an open letter for my kareshi
i was already typing as you began saying your goodnight, but thanks to your distractions and cute little phone call, i canβt seem to find the words to say so i can properly start this letter. or at the very least, words that might be able to help me explain how i feel for youβ¦ if thereβs actually a way to do that.
i usually write when my mindβs a mess and the thoughts are everywhere. but right now my mind is clear and only knows one thing: you.
youβre just everything i never thought i needed til you started making everything feel so light, yet so full. i read somewhere that someday, you get to meet an adventure and a home, all bundled up in one person. and for me, thatβs you. it will always be you.
we didnβt really start off as people who knew theyβd end up flirting with each other. instead, we started off as friends playing the same game, having the same interests in anime, sharing the same hobbies, even cracking the same lame ass jokes, and enjoying each otherβs company as platonic buddies. but as time passes, it just felt like i really had to tell you and you really had to know: i wanna be with you.
to be perfectly honest, i still donβt know where this is going or how iβm going to finish this post. all i know is that you make everything feel so light and so right that it makes me think that this might be what right timing feels like. you make everything so safe and calming that i donβt have to worry that what i have with you is something that was forced or fake or rushed like the ones before. because youβre not them; and with sheer delight, i can really say that they can never be you.
iβm writing this now because someday my future self would be able to read this and think,Β βgod you were so in loveβ but laugh to herself because she still thinks sheβs in love. because i feel like i will be hopelessly in love with you for a very long time, and it wouldnβt matter because youβll be here for a very long time. iβve always been unsure of what the future might hold (i still am), but i know iβm glad i chose to be in love with you. i will always choose me, but choosing me means choosing you.
i donβt think i fell in love. i donβt think i dove head first, either. i know i took my sweet time to walk in love with you. to consciously decide every single time that i wanna be in love with you. i know weβre not in a relationship just yet, but i also know that this is just one of the things in life where i can take my time waiting without feeling scared. and iβve never felt so at peace with the fact that iβm waiting for something, because i know that iβm waiting for something worth it. iβm waiting for you.
i like you a lot. iβm not gonna say the other L-word just yet, because i believe itβs almost there. weβre almost there.
iβll be waiting for youβ¦ with you.
dededos
germansingergirl
turnnoffyourmind
prguitarman
annaxmalina
theartofmadeline
tangentwithtanner
ellievsbear
