admire my face as you wish just don’t go shipping yourself with me. save yourself the public embarrassment.

no one has to know i secretly make our action figures kiss…

no fanta?? 😟 i get it. you hate fun…

don’t downplay your skills like that simon, i have faith you have better lines than “i hope you know cpr because you’re taking my breath away.” i’ll give the guy the benefit of the doubt that since he was tipsy his game was probably off, but still didn’t make him any less obnoxious.

my skills are mostly just staring at someone from across the bar, praying they catch the vibes because ✨ social anxiety ✨. that's still probably better than the cpr line anyway.

as an avid energy drink enjoyer... it's terrible. that's saying something coming from me. i actually liked the beetlejuice fanta from last halloween when everyone else said it tasted like candles.

i know i can be fucked up when it comes to matches but i'm glad tanahashi came off the ladder in the ladder when this man has non-existent knees ... i was getting concerned, i'll admit to that.

good morning to everyone, except the dude at the bar last night that couldn’t take a hint and proceeded to use the corniest pick-up lines known to man. if you’re going to hit on a girl, at least make it something original.

i have to hear these pickup lines. if he’s using any of my material, i may need to rethink some things.

Joe Hendry need to find someone else business to be in. 😒 what the helly was last night.

might i suggest sending him an endless amount of memes until he has no choice but to answer you?

i know i can be fucked up when it comes to matches but i'm glad tanahashi came off the ladder in the ladder when this man has non-existent knees ... i was getting concerned, i'll admit to that.

Joe Hendry need to find someone else business to be in. 😒 what the helly was last night.

it seems you need to find your own secret weapon to summon. gordon ramsay? danny devito?

i know i can be fucked up when it comes to matches but i'm glad tanahashi came off the ladder in the ladder when this man has non-existent knees ... i was getting concerned, i'll admit to that.

I figured you'd want that opportunity to show off your Spider-Man collection. Seems like that's a little less popular than Pokemon when it comes to collecting. Do you have a favorite Pokemon? I think if I did that tiktok, it would involve showing off my ballgowns and why they are so special to me.

i know i can be fucked up when it comes to matches but i'm glad tanahashi came off the ladder in the ladder when this man has non-existent knees ... i was getting concerned, i'll admit to that.

brilliant. earth-shattering advice… a week and a half too late. i’ll live.

why can’t it be a hugging mood? you’re going down such a dark path and i don’t think i like it. i also assumed it was the hard work and perseverance that resulted in the sexy, but i stand corrected.

i know i can be fucked up when it comes to matches but i'm glad tanahashi came off the ladder in the ladder when this man has non-existent knees ... i was getting concerned, i'll admit to that.

my eyebrow’s one sneeze away from falling off, but nothing new. cheers for that.