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it is absolutely, so, very wrong of you! it's been non stop for months. harold! how are you telling me to give the people what they want? how long has it been for you? i'm still waiting to see when you'll return to the stage. that way i can make a surprise appearance at one of your shows. i have not made any plans for a tour. where exactly are you even right now? i heard something about italy. nonsense, blaming me for your desperation. how is this fair?

right, this is unacceptable - i don't appreciate this uno reverse switch you're pulling on me here. i've never put out an album i haven't toured - can you say the same there ? surprise appearence at one of my shows is sweetening me up though, should have expected nothing less from miss sweetener herself. jokes aside, i'm really glad you're putting out music on your own terms, and even more glad you're getting some time to lay low for a little bit. i've been around italy, bought a place there last summer, but been hanging about london these days. seeing my family and all that - you stateside ?

we might have been glossing over it, just a little? he is amazing and i am just lucky that he was willing to take me on as a client! he does dabble in men's hair. do i need to put a good word in? it is so great that they are since a lot of people seem to forget about them. especially in the film industry! we would be so lost without them.

put a great word in for me, please. say i have the most luscious locks you've ever seen. don't tell him i'm a british man until like, the end of the recommendation as he'll just presume i'll have a naked head soon. i do keep my hair short these days but, if i knew ' glen coco ' was doing hairstyles i would have never done the chop.

yeah ? you've missed me ? been a long time since i've heard words so sweet. i don't look half as good as you - fuck, good is an understatement. you look unreal, can't see why you weren't expecting to chat with me again, though. you know how i like to use my mouth.

So Haz, long time no see, buddy. Keep coming across these pictures and sightings of you in Italy, Japan and now London again. Do you have like any döppelgangers running around? Because then I'd love to hang out with the one that's in London right now. Catch up, have a pint, just gossip about everything and anything. @liightsups

you following me, niall ? am i going to have to get you in the courts so you, me and the judge can have a little discussion about stalking ? woah woah - you're in london ? well why didn't you start at that before i starting chitting chat about legal action ? you and me, some bevs, let's do it - i'm hoping you have some brilliant news to bring to the table 'cos i'm all out of updates.

i've had so many people asking me what i'm going to do now that i have free time. plus everyone is asking me about how i felt directing for the first time. i feel like this whole year has been a whirlwind but i have loved every second. i have zero idea what i'm going to do with this free time but i plan on trying to enjoy it. anyone have suggestions? @eminencestarters

with how busy you've been, it'd be wrong of me to be a bad influence and suggest anything other than sleep. though ... as hypocritical as it is, i have to demand what the people want - when you hittin' the road with eternal sunshine ? you just gonna leave the world in darkness and not bring a show to a city near me this summer ? never had you down for a self-centered person, grande, but here we are ... as i waste away waiting for a tour announcement ... making me go to the lifetimes tour out of desperation for something to shake my arse to ...

everyone is talking about the look that i did last night for the hollywood beauty awards. i was just so focused on the fact that glen "coco", my hair stylist, won an award! so much has been going on these past few weeks and i was so happy to be there to support him! a lot of people were asking what the beauty awards were but they've been going now for ten years and i think it's awesome! we can't forget those behind the scenes! @eminencestarters

i think we're really glossing over the knowledge that your hair stylist is ' glen coco ', here. spill the beanies, sweeney, how did you get such a hot hook up and does he dabble in mens' hair ? it's lovely that hair and beauty artists were getting some recognition, think they go under-appreciated too often. especially in the film industry. they create the whole on-screen character vibe, it's sick.

what up bitches, you're favourite kar/jenner is that what people call us? has arrived, lets turn this thing up - okay wow i need to shut up don't i!! lately stormi and i have been watching early 2000s classic movies whenever aire goes to bed, now can someone please give me some recs? because i'm running out that are kid friendly we started with Bring it on even with the minor swearing, i'm not like a regular mom i'm a cool mom!! hi i'm kylie as if you didn't know that. || @eminencestarters

i think karjenner is one of the things people call you guys. i always knew you'd be an amazing mother but introducing stormi to early 2OOOs classics already ? kylie, you're next level. i'm not scared of a manicure, facial and a throwback movie. clueless, legally blonde - my niece is obsessed with the princess diaries if that helps ?

for the first time in a very long time i have a ton of free time on my hands, and i have no idea what to do with it. i tried to pick new hobbies, but unfortunately all the ones that appeal to me i'm already pretty good at. i could travel but i've been doing that for months and i'd rather stay local for the time being. so yeah— if anyone has any suggestions on fun things to do during your downtime, i'm all ears. i'll even take new binge worthy show recs. @eminencestarters

come on, there's got to be something that appeals to you more than binge worthy shows. what kind of mate would i be if i let you waste your time off like this ? let's get some experiences goin' here. no point being young and rich just to sit on your couch. can keep it local, though, if we have to.

Ok Styles, where in the world are you right now? Seems like you're avoiding anyone and everyone, including me and I feel a little offended. Trying to get out of all those album number four questions? Or did you finally start on that? You've deprived everyone from new music for so long, think it's about time, mate. Any songs about me this time? @liightsups

you know me. here, there, everywhere. but also somehow ... nowhere. i've definitely started on it, had a couple of songs down for a while, it's coming up with a whole album concept and the visuals that i'm caught on. there's songs about you every time, lou. just a part of being my husband and all that. do i get to throw back some questions about LT3 ?

one of my newer friends asked me what it was like to date you, and i thought you should know i told her to find out for herself and gave her your number. i also happened to tell her to share it with as many people as possible so merry early christmas in the form of your number being leaked in a day or two. | @liightsups

so how does it feel, when people befriend you just to try and get my number ? jokes on you, jenner, i'll just pretend they've got the wrong number. i'll pretend to be one of your other, far less attractive exes. nothing will match the disappointment when they think you set them up with the wrong number.

you only cross my mind in annoyance, so don't flatter yourself. and i didn't hear you deny it, so i'm going to assume it's you pulling some childish prank. like we're on the playground when a boy likes a girl and pulls her hair? yeah, this feels like that. definitely not trying to make you jealous, because guess what harry? you mean less to me than a fucking bug squashed under my shoe.

i don't cross your mind in annoyance - you're just annoyed with how often i cross your mind. stop projecting. if i were pulling a prank it'd be better than that one. i don't know what you're talking about, you love it when i pull your hair. where are you anyway, ken ? searching high and low at this award show for you. need to get a lovely picture together so you can frame it, and take it down before i come over so you can keep pretending to hate me.

harry had only had a few glasses of complimentary champagne, his glittery painted nails a shimmer against the crystal liquid that was making him more bashful than he'd normally be. or maybe that's just nick, setting his crush on fire by looking hot and handsome and giving harry so much of his attention after too long without. his body language was subconsciously leaning towards nick ,and his hand fell from the coat hem back to his side as he resisted the pull to link their fingers. it wasn't his place, but he really fucking wanted it to be. harry didn't even try to hide the victorious smirk when nick took the step forwards, trying to suppress the feeling that it wasn't enough. it wouldn't be enough until they were chest-to-chest, or their lips mapped out the rediscovery of each others' bodies, or inside - harry cut his train off thought off at that point, and forced himself to remain present. even if being called ' sweetheart ' made harry positively melt. although he and his stylist had mapped out this outfit months ago, he's made some last minute amendments following his and nick's reconnection over the past fortnight. the sheer black shirt that had meant to go under his jacket was abandoned, torso of tattoos on display. his hair styled into perfect short curls, a slight highlight to his cheekbones - all choices that tried to scream ' remember the reasons you loved me, fucking please ' at the top of their metaphorical lungs. "well, as soon as you told me you'd be here, i had to make sure i looked good. how else am i supposed to convince you to come home with me after ?"

being called hot by someone who's a sex symbol is doing wonders to my ego, so thank you for that. i don't know what 'tearing up the afterparty' means, but i'm down. i can't drink too much since i have training to look forward to this week. plus, after our fourth loss, me and the team really need to get our heads in the game. but if you wanna tear it up with a sober me, count me in.

you're the sex symbol around here. d'you think i'm coming to games just for the sport ? silly. but yeah, i want to hit up the after party with you whether we're sober or not. things in my life have been all over the place lately, looking forward to tearing it up with you. you're one of the few normal people left in my life. well. normal-ish. you're not normal at all, actually. but you and i are always the same, that's what i mean.