Leander

Nah i don't mind him.....but there is this one time he ruined all my fun and threatened to tell mommy about it. That was not cool... :(

What exactly were you doing, Leander?

You can't make me tell you! And I was promised that if I stopped, everyone there would be sworn to secrecy.

I am your mother and i need to know if you were doing something potentially dangerous. If you tell me i wont be mad

Mommy, I know you're scary to others , but I never thought you’d do this to me. That’s so mean!

I’m not British. Do you need me to say fuck more to prove it?

Not sure if I mind

Do you prefer it in verb form?

I think learning things in school just makes me see stuff I shouldn’t. If I were ever asked, I’d probably agree that kids should just drop out of school.

Nah i don't mind him.....but there is this one time he ruined all my fun and threatened to tell mommy about it. That was not cool... :(

What exactly were you doing, Leander?

You can't make me tell you! And I was promised that if I stopped, everyone there would be sworn to secrecy.

Nah i don't mind him.....but there is this one time he ruined all my fun and threatened to tell mommy about it. That was not cool... :(

wow...you look so pretty! Don't worry I can totally be here. My mommy is somewhere in the crowd. And uncle is like the literally groom so I'm save

Aww you're so sweet, thank you! Make sure you stay safe and avoid anything that looks like trouble. If you need anything, you come and tell me, okay?

I will! Are you going to my new aunt then? Because I would have to give you extra many hugs to make up for all the time I didn't know you

Would you like me to be your aunt? Because I'd love to be your aunt, and I'd also love to have lots and lots of hugs from you

mommy almost never finds out! pinky promise. But everyone anyway always falls for my cuteness. I have the best puppy dog eyes.

wow...you look so pretty! Don't worry I can totally be here. My mommy is somewhere in the crowd. And uncle is like the literally groom so I'm save

Aww you're so sweet, thank you! Make sure you stay safe and avoid anything that looks like trouble. If you need anything, you come and tell me, okay?

I will! Are you going to my new aunt then? Because I would have to give you extra many hugs to make up for all the time I didn't know you

Would you like me to be your aunt? Because I'd love to be your aunt, and I'd also love to have lots and lots of hugs from you

wow...you look so pretty! Don't worry I can totally be here. My mommy is somewhere in the crowd. And uncle is like the literally groom so I'm save

Aww you're so sweet, thank you! Make sure you stay safe and avoid anything that looks like trouble. If you need anything, you come and tell me, okay?

I will! Are you going to my new aunt then? Because I would have to give you extra many hugs to make up for all the time I didn't know you

wow...you look so pretty! Don't worry I can totally be here. My mommy is somewhere in the crowd. And uncle is like the literally groom so I'm save

Oh, hello....grandma?

a psa to everyone simping on my SEVEN YEAR OLD son: get the fuck away from me and my family before I stick a letter opener through your stomach.

You heard the woman, leave the baby alone you NONCE, he is SEVEN

that makes me old enough not to be called a baby

I had my own apartment and career when your mother was pregnant with you, you’re a baby by my dinosaur standards

fine... not that it makes it better, though