Don't Smoke Crayolas

connor storrie at the YSL Winter'26 PFW After Party 🥂 (📸 gushchinadash)

I wanted to bring my Shane bodily fluid bracelet back to you because I know how much you love it! In another ask of mine you were exploring the idea of the bracelet being made during the hookup era and Shane not believing it be real at first. What do you think Shane's reaction was when Ilya showed it to him in person the first time?

I feel like Shane would almost admire it as Ilya is animatedly discussing what was in each vial and how he was able to acquire it. Shane does think it's super fucking hot that Ilya carries it around with him all the time.

natttttt yes okay IMO i think its super fun to think he created it while still just hooking up cause like... idk them being so clearly way more into each other than just a casual hookup has me in a chokehold!!!!!!

i think after shane watched that game and saw it on ilya's wrist and had the flashback of him talking about it and realizing it was real, he's torn just a little bit

he knows that that is WAY too much for this to be casual. like actually kinda insane. but also.... it REALLY turns him on. like... classic shane hollander line: "that's so fucking hot."

and the next time they hookup, I think shane is shoving ilya against the door, kissing him hard and fast and sloppy, then demands. "show it to me. now."

ilya knows, shane doesn't have to explain. he rolls up the sleeve of his shirt and shows him. shane stares in wide eyed amazement.

he goes over each little bead, what's inside of them. shrugs his shoulders like it's nothing and says, "you are mine, yes? i like to keep what is mine very close."

"holy shit, rozanov. fuck."

“Lucky”

“The luckiest ;)”

ANYWAY. Kevin is up on the rooftop and his lighter isn’t working, and out comes some hottish blond guy who starts smoking a cigarette looking over the barrier. Kevin contemplates asking blond guy for a light, but like, what if this guy is up here to off himself? He certainly looks capable, with the way he’s brooding (getting hotter every minute) and puffing that cigarette. But before Kevin can decide out comes another guy, this one with black hair, and this guy is more Kevin’s type so he’s definitely hot, and him and blondie start talking, and Kevin thinks that he better reveal himself now because like, it’ll be awkward if they see him staring, but black hair dude is obviously drunk and Kevin ALWAYS gets roped into taking care of the drunk friend— “SO WHAT THEN?” the black haired guy yells and Kevin goes eeek okay this is a couple queens having a fight probably two of the waiters from the reception Kevin will just make his exit quietly he does not need to get in the middle he’s got his own situationship blowing up his phone that he left in his violin case but then when blondie turns fully he sees that they’re in real formal wear, not waiter garb and not the shitty Sears tux Kevin wears for gigs. So these queens are having a spat, and Kevin realizes that they HAVE to be players, and now he’s frozen to the spot. “I go home in three days,” blondie says, and Kevin realizes he’s Eastern European, thinks that’s hot, but then wonders if that’s problematic to think, but then black hair hottie is holding out a hand for a handshake and Kevin almost laughs like okay gay, but OMG NOW THEY’RE KISSING and Kevin really needs new glasses, was that tongue omg— “we’re both in tuxedos out in public!” Aww black haired hottie’s voice cracked this is sad they must be like, lower level players or whatever, just glad to be here, struggling with being gay, maybe Kevin should help them—

“Hollander. See you next season.”

Hollander. Hollander. Kevin had been barely listening but isn’t that the guy they announced for one of the awards. Shit— are these queens a big deal?

So later, Kevin goes on Reddit and does a deep dive about Shane Hollander, Canadian phenom, Rookie of the Year, finding one forum where he poses the question. “Is Shane Hollander gay? I think I saw him with some guy!”

And two years later (no phone company, Kevin finally landed a full time orchestra job in LA) he gets ONE lone answer on otherwise deserted forum:

so prim :)

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