My Beat Got Sick

     She had issues, problems, fears, just like everyone else but somehow that made her even more beautiful, even more amazing. I never thought she was perfect, and yeah I told her a few times she was, I don’t know why. Because to be honest I hate perfection, it is so boring and everyone wants it, everyone looks for perfection but I don’t, I have never liked it. Maybe in that moment I thought it was the right thing to say. I didn’t want to offend her, I didn’t want her to feel like she was not good enough. I guess I thought girls wanted to hear they are perfect. I was new to the whole relationship thing, I tried to say what I thought was right, not what felt right to me. In all honest, she was so imperfect, that was what made her incredibly amazing. I loved all of her “bad” things before I loved all of her “good” ones. I fell for her flaws way before I fell for her strengths. I was attracted to her mind, her darkest and deepest thoughts, her fears, her issues. It is so easy to love all the beautiful and positive things that a person has to offer. But I always thought you have to love what’s not so nice or beautiful about them. I learnt to love what she hated about herself, to embrace her fears, just so I could make her feel good about herself, so she would realize she was with someone who would love her unconditionally and irrevocably. There wasn’t “I love you but…” There only was “I love you”