kris

i literally cannot express the ANGER i had at my first last competition yesterday. i spin rifle during my second movement, and so i was so ready to spin it. the guard set a little bit before the pit, which i was like it’s okay, right? WRONG! their freaking director was moving some flags, and that’s not even the worst part. THEY PUT THEIR DRUM SET ON TOP OF MY RIFLE! i didn’t even get to spin it!! i literally SOBBED throughout the rest of the show. i was LIVID! but surprisingly we made best colorguard

i just wanted to say that you’re beautiful, and you deserve to live💕✨

i really want to tell my parents about my sexuality. but i feel like i just can’t. and im sitting here on my floor, about to cry because i want to have ideas for my room and my clothing that represents me, but because i have this barrier, i can’t. i don’t know how they would react. im literally screaming at myself to tell them, but i can’t. i already feel like a disappointment in my family; what if i tell them, and then i’d be more of a disappointment again? i know the saying, “you don’t know unless you tell them.” but it’s so hard. literally pretty much everyone else knows, including my sisters and boyfriend, but my parents are literally the hardest people to tell. they’re not exactly homophobic but since they’re catholic, i feel like they wouldn’t accept me. i already don’t speak to them about my depression or anxiety because i dont want to be a burden to them. i wish i am able to talk to them like my sister can because she just got diagnosed with anxiety. she was able to get help because she said something. but i literally feel like i can’t say anything to them. i don’t know what to do..

guess who’s the annoying one in the group. mee. guess who’s gonna stay quiet and distant from everyone. mee!