Koelleria

Bingo: Humour

"Come on Merlin, don't be such a girl!" Being used as a moving target in the early morning was really high on Merlin's list of reasons he should quit his job. The soon to be servant-less prince was using axes this time, aiming his (way too powerful) throws to the center of the small shield Merlin was holding on for dear life.

"I have seen Morgana fight and how Gwen can outsmart you in one sentence, so calling me a "girl" really—Christ, slow down!— really isn't the insult you think it is!" Merlin just managed to let out as the second axe came hurling. He then struggled to take it off the shield as it had, of course, wedged itself deep in the wood.

Arthur stopped, considering what Merlin had said "That's fair, I guess" Merlin barely had the time to sigh with relief as the third axe came crashing just slightly off from the center of the target, making Arthur click his tongue. Merlin had to retain himself very hard from cursing, and he thought a bit too hard about a resignation letter he wouldn't actually ever write, while he pulled off this axe.

"So what should I call you then?" Arthur called as he grabbed the fourth axe, polishing it with a rag. "What?" Merlin was out of breath now, and had trouble keeping up with a conversation while simultaneously trying to stay alive.

"If I can't call you a girl, what should I call you then?" Arthur rolled his eyes, as if it was obvious and Merlin was the one being ridiculous in this situation.

"Since when did you need my help to come up with insults?" Merlin let out, still struggling to stand straight but being grateful for this short moment of rest.

"I'm feeling generous today," Arthur's words certainly didn't match his actions as he all but thrust the fourth axe in Merlin's direction. Merlin raised his shield, wavering a bit with the strength of the throw.

"My sire is too benevolent" how Merlin still managed to be chatty in this state of exhaustion he could never tell; he really was amazed by the strength of his mind, he thought as he pulled off the axe from the shield.

"Arh Arh," Arthur rolled his eyes, grabbing yet another axe—how many did he have?— "Now give it to me, what's a good name for you".

"This is a new level of twistedness, even for you" Merlin mumbled, his words only intended for himself.

"I try my best thanks for noticing!" Arthur yelled back. The prince really had too good of a hearing for Merlin's sake. Merlin just sighed as he readied himself, raising his shield as he waited for the next throw.

"How about chicken?" the fifth axe burrowed itself in the wood.

"I mean I do like chicken," Merlin pulled out the axe and threw it on the ground.

"Invertebrate coward then!" sixth now, Merlin swore Arthur kept throwing them harder and harder.

"My bones are very hard actually," Merlin had to use both hands to get this axe out.

"Gutless rabbit!" Arthur yelled while throwing the seventh.

"You don't need to cut me open to check on the existence of my guts!!" Merlin cried out, raising his shield barely in time.

At that Arthur barked a true laugh, smiling wide as he threw the eighth axe, which was maybe why he didn't notice the previous axe that was still stuck in the shield. He did however notice when the axe he just threw hit the still lodged axe, bounced back on it, came hurling toward him and when the wooden handle smacked him scared in the head.