Beauty is dead.

my toxic trait is carelessly getting dressed in front of open windows because if someone wants to look in, that’s their problem

a kid came up to me to enquire about books on queen victoria, so I promptly guided him to the children’s history section, and we had a lovely chat flicking through horrible histories books, when I asked him what does he like about history. he grinned, and with a smooth, brilliant smile he said “My favourite thing about old times is torture.”

One time I had a dad come in with his ~10 year old kid and go “Hi, we’re looking for, um…” at which point he trailed off and looked expectantly at the kid the way parents usually do when they can’t remember which Percy Jackson book comes next, but instead the kid looked up at me and very brightly and firmly announced, “The Federalist Papers!”

I crack my fingers one by one and in turn they each start glowing neon green like a glow stick. I smile. You take a horrified step back as I crack my neck and back and my entire skeleton starts to light up.