Happy & Grateful

Sobrang bilib talaga ako kay God. Kahapon, I was about to give up on US. Lahat naman ng relasyon may pinagdadaanan, may hindi pagkaka-unawaan. Sobrang napagod na ako umintindi. Napagod na akong sumalo ng mga mali. Pakiramdam ko nga pasan ko na daigdig. Ilang taon na akong nagdarasal. Ilang taon na akong nagtitiis. Hindi ko na alam kung kaya ko pa. Pinipilit ko, kasi kailangan. Sa sobrang pilit ko, namanhid na yata ako. Puro pain at galit na lang nararamdaman ko. Lagi kong sinasabi na sana magbago siya (referring to Sky) na sana maiopen yung mind and heart niya. Akala ko hindi na ako pakikinggan ni God. Pero He did! Susukuan ko na dapat si Sky pero nagbago siya. Nagulat ako nung nag-open siya at inamin ang mga mali niya.

Ang sarap sa pakiramdam. Parang nabunutan ako ng mga tinik sa buong katawan. Ang galing talaga kumilos ni God. Sobra! Binibigay niya yung mga pagsubok dahil alam niyang kaya mo. Binibigay niya din yung saya at ginhawa sa TAMANG PANAHON. Isa na lang hiling ko Lord, sana magtuloy tuloy nang ganito si sky. Sana hindi na siya maging duwag. Salamat po Lord. I feel so relieved and blessed…

They call me yhen. I was born on the 1st day of November. I grew up in a broken family, but I’m happy. I can brag about how my grandmother raised us, the love and care that She give us is priceless. I so love Her and so She love me ♥ Me as a friend? well the truth is I’m friendly, but most of them guys and girls got intimidated by my snobbish and yeah, weird looks. But aside all of that I have many set of friends, coz I’m good in a way that I can be a true friend for those who deserve real friendship. I love hanging out with them, my crazy-stupid-retarded friends. I spend my everyday life afterschool hanging-out with them. Well the fact that I look weird, yeah I'm weird. I love weird things and doing crazy stuffs. I'm not your typical kind of girl. I have bipolar emotions, i often have mood swings which only means that I want peace, Inner-peace, my cave time. I look hard, I look tough. But the truth is I'm hopeless romantic and a big sucker for tears, a cry-baby. Hey I love fashion! I love dressing up, I love shoes and bags! I love being unique. I love making simple things extraordinary. I love compliments. I have my own fashion statement, own words, own life. Hey! Don't judge me based on what u see! not all that you can see is always what you get. I’m Limited and haters surely gonna hate me. Haters makes me famous. I’m an average modern girl. I live my life to the fullest but in moderation, finding bliss in a crazy-good way. I'm a couch potato, if I can sleep all day, I surely will. When I feel productive, I do write stories & letters. I’m a music lover. I love dancing. I'm a movie buff, 24/7 online, a blogger, a gamer.

I couldn’t believe that almost two years have passed and my daughter is already a toddler! Yep, you read that right, the little baby I’ve been blogging for the past few months is now an official toddler. Gone were the days when she’d just lay on her back, look straight in to my eyes and whimper whenever she wants to ask for milk. But now that she’s a toddler, she can already express her feelings more and more each day.

From lying on our bed, to lifting her head, to crawling and sitting and now she’s already walking and running. I tell you; toddlers spend all of their time roaming around the house, trying to do what you don’t want them to do as soon as they learn how to walk.

From the day she turned 1 year old until today, I have noticed so many things about her. She’s continually changing and developing day by day.

She loves to listen to If you’re happy and you know it.

She know when to say please, sorry an thank you

She appreciate things a lot more.

She can’t go out without her baby dolls

Hi there. It’s been so long since I last talked to you guys. So yeah, I’m posting some of my super late answered TA’s.

jiikaamaaaaar said:I miss youu Ate! :(    - I miss you din. Long time no usap. Kamusta?

cxymercado said:Ate Yhen!!! Cxy to. Sana kilala mo pa ko. Kamusta? Ang laki na ni babyy sayang di ko nasubaybayan, naging inactive kasi ako. You look so happy. That makes me happy. Stay safe always. Plsplspls send my kisses to nicole. :*:*:*:*

   - Hello. Syempre naaalala pa kita noh. Ikaw pa ba? Andito ka sa puso ko eh. Yiiiee! Kamusta? Miss ka na namin. Nako. Ang daldal na ni Nicole. Hehe.

chubibbongbata said:Ang cute ng little princess mo <3 Take care of her hihi btw, you have a very nice personal blog. Damang dama ko na mahilig kayo sa pink XD Good afternoon, Yhen! :)   - Hello. Salamat. Mwuah! Yes, love namin ang pink.

I miss my grandma so much that it makes me feel I am experiencing late onset post partum depression. I am sorry Nicole, my daughter if lately I have been cranky and ill-tempered most especially if you start to cry or wouldn’t eat your food. This is not what I have imagined. This month has been a challenge for me, and for some reasons, this sadness I feel right now is starting to consume me. I’ve always want to kiss and cuddle with you.I feel boxed-in right now, suffocated with what is happening with my life right now. I just miss my family. My old family. My brother, my sister, and my cousins. How I wish I could go back to the time where worrying and sadness is not my thing. I feel unworthy, taken for granted and with no support group. Sometimes, I want to break down but I know deep in my heart that I have to be strong for you. I still have you and your dad, and I think that is more than enough.

It’s been been 15 months since I first laid my eyes on my daughter and I can say with conviction that being a mother is not an easy feat. Before Nicole, I thought being a mom was just easy-peasy. Change the diapers, feed them, take care of them and most especially love them with all your heart. Now that I am a mom, I have discovered so many things. Things I didn’t know I could do. Being a mom has transformed me to a new me; I am like a totally different person right now. It’s so difficult to put into words but these are things I didn’t know I could do before I become a MOM:

1. I didn’t know how much I could tolerate myself watching the same cartoons over and over again. I even keep on humming their “theme songs”. Baby Einstein, Disney, Furchester.

2. I didn’t know I could suck and hold a snot, smell diapers and poo poos. I even have the guts to hold every diaper just to check if it’s full or not. :D

3. I didn’t know I could hold my pee for more than 6 hours just so I wouldn’t wake up Nicole from sleeping.

4. I didn’t know that I could sing and compose songs out of any words that come out from my mouth.

5. I didn’t know that I could appreciate the smell of sour milk, smelly feet and armpits (of a baby of course. Haha!)

6. I didn’t know that I have so much energy stored in my body. Ever since I gave birth, I never had the chance to get a good sleep. I am already lucky if I get 6 hours of sleep every day.

7. I didn’t know that I could deprive myself from buying something but I can splurge that much if it’s for Nicole.

8. I didn’t know I could dance in public just to lull Nicole to sleep.

9. I didn’t know I have a strong body. I’ve always complained carrying my school bag before, but now that I have Nicole, I can carry so many things all at the same time. 2 big bags on my right and Nicole on my left.

And here are my top 5 realizations

1 . I didn’t know that I could be a better person. (I hope)

2. I didn’t know that I could appreciate the real value of time. Now that I have a daughter, I always want to spend each moment with her. Time flies real fast so I need to make the most out of every minute I spend with her.

3. I didn’t know that I could have another source of inspiration other than my husband.

4. I didn’t know that I could be patient. I’ve always thought that I have a bad temper, but apparently it turned out that I am actually gentle in so many ways.

5. And last but not the least; I didn’t know that I could love in a very unconditional way.

Every Night I thank GOD for choosing me to be your mommy. I can’t wait to watch you grow into the woman I pray you’ll become. Being your mommy is such a privilege. All through out, I thought I knew what unconditional love is, but it wasn’t until you were placed in my arms that I truly understood its limitless meaning. You brought more love, joy and laughter into our lives than I could have ever imagined. Life is indeed better and sweeter when you came, even, crazier if I may say. Thank you for reminding us to take it slower, to live more, to love more, to laugh more and to learn more. Each kisses, cuddles, hugs and belly rubs, bed time stories, bath times, meals fed and nursing moments, cries comforted, shirts put on, toys played, song and dance numbers, every single laugh, smile and tear, every single moment has been a blessing and I can’t imagine what I did to get so lucky to have you in my life. Thank you for showing me how amazing life can truly be.

Lately, I’ve been going thru a lot. My grandmother died last January 15. My heart breaks into pieces. I always asked God “Why? Why do you need to do this?” But at the end of the day, I just thanked him. Grandma would no longer experience pain. No more migraines. No more heartaches and dissapointments. I know she’s happy wherever she was. {sigh} Thank God I was able to say “I love you” to her. Life is so short. You’ll never know if it’s the end. So think about this:

When was the last time you talk to. Your parents? relatives? or even your friends? When was the last time you say “i love you” to them? When was the last time you say “thank you” to them?

Now that I am a mother, I can really say that I really grow up. I already know the struggles being a parent. I’ve sacrificed everything for my child. And now .. I can truly understand what my Grandma always says “Enjoy life with the people you love” pssh, I really miss her. And now that she’s gone I promise to care take of my younger sister. I promise to let them feel they were loved. I promise to treasure every moment with them.