do you ever look at a friend and feel soooooo affectionate
i’m glad this is the post of mine to get a degree of notes, fuck yeah friends
YOU ARE THE REASON

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@kalpaca
do you ever look at a friend and feel soooooo affectionate
i’m glad this is the post of mine to get a degree of notes, fuck yeah friends

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Notebook Paper Crochet Blanket
Imagine a bee rn in a hive muttering "the beekeeper is not real because he is not intervening or helping me at all with this disastrous relationship I have with another bee". now imagine that's you talking about the good lord. now imagine a dog with a propeller hat on
Filing this in my memory right next to this thread:
is anyone imagining a dog with a propeller hat on
Masterpost
“Where are the trans men in history?” See. When you're born a gender that was forcefully married off, who had to live most of their life indoors, when you had to raise children, and had a lobotomy if your family thought you were a tad too odd, it's kinda hard to come out as a trans man now ain't it.
forever my lineage would use his wrong pronouns but not me
[Image ID: Tumblr tags reading: I have an ancestor who 'pretended to be a man' for years, according to my relatives he did so in order to go to school to become a doctor, and he was eventually found out and wed off to a man and had a family, and forever would be revered for being able to get a degree 'posing as a man', but apparently even after marriage he still dressed in men's clothes and preferred to be seen as a man, forever my lineage would use his wrong pronouns but not me, I see him and I hope he smiles upon me knowing I am living a life he would have dreamed just getting to be a trans man, without being forcefully wed off and forced to have children for the sin of being born with a vagina, such is history with trans mascs, I once saw someone online say:, 'if history has a gaping hole where a minority should be, it's not because they did not exist/did not contribute, it's because they were erased', and I think about that a lot when I see stories like my ancestors knowing that our history has constantly been defiled, just like this /End ID]

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do not taste plants if you don't know what they are
do not identify a fruit as edible just because it tastes sweet
hope you didn't eat any fucking seeds, bro
And today, we have this winner:
I saw the photo in my feed and went ohh, dude, no, we do not handle yellow rocks with our bare hands until we know for sure what they are. And I know that orange...
In comments, they continue:
and that's where I started cussing at the computer monitor. But someone else had got there first:
So just as a reminder, folks. If you don't know what it is, don't put it in your fucking mouth!
YOU GODDAMN STUPID MOTHERFUCKER
hate being married to a forensic anthropologist because he'll be like yeah I think this is bone :) let me lick it to see :) hey honey lick this and test if it's bone :) like No I Don't Think I Will
was just getting my face painted by a kid at a face paint booth and while they were painting a snake on my cheek they said "you're like the stillest person i've ever painted" and i love getting complimented so much i will hold onto this forever. got a good grade in getting my face painted. no one is doing it like i am. do you think you're stiller than me? i have to laugh.
Indigenous peoples of the great plains should've never told white people about tornadoes. "I don't know man that shit never happened before you showed up"

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How is anybody having a baby right now... Groceries for one is $90
No offense to babies
goodbye $200 helloooo 3 groceries
count dracula? uhhh ok. one
🧛 nathing vrong vith me
when i was at walgreens (at 3 in the morning which explains all of this) the cashier was talking to her coworker about how shed rather be a werewolf than a vampire because vampires are condemned to hell but werewolves arent and then she asked me what i thought and i said vampire because im already condemned to hell and she said in the nicest tone of voice “i dont think anybody is condemned to hell….” paused, stared at me for a few moments, and added on “…not even gay people”
Happy pride month to the filthiest most brutal read I’ve ever been given in my life

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I took my little brother (autistic, mostly non verbal) out and he was using his voice keyboard to tell me something, and this little boy (maybe 4 or 5?) heard him and asked me "Is he a robot??" I tried to explain to him that no, he isn't a robot, he just communicates differently, but my darling brother was in the background max volume "I am robot I am robot I am robot I am robot"
My little brother insisted if I was going to post about him, he wanted a cut of the "profits". When I explained to him that Tumblr isn't monetized, and is pretty pointless, he and my older brother pointed out that he'd still be bringing me "fame and notoriety" if the post got "big". So we agreed, if the post hit 10k notes, which seemed extremely farfetched and silly at the time, I'd take my little brother out for sushi (his favorite food) and let him eat as much as he wants.
I guess God wanted the little robot to enjoy some sushi 🍣 🥲