be cool, soda pop

I’m a normal adult woman with interests appropriate for my age bracket. That said, Tom Holland should fire his agents and hire me. Tom Holland thinks his audience is primarily men and makes movies for mostly their viewing pleasure; Tom Holland is wrong and Tom Holland shouldn’t. Tom Holland, do you think MEN account for the 175 MILLION YouTube views of you performing “Umbrella” in drag? I assure you they do not. Tom Holland is married to one of the most beautiful and popular women in the world FOR A REASON. Tom Holland thinks he is Mark Wahlberg but Tom Holland is Hugh Grant. Tom Holland should be in Jane Austen adaptations. Tom Holland should be in romantic comedies. Tom Holland should be speaking with his natural British accent at all times. If Timothee Chalamet had even an ounce of Tom Holland’s effortless likability, he’d have won four Oscars already. Tom Holland is for women!