I told my government class about the Great Emu War and half the class didn’t believe me so we had my government teacher look it up on the projector oh my god
only in australia
wait how did the emus win
have you ever met an emu
d e v o n
almost home
RMH

#extradirty

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$LAYYYTER
KIROKAZE
occasionally subtle
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH

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@kubeis
I told my government class about the Great Emu War and half the class didn’t believe me so we had my government teacher look it up on the projector oh my god
only in australia
wait how did the emus win
have you ever met an emu

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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i cant believe she gave him her whole net worth
DUCKS DO IT TOO
good news, everyone.
oh man. one time i was out with a group of friends, it was around 3 in the morning and we’d all just spilled out of this nightclub, all completely smashed, when one guy goes “OI DID YOU SEE THAT? THAT LIGHT JUST THEN??” and this fUCKING LASER DOT ZOOMS PAST US ON THE GROUND AND WE’RE ALL LIKE YOOOOO DAFUQ IS DIS??? I SWEAR TO GOD WE SPENT NEARLY TEN MINUTES CHASING THIS FUCKING THING AROUND THE STREET BEFORE WE FIGURED OUT THERE WAS SOME ASSHOLE LIKE 10 STORIES UP IN THE APARTMENT BEHIND US PISSING HIMSELF.
so yeah. cats, ducks and drunk college students. fucking idiots the lot of them.

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WAKE UP POTTER
WE’RE GOING TO THE ZOO
Old guy with a rabbit on his head smoking a joint. Sounds about right
The rabbit got them stoner eyes lol
me 50 years in the future
Cut the Ernie.
PLEASE LET 19 BE THE QUESTION NUMBER AND NOT THE ANSWER.
my mom thinks “anime con” means “anime conference”. i keep having to remind her that isn’t what it means

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no you dont understand
these are two separate toys that we found at the thrift store today okay
and we found out that they fit like this and it was beautiful
and then we were going up to the cashier to get our things and realized they were still like that and were separating them so that we could each purchase the one we had found and
the cashier
looked
so confused and„, distressed and horrified omg
the look on his face was like we had taken his soul and run it through a blenderim
i tried to fix it omg i was just like
"……………………..he was just…. resting"
but i dont think anything can make up for the trauma we caused.
oh my god i had literally fucking forgotten about this and then a single person reblogged this from me again, just one single person oh my god
… when did this get 87 thousand fucking notes jesus fucking christ
This might be the best work snapchat I’ve ever sent
He gave up.
Endless list of things that should have been in the movies ↳ Prisoner of Azkaban, p 120
“Then you should know, Potter, that Sybill Trelawney has predicted the death of one student a year since she arrived at this school. None of them has died yet. Seeing death omens is her favourite way of greeting a new class.”
Wait wait wait
so there was a theory bouncing around that Trelawney was actually scary accurate, right?
What if every student she predicted died in the battle for Hogwarts?
THATS JUST WHAT I WAS THINKING
I’m done.
It’s interesting because if you go back and reread the books, every single one of Trelawney’s predictions, even the really ridiculous ones, came true. So this is actually not only possible but highly probable.

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he’s twelve
my public school used to have a yearbook committee and me and my friends really hated some guy from 5th grade because he used to always tease us so we changed his name to milky cow in the yearbook (they ended up having to go over every year book with sticker strips to cover milky cow with his real name) and that’s why they discontinued the yearbook committee