Thieve's Gambit.

“First of all, hello to you, too. And second, you live here? You own this place?” 

“Yeah, I totally own this place. I stay in this huge master bedroom with a california king bed. You wanna see?” 

“So, what’s happening here? Where can I find Charles Xavier? I’m sorry for crashing the party, but it’s really important. Can you help me?”

“I’m not exactly sure where Charles is....but I do know where my bedromm is...if that means anything to you.” 

“Shush, shush.  I’m hiding from the rest of the party,” Wanda said, looking around before sitting down and pouring a much-too-full glass of wine.  “How’d you know?”

“Ye can’ hide this is yer party! Ye brought this upon on us!” he said with a chuckle, finishing off what seemed to be at least his fourth glass of wine. “Well I was the witness of course, ye know signin’ the party and junk.” 

“Ye do know I’m not a bartender righ...?” Remy asked glancing around. “This jus’ happens to be my own lil’ collection of alcohol. Why should I give ye some? Yer always mean ta me lately!” 

“You’re such a flirt, Mr– What do I call you?” she handed the man his shirt back, tired of having to avoid looking at him. “Cover yourself now. I’m a lady and your body is making me think bad thoughts. Where’s Nawlins exactly?” 

“Ye can call me Remy. What ‘bout ye, what do I call ye?” he asked slipping the shirt back over his head. “Oh really? What kinda thoughts? Nawlins is in Louisiana!” 

“That makes me feel less cute. Where am I supposed to sit? Do you do this a lot? Where are you from? You have an accent. I hope it’s not rude of me to point that out.” 

“Well I mean, I actually meant it when I said it to you.” he said, giving her a wink. “Jus’....stand fer a minute? I’m almost done! I don’ do this much at all actually, I don’ drive much myself. Well I’m orginally from ‘Nawlins. Nah, it ain’t rude at all.” 

“Even if I were a killer, I wouldn’t kill you after you just called me cute.” She nodded in response but tried to avoid eye contact- at least eye contact with his body. She put his shirt over her shoulder and rolled the spare tire to him. “Do you need anything else?” she asked, looking up to the sky, regretting her shirt suggestion. 

“Well I know what I gotta call everyone from now not ta die.” he looked up at her giving her a broad smile. “Nah jus’ sit there and look pretty, I’ll be done in jus’ a sec.”

“I suppose you’re right. Lots of people have powers these days, but you don’t have to worry. I’m a human girl.” she stared at the man’s naked torso for far too long and averted her gaze to the road instead. “It smells good. What cologne do you use?” she asked after catching a whiff of his shirt, but still staring off into nothing. 

“Good I wouldn’ wanna be murdered or nothin’ by such a cute girl.” he worked at the tire, eventually getting it off before looking back up at her. “I don’ know? Polo Black I think. Can ye roll that tire ta me?” he asked pointing to the spare.

“What are you doing?”

“I’m jus’ chillin’, what are ye doin’?” 

Hayley stepped out of the car after realizing the man was harmless, standing next to him with her arms crossed. “Do I look like I could kill you? And you should take your shirt off or you’re gonna get grease all over it.” 

“I don’ know!? Ye never know this day’s ye could have a power ta kill everyone named Remy or somethin’” he nodded his head at her words, removing his shirt. “Will ye hold on ta that while I work?” he asked tossing the shirt to her and beginning to change the tire.

“Pop your trunk. That would be a good sex euphemism.” she joked before popping the trunk open. “What are you doing in the middle of nowhere? I can give you a ride after you’re done changing the tire, if you promise not to kill me.” 

“Nah I jus’ met ye, I won’ throw those out jus’ yet.” he joked in return, walking to the trunk and pulling the spare tire and tools from the back. “I promise I won’, I’m not much of the killin’ type but ye gotta promise ye won’ kill me too.” 

“Do you want an honest answer? And can you do it with me still in the car?” 

“Ye keep talkin’ like that and yer gonna hurt my feelin’s.” he said with a chuckle. “I can but ye gotta pop yer trunk for me.” 

lebeaudude

“Of course I can change a tire! What do ye take me for, some kinda slouch?”

“Wait!

Remy stooped and glanced down at the girl and gave a light chuckle. “Here I ‘ll let ye grab it so I don’ break it or nothin’.” he said stooping down and tilting his head towards her. “Can ye see it?”

“Weeds are flowers, too, once you get to know them.”

“Name’s Remy, who are ye?”