I AM NOT AFRAID TO KEEP ON LIVING

the translation is significantly more Soviet in tone than the original, which is great

*leaves

where are you going

I hate you Ozempic craze I hate you 'heroin chic' I hate you weight loss ads on public radio I hate Burn Fat Fast ads every thirty seconds I hate you I hate you I hate you

I grew up before the term 'thigh gap' was invented I grew up before 'hip dip' was invented I was born before 'muffin top' was a thing before 'clean girl look' was a thing before 'glass skin' was a thing before razoring off peach fuzz was a thing and I'm so so so fucking tired of us inventing new concepts purely for the purpose of convincing people to hate their own bodies enough to buy products

@gumi-megpoidd

drink water

Maybe do these in reverse order

Don't listen to them! Transgender BDSM now!!!!

washing dishes is evil because you go "oh fuck there's so many dishes this is gonna take foreverrr" and then you enter the dish abyss and emerge with your abdomen somehow covered in water and your hands all wrinky and then you look at the clock and what felt like half an hour was actually 10 minutes

[ID: Art of two astronauts floating together in space, facing each other and holding hands as if dancing. /end ID]

gift shopping for younger cousins is so scary like I want to be cool. but not seem clingy. or seem distant. but I want them to know that I care about them so so much and I am always here if they need someone to talk to. and also we only see each other like once a year. but I held them when they were babies and saw them grow up and I Want Them To Know I Care So So Much,

how do I let this middle schooler know id die for them on a $20 budget

My day is going suspiciously well. What's up with this

There was a big fire in the building not far from my workplace and I asked some random people on the sidewalk what was going on and they were like, yeah restaurant fire spread, it's all good now, everyone's fine, and I was like ohhh okay, I wanted to see how this would affect me specifically and they were like, just take the whole day off, tell your boss you were in the restaurant, and this fire fighter standing next to us was like Yeah I'll vouch for you lmfaoooo