glitter pink cherry-scented garbage

Shen Yuan and Luo Binghe wake up in a field somewhere far, far away with no memory of how they got there or who they are, but they get one look at each other and come to the conclusion they must have been important to each other- husbands maybe?

Insert some time passing where they wander around, realize some things about themselves (like, whoa! They're really strong? They have swords! Binghe can heal really fast! Binghe...can actually do some freaky things with his blood? Shen Yuan is *fascinated*. Also, Shen Yuan doesn't have to eat? Or, well, he does sometimes. He's also sick? Maybe??) And basically fall in love all over again.

And they get domestic *so* fast. It's a record. They build a home in the middle of nowhere, wander their 'territory', fight together in spars and against beasts, and share tender moments of sweet sweet bonding-

And also very clumsy sex.

Look, what do you think these two are gonna do? They're sparkling clean virgins with no idea sex is even a thing. At best they figure out if they do this, stuff feels real nice, and they like doing it together. They probably only found out on *accident* and then Shen Yuan decided to be curious and experiment with it. Binghe, of course, goes along happily.

Disciple: Head Disciple Shen should watch who he associates with. I've heard that Shen Jiu has been going behind the sects back to fuck whores

Shen Yuan: Well if Shen-shidi is fucking your mother, then maybe she'll end up giving birth to a better son!

Wei Wuxian: I threatened to reveal his dark secret.

Jiang Cheng: What's the dark secret?

When Luo Binghe spots Shen Qingqiu in Jin Lang city he’s absolutely shocked to discover a mere 2 or 3 (how much was it) years left on Shizun’s counter. What had happened in the time he was gone? Did without a cure get worse? Was it something else?

Worried to pieces he hurries over to his master. Except once said master lays eyes upon him—while outwardly calm—his counter starts to glitch showing only minutes left, then seconds, then months, zero, seconds again and so on.