Definitely 青森

We went to the first place I ever followed Bar Master and Shino-san to, two years ago. Had their famous curry ramen and drank a bit more...towards the end I hugged Shino-san goodbye. He told me I was like his daughter, and I replied "So...you won't marry me?" And he bashfully looked away laughing at me.

Bar Master took me home in his daiko for the last time...we hugged pretty tight and he shook my hand to which I then said 'I'll see you next Tuesday I swear! This isn't goodbye- just last daiko ride. Thank you for that always'

I told her how I only survived this semester because of her. She told me that out of all ALTs she works with I have the most game ideas, that I'm always willing to be genki for the kids, and that she's worried about what will come next with me gone. We talked about America, summer, moving and the students. We even gossiped a bit haha. And just....I'm gonna miss her. Every Tuesday and Thursday- I was so tired and I wanted it to end. But now that it's over, and so many of my 'rude lil ones' came up to say they enjoyed class and that they didn't want me to leave...and my co-teacher and me getting closer finally...it's almost a shame.

Today I had to say goodbye to my JHS of 16 months. I was with my 3rd years and they had to interview their ALT for a chapter project and I was in a separate room- laughing so hard with every other group that came in. At then end a few said "Thank you Ms.Kaitlyn, we love you!" "Don't forget us!" "See you- AGAIN!!"

I would come back to the main class and see this amazing chalk board art they made to say goodbye. 2 classes drew Yusuke from Yu Yu Hakusho (many asked in the interview about anime lolol) and agh one class drew me in my "Kaitlyn pose" and ahdjdvsj I sobbed so hard leaving today. Like...so hard.

Then- TO CHEER UP- I went to go see Jurassic world. I thought "I'll see Blue and Chris Pratt and some long necks living post trauma fron last time"....NOPE. LITERALLY KILLED ME LIKE THEY DID LAST TIME WITH THAT ONE SCENE. I have not felt this tired from crying in a while.

Omg…. I feel…so terrible? I had nothing but bad memories at my first JHS here. Like..it went to hell, particularly with the grade I taught with this teacher in. But like I did enjoy sitting across from her and talking during our off time, but there were other times that we had really awkward convos like ‘why do we allow bullying here? Why aren’t we doing something?’ And just a few other strong bad memories… But i taught her daughter in my first ES grade 6 class and I loved her. And this teacher and I really did have some solid conversations…towards the end we were kind of ok…and whenever i saw her i think she was kinda confused/hurt that I was so close with my other JHS JTE fron that year (drinking buddy level) and just…

This really…moved me? I’m confused almost if it’s sincere…but why would she go out of her way to find an old email exchange we had (xmas 2016 lesson) to message me of it wasn’t sincere?

I’m….so touched and feel so much lighter having some of that bad memory lifted by this….

Today I had to tell my 8th graders (2年生) that after next week- it's goodbye. Out of all my current schools and students, these kids were going to be the hardest ones to tell, so I told them first. I had various reactions.

I broke down in tears in front of my wild class, and I'm surprised to say so many of my boys started crying with me. Their HRT told me after to comfort a few in particular.

One class responded in silence. Like the sad vibes were strong and they just didn't know what to say.

Another class responded with surprise and a bit of rebellion? "Whhu whaat?? No! No! Why?" "Kaitlyn go- no!" "(She's not here until graduation??)" "( Are we getting a boy ALT next? Noo! I don't want that!)" "(I don't a girl either tho! Kaitlyn's cute!)" My teacher expained what my new job will be and they started clapping for me like they were proud of me 💖😭

I really bombed that university interview. I nailed the japanese work place part but the core- the lesson, which focuses on communication- straight up bombed it. I felt so out of my element when the interviewer asked me about my typical work day and I asked "Which one? Elementary or JHS?" And she said "Well letls focus on what's close to university level, so your oldest students in JHS"

Like that's the grade I have zero creative freedom with. That's the grade many JETs see the least of... I felt so envious of High School ALTs!!

I'm so preoccupied with teaching 3rd -6th grade lately I've forgotten how to teach my big kids. I'm nowhere near remotely ready for University level communication classes...

BUT THATS OKAY!

Someone asking me why I thought my major was a little nerve wracking. And I explained "It's International Studies...It basically tells you right there you can't stay in your hometown to pursue it."

I was so nervous in 2015 after I grabbed that diploma. Like wtf will I do with this? I get homesick so easy. How will I ever develop my life? Do I need to go abroad? WHO WILL HIRE ME??

And my 2nd years will always give an enthusiastic 'YEASSS' and clap/grin/etc.

It's lil things, like that and goofing off with them that makes me feel like this job is worth it? Yeah.

Also finally saw my fav boy from Elementary school who is now a 1st year. I walk up to the special classroom and he's literally standing at the door window grinning and bouncing and just so darn cute. My teacher asks him where this and that is for me to use and he bounds to go get anything we need and agh jeez. Good kids.