Mi Guia

I just got on facebook and saw something that I would have shared with you. I dont want to see another meme. I dont want to think of making you laugh and being happy. You said wait a few days and see how I feel. Guess what? Im going to feel like crap still, heart-broken, and wishing you hadnt done this. And I need to accept that you’re not going to change your mind or at least not in a strong enough way that right now convinces me that you wouldn’t do this again in a month. I miss you.  I feel like you loved me but I also feel like you put on an act. I hate that right now you’re talking to your friends, mostly female about how you feel. It makes me jealous because you are opening up to them right now in a way you kept forgetting to do with me. So those friendships grow while I shrivel up. I wish you hadn’t done this. I wish you had talked to me and were open to loving me. You put a limit to it in your mind and actions instead and thats what hurts. I wasnt worth trying, or maybe you did try but not to the end. It would have been beautiful. Beautiful to grow with you, keep laughing and figuring things out. Live with you and our sloth and hippo dolls. Its a shitty long haul game but I was there for it. Now Im alone again, sad, unmotivated. I dont see the point because youve already left and arent looking back.