## it's hard to breathe .

“ah,” a ghost of a curse is at the tip of his tongue, bitten away as he rubs sunscreen carefully across his nose and around his eyes. “well, it can’t get worse, right?” he laughs, knowing in the back of his mind that his mom would definitely tell him that it can and probably will get worse the longer they’re out in the sun. jino sucks in his teeth, “okay, let’s not jinx that.”

"It could always get worse..." He states matter-of-factly with a deadpan expression, which he doesn't hold as he proceeds to laugh boisterously. Simply by hanging out with Jino, his spirits were lightening up and he was beginning to feel like himself. He would extend the sentiment to the Sun too. He couldn't recall enjoying himself this much outside, but he would have to wait until the end of the session to see if he felt the same way then. "Let's not."

“ah, good question.” jino muses, instantly tugging at his backpack to rummage through its contents despite knowing that he had not packed sunscreen when he had tossed his necessities into the bag that morning. "and i've got nothing," their savior comes at the hands of their instructor for whom jino’s mom would forever be grateful for because jino would never remember to put sunscreen on — twenty-three years later and jino decided it was too late to change this fact. 

"It might be too late for that..." He delivers the news with a comical expression on his half, and a smile repressed from finding the situation comical albeit worrisome. However, the instructor saved them from coming out looking like lobsters, and that was a small victory for the two of them. He tosses the small tube of sunscreen towards his friend, shifting his attention to the pictures of previous instruction sessions. Some people look worse for wear, but he was hoping that he would end up on the other side of the spectrum. "But at least it's not a goggles tan. Now those are hilarious!"

its something that surprises him -- that makes his ears tint with the faintest shade of pink and he tries to hide the smile that wants to form on already upturned lips. acting had been something he's been wanting to get into, but of course, he had other things to attend to. now that things were... 'calmer' in a way, he was hoping he could expand in that avenue, and he was glad it didn't seem outlandish.

"Hey, don't say that out-loud, or you'll start believing it. If I say you're charming, I genuinely think that you are." He states firmly, maintaining eye-contact with the man far longer than he should and forcing his eyes to round out into a comical expression. He blinks, facing ahead to admire the people laid out on blankets on the grass. "But I suppose being humble about it gives you another notch." His tone shifts to a teasing kind, smile forming naturally when he spots a toddler chasing a bird.

he should have been surprised by their pick, but when he truly thought about it, it seemed right on brand for the company they were under-- always pushing, evolving, wanting to stretch muscles that could probably use it. jasper wasn't the best dancer in the group, which was exactly why he had gotten bounce. the performance part wasn't the hard part of it, nor was the singing. but the rapping, dancing, and putting it all together? that had taken some practice, and by some, he means hours of staring at himself in the mirror, making sure angles were right. so its safe to say that a break was more than warranted.

"I could actually see you acting..." He voices out loud, eyebrow quirking with curiosity at what roles would be a good match for Jasper. Although, the point of acting was to take up roles that weren't typecast, and he knew that the man beside him would absolutely enjoy the challenge regardless. He had his own experience in acting in short series, and even had a cameo role once, but he was looking for more roles behind the scenes at the moment. "I hope that you do get the chance to go after a role, or if you voice it often enough, someone is bound to offer you a role too?"

he thinks the only time he's gotten to really enjoy the sun, really absorb the necessary vitamin d was the first thing in the morning, taking a deep breath before the other members wake and they were back to doing normal schedules. other than that, with all the promoting they were doing, the only other time he got to really enjoy it was when he was going from building to the van-- though he's not sure that with all the cameras and screams it really counted. the rare breath they had in between all the busy things they were up to had him going outside with noeul. he was going to take advantage of the fact spring had actually come.

He softly laughs at Jasper's confession, but the amusement was directly mostly towards himself. He had completely underestimated his members' exhaustion, but the young man especially had managed to mask it so gracefully. It made him realize that he should act in a more supportive role and be more present for their promotions. He could still turn things around, and be present with Jasper.

he's never quite sure how to react to some of the younger idols in the company. or well, technically not in the company, but in a sister company of sorts. in general, he's never sure what to say or how to act around younger idols in general because in his mind, he's still a rookie idol. it's weird to think that he isn't.

"You're probably right, hm?" He nods his head respectfully at the man's response, holding himself back from being upfront about his stubborn ideology. His own reputation could remain hidden in front of the senior artist. He twists the cap, downing half of the liquid content in one go. Truly nothing was better than cold water after rounds of run throughs of a choreography. He refrains from touching his hair, wanting to avoid the styling chair for the remainder of the shoot. "I am curious about something..."

— cinnamon shake

While Noeul had been pleasantly surprised by the special project, he was more appreciative that the MZSD members had been invited to join and that their schedule had even allowed them to do it in the first place. His group was preparing for an unconventional comeback, and this brief project felt like the first time in a long time that he could enjoy himself from start to finish. He couldn't recall the last time he had properly felt free of the self-imposed pressure, and bound by his responsibility over the group's success.

his mouth opens, and then closes, a breath of laughter leaving him as he nods in a bit of resignations. he knew that wasn't quite fair of him to judge. to him, the guys had worked so hard-- but he had been counting himself out. always the perfectionist he was, there always seemed to be something he had to be worked towards, to improve. he couldn't just be-- and maybe that was the problem.

"My sister had one of those spinning dolls that shoot up in the air, and that is exactly how I am picturing the both of us. One after the other, but if one of us bumps into the other, wouldn't the spiraling have to stop?" At this rate, the man seated across from him was used to his ramblings. Perhaps, it was a sign that he was finally getting comfortable in this retreat. Such a shame that it happened towards the end, but he would definitely pin this conversation as one of the highlights of their stay there. "I know what you're saying about it being a break. I might feel different when the time comes, and it will be what I need when I'm at that point in my life."

he finds himself shrugging. "i know nutcases, i highly doubt you qualify mate." he offers truthfully. his family had plenty of them for sure, but he watches carefully instead, and then he offers a listening ear. he nodded because he could agree when it came to the finish line thing. "i feel like we're already trying to reach for something before we've accomplished the first thing we're going for. there is always something. we can't... rest." he finds himself frowning a bit, realizing he's never said it out loud before and hums, moving to finish off his bottle.

"So, you're saying I haven't gotten there, yet?" He questions with a tilt of his head, amused expression lingering on his lips. It was comforting that the man wouldn't fully judge him for his unfiltered thoughts. He always felt uncomfortable relieving his own thoughts, knowing that it could be burdensome for the other person. It was even harder for him to disclose them to family, or close friends. "There is still room for me to spiral into absolute madness." He comments, crossing his arms over his chest. Ugh, why was he so uncomfortable? "I don't even think I'll be able to rest when we get an actual break."

if there was a person that truly understood where he was coming from, he knew it'd be noeul. he was sure the guy had been at legacy far longer than he had, and he had the experience, and more importantly the talent to back it up. it was nice not having to practice in order to get to know him more, and plus... having a bit of liquor in his sytem certainly helped things in the same vein. so he offers a big grin, his eyes dancing as he takes a sip of his beer with a nod. "why is that? you didn't want a break?" he questions, now curious about it.

"I don't want to sound like a nutcase." He lightly scratches his cheek, stopping immediately when he realizes that he shouldn't be touching his face. He holds onto the neck of the beer bottle instead, playing with the label wrapped around the base. "I've always been the type to focus on the metaphorical finish line, but it was difficult for me to come to terms that there was no finish line in this industry, at least not what I had in mind." He had these conversations before with his other friends, but it felt nice to speak openly to a member of his own group. He had come to realize that it was far more difficult to be openly vulnerable the older he became.