soft love.

“ i think, i — ” mouth shuts immediately, impeding her confession. “ it’s nothing. forget i said anything, ” cheeks burn bright red, chest afflicted by tension. a groan surges, frame shaking dramatically before she speaks again. “ fuck it — yeah. i think i like you ... a little bit. ”

words catch him completely off guard, a soft chuckle escaping his lips as dark hues flicker down familiar features. " you like me ? " considering they had been sleeping together for the past few months, he hadn't exactly expected her to actually voice the shift in their dynamic. not out loud, anyway. "define like." he wasn't exactly the type for serious commitments, though if he's being honest, she's the only girl he's been giving his undivided attention to for longer than a single weekend.

“ i'm fine, ” but a hiss comes past brims as felix sits on the couch, hand instinctively landing by his left flank, over bruised ribs. “ that cat on the tree put up a real fight. ” jests, as though lungs aren't filled with smoke.

"you don't look fine," manicured brows frown slightly as she takes in her brother's best friend, stepping closer until she can hear the slight rattle in his chest. "you're breathing like a broken accordion," she points out softly, tilting her head to the side. "are you sure there's nothing i can do for you? — maybe some water for starters?" 

the way he practically ignores her request to move closer before feeling his lips linger against her foreheads pulls a soft giggle from her lips. with a hum, the blonde stands straight fully now, even pressing up on her tiptoes to lean a little closer. "you're not getting away that easy." petite hands caress his cheeks, thumbs brushing beneath his warm hues to see the dark circles. the exhaustion clinging to him and it pulls a small pout to her lips. it happens too often and she wishes she could do more, but she also knows having a baby cry in the middle of the night isn't help any, either. still, this is her family and the two of them is all she wants. "you're gonna let me take care of you tonight." this time, she leans up to press a soft, lingering kiss to his lips, only pulling back after seconds pass. "go see our little boy and get washed up, gray. you'll have food waiting for you when you're all done."

she's an angel. has always been. even when they were just teenagers and he was entirely too reckless for his own good. the blonde had been the one constant light in his life, and not much had changed since then. "i don't deserve you," he murmurs against her lips, lingering in her space just for a second longer. before he finally pulls away, his alrge hands give her waist a gentle, appreciative squeeze. "hope you made something good," he teases, easy smile finally breaking through the tired lines of his face. he does exactly what he's told. walks quietly down the hall, steps softening as he appraches the nursery that had been slowly decorating. peeking inside, his chest tightens with that familiar wathm at the sight of his sound sleeping soundly, a perfect, quiet reminder of exactly what he's fighting for every single day. it's not after a long moment of watching him breathe, that he steps away to wash the grime of the day off his skin, eager to get back to the blonde waiting for him in the kitchen.

it doesn't feel like there's any need to point out the fact that it's not like her to do something like that. really, it's not even something he should be focused on because he shouldn't know that little detail about her, but he does. she's not the type, but he also understands why she would if things have been like this for a while. "why didn't you say anything to me sooner?" the question slips out before he can stop it and his head shakes at the thought. because he doesn't have a doubt that she went to her best friend about whatever has been going on with her dad and her parents in general, but the two of them aren't as close as she is with charlotte. in fact, he's not sure he's ever had a friendship as close as the one they have. swallowing thickly, his deep blue hues lift from the spot he's seen her staring at, soon taking in the frustration and anger, even the sadness lacing her features. "what did she say when you brought it up to her?"

his question catches her off guard, pearly whites sinking into her full bottom petal as she tries to come up with an answer. but the truth is, she doesn't know why. maybe because she was ashamed of what she had found out, maybe because she didn't want to believe it and saying it out loud would make it real. " i wanted to, i just .. i guess i couldn't bring myself to say the words." offers him a small shrug, finally tearing her gaze away from the carpet to look up at him. "if i told you, it would mean my family was actually falling apart, and i .. i wasn't ready to face that." still wasn't. slender fingers continue their restless, anxious twitching against the fabric of her jeans before she curls them into her palm. "she said she was sorry," a bitter laugh escapes her, and the mere memory of the blue eyed girl makes makes her want to completely break down all over again. "but her being sorry doesn't fix it. doesn't fix anything."

"he did what?" his tone is rough, voice dropping as his gaze narrows while taking her in. the way she shakes, the way she's stepping into the office and pushing the rest of the club into the background. annoyance too easily takes over sometimes and now isn't any different as large palms press into the desk to push himself up in order to stand. "my father put me in charge, so i don't give a fuck what he said before—if he even said it." then again, he wouldn't put it past the old bastard. pulling his gaze from her, he glances in the direction of the couch against the far wall before taking in the beautiful woman before him again. "either we go back out there and you point out the fucker to me, or you can take a seat and give it a little time until he leaves. it's up to you."

 the last thing she wanted was to make a scene. besides, it wasn't like it hadn't happen before. she had lost count of how many times she had been expected to just smile and bear it, to brush off an unwanted touch as nothing more than a hazard of the job in a place like this. "i don't want to go back out there," she finds herself whispering, slender arms wrapping tightly around herself. " i don't want to see him, i just .. i need a second." slender legs take a tentative step toward the couch, her knees feeling dangerously weak beneath her. she's thankful, for the way he reacts and seems to genuinely care but she's entirely too exhausted to witness the fallout if he goes out there with blood on his mind. "just let him think he got away with it for tonight." she finally lets her frame sink onto the leather cushions of the sofa, a sigh escaping her. "i'm sorry if i interrupted something, you do look pretty busy."

"i'm not looking for my dad in the shower. i just ... happened to walk this way. it's not like i knew you'd be here." more lies that she's sure he can see right through, yet it only has shoulders lifting into a slight shrug. the entire time, her warm gaze doesn't linger from him, watching the way still damp curls fall perfectly into place and she hates how good he looks right now. it's like he's irresistible and that's her biggest problem with preston. that and the way he reads her well and his certainty with steps that carry him closer until he's finally in her personal space. the problem is that as much as she shouldn't want it, it's all she wants. "i knew you were hoping i'd stumble in here and see a little too much." a smile curls at the corner of her lips, nose scrunching at her own teasing tone. the look on her face drops in the slightest before a soft breath slips out. "you could walk by me, get dressed and leave," she begins, brows quirking with a tilt of her head to let her own curls fall over her shoulder. "then again, there's no getting in trouble if no one finds out."

he'd be lying if he said she left him indifferent. but then again serina didn't leave anyone in the team indifferent. she was beautiful, funny, and entirely off limits to every single guy on the team. including him. being captain sadly didn't grant him privileges when it came to the coach's daughter, if anything, it placed a massive target right on his back. if her dad ever caught wind of the way his dark gaze lingered on her during practices, or how his pulse skipped whenever she smiled like that, he'd be stripped of his captaincy before he could even open his mouth to explain. his hues darken even further, dropping down tot he tempting curve of her plush petals before snapping back up to lock onto her warm gaze. "i could do that, yeah." agrees with a soft nod, his large palm reaching out, long digits slowly tucking a strand of hair behind her ear. "but then i wouldn't give you what you came here for, and that'd be a shame, wouldn't it?" he leans in just a fraction of an inch closer, digits moving to trail down her cheekbone before his thumb brushes over her lower petal. "probably would make you so frustrated that tonight you would have no choice but to touch yourself to the thought of me."

as  much  as  it  pained  him  to  watch  the  tear  slid  down  her  cheek,  it  also  felt  like  confirmation.  she  wasn’t  over  him.  they  weren’t  done  just  yet.  his  own  pair  of  eyes  blink  while  she  takes  a  cautious  step  back,  noting  the  distance  she  was  trying  to  put  between  them.  he  counters  it,  moving  forward,  lifting  his  hand  wipe  away  the  dark  trail  left  behind  by  her  mascara.  “  our  future,  ”  he  corrected,  but  she  didn't  give  him  the  chance  to  continue  before  she  was  off  again.  he  supposed  she  deserved  the  space  to  say  her  piece,  just  as  he  deserved  to  endure  it.  and  that’s  exactly  what  he  was  doing  —  enduring.  taking  it  moment  by  moment  with  the  knowledge  that  she  could  very  well  walk  away  without  letting  him  at  least  defend  the  parts  of  him  that  still  fucking  cared.  but  he  has  a  hard  time  focusing  when  she  mentions  her  …  fiance.  even  thinking  the  word  caused  him  to  recoil,  giving  her  his  back  as  one  hand  found  his  hip  and  the  other  his  hair.  “  and  you  don’t  see  any  of  that  as  a  little  convenient  ?  ”  he  whips  back  around  to  look  at  her,  gesturing  like  a  maniac.  “  the  guy  has  been  a  part  of  your  rink  for  how  long  ?  ”  brows  lift,  but  he’s  not  searching  for  an  answer  because  he  already  has  it,  “  years,  kyria.  he’s  been  here  for  years.  you  didn’t  even  notice  him,  did  you  ?  ”  of  course  not.  why  would  she  ?  she  had  him.  they  had  each  other.  until  they  didn’t.  “  i  leave  and  suddenly  he’s  lingering  around  after  practice.  offering  you  a  ride  home.  waiting  to  be  invited  in.  ”  the  words  are  gritted  out,  as  he  hates  the  image  they  paint  in  his  mind.  “  it’s  not  your  fault.  ”  he  adds,  like  a  reminder  to  himself.  “  you  see  the  good  in  people.  you  always  have.  ”  

maybe he was right. of course, he was. that was exactly how it had started, but did it even matter? the other had been there for her, had attempted (and failed) to fix te broken shards paris had left in his wake. "and so what if it was convinient?" the brunette fires back, her voice cracking as slender arms cross tightly over her chest, a defensive shield against the harsh truth in his words. "what was he supposed to do? leave me there to drown because of some guy that didn't even bother to say goodbye?" but he wasn't just some guy. never had been. not that she'd admit it now. but paris was her first and only love. the only one that truly knew the real her. the only one who could make her feel completely safe with a single touch, and the only one capable of completely tearing her apart. "he didn't force his way into my life." she points out, brows furrowing. "i let him in, i did that. and i don't — i don't regret it." it had been months since she'd felt even remotely happy, months since had laughed without feeling the suffocating guilt of his absence pressing down on her chest. even if it was a pale imitation of the fire she had shared with the male standing before her, she finally had something good. "he makes me happy, paris. happy, do you know how long it's been since i could actually say that and mean it?"

she’d  been  called  that  term  before  —  menace.  but  the  voice  was  sharper,  with  more  bite,  and  rang  out  behind  her  as  she  ran  as  fast  as  her  legs  would  carry  her,  away  from  the  whitewashed  chapel.  jane  had  never  meant  to  make  trouble.  if  anything,  she  was  just  as  much  a  victim  of  her  own  deviance  as  those  who  suffered  from  it.  “  our  little  secret  …  ”  she  breathed,  nodding  her  head  slowly  to  show  just  how  obediant  she  could  be.  it  was  a  practice  she’d  nearly  perfected  over  years  and  years  of  falling  to  her  knees  at  the  mercy  of  some  higher  power  she  wasn’t  so  sure  she  even  believed  in  anymore.  she  needed  to  ground  herself  in  something  real,  something  she  could  touch.  something  like  the  hard  proof  of  his  desire  bulging  against  her  center.  but  jane’s  only  knowledge  of  what  she  was  about  to  do  was  through  books  she  read,  and  the  occasional  porn  she  tried  desperately  to  get  through  without  blushing.  “  close  your  eyes,  ”  she  leans  in,  finally  pressing  the  first  kiss  to  his  lips.  not  wanting  to  seem  too  eager,  she  only  let  it  linger  for  a  moment  while  waiting  for  him  to  do  as  she  instructed.  and  when  she  felt  like  it  was  safe,  that  she  was  free  from  any  judgement,  she  sank  her  dainty  hand  down  the  front  of  his  pants  and  wrapped  it  around  his  erection,  feeling  the  smooth,  hot  skin  beneath  her  touch.  a  quiet  exhale  escaped  her,  slightly  surprised  at  what  she  felt.  

she didn't care what anybody else thought about them. as long as she and aiden were happy, she didn't think anything - or anybody - else mattered. "anything." she repeats with ease, since she hadn't been more certain of anything in her life. she hadn't known she was capable of feeling as strongly as she did for aiden. she hadn't known that this type of love, this type of fire and hunger was even possible before him. now, she felt so comfortable within his embrace, she didn't think twice about expressing it. some might've pegged her as a fool, but she didn't care about that either. in that case, being a fool had got her in exactly this position and she couldn't have been happier about that. "hm, but i don't regret it," the giggle that follows suit is a sweet as sugar, nose nudging against his own, then his cheek, then his jaw, before she presses a gentle, lingering kiss against his skin there. "that sounds like exactly what i want..." the confession falls purred against his ear, allowing her hips to roll down against his own purposefully, teeth tucked against her bottom lip; restraining a moan and a smirk.

it's a low groan that rumbles deep in his chest at the intoxicating roll of her hips, the sound caught somewhere between a breathless laugh and pure, unadulterated desire. long digits tighten instantly against her waist, digging into her soft skin, refusing to let her move another inch away until he's entirely in control of the friction between them. "you're such a little menace, princess." the male breathes out against her skin as his lips trail down the column of her neck. he can feel the frantic little flutter of her pulse beneath his mouth, and it only fuels the fire she just lit in his veins. "telling me exactly what i want to hear, moving like that … you're trying to see how fast you can make me lose my mind." he shifts his weight, pressing her back into the mattress until the soft sheets catch them, his taller frame settling over hers so perfectly it feels entirely destined. with little effort, he pins her wrists above her head with one hand while his free palm slides up her thigh, the heat of his palm searing through her skin. "if that's what you wnat, you know i'm always more than happy to oblige." / @lustfooled ♡

"okay - so, if i broke up with her again, it wouldn't be completely off limits?" his relationship with her best friend was laughable at this point. more often than not, she'd broken up with him over the most intricate parts of his personality or the fact that he'd cheated on her in his sleep, or because she didn't like how he did his hair. he hadn't put a stop to it because he hadn't seen the harm in it, but they weren't going anywhere fast and if otto could see to it, they wouldn't be going anywhere at all anymore. his budding attraction for her best friend really putting a spanner in the works. his head tilts as he watches her still, gaze flickering purposefully across her features. fuck, she was gorgeous. she was also a little bit terrifying and completely off limits, what was a man to do? "i don't love her, ky. she doesn't love me. you know that as well as i do. she thinks i'm pathetic, doesn't she?"

 "— no, that's not what i meant!" an exhasperated sigh escapes her, the sound catching in her throat as she realizes how easily he just twisted her words against her. a furious blush creeps up her neck, her honeyed hues narrowing into a dangerous glare. "you're completely missing the point." she points out, er hands clenching into fists at her sides to stop herself from reaching out and physically shaking some sense into him. "if you two broke up for good tomorrow, it wouldn't magically make this okay. there are lines you don't cross, and sleeping wiht your ex's best friend is at the very top of that list." and yet, it's not enough to stop her from wanting it. from secretely wishing that the two of them would break up, for good. that he would finally belong to her without the suffocating weight of guilt holding them back. "she doesn't think you're pathetic," she murmurs, the righteous anger completely draining from her tone. "i just .. i don't get why you're together if you don't love each other, like what's the point?" / @lustfooled ♡

leyla's cheeks burn under his question and a blush overtakes every inch of visible skin. all she can do initially is nod, as it was a titbit of information she didn't share with everyone. "don't be mean," still she laughed softly, nose scrunching as she shrugs her shoulders. "my brother stuck around most of the time, because i asked him to." call her a prude, but if she didn't feel a strong urge to give into temptation, she wasn't going to do it. "...is that bad?"

"bad?" the male lets out an amused chuckle, shaking his head. "no, i don't think it's bad." he takes a slow step, his darker hues dropping to watch the soft blush painting her cheeks before locking right back onto her pretty eyes. " it's just .. a massive plot twist, considering how much game you try to talk." he leans his hip against the edge of the table, crossing his arms over his chest as a lazy, intrigued smirk pulls at the corner of his lips. "so are you waiting for marriage, or just for the one?"/ @lustfooled ♡

a brow cocks in bewilderment as she speaks. if he didn't know any better, he'd suspect that she wanted to get him into trouble with her father. "i don't have to tell him? come on now, miss wilson. you know that i do have to tell him. otherwise he'll find out another way and he won't be able to trust me anymore. or is that what you're aiming for?" julius questions with a tilt of his head, taking a confident step forward. "what were you thinking?"

 miss wilson. she hates it. hates how formal it sounds from him, nothing but a reminder of the boundary line drawn neatly between them. it's a title that puts miles of distance into a space where she desperately wants none, instantly making her feel like a reckless child being scolded by the one person she wishes would see her differently. "what ? — i'm not aiming for anything. i just thought .. out of everyone, you might actually have my back for once." warm hues glance away for a split second, a humorless chuckle escaping her. "you know what? nevermind." / @lustfooled ♡

"yes, i'm ... sorry." and she knows it means nothing. it's easy enough to see it in the way serena inches a step away when she never has before. no, the two of them always stepped closer toward each other because they were the one that each other needed. in times like this, she would help fix things and makes it so her best friend remained steady. right now, all she can do is watch through blurred vision while it feels like a piece of herself pulls away. "what do you want me to say? i fucked up." that's an understatement. really, it's so far from the truth that she can't even believe the words that escape her. because she hadn't fucked up, hadn't made a mistake. even if it was stupid and she knew it every single time, that never changed the fact that she wanted it. "it wasn't ... long. it's done and it'll never —i'll never even look at him again, okay? i fucked up and i'm sorry."

there are so many things she wants to say, so many things she feels right now. but no words seem big enough to hold the magniture of the betrayal crushing her chest. a bitter, broken laugh cuts through her tears. "it wasn't long?" she repeats, her voice trembling so violently that the words pratically splinter int he air. "you say that like it makes a difference. like there's an acceptable amount of time to destroy my family. — you still chose to do it. every single time you looked at him, every text you sent, yuo looked at my life and decided it was worth scarificing." the buzzing numbness in her fingers intensifies, a terrifyingly loud static filling her head as her brain begs for order. begging her to count, to blink, to do something to fix the catastrophic shift in her universe. but the rules have broken, the safe heaven is gone. "don't look at him again? it doesn't matter if you never look at him for the rest of your life," the blonde chockes out. "i don't want to see you ever again, you're dead to me."

when she speaks her best friend's name, a name he's heard so many times, a name that's usually filled with joy whenever serena speaks it, his stomach drops because he thinks something happened to her. then a heavy silence sits between them as she goes on and his blue gaze widens in the slightest. "—what?" his voice is low, almost whispering the single word. part of him can't believe it, causing his head to shake, but seeing the way she shakes makes his stomach drop that much more at the thought. "are you sure? how — when ..." anything he might say doesn't feel right on the tip of his tongue. inhaling deeply, his hand reaches back out to wrap around her elbow, pulling her along the rest of the way from the foyer toward the living room to inch her along until she sits on the couch. "tell me what happened. how the hell did you find that out?"

it all feels surreal. like a fucking nightmare she can't wake up from, no matter how hard she tries. once again, she allows him to guide her along. the plush cushions from the couch sink beneath her, but she still feels completely lost, like she's free falling through the floorboards of his apartment. "i went through his phone," she chockes out, honeeyd hues locking onto a random spot ont he carpet. just admitting out loud brings back that overwhelming wave of panic, her fingers immediately starting to twitch as her mind desperately begs for a compulsion, but there is no comfort to be found in her head right now. "he's been acting weird, has spent his time at work, and whenever he is home, he and my mom just keep fighting." a shaky breath shudders past her petals, and she knows she's old enough to live on her own, to not let her parents' marriage dictate her own stability, but her mind didn't work like that. it never had. "i found text messages, pictures, just .. months of it."

steps out of the way as the other femme exits the room and walks into the adjacent kitchen . grabs herself a beer from the refrigerator and comes back out , plopping down on the couch . twists the cap off to take a sip , "i was around the block , figured i'd stop in and bother you ." there's a pause before she looks up at him like he wasn't telling her something , "i haven't heard from you today . got worried a bear came out of the woodworks and ate you up ."

he loves how comfortable she is around him, how she claims his space and his couch as if it were her own. long legs follow her back into the living room, a soft smile replacing the lingering tension on his face as he leans his shoulder against the doorframe, crossing his arms over his chest. "so, in other words, you missed me." the male teases, an amused glint dancing in his warm hues as he tracks the casual way she takes a sip of her beer. "i appreciate the concern, but i think i can handle a few woodland creatures, it takes a lot more than that to get rid of me." he walks over and plops down on the opposite end of the couch, kicking his legs up onto the coffee table. "what were you doing around the block, anyway?"