Star Trash💫

My 4:30am thots on the situation interpreted by my 1:30pm thots inspired by @gar-trek ‘s delightful post thank u for that king

Jim: If there was ever a man to give off cologne vibes, this is he. Sometimes absolutely overwhelming, but sometimes good. He wears different ones based off the names not really the scents (sidenote: he’s wearing some shit like “eros” by space versace or whatever tf during amok time) like symbolic in an absolutely subtle way that no one would ever even know to look for. Mans contains multitudes.

Spock: My guy smells sharp and like an aromatic kind of spicy. Ginger, cardamom, cloves, nutmeg…all the good shit, but very subtly. He’s chugging spiced tea all day so it’s part of his Essence now. Lbr you probably not gonna get close enough to smell him but it’s there. One can dream.

McCoy: Sorry folks this man works in a medical setting so he smells like the hospital; kinda like a mild dust and hint of industrial cleaner, but mostly like peppermint. He started sucking on mints in med school because the smells you smell hmm….very overwhelming sometimes. He doesn’t need em now but I think he just likes them. All around pleasant 10/10

Uhura: The best smelling of the entire crew without question. She smells like vanilla and honeysuckle on a warm spring day. Slightly floral and sweet, but not overwhelmingly so, more comforting than anything. Like being in a beautiful garden and watching the bees and butterflies flit around. 

Sulu: Literally no matter what this man always smells like galaxy old spice. He could’ve just finished fencing or been held hostage on some planet for days, it dont matter, he always smells fresh. Look at your man now back to him now back to your man now back to him. Sadly your man is not him. He’s on a horse.

Chekov: MUSTY. CHEKOV. RIGHTS. This man is in his early 20s there’s no way on god’s earth he smells good ever. I’m sorry stans but he’s just getting over teenage boy disease so he smells like interstellar axe with a hint of gym locker room. He probably thinks women like a man’s natural musk or something (a seduction technique invented in russia obvi). Honestly he’s too busy doing god knows what nonsense to shower most of the time but we love him all the same.

Captain James T Kirk