I took the book back from him, handling it with considerably more care than I afforded his defence of French hygiene, and placed it neatly atop the stack before reaching for another. Art and Psychoanalysis by Laurie Schneider Adams. I had read it several times already, though it was one of those texts I found myself returning to periodically, partly because Adams had a useful habit of making the uncomfortable relationship between image, artist and unconscious impulse feel almost forensic. Appropriate company, under the circumstances.
I opened it somewhere near the middle and settled back into the chair, giving the impression that the question of whether Lestat de Lioncourt personally smelled offensive was considerably less intellectually compelling than the psychoanalytic interpretation of visual culture. Which, to be fair, it was.
I paid very little attention to the French vampire and his impassioned defence against being considered an assault to the nostrils. Or, rather, I made a point of appearing not to. There was a distinction. Lestat struck me as someone profoundly accustomed to being observed. More than that, he expected reaction. Fear, fascination, irritation, attraction, outrage. It hardly mattered which, so long as the room bent towards him eventually.
âCedar and oud,â I repeated thoughtfully, as though filing the information away for some future paper. âMuch better than damp crypt, admittedly.â I said thumbing another page.Â
I peered up at him over the edge of the book at Do you always insult potentially dangerous vampires while giving them lectures about sexâŚ, one eyebrow lifting almost involuntarily. There was something rather satisfying about watching a creature with several centuries of cultivated theatricality apparently lose his footing over garlic and aphrodisiacs.
âYouâre the one who sat down in front of me. Youâre the one who decided to irritate the Talamasca, which, by the way, you are wrong on both fronts.â I closed the book around one finger to hold my place, giving him the courtesy of my full attention now. âFirst, I do not find you irritating. That would require a formed opinion, and considerably more energy than I have presently devoted to forming one.â
Irritation implied investment. It meant he had managed to occupy enough space in my thoughts to become inconvenient, and I was not about to hand him that particular victory simply because he had decided to install himself in the chair opposite me and make a performance of existing.
âLastly, I am not Talamasca. Not fully, at least. Iâm a contractor.â I offered him a cheeky smile, the sort that probably did very little to support the argument that I had no opinion of him whatsoever.âYou seem flustered. Was it the sex or the garlic that did it?â
I found myself rather invested in studying his posture. There was an ease to the way he occupied space that felt almost too complete to be accidental. No hesitation, no visible self-consciousness, no small betrayals of uncertainty in the shoulders or hands. He seemed entirely comfortable in himself, or at least extraordinarily skilled at performing the illusion of it. Whether that confidence was learned, genuine, or simply another consequence of the vampiric condition remained to be seen. Immortality must do peculiar things to one's relationship with embarrassment. After several centuries, perhaps shame simply became inefficient.
What was it the kids said? Fake it until you make it? That seemed to be Lestat in a nutshell.
Except I suspected he had been faking it for so long that the performance and the man had become impossible to separate. There was something psychologically fascinating about that. Confidence repeated often enough became identity. Theatre performed without interruption eventually ceased to feel like theatre at all. And Lestat was nothing if not theatrical.
Still, I could not deny that it made his charm nearly impossible to resist. Not because he was attempting to be charming in any conventional sense, but because there was something magnetic in the sheer certainty with which he existed. He behaved as though every room naturally belonged to him and everyone within it had simply not yet realised.
It was obnoxious. It was also, regrettably, effective.
âYou are the reason our manuals are updated annually, but no, we do not receive a complimentary copy of The Collected Misadventures of Lestat de Lioncourt upon joining.â I shifted the book slightly in my hands, allowing the faintest curl of amusement to touch my mouth. âI have not yet been lucky enough to see your actual file. I imagine it is extensive, though. Probably requires its own shelving system.â
There were centuries to account for, after all. Centuries of appearances, disappearances, catastrophes, reinventions and, judging by the man currently occupying the chair opposite me as though he had been personally commissioned for it, a truly exhausting quantity of personality.
My gaze narrowed slightly. âWhy are you here, anyway?â
That was the considerably more interesting question. Lestat did not strike me as the sort of creature who wandered accidentally into Talamasca territory. Curiosity, perhaps. Boredom, almost certainly. But boredom in an immortal was rarely benign. Give a human being a free afternoon and they reorganised a cupboard. Give Lestat several hours without adequate stimulation and I suspected somebody eventually had to update an incident report.
Then he asked for my name. I was fairly certain my eyebrows climbed halfway towards my hairline. For a moment I seriously considered refusing. There was something satisfying about the asymmetry of it. I knew who he was. Everyone in this building knew who he was. His name had been recorded, cross-referenced, annotated and probably underlined several times by increasingly irritated archivists, while I remained simply the woman with the book and the apparent vendetta against terrestrial molluscs.
I considered giving him a false name instead. Something aggressively ordinary. Sarah. Jane. Perhaps Margaret, purely because I enjoyed the idea of Lestat de Lioncourt leaving this encounter believing he had been psychologically dissected by a woman named Margaret.
But then he mentioned levelling the playing field. A hint of mischief pulled at my expression. Oh. He wanted my name? Very well.
I closed the book fully and cleared my throat. But when I spoke, I did not give him the neat, Anglicised version. I abandoned the carefully moderated academic cadence I had accumulated through lecture halls, archives and too many years spent teaching people not to ask me to repeat myself. The softened vowels went with it. So did the tidy consonants of the English version of my name. What replaced them was older. Highland. The accent I had learned before I ever understood that accents could be edited for other people's convenience.
âIs mise RuadhĂĄn Ruarach.â
I let the Gaelic settle between us without translating it, watching him with an expression that was entirely too pleased with itself. Then, because apparently I was incapable of leaving dignity well enough alone: âAgus tha grĂ in mhòr agam air seilcheagan. Gu mòr.â
There. He had asked for my name. I had even provided supplementary biographical information. Albeit, in a language I was sure he didnât understand.
I watched his expression carefully, more interested in the reaction than I probably ought to have been. There was always something revealing in the fraction of a second before a person decided what face they wanted the world to see. Amusement, irritation, calculation. Whatever came first was usually more useful than whatever followed.
Then his knee struck the underside of the table. Every pen I had arranged beside my notes jumped at once. For one absurd second, I simply stared as they rolled in different directions across the polished wood, my carefully ordered little collection abandoning formation with all the discipline of frightened cavalry. One disappeared over the edge nearest me. Another spun lazily towards the centre before following it, striking the marble floor with a sharp click that carried much further through the library than something so small had any right to.
I looked back at him. There was no possible way I was giving him the satisfaction of asking whether that had been deliberate. The lower archive reading room had been quiet enough before he arrived that I had been able to hear the faint hum of the overhead LEDs and the occasional distant movement of someone several shelves away. Now the sound of my pens hitting the floor seemed almost ceremonial. Somewhere in the Talamascaâs long institutional history, there was probably an obscure regulation about maintaining scholarly decorum in restricted collections.
Still, I made no immediate move to retrieve them. Instead, I watched him straighten his shirt and rearrange himself in the chair with that infuriatingly effortless composure of his. Everything about him suggested performance, but not necessarily falseness. Then came the grin. The canines were deliberate. Of course they were. My gaze flicked towards them for the briefest moment before returning to his eyes.
Unfortunately for him, years spent in archives had given me an unreasonable tolerance for difficult things. I leaned back slightly in my chair, leaving the pens where they had fallen.
âI have the patience of a saint, clearly.â The corner of my mouth twitched. Whether I meant a canonised saint or one of the early martyrs currently felt negotiable.