Dancing with a Ghost

Not really

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He's a little surprised when Hunter's voice, thick with sleep sounds from the spot on the bed next to him. Kieran doesn't know if he's dreaming or if he's not but something tells him that the dream was over and he was back safely in reality. It had been the same dream for the past week, he had woken up much like he had tonight, sweating, nauseous and terrified. It had been happening so frequently that he now had a small garbage can on the side of his bed and a glass of water to help rinse the taste out of his mouth. It happens quick this time, with Hunter's hand on his back, his stomach drops, and he's suddenly dizzy, gripping the garbage can tightly. His stomach is violently expelling stuff this time, and the trembling only stops when he's finished. "Yeah...." Is all he offers before turning to rest his head against the male's neck. "It's the same one...every night." He admits after a moment of silence "They just...look at me...like I'm a prize..." the shaking starts again but the warmth of Hunter's body makes it stop shortly after. Kieran knew what they had between them. A silent agreement of nothing more than passing glances and nights shared in pleasure but in moments like this, he couldn't help feeling like their agreement was stupid but that was merely because he wanted some hold him and tell him it wasn't real, because to him, it was.

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Tawnya sighed and chewed her lip. “I know that but I was hoping to be married and finished with college first.” She stood up and dumped the glass of water out as she thought about the future. “We should try to get some more sleep.”

Kieran sighs softly. He’s never understood planning, has always gone with the flow when life decided to give or take something from him. “I suppose we’ll figure it out as we go” 

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Tawnya chuckled and nodded. “I meant a month…I’m still getting used to the idea that I am going to be a mother.” She chewed her lip and went to sit at the table. “I have not even been able to tell Mum and Dad yet.” She looked up at him. She had felt that she was finally becoming more independent and now she was going to be in charge of another life. “Do you think I can do this?” 

“I believe so. You have eight months to prepare” He teases, groaning softly as the feeling in his stomach returns but then quickly goes away. “You’re old enough to start having children if we’re being honest with ourselves. Most people have kids at this age, it’s rare to find a twenty-five year old being a new parent in the twenty-first century.”

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Kieran sucked at hiding his feelings when he was anxious, especially to women. He didn’t know why it was easier for him to open up to girls but he found it a lot easier. “It’s kind of scary. Though Kit is only have one”

Tawnya smiled and nodded. “It’s terrifying, and I’m only a week along.”She took a deep breath and thought looking into his eyes. “We can’t syke ourselves out. We need to take each issue as they come and not create them.” she smiled and shrugged.

"Technically you're four" Kieran offers a smile on attempts to soothe his anxiety. Life seemed to be throwing a lot at him recently. With heightened arousal, body temperature and instincts he felt like he could lash out at any moment. The dreams were the worst however, it was the same one every night, and either Troy or Hunter and now tawnya had had to hold him through the puking.

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“You’re funny” Kieran mocks, pushing into her shoulder. The thought of having two or more babies because it ran on both sides was terrifying. He would go from a dad of one to a dad of three within months and he has to laugh to stop the bitterness “let’s hope when we go for our first scan they find one heartbeat”

Tawnya gulped and nodded. “Have you seen how skinny I am? I don’t think my hips can handle more than one kid.” She chuckled nervously and sighed wrapping her shoulders over her shoulders. “I am sure we can handle whatever life throws at us.” She was just as terrified but hoped she was better at hiding it.

Kieran sucked at hiding his feelings when he was anxious, especially to women. He didn't know why it was easier for him to open up to girls but he found it a lot easier. "It's kind of scary. Though Kit is only have one"

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“Only the ones you grope in public yeah?” He laughs softly resting back against his couch. It wasn’t the most ideal way to spend his night but he usually stayed up pretty late. “I’m glad you slept with me, you might hate me come delivery but..”

Tawnya chuckled and shook her head. “I don’t know what got into me… but I had not been intimate with anyone in a while.” She bit her her lip and kissed his cheek. “I am glad I slept with you too, and I know. I watched a video of my birth once… and multiples run in my family.” 

"You're funny" Kieran mocks, pushing into her shoulder. The thought of having two or more babies because it ran on both sides was terrifying. He would go from a dad of one to a dad of three within months and he has to laugh to stop the bitterness "let's hope when we go for our first scan they find one heartbeat"

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Kieran bites his lip “You can stay…if you want. We’ve shared a bed before” he murmurs, gazing toward the window. Trying to convince himself that it had just been a dream was harder than he believed. “I could walk you if you really want to go home. Probably won’t sleep for awhile..”

Tawnya blushed and looked down at the floor. “I can stay. I know it’s really dark outside.” She chuckled and looked into his eyes. “You know… i’m don’t make it a habit of sleeping with random men.” 

"Only the ones you grope in public yeah?" He laughs softly resting back against his couch. It wasn't the most ideal way to spend his night but he usually stayed up pretty late. "I'm glad you slept with me, you might hate me come delivery but.."

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Kieran smiles “I know a thing or two about pregnancy and children. My ex-intimate, when she was pregnant she had to drag me to appointments and classes. I should have paid more attention to the fevers in infants part though” it’s a soft sad laugh but a laugh nonetheless. “I think we’ll do fine”

Tawnya stood on her toes and kissed his forehead. “I think so… if we do all this together.” She blushed softly. “I’m not saying we need to be a couple but we’re equal partners in this.” She chuckled softly. “I should head home, it’s late.”

Kieran bites his lip "You can stay...if you want. We've shared a bed before" he murmurs, gazing toward the window. Trying to convince himself that it had just been a dream was harder than he believed. "I could walk you if you really want to go home. Probably won't sleep for awhile.."

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Kieran laughs bitterly “my father sent me to a childhood psychologist when I was seven because the dreams would cause me to leave the house unattended in the middle of the night… I’d come home in the morning and not remember if I had been dreaming or awake the entire time.” He says, finally placing the black bin back where it came from for the time being. “How’re feeling?”

Tawnya nodded as she moved over to get him a glass of water. “I’m okay… now that I have had a couple days to adjust to the idea of being pregnant.” She chewed her lip as she handed him the glass. “I’m kind of terrified of screwing this up but I think I can do this.” She kissed his cheek. “Is there any way I can help, with the dreams?” 

Kieran smiles "I know a thing or two about pregnancy and children. My ex-intimate, when she was pregnant she had to drag me to appointments and classes. I should have paid more attention to the fevers in infants part though" it's a soft sad laugh but a laugh nonetheless. "I think we'll do fine"

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Kieran grabs a dish towel from the stove and uses it against it mouth, placing it down before gagging again as the feeling drops in his stomach. Out of breath, he looks toward the young girl and bites his lip “I sometimes have extremely vivid dreams which warrant a physical reaction…” He murmurs, hanging his head over the garbage can as a safety precaution. “I probably look how you feel” he smiles, reaching out to press his hand against her stomach.

Tawnya smiled and ran a hand through his hair. “I’m okay. I have been drinking ginger tea since i realized it was morning sickness.” She shrugged and licked her lips. “I could make some for you.” She felt his head sighing. She really was not good at taking care of people but she needed to learn quickly. “Have you talked to someone about getting help for your dreams?” 

Kieran laughs bitterly "my father sent me to a childhood psychologist when I was seven because the dreams would cause me to leave the house unattended in the middle of the night... I'd come home in the morning and not remember if I had been dreaming or awake the entire time." He says, finally placing the black bin back where it came from for the time being. "How're feeling?"

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“Tawnya?” He mutters sleepily, eyes dragging over her face. Kieran can’t remember when he had a dream that vivid before and ask soon as the feeling of falling comes back he gets up from bed, knees a little wobbly and heads for the bathroom, only making it to the kitchen before emptying his stomach.

Tawnya got up and followed him. She smoothed out her shirt and her hair as she walked over and rubbed his back. She could not claim to understand what he was going through but she wanted to be there for him. “Let it all out and then we’ll talk if you need to… or want to.”

Kieran grabs a dish towel from the stove and uses it against it mouth, placing it down before gagging again as the feeling drops in his stomach. Out of breath, he looks toward the young girl and bites his lip "I sometimes have extremely vivid dreams which warrant a physical reaction..." He murmurs, hanging his head over the garbage can as a safety precaution. "I probably look how you feel" he smiles, reaching out to press his hand against her stomach.

Tawnya moaned as she turned over to look at him. He was thrashing around worrying her. She had come over ot talk and they had fallen to sleep as it got later. She smiled as she sat up and laid a hand on his cheek. “Kieran? wake up.” 

"Tawnya?" He mutters sleepily, eyes dragging over her face. Kieran can't remember when he had a dream that vivid before and ask soon as the feeling of falling comes back he gets up from bed, knees a little wobbly and heads for the bathroom, only making it to the kitchen before emptying his stomach.