Kinky Horror

On April 5, 1973, Vincent Price ushered us into the... "Theatre of Blood!" This coal-black comedy features priceless Vincent as a ham who likes his critics well-cooked! Featuring a cast of distinguished British actors, Price picks 'em off with methods ripped straight from the plays of Shakespeare. Witty, wild, and wicked, "Theatre of Blood" is Bard brutality at its barbaric best! The SLAY's the thing! 

On  April 5, 1926, the incomparable Roger Corman was born! Without even a kernel of doubt, we proclaim that Corman is one of the most important figures in film history. The great man pioneered indie filmmaking, brought the works of several venerated foreign masters to the States, launched the careers of EVERYONE (Martin Scorsese, Jack Nicholson, James Cameron, and Francis Ford Coppola are just a few of the graduates from the Corman Film School), and has produced/directed some of the most eXXXquisite genre movies that cinema has to offer. His Poe films are among the best Gothic thrillers in eXXXistence, skillfully marrying shock-show tactics with arthouse techniques. Corman’s best is divine, and his worst is just fine! The man is an absolute giant, and he will always be a true icon of the moving picture. Long live King Corman!

On April 1, 1883, the great Lon Chaney was born! Chaney was and always shall be cinema’s greatest boogyman. With primitive materials and tremendous ability, he transformed himself into the most beautifully bizarre beings in the history of the medium. Master of makeup and maker of monsters, Chaney was the horror film’s first true icon; a genre star before there was even a genre. As a result of having been born to deaf-mute parents, Chaney mastered non-verbal communication and possessed an innate compassion for those with disabilities; both qualities are reasons why Chaney remains an enduring figure in pop culture. Throughout his career, Chaney played a wide variety of misfits, monsters, and madmen, all of whom he brought to life with ingenious makeup of his own creation.  His characters were grotesque in appearance, but Chaney endowed them with depth and pathos. Even his most sinister creations had an endearing sensitivity to them; Lon saw the beauty in the beast. Don’t step on that spider… it might be Lon Chaney!

On March 8, 1972, we witnessed the shocking suspense of... "Tales from the Crypt!" Based on the lyrically lurid EC Comics stories, this Amicus anthology features some of the most potent chills in British cinema. While all of the segments are strong, "And All Through the House" and "Poetic Justice" are absolutely legendary and set the standard for all subsequent holiday horror flicks. Marvelously morbid! 

On March 8, 1964, "The Last Man on Earth" was not alone! Based on the seminal shocker by Richard Matheson, the film eXXXplores the ho-rror of isolation... and of mutant vampires, of CORPSE! The majestic Vincent Price received the rare opportunity to play the hero... or did he? Though far from perfect, "The Last Man on Earth" is a worthy adaptation of the novel with a few genuinely unnerving sequences. Plus, it essentially created the modern zombie film, and that's pretty darn boss! 

On March 8, 1967, Rankin-Bass invited us to their "Mad Monster Party!" This stop-motion creature feature features creatures from ho-rror's creepiest cl-ass-sicks! Dracula, Frankenstein, The Invisible Man, and The Hunchback of Notre Dame are just a few of the distinguished delinquents at this sinister soirée! Groovy tunes, ghoul gags, and awesome monster designs make this one an all-timer. Eat, drink, and be scary at the "Mad Monster Party!"

IT'S ALLLLIIIIVVVVEEEE!!!

I scream! You scream! We all scream for FRANKENSTEIN! In this fearfully frigid commercial featuring fabulous Frank, an angry mob (of CORPSE!) hunts Ol' Flathead and his creator. Nothing can stop Frankie from escaping... eXXXcept the rich taste of Magnum ice cream! With production design and makeup better than any recent Universal monster film, this one's a graveyard smash! 

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies:

He's there...

We sing a song in your head of another phreaky Phantom! In this seldom-seen shocker, Maximilian Schell dons the mask and pursues the woman he believes to be his lost love (it's Phantom by way of "The Mummy"). In gorgeously gruesome makeup designed by Stan Winston, the Phantom brings down the house... well, the chandelier, anyway! Listen to the haunting music of "The Phantom of the Opera," the 1983 TV version!

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

I ho-pe you're hungry for ho-rror, because you're invited to an evening of creep cuisine with the man who puts the "gore" in "gourmet," Vincent Price! In this delectable deviation from "The Price of Fear" radio show, Ol' Vinnie shares an anecdote regarding some unusual dining eXXXperiences. It doesn't taste like chicken... and this one certainly isn't for chickens! Savor the flavor of... "The Specialty of the House!"

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies:

Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

Vampires and werewolves may be ancient enemies, but there's one thing that they agree on: cereal promotion. In this 1994 commercial for Count Chocula, the milk-sucking fangster promotes his then-new gimmick, werewolf marshmallows! It sure was a swell addition, but it does make you wonder whatever happened to Fruit Brute... (I heard he got a job as a disc jockey.)

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies:

Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

We're just nutty about the great comedy duos: Abbott and Costello, Nichols and May, and, of CORPSE, Karloff and Price. In this dreadfully delightful skit from "The Red Skelton Hour," Phibes and Frankenstein commit the most ghastly atrocity of their careers: a musical number. It's a wonderful little tune that's sure to raise the dead! 

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies:

Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

Shave and a haircut... Two slits! For this monstrous Monday, we've decided to pamper you... To death! There won't be any songs to be sung, but you will be receiving the best ham in 1930s England! Starring the aptly-named Tod Slaughter, it's the tonsorial terror of... "Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street!"

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies:

On February 22, 1899, the sensationally sinister Dwight Frye was born! Known for his portrayals of madmen and minions, the fearsome Frye often stole the show with his unnerving energy. The Man with the Thousand-Watt Stare robbed graves in "Frankenstein" and ate flies in "Dracula,"  contributing some eXXXceptional eccentricity to already-odd motion pictures. A true icon of fear, Frye even inspired one of Alice Cooper's greatest songs. We gotta get outta here!

Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

Are you ready for a history lesson? Then give let Christopher Lee bite... your apple! It's positively putrid  class on the most sanguinary subject of them all, Dracula! Under Prince Lee's tutelage, you shall learn the shocking secrets of Dracula's past! (Imagine "Dracula Untold" but good.) Prepare your brains for...

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

Ho-wdy, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

The Price is F-right with this week's groovy movie! Ever had your palm RED? Then let Vincent Price read your future in this sickly scream-story! It's pure POE-try as Prince Vince tries to corrupt a young woman in a plague-ridden kingdom. Prepare for the scarlet scares of... "The Masque of the Red Death!"

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

In ho-nor of Black History Month, we are going to present one of the most important vampire pictures ever made, "Blacula." I'm sure you've heard of it: the tit-le has become something of a pop culture punchline, and it would be a lie to say that it's not a wonderfully ridiculous tit-le. When you hear "Blacula," you eXXXpect ether a bargain-basement schlock-shocker (watch "Blackenstein" for that) or a provocative parody designed to offend. The second most shocking thing about "Blacula" is that it is neither one of those things. The most shocking? Well, it's actually a damn good ho-rror film!

"Blacula" tells the tragic tale of Mamuwalde, an African Prince who is bitten by Count Dracula in 1780. The unfortunate Manuwalde is turned into a vampire and locked in a coffin. After many decades of dreamless slumber, Manuwalde is inadvertently released from his coffin in Los Angeles, 1972. Manuwalde soon discovers Tina, the woman he believes to be the reincarnation of his lost wife, Luva. Bloodthirsty and hot-blooded, Manuwalde seeks the love of his afterlife.

While "Blacula" was being developed, William Marshall worked with the producers to give the eponymous neck-biter the dignity a great vampire deserves. Blacula's real name was changed from "Andrew Brown" to "Mamuwalde," and his character received the previously recounted backstory. It's important to note Marshall's involvement in the creative process because it proves just ho-w invested he was in the part.

 Marshall was a Shakespearean actor, and he shaped Blacula into a Shakespearean figure. With his stentorian delivery and eXXXalted bearing, Marshall was simply majestic in a part that could've been played for cheap laughs. His Mamuwalde was truly a monarch of the undead; a stately demon with the manners of an angel. In my book, William Marshall is up there with Bela Lugosi and Christopher Lee. "Blacula" is a silly name (the name given to him by Dracula himself), but Blacula is not a silly monster.

The film itself is an engaging chiller that successfully transfers Hammer histrionics to the groovy '70s. Heck, Hammer couldn't even accomplish that: just give "Dracula A.D. 1972" a watch! Sure, some effects may betray a lack of funds, but the direction and script are worthy of their vampire. We could go on... but we think you ought to just see for yourself! Without any further a-BOO, we proudly present... "Blacula!"

Check it out, Ho-rror Ho-mies!

On February 14, 1931, "Dracula" rose from the grave! Tod Browning's supernatural shocker brought vampire ho-rror to Ho-llywood cinema. Fog-thick atmosphere and Gothic production design make this one a macabre marvel, but Bela Lugosi elevates it to legendary status. With sartorial elegance and haunting charisma, Lugosi became the definitive vampire, inspiring 90 years worth of impressions and Halloween costumes. Even today, this "Dracula" still holds eerie power!