thirteen

I just want to express my grieving of losing a friend. At first I thought she is a true friend yet everything has change. She married her long time boyfriend after 10 years. They are both my circle of friends. I always hang out with them on weekends. Our friendship seems ideal because we treat each other as a family. Not until they marry, though we still contact each other casually but it feels awkward. Last month she was persistent to refer me on their company but, odd happens. The HR that call me went hysterical when I tell her that I also have scheduled interview at the date. This schedule is prior to her call which she reacted and angrily said that I am not interested with the job. This put me on a trauma so I avoid mentioning a schedule interview to all preceding calls I got for interview. I can move on with that, though my friend who refer me for the job seems nonchalantly accept my apology and explanation. Honestly, she will get a huge commission if I got hired by her company. I never put into thought about that, because I believe she is kind and generous person. The last time we speak, our friend whom she referred and successfully hired on the company is with us. So, they talk about the company and the things they like about it. Again, they mentioned that I should be with them also. Although, honestly I don't really want it because it seems that I will owe her my living, that's exactly is happening with another friend whom she refer. Now, she speak with a tone of disgust as she explained that it is easy to get hired on their company if anyone is genuinely willing. That tone mock me because until now I haven't got a job and waiting for call of confirmation from my possible future job.

when I thought I lost me you know where I left me, You re introduce me to your love