Feet on Solid Ground

Where do you want them, baby?

I… okay. Gimme them trouty lips, then.

Where do you want them, baby?

Stop it, you know you are. I’ve seen you checking yourself out in the mirror. Just for you, sweetheart.

Well I have, but it's been to make sure I'm keeping my muscle tone up and keeping the baby fat off and stuff.  I want to kiss your cute lips so bad right now.

Mmm hot.  Do I get to see you in them?  Or is that for later?

Me neither! Oh, dude, as soon as possible! And alright, I’ll take the opportunity to show you the Batman undies I bought.

Mmm hot.  Do I get to see you in them?  Or is that for later?

Ireland would be amazing! Oh my gosh, I’m gonna start planning right the fuck now. Oh, and packing too, ‘cause that’ll take me a few hours by itself.

Yeah!  I've never been there, so it's the best place to go!  When do you wanna go?  I can help you pack, baby.

Fuck. Yes. When and where?!

Well if you want car sex, then somewhere we can drive.  Maybe Ireland!

Yes!!! I need to focus, rude!

Alright, if you say so.

I think that it’s worth it for the caffeine, honestly.

You could always drink something like (sugar-free) Red Bull?

Fuck off, you’re doing this on purpose. Meanie.

Maybe I am...do you want me to stop?

I brush three times a day and whiten my teeth a lot. It’s definitely worth it.

Ooh, well you'd have to with all that coffee, haha.  I don't drink enough of it to have to worry about that.

I don’t know all of them, but I do drink a ridiculous amount of coffee.

But then how do you keep your teeth so white?

You know all the hobbit meals? That’s pretty much my coffee schedule.

I know some of them, like elevensies or whatever.

Screw you, you know I do. How was your day, man? What did you do?

Or maybe naked would be better?

I think that I might actually have a problem when it comes to coffee. I haven’t gone more than a few hours without it since high school.

Really?!  You drink it that much?!