I have never needed to be the center of attention. I've never done anything just to get people to look at me or pay attention to me. That's never been my thing. I'm not overly dramatic or am I a drama queen. So being the true definition of an attention where has never fit me. For that reason alone, I cannot truly understand people who are that way.

To me, attention seekers are the people with theoretical self esteem. They are the ones who are constantly looking for validation via others. It's a sad personality trait. It's one I'm thankful that I never possessed. And, what's even crazier is that the validation they're seeking will never be enough, it will never fill that empty space inside of them. One cannot look to others for their self esteem. Seeking in others what one lacks in their own person is a trap. It will always be this endless cycle.

Attention seekers have to be the life of the party. It's just who they are. I try to ignore people like that. I can't get into them. They are too much work all of the time. I am always conscious of allowing them into my life. Their energy always conflicts with mine. I don't seek attention from anyone. Because the reality is whatever is meant for me will be mine. I don't have to knock anothers shine to get mine. Besides, I garner enough genuine attention from the right folks on my own. And, there is nothing better than that!

#tweenthoughts.blogspot.com

Discrimination is different from reality. It becomes discerning when you did not accept in yourself the state of things that actually exist. It's far opposed to what you feel of being unjust when in fact you just lack respect for what is the truth and legitimate. 

This is actually about my two-cents with the undying issue for gender equality for public toilets and the SOGIE Bill in the local. The acceptance of what the LGBTQ demands for is easy to deal with since we have friends or families in this community who we wouldn't want to be hurt and to feel disregarded as a human however trying to claim the rights and privileges of a real woman is too much. It seems like it wants to rewrite the rules, to desert the faith, beliefs, and rights to adjust with their own sense of acceptance. Laws are provided to have peace and harmony but with this motion it will not bring good outcome since it will trigger chaos for trying to ruin the REALITY. 

it's getting harder to know my real purpose i have done everything, finished already the cause yet still locked in here, don't want to remain in this

help me i wanna wander the world to see the fate ahead in store let me take my downfall and do not fear loss

yearning to meet every highs and lows, even all angst when i'm alone yet still locked in here, don't want to remain in this

Today, I broke into tears while at work. I just read something sentimental from twitter and this girl tweeted that his father came across her room and when she asked why he told her that he is just tired and that he just wants to check her to get some strength.

This breaks my heart, remembering dad and mom. At my age, I think I'm lucky enough, I still get a dose of attention and love from them. My mom whenever she had a long day or stressed, she asks for hugs and kisses out of nowhere, same with dad after work, he searches for us, does some baby talk and kiss us on the forehead. I appreciate it but I don't respond obviously. I'm a crybaby so I just joke or tease them immediately to light up the mood since I don't want to end the scene too dramatic.

Those were their little demands from us and I am aware that it is their way to regain strength after a long day of efforts and hardships for our daily living. After reading the tweet, I was reminded that I should just allow and understand them. To shower them the love and care they want because they try so hard to be strong outside but they are getting old and weak, and what they want from us is just a simple gesture of affection to continue life even if it's getting harder for them.

Currently, I became so emotional, I overthink a lot, I feel like I carry the world on my shoulder. I'm struggling with myself for some personal reasons and I handle it alone. Sometimes I think I'm a failure, got nowhere to run to and like wanted to escape from what's making this difficult for me, I feel exhausted but today's discernment makes me realize that my parents' source of power is me. I should not give up easily thus I should stand up bravely for whatever trials I'm facing and to just look at them the same way to keep going.

It's just enchanting when you two spend the rest of the night doing nothing, you just both embraced with those warm hugs, staring while keep on saying how much you love and you mean to each other, no other focus in your own ruling world just the kind of chill you both matter.

“"Imagine that one day you are out for a walk in the woods. Suddenly you see a small spaceship on the path in front of you. A tiny Martian climbs out the spaceship and stands on the ground looking up at you… What would you think? Never mind, it’s not important. But have you ever given any thought to the fact that you are a Martian yourself? It is obviously unlikely that you will ever stumble upon a creature from another planet. We do not even know that there is life on other planets. But you might stumble upon yourself one day. You might suddenly stop short and see yourself in a completely new light. On just such a walk in the woods. I am an extraordinary being, you think. I am a mysterious creature. You feel as if you are waking from an enchanted slumber. Who am I? you ask. You know that you are stumbling around on a planet in the universe. But what is the universe? If you discover yourself in this manner you will have discovered something as mysterious as the Martian we just mentioned. You will not only have seen a being from outer space. You will feel deep down that you are yourself an extraordinary being."” 

- Jostein Gaarder, Sophie’s World 1991