Lady Fyre Femdom

Taxes for the Self-Employed in the United States

I am not an accountant. I have 8 years of experience as a self-employed individual & as a business owner. I just really like this stuff. The following information is collected from various pages on the IRS website & other sources. For your reference, I have included links to all of my sources. The explanations contained in this article are simplified and may not apply to you. Read the articles & consult with an accountant. In fact, I recommend that everyone use a CPA to do their taxes. If you want to do your own taxes, make sure to do your research.

  Do I have to file a tax return? And what are these 1099s?

https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employed/self-employed-individuals-tax-center#Obligations

Self-employed individuals receive a (or several) 1099-MISC form(s) in January & February. 1099s are a company’s way of reporting your income to the IRS. They can be issued for a variety of reasons, but the most common reason is that you earned income from a company for performing contractor services. Whether you did web camming, sold clips, sold paid social media subscriptions, or made porn for another company, you are usually classified as an independent contractor.

If you make at least $600 from any one company or individual, the company or individual is supposed to issue you a 1099. However, if you have a business (specifically an LLC with a S or C certification), the person or company is not required to send you a 1099. Even if they’re not required to send you a 1099, some companies may choose to send it anyway. Even if you do not receive a 1099 from a company, you must still report the income* if you meet the requirements below:

If you make at least $400 net from all self-employment income, you must file a tax return & report the income. Net = gross income – expenses

If you make less than $400 self-employment income, you must still file a return if you meet any of the other requirements listed here: https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/i1040gi.pdf

Am I required to send 1099s to people I paid?

https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employed/am-i-required-to-file-a-form-1099-or-other-information-return

https://www.irs.gov/newsroom/understanding-employee-vs-contractor-designation

The most common situation in this industry is that in which a company or individual pays another individual for a service. If the person you’re paying is an independent contractor (does not meet the requirements to be considered an employee), and you pay that person $600 or more in a calendar year, then you must send a 1099. If that person performed the work for you under an LLC with no other classifications, you must send a 1099. If that person performed the work for you as an S-corp or C-corp (an LLC with an additional tax classification), you are not required to submit a 1099 for that person.

Ex: If you hire someone to do custom clips with you & pay them at least $600, then you’re supposed to submit a 1099 for them. However, if that person has an S-corp or C-corp, you don’t have to send a 1099.

Note: Most companies that help you with filling out & filing 1099s will charge you per person, so it would be to your advantage to not issue 1099s when you don’t have to.

https://www.thebalancesmb.com/filing-form-1096-397967

If you submit 1099s by mail, you must also include a Form 1096 which is a summary of all 1099s. You don’t have to submit this if you e-filed your 1099s. But you may need to submit a 1096 for state taxes. https://www.thebalance.com/state-tax-web-sites-3193299?_ga=2.93993117.1837848505.1549397359-1864679335.1549397359

How do I get the information necessary to file a 1099 for someone I paid?

https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/fw9.pdf

If you are paying someone & you expect to pay that person at least $600 in a calendar year, have them fill out a W-9. The information they report on the W-9 is the information you use when submitting a 1099.

What are these other 1099s I got that aren’t 1099-MISC?

1099-DIV is for dividends, distributions, capital gains, and federal income tax withheld from investment accounts

1099-H for Health Coverage Tax Credit

1099-INT reports interest income you earned on investments and bank accounts

1099-K must be filed if you have at least 200 transactions & at least $20,000 in sales from third-party payment processors such as Paypal and Google Checkout. This is also issued by credit card payment processors.

Most of these forms do not need to be submitted with your returns. You only need to send your 1099-MISC if federal taxes were withheld (and that’s rare).

What is a 1098 and why did I receive one?

A 1098 is used to report interest paid on student loans and mortgages, and paid college tuition.

What forms do I need to mail in if I’m filing by mail?

https://ttlc.intuit.com/questions/3021165-what-forms-do-i-need-to-include-on-my-1040-mail-in

Your 1040 goes on top, then any schedules and supporting documents go behind that, ordered in the same order the information appears on your 1040. If you have a W-2, that goes on top of the 1040.

In addition to schedules, you typically only need to send in documents which show income tax withheld.

Deductions

https://turbotax.intuit.com/tax-tips/self-employment-taxes/tax-reform-changes-for-self-employed-businesses/L4OoLLhqR

https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employed/deducting-business-expenses

In 2017, some new laws were passed which affect self-employed individuals’ 2018 returns. You may now be allowed to take a deduction of up to 20% on your net income if you are a sole-proprietor, member of an LLC, partner in a partnership, or a shareholder in an S-corp. C-corps are not included.

This deduction is limited to 20% of the lesser of: net qualified business income or taxable income before the deduction. It will only reduce your income on your federal return and does not apply to self-employment tax. (You figure that separately.)

What does this mean? Most people will find that their taxes are lower. There are of course exceptions.

Contrary to rumors circulating, you can still claim all qualified business expenses on your 2018 taxes. Some people were confused about this. The new law eliminates deductions for unreimbursed business expenses of employees, but this does not affect self-employed individuals’ business-related deductions. And even if you are a wage-earner, this only affects you if you itemize your deductions on your personal return. Since the standard deduction for a single individual has increased from $6,350 to $12,000 for 2018 (and similarly for other filing classifications), approximately 50% fewer people will be itemizing in 2019 anyway.

https://www.fidelity.com/viewpoints/personal-finance/how-has-tax-reform-changed-deductions

Meals and Entertainment Deduction: https://www.irs.gov/newsroom/irs-issues-guidance-on-tax-cuts-and-jobs-act-changes-on-business-expense-deductions-for-meals-entertainment

https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-drop/n-18-76.pdf

Some of us were waiting with bated breath for the IRS to issue guidelines. The good news is that you’re still allowed a 50% deduction for business-related meals. The bad news is that deductions for entertainment are no longer allowed. You can still deduct meals that are purchased during but separate from entertainment. (Ex: Baseball tickets are not deductible, but hotdogs bought at the game are. If the tickets included food, no part of the ticket is deductible.) You, or an employee, must be present during the furnishing of the meal, and it must be furnished to a current or potential employee (or, in this case, a person with whom you’re doing business). Be sure to read all of the IRS’ current rules.

You can deduct your meal expenses in one of two ways:

50% of the standard allowance, which is $51 per person per day, and varies depending on location. https://www.gsa.gov/travel/plan-book/per-diem-rates/mie-breakdown

50% of the actual meal expenses, which cannot be extravagant

Travel Expenses Deduction: https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/p463.pdf(disregard portion relating to entertainment)

  In order to deduct an expense for travel, you must be required to sleep away from your home (or your “tax home”). You can deduct travel fare (airfare, bus tickets, etc.), taxis, dry cleaning, laundry, baggage, lodging, meals & tips.

All of these expenses are claimed at 100%, except for meals, which are claimed at 50%. The same rules apply to meals expensed during travel as regular business-related meal expenses.

If you are traveling for work but extend your trip for personal reasons or use a portion of your trip as a vacation, you can only deduct expenses related to the business portion of your trip. If your trip is primarily personal but you do business while traveling, none of the expenses are deductible except for those specifically & entirely related to business.

https://www.irs.gov/publications/p463#en_US_2017_publink100033930

If you take a family member or friend with you, those expenses are not deductible unless that person is also your business partner or has a bona fide reason to be traveling with you. You may claim travel expenses for a “business associate” (employee, a person with a bona fide business purpose for travel, or you would be otherwise allowed to deduct their travel expenses). “Bona fide business purpose” means that you can prove a real business purpose for the individual’s presence, and “incidental services” (typing notes, entertaining customers) doesn’t count.

Home Office Deduction: https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employed/home-office-deduction

https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employed/simplified-option-for-home-office-deduction

https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/i8829.pdf

https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-drop/rp-13-13.pdf

If you work out of your home and it is your primary place of doing business, or if you use your home to store supplies for your business, or if you use your home to meet clients, you may qualify for a home office deduction. You can figure only a portion of a room used for business if only a portion of that room is used.  You can also deduct for use of a free-standing structure, such as a studio, if you use it regularly & exclusively for business. In that case, it does not need to be your primary place of business.

There are two ways to claim the home office deduction:

If you’re using the “simplified method” you can take a “deduction for home office use of a portion of a residence allowed only if that portion is exclusively used on a regular basis for business purposes,” where that portion of the residence does not exceed 300 square feet. Using that method, you’re allowed a deduction of $5/square foot. You can also deduct things like mortgage interest and real estate taxes. Ex: The spare bedroom which you use exclusively & regularly as an office & filming space is 10’x12’. That’s 120 square feet and offers you a $600 deduction.

If you choose to use the “regular method,” you have the additional benefit of carrying over any amounts not allowable on this year’s return (maybe you’re downgrading to a smaller office this year). You’re also allowed to report your specific expenses for that space, expressed as a percentage of your overall space. Ex: You use 12% of your home for business, and thus you are allowed to deduct 12% of your rent or mortgage and are also allowed to deduct 12% of all other expenses for that space, including heat & electricity. Let’s say you pay $2000 a month for rent and $200 per month for electricity/heat. Your deduction for the year is $3,168. You must keep records.

I recommend that you pick a method & stick to it, as things get more complicated when you switch from one to the other between years. If your gross income from your business is less than your expenses, some of your deductions are limited.

Cell Phones, Internet, Computers:

https://turbotax.intuit.com/tax-tips/small-business-taxes/mobile-phones-internet-and-other-easy-tax-deductions/L8dHBvBxu

You can only deduct the purchase of a cell phone at 100% if it is used exclusively for business. The same goes for your phone bill. If the phone is also for personal use, you can deduct both the purchase & the bill at a percentage. If the item is used in a manner that is reasonable for your business, it shouldn’t be a problem, but be conservative in your deduction percentage.

Whether or not you deduct a portion of your internet/cable bill, and how much you deduct, is determined by the nature of your business and the ratio of business to personal use. This is one of those times when you need to determine how much risk you’re willing to take. My accountant told me that I should not deduct more than 50% of my internet bill. My internet bill is 50% of my cable bill. So I deduct 25% of my entire cable bill. If I have any additional personal purchases associated with either, I exclude those purchases.

This logic can also be applied to any device you purchase for business use. Are you sure you never use your laptop for checking your personal email or looking up the weather? Then you can deduct the purchase of a laptop at 100%, but be aware that a large purchase is more likely to be a red flag.

Website Expenses: https://accountants-community.intuit.com/questions/236274-what-expense-account-do-you-put-website-hosting-under

I’m including this section because shortly before wrapping up my books for the year I wondered if I should be classifying all of my website expenses in the same category. If you’re not using Quickbooks or some other bookkeeping software, or if you’re filing as a sole proprietor rather than a business entity, this might not be as relevant to you. But if you’re wondering how to classify such expenses, the article above is perfect. If your website is informational only, it should be classified as “Advertising and Promotion” but if you sell anything on your site, then the expenses associated with that site are classified as “Cost of Goods Sold” because the site directly generates income. I have two websites: one is informational (a “link dump”) and one is CoGS (a pay site), so I classify the hosting costs, registration costs, SSL certificates, etc. for the two sites differently.

If you have subscription costs associated with either type of website, you can choose to classify those expenses under “Subscriptions and Dues”.

Business Use of Car: https://www.irs.gov/tax-professionals/standard-mileage-rates

https://www.irs.gov/publications/p463#en_US_2017_publink100033930

If you have a car you use only for business, you can deduct all expenses related to owning & operating the car. If you use your personal vehicle to travel between your residence and place of business, or to attend business meetings, etc. you can claim your mileage. Some accountants will tell you that you must keep a mileage log which includes both personal & business travel.

House Wife Rule: I have no links for this section, as it’s essentially just a camgirl legend. I have only stories, passed on to me from other industry folks and from accountants, to support this outdated, misguided rule. The story goes: If a housewife would use it, you cannot deduct it. What does that mean? Simply, you’re not supposed to claim your dildos, panties and make-up. If you’ve ever done your own taxes before becoming self-employed, maybe you noticed that there’s a deduction for work-related uniforms (or items) which are required for you to do your job. Steel-toed boots, waitress aprons, and non-slip shoes are good examples.

However, it gets a bit murky when you’re talking about things like nail polish, make-up, baby wipes, dildos, rope, corsets, thongs, and lube.

When I spoke to my accountant about this, he said it’s really all about interpretation & intent. He explained that if it’s used exclusively for business, I can claim it. If it’s purchased in excessive quantities that seem unreasonable for the average tax payer, I can claim it. Examples: Make-up used exclusively for filming and the 50 pairs of expensive pantyhose I might buy in a year. Now, make-up is a touchy item. Technically, you’re not supposed to claim make-up unless it’s stage make-up, like the kind you can buy from a specialty store. My response to that is: If I spent $100 on one bottle of spray-on foundation that I would never in my right mind waste on wearing to the grocery store & which I reserve only for filming, shouldn’t I be able to claim it? That’s really up to you to decide. This is purely a risk tolerance choice. In the very unlikely event you’re audited, can you justify your deductions to the IRS? Is the risk worth the deduction? Talk to your accountant.

What forms should I file?

There used to be 3 varieties of the main tax form: 1040EZ, 1040A and 1040, but now there’s only the 1040. I’m listing only the most commonly-used forms below. You need to research & decide exactly which forms apply to your tax situation. If you’re using tax software, it will tell you which forms you need to file.

https://www.nerdwallet.com/blog/taxes/1040ez-1040a-1040-deciding-tax-form/

https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employed/which-forms-must-i-file

Schedule 1: alimony, business income, capital gains of losses, rental income, unemployment income, HAS deduction, student loan interest, retirement contributions

Schedule 3: credit for child care expenses, education credits, general business credit

Schedule 4: Self-employment tax, penalty for not having health insurance

Schedule C: This is the main form for reporting your profit and loss from your business

Schedule SE: calculates the self-employment tax.

Schedule E: This IS the 1040

LLCs:

Single-member LLC: 1040, Schedule C, E or F

1065: If you’re an LLC with more than one member

8832: If you’re an LLC but would rather file as a corporation (partnership)

If you’re either of the two classifications below, I do not recommend doing your own taxes. There are special compliance issues that affect these classifications and if you do it wrong, the government can take away your endorsements.

S-corp: 1040, 1120-S, Schedule K-1 for each shareholder

C-corp: 1040, 1120-W, Schedule K-1 for each shareholder

This is NOT a comprehensive list of forms that you might be required to file. Again, using an online tax service or a CPA is the best way to ensure that you’re submitting all required forms.

Estimated Taxes

https://www.irs.gov/businesses/small-businesses-self-employed/estimated-taxes

https://www.irs.gov/payments

You must pay estimated taxes if you are self-employed and expect to owe $1000 or more in taxes for any given year. If you are a corporation, you must pay estimated taxes if you expect to owe $500 in taxes. This number is based on your prior year’s return. Let’s say you owed $1500 in taxes last year. If this is your second time filing SE, you’re required to make estimated payments on 90% of the tax you owed last year, so in this case you would make 4 equal payments of $337.50 each ($1500 x 0.90 / 4). In some cases, you’re required to pay 100% of your prior year’s owed taxes. Use form 1040-ES to pay estimated taxes, or do it online.

Figure your estimated taxes:

Individuals: https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/f1040es.pdf

Corporations: https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/f1120w.pdf

If your income increased significantly and your deductions did not increase as well, then you’ll want to make higher payments. If this is only your second year filing, it might be a bit harder to determine what your payments should be, but it’s good to look at an overview of your income and deductions. You can also adjust your payments for future quarters if you have a really good quarter. For example, if you’ve estimated that you’ll owe $1000 per quarter but you have a really good few months, I recommend you increase your next payment to cover those extra taxes. In the case of self-employed individuals, a good rule of thumb is to save about 30% of your income every month if you owe states taxes as well, or 25% if you don’t owe state. This varies if you’re a corporation. If you have to pay B & O, you will need to save more for that. If you underestimate, make extra payments. The minimum payments required is 4, but there is no maximum.

Rules for percentage paid listed here: https://www.investopedia.com/articles/personal-finance/020316/estimated-tax-deadlines-2016.asp

The cheapest way to pay is via PayUSAtax.com using a debit card. The fee is $2.55

Deadlines

https://www.irs.gov/pub/irs-pdf/p509.pdf

January 31, 2018: Submit 1099s & 1096 to IRS

January 31, 2018: If you didn’t make your last estimated payment for 2018 & have all the documents you need to file, you can file & pay by Jan 31.

January 31, 2018: B & O Taxes (Only Washington, Ohio, and some parts of West Virginia & Kentucky) & Excise taxes due, if you’re filing yearly. Washington also collects city B & O.

April 15, 2019: Individual returns due to federal & state

April 15, 2019: Deadline for requesting a filing extension for both federal & state

March 15, 2019: S-corp returns due, along with any taxes owed

October 15, 2019: Returns due for those who received an extension on the filing deadline

April 15, 2019, June 15, 2019, September 15, 2019 and January 15, 2020: Quarterly estimated tax payments due.

Note: When you’re classified as an S-corp, your estimated tax payments are based on the amount of money that you owe from your prior year’s K-1 statement(s), adjusted for this year’s estimated income. A K-1 statement shows your “pass-thru” income. If you’re giving yourself a paycheck, you should be withholding & paying payroll taxes. The K-1 statement is your business’ net earnings for the year. Again, I don’t recommend filing S-corp taxes without a CPA.

This is a difficult topic for me. I’ve shared little pieces of my experience with a couple of people that I trust, but I’ve never told this story in its entirety. I am the type of person who, upon having a powerful experience, reflects for a long time. It’s taken me several months to sort through everything.

When I started making xxx porn, it was just Laz and me. It was 100% up to us what we wanted to film, and it was great. Then we decided to start hiring models to perform with us; we were very lucky that all the models we hired were great on set. They acted like they wanted to be there, and they all were perfectly happy to be having sex with us on camera. Even the models who hadn’t done professional porn before were complete professionals on set. It was so much fun, and each shoot was a positive experience.

That continued to be our experience for two years. I realize that we are very fortunate in that regard. I know from watching Twitter that some people don’t see the need to be kind or empathetic to their fellow performers on set and during scenes. Some don’t believe that they should maintain a certain level of enthusiasm to help their scene partners and are, quite frankly, callous in their treatment of their scene partners. We choose not to hire anyone who expresses that type of attitude. We believe that a good scene is made with the enthusiastic and informed consent of all performers, and that obtaining consent is an ongoing process throughout each scene. Enthusiasm from scene partners is just one good indication of continued consent. Kindness and empathy make for good shoots.

Unfortunately, and probably inevitably, we hired someone who does not believe as we do. Looking back, I should have recognized the signs in other scenes she did. Her lack of enthusiasm is apparent, but before hiring her, I honestly blamed the directors for the “boring” scenes. I had not noticed her expressing a poor attitude on social media, and I had no idea how little effort she put into being a good performer.

When she came to us, I was expecting an experience much like all of my previous experiences. I soon learned that was not to be the case. In our presence, she was quiet, sullen, and uncommunicative. At times, she bordered on being unfriendly. While reviewing scripts she barely acknowledged that we were speaking to her. She rolled her eyes when we tried to lighten the mood. What made it more confusing is that one minute she was helpful and even joked with us but would then quickly turn it off and behave as though she couldn’t wait to leave. Before the shoot and between scenes, she looked miserable. She wouldn’t make eye contact; she was stiff and lazy in her performance. It was clear that she didn’t want to work and put very little effort into hiding it. When she wasn’t in the room, Laz and I talked about our utter confusion and wondered how we were going to get through the whole shoot. We almost called it off.

Working with her was a horrible experience. I had to go places in my mind that I never thought I’d have to go. I had to separate my body from my mind and tell myself things like, “It’s almost over,” and “Just one more scene.” As hard as I tried to gather all my acting skills, to me, it’s painfully obvious in the footage that I didn’t know what to do. I constantly checked in with her, verbally asking her if this or that was okay and if she was doing alright. It was strained and unnatural. Throughout the entire shoot, I checked in with this performer at least four times more than anyone else I’ve ever hired, and at no point did she verbally indicate that anything was wrong. She also did not take our constant inquiries as a clue that she was behaving strangely. She was indifferent to the fact that her behavior was negatively impacting the shoot and our moods. In fact, she seemed to grow increasingly irritated at my inquiries. That irritation was a further indication to me that she was not only fully in charge of and aware of her behavior but also that she saw nothing wrong with it - or that she didn’t care. Yet there were those voices in the back of my head wondering if something was wrong; I was wondering if something negative would come out after the shoot. It was frightening.

It was a traumatic experience for me because I read stories about performers doing things on set they don’t want to do but feeling pressured to do them. I felt like I was the person doing the pressuring, even though I knew I wasn’t. I couldn’t have been more accommodating. I NEVER want to be the director who pressures someone to do something. It would absolutely break my heart. So there I was, having to maintain my composure in order to carry the scenes, while also having such conflicting feelings about the performer’s attitude and behavior. I knew she was there of her own free will, but she was consciously behaving as though she wasn’t. It was so confusing and disturbing.

We made it through and got some sub-standard content. It was upsetting to have wasted so much time and money on someone who had so little respect for us as producers and as performers. What stuck with me the most, and what changed the way I’ll work from now on, was her behavior and how I felt because of it.

After that shoot, I wanted to quit. I didn’t want to have anything to do with porn anymore. It took several days of processing that shoot to feel a little bit better about it. I wrote myself out of the next shoot I had booked. I then decided that I will not be in scenes with other women anymore unless I am sure that those women want to be doing porn. I DO realize how problematic this is. In any other job, there are lots of people who don’t want to be there, and that’s just how the world of employment works. I’ve had a couple jobs where I acted like I didn’t want to be there, and looking back on it, my bosses should’ve fired me long before I quit. The argument I’ve seen lately is “Why is sex work the only job where people are really concerned about whether the work is fulfilling to the workers? Why is that a requirement in order to say that the work is valid?” I agree with all of that. It’s a double standard. Society isn’t trying to outlaw other jobs where people use their bodies to do their labor and in which those people might not necessarily want to do those jobs or find that work fulfilling. Given this, I can’t really explain to you why having this encounter with someone who so obviously doesn’t want to be doing porn affected me the way it did. All I know is that it did. It was my body, and I felt awful using it to interact with this person. I felt trapped because really what other option did I have? I’ve seen the way that people act on social media. If I had refused to continue being in scenes with her or shoot her because of her completely unprofessional behavior, what would have happened to my reputation? I’ve gone through the BTS footage, and other than her looking really bored a lot of the time, there’s nothing there to indicate what I saw because the most-obvious sulking occurred before we started running the cameras for the day.

Maybe I’m naive. Maybe my experience is one that many others share and it’s so common that I seem melodramatic. In the big world of LA porn, there are many performers who work with people who they don’t really want to work with, and there are performers who just really don’t like their jobs. I’d never experienced it before, and it felt very bad. It felt ugly. It felt like I was adding to someone else’s pain. Some people believe the industry is just one big hungry porn machine, gobbling up broken people, chewing them up and spitting them out, more broken than they were before. But I know enough performers who love their jobs to not buy into that stigma. Intelligent, hard-working, strong-willed people. I know that together we can and will make this industry better. I really hope that the way I conduct myself on set adds to that positive change.

After much soul-searching and after watching this performer’s scenes with other companies, I’ve decided that her behavior on set had nothing to do with me. She doesn’t enjoy doing porn and she doesn’t attempt to do a good job for directors. She doesn’t try to hide how much she doesn’t want to be on set. Even the way she spoke about porn indicated this. I have gone over my behavior time and again. I have talked to others about the experience. I firmly believe that I didn’t do anything wrong. I know it in my heart. Yet I cannot shake the awful feeling that I had inside my soul, and I cannot forget the way that this performer put me in a position to have to use my body in a way that made me very uncomfortable.

I am on the “fringes” of the industry. I don’t understand even a small percentage of what performers deal with on sets or behind the scenes. Yet I am starting to understand why some people seem so jaded after being in the industry for a long time. I refuse to become jaded. I refuse to ignore the discomfort of my scene partners just to get through a shoot and to avoid being slammed on Twitter. The only thing I can do right now to make sure that I can stay a caring, empathetic human being, as well as stay completely in charge of my body and my reputation, is to write myself out of scenes for a while. In the future, when I decide to perform again, I will only be working with women who want to be, and who are enthusiastic about being, in porn. That is my choice. *I am not scheduled to be in any shoots for the rest of the year, though we have a few lovely women returning to us with whom I would feel absolutely comfortable performing. I need time. I thoroughly enjoy facilitating shoots because I can focus on making everyone feel safe, comfortable, and valued. That makes me happy. I also love filming all this sexy content! So that’s what I’ll be doing for the rest of this year, along with filming content with Laz.

I kept all of this to myself for a long time. I’ve gotten very close to posting about it, only to decide that I might be misunderstood and attacked. I am not just a performer, I’m a director as well. I hire performers, and I’m in charge of my sets. That means that I’m in a unique position where I have experiences as a performer does, but I believe most performers view me as a director and not fellow talent. I am usually silent on issues affecting performers because I know I’m seen as “other”. Yet I DO have some of the experiences performers have. I have struggled with body issues, with consent issues, with expressing myself on set, with not completely “meshing” with talent, etc… with many of the issues other performers have. Yet I feel that I need to be silent because I am in the position of director as well. I won’t pretend that I understand what it’s like to show up on someone else’s set since I’ve never been in that position. 

All I can say now is that I’m telling my personal story which I’ve thought about long and hard. It’s a story that I need to tell in order to heal and move forward. It’s a story that I can only tell through my lens, as it’s the only lens I have.

I’m writing this post because whenever I mention on Twitter that a particular comment has offended me, or that I don’t like something that was said to me, I always have at least a few guys saying that’s why they don’t interact with me. Honestly, those comments are almost as offensive because, in my mind, they imply that I’m a wildcard, getting offended at random things, and that fans have to tread carefully. On the other hand, I can’t expect you to know what my preferences are if I don’t express them. So you’ll find those preferences at the bottom of this post, spelled out very clearly. If it’s too much trouble to learn about the people with whom you’re initiating interaction, that’s totally fine, but don’t be surprised if we don’t reciprocate in a way that you find pleasing.

I put myself out in the public eye, and that means making myself vulnerable. I also realize that it’s confusing for some “fans” that I am a dominant woman but I also make xxx porn. I would love to go into why that’s confusing for people, but it’s really a deeper issue than I think can be addressed in a short blog post. Also, I’m just not going to change the world’s perception of porn “stars” in one post. It would be a pointless endeavor, and I’m not interested in wasting my time on ineffectual action.

What I can do, however, is tell you how I prefer my fans interact with me. You can either respect my wishes, or not, but know that I DO have preferences. 

Before delving into that, understand that I DO like to interact with my fans. I love, even more, to interact with actual customers who are supporting my work through purchasing the content that I make, ordering custom clips, and tributing. Customers are my patrons, and I appreciate you so much. 

Why do I mention the difference between customers and fans? I’ve offended a lot of people talking about this topic on Twitter. Guys who never buy porn really do seem to believe that I should be willing to interact with them endlessly and show how flattered I am that they are complimenting me. I even had one guy get super offended & go on a crusade to get me banned from Twitter simply because I suggested that if he was going to leave a comment on every single one of my tweets (which I have to take the time to read), that he consider purchasing ONE clip from me to show his support. The whole argument started because he posted a link to my pirated content. I didn’t even ask him to remove the post; I simply asked him to watch my porn for free on a site where I post the porn for free myself & receive a small amount of ad revenue, rather than the site to which he’d posted a link. It was mind-boggling, and yet these interactions happen more frequently than you might think. 

When I refer to “fans” vs “customers” I’m making the distinction between the people who love to watch my porn & the people who pay for my porn. The two DO overlap. This is a difficult language issue because in the portion of the porn world where models are being hired by companies to star in films, those stars seem to go after the numbers. Their fans request them for scenes, and in turn the companies might hire them back more frequently. Porn stars don’t make residual income on their scenes. They make a flat rate for a scene, and being hired for scenes is how they make their money. That’s different than someone like myself who relies on SALES on my scenes to make my income. (Yes, porn stars are too affected by sales, piracy, etc., but not as directly as those who produce their own content.) So I know a lot of fans are coming from a place where they’re all treated equally by porn stars who have no way to know who’s financially supporting the companies for whom they work. 

I, on the other hand, often know who’s finally supporting my work & who’s watching it for free but then demanding my time & attention (again, for free). 

Am I flattered that there are millions of people who watch my porn? YES. I LOVE that you guys love me. It’s awesome. I appreciate your kind words whether or not you’re paying. But the hundreds of guys who are supporting my work are the ones who hold a special place in my heart. And honestly, I can usually see a distinct difference in how “fans” interact with me vs how “customers” interact with me on social media. Fans who are customers seem to be more invested & more interested in me as a person & performer rather than just seeing me as a body getting fucked.

The guys who don’t pay for my porn tend to be a lot more crude & graphic in their comments, often disregarding my feelings. The ones who do support my work tend to be much more respectful of me as a feeling & thinking human being. Of course there are exceptions. There are plenty of men who never spend a penny on my work who are very respectful. And there are customers who get caught up in the fantasy & inadvertently offend me while trying so hard to be complimentary. However, the majority of the people who I enjoy interacting with on Twitter are those who value what I do enough to pay for it. They are the ones who are actually supporting me & whose purchases allow me to continue to do what I love so dearly. 

I guess I should get around to what I really mean to say. This topic has so many subtopics reaching into so many areas that I could go on all week, but I’ll get to the point. 

If you’re interacting with me, I have preferences. I’m a human being with feelings, and I can get offended. It’s perfectly reasonable. 

What I don’t like:

I do not EVER want to see your penis if you’re not paying to show it to me & doing it within the context of a prearranged D/s encounter. If you show it to me without my consent, that is a violation. If your genitals are in your avatar or header, or if you tweet them at me, I will block you. 

I receive dozens of messages every day from men commenting on how they want to fuck me, want me to suck their dick, or detailing what they would do to me. I find that behavior repulsive. I assure you, regardless of how good you think your dick is or how charming you think you are, I do not want to hear about it. I realize that this is often perfectly-acceptable behavior when interacting with a “porn star”. I’m telling you I don’t like it.

I also receive a lot of inquiries about how you can be in a scene with me. I am still completely baffled as to why this question is posed so frequently. There are VERY few porn stars who do “fuck a fan” contests or who allow their fans to shoot with them. Also, I’m not them. I would never do this. Plus, hello, you can clearly see that my husband is the only man I film with. I have no intention of changing that, and even if I did change it, I guarantee you will not be the person I choose to include in a scene. It’s been explained to me that some men believe I should be flattered by these comments, but I’m not. I can’t change how I feel. 

I do not want to be referred to as: bitch, slut, whore, cocksucker, thick, fat, just to name a few things. A safe rule of thumb is: If a woman doesn’t refer to herself by a certain word, don’t use it to describe her. It’s all about consent. I don’t go around referring to men with certain descriptors without their consent.  

What I will tolerate:

Though I don’t really “like” it, there are a few things I will tolerate because I realize that in the context of porn, they are generally acceptable. The one thing that comes to mind is when guys explicitly describe & compliment my genitals.

You’ll be able to tell I don’t really like it because I will ignore you. I won’t block you, but I will probably mute you, especially if you’re commenting on many tweets in such a fashion.

What I like:

I love compliments on my scenes that are a less explicit, like “Your ass is so amazing” or “I love the way you move” or “You’re so sexy.” You can tell I like the comments because I will “heart” them on Twitter or possibly even respond to or RT the comments.

Even better are compliments on the quality of my content, my sensuality, and my intellect. There’s nothing that makes me happier than a guy who can appreciate how much work I put into my scenes or how I use my intellect to make my porn more appealing. (I do realize that not everyone is attracted to a woman’s intellect.)

All that said, do I expect you to care about my preferences? NOPE. I absolutely do not expect people to care about me, what I like, or my feelings. However, as with ANY interpersonal interaction, if you want to be well-received & have the most positive experience possible, it helps to know a little about the person with whom you’re interacting. If you violate my consent, it you offend me, or if you do something that I consider to be rude, I have every right to limit or eliminate your ability to further interact with me. 

I know I can come off a bit harsh & this is a sensitive topic. I’m not completely heartless when it comes to helping newcomers or established producers. In fact, I do a lot in the community to help others find their way. I am a member of some forums where I answer questions about producing clips, and I offer suggestions to newbies. I often answer text messages from other producers who have questions. I help others stay on top of their piracy issues. I regularly check in with other producers when I’m experiencing issues on a site or have a quick question about payment methods or the like. I exchange model recommendations when I’m comfortable doing so. I even send customers to other producers who I think are better suited to their preferences.

I have not forgotten that I was once a newbie myself. I needed the guidance of other people to get over some hurdles. In fact, there are still a few producers of whom I regularly ask questions. I have not forgotten that I still have much to learn, and I will always be learning. In so many ways, I myself am still very much new to this. I am humble about that.

However, over time I’ve come to realize that the clip producer community has a lot of boundaries, and everyone must choose how much they’re willing to divulge. I’ve helped people in the past only to have them “move in” on categories that I often shoot in, and I found that it hurt my income. I know that experiences with that may vary, and that many producers are perfectly willing to train others how to shoot their fetishes. It’s nothing malicious; we ALL want to take what we’ve learned & put it into practice. That’s part of being an evolving business. Yet there is undeniably a certain amount of self-preservation involved in deciding what information to divulge.

In terms of professional providers, I’ve been lucky enough to be taught some skills & given knowledge by a few generous locals. I am so grateful, and I know my playmates are too. In turn, I’ve offered to pass these skills on to others. We also trade DNS info, I help pass along information that I hope will keep others safe. When it’s safe for me to do so, I help them promote their businesses. I co-lead a panel on STI prevention, symptoms & treatments. Though I may not often participate in community events, I love that most of the people I’ve encountered in this community are all for helping one another stay safe. I’ve also been turned down when I asked providers to train me on particular skills so that I could safely interact with others. I absolutely understand why & respect their decisions. No one owes me anything. But in my limited experience there seems to be little sense of competition between local providers because we’re all so unique in our appearance, experience, methods, comfort levels & offerings.

This is different than posting content on the internet, where customers can pull from a huge pool of producers. Yes, we’re all unique, but the internet is vast. So, let’s get to the heart of the matter. When someone who has never shot content comes to me & asks me to teach them, it’s hard to be friendly. Often these are guys or gals who watched my porn for free & have decided they too can be porn producers (because let’s be honest: anyone with a smart phone or webcam can be a porn producer). Good for them. But this isn’t a public safety matter; this is them asking me to teach them how to make money by giving them (again, for free) the knowledge that I’ve acquired over the last 7 years in the industry, plus the skills that I gained in my former professions & my 7 years of college education. If you’re asking me questions that you can find the answer to if you just do a little bit of reading, I’m not going to help you. If I seem to be guarding my knowledge closely & helping only when I want to, that’s because it’s absolutely what I’m doing.

Fans don’t always understand that making porn is a job. We love what we do, but it’s very much a full-time job. You can make some cell phone videos & try it out. But are you willing to promote your business, to develop your brand, to do the research? Are you willing to invest in some tech only to discover it’s not what you need? Are you willing to hire models knowing that while you’ll have some successes, some of your scenes will never pay off? Are you willing to stretch your limits & confront your preconceived notions? Are you willing to admit when you’re wrong & change so that you can be happy, so that you can survive? That’s what we do.

We try new things, and we spend so much time strategizing. At any given time, we’re running 10 spreadsheets of lists & data. For someone who used to hate math, I sure do a lot of math. My desk is absolutely covered in sticky notes all the time. I collect data, I crunch numbers, we turn those numbers into business strategies. We write scenes, we star in those scenes or we shoot those scenes. I post our content, I update our website. Laz handles the hiring, the editing, our social media & promotion, as well as lots of other big things that I won’t go into. We work at least 40 hours a week, often much more. So if you’re looking at us & thinking “I can do that too,” then you should know what we do.

We try to evolve as the industry changes, and we are always learning. We treat the models we hire with respect. We constantly check in with them to make sure they’re happy & feel safe, we ask them what we did right & what we can improve upon. We listen, we reach, we grow. We’re not original. We’re not the first. We’re certainly not the last. We’re just a small business trying to get by & evolve in what seems to be an oversaturated industry. We’re just a married couple who does what we can to be the happiest we can be.

Nearly everyone in my immediate family is obese (at least 100 lbs overweight). They eat unhealthy food, they don’t work out (or get any kind of physical activity really), and they have lots of health issues (Type 2 diabetes, high cholesterol, high blood pressure, etc). When I go home for a visit, I’m aghast at the number of medications each family member takes. We’re talking 10-12 medications daily. It’s been really hard for me to empathize with them over the years. I was always naturally thin when I was younger. I ate anything I wanted to & never worked out. I did suffer health problems as a result of mistreating my body. I got kidney stones frequently, I had high cholesterol & high blood pressure. But I didn’t make any changes because I only weighed 95 lbs at my heaviest. I couldn’t see the problem. I went on medications, I was sick all the time, and I didn’t listen to my husband when he tried to suggest that I should make some changes.

Once I turned 30, that all started to change for me. I noticed that what I put into my body was affecting my weight more. I was getting horrible headaches 2-5 days per week. I went to the doctor & found out that my blood pressure was upwards of 180/120. For those of you who don’t know, that’s super duper high. A doctor told me that I wasn’t allowed to work out until I was medicated because she was afraid I was going to have a stroke. Normal blood pressure is around 120/80. So I went to the cardiologist & was put on blood pressure medication. I started doing more yoga. I gave up soda & started eating better. But that still wasn’t enough.

I grew up eating very unhealthy food, and I carried that into my adult life.  It’s been a struggle for the past few years to overcome a lifetime of bad habits. Recently I decided to get serious about my health. I signed up for a training program at the gym. I was really surprised when I got my first body scan. I weighed in at 112.4 lbs & 30.9% body fat. Nearly 1/3 of my body was FAT. I couldn’t believe it. My BMI was 22.7 which is considered “normal” but isn’t honestly a very good measure of health. I didn’t feel comfortable in my body.

I went through the 6-week program at the gym, working out with a trainer 4 days per week & working out on my own 1-2 times per week. I downloaded the MyFitnessPal app, and I entered my macros (amount of fat, protein & carbs I wanted to eat each day). I was very dedicated to the program, and I only had 3 cheat days while my family was in town. 

At the end of the 5 weeks (I had to quit early due to a work obligation), I went in for my body scan again. I weighed in at 105.6 lbs & 27.3% body fat, with a BMI of 21.3. I had worked really hard to lose just a little bit of weight. Why? Because it takes A LOT of effort to lose weight. I can now empathize with my obese family members. It’s totally a matter of will-power & really really wanting it. 

I’ve had a few set-backs along the way. An injury which meant that I couldn’t work on my abs for 6+ months, time restraints because I’m a workaholic, etc. Things will continue to get in the way, but I’ve decided to make my health a priority.

Last week I decided to take my workouts a step further & purchased a MyZone workout tracker. It’s a belt that you put around your sternum during your workouts. It tracks heart rate & combines that with BMI information to give an accurate read on how many calories you burn during a workout. You can wear it all day if you want, but I choose to only wear it during workouts. 

I’ve been tracking my caloric burn for the past 6 days, and I decided to do some math. 

It takes a caloric deficit of around 3500 to burn off ONE pound of fat. That’s a lot of calories. According to my BMI, I burn 1122 calories per day just to survive & perform basic functions like respiration, circulation, digestion and thinking (yes, your brain burns calories, about 220 per day in my case). So if I did nothing but sit on the couch & watch TV for 24 hours, I would burn 1122 calories. 

At an average of 1206 calories consumed per day, I’ve consumed 7237 calories in the past 6 days. I’ve burned 2606 calories during workouts. And I’ve burned about 6732 calories just existing. That’s a caloric deficit of 2101. Remember it takes 3500 to lose a pound of fat. 

So with all the work I’ve done in the past 6 days, I’ve likely managed to only lose 0.6 lbs. Less than a pound lost for all of the dieting, carefully measuring & tracking everything I put into my mouth, refusing to eat when I’m hungry at night, working hard at the gym (4.4 hours in total), and going to one 75-minute yoga class. 

That’s A LOT of work for half a pound.

Today I have a greater appreciation for how hard it is to “get fit”. I don’t want to discourage people from trying. When you put in some effort, it snowballs. Your body becomes more efficient at burning, and the workouts get easier. I never thought I’d actually look forward to working out, and sometimes it’s still a struggle, but I’m much more motivated now. I want to see progress. When I see progress, it motivates me even more. 

Today, at 104.5 lbs, I can see the progress that I’ve made, and it’s really really worth it to me. I feel more comfortable in my own body, and I feel more confident in myself. This is a very personal, individual experience, and I don’t think that everyone needs to be fit to feel confident. But for me, it’s made a big difference.

I’m writing this blog right now when I should be doing my “month end” balancing. This is partially because I’ve developed a short attention span, and partially because I’m fed up with the emotional manipulation from “fans” via e-mail. 

Please, if you’re thinking of writing your favorite performer, domme, porn star, model, producer, cam girl... ask yourself if you’ve earned her attention. 

Yesterday I received a long-winded email from someone who asked about why I enjoy a certain fetish & who then proceeded to tell me a long story about his fetish. I skimmed the email rather than reading it, and when I didn’t see anything to indicate that there was a point to the email rather than his own emotional catharsis, I responded the same way I always do: Thanks for the contact. Part of my job is to interact with people about their fetishes, so if you’d like my attention please schedule a Skype show or contact me on my texting site. This guy wanted me to spend time reading his email, spend more time thinking about how I should best counsel him & empathize with him, then spend time explaining myself to him. All for free. All because he was brave enough to put himself out there. And he’s not alone. This isn’t an attack on one dude. I get 10-50 messages per day across various sites. Some are just dumb messages like “Hey, I wanna fuck you” aka “I wanna work with you”. But some are serious calls for free emotional investment from me. And. I’m. Not. Having. It. 

Maybe I seem like a cold-hearted bitch, and so be it, but I’m sick of this type of emotional manipulation, this appeal to my nurturing side. This appeal to the part of me which can empathize with people, their stories & their kinks. I’m sick of this expectation of free emotional labor. I’ve been reading articles for the past year about emotional labor, and honestly I thought a lot of it was bullshit. I’m learning that it’s not. I’m learning how to establish boundaries because I get exhausted, and not in the good way that one should be exhausted but fulfilled by hard work.

In this industry, women (and men too) are becoming way more available to their fans than ever before. It’s a problem. I love sharing parts of my life with you & interacting with you, but there IS a limit, and it comes at a price. People can only take so much poking & prodding, begging & emotional panhandling before they snap. Then it’s “Sorry to have bothered you on your period.” Yes, I must be on my period because I didn’t want to work for you for free.

No, I’m not mad bro. I’m a working woman, a small business owner & I’m fucking busy. If you want us all to stay sexy & positive, then stop nagging, begging & being outrageously crude. Make us WANT to interact with you. Make us look forward to logging onto Twitter & our email. Make us look forward to logging onto our cam sites.

A lot of fans have no idea what goes on behind the scenes in this industry, and honestly I only know a small portion of what models & producers deal with because I’m in a small corner of the industry. 

But let me tell you a little bit. All those porn stars putting up tons of free content on Twitter, Snapchat, etc? It’s called marketing. Sure, some are voyeurs, but if they never got booked for another shoot again, I tell you the free-flowing free content & free interaction would probably stop. They’re working you. They’re trying to get you to sign up to the sites they’re on, trying to get you to request them for shoots so they can get paid. Everyone needs to get paid. I’ve even been “worked” by models before, and I’m totally fine with that. I get it because I’m also trying to get paid. 

All those free previews Laz puts out on my Twitter? That’s called marketing. It’s not a call for you to tell me how you just came in your pants because I’m so hot. It’s not a call for you to email me to tell me how much you love me (and then, when prompted, confess you’ve never bought a clip or supported me in any other way). It’s fishing. It’s exactly what every other company in the world does. My business just happens to involve nudity, and somehow that makes some guys assume I have all the time in the world to thank them for having boners. 

Yes, I am in the business of turning men on. But my real business, the business that keeps my lights turned on & puts food in my stomach, is convincing you that seeing me and engaging in a fantasy with me is worth paying for. Maybe it’s not to you. But for the love of all things good, if you don’t think my work is worth paying for, then please don’t ask me to do additional work for you for free. Because it’s just not happening anymore. 

I have a few very loyal subs/ customers who spend a lot of money on me. They buy my pre-made clips, order custom clips, pay for Skype sessions & buy me gifts. I am so incredibly grateful for them. But I don’t have time to thank them properly because I’m so busy dealing with all the freeloaders, wading through novels in my email, skimming paragraphs to see if some guy wants to pay for my work or he’s just masturbating to his own story. I’m so busy trying to be personable. Today I want to take photos for my loyal chastity sub because he just bought me several pairs of shoes & boots. I’m trying to figure out how to schedule in some time for that between my accounting duties & filming. I’m trying to figure out how to fit in all my work duties between the hours of 7:30am & 6pm. It might happen. Maybe today will be the day. So if I don’t respond to your tweet about how much you enjoy my free porn, or your email about your traumatic childhood, please don’t take it personally. I’m spending time thanking the guy who recognizes my value, appreciates the positive influence I’ve had on his life, and shows me his appreciation with something of value. That doesn’t mean don’t interact, it just means be realistic, be respectful, and support my work if you like my work. 

I am not writing all of this to bitch & moan about how busy I am. I love being busy, and I love working hard. I don’t mind working 40-70 hours per week when I know I’m appreciated. I love how easy it is for me to fall asleep at night, often because I’ve worked hard & accomplished much. I’m writing it because there are thousands of well-intentioned men out there furiously typing away, trying to have just some kind of connection to their favorite internet personality. I GET IT. I really do. I do want to have a connection with you... I just want to be paid for my labor... like everyone else. Please respect that. Please respect all of the hard-working women & men who spend hours a day providing you with amazing, sexy content, turning you on, connecting with you, and who do understand your fetishes. Recognize that while you’re running your own small business, we’re running ours. While you’re working your 9-5 job to save for retirement, we’re trying to secure our own futures. While you’re balancing your books & answering your accountant’s emails, I’m doing the same. I’m grocery shopping, buying cat food, doing laundry, cleaning my house. I do all the mundane things that life requires, but I’m also making porn. 

A while ago I asked my fans/ customers if they have any questions for me. Unfortunately it’s taken me over a month to finally write this blog post, but I appreciate everyone sending in questions.

What’s your favorite holiday? 

It probably seems cliche, but I love Christmas. I don’t celebrate holidays much anymore, but Christmas still seems magical to me. People are nicer to one another, and I love making gifts for my friends.

What’s your favorite TV show? 

This is a tough one. I think right now my favorite is Walking Dead. I love Star Trek (every incarnation), Hannibal, Game of Thrones, Downton Abby, Bates Motel, American Horror Story, The X-Files, Twin Peaks & Fargo. 

Alright guys... don’t make fun of me: I also like the cheesy cop/forensic shows like Law & Order/-SVU, Bones, CSI, Blacklist etc. Most of the superhero shows are pretty darn awful but I watch them anyway. I’ve been watching Jessica Jones, Daredevil & Shield. I gave up on Supergirl after a few episodes. I watched a couple seasons of Green Arrow. Not sure if I’ll watch the next one. I also love nature shows & shows that are about living in less-common environments, like Alaska the Last Frontier & Mountain Men.

Embarrassing guilty pleasures: Scorpion, Eureka, Covert Affairs, Torchwood, Fringe, Firefly, Doctor Who, Battlestar Galactica, Trailer Park Boys

I only have basic cable & Netflix and of course I don’t watch pirated shows... so NO SPOILERS PLEASE!

What’s your favorite movie?

Also a tough one. I have kind of a bad memory when it comes to movies, but I know that I love Ghost Dog, some of the Star Trek movies, some of the Star Wars movies, The Big Lebowski. My favorite genres are horror and scifi. I HATE romantic comedies. 

Who's your favorite comic?

Louis CK & George Carlin

What was your introduction to femdom? 

A friend introduced me to it. She thought I had a good personality for making clips. I did a lot of research on a few fetishes & tried some clips. Over the years I’ve gotten deeper into it, and I think I’ve found my favorites. 

What are your favorite fetishes? 

I think this could be answered in two different ways. There are fetishes that I enjoy filming & ones that I personally enjoy. I really like filming most fetishes, but when I know it’s something that looks hot and will sell well, it makes it much easier. As for which fetishes I enjoy the most personally, I enjoy a medical component to scenes, I also love pantyhose, executrix & taboo. I like forced bi, cuckolding & sissy training when done in a certain context. When I start doing more real-time sessions I’m sure I’ll discover many more that I enjoy. Just because I’m dominant doesn’t mean I’m inflexible The amazing thing about being open is that I am always finding more things to enjoy & always learning more about myself.

Do you love what you do? 

Absolutely. My job/life is so awesome. I work really hard, and I have to constantly challenge myself, but I love being my own boss, and I love getting to explore my fetishes & fulfill others’ fantasies through my videos. I have a lot of responsibilities & I am a tough boss, but it’s so cool to be able to take off in the middle of the week to go hiking or be able to go out when most people are at work. 

What are you doing this summer? 

Oh man, I am so excited about this summer. If I work hard enough, I plan to take most of it off. I’ll still be filming with some other models (more details to come) & I’ll still be taking custom requests, but I won’t be filming nearly as much as I do now (3-5 days per week). I have a few road trips planned, and more are in the works.

Someone recently told me that he thought I must live such a glamorous life. Now, I’m not one of the ladies who posts daily photos of me “pampering” myself, drinking champagne & eating expensive meals, so I’m not sure where he got this impression. Nothing against women who can/do live that way, or at least give that impression, but my life isn’t “glamorous” per se. It is really awesome though. Most of my days are similar, in that I follow a relatively normal schedule, but that’s by design & not by necessity. I am a Goddess after all, and I design my own life :)

Here’s an “average” day in the life of Lady Fyre:

7:30-9 Make coffee, feed the cat, respond to e-mails, put yesterday’s sales into spreadsheets, check the filming schedule, type/print scripts, send out customs that rendered overnight, and list a clip if there’s time. 

9-11 Yoga or gym. I usually alternate days, and right now I’m working out 7 days/week, but I’m sure that will be less in the summer. After working out, I head to my mailbox to pick up packages.

11-1: Grab a quick meal, shower & get ready to film clips. 

1-3 or 4: Film clips. If I’m done early, I work more on my schedule or list some content. 

3 or 4-8: Eat, answer e-mails, list more clips, plan shoots, eat again. Skype sessions, if they’re pre-scheduled. Send out more customs if they’ve rendered during the day.

8-9:30: Gym or dinner. I go back the gym if the morning’s yoga class wasn’t strenuous enough.

9:30-12 Chill out time (usually watch TV while snuggling the cat). Or last night I hemmed 3 pairs of pants (I’m so short it’s not uncommon for me to have piles of clothing alterations lying about.)

As you can see, I work throughout the day most days. In fact, I usually work 7 days/week.  My “days off”... well, let’s be honest: I don’t often have days off. There are “filming days” and “computer days.” The latter are usually filled with hair appointments, e-mails, listing content, coding my website, & other business that I don’t have time for on filming days. Some people say I’m a workaholic, and they’re probably right. 

Though my schedule may look ordinary & really normal, I still have freedom that I wouldn’t have at a “desk job”. I am my own boss, and I am quite demanding, but as most of you know, under the surface my life is anything but ordinary. The content of the e-mails I read/write, the nature of the filming I do, and the interactions I have with people are interesting & vary day to day. Sometimes I like to remind myself how awesome my life is by telling one of my friends (or my hairdresser) what I just did. “Oh, well I was a jewel thief today. I pulled a big heist, then I seduced my partner & killed him because I didn’t want to share the profits.” Or, “Well, I was Poison Ivy today. I captured Batman, sucked his dick to drain his testosterone, rubbed my pussy all over his face, then made him suck my strap-on... because everyone knows that oral injection via strap-on dildo is the most effective pheromone delivery system.” My friends think it’s great, and I do too. 

BUT.... SUMMER VACATION!!

I think it’s important to mention (or maybe I’m just really excited about it) that I also get to take a lot of time off. I go through periods of working very hard, and then I get to take week-long vacations once a month throughout the summer. This summer I’m taking more time off than ever. In fact, I only plan on working one or two days per week when I’m home. By May I will have all of my content filmed for the summer, and the only work I will do is listing clips & filming custom requests. The rest of the time I will be exploring the city, hiking, going on road trips, visiting National Parks, and just generally doing whatever my heart desires. Oh, and eating soooo much delicious food. I’m am really looking forward to this summer. 

Pretty soon I will be frequently mentioning these vacations in my tweets & in my communication with my subs & loyal customers. While I enjoy the pampering from my guys throughout the year, I’m hoping you all will be particularly supportive throughout the summer, even if I’m not around as much. This “rest & recovery” period is so vital to me coming back to my job refreshed & excited to make more awesome content, and it will help to reinvigorate my relationships with my subs who rely on my training.

I have been taking it for granted that there are lots of ladies who devote much of their time to cam sessions, and that customers may assume that I do the same. So I decided to write about what my schedule is like, how much time I spend doing cam sessions, and how to schedule a session with me. 

I spend about 1-3 hours per week in Skype sessions with clients. Most of my clients are “regulars,” meaning that I’ve been sessioning with them online for at least a few months, and most for a year or more. I love sessioning with my regulars because I know what they like, and it’s exciting to explore new territory with a good base knowledge of their likes & dislikes. When a regular books a session, I put the time in my calendar and I trust that he will pay me before the session begins. As long as I have payment at least an hour before we start, I’m happy. Or sometimes I even take last-minute sessions.

I also love doing cam sessions with new customers. It’s great to meet new people & to learn about what turns them on & makes them weak for me. The thing with new clients though is that we have not yet established a rapport. When you send me a session request, I can’t assume that you’re going to follow through with the appointment, and often clients don’t end up paying. Things come up, schedules change, etc. Therefore I can only reserve your session slot AFTER you have paid me. For new clients, I request that you pay me at least 8 hours in advance. That way I have plenty of time to make sure my schedule is clear for you, and I can prepare both myself & my space. 

Don’t worry! Before you know it, you’ll be a “regular” client too.

If you’re lucky, you might get a super-last-minute appointment. Let’s be honest: most guys only try to get sessions when they’re horny & ready to go, right? I understand that. So a few times a month I will sign onto Skype & will Tweet that I’m online & available RIGHT NOW. Then it’s your lucky day. Fill out my session form, e-mail me, or just sign onto Skype & say hi. But whichever method you choose, please be prepared to pay. 

http://ladyfyre.com/cam-with-goddess/

[email protected]

Why don’t I cam often? Well, my schedule just doesn’t allow it right now. There is so much involved in running a business. I work out at the gym and/or yoga 6 days per week, I prepare all of my own meals at home (that’s time-consuming!), I film clips at least 3 days per week, and the days I’m not filming are devoted to listing content, updating my website, and all the little things that you probably don’t want to hear about. So while I love getting to know my customers better through Skype sessions, my availability is limited. Much love to my camgirl sisters who are working it like bosses. Clips are my priority right now though.

If I’m not around, check out one of my friends at livecammodelshows.com & tell them I say hello. 

The best way to catch me is to request an evening session, request your session a day ahead of time, and be very specific about what you’d like to do in your session. Please also make sure you can use one of my approved payment methods. I don’t take P@yp@l, GiftR0cket, G00gleWallet or any other “vanilla” method. They don’t allow payment for adult services. Bummer, I know, but we have to play by the rules.

http://ladyfyre.com/payment-methods/

I’m relatively “new” myself compared to a lot of people in the industry, and I’m not qualified to give advice on much, but I’ve learned a few things along the way. I’ve seen a lot of people being called out on Twitter recently for copying others’ clips. I’ve thought about doing it myself a few times, but what stopped me is knowing that customers love to order the exact same clip from multiple ladies. I also remember how many times I’m ready to post a clip, search for my proposed clip title on C4S only to find 1-100 people who have already used the title or filmed the idea. In fact, a long time ago I complained on Twitter about three girls stealing my idea & title within one week, I mentioned the title, and a veteran model linked me to her clip from 2 years prior... with the same title. Oops. Now I see new clips with that title or theme pop up at least once a week. I know some people totally copy on purpose, and I’m not admonishing anyone for how they deal with that. 

If you’ve been around a while, you’ve likely experienced someone copying you, whether intentionally or not. Or you’ve been the first to do a certain type of clip then watched in dismay as hoards of ladies caught on. Or you’re among the first to start filming using a certain method, or angle, or using a certain lighting technique. Or you’re the first to use special effects in a particular way. Then... they... come. (And yes, I’m sure I’ve been a “they” to many.) Even though I’ve only been making clips for a few years, I’ve had the experience of filming in a certain “category” before it even existed on C4S (or another site). Then someone made an actual category for it. Now it’s flooded. All that is a bit hard to take. 

Ask yourself what YOU did when you first started. Now, if you were among the first dozen people to start making clips, this probably doesn’t apply to you. But for everyone else, the basic method of learning how to make clips is to look around & see what others are doing, add in what interests you, put your own spin on it, and develop your persona from there. Or you already have your persona, you look around to see what interests you, etc. 

Think about Starbucks, whose first store opened in 1971. Seattle’s Best actually opened in 1970, and moved to Seattle in 1972. By 1983, both companies were expanding. The Coffee Beanery opened in 1976. Caribou Coffee opened in 1992. Dunkin’ Doughnuts opened in 1950, and I remember when they started offering iced coffee concoctions. Now they sell their coffee beans in stores. There are so many companies doing pretty much the same thing. They all started in different places with different offerings, they evolved differently. But all of those companies have looked around to see what the competition is doing & have either copied it outright, or with their own spin, & they’ve all done what they can to “one-up” the others. Some will succeed, some won’t, and creativity/ innovation isn’t always the deciding factor. A friend of mine likes to remind me that most businesses operate this way. It’s just in the industries which pride themselves on creativity, and which is comprised largely of independent contractors (like our industry), where people get so personally offended. 

Despite all that realism, practicality & business sense, here’s a few words of advice to producers just starting out:

1. Just because you WANT to be a certain personality doesn’t mean you’re going to succeed at it. Your real personality, your talents, your looks, and your customers will largely determine at what you’re successful. This is a touchy topic. Not everyone can be “brat girl”, not everyone can be a “porn star” & not everyone can be a “posh lady”. It makes sense to dip your toes in where you’re interested, but you’ll quickly find your place if you listen to your heart & your customers (read: your sales stats). You’ll do yourself a great disservice trying to emulate someone else simply based on your desires, and rigidly sticking to that idea despite evidence showing that you’re just not that person. Embrace what is unique about you. Feed it & watch it grow. I’ve had conversations with more than one producer who is frustrated about what her customers want from her. I’ve experienced that myself. So then it becomes a matter of finding a balance between what you like to do & what actually makes you money. That can take a long time, and you’ll find out that it’s ever-evolving. My first clips were a mess. I tried being a brat girl, and it was hilarious. Props to those who do it well. Sure, I’m bratty in some ways, and I don’t take crap from people, but I’m just not a brat girl. Now I’ve developed a persona that is super close to who I really am when I’m not on camera, and not having to pretend to be something else entirely has really worked out for me. I think my customers recognize that too.

2. Be as original as you can be in a world full of copycats. It’s actually kind of hard to be completely original. Pretty much everything has been done. Even if you’re being creative about your methods or your stories, you’re still calling on stock tropes or even well-known TV or movie icons. We are what we know. We do what we know. What we know is known by others, and has usually been re-done by others. But still, you have to try. And you CAN make original content. I think of some of my most creative clips, and I can probably identify influences if I take a hard look, but I doubt I’ve done anything that’s exactly what another person has done (some customs excluded). I probably have some completely original clips, but I don’t spend much time examining it. My clip filming method used to be this: come up with an idea, search around to see if it’s been done to some degree, then go back to the drawing board 75% of the time. It was time-consuming & discouraging. Now I come up with an idea & film it. Then I come up with a clip title & search for that. Sometimes I find out later that my idea was done before, but oh well. I can only control so much. Maybe somewhere in the back of my mind I stored an image or phrase I saw online or on another store’s listing, but I know that I’ve done all that I can to be original.

3. Try not to make enemies. I have met some amazing ladies (and guys) through my work in this industry. So many people have helped me get where I am, and I help other people too. We’re all competition to varying degrees, and we can’t give it all away, but we help where we’re comfortable helping, and we want to see one another succeed. I’m sure I have some kind of reputation among other producers, but I have no idea what it is, and it’s really not any of my business. All I know is that I try to be as nice to other people as possible, I accept other people for who they are (whether or not I choose to continue to work with/ communicate with them), and I try not to make enemies. Other people in this industry can be friends & they can be resources. It’s hard to come back from developing a bad reputation. Some day you might need advice, or you might want to work with other people. You might be a very independent person but you still exist in a world of other people, and you’re in an industry where your reputation matters. Also, respect those who have come before you. Sure, you can try to do it better, and maybe you’ll succeed, but have some respect for what they’ve accomplished, their vast knowledge & experience, & how they’ve shaped this industry. 

Today seems to be Request a Free Custom Video Day, with several fans trying to conjure up something which- in my mind- doesn’t really exist, so I thought I should clarify the difference between a “request” & a “custom”. 

Request: asking me to make & post a certain type of video

Ex: “Can you please make more CEI videos?”

Custom: paying my set price to make a specific video suited to your fetishes

Ex: “Would love to see a video where you do _____, say _____, wear ____, and call me _____.”

Requests:

I rarely do requests. It’s not that I don’t love & appreciate you guys. It’s that, despite loving what I do, if I didn’t make money from it, I couldn’t keep doing it. I am quite familiar with what sells well for me, and I’m also familiar with what types of videos I love to make. If you see lots of (insert type) videos, that means they sell well for me and/or I love to make them. Yes, I sometimes make videos just for the fun of it.

If you see in my store a distinct lack of videos covering your fetish, that probably means they don’t sell well for me or they’re not among my favorite types. (The exception is the types I haven’t yet tried.) If you request a video that I’m 90% sure won’t make me any money, I will politely refer you to my custom request form. 

But don’t let that stop you from politely making a request. Sometimes I forget, for example, that I haven’t made a leg fetish video in 3 months. I’m a busy bee & some things just slip my mind. So much kink, so little time!

Customs:

I love making custom videos. My customers come up with some creative ideas, and I love fulfilling fantasies. 

...I also love seeing a return on my investment. 

Making videos is an investment in my time, energy & often money. When I come up with my own ideas for my store, I invest my time & energy into making something fun that I calculate (based on research & sales numbers) will provide me with a return. It’s like educated gambling. When you order a custom clip, you’re the one making the investment (or gambling, if you will). I’ve made lots of custom videos that didn’t re-sell at all/ well. Yet (to my knowledge) I’ve never had an unhappy “custom” customer, so it’s a pretty safe bet on your part.

That said, sometimes I tweet that I’m accepting video “requests”. Sometimes (gasp!) I actually run out of ideas, am all caught up on customs, and am interested to know what my fans have bought from me & want to see more of. I’m then willing to drink from the well-spring of your kinky thoughts. But if I politely refer you to my custom request form, please don’t take offense. It doesn’t mean I think your idea is bad or silly. (I actually find most fetishes to be interesting.) If you’re a confirmed customer (you’ve spent money on my clips-  preferably consistently), I am much more likely to fulfill your request. 

A few fans have requested that I try to post more blogs. And a recent tweet prompted me to write a little about myself. 

Some weird/ little-known facts about me:

I love cooking & eating. I would much rather spend extra cash on garlic-stuffed olives, cayenne pepper mangoes, and ingredients for some new dish I’ve been wanting to make than on clothes or make-up. My current favorite things to make are pickled red onions, garlic sauce, and anything with cheese on it. I tend to forgo the Southern, American cuisine of my childhood in favor of Mexican, Indian, Moroccan, and whatever else I can make up out of my ever-growing spice collection. Consequently, I often work out 6 days/week. :) If I wasn’t so busy, I would love to have a food blog with lots of obnoxiously gorgeous photos. 

I have a Bachelor of Science Degree. I earned it several years ago, and though I don’t actively use it, I am grateful for my college education. I will never forget the most important thing I learned: HOW to think. 

I prefer hiking, road trips & sight-seeing in national parks or weird, small towns to vacationing on beaches or exotic places (though I would love to do a tropical vacation some day). My imagination can stretch when I’m on the road, and I like to imagine what life is like in each little town I pass.

Green landscape & water make my heart happy.

I much prefer fruity to chocolate or other rich flavors. I love jellybeans, Sour Patch Kids, and those things they used to call “Shock Tarts.” If I wasn’t on a perpetual low-carb diet, I would eat those suckers until my tongue hurts. (Shhhh... I often do that anyway, diet be damned.)

I love clothes shopping, though I don’t buy even 5% of what I try on. Most places don’t make nice clothes for tiny adults.

I’m smaller than most people think. I’m barely 5 feet tall, I weigh about 100 lbs, I wear a size 5 shoe, and though I’m kinda “curvy,” I wear anywhere from a size 0 to size 4 in jeans/dresses. I even have to cut about 4 inches off “petite” jeans. 

I set at least 4 alarms on my phone each night to make sure I don’t oversleep. The most important thing I have to do in the morning these days is yoga, but I still set 4 alarms. I like waking up early & doing 1-2 hours of work on the computer while I drink coffee. Sleeping in makes me cranky because I feel like I’ve wasted the day.

I love pantyhose & high heels. I don’t often get a chance to wear them other than when I’m filming, since I work from home & spend a lot of time on the computer. Still, I just love pantyhose & high heels. I feel so sensual when I wear them. I also love lingerie. Again, I usually only wear it when filming, but I love the way that a silky piece of lingerie feels against my skin.

Things I love but don’t often have time for these days: poetry, forensic novels, writing, knitting, & designing clothes. If I could choose any job in the world, other than what I do now (I love my job), I would make handmade clothes & accessories. Sometimes I have to take a break from life & just create something, and I’ve been known to spend days upon days creating a gift for a friend or relative.

I love making custom clips for you. It's fun to act out your fantasies & to see them come alive in the final product. It's a job I enjoy, but it is still my job.

If you're not involved in making clips, it's completely understandable that you don't know exactly what goes into making a clip. I've seen a few producers posting a blog entry about this lately, and I think it's a good idea. I value you- my customers-, and while I know that you appreciate my content, I think many don't really understand how hard I work to make awesome, high-quality content. My husband, who is my editor, promoter, and frequently my co-star, works just as hard as I do.

The making of a custom:

30 min - 2 hrs: Makeup, hair, wardrobe, set, lighting, camera angles, and video/audio check

15 min - 3 hrs: Actual filming of one clip

1 - 10 hrs: Initial rendering of original files, to increase image quality

30 min - 8 hrs: Editing clip

1 - 8 hrs: Final rendering of clip

30 min - 1 hr: e-mails & file uploading

Total: approx 4-20 hrs per clip

That's just the custom clip process. Re-selling is mentioned later.

Breakdown:

I pay site fees & taxes on every single dollar I make. Adult payment processors take a larger percentage than processors for any other industry. The payout varies from site to site.

Let's say you pay $100 for a simple 10 minute solo custom clip:

$100 custom clip = $52.50 - $63.75 after site fees & taxes

A really simple 10 minute custom takes an average of 4-5 hours total, from start to finish. That's $10.50-$15.93/hr after taxes... for making custom porn. 

Now take into account the costs involved in making clips. I am very fortunate to have wonderful customers who help cover those costs through wishlist purchases. Each year my customers collectively contribute toward my clip endeavors, and I greatly appreciate those contributions. However, I frequently spend a lot of my own money on purchasing equipment, lighting, clothing, costumes, props, backdrops, bedding & furniture- all used solely for making clips. I also have to pay for beauty expenses such as hair products, make-up, manicures & pedicures. That's not even to mention the hundreds to thousands per year spent on software, websites, data storage, etc.

Re-listing:

What happens after you receive your custom so that I can recoup any losses and/or make the most from the time spent on your custom?

1 - 8 hrs: Rendering of additional video formats, for upload to various sites with different requirements

1 - 2 hrs: Gif making, uploading files to sites, listing content (including writing descriptions & keywords, scheduling, etc.)

+ various amounts of promotion, depending on the content

“But it's an awesome idea, and I'm sure you'll make so much money when you re-sell it.”

I give you guys credit for coming up with some creative scenarios. And I'm positive that, to you, those scenarios are the hottest thing you can imagine. That's awesome. I'm glad you are so enthusiastic about your fetish. And I know that there are other guys who share your exact fetish. However, sales are a bit more complex than that, and humans are a varied & marvelous species, as are our tastes.

Making custom content can be profitable in terms of re-sale, but it's a crap shoot. It all depends on the current market, what my current customer base is interested in, and how rare your fetish is. It also depends on the intricacies of the content. For example, if your name is in the clip, it's much harder to sell it to other customers, which is why I charge more for that. If you request a fetish that I don't normally do, it's unlikely that my customers will purchase your clip. If your custom is rare fetish or a rare mix of fetishes/requirements, it limits my customer pool and exposure, and it's unlikely that the clip will sell well. The awesome sellers simply balance out the ones that don't sell. And I do not make any more from re-selling your customs than I do from content birthed from my own ideas.

Synopsis:

Custom porn is wonderful. I love making it, and you love having your exact fantasy played out in a video by your model of choice. However, custom porn is a luxury, and not everyone can afford luxuries. It's actually a relatively inexpensive luxury if you think about how much you might spend going golfing, going to a movie in a theater, or on one night of drinking at a club. And those are all experiences you get to have just once. Custom porn is something you can experience over & over, as often as you like, and from the convenience of your own home.

Considering that fast food workers in my great city of Seattle were recently lobbying for $15/hr minimum wage, please forgive me if I don't take pity on you when you tell me I'm “too expensive” or give me one of the various reasons why I should make an exception & charge you less than my standard rate.

I am worth my rate and more.

I've been getting so many e-mails lately that ask this question. If you want a response from Me, here's what you need to know:

1. First impressions are important. Address Me as Lady Fyre or Goddess. If you just skip straight to the part where you tell Me what you want, I'm going to assume that you're selfish & careless. Your "service" to Me will most-likely also be selfish & careless. These e-mails usually go into the trash bin. 

2. Keep it short & get to the point. Long, flowery, demure e-mails: think about how much of My time is being consumed just by reading your first e-mail to Me. I will assume that you are going to eat up A LOT of My precious time in the future, and I'm usually grumpy by the time I manage to figure out what your point is.

If you've made it this far, and still want to serve:

How can you serve Me? Think about this before you contact Me.

1. I can get compliments from anywhere, so if you plan to send Me copious e-mails filled with compliments in exchange for My attention... just don't. 

2. I do not allow slaves to come to My home, and I only meet slaves in person after a relationship has been established. If you feel the need to meet right away, or if your only way of serving is as a maid, then please contact another Domme instead. If I do eventually agree to meet you, it will be for shopping. At this time, I only do RT sessions with My friends' subs.

3. You MUST be willing & able to spend money. This is a cold hard fact of online domination. Without your money, you are of absolutely no use to Me. No, I am not a "findom." I do, however, expect to be paid for My services. Cam, phone, clips, custom clips, gifts, tributes: all ways to spend on Me.