Life Just Got Awkward

Hal Hartley

- Surviving Desire

It doesn’t!!! even stand!! for anything!!!

“PATH is downtown Toronto’s enclosed pedestrian walkway linking 29 kilometres of shopping, services and entertainment connecting Toronto Coach Terminal to Maple Leaf Square/Air Canada Centre. The Acronym (PATH) does not stand for anything - just signals that there is a pathway.”

I’m not exaggerating about the part without a ceiling:

and like this

and like this

and like this

Here’s an entrance to the PATH at Union

And here’s another- also at Union

And here’s another a few blocks away, though tbh I have never been able to enter here because it always seems to be locked, no matter how much I want Wendy’s that day. 

And you’d think these mixed aesthetics would make it easier to navigate, or at least figure out where you are, but again, there are over 70 different entities designing this shit and not one original thought between them. So while you may well know when you step from one property to the next, whatever the look of your current section it’s more than likely they’re a nigh identical section somewhere further just to confound your mortal sense. 

Barbra Streisand and Elliott Gould during their honeymoon at the Beverly Hills Hotel, September 1963.

Undine (2020)

Maryann Brandon and Mary Jo Markey edited The Force Awakens. Maryann Brandon has worked on almost all of the shows and films Abrams has worked on and Mary Jo Markey is also a frequent collaborator.

Thelma Colbert Schoonmaker has edited all of Martin Scorcese’s films since Raging Bull and worked with him for around 40 years.

Sally Menke edited all of Quentin Tarantino’s films until her tragic death in 2010.

Julia Bloch is an editor gaining attention for her work on Blue Ruin and Green Room.

Hi, I’m Roswell, and I’m horny for Rick Moranis.

Recently, my friend Pat sent me a fuckload of Little Shop of Horrors stickers from 1986.

Each pack contains a piece of thirty year old bubble gum.

It tastes really bad.

But we’re not here to talk about my mistakes; we’re here to talk about God’s mistake–the mistake of making me so incredibly attracted to Rick Moranis.

Let’s begin.

This Rick Moranis is not very sexy at all. He clearly doesn’t want that thing in his mouth. The lack of consent immediately turns me off, but I will give him one point for kissable lips. 1/10.

A reasonably fuckable Moranis. He’s doing that Vaudeville rubberface thing that I’m big into, but this outfit could’ve used some shoulder pads and his hair looks kinda greasy. 3/10.

The doe eyes. The pouty lips. The loose curls stuck to his forehead with nervous sweat. Truly this would be a tremendously boneable Ricky M. were it not for the fact that I am very anti-gun. 4/10.

His nonthreatening posture and gentle smooch make me feel like he would tenderly nurture our many children. Thinking about having kids kills my boner. 5/10.

A classic Rick! This kind of goofball acting is what makes him so loveable. He looks like a math teacher who just realized he forgot Pi Day and that’s what does it for me, I guess. 7/10.

The rumpled collar and patented Moranis Confused Face really get me going, but the caption makes me think of someone with a Brooklyn accent screaming, “The X-Files!” while falling down a well. 8/10.

Oh, what I wouldn’t give to push Rick Moranis into a dentist’s chair and fill his cavities. I think this scene made me gay. 10/10.