Kriti Pathak

In a room full of people I find you looking at me and you smile in encouragement, suddenly it's much easier to breathe. These tears halt in my eyes as my pride holds them off but when you hold me close, the dam crumbles under your soft touch. I am use to getting lost in between a sea of talking people but you hold my hand with a smile carrying me along. Darling how do I not worry when you have painted the world so beautiful but these paintings will soon dull with time and I don't want that time to come. I still want to trace the fate lines on your palm, to put my head on your shoulder when no one is looking.

Now I am another earth's moon

Because in my eyes he is not god anymore and neither the sun but rather a human. And I destroyed myself to be a believer to his religion only to be scammed and now I don't know what love means.

You ask me which color I see in you and I say blue. But it's not like the sadness that we associate with the color, you could never be so to me. I say blue like the color of the beach waves that I go to even after hearing the stories of people drowning, blue like the color of my room when I realised that your presence made the dull walls seem brighter. You were dark blue like the thunderstorms during monsoon where the winds would kiss my cheeks to sleep before whisking away. You were blue because it was the gateway to all the times I was happy. Your were blue like the ink I use to write down my fraction of love for you. For blue was my favorite color and so were you.

Thank you to everyone who has liked, reblogged and commented under my posts, your support means the world to me and I am still figuring out how to switch accounts to respond to comments but till then I just wanted to say a big thank you

For I didn't want to listen to the name given to me since birth, it sounded like a declaration of war. Yet I couldn't help but be curious of how the syllables would roll off your tongue so I told you and you repeated the words under your breathe until I no longer believed it was mine but a sacred phrase only to be whispered in prayers. Later I realised that you had indeed declared war but I was happy to walk down the battlefield unarmed just to hear my name fall off your lips again

But the war has carried on for too long, my hands are bloodied and my eyes can no longer cry. Yet I still go to mirror everyday to face the enemy, to try and end the enemy before I let the war consume me; destroy me. Just to make you love me

I never liked the empty walls of my apartment, the dull blue now greyed with coal and the wooden table bending under the weight of melancholy. So darling put your hand in mine just so I can dream how our haven might look. Bursting pastels with hanging vines, I see you dancing in the kitchen lights. Fairy lights illuminating our moments together as we promise ourselves another day together. Unmade bed with our stretching forms, I scribble my love for you on a piece of paper. Plants that die too quick under the hot sun, I'll keep you warm during the winters. Two toothbrush of complementary colors as you tell me about your day. Then your hand leaves mine and I'll survive. Living in these dull walls as long as we can make that haven together, one day.

Gasping, my hands flew to my chest There is a thundering in my heart There is a distant beat of want that rang alongside my melancholy For now my soul had a visitor I wish they would reside there forever

But forever is a hoax traded in playgrounds, it dies when we leave. So tie a string between us, a thread connecting us worlds apart so I can always come back to you.

Plates full of benevolence, a warm blanket of love and I knew it would be harder to leave the next day. My feet never left your sanctuary the next day and the day after it till the heat of the mug was familiar under my palms. Would you forgive me for all my past sins I wanted to ask?

Several disguises lay broken and dripping in blood that stained my hand red as I pleaded you to stay. It started when you were thrust into my dramatics, I had meet many versions of you .It should have been easier to let you go this time I thought as I danced around you in pretense but I couldn't decipher who you were meant to play this time - a foe or an ally? I circled you like a moth to fire and you did the same until my web of lies pulled us close in an act of make believe warmth. Majestic it was dancing in the harmony we created until my veil broke into pieces up till my scars wept again. There was happiness in me I begged. I'd peel the skin given to me to wear the one you adore if you stay by me now.