rise or die trying

“Of course I didn’t lie,” Autumn shook her head as she spoke. “I meant what I said. I would never choose anything else over you. You are my main priority,” she emphasized. She couldn’t tell if he believed a word she was saying. In an instant, she felt Jett’s fingers wrap tightly around her wrist as he shoved her hand away. Autumn frowned and looked back down to the floor. She could feel her eyes beginning to swell with tears. “Jett, please,” Autumn said softly. “You can’t say things like that to me,” she quickly wiped away a tear from her face. 

“You’re the only person I want to be with. I know no one can love me like you,” she looked up to him. “I would never push you aside for something, ever. Please, you need to know that,” she spoke, slowly moving closer toward him. “I love you so much it’s indescribable,” Autumn admitted. “And I know you’re probably right on this like you are about most things,” she softly added, taking another small step toward him. “It’s just, you need to consider how I’m feeling too. You’re asking me to do a very big thing here.” Autumn closed her eyes as she took in a deep breath. She knew that if it came down to it, she would do whatever it took to make Jett happy as that’s what mattered to her the most. “I love you so much,” she repeated, trying to reach out for his touch. “Could you just please try to see where I’m coming from?” she said in a low tone.

“I can’t say things like that to you?” Jett asked, a chuckle then escaping from his lips as he took a step towards her. “I can say whatever I want to you, Autumn.” He sneered at her, his lids dropping in order to try to meet her gaze. “Or have you forgotten that?” He asked as he reached forward, placing his index finger underneath her chin and forcing her to look up at him. It was the only touch he’d allow her in that moment; one that should reiterate where they stand.

Part of Torrell had been expecting the slap and he reacted quickly. He grabbed the arm that slapped him as she pulled it away, “You keep my mother’s name out of your mouth,” He snapped, “My mother taught me to treat people the way they treat me and she taught me not to be walked all over by nobles like you the way she was all her life,” He didn’t know what she knew about him. She wasn’t from here. Did she know he was just a bastard? He didn’t let go of her arm, “What did she say she was going to do? I need to look for her. Because if she’s not back before breakfast, don’t think I won’t keep it a secret that you wouldn’t tell me anything after you let her leave. They know I’m not meant to be with her until breakfast.”

“Air? Alright,” Torell turned to open the window for her and when he looked back, she was undoing her corset, “Maybe I should leave. You shouldn’t…” If someone walked in at this moment, who knows what it would look like? Not only that, he was a gentleman. He wouldn’t watch a woman get undressed. He averted his gaze. “I shouldn’t be around if you’re going to…”

The moment he grabbed her arm, Saylor flinched and tried to yank it from his grasp. “Let go!” She shouted at him, her voice cracking; showing her anger and sadness. She involuntarily began to whimper, tears streaming down her cheeks as he spoke to her. “Did she teach you to grab women and not let them go? Huh?” She spat at him. “I thought you were different.” Her voice shook as he let go of her. “You are all the same. Thinking every single women is just there to do the bidding of men; just an object to shout at when you’re not getting your way.” Her bottom lip puckered as she turned away from him, sinking to the ground.

Autumn enjoyed the feeling of Jett running his fingers through her dark locks. She smiled to herself as he called her Princess. She wished it could be like this all the time. “I know you do,” Autumn admitted as he lightly rested his chin on her. “I appreciate everything you do for me, really,” she answered quietly, speaking into his chest. Most of the time, Jett did know what was best for the both of them. Autumn almost never disagreed with any of his decisions. This situation was different, though. 

Autumn frowned as Jett pulled away from her when she asked him to consider what she was saying. She watched as he pulled out a bottle of scotch, pouring the alcohol into two glasses. Autumn looked down to the floor as he spoke sternly, asking her to convince him how she knew better than he did. Her gaze moved to the counter as he pushed the glass of alcohol toward her. “Jett, you know I can’t drink that,” she spoke without giving him any eye contact. There was no way she’d subject the baby to any amount of alcohol. “I’m not saying I know what’s best,” Autumn replied, now focusing her eyes on Jett. She slowly took a step forward to him. “I just don’t want to make a decision so fast that we–I possibly regret,” she corrected. He knew there wasn’t an ounce in him that would regret giving up their child. “I love you so much,” she whispered, moving closer to him, lightly caressing his arm. “I know this wasn’t supposed to happen and I’m sorry it did. It’s just, this is a product of our love and I can’t shake that feeling.”

Jett took another sip of the scotch as he watched her. “Well you could.” He said, shrugging his shoulders. “You just choose not to.” He let out a sigh as he sat the glass down on the counter. “Which tells me that you want to go against the decision we’ve already made.” HIs eyes hardened at her as he watched her gaze lower from him. He didn’t blame her, really. He knew he was hard to look at in times like this. 

His eyebrows knit together slightly when she apologized but came closer to him anyway. “It’s okay. I’m sorry…I–yeah.” Before he could open his mouth again, she was kneeling on her knees and placing her hands on his thighs, looking up at him. His erection pressed against his jeans and he could only imagine how good it would feel for her to take him into her mouth. They’re never blurred the lines before, always just friends, bordering on flirtatious gestures at times. But it’d never been anywhere close to this. At least, not when they were together anyway. When they were apart, he’d jerked off to thoughts of her many times. 

“I can’t say no to that,” he murmured quietly, his head tilting back slightly as he unbuttoned his jeans and pushed them down, then slowly shoved his boxers down so his erection sprang free. He bit his lip in anticipation and ran a hand through her soft hair. “Tell me you’ve thought about me like this too…” He was breathing rapidly. “Because I’ve been thinking about you for months. The pranks we’ve been playing. It’s not just pranks.” He knit his brows together in slight confusion as to what he was trying to say. “I genuinely, enjoy your presence…and sometimes I wonder…” he trailed off and closed his eyes.

“Don’t apologize.” She said with a smile as she adjusted herself on her knees. She ran her tongue over her plump lips as she sat back on her heels, watching as he unbuttoned his jeans and pushed them down. She let out a breath as she watched his length push free of the clothes and then she bit down on her bottom lip. “I have.” She nodded as her eyes flickered up to meet his. “More than once.” She admitted as she moved her hand forward, capturing his hard length between her fingers and moved her hand up and down slowly. 

“It’s just hard of a decision for me to make because I never thought I would ever have to deal with something like this. I thought if this were to ever happen to me I would automatically know what to do,” she whispered bitting her lip. Autumn focused her gaze on Jett as he spoke again. “Of course I love you,” she replied, raising a hand and placing it on his cheek. Her stomach dropped at his next sentence. “No, I would never choose anyone or anything else over you. You are my world,” Autumn answered fast, giving him a smile. She did not want to make Jett angry. She knew how he could get.

Autumn nodded slowly as he continued to speak. “I know I’m shocked from the news,” she spoke as Jett pulled her closer. “I know you know what’s best for the both of us,” Autumn agreed as he kissed her forehead again. She laid her head on his chest, disappointed and scared to say anything else that would go against what Jett was saying. Autumn took in a breath. She need to try at least one more time to get her point across in a way that would not make him any more angry, but that was a hard task to accomplish. “I know you’re right,” Autumn started, as she looked up at him, “but would you at least please consider what I’m saying? This is something that we both created and I just want to be sure of what we do regardless.”

“That’s why you’re not alone in this decision, Princess. It’s not just your decision to make, it’s mine as well.” He reminded her, gently running his fingers through her hair. “I think you know what you need to do, you’re just afraid to admit it to yourself.” His voice was soft as he glanced down towards her. “I better be, Princess. I do so much for you, don’t you know that?” He held her tightly against him, leaning his chin down to rest on the top of her head.

“It’s easy for you to say all this because you’re not the one actually carrying a child. I know you don’t want kids, we never planned on having kids. I’m aware of that,” Autumn replied. “But this sort of just… happened. And I don’t know what I want,” the words came out of her mouth slowly as she was scared to see Jett’s reaction.

She looked down as he kissed her forehead. “What if the time comes to give the baby away and I can’t bring myself to doing it? I don’t even know if I can get rid of it now,” she admitted. “How can you say that it’s out of the question? You’re telling me its okay to consider what you want only? What about me?” Autumn looked up at him. 

“Are you aware of that, Autumn? Because it seems as though this decision is hard for you. Which is shouldn’t be.” His voice was harsh as he glared down at her. “You don’t know what you want...” He repeated what she said and then let out a sigh. He pulled her head back a little so their eyes could meet. “You love me, don’t you, Autumn?” He tilted his head to the side. “I love you with all of my heart. I will never love someone as much as I love you.” He added. “But it seems as though you’re debating on choosing some clump of cells over me. And that makes me angry, Princess.” 

Autumn’s heart dropped as Jett held his grip on her tighter. As he lowered his face close to hers, she found it hard to look away from him as he spoke. She closed her eyes hard as he criticized her for even bringing up the idea. “I know how you feel about kids, Jett. I don’t even know if I want them either. It’s just that I at least thought we could consider it,” she meekly answered, trying to avoid eye contact.

Her gaze rose as he said he would only support her if she gave it away. “But, how is that fair?” she spoke quietly as to not upset him. “You’re telling me you won’t be there for me if I decide to keep it?” Autumn questioned. “This is a big decision, I just thought we could go over all our options.”

He let out a sigh as he heard her speak. So naive. He thought to himself as he brought up a hand, brushing his fingers gently over her silky smooth cheek. “So we are in agreement, then. Neither of us want kids.” He said as he stared down at her. There was no way in hell he was going to let her keep the child. 

Autumn closed her eyes as Jett wiped away a few of her tears. She smiled lightly as he kissed her forehead, wishing he could have been this supportive from the beginning. Jett’s hand still rested on the back of her head and Autumn could see Jett was willingly to go with the first idea she had mentioned. She knew he didn’t want kids, but Autumn wasn’t so sure of herself. Moments later, Autumn felt her hair tighten in his grip. She knew this wasn’t going to go down well.

“Well, I know neither of us ever planned for anything like this and who knows if we’d even be ready to, but…” Autumn bit her lip, nervous to see Jett’s reaction. “But what if we kept it?” she suggested. It was no use trying to avoid eye contact with him, she was caught in his grasp. “I know it sounds crazy, but shouldn’t we at least consider it?”

“Looks like you’re about to find out, aren’t you?” She grinned in response, raising her arms so that he could pull her shirt off of her svelte frame and toss it to the floor with the rest of their growing trail of clothing. Lo leaned in for another kiss, moving her hands behind her back so that she could unzip the back of her skirt. She pushed the fabric down her hips, kicking it away with her heels until she could finally press her half-naked body into his. The only thing separating them now was her silky panties and his underwear. The blonde sighed against his lips as she leaned in for another kiss, allowing her hands time to explore his broad shoulders and the chiseled lines of his strong chest. “God, I should have done this sooner.”

Andrew almost couldn’t believe any of this was happening. Almost. He had thought of it, and dreamt of it, numerous times but he didn’t think he’d actually get a chance to be with Lo. He let out a breath as he watched her unzip her skirt and push it to the side. “You are the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen in my life.” Andrew said in a low tone of voice as he wrapped his arms around her waist, pulling her closer to him. “Well I’m glad it’s happening now and not later.” Andrew whispered against her lips, a hand coming up to cup the back of her head. “I’m going to take my time with you, Lo.” He moved his lips down to her chin, to her jawline and then to her neck. “By the time we are finished, you’re going to wish that I’m the one you went for.” 

Not skulking, yeah right. He’d been watching her on the security cameras for probably an hour. He knew exactly who she was but he wasn’t really concerned about her sneaking around, in fact it made him curious about who knew she was here. Did she tell anyone she was coming, was she sent by someone. So interesting, he was curious if he had actually nabbed her when her guard was down how long would it take for someone to find her? Many questions he probably would not be getting answers to, how unfortunate.  He stepped toward her, god she was a terrible liar, he couldn’t believe she was ever a decent liar if a grab like that startled her into a horrid lie like that. “Sorry, no phone at the house.” He said with a smile. Which was true, there was no land line at the house just the cell phone that was in his pocket, “There’s a gas station down the street, I’m sure they’d let you use the phone.” 

Seeing her eyes cast towards a man who was speaking quite closely to his younger sister Bethany, a sigh escapes him. Bethany was a boyfriend stealer, and she often had all the men fonding over her, battling for her affection so when he saw that she was talking with Freyja’s boyfriend, he cleared his throat, silently reminding himself that he would have to have a talk with this guy who was obviously too old for his baby sister. “Sidetracked, eh?” he finally speaks after a long, awkward silence. “Yeah, definitely looks like it. Looks like he’ll be face deep under her dress by the end of the night too.” he hated thinking like that about his much younger sister, but he grumbled afterwards, obviously just as angry as Freyja was with the pair of them. When she ordered something strong, Dorian couldn’t help but chuckle a bit. “Yeah uh… Bring me a extra hard rum and coke and two pieces of buffalo chicken pizza. I ordered pizza a bit ago, because this food is just too small to fill me up.”

Freyja frowned at Dorian’s statement, her chest tightening with anger as her eyes flickered towards her boyfriend and the young, tiny thing he was flirting with. “You think?” She grumbled angrily as she tore her eyes away from the scene. He will be. She knew Dorian was right. “Guess there’s nothing I can do to stop his wandering eyes and hands.” She let out a dramatic sigh as she draped her right leg across her left. If he was going to have his own fun, then she would too.

Autumn gave in to Jett caressing her hair. She enjoyed the closeness. Hearing his instruction, Autumn inhaled slowly, holding in her breath for a few seconds before she exhaled. The breathing technique helped for a minute, but Autumn soon became riddled with anxiety once more. She felt Jett’s hand wrap around her wrist preventing her from hiding her tears. Closing her eyes hard, her neck moved forward as Jett titled her head back. After a few moments, she focused her hazel hues on him feeling her eyes swell with tears again. He was right, she couldn’t hide how she felt.

“I don’t know,” Autumn whispered, feeling her voice crack again. She had never pictured herself being in this scenario. “I mean, we could get rid of it,” she suggested. She assumed that’s what Jett would’ve wanted, but Autumn wasn’t so sure on what she wanted just yet. Could she actually picture herself going through with something like that? “Or maybe this could be a good thing,” she mentioned with tears rolling down her cheek.

He tilted her head back until she was looking right up at him. Her hazel eyes blurry with tears and that only made Jett smile. She was so adorable when she cried. He released her wrist and lifted his hand to brush away some of the tears from her cheek. “Now, now, darling, no need to cry.” He said in a soothing voice as he leaned forward and kissed her on the forehead.