‘in a parallel universe we’re going to mauritius,’ he says, sprawled in an airport lounge at 5am waiting for yet another delayed flight, studying the departures screen through half-shut eyes.
see the irony of your lifestyle is that in spite of all the coming and going, all the frequent flyer miles, all the jetlag and time-zones – you miss travelling. you’re tired of seeing cities through smoked glass cars and rooftop views. so you play spin the globe, make a list of all the places you want to go or go back to, look up flights, but timing is never right. mauritius, alaska, a safari in south africa; the plans are all put in the back burner because you’ve always got new york to come back to and more often than not you’d swap any king sized suite for your tiny little apartment, your squeaky bed, the old mattress that is carved to the shape of your bodies. in a parallel universe this is where you spend all your time, you get to know your neighbours, the barista at the café around the corner knows your order by heart. in that universe you have time to grow tired of the city, and maybe then you’ll go on road trips and holidays abroad. in this universe though, he’s gone again before you can say ‘home sweet home’ and now the flat seems cold and empty. now you wonder what you’re doing here when mum calls from the beach in april, or sends photos of the view from your childhood bedroom, or asks when you’re coming home, when will they finally meet him. maybe in a parallel universe you have 9-to-5 jobs and never learned what he looks like through pixelated facetime calls, never met a time-zone, never spent days with nothing but a couple texts. in that universe, you find time to go visit your family, you watch him discuss politics with your grandpa and play tag with your little cousins in the backyard.
yet you’re still here, your plane is still delayed, airports all look the same. maybe that’s your constant. that and him, regardless of where or when or how far apart. and at the end of the day, you rest assured that of all the parallel universes that isn’t one you don’t get to share with him.
areudirty
titsay
