Like the crab??

mommy needs her head smashed in with a brick

*trying to pitch public transportation to Americans* it’s like a legal form of texting while driving

the mexican football team has a 17 yrs old player and one of the funniest outcomes of this is that he cannot appear in any ad for gambling or drinking so he only appears in candy and milk advertisements. his first world cup and he's not even legally allowed to drive. his nickname is "morita" (little berry). he's three apples tall.

i know the death note is supposed to be a cautionary tale but. just give it to me. it would make all of this so much easier

after a few months they would just run out of guys to make president. nobody would wanna do it they'd be like i don't want to get a heart attack no thank you

i know absolute power corrupts absolutely or whatever but i think we can trust tooie with this one its fineeee.

im literally green

i bet it feels good to be an underwater plant just swaying in sync with the flow of water

You know that thing would eat you if you died, right? *pointing to the false image of you that others perceive*