L.A. Noire Sideblog

He knows how important first impressions are so will 110% act like a gentleman and smooth talk his way into a date

He’ll go all out as far as impressing you (don’t expect anything too fancy though, because he’s not that careless with his money) but he’ll spoil you and make you feel oh-so special until he gets you in his bed

That’s when the real fun begins

By that I mean, homeboy starts to show his true colors after you start letting him hit

It’s not obvious at first but eventually you notice that he stops making an effort to take you out on dates or spoil you with presents

Your calls go unanswered and he doesn’t even attempt to return them

Unfortunately, the bastard is strategic and so he’s careful not ghost you completely because he always needs a few good holes on standby and you’re a pretty solid lay

Thus once in a while, he’ll stop by your place with some presents and a well-rehearsed apology that sounds just sincere enough to make you give him another chance

And another

And another

Logic seems to leave you whenever he’s involved because you know he’s a piece of shit but for some reason, you never seem to be able to shut the door in his face each time he casually shows up after days to weeks of acting like you don’t exist

As your patience wears thin, you become less capable of suppressing your annoyance at his actions

Which means you start to call him out on his bullshit and stop trying to prove yourself as being worth his investment

He said before he can’t stand women who didn’t know their place so you try to do exactly that in hopes that he’ll actually get mad at you and leave permanently (because despite him always being a prick who clearly sees you as nothing more than another one of his playthings, you’re oddly attached to him and you know it would hurt more to formally part ways than if he just completely ghosted you)

What you don’t realize is that he actually seems to enjoy the passive aggression and gets a kick out of your hostile attitude

He’s genuinely amused that you’ve lasted this long without asking him to get the fuck out of your life much like the other broads in his rotation did once they realized that he was just stringing them along

So Roy decides to see just how long it takes for you to reach your limit, fully prepared for you to give up on him within the month at latest

But then the month ends and you’re still letting him into your apartment, still letting him complain about his annoyingly rule-abiding partner and the stupid cases he drags Roy around to actually solve

You’re still letting him in after he shows up at your place with a split lip and bruised knuckles from his latest run-in with the local hopheads, and you’re quick to get him some ice and rub his shoulders as he makes himself comfortable on the sofa (two months)

You’re still letting him in at shit o’clock in the morning when you should be asleep for your early shift because you’d heard he’d gotten into a shootout that day and you refused to head to bed until you saw him return in one piece (five months)

You’re still letting him in after some scandals come to light and he has to temporarily abandon his apartment until things settle down, not even raising an eyebrow when you see him hauling two large suitcases into your bedroom (eight months)

Roy doesn’t fall in love right away; in fact, it doesn’t occur to him that what he’s feeling is love at all because he always believed himself to be above all that mushy shit

All he knows is that you’re familiar and he doesn’t have to try as hard when he’s around you

That he genuinely hasn’t gotten bored of you and actually enjoys your company even if he won’t admit it

He’ll never call you the most beautiful thing in existence or tell you that his life never felt truly complete until he met you, but he does buy a house for the two of you to move in and gives you full access to his finances

He’d rather die than admit that to him, you’re the most important person in the world and he actually wouldn’t know what to do if you finally come to your senses and realize that he doesn’t deserve you, but he does slip a pretty diamond ring on your finger while you’re asleep and pretends like he has no idea what it means when you ask him about it in the morning

He only says “I love you” in the most exaggerated, most sarcastic and mocking way possible, but you don’t miss the way his cheeks light up and he chokes on his cig whenever you parrot the sentiment with a grin

You’re warned that Roy is simply toying with you and taking advantage of your naivety (and to be fair, that’s exactly what he did initially) but you figure that you must mean something to him if he’s always coming home to you as soon as his shift ends, speeding past all the jazz clubs and bars so he can kiss you as soon as you open the front door

But don’t be fooled—he’s still a smug bastard through and through

It’s simply part of his… charming personality and you never exactly sought to change him

Naturally, he does piss you off from time to time, except now he’s not exactly as keen to find out just how much of his shit you’ll take before giving up

Not that he’ll ever let you leave, of course