed his seed so deep I admired the touch of bruising and sensitivity.
When it finally ebbed, she sagged against him, still trembling, skin flushed and slick with water and heat. His body remained pressed against hers, heavy and grounding, warm and solid, keeping her upright even as her heart tried to slow. Her breaths came ragged and short, and the echo of her own rapid heartbeat filled her ears.
“Damn… doll,” he murmured, voice rough, near a growl, but there was softness under the intensity, a slow, deliberate savouring of her surrender. He shifted slightly, just enough to press her closer, hold her tighter, lingering in the space where the storm had passed but its residue still thrummed like electricity through them both.
For a long moment, the two of them stayed like that, water cascading over them, steam curling around the small bathroom, breaths mingling, hearts racing in tandem. The world outside the shower didn’t exist anymore. There was only the press of his body, the heat, the lingering pull of the storm they had shared, and the undeniable, forceful imprint of it all pressed into her memory.
Now, she was just left wondering about what the hell she had just done.
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18+… living with your best friends hot older brother is great.. until he becomes a jealous mess…
pairing: choso x roommate fem! reader
wc: total work so far 42k, 9 Chapters rn
synopsis: It was supposed to be nothing. Just one night with Suguru Geto after a party where Y/N stopped caring a little too much. But nothing stays simple when you live with his best friend. Choso notices the change immediately. The tension. The avoidance. The things she won’t say. And he doesn’t ignore it. Now every shared space feels smaller. Every glance lingers too long. Every touch feels like it means something more than it should. Because the real problem isn’t what happened that night; It’s what’s happening now.
content: mdni, smut, fluff, angst. Choso x reader, top choso, modern au, college au, drug use/drinking, drunk sex, pining, kissing, sexting, oral, teasing, panty stealing freak choso, slowburn, obsession, slight plug!choso, tags to be disclosed…
art:dc not me! trying to find @s but I made the collage. Original rights to their owners love u
I have the whole series uploaded on AO3 and Wattpad:
•AO3 Link
•Wattpad Link
•Masterlink
prologue:
I live in the same apartment as Choso. I brush past him in the hallway, wash dishes while he cooks, share a living room with him and his brother and yet, he doesn’t see me. Not really. Not in the way I burn to be seen. I am a shadow in his periphery, a ghost trailing the scent of laundry detergent and faint sweat, and he moves around me as if I am nothing more than furniture.
Choso is beautiful in that way you can’t help but stare at, though you know it’s forbidden. He’s your best friend’s brother, a name spoken with caution, an untouchable presence. Off-limits. Off-limits, yet here he is, in the same apartment, the same air, the same space I consume silently.
I can feel the pull of him, a dark gravity I can’t fight. It’s a fruit dangling just out of reach, tempting and spoiled at once, the sweetness masked by a rotting core that promises only sickness, obsession, and ache. Yet still, I long. Still, I reach. Every laugh he throws across the room at someone else, every flick of his fingers through his hair, every careless glance at someone other than me twists in my chest like fire.
I don’t know when this started, this craving, this addiction to his indifference. He moves through life effortlessly, unaware of the effect he has on me. I am invisible. A shadow that waits for a glimpse, a smile, a notice, anything that would acknowledge I exist.
And still… I ache.
Every step I take toward him is measured, careful, and meaningless. Every time our hands brush while passing dishes, every accidental touch is a jolt that leaves me hollow. He doesn’t know. He will never know. And yet, I cannot stop tasting this bitter, forbidden fruit that I can never truly claim.
I am his ghost. His shadow. His unseen. And he is mine in the way he can never be, the way I will never have.
chapter 1: unrestrained
“The red or black pair?” I held up two sets of lacy lingerie to my phone, cringing at the absurdity of it all. Honestly, the likelihood of anyone seeing these carefully curated, perfectly matching sets was virtually zero. And yet, here I was, holding them up like a desperate display, half-expecting a verdict that mattered more than it should.
“Definitely the black one! It will look so hot, Y/n,” Nobara’s voice came through the phone with a slight delay, but the warmth in it stretched across the space between us. Nobara - my best friend for over three relentless, unflinching years - had this way of keeping me on my toes, of nudging me toward edges I didn’t even know I had. She meant the world to me, even if our friendship thrived on chaos and teasing. I made a mental note to ask my roommate about the Wi-Fi issues later.
“Is it too… slutty? I mean…you know what I mean” I trailed off, unsure if I even cared about the answer. The thought was rhetorical, really.
“Maybe tonight is the night, I think I can feel it. My senses are tingling.” she said waving her arms around mystically, that laugh of hers floating through my headphones. And I did. Deep down, I knew it didn’t matter. Not really.
I hadn’t planned on messy nights with the football team, the kind of reckless encounters that left you sticky, breathless, and ashamed. I wasn’t like her - I didn’t indulge in fleeting pleasures or late-night bar toilets. I’d always protected myself from humiliation, from rejection, from that stinging embarrassment. My life had been a careful dance of tiny white lies: too busy with university, low libido, lack of energy. I told myself I was fine. I was fine.
But then, late at night, the thin walls of our apartment betrayed me. His presence, audible even through the paper-thin separation, unsettled my resolve. I hear him bring someone else home, soft laughter, footsteps on the floorboards, and I imagine just for a heartbeat - what it would feel like to be there instead, underneath him, the weight of him pressing against me. My body betrays me with a shiver at the thought, and my soul aches with longing for something I can never claim.
And just like that, the fantasy vanishes. Cold shoulders. Small talk. The mundane reality of him in the next room keeps my feet firmly on the ground, but my mind, my body, and every hidden corner of my desire remain suspended in quiet torment. He doesn’t see me. Not really. Not in the way I burn to be seen. I am a shadow in his periphery. Just his brother’s best friend. That’s all I am. And yet… I ache. I ache for the forbidden fruit dangling far from the tree, gleaming, tempting, rotten at its core. I ache for it even knowing the taste is foul, that every bite leaves me unfulfilled, hollow, craving more even as it poisons me. Every laugh he gives to someone else, every careless glance not meant for me, twists in my chest like fire; painful, intoxicating, impossible to extinguish. I know it will never satisfy me, and still, I reach.
Pulling me back into reality, I swigged down my drink, a little too much vodka, letting the burn cling to my insides, spreading warmth through my chest and tinting my cheeks a soft, rosy hue. My phone slid onto its back on the dresser, myself out of view as I reached for the black set, a thrill of defiance running through me. The outfit wasn’t much - just enough to be seen, but not enough to be acknowledged.
A little black skirt, shrunk slightly in the dryer, clung to my hips and traced the gentle swell of my thighs. My halter red top contrasted sharply, the edges of delicate lace teasing out along the sides of my bust, a subtle hint of vulnerability I hadn’t expected to feel. Nobara had stressed for twenty minutes that I had to wear this. “It’s perfect, trust me, Y/n!”, her voice still ringing in my head, a mix of excitement and mischief.
I studied myself in the mirror and barely recognized the reflection staring back. My curves, usually hidden beneath loose layers, were suddenly bold and exposed in the dim lighting, accentuated by the flush of alcohol. The fabric hugged me in all the right places, teasing me with the dangerous thrill of being noticed, of existing in the peripheral attention of someone I wasn’t supposed to want. And as I adjusted the straps, smoothing the lace against my skin, I felt it; the ache, the hollow pull, the longing for eyes that would never linger the way I wanted. Choso. His presence hung over me like a shadow, impossible to ignore, impossible to reach.
“You better drink up before you leave! I’ll see you soon.” Two beeps concluded our call.
I set the phone down, a hollow pit of anxiety settling in my stomach, the kind that no swig from my flask could fully chase away. My hands trembled slightly as I twisted the cap back on, the alcohol’s burn a poor substitute for the tension coiling in my chest. Parties had never been my calling. Crowds, noise, laughter bouncing off walls, strangers brushing past me; it should have repelled me, and yet tonight, it pulled me like a current I couldn’t resist.
I could already feel the pressure building behind my eyes, the way my heartbeat stuttered at the thought of him. Choso. The mere possibility of being within the same room, of existing even in his peripheral vision, made my pulse spike. I wasn’t prepared for this. I wasn’t ready for what I might feel.
And still, I couldn’t stop myself.
I slid my flask into my bag, adjusted my skirt once more, and stepped toward the door, each motion a silent, shaky promise to myself: Just survive the night
*
Finding Nobara and the group proved harder than I expected. When she’d said, “slightly bigger than usual”, I hadn’t realized she meant a full-blown Project X. The air pulsed with bass-heavy music, lights flickering across faces I didn’t recognise, and the faint stench of cheap alcohol clung to everything like a second skin.
Bodies pressed in from all sides; laughing, swaying, spilling red cups onto sticky floors and I couldn’t help but wonder who the hell owned this house. No one in their right mind would rent to people like this, I thought, ducking past a couple making out against the banister.
“HEY, Y/N!”
A familiar voice pierced through the noise, and before I could orient myself, a hand caught my elbow. Nobara’s grin was wide and flushed, her hair glittering under the coloured lights.
“This party is huge! There’s so many people here—we gotta go get drinks.”
And like a lost puppy, I followed. Obediently.
Her confidence was a current I could never resist, pulling me deeper into the chaos. I tried to match her energy, smiling when she looked back, pretending not to feel the tightness in my chest.
When we finally pushed through the crowd and stumbled into the clearing with the others, a thin, unfamiliar clammy feeling rolled over me - the kind that tickles behind the ribs and insists you notice it. Relief warmed at the edges, though; I wasn’t alone. Megumi stood rigid and watchful as ever, a quiet island; Nobara, impossibly dainty in the half-dark, was already two smiles ahead of the conversation; and Itadori, bright, loud, ridiculous - hovered like a sun that wouldn’t stop shining. We claimed a corner of the room and, in a ritual that felt both reckless and consoling, traded down the suspicious, syrupy liquor we’d scavenged from someone’s questionable stash. Each gulp was a dare, each grimace a shared secret.
We went through a few rounds, clinking disposable cups and making a show of it, because ritual makes things bearable. Small talk skidded across the surface - who’d ditched who, whose crush had done what, which lecture we could fake tomorrow. I could feel colour crawl up my neck: cheeks flushing, heat pooling behind my eyes. Maybe it was the cheap alcohol working its way through me, or maybe the press of bodies and laughter, or maybe just the need for air. The room smelled faintly of cheap cologne and smoke and the distant sweetness of spilled drink; stars pinpricked the sky, indifferent witnesses.
“Fuck, that was really foul,” I said, because laughter is the easiest place to hide a nervous flutter. I wiped at my mouth with the back of my hand, smearing the taste of burnt sugar and regret. Itadori snorted, the sound exaggerated, performative. “I know - this must be the cheapest, oldest off-the-back-shelf shit.” He shrugged with that eternal, ridiculous optimism, and for a second, I wanted to hate him for it.
“Also, Y/n, sorry about not seeing you before we left,” he added, face open and apologetic in the way that made it almost impossible to stay mad. “I was out with Megumi, then well. Next time we’ll go together. Maybe we can hitch a ride from Choso.”
The name fell into the circle like a stone into still water and I felt the ripple instantly. It wasn’t just that Choso had been at the same party; it was the sudden, cold spike of wondering would he notice me here? Had he even seen me at all? The question grew legs, pacing under my skin, bringing with it a thousand smaller ones: What if he did? What if he didn’t? The laughter around me blurred into a hum, and for a moment, nestled between the buzz of drink and the stretch of night, I found myself listening for a footstep that hadn’t yet come.
The music throbbed through my chest, a steady pulse that matched the wild rhythm of the room. I laughed at something Nobara said, more genuinely than I had all night, and for the first time, I felt a flicker of freedom, a tiny crack in the wall I usually built around myself. The vodka had loosened my edges, and maybe, just for a moment, I was allowed to exist.
“Let’s go freshen up before we get more drinks,” Nobara said suddenly, tugging me toward the bathroom. I followed, swaying slightly, grateful for a break from the crush of bodies outside. The hallway smelled faintly of cleaning supplies and lingering smoke, a sharp contrast to the chaos of the party.
Inside, she pushed the door closed behind us, the bright fluorescent lights cutting through the haze. I stared at myself in the mirror, trying to reconcile the girl staring back with the one I usually saw at home, tame, careful, invisible. Here, flushed and slightly dizzy, I looked… different. Alive, maybe. Dangerous, even.
Before I could dwell on it, Nobara leaned in close, her voice low and conspiratorial. “Hey,” she said, flashing a grin, “you wanna do something fun?”
I blinked. “We are doing something fun.”
She rolled her eyes and slipped a hand into her purse. When it came out, she was holding a small, clear pill with a brown like powder inside between her fingers, catching the glint of the bathroom. “Not this kind of fun,” she teased. “This is Molly. It’ll make everything... softer. Lighter. You’ll feel good. Promise.”
I stared at it. My heart did this odd flutter, half fear, half curiosity. “I’ve never done it before,” I admitted.
“Then it’s about time,” she said, pressing it into my palm. “We’ll take it together.”
I hesitated only a heartbeat longer, then nodded. Maybe it was the alcohol, maybe the low hum of loneliness that no amount of laughter could drown. I wanted to stop thinking. I wanted to stop holding back. The light flickered faintly above the mirror, yellow and unflattering. I could hear the bass from the other room, muffled but steady, like a heartbeat. Nobara popped her pill and grinned at me through the mirror. I swallowed mine dry, letting it sit heavy on my tongue for a moment before it slid down.
“ How long till it kicks in?” I asked, voice small, betraying the nerves I tried to hide.
“Twenty, thirty minutes,” she said, reapplying her lipstick like this was nothing. “You’ll know when it does.”
That sentence echoed in my chest - you’ll know when it does. You’ve got to be kidding me, what have I got myself into.
When we came back out, the clearing had mostly emptied; everyone was inside now. The sound hit us immediately, bass vibrating through the floorboards, laughter spilling over the beat. The air was thicker here, drenched in sweat, perfume, heat. Flashing lights painted everyone in pinks and golds, like we were underwater in neon.
Nobara tugged my hand, dragging me into the crowd before I could protest. We found Itadori and Megumi near the middle of the dance floor. Itadori was dancing with the reckless abandon of someone who didn’t care how ridiculous he looked, and Megumi stood beside him, arms crossed but head bobbing slightly to the rhythm. We started to dance too, swaying, laughing, bodies brushing against strangers in the blur of it all. My heartbeat began to sync with the music, the sound vibrating through my ribs. Nobara twirled under the shifting lights, hair catching pink, then purple, then blue. I followed her lead, clumsy but free.
Then, slowly the world began to change.
The air felt thicker, but also clearer, sharper. My skin tingled. The lights fractured into prisms; each one pulsed in rhythm with the bass. The music wasn’t just heard anymore - it was felt, crawling up my spine, blooming beneath my skin.
“I think so,” I said, though “think” didn’t feel right anymore. It wasn’t thought. It was sensation. My heart was racing, but I couldn’t tell if it was from excitement or fear.
Then, over the sound - a voice. His voice.
“Yo, Itadori.”
It cut through everything. I turned, and there he was.
Choso stood at the edge of the crowd, tall and impossibly composed, the low light catching him in a picturesque way. His hair was half-tied into his signature buns, a few strands falling over his forehead. He looked out of place here - too quiet for this noise, too still for this chaos. His eyes flicked to me for a brief, razor-sharp second, like recognition, like heat - before returning to his brother.
“You heading home tonight?” he asked, voice deep, casual.
Itadori grinned. “Possibly or I’ll go back to Megumi’s. You?”
“Maybe, depends,” Choso murmured.
And then, beside him - I saw him.
Geto. Choso’s best friend. I’d seen him before, but never like this; not under these lights, not with the molly beginning to curl its way through me, heightening everything. His black hair was tied back loosely into yet another bun, a strand brushing his temple. His shirt was half unbuttoned, and I could see the edge of a tattoo curling against his chest.
His gaze found me instantly. Heat signature. It was like being pinned in place; slow, deliberate, burning. He didn’t look away. His eyes moved down, tracing the shape of me as though he was memorising it, the curve of my neck, my shoulders, the rise and fall of my chest beneath the dim light. My pulse jumped.
The music thundered, the crowd spun, but I could only feel that gaze. When he finally met my eyes again, the corner of his mouth twitched, a small, knowing smirk. Something deep inside me shivered. Choso and his brother continued talking about something however all my attention was drawn to him.
That was when I saw him come from beside Choso, then forwards to me. I wanted to pinch myself, wake up from whatever incredible dream I was having. Nothing worked.
“You’re Y/n, right? Itadori and Choso’s roommate?”, He stood so tall over me, yet with how many people where dancing and bumping around he stood so close yet didn’t touch me. Hovering over me, with those eyes, dark deep eyes. I couldn’t tell if his they were undressing me or if I was truly losing it next to him.
“Yeah, I am… it’s nice to meet you”. I was unsure what to do with my body, I kept dancing slightly next to Nobara – I wanted to ask her for help but at the same time I didn’t want her to sabotage anything. She had the tendency to say whatever came to her mind first. “Your name is Suguru?”.
“Oh, I mean, Geto for you”. His gaze followed the sway of my body tracing my outline down to my hips. I couldn’t help but look back at Choso and Itadori who were completely obvious to his advance. They were deep in conversation.
“I don’t think I’ve seen you out before, I would’ve recognised you”, suddenly a train of people made their way just beside up, pushing him next to me where he then moved behind me. You know how it’s like that at party or festivals, always in the invisible walkway. I felt his hot palm rest upon my hip, “Sorry, is that okay?”.
He was touching me and wanting to touch me. The realization came in a slow, dizzying wave that curled through my chest and unfurled down my spine. It felt forbidden in a way that made my pulse stutter, strange enough to leave me breathless. The floor beneath my feet seemed to tilt and soften, the pressure of my shoes dissolving until I couldn’t feel them at all. The cheap heels I’d regretted an hour ago no longer bit into my skin or pressed against the hastily placed bandages on my heels. Everything that should have hurt simply… didn’t.
Instead, there was warmth. A floating, syrupy warmth that made every movement feel amplified, as if my body were tuned too sharply, every nerve humming. Even through layers of fabric, the connection between us buzzed low and insistent, a deep vibration that settled somewhere beneath my ribs and asked for more, more of something I didn’t yet have words for. Something unfamiliar, intoxicating.
I think this is what Nobara was talking about.
When I turned my head, she was suddenly in front of me again, the lights painting her face in neon flashes of blue and pink. Her eyes were wide, pupils blown, lips parted in a knowing grin. She mouthed something I barely caught over the music “drinks” and pointed vaguely toward the bar. Before I could properly respond, she was already backing away, swallowed by the crowd, leaving me standing there with my heartbeat thudding far too loud in my ears. Alone. Almost.
“No—no, that’s fine,” I muttered, unsure who I was even answering. “I mean, I don’t party regularly.”
The words slipped out thin and fragile. I became painfully aware of how close he was, of how little space existed between us. When I shifted, even slightly, I felt the solid line of his hips behind me, the undeniable reality of him there. His fingertips brushed my waist not accidental, not fleeting. Hungry, firm, deliberate. The touch sent a shiver racing up my spine before I could stop it.
“Don’t do molly regularly, then?” he said, his voice low and amused. I didn’t need to see his face to know he was smiling; I could feel it in the way his breath warmed the shell of my ear.
My stomach flipped. “What no. How did you know?”
“It was a stretch,” he murmured, pulling me a fraction closer, his words threading through the music. “But you proved it just now.” He leaned in, closer still, until his lips were almost brushing my ear. “Don’t worry. I’m good at keeping secrets.”
For a heartbeat, my attention fractured. I caught a glimpse of Choso and Itadori a short distance away, deep in conversation, drinks in hand, laughter spilling freely between them. The normalcy of it grounded me for half a second, just long enough for his hands to shift again.
Then he turned me. Strong hands guided me effortlessly, and suddenly I was facing him. Geto looked down at me, dark eyes steady, unreadable and intent all at once. A loose strand of his hair had escaped, falling forward to graze his forehead, so close it nearly brushed mine. The lights caught in it as the music shifted - slower now, heavier and the rest of the room faded into something indistinct and unimportant.
There was only heat. Tension. Movement that wasn’t quite movement yet, but the promise of it. The air between us felt charged, thick enough to breathe. When our eyes locked, I forgot the crowd, forgot the music, forgot everything except the way my body leaned toward his without permission.
“I’ll hold you to that,” I said quietly, my voice steadier than I felt.
Geto’s smile deepened, slow and knowing.
The beat swelled again, heavier, slower, vibrating through the floor and into my bones. Before I could think too much about it, Geto reached around me, his hands settling firmly on my hips. Not tentative. Not rushed. Just sure. The contact anchored me, palms warm and solid through the thin fabric, thumbs pressing lightly as if testing the rhythm of me.
I inhaled sharply, the breath catching somewhere between surprise and relief.
He guided me without force, a subtle pull that invited rather than demanded. I let myself follow, letting my hips move with the music, with him. The crowd blurred into colour and motion, lights streaking past like something half-remembered. Every sway felt deliberate now, our bodies finding a shared cadence that made the space between us disappear.
His grip softened, shifting from possession to something almost reverent. His thumbs traced small, slow arcs along my hips, not teasing—steady, grounding, as if he were memorizing the shape of me through touch alone. I could feel his chest behind me, the rise and fall of his breath matching mine too closely to be coincidence.
I turned slightly, enough that my shoulder brushed his chest, enough to feel him everywhere at once. The contact sent another wave of warmth through me, loosening something in my spine. Without quite deciding to, I lifted my arms and let my hands settle around the back of his neck.
His skin was warm beneath my fingers. Real. I felt the subtle tension there, the way he held himself together even now. My thumbs brushed the edge of his jaw, and I felt him still for half a second, like the entire moment balanced on that single point of contact.
Then he leaned in, just enough that our foreheads nearly touched, his breath ghosting across my cheek. His hands tightened briefly at my hips, not to pull me closer, but to keep me there, present, connected.
We moved like that, slow and close, the music threading itself through our bodies. Each shift of weight felt intimate, charged. My hands stayed at his neck, fingers occasionally slipping into his hair, feeling the way it curled slightly at the nape. His response was subtle - a deeper breath, a firmer hold but it told me everything.
There was no rush. No need to speak. The world outside this small orbit felt distant and unimportant. All that existed was the rhythm, the heat, the quiet understanding passing between us with every sway.
For a moment, I forgot to be careful. Forgot to be anything but here, wrapped in sound and touch, held steady by hands that seemed to know exactly where they belonged.
*
THRID POV:
*
The music crashed through the room in fast, relentless waves, bass heavy, sharp, vibrating through the walls and into their bodies. Lights strobed overhead in fractured bursts of colour, turning the crowd into a blur of limbs and movement. There was no room to think, only to move.
Geto and her were pressed together in the middle of it, bodies touching as they danced, the rhythm too quick and intoxicating to resist. His hand was firm at her hip, fingers splayed as he guided her movements, matching her pace effortlessly. Every beat pulled them closer, sweat and heat building as the song drove them faster. She laughed breathlessly, head tipping back for a moment as the music surged. The feeling coursing through her was dizzying, too bright, too loud, too good. Her body moved on instinct now, hips rolling with the beat, shoulders loose, unguarded. The world had narrowed to sound and sensation.
Geto’s hand slid lower as they danced, the movement seamless, almost lost in the chaos of the crowd. His grip tightened briefly around her ass, grounding her amid the frenzy. The contact sent a jolt through her, sharp and electric, and her reaction was immediate. She leaned into him without hesitation, breath hitching, body answering before thought could catch up.
Her hands came up, fingers curling into the back of his neck, gripping as if the floor might give way beneath her if she let go. Her touch was desperate and sure, pulling him closer, telling him everything she didn’t say out loud. The euphoria washed over her in a rush, hot, heady, overwhelming. She felt weightless, untethered, carried entirely by the music and the closeness of him.
Geto watched her closely, reading the way she moved against him, the way her fingers tightened, the way she surrendered to the moment without restraint. There was something darkly pleased in his expression as he leaned in, their bodies moving as one amid the flashing lights and pounding sound.
Then his eyes lifted.
Just beyond her shoulder, standing unnaturally still in the chaos, was Choso.
The music didn’t seem to touch him. His gaze was locked on them, intense and unblinking, cutting cleanly through the smoky haze of the party. There was no anger on his face - only warning, sharp and unmistakable. A silent reminder. A line that had just been crossed or was about to be.
Geto’s jaw tightened. His body remained close to hers, his hand still steady, but something shifted, an edge returning where abandon had been seconds before. The music continued to slam around them, the crowd surging and shouting, unaware. Yet in Geto’s mind, it screamed a challenge - he just had to get a taste of that forbidden fruit. You.
But the moment had changed. What had felt wild and limitless now hung suspended, balanced between desire and consequence, watched by someone who knew exactly what that look meant. Geto tossed options up within his mind, always leading with the one that got in your pants tonight. No matter the stir up that would follow, because the feeling of your needy fragile body on him - spoke to him in ways. Dark ways.
Geto chose her anyway.
The choice moved through him like a slow burn rather than a spark, deliberate and unrepentant. He leaned down, close enough that the noise fractured around them, his presence eclipsing the lights and the crowd. One hand stayed anchored at her hip, unyielding, while the other slid up, fingers threading into her hair.
He drew it aside with quiet intent, exposing the vulnerable line of her neck. The gesture alone made her shudder, breath catching as if her body had recognized what was coming before her mind could. She tilted her head without realizing it, offering herself in that small, unconscious way that felt more intimate than any word.
His mouth found her just beneath the ear.
Soft at first, barely a touch, more breath than pressure. A tease. A warning he had no intention of heeding. Her lips parted immediately, a faint sound escaping her, swallowed by the pounding music. Her fingers tightened at his neck, gripping him as if the floor had shifted beneath her again.
He continued downward, unhurried, letting each moment stretch. His lips lingered, pressing more firmly now, leaving heat behind marks that bloomed slowly, deliberately, like he wanted the evidence to stay. Her body reacted openly, arching into him, every nerve singing. The euphoria washed over her in thick, dizzy waves, blurring the edges of everything except him.
She turned her face slightly, exposing more of her throat, mouth open now as her breathing grew uneven. The sounds she made were soft, helpless, slipping free without permission. Anyone close enough could see it, the way her knees softened, the way her hands clutched him as if she might fall apart without the contact.
Geto lifted his eyes.
Choso was still there. Watching.
Their gazes locked brief, sharp, electric. A silent confrontation played out between them, heavy with history and warning. Geto didn’t look away. He let Choso see the choice he was making, let him witness the way her body responded to every touch.
Itadori had noticed too now, his attention pulled by the tension, by the undeniable way she was unravelling in Geto’s arms. There was no hiding it. No pretending this was accidental.
Geto returned his attention to her, mouth moving lower, pressure deepening, intent unmistakable. His hand at her hip tightened just slightly, steadying her, claiming the moment. Her fingers dug into his neck in response, breath breaking again as another wave of sensation rolled through her.
The party roared on around them fast, reckless, oblivious but inside that small, charged space, everything felt slow and heavy and inevitable. She was glowing, undone, suspended between desire and the knowledge that she was being watched. And Geto didn’t stop.
Nobara burst through the crowd like a streak of neon, plastic cups raised high as the bass rattled the floor. The strobe lights fractured everything into dizzying shards of colour - pink, blue, white, painting the crowd like a chaotic, living canvas. She spotted them immediately: Y/N pressed close against Geto, the subtle curve of her body leaning into him, her neck flushed and exposed, the faint tremor of her spine betraying the soft sway of desire. Nobara’s grin widened, eyes sparkling with unrestrained excitement.
She didn’t step forward, didn’t interrupt. She lingered, swaying with the beat, drinking in the scene like it was a secret reward she’d been waiting for. Her laughter was light, reckless, but oblivious to the undercurrent of tension she hadn’t yet noticed.
Choso, however, was entirely different.
He didn’t move. Not yet. Not openly. His eyes were fixed on Y/N, tracking her every micro-movement. The way she leaned into Geto, the soft arch of her back, the slight tilt of her head. He didn’t even realize why the sight set his chest tightening and made his stomach coil. It wasn’t anger. It wasn’t jealousy. Or maybe it was some strange, unnamed mixture of both. Every instinct in him was keyed to her, a silent alarm he didn’t understand.
He blinked and realized he had been holding his breath. His jaw felt tight, his hands balled into fists at his sides, but when he tried to move closer, his body refused. Why was he watching so closely? Why did it feel like the world itself had narrowed down to her, as if some part of him had always been waiting for this, and he didn’t even know it?
Nobara, blissfully unaware, pushed forward, laughter carrying above the pounding bass. “Oh my god!” she slurred, weaving through the crowd. “You guys- you guys Geto finally made a move!”
Choso’s eyes flicked briefly toward her, irritation flaring, but he ignored it, snapping back to Y/N immediately. He noticed every detail: her flushed cheeks, the soft rise and fall of her chest, the subtle tremor when Geto’s hand brushed her side. His stomach twisted, inexplicable heat spreading through him. He didn’t understand why he wanted to step forward, to claim her, to shield her - why his body reacted as though the moment might shatter if he didn’t.
Nobara, oblivious, leaned closer, voice rising over the music. “She just needed a bit of confidence!” she shouted, swaying wildly. “That’s all! Everyone does sometimes!”.
Choso’s jaw tightened, but he said nothing. He didn’t even know why his body was trembling slightly as he watched her. There was no rational reason for this intensity. She wasn’t his. And yet, every brush of Geto’s hand, every tilt of Y/N’s head, made his chest constrict, made his stomach lurch.
Nobara dropped her voice conspiratorially. “I helped her out,” she slurred, triumphant, leaning closer.
Choso’s fists curled at his sides. He didn’t step forward. He couldn’t, he didn’t even understand why he wanted to. “Helped her how?” he muttered, almost to himself. The words barely carried, but they were sharp, clipped with tension.
Itadori’s eyes narrowed, disbelief threading through his voice. “You totally drugged her or something, Y/n ain’t got the balls to do that”.
Nobara’s free hand shot out instinctively, aiming to smack his shoulder but both hands were occupied with the drinks, so she ended up flailing dramatically instead.
“Hey! Not so fast!” she protested, wobbling slightly in the chaos of the crowd. “She wanted it, look at her! She’s having the absolute time of her life! You can’t tell me she isn’t loving this!”
Her grin was wild, drunken, almost victorious, completely oblivious to the tension tightening around them, especially from Choso, who hadn’t moved an inch, his eyes still locked on Y/N with that unknowable, simmering intensity.
Choso felt exposed, keyed into every micro-reaction of her body. Her breath, the faint quiver of her lips, the way her fingers pressed lightly into Geto’s neck - it all struck him like a live wire he didn’t know how to handle. Why was he feeling this? Why did it matter so much? The music thumped faster, lights strobing madly across the floor, but all he could feel was the coil of heat and tension in his chest, the silent, urgent need to protect her, and the deep, nagging confusion that he had no reason to feel that way.
Choso’s jaw clenched tighter. He didn’t move. He didn’t intervene. But every instinct in him screamed to step closer, to shield her, to claim her in some unspoken, unnamed way. He couldn’t explain it. He didn’t know why it felt so urgent. All he knew was that he couldn’t stop watching.
Thank you so much for reading! I really hope you enjoyed, you are interested in me posting more parts on here please let me know and I shall. Always open to feedback!! love u means the world
Synopsis: It was supposed to be nothing. Just one night with Suguru Geto after a party where Y/N stopped caring a little too much. But nothing stays simple when you live with his best friend. Choso notices the change immediately. The tension. The avoidance. The things she won’t say. And he doesn’t ignore it. Now every shared space feels smaller. Every glance lingers too long. Every touch feels like it means something more than it should. Because the real problem isn’t what happened that night; It’s what’s happening now.
If you love Choso Kamo as much as me I’m sure you’ll enjoy this one. Crossposting between AO3 & Wattpad with 2 hours and counting of reading time.
- Currently 28,000 words and continuing with regular updates
- Contains smut, fluff, angst and some unconventional content. Choso a freak and maybe a lil pervert who knows
- porn with a plot
- LINK HERE TO A03 or search author Litithxe on Wattpad (Cohabiting)
“Their gazes locked brief, sharp, electric. A silent confrontation played out between them, heavy with history and warning. Geto didn’t look away. He let Choso see the choice he was making, let him witness the way her body responded to every touch.„- chapter 2, Cohabiting
““I hope you’re not dumb… like those other girls that talk to him.” His voice was low, barely above a breath, the words slipping out just close enough to me that I felt them before I fully processed them.„ - chapter 4, Cohabiting
“His thumb pressed just a fraction more into my skin, not enough to hurt yet enough to make me feel it.„ - chapter 4, Cohabiting
“He gripped tightly around her delicate neck he was leaving marks on not long ago. The water beaded over him, glistening in the dim bathroom light, emphasising his toned and worked body„ - chapter 2, Cohabiting
BTW - I’ve just posted anything like this before on tumblr I don’t know how people go about fanfics or anything!! So anything helps, even feedback or fellow people who love some jjk to interact with! Anything helps :)