Hi, I saw that you said Adeleâs dad was initially against her speaking up about the abuse. Iâm just wondering if you can point me to the source, as I canât seem to find it anywhere online:( A huge thank you in advance!
AdĂšle herself revealed it in the live interview with Mediapart. She explained how her father was against her speaking out about the whole story and so she wrote him a letter back in April to make him understand why she had decided to do so, and afterwards he changed his mind and supported her (he is one of the several people interviewed in the article written about AdĂšle).
She read the whole letter during the interview, it was extremely powerful and moving. I cannot gif it all because apart from being too long itâs very emotional and maybe the hardest thing to watch in an already hard to watch interview, but I can transcribe here what she read because I know a lot of people wonât watch a 1 hr long interview on such a sensitive topic but maybe theyâre interested in knowing what she said. Please be advised that child abuse is mentioned so read at your own discretion.
I will try to explain things clearly. This matter goes back 18 years. If I waited this long to expose the events, itâs because of a number of things which made talking impossible for a long time, and today a whole lot of other things which make remaining silent insufferable. What made it impossible to speak out was, among other things, the fact that Christophe was someone nice, that he had done so much for me, and that without him I would be nothing. What I consider today to be clearly pedophilia and harassment, I forced myself at the time to think it was love.Â
How can I tell you? Deep inside me, I always knew that something wasnât right, that it was not love, and when I went to his home I felt so dirty that I wanted to die. I found him disgusting, but i felt indebted to him because he did so much for me. He said incessantly to me, âItâs not the same with us, others wouldnât be able to understand.â He would always go about things in the same way. Heâd come close up to me, heâd kiss me and begin caressing me. I would get up, he would follow me, and I would end up sitting on the footrest which was so small he couldnât come close to me. He didnât want to look at things in the eyes. This is to say, he couldnât slap me and physically force me, because in that case he wouldnât have been able to avoid seeing himself for what he is. Thatâs to say, a 40 years old man, who abused a 12, 13 and 14 years old. Do you understand? Itâs not out of respect for the child I was that he didnât carry through with the act, it was because of fear of having to face himself.Â
I felt so dirty at the time, I had so much shame, that I didnât want to talk about it to anyone. Silence is never without violence. Silence is an immense violence. You probably remember that time, of the violence I went through alone, and you probably remember too that at that time I cut off contacts with everyone. I left my agent, I stopped the casting sessions, I myself abandoned the idea of doing cinema. I decided to survive and go off on my own rather than staying. Who then came to see me to help me, for my wellbeing, for my career? All the kind consideration of Christophe didnât prevent him from turning away from me and to pursue his political commitment in favor of children, his life in the world of cinema, as if nothing had happened. I disappeared, and with me disappeared the risk of being caught one day for his dirty affair. What a pity for him that one day, at the end of a party, I bumped again into Christel Baras, who subsequently cast me for âWater Liliesâ, and I came back. Fragile, but I came back. As of that moment, and in large part thanks to meeting CĂ©line (Sciamma), who is the most important encounter of my life and my career, sharpened by a desire for revenge, I became a blade, stronger, to the point of becoming what I am today. Iâm talking of social status. I am socially powerful now, and Christophe has only become weaker. But this inversion of the balance of power is in itself insufficient to fight against the balance of power imprinted from early adolescence. Despite that, I still continued to be afraid. Concretely, that means the heart beating fast, the hands sweating, the thoughts becoming clouded. Fear, notably, during the rare times in which Iâve found myself in Christopheâs presence.Â
To tell you something else, what you thought was 18 years of silence, I crossed it feeling like being gagged, with lots of false truths that suited everyone. For example, very often I found myself in front of people, even people I love very much, who, without me speaking about anything concerning this matter, would say to me, âNo, Christophe is a good person.â What I want to say is that, from what Iâm telling you in part in this email, you can imagine that âa good personâ is not exactly a proper description of Christophe. I want to tell you another thing. The remaining reasons for which Iâve made the decision to speak out are a documentary about Michael Jackson called âLeaving Neverlandâ, and also that I learned by chance that Christophe has launched a casting for a new film, whose main characters are called ChloĂ© and Joseph, like in âThe Devilsâ. Perhaps you view this detail as just a small matter, but to me itâs enormous. It means he completely denies my story. If Iâm talking about it to Mediapart, after having envisaged other possibilities, itâs because the journalist is going to lead a thorough investigation. You seem to think that Iâm trying to seek attention with these revelations, or that Iâm trying to drag my psychoanalysis into the public arena. Youâre missing the point. If Iâm speaking out, itâs not to burn Christophe. Itâs to put the world back on the right track, a world which is upside down in lies. If Iâm speaking, itâs so the torturers stop strutting around and are forced to face things. If Iâm speaking, itâs so that shame switches sides. If Iâm speaking, itâs so that this exploitation of future children, of women, ceases, so that there is no longer the possibility of double-talk. You speak to me of forgiveness, but allow me ask you, has someone asked for forgiveness? Forgiveness for what? I understand your decision not to talk, itâs entirely your right. As for me, I think that if we do things together, we can do something really good, which would consist of looking clearly at our past, which came close to destroying me, destroying us, and to make it a gesture of love.Â
Forgiving Christophe is not my main concern. In any case, heâs the only one who could offer forgiveness to himself. My main concern is to live my life in the most alive manner as can be, with, around me, my family and the people I love, and who are themselves the most alive as can be.â
Iâve linked the interview already in the past, but since you asked for the source and in case youâre curious to know more, you can find the full interview HERE.Â
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