killing me instantly

i hope Luke Skywalker walks into a vibrant antique shop and slaps a glow stick onto my waist, killing me instantly

i hope Gary Oak walks into a double-decker bus and flails a hand bag at my left hand, killing me instantly

i hope Osomatsu walks into city hall and bashes a pair of socks behind my forehead, killing me instantly

i hope Tina Belcher walks into city hall and stabs a football through my right nostril, killing me instantly

i hope Gene Belcher walks into space and shoots a quilt into my nose, killing me instantly

i hope Black Widow walks into my apartment building, but not my specific apartment, and taps a scythe into my left ankle, killing me instantly

i hope Simba walks into my spaceship and swings a chapter book beside my right nipple, killing me instantly

i hope Batman walks into a silent library and punches a matchbook into my ring finger, killing me instantly

i hope Daytrader Vader walks into a haunted house and smacks a catalogue by my eyelashes, killing me instantly

i hope Tien, or Chiaotzu, walks into the county bank and blasts a broken CD into my left hip, killing me instantly

i hope Mei, or Zarya, walks into a pleasant tea party and swings a small pouch against my right arm, killing me instantly

i hope Captain Kirk walks into a tv studio and shoots a basketball across my right shoulder, killing me instantly

i hope Drake, or Josh, walks into the county bank and whacks a toy boat behind my right wrist, killing me instantly

i hope Widowmaker walks into my future and pokes a clothes pin over my right eye, killing me instantly

i hope Junko Enoshima walks into the White House and kicks a flyswatter into my nose, killing me instantly

i hope John Connor walks into Build-A-Bear Workshop and snaps an eraser against my left leg, killing me instantly

i hope Gandalf walks into a fancy restaurant and blasts a spool of thread behind my right nostril, killing me instantly