chrissy is Massive

do i got any hoes in ireland or scotland or even manchester

My ford got a hydrolic module with a jumping bean in it

bro are drivers insane? That's like the second car-related post on Tumblr with the amount of hatred literally not seen under any other type of post ever

Yeah the jumping bean makes the car jump over/across

Road rage is so bad because it's the same rage anyone would feel at a computer working wrong, (slow internet, program not doing what you want, whatever), but it raises the stakes to "possibly literally life or death".

Basically it works by containing the power of the mexigan jumping bean to fire the cylanders inside of the wheel hydraulics and create a massive jumping force

If you dont want me pit maneuvering you out the way then get out the way. I dont say this a lot but i am willing to kill to get to my destination half a minute sooner

Just a quick update for you all somebody fucked my car earlier this week they fucked the jumping bean to death thru the exhaust pipe and I need prosecution

Ford dealer told me to go fuck my self upside the head and well most of my body is my head plus another jumpingbean will cost me most of my chatturbate money

No midroll ads and it’s just a polite man playing hitman with meditative music in the background this is actually just insane enough to be my new favorite thing to fall asleep to

“Now I will drop this man here and quietly snap his neck. The Mackerel claims its first victim” okay I’m here for life.

come on😀mention my favourite character😀i am well adjusted😀and will act very normal😀i assure you😀

Your friend’s unpublished fic idea is kind of a dead wife

i also want to read this guy’s dead wife

i've got the kind of eyebags that make people in movies say 'you look like hell, detective. go home.'

whats everyones favorite cocktails. i totally adore a sex on the beach. no rum and coke okay i want your favorite gay ass colorful fruity tasting type of drink okay? okay. i trust you. i love you

I love when someone is explaining instructions to a group I’m in and they look at me and it reminds them to say something about using preferred names/pronouns or that there’s vegan food options available. I go by my given name/pronouns and I’m not vegan but I’m proud that I can provide this service