memes for memes.

‘ what the fuck would anyone want with canada? ’

‘ we could assassinate the king. ’

‘ what a big bloody, cheeky jerk... ’

‘ i bet he’s having a lovely bloody nap up there! i hope he’s resting well! you want me to come sing you a lullaby? silly boy! ’

‘ hello. i was just eavesdropping behind the curtain there. ’

‘ we’re planning your, um— surprise party. ’

‘ let our journey to total domination begin this very evening. ’

' everyone kind of focuses on the "day" part of "daywalker," but actually, no one focuses on the "walker" part. you know, there’s a lot of walking. ’

‘ when does the wrestling start? ’

‘ it’s a smorgasbord of banality and despair. ’

‘ i'd like to see the construction of a huge opaque dome the size of the city, covering the city, and blocking out all sunlight. ’

‘ we would have nun-free zones with a sign that says: “no nuns. no nuns, none.” ’

‘ submit and receive mercy. resist and only death awaits. ’

‘ he’s blown it. ’

‘ give ___ an ax, and they’re second to none. ’

‘ where lies ___’s weakest point? oh, their achilles’ heel? so it’s their foot? well that’s simple. ’

‘ shall we kill him as a warning? ’

‘ let’s use him as a pawn. ’

‘ hello, cheeky little one. out having some fun, are we? ’

‘ i remember how it feels to be powerless and disrespected. ’

‘ are those little dogshits not giving you the deep respect you deserve? ’

‘ am i devious? yes, i think i am. ’

‘ as the old saying goes, i didn’t come here to make friends. that’s bullshit. that’s exactly what i came here to do. ’

‘ those who you trust cannot be trusted. ’

‘ it’s not i who needs help, it’s you — so it’s me who’s ending this conversation. not you. ’

‘ and you, my darling, won’t remember a thing about a damn thing. ’

‘ trying to ally with ___ is a shit plan. ’

‘ the power move here is to make ___ my personal agent of chaos. ’

‘ here i am, and this— this beautiful older woman wants to take me on a sexual journey. ’

‘ you are just a fresh baby shot out of her mother’s womb, glistening with light. ’

‘ maybe we should just start with mouth stuff, if that’s okay. ’

‘ wowie zowie! ’

‘ hello, my little nighttime brother. ’

‘ if i need anything, i will call you. but not through the ether, just by regular yelling. ’

‘ i gave you those raccoons as a bloody gift! ’

‘ she was gripping the window. she was clawing at the glass. ’

‘ i was hypnotized. ’

‘ i used hypnosis on him. ’

‘ why don’t we just write on them with marker pen? ’

‘ we have received this letter. ’

‘ silence. vampire comments only. ’

‘ as you can see, the place is fucking massive. ’

‘ are we having a house meeting? ’

‘ this is my office. also known as the hunting ground. ’

‘ the power grows stronger in him by the night. ’

‘ not on my watch. ’

‘ and i said “if he can do it, i can do it!” ’

‘ what ho, good friends! ’

‘ i’m not a killer. i find people who are easy... to kill. ’

‘ can i touch the sword? ’

‘ oh, you’ll touch the sword. ’

 ‘ we’re being very careful not to stand out, which is why we’re both dressed down. ’

‘ you heard me, ghost of christmas past bitch. ’

‘ yum yum yum, he was delicious! ’

‘ why would you walk home when you can turn into a bat? ’

‘ i would like some of that colorful dust that sparkles. ’

‘ so deliciously macabre! ’

‘ he works really hard, he’s just not great at it. ’

‘ you can’t be throwing ancient coins at me. ’

‘ you kind of disobeyed me just now, and i’m noting it. ’

‘ recently i have been seeing another man. he doesn’t see me though, because i sneak behind him. ’

‘ i think it is him. i think it is my reincarnated ex-boyfriend. ’

‘ so the tablet is the paper, your finger is the pen. ’

‘ do you have a quill? ’

‘ i’m actually in a relationship online, but we’ve yet to meet irl. ’

‘ are they a vampire larp group? ’

‘ we take our larping very seriously, and that was just an example. i wanted you to see that. ’

‘ so, are you a knight? ’

‘ i forgot how much of a fantastic raconteur you are! ’

‘ we should do that again. but i mustn’t. but i want to! ’

‘ open the casket. ’

‘ i say, old chap! that’s our familiar! ’

‘ i go through all this effort, i get the creepy paper— ’

‘ it’s CREPE paper! CREPE! ’

‘ centuries have passed.’ 

‘ you hide in the shadows. you are weak. ’

‘ it’s so dumb that i wore glitter. ’

‘ basically, we’re fucked. ’

‘ well, that was a complete disaster. ’

‘ anyway, you take care, okay? ’

‘ you think i’ve forgotten that tonight is a special occasion for you as well, haven’t you? ’

‘ prepare yourself. ’

‘ it’s a glitter portrait! it’s a portrait made from glitter! look, it’s you! ’