🌀🌈Mezzo🌧️✨

I saw her losing the glow on her fur.

I watched her getting weaker by the day

I watched her get so weak she couldn't stand anymore

It made me not want to stand anymore.

She was aways sleeping

I was aways sleeping too.

I wish I could sleep.

I just want to sleep.

I don't want to have sex.

I just want to become one with the mattress.

I don't want to have sex.

I just want to dissolve into the bedsheets.

I don't want to have sex.

I feel something is missing inside of me.

It's bubbling up.

Today I went to my friend's house cuz our friend group(the cult of Dyonisus) had organized a surprise for his birthday. We made cake, sweets and a lil Guilty Gear tournament. On the way there I met this man that was waiting for the bus with me, his name was Vanderval I recall. He was really kind, looked like he was around his early 50s and was going to Bom Prato to make food donations. He talked a bit about his life, how he helps his sick ex wife, and how making donations is important to him. He also thought that I didn't look like I was a lesbian because I don't have a nose ring or dress butchy hahaha. He was cool.

I also told Ãh-Hã(this is a nickname for another person who's older and that I actually know for yeats now, this os personal so I don't feel like goving context anyway. I know who he is) about my girlfriend and he was actually PROUD of me, he was really happy and said he looked up to me. It made really happy too.

Makes me happy when older people act cool anout my sexuality and aren't bigots.

I saw my girlfriend's mom, and she smiled to me realmy sweetly and said hi, but I didn't go inside her house so I felt really awkward. I know she doesn't want me there but the way she greeted me made me think maybe she doesn't dislike me that much? I don't really feel like thinking about her.

The Guilty Gear sessions where the most fun I've had in MONTHS holy shit, I REALLY NEEDED to play irl with friend's it's just priceless.

Overall, I'm happy.

My body is made to be broken into little pieces

My body is made of garbage

I have new friends. Amazing ones, who are there for me. I'm happy. I love myself, I love myself a lot. I have love in my heart. My life has meaning, I don't feel alone anymore. Every single hole you left in my heart is full now, and overflowing even. Yet, I miss you.

I don't miss you because I need you, I miss you because I love you.

I'm high on sleeping pills

I though about you and felt lightheaded

I'm so dizzy

"I still love you, and I wish you could just tell me."

"Will you stay with me?" or "can I finally give up and move on?"

"I'm tired of waiting."

I'm high on sleeping pills

I though about you and felt lightheaded

I'm so dizzy

Golden Retriever

New art style...

Back in april I made this edit and posted it on Instagram with the caption "Good night, sleep well pharaoh." Now it feels prophetic.

Takahashi-sensei changed the world for the better. If you need proof, just look at the milions of Yu-gi-oh fans around, just look at how many people talk about how much his work changed them, how much his art made us happy, inspired us, molded the people we are. His work will live forever in us, he impacted pop culture in ways that make me smile everytime I think about it, because of how amazing it is. Takahashi-sensei changed the world, he changed my world and for that I am eternally greatful. It hurts, but I'm still smiling while writing this, because his work just makes me overflow with joy even when I'm in pain, even when I'm in tears.

Good night. Sleep well, pharaoh.