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The mutual acknowledgment that they both had to grow up faster than other peers.

For drastically different reasons and in drastically different ways and in drastically different environments, both allowed to be children in limited ways: Kevin being completely alone, having to learn how to survive and manage himself and his powers, learning to be self sufficient while Gwen always being the responsible one, the one to set the example and consistently performing as the "mature one for her age" because that's what's the expectation is-

Both understanding that love is conditional, that they have to deserve it in some capacity. Kevin knows he cannot be loved unless he chooses to hide what he is on his sleeve like he loves to do; Gwen knows she cannot be loved unless she bends over backwards to have something to offer as proof that she's worthy of it.

Picture Kevin joining the team, Gwen who has known this guy only by the harm he caused to her cousin be absolutely not on board with taking such a risk, especially with Max gone, and making it very clear that if something happens to Ben she will actually kill him. They loathe each other, compete with each other, just do not like each other and yet there's this frustrating jealousy that Kevin feels in seeing Ben being so protected and so loved by Gwen despite being a little shit and a part of him yearns for that unconditional care, just as there's this frustrating jealousy Gwen feels in seeing Kevin somehow being given a chance in spite of what he did when she knows that wouldn't be allowed if they switched places.

Then as they grow closer and closer, both casually via fighting besides each other and bonding over mutual interests and by learning more about one another, they start to actually see each other: Kevin sees how Gwen doesn't care for people who don't pay her mind and in spite of all their microaggressions because she's virtuous or mature or secure but because she's unable and unwilling to recognize the issue and she needs things to stay that way or everything falls apart; Gwen sees how Kevin isn't distrusting and at times unapproachable because he's a criminal who needs correction, nor he indulges in crime because at heart he cannot change, but because he literally had never been able to afford a different way of life and he's desperately looking for stability in his life.