20s / French / Humor, Art, Cats, social issues, BG3, COD MW2, DATV, LADS and the occasional fanfic. Header by esteljun. Anti-social pessimist. /!/I barely tag anything (nsfw, spoilers...) Random depression/anxiety-related posts./!/
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there should be a term for characters you personally don't care about but you defend them anyways because the way people treat them is really uncomfortable. like ok this is a very middle-of-the-road character for me but the fandom's either been super misogynistic, racist, etc. about them or harassed innocent people who try to genuinely explore that character warts and all, and i find that more annoying than the actual character.
the term should by 'my client', like you're a lawyer defending your client that you are completely indifferent to but you are obligated by your job (or your morals) to defend
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Important research for a story I'm writing! Not real life, never real life.
You are transported back in time and into the body of a young noblewoman in the 1400s. Your parents have married you off to an awful, abusive, rapist husband whom literally no one else would marry despite him being very high nobility because he's that terrible. You successfully produce a baby boy and then plan to murder this man for the good of everyone and yourself. Here is the question: do you think you could murder him in a way that is undetectable to the historical people around you? Note: they aren't stupid, you are the prime suspect as the battered wife AND you can't just say poison. Where are you going to buy poison? Do you know anything about poison actually? NO GOOGLING! You were sent back without a plan!
Do you think you could murder someone in the 1400s and get away with it with your modern know-how?
Yes, I totally have a plan (tell me for research purposes)
No, I realize that I'm very uninformed about murder
I have some ideas but I'm not sure they would work
Remaining time: 3 days 5 hours
Edit: my notes are full of murder. I love you all
Edit: to clarify about the poison, you can use poison if you actually know how to identify it, I'm saying you can't just go "Poison!" with no knowledge about poison. Buying it probably means they know that poison and you're caught. Your personal knowledge when you read this post is all you have.
Another point of clarity: You went through all that trouble to have a baby without modern medicine so you could get the sweet house after your husband died. That's why you can't be caught. No disappearing.
Edit again: Air embolisms are going on a high shelf because the syringe won't be invented for 350 years. Prove to me that you could make one from scratch, lol
So after reading a lot of murder plans in the notes, here are some of my reactions:
I think pushing a drunk man off something is a super bad idea. If he's not as drunk as you think or you aren't as strong as you think (noblewomen aren't known for strength), you are royally fucked. Also, I remember learning once that drunk people often survive car crashes because their muscles are relaxed, so he might just roll down and be fine (I guess that's okay, but ineffective)
Same with pillow smothering, it takes a long time to smother someone and if he comes to and fights you off, you are also doomed. Also, fun fact, people who are asleep will fight smothering involuntarily
There is a lot of confidence about poison. I don't know, even if you can identify a poison, can you really microdose it effectively? Also, I feel like people might be ignoring the "noblewoman" part. You aren't preparing his food, you have servants for that, so this would be hard
I didn't specify the location on purpose, because I wanted people to just imagine whatever place they are most familiar with.
On a funnier note, I got called out for not knowing foxglove. I live in Canada and it's not native to my country, so no, I can't identify foxglove. Also, when I go on hikes, I've got a razor sharp eye for raspberries and trilliums and that's about it. I'm not trying to poison anyone in my everyday life.
I'm changing my answer, because I was still thinking like I'm in 2026.
Humors! I just need to convince him his humors are out of balance and he needs to have a round or seven of blood letting, or purging, or laxatives to loosen his bowels.
Before the computing era, ILM was the master of oil matte painting, making audiences believe that some of the sets in the original Star Wars and Indiana Jones trilogy were real when they werenβt. They were the work of geniuses like Chris Evans, Michael Pangrazio, Frank Ordaz, Harrison EllenshawΒ and Ralph McQuarrieΒ !Β Forever thank you, to their handmade art and the work of their colleagues, that made us dream of impossible worlds and fantastic places across Earth and the Universe.
There are more background paintings on this article, featuring comments by the masters/artists themselves !Β
Some of the following pieces were made by other artists 2:
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Happy pride month to my dad. When I came out as bi to him, this man googled what it ment, look at me and said "ohh. Yeah. You get that from me. You'd have far more siblings of I only shaged women." And went right back to his work emails.
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