uuuuuuuuurgh

i am, thank fucking everything, no longer working for him, and yet. i quit before leadership could force my lead to fire me. a disproportionate amount of queer people have been fired or forced to leave in the last year, bc he has personally been sending messages pressuring all leads to pick a "weak link" and going on about culture fit in ways that are fucking loaded. and then there's the exodus of ex-leads who have been saying clearly that they quit instead of being forced to fire people, and the whole team of quality engineers that was axed late last year (oh but it's not a layoff, they all magically had bad performance despite great individual performance reviews, one of them being on parental leave, and all of them being blindsided), and so on and so on...

I'm sure everyone's heard by now that something's happened at least so I'll try keep it short [lie]. This post is a rough explanation and not a defense, if mutuals want to add evidence of what I claim then please do so, I will have a note to friends at the end, feel free to skip to that 🧡🤎

I got terminated on predstrogen due to mass false reports about sexually explicit content, I had evidence of these mass false reports, and when I asked support for help they stated "As you know, you posted sexually explicit content and additionally harrassed people"

My issue isn't with the account termination, it's the double standard around it

I've had multiple accounts. The first (madhopz) was terminated for content on sideblogs when I was doing sex work and I know I won't get it back. The second (sadhopz) was targetted by lolcow forums, and took half a year to get back, only once I humiliated myself to support by screenshotting and documenting what they were saying about me and sharing images of me. The third (predstrogen) I mentioned and I'll get back to, but I was never emailed to explain why the fourth (Avewy/Predesterone) was terminated. All we know is that it was right after the CEO got upset with me, I broke no rules and said no one should attack anyone, I posted no explicit content, none.

A man twice my age and worth $400,000,000 threatened to call the cops on a trans woman online, and then deleted me when I mentioned this

To add insult to injury, he refused to call me "she" the entire time, referring to me as "they" and backpedalling to vaguely refer to me as The Account. I'm a fucking person, and you know that by threatening to pin the cops on me. Eventually even slipping and calling me "it" before respecting the womanhood of the person he would gladly talk about and "make an exception for"

My complaint to his post was that he says I was banned for harrassment, which is a lie. I was banned for mass false reports of sexual content, despite having been told by staff directly a month prior that my blog does not break that rule, and have had people admit to collaborating on reports. But my biggest issue is that even if I was banned for harrassment, then what did they do about my own harrassment?

They did fuck all and told me my stalkers should not be removed from Tumblr

After banning me without a reason, I immediately got an email back about harrassment and stalking that I sent a support ticket about in December. They banned me twice before looking into this, and their conclusion was "we won't do a thing". These are people who have been on my ass all of last fucking year calling me a rapist and a pedophile, and they ignored it. Does that sound like a man who cares about harrassment on his site, or only when it happens to him?

After the ban on Predstrogen and I moved to Avewy, they were everywhere. Inbox messages claiming I was sending asks to children threatening to rape them, anonymous people stating they're our victim and are scared to speak out about what I did to them. It all only happened now. They've turned a blind eye and given these people a win. I saved it all in an #archive tag as proof if I was ever asked or got through to support, but that didn't happen when i was terminated without warning or reason

When Matt deleted me himself, he deleted everything I posted and saved as evidence for my situation. Anonymous asks slandering me, reblogs of people organising to get rid of me, my own documentation of what staff did, all of it was deleted with @avewy/@predesterone.

I don't want to be on this site anymore, I was happy all day today because I feel free without it. But I miss my accounts, because of all the memories with them. I don't want to use them, but I want @madhopz, @predstrogen, and @predesterone back so that all the times ive had with friends, lovers and strangers arent completely eradicated. Every single thing uploaded to Predstrogen is gone and marked mature now, even my face and identity, because this was a sexual content ban and not harrassment as they say. They found another reason after the fact

Give me my identity and my memories back

To all my friends and mutuals, thank you. Even people I've had falling-outs with have been nothing but kind and I want everyone to know I appreciate it. I saw every ask before deletion, I see how many people are on Discord. I can't keep up, but knowing you reached out at all means the world to me

I was happier today off this site than I have been in months. I'm not driving myself to breakdowns anymore by being on here, my mental and emotional state has been in ruins. Maybe I'll come back on this account, but for now I'm leaving it blank and still and moving on.

This post is incredibly meandering and too long, but I'm not trying to defend myself or document everything, I'm trying to make sure I say something to people I care for instead of disappearing, you deserve it. I'm doing well, please find me elsewhere.

My Twitter is mAD_h0PZ

My Cohost is Predstrogen

My BlueSky is predstrogen.bsky.social

My discord is Avewy, and my server is Public

My steam is mAD_hOPZ

Goodnight, thank you 🧡🤎

I swear this shot is a direct reference to a similar one in KLK (the main difference is that the UPL one zooms out while the KLK one zooms in)

doing the Anime News Network audits (where you can help with genres and classifications of the anime you've said you've watched at least some of) and

Once again: is getting impaled by your own rifle supposed to be erotic? EDIT: this is also weirdly erotic to me, didn't expect Alucard to have any of that outside of the way he talks in the dub

adorable pyjamas (that I'd say fit her character more than the nightie she wore in the Gonzo anime) and an adorable :3 face