the pretty stars shine for you

“i have no idea how he’d be with kids, i can’t even picture it to begin with. i don’t want to picture anyone in our age range with children, far too young for it.” a year later she’d be pregnant herself, how funny. “background music makes the movie, our entire album needs to be award winning.” it was always fun to plan out things that never would be, not in any sane persons mind at least. “one gym day for the entire year.”

“Oh no, ew, ew, ew. I mean like somebody else’s kids, you know? Nope, none of us could handle kids right now. That’s way too much responsibility. These are prime mess up years,” she replied quickly, an over exaggerated look of horror on her face. “It really is. What do you think our song should be? I’m going with Lady Dujour by Johnny Gill. It’s so smooth.” A lazy smile rested on the girl’s lips as she stared at Bethany.

       “you,” it wasn’t a lie, was it? that was what he was thinking about at that exact moment as his darker eyes skimmed over her once more, the talk of her mismatched nail polish forgotten – it would not come up again. there was something about her red hair that captivated him, something about the way he knew there was so much more inside of her that he would never get around to figuring out if he let on that he knew. “makes sense,” he agreed, although, they both probably knew full well in their own right that it made no sense whatsoever. eric imagined there was some greater narrative, some explanation, but it was one that he was not lucky enough to understand, “do you want to go out with me?”

You. Such a little word, and yet it caused the redhead’s mind to truly go blank for a moment. Not in the way she was so used to pretending, but in genuine surprise. His question left her little time to recover, the nail polish bottle slipping from her fingers onto the bench beside her. “Um,” she let slip, momentarily flustered as she reached up to tuck a red curl behind her ear. “You mean like, out out? Like date out?” The cluelessness in her voice was thick, but for once it wasn’t entirely false. “Because, I’d like that. But if you’re talking like, go out bowling with a bunch of people in a totally casual way, that’s rad too. Yeah.”

“A voice I’m not familiar with, repeating my name. Again and again. As if it’s telling me to wake up. It sounds really strange, non?” A twirl of her golden hair at the thought, one she loses once the compliment is given. Karen’s love for her is a constant, soft thing that she returns with care. “Oh, thank you, so was yours.” Humming in the language of all things love, her eyes light up at the mention of the midnight kiss. “Any recalls of who the lucky one was? One of the new students, perhaps?” Her own heart and cheeks flutter and flush of first love. “I spend the last and first moments of the year with Martin.”

“Really strange. I think that would have freaked me out. I’m not really a fan of the whole distant voices thing,” she shrugged, reaching up to tuck a stray curl back behind her ear. Loretta’s face was alight, her smile as bright as the morning sun that was just beginning to make an appearance on the horizon. “Is it bad that I honestly have no idea? I think it might have been a townie, actually,” Karen giggled, leaning into the other girl. The pink that rose to Loretta’s cheeks didn’t escape her notice, and she nudged her gently with her shoulder before speaking. “Oh my goodness, that’s so cute. That definitely sounds like a great way to ring in the year.”

“What can I say? I’m rumoured to be the best at trying,” she made out the words as if they were a joke but it was true, nobody tried harder than Sarah to keep things running. Maybe that was why she was so lost in the dares, they weren’t dangerous, they were school morale to her. Perhaps in time others would see that the game had never really had any consequences, it was just fun. “Just the normal, meet a cute boy, make Howard crack a smile, figure out when Charles got his Christmas six pack and conquer the world. Nothing big.”

“True, true,” she nodded at Sarah’s words, voice light. Sarah always seemed to be at her best. She was funny, smart, a winner. In many senses of the word, Sarah was the best that Whittemore had to offer. Even being able to spend time with her somehow made the redhead feel like more, like she had some sort of potential to get there someday. A bright laugh escaped her lips as she shook her head, the casual mention of Charles’ abs momentarily catching her off guard. “Oh my god, that’s definitely a list. Somehow I think the hardest thing on it isn’t conquering the world.”

“we’ll drag him into it, force him to have some fun as our watcher. who else can we trust with our drunk selves to be an actually decent person. we can also force him to bring that camera of his to take photos as evidence, or maybe even have him be the director of our ridiculous movie.” she teased, laughing at the thought of it all. she had originally meant it as a joke, and yet she was now starting to consider it. “i’ll need some green stuff and gym time after our wild night.”

“You’re right. I’d trust Charles with just about anything, except maybe kids. I feel like they’d start cryin’ and he’d just go into panic mode, you know? But yes, yes, yes, the camera is the perfect idea! We can have Johnny Gill playing in the background of our movie.” Momentarily, the red head’s nose wrinkled in distaste, but it wasn’t long before a slight sigh left her lips. “You’re right, we’ll probably need some recovery food. I suppose one gym day wouldn’t kill us.”

“oh yeah, we plan to get drunk off our asses so we forget everything, but make sure we do some crazy things and leave prints so we can go on an adventure of finding out what we did. it’s actually quite plausible, we can use our being drunk as an excuse for our intentionally crazy behavior.” she had to make something so basic sound somewhat intelligent, when in reality it wasn’t, just her desperation to seem smarter than she really was. “sounds like an easy one, better than just making sure to go to the gym. the only thing on the list “have hella levels of fun.” it’s perfect.” beth laughed at the simplicity and yet joy that would come from it, along with potential regret. “only thing i could really think of doing.”

“Yes! That sounds absolutely perfect, it’s like somethin’ out of the movies. We could even have, like, a designated sober person who makes sure we remember to leave prints. Maybe we can use pictures as the prints! Maybe Charles could be our designated sober person...Actually, he probably wouldn’t have too much fun with that,” Karen rambled on, somehow managing to speed up a significant amount throughout her stream of words. Beth’s laugh filled the air and the redhead grinned at her friend, happy to see the other girl letting herself relax. “So much better than just going to the gym or eating more green stuff.”

“Hm. Dreams have a strange way of feeling real. I had a hallucination once. It was not a dream, for sure, but it was not completely real either. I also had a little much champagne, a lot of sweets.” And a charming Martin on her arm, enough to make her feel like she was dreaming, “How was your New Year, dreamboat? I think I ran into you before the countdown.”

“What was your hallucination,” the word fell clumsily from her lips before she continued, “about, Lor?” Curiosity seeped into her tone, the girl wondering what kind of images too much champagne and sweets would bring. The things she saw when intoxicated were mostly doubles and bright lights. “Oh, yes, I remember that! Your outfit was so cute,” she smiled, the memory a bit hazy but there if she concentrated. “It was a wonderful night! I don’t remember very much, but I’m pretty sure I got the always hoped for midnight kiss. How was yours?”

        “walking, thinking,” he shot back, his gaze glancing to the purple nail polish that the girl was holding in her hand, his gaze not questioning at all. “didn’t think purple was the colour for someone of your complexion,” he joked, knowing already that the red head would barely respond to his comment with anything but dim laughter. karen was smart. he knew that. much smarter than him, something eric was not afraid to admit for he knew he was not the smartest of the whittemore kids even if he was the only one even if his brain was filled with the most general knowledge – a complete collection of pointless information and a few secrets. “guessing you’ve just been avoiding assignments?”

The fair girl’s red lips tilted up in a lazy grin at Eric’s joke, a slight laugh escaping her. “Didn’t think you were such a fashionista, Mr. Bellamy.” Reflecting on his earlier response, Karen looked up at him. “What were you thinkin’ about?” she hummed, gesturing for the boy to sit down beside her on the bench. Avoiding assignments. In a way, he wasn’t wrong. There were several assignments she’d simply decided she could survive not doing, and had tossed the assignment sheets into the garbage can once returning to her room. The only one that seemed of particular importance had been started and completed on the 1st, written well enough to earn her a grade that would ensure at least a C overall in the class. “You betcha,” she simply replied, her gaze directed at the boy, nails momentarily forgotten.

     Oh, life seemed so simple for Karen in that moment. He almost envied that. Although he often wondered if she felt the same as him, rejected by a set of parents who were incapable of loving them both for who they were. It was different and yet the same, “I envy that, Karen. I have no faith, it seems to defy me each time I try.”

Charles had always seemed so serious. Ever since they were children, since she was eleven years old and trying to make sense of how exactly she fit in with all of the other children Orson and Cassandra cared for. She could see it on his face as she looked up at him, the weight of the world appearing to weigh him down. “Oh, Charles,” she sighed, tone half-teasing, half-genuinely upset. “I could try to help you find some.” It was an honest offer, one she would do her best to complete in whatever way she could. “It’s just that you think too much, too hard, for it to be very easy. Sometimes, to have faith, you just gotta turn your mind off for a little while.” Or seven years.

For some reason, even though Daisy knew it wasn’t really dream at all, it made her feel better to tell someone about it and have them sympathize with her. Even if it wasn’t real. Even if she was still trapped in her mother’s body in, what must have been, her time at Whittemore. The hand on her back was unexpected and the girl tensed up, but after only a couple of seconds she relzed into it. It was nice to have someone comforting her instead of running away. “Thank you. I know you wouldn’t. I know none of you would let something happen to me.” And as the words tumbled out of her mouth, Daisy wasn’t sure if she believed them. Could she trust them? After what she knew about her mother, could she trust anyone she met here?

The soft smile remained on the girl’s lips as she nodded, the action firm, as if she had no doubts. Whittemore was all that Karen had, all that she had ever really had. The past seven years of her life had been spent here, and it was the people here who she considered her family, even if it was a watered down definition of the word. “You know what? I think you need a distraction. Something to melt away the bad dream.” The girl paused for a moment, thinking over the options. An idea struck and the subdued mood she had been in disappeared. “Do you wanna watch The Breakfast Club? Oh, or I have The Princess Bride in my room. We can make ice cream sundaes!"

At the mention of Warwick his fears were confirmed. Chase was back at Whittemore. But somehow, it was 1992. Oh, and he was his father. “A lot,” he answered as he followed in the girl’s footsteps. “I think rest will help, though. You know, just sleep it off.” And wake up from this nightmare. 

Rest. Karen had told the boy she would take him to Warwick, but as the little paper that had slid through her bedroom door came to mind, she began walking in an entirely different direction. If he truly didn’t know his way around the campus, this wouldn’t be as hard as she had initially thought it would be. “Sleeping it off sounds like a great idea. And, you know, I know the best place to nap around here. It’s a bit of a secret, but since it seems like it’s an emergency, I’ll share.”

“You know what’s stupid? New Years Resolutions. Honestly, if people want to change their lives they should just do it whenever it’s convenient.” She was only mildly serious, “Plus, I can’t think of a good one. Is karma going to come after my ass if I don’t have one?” Superstitious was one thing she was not, but it was always interesting information to have. A conversation piece to save for later, people liked conversation pieces. And Sylvia liked talking, to get information out of people that would be of use for her later. Once you got someone talking it was easy enough to keep it going. Turning to the other person she gave a slight smile. “You come up with anything good?”

“I don’t think karma is in charge of resolutions, so I think you’re good there,” Karen laughed. “I think they’re supposed to be one of those things you hold yourself to. Like through guilt, maybe? I’m not sure, I don’t think I’ve ever stuck with mine.” Turning to Sylvia, she was pleased to see a slight smile on the girl’s face. It always felt as if Sylvia was miles ahead of the rest of them, speeding off to something better, so any chance she had to speak with the girl was exciting. “So far rearrange my room and achieve a hella good time with Bethany. What about you, Sylvia? Or do you not do them?”

      quiz master. quiz master. quiz master. answer the damn question, eric. you have to know the answer.

    it was a new year but the memory of his latest encounter on the panel still filled his mind, like a living nightmare and waking hell combined, he was no prisoner to his mind, a spineless fool at times but nothing more. the world had not unlocked the genius that would be his undoing, somewhere just beneath a panel door that was waiting to be lifted by a combination of strange events – life.

     the air was cool, his jumper rolled at the sleeves, a breeze against bare wrists that were marked with indistinguishable red lines, the marks of a rubber band snapped too many time. the human condition was a curious thing, splintered in so many places and confusing as hell but eric had found that his studies on himself had taught him that people could be manipulated into whatever the world asked of them. these were thoughts that were kept to himself, a side project that had little to do with his reputation as one of whittemore’s whiz kids. leaves trod beneath his shoes as he approached a person sitting on the courtyard bench, “whatcha doing?” 

Acetone. ‎C3H6O. A solvent used for plastics manufacturing, as well as the primary ingredient in nail polish removers. Additionally used for degreasing wool and degumming silk. Recognized to have low acute and chronic toxicity. 

Karen studied the purple liquid in her hand, cotton rounds beside her on the wooden bench. Somewhere in the black hole that was her purse could be found three bottles of nearly identical nail polish, as well as a shimmery glitter color she usually saved for special occasions. A huff escaped her full lips as she continued to harshly scrub at the chipped red polish on her nails, wishing she had decided to simply suck up the chemical smell that came with doing her nails in her bedroom. She would have gone to the common room, except she knew that in higher concentrations the chemical could cause headaches, and that was the last thing she wanted to bring to the table. The girl didn’t realize someone was approaching until she heard their voice, looking up from her task and giving a quick grin to the speaker. “Hi, Eric. I’m just paintin’ my nails,” she shrugged, continuing to scrub at the polish. “What are you up to?”

“i think it’d be kind of fun to forget the night before and go on some grand adventure figuring it all out. only if it’s safe and the adventure leads to being in the arms of an attractive male and my life being changed for the better.” beth teased, joking along with karen. “we need to get to the level of hella soon then, if we both have been missing out on it.” dumb reason to hang out, but beth needed to keep her social life somewhat alive. “not much, went to a few local parties but none were all that great. took some shots, but stayed overall sober a most of the night.”

“Ooh, I like the way you’re thinking, Beth. We could definitely arrange that. Next girl’s night, for sure,” she laughed, excitement clear in her tone. Karen was always up for an adventure, and the one Bethany described sounded even more enjoyable than what had taken place the night before. “That can be our resolution. Achieve hella levels of fun in 1992!” Finally, a resolution the girl would be able to keep. Karen nodded along as Bethany described her night, the event sounding like a good enough time. “Shots are always good. It sounds like you rang in the year right.”