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ęŠ pairing: timeskip!kenma kozume x virgin!female reader
ęŠ warnings: explicit content, language
ęŠ word count: 4.3k
ęŠ synopsis: you relationship with kenma has always been understatedâquiet moments, mutual understanding, and an unspoken connection. but when you open up about your insecurities regarding intimacy, things take a turn. one kiss, a subtle shift in dynamics, and suddenly everything you once knew feels entirely different. caught in a whirlwind of desire and growing affection, you find yourself grappling with feelings that you've ignored for years. is it too late to turn back or is this the beginning of something far deeper?
You vividly remember the day you moved to Japan. You were eleven, your nervousness amplified by the way the airport had smelledâmetallic, unfamiliar, cold. Your mother stayed back in your hometown with your younger brother, and you followed your father across the ocean for his new job⌠your new life. You told yourself it was an adventure, trembling in anticipation.
It wasnât. Not at first.
Making friends when you didnât speak the language fluently and stood out in every classroom turned out to be less like an odyssey and more of a series of long, silent lunch breaks. Teachers tried, some classmates smiled, but nothing stuck. Not until high school.
Transferring to Nekoma High at fifteen was your fatherâs idea. Heâd said something about the schoolâs progressive curriculum and cultural diversity. You hadnât hoped for much until, one week into classes, the principal cornered you near the shoe lockers and asked if youâd consider being the manager for the boysâ volleyball team.
âItâs part of a new initiative. Weâre looking to build an inclusive sports environment,â he said. âAnd you have excellent organisational skills from your transcript.â You said yes, mostly out of curiosity. And maybe because it was the first time someone had sought you out, instead of the other way around.
The first practice was awkward, to put it lightly. A room full of sweaty teenage guys and sharp whistles. You stood off to the side, notebook in hand, questioning every life choice that led you there with a resigned sigh. Until Kuroo TetsurĹ slung an arm around your shoulders and said, âDonât worry, youâre one of us now. Youâll get used to these knuckleheads.â
The team protested. You laughed for the first time in weeks. Thatâs how it all began.
They took you under their wing like a little sister, especially Kurooâhe treated you with a big-brother protectiveness that made the transition less lonely. Lev would tell you outrageous lies just to see you smile. Yamamoto always tried too hard to impress you but meant well. Yaku taught you how to be blunt in Japanese without accidentally insulting someoneâs grandmother.
But the one you inexplicably gravitated toward was Kenma.
You were the same age, and the same reserved type, at least at first glance. Though unlike him, you didnât mind talking. People were drawn to you in a way that surprised you. So, Kenma didnât intimidate you. If anything, you felt safe around him. He was calm, observant, and never asked for more than you were willing to give.
Youâd sit beside him during breaks, leaning over his shoulder as he played on his handheld console.
âYouâre always watching,â heâd say without looking up.
âI like watching,â youâd plainly reply.
And when he let you try it out yourselfâtentatively handing over his console like it was something fragileâyou knew you had earned his trust. Youâd talk about things beyond video games. Books. Movies. Your homesickness. His dislike of crowds. The weird comfort of silence. He was the only one who didnât flinch when you talked about the divorce or missing your mom and brother.
By the end of your second year, you were inseparable. Everyone saw itâhell, even Kuroo made a habit of teasing you about it.
âSheâs the Kenma whisperer,â heâd joke. âHe actually talks around her.â
You dismissed it. You told yourself it was just friendship, that the small twists in your stomach when his shoulder brushed yours were normal. That the deliberate and soft way he looked at you was just how he looked at everyone.
But somewhere near the end of school, when the weight of the future started crawling into every conversation, you realised you felt something more. And it scared the hell out of you. You didnât say anything. How could you risk losing what you had when it had taken you so long to find it?
After graduation, the team drifted as people often do. University took everyone in different directions, but you all stayed in touch. Kurooâs group chats were relentless and reunions became an annual thing, something precious to look forward to.
With Kenma, your bond never faded. If anything, it grew.
Even when you were in different cities, the two of you never changedâlate night phone calls, half-asleep messages, and meeting up whenever you could. Both of you still talked like no time had passed. Still knew each other in that rare, bone-deep way. However, you dated around, courtesy of your college roommate urging you to move on and get laid. You had simply nodded, telling yourself the crush was a remnant of adolescence. It had to be. It wasnât healthy to keep holding on.
Tragically, it never went anywhere with the people you went out with. No one matched the way Kenma understood you without trying. No one matched the genuinity and the slow-burn thrill.
And now, in your twenties, with a stable job and a quiet apartment, you were beginning to admit that maybe it had never been just a crush.
But if that was true⌠what in the world were you supposed to do about it?
Kenmaâs penthouse was everything youâd expect: clean lines, muted colors, and minimalist furniture. Expensive in a subtle way.Â
He was already curled up on the low couch when you stepped in, barefoot and hoodie-clad, legs tucked under himself like a cat. âYouâre late,â he murmured without looking up from his nintendo.
âYouâre lucky I even showed up,â you replied, dropping your bag by the door.
âOh?â His eyes flicked up momentarily, amused. âIs this you playing hard to get?â
You rolled your eyes and sank into the seat beside him, close enough for your knees to brush. âIf I was playing hard to get, you wouldnât stand a chance.â
That earned a low hum of laughter. âSo self-assured.â
The night unfolded the way it generally didâcasual banter, leftover takeout, and dumb inside jokes that had survived since Nekoma. You both sat there, bodies angled toward each other, the city lights painting the walls with a faint gold.
At one point, he turned off the TV, but neither of you moved. There was a falter. A lapse stretching between words. Then, after much thought, you said it.
âCan I ask you something kind of... weird?â
Kenma blinked. âSure.â
You took a breath. âDo you ever think youâre, like, bad in bed?â
His eyebrows rose. That certainly wasnât what heâd imagined the conversation would jump to. You winced at yourself. âOkay, wow, that sounded way more self-deprecating than I meant it to.â
âLittle bit.â
âIâm serious,â you said, shifting to face him fully. âIâve dated, right? But it never really went anywhere. And when it did get physical, it just⌠didnât go that far.â
Kenma didnât interrupt. Merely listened.
âI mean, Iâve done stuff,â you continue rambling, suddenly fascinated by the hem of your sleeve. âA little oral. Some handjobs. But, um, Iâve never⌠had sex.â
There it was. Out in the open. Youâd lobbed the confession between you like a live grenade, waiting for it to detonate. Only that it didnât. The lack of response wasnât exactly suffocating, though it did make you scream a little on the inside.Â
Kenmaâs voice was gentler than you expected when it came. âWhy are you thinking about this now?â
His words made you hesitate. âBecause Iâm trying to see people again. But every time I get close to someone, I panic. I keep doubting myselfâwhat if Iâm not good at it? What if they expect me to know what Iâm doing and I donât?â
A beat.
âAnd itâs not about being ashamed,â you added quickly. âI just want to feel... in control. Comfortable.â
Kenma studied you. âYou could just tell them.â
âI know. But I donât want it to be a thing. Like, âoh no, sheâs a virgin, handle her with care.ââ You wrinkled your nose. âI donât want pity sex. Or worse, performance sex.â You dared a peep at him. âHave youâŚ?â
He tilted his head. âHad sex?â
Your ears burned, unsure of whether you wanted to hear the answer. âYeah.â
Kenma leaned back against the couch, arms crossed. âI have.â
The words sat in the air like smoke. You ignored the tightening of your chest. âWas it good?â you asked. Perhaps, a little too quickly.
He gave you a look. âYou really want to know?â
You stammered. âYes. No. Kind of. For research purposes.â
He smirked. âOf course.â
âShut up.â
He was quiet for a moment before replying, âSome of it was good. Depends on the person, I guess.â
You hummed, eyes on his collarbone. âWould you ever, uh, be willing to show someone the ropes?â
A pause. âWhat do you mean?â
You didnât answer right away. The apartment felt charged, causing your fingers to twist in your lap. Without meeting his gaze, you exhaled shakily.
âI was just thinking⌠if I ever wanted to figure this outâhypotheticallyâyouâre the only person Iâd trust not to make it weird.â
Another pause. A longer one. âYouâre asking me to have sex with you.â
Your stomach flipped. âI didnât say that.â
âBut thatâs what you meant.âÂ
You groaned. âForget it. This was dumb. I shouldnât haveââ
âI didnât say no.â Kenma looked at you. Not joking, not teasingâjust looking. That same sincere care youâd known for years, now sharpened with something else.
Something almost hungry.
âDo you want me to?â he asked, voice low. âHelp you?â
Your heart thundered. âWell, IâOnly if⌠you want to.â
He leaned forward. âI want to. Letâs start with a kiss.â
You froze, eyes widening at the abruptness of it all.
âSince, you know,â he added casually, âweâre doing research.â You laughedânervous, breathyâand nodded. âRight. For the glory of science.â
He moved in leisurely, giving you every chance to pull back. You didnât. His lips brushed yours once. Gentle and testing, your breath hitching at the sensation. You kissed him again. More assertive than previously. As a result, his hand found your cheek. The angle changed, the excitement deepened.
You realised begrudgingly that your idea had stopped being hypothetical real fast.
Kenma and you grew feverish, your actions slow, then speedy, like you couldnât get enough. You gripped his hoodie in an act of desperation. His fingers trailed along your waist, reluctant yet calculating. You felt his touch at the hem of your t-shirt and gasped, pulling back.
âIâI need to stop,â you whispered.
Kenma, breathing heavily, nodded. âOkay.â
You sat there, chests heaving, foreheads nearly touching.
âThat wasâŚâ you began.
âMhm,â he said, voice hoarse. âIt was.â
You didnât sleep together that night. Be that as it may, something had undoubtedly shifted. Something you couldnât take back. Neither of you were prepared for what that first sensuous encounter had unlocked.Â
After the kiss, everything was different. Not in a dramatic, movie-like way, mind you. There were no whispered confessions or next-day declarations. You didnât even text about it. Not directly, though every message after did have a different weight to it.
gamer boi: you left your ring on the bathroom sink
You: OMGTHANKYOU iâve been searching for it all day :(
gamer boi: how did you even forget it?? isnât it your favourite???? Â
You: itâs not my fault someone kept me distracted with his mouth đ
gamer boi: donât act like you didnât enjoy it
The next time you saw Kenma, you were wearing a sundress with zero intentions of escalating anything. Apparently, it didnât matter.
You were barely inside before Kenma tugged you in by the wrist, your back hitting the front door with a loud thud. His mouth was on yours again, hands roaming like heâd been starved of touch. His fingers curled around your waist, dragging you flush against him. You let out an embarrassingly needy whimper, arms looped around his neck for balance.
It was supposed to be another kiss. Nothing too intense, nothing too fiery. But soon his tongue brushed against yoursâmischievously coaxing. When his knee slid between your thighs, you knew that you were done for.
Your nails dug into his shoulders and he groaned into your mouth.
âOkay?â he checked in, lips grazing your jaw.
You nodded, breathless. âYeah. Justâyou⌠itâs all very new. â
He paused. âTell me if you want to stop.â
âI will.â
That night, you didnât go all the way either.
But you let him touch you. Really touch you.
You ended up in his lap on the couch, your dress hiked up, his t-shirt discarded somewhere on the floor. His motions were maddeningly drawn outâsmoothing over your thighs, teasing under your panties, fingers slicking gently over you until you were shaking. One thing youâd grown to learn thanks to these electrifying escapades was that Kenma neither rushed nor demanded.
Just observed.
He watched you unravel, watched you fall apart with nothing more than his hand between your legs and his mouth pressed to your throat.
Youâd returned the favour a week laterâkneeling between his knees in that same living room, palms steady even though your mind was a mess. He had gripped your hair, but not harshlyâmore like he didnât know what else to hold onto.
And after, when you wiped your mouth and leaned your cheek against his thigh, both of you panting hard, he murmured, âYouâre dangerous when youâre confident.â
You smiled. âGuess the research is working, huh?â
His only answer was a smirk.
Life, as it usually does, got in the way. You were swamped at work and Kenma had his own obligations. Days passed. Weeks, even. You didnât meet up with him, but you felt him everywhere. In your skin. In your thoughts. In the aching, restless emptiness of your bed. And worse: you missed him. Not just the way he touched youâbut the him of it. His deadpan humour. The way heâd pause in conversation like he was thinking four moves ahead. The attractive rasp of his voice. The way he drank you in.
You missed your friend. You craved your⌠something.
You didnât know what you were to him anymore. In spite of that, you knew that you needed him.
Kurooâs reunion couldnât have come at a betterâor worseâtime.
Youâd dressed without overthinking it. Okay, maybe a little overthinking. The black corset hugged your curves like sin. The skirt hit mid-thigh, leaving appropriately enough to the imagination. The oversized leather blazer added a touch of effortlessness you didnât actually feel. And the platform boots? Tall enough to be seductive.
When you walked into the high-end restaurant, every eye turned. On the contrary, you only looked for one.
Kenma was at the bar, drink in hand, dressed in a black button-up with the sleeves rolled to his forearms. His hair was tousled, face unreadable. But when he saw you, he froze. Eyes trailing down greedily, taking his sweet time. He didnât smile or wave.
Later, after hours of group toasts, dodging Kurooâs banter, and pretending you didnât itch with anticipation, Kenma found you on the rooftop balcony.
The city buzzed beneath.
âYouâve been avoiding me,â you said, not turning around.Â
He stepped closer, âYouâve been busy.â
âSo have you.â
All you hear for a few seconds is the cacophony of traffic and pedestrians.
âYou look good tonight.â
You swallowed, your feet carrying you to him. âYeah?â
Kenma appeared to be just as tormented as you. âToo good.â
âThat a problem?â
He didnât bother with an answer. Reaching for you, he hastily tugged you close. His mouth slanted over yours, hot and aching, weeks (heâd argue, proclaiming âyearsâ) of self-control slipping like sand through fingers.
You didnât even remember getting into the cab.
The moment Kenmaâs apartment door shut behind you, it was chaos.
Lips crashing. Hands fumbling. Breath caught between kisses that were all teeth and tongue, no space for thought. Kenma backed you against the wall while you yanked at the buttons of his shirt like you were unwinding every second youâd spent pretending this wasnât what you wanted. He dragged your blazer off, then your corset. His hands slid up your thighs, underneath your skirt, finding nothing but heat and skin.
âYou planned this?â he muttered, strained, against your neck.
âI thought about you,â you whispered honestly.
He cursed, kissing you deeperâravenous, like the time apart had built a pressure in him he could no longer contain. Soon, you were in his bed. Limbs knotting, bare. His weight on top of you was crushingâso real with almost a decadeâs worth of tension, of friendship, of everything unspoken.
His touch skimmed up your stomach, pausing at the curve of your breast.
âI need you,â he said, hoarsely. âTell me I can have you. Please.â
âIâm yours,â you reassuredâjust a whisper, but your whole body yearned to meet his. âI want you so bad, Kenma.â
He reached down between your thighs, fingers running through the mess there, working you open. You moaned, legs falling wider to allow him to move inside you better. You were drowning in sensation. His teeth nipped at your chest, hips grinding just barely against yours, and yetâ
You wanted this. God, you wanted him. Butâ
âWait,â you muttered, voice thin and trembling.
Kenma froze immediately. His eyes locked on yours, reading your face with terrifying precision. âWhatâs wrong? Did I hurt you?â
âNo,â you said quickly. âNo, Iââ
Your hand pressed lightly to his chest. âI canâtâI canât do this like itâs solely physical. Not with you.â
The room shifted.
âI thought I could,â your voice was so low, one might believe you werenât speaking at all. âI told myself this was just for fun. A learning thing. âResearch.â But I canât pretend anymore.â
You looked up at him, shame creeping in. âIf I sleep with you, Iâll fall completely. I already have. It wonât just be sex to me. I donât think it ever was.â You gulped, words turning rawer. âAnd if thatâs not what you want⌠then this was a mistake.â
Tranquility. Thick. Cracking at the seams.
You felt your panic rise. âSorry. I know I fucked things up, god. I should leaveâ"
âStop,â Kenma finally spoke. Your blathering halted.
His fingers trailed up your cheek. âYou think Iâd let you in like thisâhave you like thisâif it was just physical to me?â You didnât answer. Couldnât, really.
âIâve been in love with you since high school, you idiot,â he said, and your stomach dropped. âI just never thought youâd want me back.â
You blinked up at him, stunned.
âWhen we kissed that day,â he continued, reverent, âeverything changed. I didnât want to risk scaring you away, so I thought if I gave you what you needed⌠eventually youâd see it too.â
He kissed your forehead. âSee that Iâd burn down the world for you.â
You gazed up at him, shaking slightly. âYouâre not serious.â
He kissed your cheek. Your temple. Your nose. âIâm dead serious.â
Emotion swelled in your heart, hand cupping the side of his face. âKenmaâŚâ
He leaned into the touch. âTalk to me.â
âI used to wait for practice to end just to walk home with you. I used to sit in the stands and pretend I was watching the match, but I was only watching you.â
The corner of his lips twitched. His hands ran down your sides.
âI thought I was broken for never wanting anyone the way my friends did,â you whispered. âBut then you showed me it wasnât about anyone. It was about you. It was always you.â
The atmosphere in the room grew charged with something sacred.
âI love you,â you declared, like the words were stolen from your ribs. Like they were always there between the two of you, waiting for someone to speak them to life.
Kenma was silent for one momentâjust oneâbefore⌠âI love you too,â he kissed you like a man reborn. This time, there was no rush.
He moved over you like he was making a vowâhands smoothing over every curve of your body, lips mapping every inch of your skin, like he was trying to memorise the sound of your breath as it caught in your throat.Â
When he lined himself up and pushed inside, it was slow. Intimate. He didnât look away once. You clung to him, gaping at the fullness, the sheer gravity of him inside you.
âAlright?â he murmured, brows furrowing in concern.
You nodded, breath shaky. âBetter than alright.â
He kissed you again, explosively possessive. After what felt like ages, he moved.
Each thrust was deliberate and claiming. His hand tangled with yours above your head. His other gripped your hip, holding you steady as he rocked into you, building a rhythm that made your back arch.
âIâve dreamed about this,â he murmured into your ear. âDreamed about you under me, begging for more.â
You moaned, eyelashes fluttering. âYou have me now.â
âTrust me, Iâm never letting go.â
Your bodies danced in a symphony that blurred the line between pleasure and worship. You came first, legs trembling. He followed right after, whining your name against your lips, pulsing with everything he felt and couldnât say fast enough.
While you both lay thereâspent and dizzyâyou clung to each other. Because you knew this wasnât the end.
You woke up to sunlight. Golden, slithering between silk curtains and spilling across the sheets in hazy lines.
Next to you was Kenma, his arm draped over your waist. The slight scrunch of his forehead indicated he was still deep in thought even while asleep. The sheets were rumpled around your legs, your body still sticky with sweat and afterglow, and every inch of you ached deliciously.
Oh my god, you thought with a giddy smile.
Your phone buzzed on the nightstand. You reached out, careful not to disturb Kenma, and blinked at the screen.
8 Messages from loser
1 Missed Call
1 Voice Note
You opened the texts, bracing yourself.
loser: where the hell are you?? kenmaâs vanished too tf         Â
loser: you better not have left. lev tried to arm wrestle yamamoto and lost. to YAMAMOTO Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â
loser: i swear if you ghosted the reunion iâm kicking your ass    Â
loser: wait                                                  Â
loser: waitttttttt                                            Â
loser: OH MY GOD DID YOU AND KENMA LEAVE TOGETHER???!!!Â
loser: TELL ME THIS ISNâT HOW IâM FINDING OUTÂ Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â Â
loser: ANSWER ME FUCKER
You choked on your laugh, snorting into your palm. Kenma stirred beside you, yawning.
âMmm⌠what time is it?â he mumbled, exhaustion evident in his voice.
âToo early for our best friend to be having a meltdown,â you giggled.
Kenma cracked one eye open. âKuroo?â
You held your phone up. âHeâs in panic mode.â
Kenma blinked. Then closed his eyes again and guided you down into his chest. âIgnore him.â
You laughed, cuddling into his warmth. His hair was mussed, bleached strands falling into his eyes. His fingers rubbed lazy circles into your back, like he couldnât stop touching you in his tired state either.
âI still canât believe last night happened,â you remarked dreamily.
Kenma nuzzled your shoulder. âI can. Iâve imagined it a thousand times.â
You flushed. âOkay, damn.â
He smirked against your skin. âYou think I didnât spend high school losing my mind over you?â
You were about to answer when his hand slid lower. Then lower still.
âKenmaââÂ
He rolled on top of you before you could finish. You sucked in a breath as his mouth found yoursâinviting at first, then insatiable. Your legs parted instinctively as he settled between them, hardening length grinding slowly into your wetness. His body was still warm from sleep, but his touch was awake. Very awake.
âYouâre gonna start something you canât finish,â you warned.
He kissed your jaw. âWanna bet?â
You fisted his hair, pulling him back to meet your eyes. âWeâre seriously doing this again? First thing in the morning?â
âYouâre naked in my bed,â he deadpanned. âIf anything, this is on you.â
You were mid-laugh, mid-moan, mid-thigh squeeze whenâŚÂ
âI SWEAR TO GOD IF YOUââ
The bedroom door slammed open. You both stopped, unmoving.Â
Kenmaâs mouth was on your neck. His hand was on your thigh. Your legs were definitely wrapped around his waist. Kuroo stood in the doorway like a horror movie freeze frame.
One hand still on the doorknob. Jaw hanging open. Eyebrow twitching.
You screeched and dove under the sheets like they could erase the last thirty seconds of reality. Kenma⌠just sighed. Still completely on top of you, showing no signs of clothing himself.
âGet out,â he said flatly.
Kuroo was pale. In a shocking display, he turned red. If possible, redder.
âBy the way, I didnât give you the code to my penthouse so you could come and go as you please,â Kenma muttered, frustrated.
âI thought you were dead!â
âKurooââ you poked your head out, expression absolutely boilingââIâm begging you to forget this ever happened.â
âOh no. This is burned into my soul. Wait till the group chat hears about this.â
Kenma finally stood up, arranging the blanket properly to cover you like a true gentleman. Instead of being embarrassed, he looked rather annoyed at being interrupted. Like this was your regular Saturday afternoon in the Kozume household.
Kuroo glanced between the two of you, hands on hips, processing.
Then he scoffed, âI watched you two lunatics dawdle around each other for YEARS. Years. You think I didnât know?â
âThen, why are you surprised?â Kenma asked.
âBecause I thought youâd tell me through a well-structured text, not with your fucking nipples out!â
You screamed in humiliation and retreated into the covers again.
Kenma shrugged. âWe were busy.â
âOh, no need to tell me.â Kuroo turned, still muttering to himself, âI'm gonna need bleach. For my eyes. For my brain. For myâŚâ
The bedroom door slammed shut and it was peaceful for all of three seconds. At the same time, you and Kenma burst out laughing. He wrapped his arms around you, burying his face in your neck as you wheezed into the pillow, your body shaking.
âNever living that down,â you gasped.
âWorth it,â he whispered.
And then he kissed you againâslow and softâlike he had nowhere else to be.
the click-clack of the keyboard in the media lab was the only thing keeping you sane. around you, the new aoba johsai student journalism room was a chaotic mess of papers and half-empty soda cans. you didnât have time to glance around and stress about it, though.
you zipped up your camera bag, adjusting the strap as you leaned over your computer desk. on the screen was a half-finished draft for the sports section of the school paper. the working title ; âthe price of the pedestal : a captainâs weakness.â you stared it for a few seconds, wondering what it could mean if you published it anytime soon. you knew who it was really about, but that you kept to yourself.
âhey, you ready to head out?â
you looked up to see kindaichi standing in the doorway, scratching the back of his neck. his tall frame practically blocked the doorway, so students walking out excused themselves shyly. he was in his jersey, seemingly fresh out of practice. âyeah gimmie a sec.â you uttered before clicking a few more things and shutting the computer down.
âhow was practice?â the question comes natural to you as you join kindaichi on a walk down the hallway.
âbrutal,â he groaned. âoikawa was on a tear today. kept pushing the sets faster like heâs got something to lose this friday.â
at the mention of the name, you sighed and rolled your eyes. âif karasuno wins, iâll be the happiest girl in the world.â you smirk. it drops when you realize that kindaichi was literally on the team.
he gives you a look but you look away so you donât have to face the glare. ârelax, iâm kidding,â you mumbled through a lie.âmostly.â
kindaichi let out a chuckle. âyou really have it out for him, donât you? you know some third years have been talking about you only creating that club to talk crap about âem.â
âlet them think that.â you say, although it couldnât be that far from the truth.
you hated tooru oikawa. hate is definitely a strong word, but the right one. and not in a âoh iâm so different iâll hate oikawa so heâll notice meâ kind of way. it was more of a complicated situation. a couple of years ago,, you played the same sport for the same school you journal for and you were damn good at it too. as a freshman, you were a striker with a lethal spike that could tear through two person blocks. volleyball wasnât just a sport to you. it was everything. you dreamed, breathed, lived volleyball.
the girlâs team discontinued after your injury. most of them were weary of the incident and didnât want the same thing to happen to them. there were less strikers everyday and sooner or later, there was no girls volleyball team at aoba johsai.
the regional tournament was the last game you guys ever played. who knew a bad landing wouldâve cost you everything. it only took one stupid, miscalculated landing to shatter your knee and everything in it.
the doctors said youâd recover, but youâd probably never play competitively again. you watched as your spotlight was shadowed by the boysâ team, and your best friend just happened to be playing alongside the boy who tormented you for your injury. you decided to get into sport journalism; which was your only option just to stay close to the court.
âearth to y/n.â kindaichi said, breaking you out of your thoughts as you reached the heavy double doors leading to the courtyard. he waited for you to catch up before he held one of them open. his eyes always accidentally drifted to your knee, noting the subtle limp you walked with.
you blinked before you could catch his eye and sighed. âsorry, this deadline has me out of it.â you exhale, running a hand through your hair as you walk through the door.
âyeah, i can see that.â he nods, catching up next to you.
as if on cue to ruin your afternoon, blocking the main gates to the school was no one other than tooru oikawa and his adoring group of fan girls.
you grumble under your breath. âcan we go a different routeâŚâ but before kindaichi could answerâ
âkindaichi!â the smooth and agitating voice of the team captain erupted across the courtyard. as if he hadnât seen him at practice earlier today, he waved at him and smiled at his âfansâ before walking away from them and towards the both of you.
kindaichi glanced at your expression before straightening himself. âi was going to ask you to make a group chat with the team during practice but it slipped my mind.. you know, since iâm getting my phone fixed and all that.â oikawa gestured the thought away with his hand.
âyeah iâll do it soon as i get home.â kindaichi responds.
you said nothing. you hardly ever speak when heâs present.
oikawaâs gaze tilts towards. his smileâas cocky as everâ twitches as if daring you to say something. âmm. journalism clubâs still going, i see. wonder if itâll last longer than your volleyballââ
âshut your fucking mouth!â you snap, eyebrow twitching as you stepped forward.
kindaichi flinched and his eyes widened. his hand reached for your shoulder and he patted it. ây/n, chill out.â he whispered, urging you to just walk away.
âyeah?â oikawa raised his eyebrow and lifted his chin, clearly trying to display he had an advantage. âyour fuse has always been short hasnât it?â
you scoff through your teeth, staring into the dark brown eyes of your very worst enemy. ây/n, please.â kindaichi whispered under his breath. he was caught in the worst possible position: torn between loyalty to his best friend who had suffered an unfair incident, and to the captain who held his athletic future in his hands. "let's just go.â he urged.
you took half a step back, intentionally removing yourself from kindaichiâs grip. deciding to let him have this one, you walk away, kindaichi catching up after mumbling something to his captain. the silence following the walk down the street was deafening. you stared down at the floor, hands clenched by your side as you were about to seep back into your thoughts.
âlook, i get why youâre angry, but you canât just lose it like that in front of the whole courtyard.â
âthere was barely anyone there.â you say bitterly.
ây/n.â kindaichi sighs. âthatâs not my point and you know it. youâre just giving him what he wants, you know. he likes getting a rise outta you, i dunno why you canât see that.â
you kick a pebble a few feet in front of you with your good leg. theres nothing you can say to that, because you know that you always take the bait. you both stop at the corner where your paths usually split. âget some rest tonight, yuutaro,â you told him, offering him a small genuine smile. âsorry for causing you trouble.â
kindaichiâs eyebrows lifted inward and he huffed, leaning down to give you a quick hug. âdont worry âbout it. see ya tomorrow.â
đŻđťđ¸đś đđžđđžđž ⌠â this ideaâs lowkey been in the drafts for a while so im posting it before i get busy with collegeâŚ
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the way you write is so CUTEE and esp the way you wrote kageyama he's so cute AJDES can I request kageyama having a crush on his classmate because she's nice to him and is always patient in helping with his homework. Poor boy doesn't know how to handle it but he's got his feelings written all over his face esp after she joins to be a manager that the rest of the club could see and so they end up playing wingman for him in their own chaotic ways (they're doing their best) đĽšđĽš
Benchmarks
Ugh heâs adorable. I apologize for the delay I have been dealing with dumb ahh men to the point of exhaustion.
Kageyama who manages to be seatmates with the sweetest girl on planet earth. She always brings tissues, just in case. She takes notes and is the forest to offer them when heâs behind.
Kageyama who âforgotâ he had a test and had you explain the concept just so he can stare at your face without being creepy (which he does anyway).
Kageyama who, when you help him cheat during an English test, kept giving you things to âpay it backâ for two whole weeks and by the end you had to take him by the shoulders and plead with him to stop.
Kageyama who always âforgetsâ to bring a pencil and asks you one, without fail, every morning.
Kageyama who genuinely gets giddy when you laugh and has to hide his face in his hands.
Kageyama who gets beat red when Sugawara finds out heâs head over heels by snooping through his journal. He has a page a week written about you, with cute stickers and everything.
Kageyama who genuinely can not be in the same room with out asking you for help because he doesnât know how else to flirt with you.
Kageyama who will do everything in his willpower to get something done for you. If you even in passing say you need help moving something he will have it done in seconds.
Kageyama who walks you to classes to avoid the weird jocks, so he may as well hold you bag, and get you a snack.
Kageyama who just so happens to invite you to matches at the worst times, so the team begins to believe you to be a ghost. This goes on for months. One day you show up to practice to tutor Kageyama and the team loses their mind.
the way you write is so CUTEE and esp the way you wrote kageyama he's so cute AJDES can I request kageyama having a crush on his classmate because she's nice to him and is always patient in helping with his homework. Poor boy doesn't know how to handle it but he's got his feelings written all over his face esp after she joins to be a manager that the rest of the club could see and so they end up playing wingman for him in their own chaotic ways (they're doing their best) đĽšđĽš
Benchmarks
Ugh heâs adorable. I apologize for the delay I have been dealing with dumb ahh men to the point of exhaustion.
Kageyama who manages to be seatmates with the sweetest girl on planet earth. She always brings tissues, just in case. She takes notes and is the forest to offer them when heâs behind.
Kageyama who âforgotâ he had a test and had you explain the concept just so he can stare at your face without being creepy (which he does anyway).
Kageyama who, when you help him cheat during an English test, kept giving you things to âpay it backâ for two whole weeks and by the end you had to take him by the shoulders and plead with him to stop.
Kageyama who always âforgetsâ to bring a pencil and asks you one, without fail, every morning.
Kageyama who genuinely gets giddy when you laugh and has to hide his face in his hands.
Kageyama who gets beat red when Sugawara finds out heâs head over heels by snooping through his journal. He has a page a week written about you, with cute stickers and everything.
Kageyama who genuinely can not be in the same room with out asking you for help because he doesnât know how else to flirt with you.
Kageyama who will do everything in his willpower to get something done for you. If you even in passing say you need help moving something he will have it done in seconds.
Kageyama who walks you to classes to avoid the weird jocks, so he may as well hold you bag, and get you a snack.
Kageyama who just so happens to invite you to matches at the worst times, so the team begins to believe you to be a ghost. This goes on for months. One day you show up to practice to tutor Kageyama and the team loses their mind.
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Kenma becomes obsessive and we should talk about it more.
Obsessed Kenma who when he first met you decided your face is his favorite and he would do anything it takes to see it everyday
Kenma who loves when you yell at him and put him in his place. When you yell at him he just smiles and nods. When youâre done heâs pull you into a hug and kiss your hair.
Kenma who loves when you pull him by his tie when he isnât social enough during outings and watches you become animated when you go off.
Kenma who follows you around Ulta and âchecksâ the quality of a lipstick by kissing you.
Kenma who makes you a cup of tea every single night and lays his head on your stomach as you play with his hair without fail.
Kenma who has a massive crush on you even after years of marriage and gets too shy to speak when he sees you dressed up so he leaves post it notes around the house for you to find.
Kenma who litterly loves paying for you. It actually makes him happy knowing you didnât spend your own money.
Kenma who if he has a trip will kiss you goodbye and triple check you have everything you need and insists that you come with him just in case.
Kenma who loves the way you look in heels and has spent hours watching you try on heels.
Kenma who loves even more how when you complain about how your feet hurt he can pick you up and carry you home.
Kenma who follows every passing request of yours like itâs an order from a General.
âCan you take the trash out soon?â
âYes maâam, Iâll do that right now. Anything else?â
Kenma who would sits and watches you do your makeup for hours. It absolutely mesmerizes him and eventually he learns how to do it himself so if youâre in a rush it saves time. He ends up being really good at it.
Kenma who puts his hand on your knee and when you not there his hand still reaches out for you. He accidentally grabbed Kurooâs knee once.
Kenma who hates when youâre too far away. Heâs constantly pulling your chair closer, moving you by the hip, using an arm around the shoulder because youâre just too far away.
Kenma who loves using âmy wife needs meâ as an excuse to leave when in actuality itâs âI need my wife.â
In which Kenmaâs secretary accidentally signed all the little post-it note reminders with âlove youâ for months.
1.4k words. This was so fun writing omg.
I also need you to read this as obsessive Kenma from Dumpster Battle. When he speaks it's suppose to be in that tone. IYKWIM.
It was the luck of a thousand dandelions that landed you this job. All you really had to do was bring everyone (the five people that worked on your floor) whatever drink they wanted, write down whenever someone scheduled a meeting with your boss, let people in and out, and dress like a corporate girl boss. You got to say things like 'the boss will be right with you' and 'I can squeeze you in right around 2'.
It was amazing. You got to daydream, doomscrolling, and go on walks at your pleasure. You could sketch out runway looks, read fan fiction in an office setting, drink matcha on the companies card and unlimited PTO.
The very best part about it was getting to pretend to flirt with everyone who came in.
"The people coming in usually aren't as cute as you."
âI usually canât but for you Iâll make that happen handsome.â
"Id ask your name but I'll never forget your smile, gorgeous."
All day, everyday, living the dream.
Unfortunately, the only person that stopped you from fulfilling your dream of the flirty secretary persona was your boss, the one and only Kenma Kozume.
Your boss who you only really ever talk to when he tells you to change dates around happened to be so absurdly gorgeous that when you did talk to him all you could possibly manage was âyes sir, no sir, right away sir.â He would flash you that devastating smile and continue clacking away at his computer.
And god did he look good in a suit. The blush that creeped up your neck every single time you saw him in one should have given you're infatuation away months ago. (Un)fortunately however he never looked someone in the face longer than three seconds and was constantly on the move.
At team dinners when the few of you sat together he would stay the shortest and talk the least. He never announced his departures, just up and left. Heartbreaking, because he looked so charming in a collard shirt and slacks. Sigh.
Months moved along with the sounds of staples, coffee sips, and heels clicking along and your little crush on him bloomed into a hidden garden of sorts. It absolutely did not help when he started inspecting all the daily schedules you started leaving for him like they were blessings bestowed unto him by some sort of god.
The notes were busywork, just something to keep you out of boredom on slow days. They were also a great excuse to see him more often.
You see, recently you started writing little daily schedules for him on piece of note-pad paper and he had developed a habit of grinning at the little sticky note schedules. At first you had thought it was him being surprised at his workload. But even on less hectic days he read over your notes once, twice, three times before shoving them in his suit pocket grinning, giggling, and...blushing?
He started warming up a very little bit in the oddest ways. He'd bring you coffee a few odd times and complimented you once on a fashion choice you made. Whenever you passed him files he always looked far too deep in your eyes and thanked you. He greeted you every morning âgood morning, smartsâ snd double checked you had every paper and number you needed. He would make sure you never had too much on your plate any given day and always told you to get off early to rest and recover from the 'terrible' people you had to see everyday.
For a month or two you let it go to make sure you were not making anything up. Surely, it was all in your head. Surely, this wasn't right.
One unassuming absolutely beautiful crisp Friday in the heart of May, everything was bright and clean and bathed in a layer of sunshine that made it impossible to be upset at anything for too long. The coffee tasted better than usual and you decided to try on an old blush shade that complimented so well you were surprised you hadn't worn it down to the bone. You had gotten a new pair of kitten heels for the spring that were a little whimsical and a little enchanting. The day smelt like honeysuckles and Wedding Silk Santal by Kayali and your pen was a little extra smooth. It was by the very definition a 'good day'.
You sat at your desk writing up the next post-it for your boss on a lovely silk blue colored paper. You finish speedily as usual and stop to admire the way a specific 'z' had turned out when you noticed on your little signature at the bottom. It was a habit. After so long in the office you had signed of everything. But what you absolutely did not expect to find in almost unintelligible handwriting was a little 'love you' right next to your name.
What. The. Actual. HELL.
You look back on all the other ones you had written through the week and sure enough, a little 'love you' was left behind on every single on right next to your name. There was no way. Had you blacked out every time you had written the schedules? Had you been coma induced? How long had this been happening. WHY had this been happening?
Well, you knew why. All your life you had made a habit of hanging up the phone, ending notes, even finishing diary entries with 'love you,'s and unfortunately you forgot to break that habit when you got a job.
You noticed this when you started. All the papers from throughout the day had been marked like that and you quickly shut that down. You had thought for good. But clearly it gad grown back like an invasive weed.
Just your luck. After landing the perfect job with the most handsome boss you imagined you would end up losing it over your ridiculous habit of ending things with a flourish.
But....
If the notes had been ended like this for.... months now... Was that why he had been so giddy when he saw them? Why he kept them? Was that why he had been a bit of a tease recently?
Than you would have already been fired right? I mean the company and its twelve employees didn't exactly have an official HR in place yet. So...
Whatever, just act like it never happened, (this never happened, why would it happen, don't be silly) and push through. You rewrote the schedule, pointedly avoiding the 'love you' this time, neatly pressing it, stacked all the files for Mr. Kenma maybe you could be Mrs Kozume after all and knocked on his office door. It was a ritual, almost instinctive at this point.
After three knocks you let yourself in and let the stack down on the corner of his desk. He grabbed the note of the top of the stack hastily read through. He froze. Fuck. Obviously he would notice. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Its fine. Be clam. Yeah, that always works.
He raised the note in his hand and waved it around a little.
"Somethings different today, smarts."
Swallow. Breath.
"It's a perfectly beautiful day out sir."
He looked at you through narrowed eyes. He let his head drop a little and huffed. A delicate smile painted his face.
"Not quite what I mean."
... Um, shit, what DO you say now.
"I don't quite know what you mean."
"The note looks a bit off today. Do you know what about it, brains?" The note was back in your hands and you pretended to read it.
"Yeah, you have a big meeting with the processing guy no one really likes?"
"Not quite. Try again."
Swallow. Breathe. Swallow. Breathe.
"You mean the bottom?"
"You've got it now. What happened?"
"It was an old habit of mine from high school. Sorry if it" how do you put it? "uncomfortable."
His chair creaked as he sat back in it behind his mahogany desk.
"Well." Oh no. Oh no. "it's too late to change now." ...what? "I don't know if I can let you stop doing it."
The silence that filled in after that was sickeningly sweet.
"I'm... sorry?"
"Well I thought you were gonna say something eventually and I do love this game of cat-and-mouse we have going on. But I do think its pass time we start talking. Sit."
The seats across his desk stared at you and you couldn't bear to actually sit down. You settled on standing at the corner go his desk.
"Don't be like that already, dear, we've barely started speaking."
All of a second later you were sat down in the chair right up against his desk. His hand reaches across the desk to take hold of yours and a shiver suns down your spine.
"When shall I pick you up for diner tonight, smarts? Will I finally be able to see the better half of your wardrobe?"
Ushijima who hates when you carry any thing at all. Heâll take your backpack off your back and your water right out of your hands. It does not matter how inconsistent it is.
Ushijima who will check to make sure you are well through the day and if you didnât order food to be dropped off at your door.
Ushijima who will run any fashion decision by you first before stepping out the door.
Ushijima who genuinely yearns so bad for you when youâre not there. If youâre gonna for a long time heâll pull you into a long hug and say âI wasnât quite myself with you gone.â
Ushijima who hates spending money on litterly anything. Clothes, food, even new equipment. But heâd spend every last cent on you. His brain litterly turns off when it comes to spending money on you.
Ushijima who learns how to braid hair to make your night routine as quick and easy as possible.
Ushijima who sits and watches you do your makeup and is mesmerized by your lipstick. He loves when you kiss him and you leave a little stain on his lips.
Ushijima who stresses FOR you when you run late and would sell his soul to make sure you arrive on time for any event.
Ushijima who could never get upset with you even if he tried. If you leave things laying around in the most messy and inconvenient manor he would just risk and say he has to be better at cleaning up.
Ushijima who massages your back every. Single. Day. Because he can not stand you being upset. Like he would have a cup of tea ready for you and every thing.
Seeing all this hockey Iwa crossover is my two worlds colliding. I will absolutely write a full length fic on this.
Iwazumi who plays so aggressively on ice that you were scared to talk to him.
Iwazumi who board checks that one creep you had told one of the players about hard enough to take hims out for a game or two.
Iwazumi who immediately sits you down and ties your skates (between his big meaty thighs) and teaches you step by step the second you say you donât know how to skate.
Iwazumi who thinks about kissing you before and after every goal, and when you finally do kiss him, he says itâs 100x better than what he pictured.
Iwazumi who defends your honor anytime your name is brought up in the locker room tooth and nail.
Iwazumi who is really bad at flirting so he makes a bet with you that if he gets a hat trick youâd go out with him. He ends up scoring five points.
Iwazumi (as captain) who loves making the boys do bag skates when he catches them staring at you a little too long.
Iwazumi who sometimes plays his stick too hard into his hand just to see you patch up the scar that inevitably comes. And for you to maybe kiss it all better just for him.
Iwazumi who, before you got together, once tripped over five guys during a light toss up because he got the teenist bit distracted by you watching him.
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Seeing all this hockey Iwa crossover is my two worlds colliding. I will absolutely write a full length fic on this.
Iwazumi who plays so aggressively on ice that you were scared to talk to him.
Iwazumi who board checks that one creep you had told one of the players about hard enough to take him out for a game or two.
Iwazumi who immediately sits you down and ties your skates (between his big meaty thighs) and teaches you step by step the second you say you donât know how to skate.
Iwazumi who thinks about kissing you before and after every goal, and when you finally do kiss him, he says itâs 100x better than what he pictured.
Iwazumi who defends your honor anytime your name is brought up in the locker room tooth and nail.
Iwazumi who is really bad at flirting so he makes a bet with you that if he gets a hat trick youâd go out with him. He ends up scoring five points.
Iwazumi (as captain) who loves making the boys do bag skates when he catches them staring at you a little too long.
Iwazumi who sometimes plays his stick too hard into his hand just to see you patch up the scar that inevitably comes. And for you to maybe kiss it all better just for him.
Iwazumi who, before you got together, once tripped over five guys during a light toss up because he got the teenist bit distracted by you watching him.
A clip from Kenmaâs stream of him talking about his crush makes rounds on the internet and the person he (did)nât want seeing it does. Unfortunately, however, she thinks he talks about someone else entirely
Final part, let's go. I hope you like this because I have been very close to deleting this whole series twice. Inspired by the pride and prejudice theme song lowk.Â
He sighs and looks down into his hands. "We both know who they were about."
She sighs like she's defeated. "So then go talk to her."
What? That's not what I mean. Does she think...?
"No, that's not what I mean."
"Well then what do you mean, Kenma?"
She says his name so pointedly it could pierce skin.
Every time she said it since the whole library scene, it had been to encourage him. To get him to go out, go for that girl. But right now she's using it as a sword and fuck him, it's working. He was so mad and in love right at that moment he couldn't figure out words to explain himself.
"I mean those clips were about you."
He hated how quietly he said it and hated even more the silence that followed them. She stands there. She gets to stand there, with those gorgeous lashes, blinking, out of breath, pissed off. She is mad. Very much so. Obviously she is. She spent months helping him only for it all to be a lie.
She hates me. Iâll never get her. I need her. She probably never wants to see me.Â
"You don't get to say that." She scoffs.
âLet me explainââ
 âYouâre not allowed to lie to me for months, and have me put all this work in and decide now is the time to come clean.âÂ
"Well, l am going to say it. I have been obsessed with you since sophomore year. Everything about you. The way you tie your hair to the way you smell. I don't care if I can't say it, I've tried and failed to act like I'm not in love with you anymore." He lets out a long breath and looks at her so incredibly tenderly.Â
âI care about you. I love you. I think about you more than anything else. I'm sorry I lied to you. I didnât want to.â
âI just⌠It's a lot all at once. I've helped you all these months only to find out⌠God, I can't even say it. This doesn't feel real.â She runs a hand through her hair and lets out a breath into the cold night air.Â
His stomach is full of acid and there's a taste of salt on his tongue. The silence rings in his ears.Â
Heâs losing this battle.Â
âWhat can I say to fix this? Please. Iâm sorryâŚIâm so sorry.âÂ
He looks at her with those big eyes, almost crying. Those soft, sweet eyes that always get their way and he knows it. His hand twitches to reach out to gently tuck to hair behind her ear.Â
She stiffens at the touch but softens after a few seconds and lets him.Â
âYou donât have to say anything.â She puts her hand up to stop him from saying anything. âI'm sorry too⌠I'm not upset. Iâm just embarrassed, I think.â She sighs and lessens the gap in between them just a bit. âBecause, well, Iâve liked you for so long too its⌠Fuck, Iâm crying.âÂ
She wipes away her tears and lets out a miniature laugh.Â
Ugh, I need to kiss her right now.Â
He subconsciously leans forward shortening the space between them to a single breath. He gently brushes a tear from her face as he hovers over her.Â
âPlease.â He lets out so quietly he's not sure he said anything at all.Â
Her eyes flutter closed before nodding. Months and months of secrets fade into oblivion. Years of built up tension slow down into the single moment where his lips brush hers as smooth and soft as silk. He groans and leans into her, holding her face in his palms to get deeper, farther, more, more, more. Everything feels like lightning and crashing waves. His hands brush over her cheeks and behind her neck. She anchors herself to him by reaching into his hair. He breaks the kiss for a moment to catch their breaths.Â
âThis is usually the part where you ask me on a date.â She lets out that beautiful laugh that lured him in like a siren call.Â