These past months have been a battle. And I’m still fighting.

Every morning I lie in bed, talking myself out of suicide. Wondering how much longer I can fight before I have nothing left in me.

I find myself wondering if life is even worth it anymore. I often feel like I’m just going crazy. My anger spiked after I lost all my friends, and I can’t seem to find the light in tunnel anymore. I’m alone even in a room full of people. I have no one to talk to, no shoulder to cry on, no one to hug me and tell me everythings going to be okay. I’m terrified of what I’m capable of. I scare myself. I’ve reached out for help and all I’ve gotten was “You just don’t do anything.”, “Oh you’re just grieving because you lost friends you’ll be okay”, “You’re not eating because you aren’t sleeping. You’ll be fine” 

My own mother won’t listen to me and I’m not sure I have enough fight left in me to keep doing this alone.